We all have different pain tolerances. One individual's joy is another's joint and back pain. Depends on the threshold, and what we're willing to accept and put up with. Once that level is hit, it becomes a hell you can't escape from.
And the worst part? That pain might come and go, a wave ebbing against you, pushing you.
Some solace you can take is you're not alone in feeling pain.
*The following article contains discussion of sexual assault.
Reddit user, Jeremykyb, wanted to know when it's just the absolute pits when they asked:
"what is the worst feeling?"
It feels bad, but to reach the end, we have to start.
It Only Goes Downhill From Here
"My first thought was wet socks, but the answers here are way worse."
triton2toro
Unable To Find That Connection
"Trying hard to make friends but failing , honestly nothing worse than talking to yourself in a group of people ."
living_sunshine
"this hit me harder than most other things here, I've spent my entire life just trying to find someone or some people to hang out with but I'm just the awkward outcast all the time. I have no one to be with physically."
Fluffyturtle225
When It's Actually 0/100
"I know relationships are never 50/50 but loving someone more than they love you after spending years with them. Finding out from your friends that your significant other is sleeping around hurts bad when its 100% unexpected. The heart sinks straight down to your feet and the mind goes down a rabbit hole of thoughts and emotions on why you weren't good enough."
whosyodaddy328
Knowing It's Going To End
"For me personally, it was coming to the conclusion that this really great friend I had throughout high school was slipping away from me. It wasn’t as if they’d changed or anything, they were still that great person I knew. It was just that we went from talking to each other all the time to waving, and now to just not really talking anymore. I know that as I’m finishing up my last year and as I move on with life, most of the people I’ve met through high school will be a distant memory, but right now it’s just the worst feeling when you know a friendship that you really valued and tried to make work, in the end, just didn’t."
billy20115
Being The Only One Not In Love
"The worst feeling that I have ever felt happened in 6th grade. My whole lunch table ( except for me ) was dating somebody and had the whole school liking them. I was just sitting at the corner of the lunch table, eating my food watching them talk to their gfs and everyone else who liked them meanwhile they would brag to me about it every time they left."
"That’s not the worst feeling tho. The worst part is how they would degrade me and make me feel like I’m not a human being so much even after making fun of me for not having a gf. They would always call me fat and make fun of me for being black which I can’t control, and then when I lashed out at them they always said I had anger issues. I always struggled with finding my place in the community considering I’m one of the only black kids in a white dominated school and area, and they just made me feel like an outcast. I still have no gf and I still get made fun of for something I cannot control. That is the worst feeling to me."
IlyVox
Hiding Who You Really Are
"Being forced to act different around other people cause you know they would react negatively to who you are(as an example, my parents are extreme right wingers who are very racist and homophobic so I just have to act like I’m the same)
"Despacitoian
Is the pain within you? Or is the pain happening to someone else and you're unable to do anything to stop it?
Is that pain equal?
Not Trying To Be A Creep, But It's Too late
"Making a girl uncomfortable by accident."
New-Inspector7070
Good-Bye To Family
"A few years ago I euthanized an elderly woman’s elderly cat. She’d lost her only daughter to cancer and her husband the month before."
"I asked if there was anything I could do for her. She looked down at her cat in her arms, started to cry, and between sobs said “I just want my family back.”"
"If you find something worse than sitting there powerless as an old woman’s heart breaks over the sudden and permanent loss of all of her loved ones, you have my profound sympathy. Because that was awful."
TankVet
Can't Quite Kick The Habit
"Watching someone you care about mess up their life. All you can do is watch"
just-existing-here
"I tried so hard to help my younger brother with his alcoholism and I couldn’t. It was a feeling of dread, desperation, hope (he was good at saying the right thing). It’s hard to watch."
longwalktoday
When It's Your Job And You Still Feel Like You're Not Doing Enough
"People crying to you for crisis help and being unable to help them."
"I work in a place where I get 60-100 calls a day of people in crisis (mostly homelessness) desperate for someone to help or point them in the direction of help. I often get blamed for their problems despite my job just being to answer the phones and having nothing to do with their matters whatsoever. I legally cannot assist with their problem but I can listen."
