While not necessarily bad–but undoubtedly not a classic by any stretch of the imagination–I just can't get enough of Deep Blue Sea (1999).
It has everything: Killer sharks. A sexy cast. Samuel L. Jackson. A (sexy) scientist who breaks laws and violates scientific ethics in pursuit of a cure for Alzheimer's. LL Cool J. Explosions.
Oh, and did I mention the killer sharks (including the one who eats Samuel L. Jackson)?
Yep, I never tire of that movie and think it's GREAT. It succeeds at all the crazy stuff it sets out to do.
But there's no doubt it's not for everyone. For one, some people really don't like horror movies, let alone creature movies... or B-movies.
That's okay, though!
There's truly something out there for everyone, as we were so kindly reminded by Redditor batknight373, who asked the online community:
"What's a movie you love even though you know it's pretty objectively bad?"
Super Mario Bros. (1993)
"Super Mario Bros. I saw this with my buddies on opening weekend and we loved it. Watch it at least every other year and still enjoy the heck out of it, it's a pretty fun flick."
123throwawaybanana
This wasn't my cup of tea but I did watch it a few times as a kid.
My cousins definitely liked it, for what it's worth.
The Happening (2008)
"The Happening suffered from audience expectations. I still theorize that Shaymalan was going for a cheesy Twilight Zone vibe and, with that in mind, it was perfect."
russellamcleod
Giphy
This movie could have been an amazing Twilight Zone homage had its execution been more finely handled.
As it stands, M. Night just can't seem to get it together most of the time.
I still rememeber the utterly savage reviews when this one came out!
White Chicks (2004)
"White Chicks."
"There’s a lot to analyze about the film and many would probably first go after the fact that it’s essentially white face and misogynistic, but forget they’re spoofing the vain lifestyle of rich Caucasian heiresses that became popular at the time along with some top tier comedy gold."
sketchysketchist
For some reason, a teacher thought it was a good idea to show this to us during an afterschool program.
What was up with that?! The early 2000s were an odd time.
Queen of the Damned (2002)
"Queen of the Damned. It’s far from an adaptation of the book and for a generic goth vampire movie with edgy music it’s good."
vampiresorcerer666
Giphy
This was a film I watched multiple times on pay-per-view back when pay-per-view was a thing.
I don't know why I kept coming back.
Also, rest in peace, Aaliyah and Anne Rice.
Wild Wild West (1999)
"Wild Wild West. It was MEANT to be silly and funny and over the top, but people judged it as a legitimate western and of course it falls flat there."
Ashley9225
You see, I couldn't like it even when I understood what it was going for.
I just didn't think any of it worked.
At the very least, it has the great Kenneth Branaugh being hammy as hell.
Dungeons and Dragons (2000)
"For the more well-known answer, Dungeons & Dragons. The only real saving grace is Jeremy Irons' performance because he chews the scenery as hard as possible for every minute he's on screen."
neohylanmay
Jeremy Irons acted like he was in a different movie and it truly showed.
Everyone else just struggles to keep up with him and the script really doesn't help matters either.
Apparently there's going to be another take on Dungeons and Dragons, so we'll see how that goes.
The Lair of the White Worm (1988)
"The Lair of the White Worm. The Claymation worm eating Jesus off the cross is peak cinema, to be honest."
hidetheroaches
Giphy
Now here is a film I did not expect to (ever) see any mention of!
I love this movie.
Ken Russell directed some brilliant films and some schlock, too, and this one was definitely a product of his weird, schlocky phase.
I think I came across it late one night when I was young.
It was weird and trippy and creeped me out.
Well done.
Phantom of the Paradise (1974)
"Phantom of the Paradise. Those that know, will know."
thunderboltsnow
Oh, I definitely know.
Not my favorite DePalma but early DePalma is definitely interesting, even if his ideas don't always work.
Movie 43 (2013)
"Movie 43. It's a f**king horrible horrible shitshow and I've watched it like 15 times."
rexiesoul
Giphy
How did you do it?
HOW?
You are a stronger soul than I!
The 13th Warrior (1999)
"The 13th Warrior. Based on Michael Crichton's Eaters of the Dead. After the monumental success of Jursssic Park his works became highly sought after. So they found this savage book he wrote and gave it a safer name, The 13th Warrior."
"The issue I had was they underplayed the brutality of the tribe. The movie wasn't bad it just didn't capture the essence of the book and in turn it felt underwhelming."
Kinetic-Pen
This is a pretty spot on assessment.
I remember reading Eaters of the Dead as a teenager–I definitely went through a Crichton phase–and being struck by its violence in addition to what it had to say.
The film adaptation is pretty watered down by comparison.
Well, fellow film watchers, what do you think?
While you might have a mixed opinion on some of these, there's no doubt that they're bound to please other viewers. There's something out there for everyone, no matter how variable the quality.
