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People Share The Best Things Their Parents Ever Taught Them

People Share The Best Things Their Parents Ever Taught Them
Photo by sofatutor on Unsplash

Ah, parents. The true grey area when it comes to forming relationships. And while many children have to, unfortunately, learn from their parents mistakes, other times they tell us what we really need to hear. These Redditors are going to tell you the best wisdom that their parents ever gave them.

Reddit user iamrootnotgroot asked:

Adults, what's something your parents did right raising you?

This is so important.

"I remember being told it was very important to admit when you're wrong, and I think that was solid advice. But I could be wrong."- ixnayupidstay

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"My mom always made a point of apologizing to us after we had a fight with her and admitting anything she'd done wrong."

"I remember having one big fight when I was in high school where I threw a complete tantrum and screamed at her."

"Afterwards, she came upstairs and said, 'You were right; I was being unreasonable'."

"That was maybe not the most mature way to tell me, but you were right and I'm sorry'."

"It made such a difference to know that my mom would actually listen to and respect the things I said, and it made me do the same for her."

"It totally baffles me when parents don't want to apologize to their kids or admit they're wrong because they think their kids won't respect them anymore."

"The fact is your kids already know you're wrong, they want to know if you know it and if you respect them enough to admit it."- palacesofparagraphs

So wholesome.

"Supported my (then) unusual interests."

"I was into astronomy as a younger kid and they bought books and telescopes and drove me to/from the local astronomy club at late hours."

"Later (this was the 80s) they bought me a series of computers which were pretty expensive for the time and for their income."

"I'm grateful they supported what I was into."- Dapper_Presentation

That's good.

"They instilled a good work ethic."

"If you do something half-a**ed, you'll have to put 2 a**es in to fix your f*** ups."

"If your name is going on it, make it your best."

"They also always encouraged my creativity."

" Never told me I wasn't capable of something."

"They always told me I can accomplish anything I want as long as I put effort into it."

"My parental units are awesome."- HanginWithLucretia

TRUTH.

"Taught me the importance of quality duct tape."- Imbalancedone

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Yes yes yes.

"You can do whatever you want but you are responsible for your choices."- Arriabella


"This is the single biggest thing my mom did in raising me."

'I never had curfews or restrictions and she trusted me to not be a dumba**."

"If I was a dumba**, it was my own fault and I'd have to fix it on my own (within the scope of capability at a given age)."

"My mom operated on 'I'll trust you unless you give me a reason not to'."

"I never gave her a reason not to trust me and we never had problems about it."

"We still argued over religion and other normal parent/teen stuff."

"But not about where I went or with whom and when I'd be back (again, within reason and respective to a given age)."

"I believe people who say they had strict or controlling parents, but I can't relate to it."- JerseyHurricane

Schitts Creek Comedy GIF by CBC Giphy

Great advice.

"They made sure I understood money, money management, saving for retirement, etc."

"Made my life so much easier have never had to worry about money or debt a day in my life."- FlameFrenzy


More parents should be like this.

"They treated me like an adult."

"Never belittled what I was feeling or what was meaningful to me, and explained practicalities of life when need be."

"'Because I said so' was NOT a common phrase."

"Also, they were the most supportive parents anyone could ask for, and they had the time to get involved with the things I did."

"My dad taught me scientific wonder and mentored my robotics team."

"My mom volunteered for all my theatre and music stuff while simultaneously serving on school boards, PTOs, Friends of Music, curriculum committees, and about a hundred other things."

"They are just incredible people."- nernthestrudel

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Sounds like a great dad.

"My dad always made my brother and I take the lead."

"He would obviously always know what was going on and would be a few steps ahead of us."

"If we were in a new city, we would be in charge of working out which bus to take, or if we were cooking, we'd be reading the recipe and telling my dad what to do, etc."

"It's pretty simple but it meant we were pretty good at doing things ourselves and were already really independent before leaving home."

"We were visiting London once and I managed to get on the tube before the doors closed, but my dad did not."

"I knew where we had to change so just got off at the stop and waited for the next train with him on."

"I think most 8 year olds might have freaked out a bit."- ThisArsehole

A useful life lesson.

"My mom always made me try a bite of any food in front of her before she'd allow the 'I don't like it' line."

"Now, thanks to her, I'm willing to try any food/drink once, even if I think I won't like it."

"I'm glad she did that."- dontaskmethatmoron

No free rides.

"Made me work."

"There wasn't a free ride, chores and working on the farm weren't an option, they were mandatory."