"I used to be homeless so I actually understand what it’s like to be in their position."
"I hope one day I can be in a position where I can make a difference in these people’s lives, and hopefully, save them"
OkConsideration1111
How Would You Turn It Around?
"Losing hope. Specifically the hope that things will get better."
brushpickerjoe
"The feeling of a full blown depression. When all the hope and happiness you used to feel suddenly disappear and every thought about your future turns into despair. The feeling that it will never end and that you will never feel happiness again. There is no way out and nothing will ever change for the better again."
"But after an infinitely long time, there eventually comes a moment where your mind becomes clear and for the first time in forever, you remember why live is worth living. That moment was the happiest of my life."
Latron23
Some People Don't Deserve To Have Kids
"How about a parent telling you they don't love you?"
"When I was 12 my father got another woman pregnant, so decided to divorce my mother for other woman. On his last day coming by the house ever, he came into my room to say goodbye and as he was leaving he told me, in pretty much these exact words, "I want you to know that I don't love you anymore and I am going to start a new family now. You probably won't ever see me again." He then walked out of my room. I ran out of my room screaming and crying holding on to my dad's leg begging him not to leave as he dragged me down the hall, my mother screaming/crying, to have him basically shake me off, curse, and bolt out the door. Next time I saw him I was 17."
"It was a pretty messed up thing and it REALLY hurt me as a kid."
GeneticsGuy
Doing What You Can To Protect Your Loved Ones
"Knowing that I can't take the pain away from my daughter from being betrayed and sexually abused at age 4. Six years to get justice and he's out in less than a year. All I can do is keep her safe, make sure she knows speaking up was right and that it wasn't her fault, and to make sure she knows her parents love her."
Signal_Host307
Nothing Can Compare
"The grief from the death of a loved. Lost the love of my life after her 5 year battle with Ovarian cancer. We were happily married 31 years. It was like someone had cut open my chest and ripped my heart out."
renewed_artist
"Semi-related: seeing the decline of a loved one. In my case, it would be my parents."
"I can't speak for anyone else but for me this is the single most depressing thing in life."
"Your parents are never old until they suddenly are. They fall down and get injured. They don't have the energy to go up the stairs in their own home. They can't cook your favorite dish on your birthday."
"Suddenly it hits you; they're elderly and you've been treating them like they're still the dark-haired workhorses from your childhood. You finally take a moment to think back and you see the signs of their deteriorating health. A stumble here. A fainting spell there. A cut or bruise that takes forever to heal. But it was no big deal because your parents have always been strong. They've never slowed down for anything."
"You look across the table at the suddenly frail woman sitting in front of you, squinting at her crossword puzzle and realize that you don't know how much more time you'll have together. It's then that you truly gain an appreciation for all your parents have done for you and what they will continue to do for you."
"You resolve to return the favor in what little time remains, not knowing that just by breathing you'd paid that debt long ago."
Denster1
A Feeling Without Compare
"Watching your own child die in your arms."
Bout3Fidy
"This is unfortunately the correct answer. I hope, and I mean this in the nicest way, that all the parents out there die before their children. Nobody should have to bury their child."
BingusBeerus
"There is literally a separate classification of grief that is mainly experienced by parents who watched their own children die, it’s classified as “complex grief.” I watched my 10 year old sister pass from a brainstem tumor with each parent holding a hand. It is still the most unbearable grief I’ve ever known, which makes the realization that my grief will never hold a candle to my parents’ almost impossible to wrap my head around."
"If you watched one of your children pass before your eyes, know that you have countless people’s condolences and respect in equal measure."
Ellislsland
Maybe now is the time to send that text or return that call? Could be worth it.
If you or someone you know experienced sexual assault, help is out there. You can reach the RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline by calling 1-800-656-4673, use their Live Chat tool: https://www.rainn.org/get-help, or visit the National Sexual Violence Resource Center’s website.
In Canada, help is available through the Ending Violence Association of Canada website.
International resources can be found through the Rape Crisis Network Europe website.