Have some recommendations of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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Reddit user Purple_Pineapple_752 asked:
"If God gave you his powers for 1 hour, What would you do?"
So here's the thing, Reddit has no chill.
Like none.
So every random whim, thought, or chip on people's shoulders certainly came out in the comments.
And honestly... it's delicious.
Some Redesigns Needed
"Redesign human knee and shoulder joints. Because, seriously, I've got some bug reports that have been ignored."
- m_sporkboy
"You’ve got my vote! As a nearly 30yr old with chronic arthritis, I’d say thank you!"
- RiskyBisc
"Yup. Tore my ACL the other month in college football and am now a 'house potato' according to my dad."
- Bu11tproofTiger
"Both of my shoulders are reconstructed. My hips are finished as well an I'm in my 30s ."
"I think the human body needs to be made of better quality parts at this point lol"
- lolparty247
GiphyGame Time
"Elected politicians, and candidates for office can no longer lie."
"Intentionally or unintentionally, every thing they express will be truth. If they try to lie, it will come out truth."
"This is not meant to be wholly benevolent."
"No half truths. No vagaries. The plain and objective truth, or silence. Those are their options."
"And it applies to all elected politicians, officially government sponsored ones (MPs) or otherwise, like say the elected spokesman of the IRA."
"Let the games begin."
- AlphaTangoFoxtrt
"This is actually terrifying."
"Imagine you are elected. You want to know the nuclear launch codes? No worries, just try to state the first character in the sequence."
"You cannot lie. So what you say will come out as correct. Now just have someone write it down."
"Want the password to the white house twitter account? No worries, just get someone to vote you into some form of office. Could be you and joe-no-body, it doesn't matter."
"Privacy would end overnight."
"No no no, you want them to not be able to tell intentional lies. Then at least it's limited to things they know. And just for good measure, give every elected official a strong sense of questioning their own knowledge."
- UFO64
"I feel like this power will end up being a monkeys paw. You try to do good but it has an equal/opposite reaction..."
"You make it so politicians can't lie, and the followers just accept it and still vote them into power."
"Make it so people have critical thinking and aren't easily misled by conspiracies and propaganda, then I dunno, maybe we find out we needed conspiracies in our life and we now no longer question anything.. Idk.."
"You remove corruption and it has some unforeseen knock on impact where now South American or African countries become super powers and a new cold war erupts with new players."
"Yeh monkeys paw... Beware of this power..."
- splashbodge
GiphyToast Technicalities
"Create various images on toast and have fun watching believers react to them."
- CaptchaSolvingRobot
"But technically... they would be right because it was you as God!! You!!"
- SonOfARemington
"I’ve often wondered how many people eat their Jesus toast without ever bothering to check."
"Extending the thought, how many people actually do check their toast only to think to themselves, 'Hey! It’s Keanu Reeves!' ”
- smeeding
GiphyCan We Vote For This Person?
"1st of all, I would make it so that everyone napping always wakes up refreshed. All naps now last 23 minutes but feel like 4 hours of perfect sleep."
"Nothing is addictive."
"All men are given perfect recall about everything their wives have said or done."
"All women obtain positive body images."
"Taco trees."
"People who are cool never have their shoe laces come undone. A-holes have their laces break every Friday."
"Dogs stay small puppies for 3 extra months and come out potty trained."
"Turtles can play trumpet."
"America switches to metric with no fuss."
"The internet makes sense to everyone over 70....but they chose to avoid social media anyway."
"Corn syrup goes away."
"All religions announce simultaneously that God is kinda... but not exactly gay."
"Every swastika owned drawn or tattooed is slowly burned away over a week. It hurts really bad and is replaced by a picture of a teddy bear blowing a very startled looking Nick Cage."
- Ethandrul
"You had me at trumpet turtles and taco trees."
- fallen87angel
"I also choose this god."
- PBnBacon·
GiphyAssuming I'm Still Interested
"Assuming I’m still really interested in Earth, get us back to zero or a good starting point."
"Remove all trash and pollution everywhere. It just ceases to exist."
"Complete all municipal separated storm sewer projects instantly."
"Instantly create storm water gardens wherever necessary. Instantly eliminate lawn culture and convert to lawn alternatives to eliminate run off."
"Instantly convert all power generation to safe thorium nuclear and renewable. Instantly convert all sea shipping to clean nuclear."
"Instantly convert all cars to electric. Create charging stations at every residence."
"Instantly convert all heavy construction equipment to a safer fuel (I don’t know what yet). Instantly put solar panels on every structure/house. Instantly create bike lanes everywhere. Instantly create bike culture of the Netherlands everywhere."
"Upgrade everywhere to high speed rail systems similar to Japan. Switch all roads to permeable pavement."
"Instantly perform major upgrades on every structure, road and bridge everywhere. Have all work go to new construction and maintenance."