"As long as school work was done and I wasn't at practice or a game, I was expected to be helping, and that meant work all summer long too."- sitdwnandhngon

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.....can you give me some tips?

"Never gave me a cent to spend."

"I earned every single dollar of my wealth throughout my life."

"I'm in my mid 30s and if I lose all my money tomorrow I won't even be that stressed because I know how to earn it back because I've done it before."- vadermustdie

Well that took a turn.

"Father: Taught me in the early 00's (when I was 16-20 or so) how to use computers, so I wouldn't be one of those people later in life going 'dUr wHaTs A cOmpUtEr1!1'"

"Godfather: Taught me not to spend money foolishly, but don't be afraid to spend it."

"You can't take it with you when you're gone."- DemonKyoto

There are benefits to playing sports.

"They pushed me into basketball and sports in general, even though I wanted to quit every other weekend."

"I was pretty fat as a kid and I naturally didn't like it at all at first, but it ended up being great for me, both for health reasons and for socializing."

"The latter was also very important, cause I had no long-lasting friends since my parents moved every year and I always had to change schools."- I_hate_traveling

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Old school advice, but still useful.

"Controversial one but as a kid but don't start any physical violence but if someone punches you, punch them back."

"I seemed to be targeted for bullying and violence in school and this helped."

"As soon as someone knows you will fight back, 9/10 will give up."

"Definitely different as an adult though."

"As an adult I'd rather just avoid any physical violence entirely because the chances are, if they are getting into physical violence, they probably don't have a lot to lose and you don't want to get stabbed or something."- SlightlyIncandescent

You never know how people will behave

"My dad taught me that no matter how mad you are, it's best to apologize than to make things worse because it will often do no good to get more riled up than is necessary."

"My mom taught me that not everyone is going to like me and thats okay and if they don't like me, they're missing out."- Dropped-Croissant·

They set me on the right path

"I'm very grateful that my parents raised me 'Liberal' and always with a critical and open mindset, that was almost the reason why got good grades and the friends I have now."- Deutschi

Register To Vote Election Day GIF by Creative Courage Giphy

Taught me essential skills

"My mother taught me how to cook and sew in effect making me very self-sufficient."- mehdihs

Consequences for bad decisions were punishment enough

"My mom never set any rules for me, she let me figure things out myself and supported me if I made the wrong decision."

"She never punished me for anything, negative consequences was my punishment (like drinking too much and vomiting)."

"She constantly told me about stupid sh*t she did as a teen."

"I always felt loved, supported and free."

"I never had any reason to rebel or lie to her."

"She treated me like a person and she was always so proud of me."

"She was my best friend and I’ll always be so grateful that I got to have such a wonderful mother for 18 years."

"I miss her with every heartbeat."- MjauDuuude

Excited Season 2 GIF by Gilmore Girls Giphy

Opened my eyes to new experiences and healthy food!

"Mine were mostly a**holes so the good stuff stands out lol."

"Two things compete for the title of 'Best Thing They Taught Me'."

"One was their enthusiasm for diversity."

"They were always hanging around immigrants or foreign visitors, both to give them a hand settling in, and to hear all about their homeland, get a taste of their traditional foods, etc."

"They took us to various multicultural stuff from visiting Chinatown, Little Italy etc whenever we were in a city big enough to have such areas."

"To attending festivals where those of assorted backgrounds showed off their traditional art, costumes, performances and foods."

"I absorbed the idea that, when you encounter something that is new and strange, rather than being uncomfortable, you should be excited that now your day is more interesting and you are becoming more cultured."

"And the idea that minorities are our friends, colleagues and neighbors, not some Other, who Our Kind avoids."

"This was pretty revolutionary because we lived in a region without much diversity of culture, faith or race, and were surrounded by bigots."



​"The other one was healthy eating."

"Some health nut parents raise their kids badly risking rebound."

"Like a gal at my gym, last I heard her kids were around 5, and had never tasted sugar or flour, or many other things like chips/crisps."

"I'm sure that works about as well as abstinence-only sex ed y'know?"

"Those kids will be drawn to the mysterious and forbidden junk food items, out of curiosity and rebellion."

"As soon as they are old enough to sneak around they will be huge gluttons."

"My parents on the other hand didn't try to forbid anything."

"If I ate a third helping of dessert they would just say 'hm wonder why that is!'"

"When I mentioned a sore stomach later helping me notice consequences for mistreating my body."

"The way they pushed me to adopt their healthy way of eating was, more carrot than stick."

