Movies are supposed to make you feel something ... sometimes that something is a deep, deep sense of regret.
One Reddit user asked:
What's the worst movie you ever seen?
... did you know there was a movie so bad that fans of the show it's based off of literally refuse to acknowledge its existence? Thanks, Shyamalan.
There Is No Film In Ba Sing Se
Giphy
Avatar: The Last Airbender
- JadiePi
You must be mistaken. There was never an Avatar Last Airbender movie made. Never. I'm a big fan so would love for a live action movie to be made. But alas, such an event has yet to occur.
Same, that would be awesome. There's literally no way for a movie like that to be terribly messed up.
It wasn't that the movie was so very bad. It was bad, undeniably, but on its own it's pretty unremarkably bad. Meh.
The problem is that the animated series is SO GOOD. The gap between the two is so vast that anyone who saw both just says "Nope, that wasn't The Last Airbender. Guess no live action movie was ever made."
Conflicting Emotions
The Emoji Movie- my girls made me sit through it when it first came out and I still haven't forgiven them.
I took six kids to see that for my daughter's birthday.
The theatre had those roomy, reclining seats. At the time I was going through a severe situational depression and was always exhausted.
I stretched out and had one of the best naps of my life through the entire movie, waking during final credits feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. The kids absolutely loved the movie, and we ate at Red Robin afterwards.
Best. Party. Ever.
Fight And Flight
Holmes and Watson
- Scicist
That movie triggered both my fight and flight responses.
I remember the director trying to hype it up by saying "Whatever type of comedy you're into, there's something here for you".
And the thing is, he was right....but probably not in the way he intended. The movie throws every type of humour up against the wall in the desperate hope that something will work: slapstick, gross-out, surreal, stupid...they even try throwing 'political' jokes in there to score a "duh huh America and Trump" chuckle.
I've never seen a movie flailing around so aimlessly for a cheap laugh.
No Mushu, No Cricket
Mulan live action, no mushu, no cricket, an actor who supports the Hong Kong police, and having to pay money to watch the movie on a service I'm already paying for!?
Plus they took away all of Mulan's growth and development as a soldier and as a woman.....and replaced it with some cheap magical "Use The Force" bull.
Like how could they leave out Cri-Kee bro...
- Smo0k
And to think this was the one movie people actually wanted a l I've action version. A more serious take without the talking animals and songs, but more on the war. Get Disney decided to go and again not listen to fans and basically copy the same story(only with no charm/emotion/struggle). Swear it's Rise of Skywalker all over again....Rey, Mulan, really Disney?!
A Deliberate Attack
Son of the mask. The entire time I had a WTF is happening look on my face. Then when it was over, I just turned the TV off and sat in the dark for a few minutes wondering what just happened.
That movie was a deliberate attack on billions of childhoods.
The CGI gives me night terrors
"It Was Like My Body Shut Down To Protect Itself"
Jason Derulo Cat GIF by Cats Movie
Giphy
Cats. Made it about 25 minutes before shutting it off
Due to the pandemic, there is an increasingly non-zero chance that someone died, and CATS was the last movie they ever saw.
Memory is one of my favorite musical numbers.
My brain literally shut off during the new CATS and theater employees physically woke me up a half hour after the movie ended. I legit only remember a chonky cat eating roaches, the first part of Memory, and then being woken up.
I was like, "oh sh*t I got caught out. If the theater staff were robbers, I'd be dead."
It was like my body shut down to protect itself, and I woke up for a song I like, then my soul left my body. I think I saw a cat wearing a cat skin suit, and like.. took it off like a fur coat to reveal that they're.. also.. a cat..
I had zero interest of trying to see it again. I did thoroughly like the 90's CATS movie because it was set up and shot as an actual stage production, and seeing it attempted in an actual film theatrical way was a cursed adventure into devilry.
3/10 with holy water and a crucifix.
The Retcon
Crimes of Grindelwald. The incompetency behind the basic rules of storytelling in that movie is unbelievable.
Agree. The retcon of "surprise! You're a Dumbledore!" Was so ridiculous.
It's worse when you think about the fact that JK Rowling wrote the whole script herself.
The creator of this entire universe who claims to know everything about it should know how to not mess up the story. But she was the person responsible for ruining it lol.
And also what happened to all the beasts in this one? They literally stopped existing.
- courtpan
That's One Way To Kill A Witch
Blair Witch 2.
I don't remember much detail, but I do remember that at one point a pentagram appears on somebody's stomach and somebody else says "Maybe it's just a rash!"
Lmao, this was going to be my answer.
Not only did it bizarrely deviate from the found footage style, but there were scenes that would jarringly jump from "filmed on professional cameras" to "this was filmed on a Nokia brick phone." The dialog was terrible. And I clearly remember one scene where the boom mic was visible for a stretch (not just a split second).
I vaguely recall that a large portion was literally filmed in a backyard, too. Still made money compared to its production costs, but the bait and switch by using the original's name pissed so many people off.
Blair Witch went from "this could be an entire franchise" to it disappearing from the film world for over a decade.
Deep Shame And Regret
2012: Doomsday. I have so much deep shame and regret that I wasted 90 minutes of my life watching that movie.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1132130/
Not to be confused with the semi-eponymous action flick, this rhinoceros bowel movement has got to be the most atrocious movie in all existence.
It was made as part of some kind of "Faith Films" project. You know, it's the type of movie religious groups have commissioned to put a strong religious point across in a cringe-inducing manner. Now, I have nothing against that concept, but when you execute it in a manner so bad that I want to gouge my eyes out just typing about it, you know there's something wrong.
The premise is as simple as it is idiotic - Some archaeologists discover a cross in an ancient Aztec temple, concluding that the Aztecs knew about Christ all along. They also discover a calendar that foretells a great catastrophe will occur in 2012, and only the dismal acting skills of the merry band of mentally handicapped people assembled to make the movie can make it all go away.
There's a Latina pregnant woman / Virgin Mary clone that gives birth on an ancient pagan altar, thereby saving us from doom, the archaeologist's ex wife, played by a French actress who can't put two meaningful English sentences together, and, of course, the skeptic nurse who discovers God after a platitude-ridden talk in her car.
You have to see this movie to believe something like it can exist. How in the world this got past any sort of quality control and into world-wide distribution is beyond me. To this day I bring it up when talking with my brother from time to time since he was the one that suggested we watch it.
- Mind101
Wait ... There Are Two?!
An animated version of the titanic - at the end it said "and they all lived happily ever after"
I've heard of this. There's multiple movies. The "happily ever after" element is a complete disrespect to all of those who lost their lives or were affected by a very real tragedy.
So are you talking the one with the rapping dog, or the one with the talking octopus? Because after someone made a terrible animated ripoff of the James Cameron flick, somebody thought it would be a good idea to ripoff the ripoff.
- Stoly23
The ship still sank, but they made it so everybody survived. Although I'm not sure which of the two Titanic animated movies OP is talking about: the one with the rapping dog, or the one with the whaler-talking sharks conspiracy and the puppy-faced octopus.
- FM1091