"Instantly install field drains and timer stadium lights in all playing fields."
"Instantly process all rape kits in all police stations."
"Instantly repair all playgrounds and park features everywhere."
"Automatically register everyone to vote. Create 10 new states out of Texas and California. Instantly pass political reform."
"Legalize all drugs. Instantly create more treatment centers."
"Instantly cure all ailments that are in recovery in hospital and would cure naturally. Instantly move those patients back home."
"Instantly kill all patients who would die naturally. Instantly inform all families."
"Instantly remove all graveyards and eliminate practice of saving dead. Create new ritual of donation to science or turn into tree."
"Instantly create depression cure. Instantly create obesity cure. Instantly create formula to grow/repair existing teeth."
"Instantly change taxation rate to post WW2 for businesses. Instantly change view of all workers to pro-union."
"Instantly identify and eliminate all political corruption. Have everyone just realize all this exists."
"Eliminate all religious belief everywhere. Instantly create belief in helping neighbors, being a good person, and creating a heaven on earth."
"Eliminate all mosquitoes. Bring back bees."
"Is time up? Was that an hour?"
- winnower8
GiphyOne Solution To The Fossil Fuel Issue
"Having given it some thought:"
"Easy parthenogenesis for all humans, regardless of their biological sex and mental identity."
"And the natural ability to self terminate pregnancies. And self. That would wipe out a whole bunch of angst and repression in the world."
"The ability to fly, as someone else suggested, at fairly rapid speeds. This would vastly change society, no more cars, planes, elevators, stairs, possibly no more country borders, it would be nearly impossible to enforce. The demand for oil would plummet and the environment would be healthier."
"Extra longevity, with senescence happening only a few years before death."
- CanadianJogger
GiphyGenderqueer Garlic Bread
"Make an easily accessed and super powerful source of electrical energy that's renewable and environmentally friendly, it's also easily accessed (this could just be 100% efficient solar gen, or a generator that somehow turns heat back into useable energy? I dunno I'll be god, I could figure it out)."
"Cure All Diseases"
"Humanity now has the ability to magically transform themselves freely to look however they choose, provided it's still anthropomorphic."
"I'm genderqueer; this would make it so all the non-cis people wouldn't need expensive drugs and surgery, or suffering, although I guess we'd be dealing with a few furries but y'know that's fine with me."
"Reverse earth's environmental damage back to pre-industrial while maintaining all the infrastructure changes."
"Finally, all major US and Canadian highways are underground and infinitely maintainable, AND there's also Bullet Trains that run underground with them along the WHOLE interstate/400 Series and Extension/Trans-Can that way I NEVER HAVE TO DRIVE AN HOUR TO WORK AGAIN."
"AND all Cities with populations over 10K have more-than-adequate 100% free public transit that's also so efficient the busses/trains/trolleys/whatever are never late."
"OH one more thing: Since everyone is gonna be sexy because of the Shapeshifting, everyone is either pansexual, or ace, and the people that are ace aren't seen as weird and are completely respected in their orientation. And we all have an innate sense both to locate each other and to locate garlic bread."
- someBrokeCanadian
GiphyThe Timer
"I would set a timer for 10 years and then everyone dies and the earth explodes. I would make everyone aware of the timer."
"I think that would eliminate a lot of bullshit around the world like war and hate, and would make for a really good last time alive until we all die together."
"Am I a weirdo?"
- DoobieMcBeast
GiphySky Farm
"Erase COVID"
"Curse everyone whose name was listed in the Pandora Papers to spontaneously explode somewhere in public and just let the media chips fall where they will."
"Create a sky-dwelling jellyfish that eats carbon fumes and whose tentacles contain a chemical that makes you feel total euphoria for 8 hours straight."
"See how long it takes humans to turn them into a carbon-sucking, drug-producing sky farm animal."
- NebulaPlural
"I am 100% on board for carbon-Hoover-jelly-sky-fish-farms."
"Magnificent."
- sinskins
Giphy"Because Who Wouldn't?"
"I'd get rid of all mental impairment diseases and conditions. Alzheimers, Dementia, the severe mental impairment that some kids are born with (Not sure what the various conditions are called)."
"I would make humans and other animals immune to cancer. I would extend healthy human lifespans by another 50 years, and dogs and cats can also live as long as humans."
"I would then give humans the ability to research and cure other diseases and ailment so that mankind could eventually have treatments for such things as they come along. I say this because I only get an hour and things will appear in the future that can't be predicted (even with God's power)."
"And lastly, I'd of course, give my self a bigger dick, because who wouldn't?"
- ClownfishSoup
GiphyOh you didn't honestly think we were going to get through an article about god-like powers and NOT have someone use it for penises... did you?
Come on now.
You're not THAT new on the internet.
You know how people are around here.
What would YOU use your god-like powers for now that you've read some of Reddits ideas? Let us know in the comments.
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Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.