"My mother would flip right out about something like 'OMG you have GOT to try some of this melon!'"

"'It is the best melon I have ever had!'"

"'Wow, check out the texture, the flavour, wowww!'"

"Repeat for a good batch of carrots, beans, broccoli, nectarines etc.'"

"I absorbed her excitement over some batches of produce being better than others, which translated into an excitement over buying produce."

"Or 'Mmm sample a spoonful of this soup I just made!'"

"So rich in taste and texture eh?'"

"'So comforting on a cold day like this!'"

"'I can hardly wait to get back from our outing and have it for supper!'"


"She never argued against junk food just argued for health food."

"Like on a wintry day she never said 'Hot chocolate is unhealthy, full of sugar and caffeine'."

"'You should have this pureed squash soup instead, a much healthier way to warm up'."

"And indeed, once in awhile she was in the mood for garbage and brought out the cocoa and marshmallows herself."

"She didn't make unhealthy food seem off limits, just demonstrated choosing it seldom, and choosing healthier stuff as her normal default habit."

"To this day I default to veggies and other nutritious snacks, and fail to see any magic in junk food."- StopPoopinInMyLilacs

fitness eat clean GIF Giphy

A penny saved is a penny earned

"They gave me an allowance and took half of it and put it in a savings fund."

"Meanwhile if I wanted to buy anything I had to use the money I had earned from my allowance."

"They wouldn't buy me toys or video games unless it was my birthday."

"It's made me better at appreciating my money and saving no matter how much extra I have at the end of the check."- Mehtevas52

Never underestimate logic!

"My dad taught me critical thinking skills, particularly in investing."

"Things like, 'If it sounds too good to be true it probably is'."- Nelsb85

The lessons our parents and guardians teach us can last a lifetime. What would you add to this list? Let us know in the comments.

Old Wives' Tales People Still Believe For Some Reason

"Reddit user the_spring_goddess asked: 'What is an old wives tale that people still believe?'"

Close up of an owl tilting their head to side, looking bewildered
Photo by Josh Mills

The old wives' tales.

They are the stories of legend.

I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.

Where did they originate?

WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!

You don't hear about them as much anymore.

It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.

But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.

Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:

"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"

"Wait an hour to swim after eating."

What a crock!

So many summer hours wasted.

I want revenge for that one.

Say Nothing

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"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."

LonelyMail5115

"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."

I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA

Say Something

"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."

Severe_Airport1426

"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."

crappycurtains

"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."

AlbinoShavedGorilla

Body Temps

"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."

chriseo22

"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."

"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."

apocalypticradish

Arms Down

"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."

Fatmouse84

10 Years Actually

Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine Giphy

"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."

REDDIT

"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."

Gecko-911

I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.

This tale is haunting.

High/Low

Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace Giphy

"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."

LeastFormal9366

"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."

IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI

The Cursed

"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."

"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."

SmoreOfBabylon

Stay In

"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."

"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."

worldbound0514

Dreams and Facts

"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."

"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."

mattshonestreddit

"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."

Darthdemented

Cracked

Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office Giphy

"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."

Choice-Grapefruit-44

"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."

MacyTmcterry

I love my knuckles.

Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.

lottery tickets
Erik Mclean on Unsplash

A lot of workers daydream about some day winning the lottery and being able to say goodbye to their job.

Far too many workers are unhappy with their job duties, workplace dynamics or company culture.

But with a taste for luxuries like housing and food, they keep plugging away, year after year.

However not everyone feels that way about their job.

So what are these compelling careers?

Keep reading... Show less
Aerial view of a church in a small town
Sander Weeteling/Unsplash

There's something comforting about living in a small town.

It's characterized by close communities where neighbors know each other by name and there is an abundance of kindness extended to others.

Gift-giving is a commonality, as is the sharing of recipes, and people going out of their way to help each other in a time of need.

The pace of living in small towns is also a striking contradiction to city life, where crowds of people go about their busy lives without much interaction.

Curious to hear more examples of what small town living is like, Redditor official_biz asked:

"What's the most 'small town' thing you've witnessed?"

These are positive examples of a tight-knit community.

Live Updates

"We have a village Facebook page. Every time the ice cream man drives into the village, the entire page goes ballistic. People send live updates of where the van is and which direction he's heading. The ice cream man has started accepting DMs so he knows which streets to go down."

– PyrrhuraMolinae

Brush With The Law

"I’m from a town of less than 2,000 people. When I worked at the grocery store there people would often drop off stuff for my family members because they didn’t want to drive all the way down to our house. I no longer live there but recently got a call from my daughter. She had been stopped for speeding and handed over her license and insurance which happens to be in my mother’s name. The officer goes 'Hey, you’re Donnie’s granddaughter! I ain’t gonna write you a ticket but I’m telling Donnie when I see him tomorrow cause we’re going fishing.' She replied 'I think I’d rather have the ticket.'”

- Reddit

Roadside Catchup

"The traffic on the 'main street' of my town is so sparse, two drivers going opposite directions can stop and talk to each other for a few minutes without causing any problem."

– anon

When things go wrong, people take notice without incident.

Bank Robbery

"A guy robbed a bank and everyone knew immediately who he was and the teller got mad at him."

– AlexRyang

"A local bank was robbed and one of the tellers told the police to bring her a yearbook from about ten years earlier and she would be able to point the robber out. He had been in the grade before hers in school."

– Strict_Condition_632

Wise Woman

"When I worked at the bank in town there was an older lady that had worked there through 5 mergers."

"She knew everyone, there was a young guy yelling at me one day. She walked out of the back and he immediately quieted. She went off about telling his grandmother that he was treating young women like sh*t. She also said that if he didn’t straighten up not one girl in town would ever marry him she would make sure of it."

– ilurvekittens

Intoxicated Local

"Town drunk was paralyzed and used a motorized wheelchair to get around. I was driving home one Saturday night and said town drunk was passed out in his wheelchair doing circles almost directly in the town square. Had to call his brother who came and picked him up on a rollback truck. Strapped him down and drove off into the cold dark night."

– DoodooExplosion

Grazing Over To The Bar

"In my former small town, there was an older guy who'd lost his license after getting a few DUIs. Every day, he would ride his John Deere lawnmower to the corner bar around 3PM and sit around watching TV and sipping his beer well into the night. Then he'd head the couple miles back home on his mower. He even had a little canvass shell he put on when it rained or got too cold."

– brown_pleated_slacks

It's not surprising how small town people behave differently than those who are from metropolitan areas.

Welcoming Committee

"I lived in a small town. When I moved there, people would ask, 'Whose house did you buy?'"

–MoonieNine

"Move to a small town. 30 years later, you are still the new guy."

– impiousdrifter

"I lived in a small town for most of my childhood but I wasn't "from there" because my grandparents weren't from there."

– raisinghellwithtrees

"Worked with an older guy, relative of the owner of the business, he was 73. I asked him if he was a local, he said 'no his parents moved here when he was two.'"

– realneil

A Busy Day

"Lived in a town of about 5,000: A woman walked into the DMV on a Friday, saw that there were 3 people ahead of her and left to come back another time when they weren't so busy."

– KenmoreToast

Who Let The Dogs Out?

"My dogs got out while i was working. the police called my niece's elementary school (she was a 5th grader) to get her to round them up and take them back home."

– mediocrelpn

"There was a small kennel behind the police station for runaways. They called us saying they had our dog, and moments later our dog showed up home. He broke out of jail."

– Worried_Place_917

While life in a small town sounds appealing, I don't know if I can ever live in one.

I'm so used to life in big cities, I think it would be quite unnerving to adjust in a neighborhood where everyone literally knows your business.

I would be paranoid.

And I'm sure the same could be said of life in the big city.

Would you consider making the switch to life in a different setting?

Two women laughing
Photo by Dave George on Unsplash

Every now and then, a friend of ours might say something, or we might overhear a complete stranger say something that makes us stop in our tracks.

More often than not, what we can't believe we just heard is something so ridiculous, we can't help but put the person who said it in their place.

Other times, however, what we just heard might have stunned us silent because of how shockingly clever it was.

Resulting in our not wanting to scold or yell at someone, but rather give them a handshake.

Redditor SubmergingOriginal was curious to hear the sharpest and wittiest things they've ever heard, from friends and strangers alike, leading them to ask:

"Enough with the dumbest; what is the wittiest thing you've ever heard someone say?"

Don't Give Me So Much Credit...

'I was on a team at work that was on a project working insane overtime."

"One night after an 80-90 hour week, we were all sitting around the table trying to finish up so we could go home."

"Around 11, my buddy's wife called, dubious about the hours he'd been keeping."

"We heard her through the line - 'are you cheating on me?'"

"Exasperated, he looked at our boss, then replied 'honey, if I was cheating on you, I would have been home by now'."- lionbatcher

Eternal Optimism...

"Asked a blind guy if he'd been blind his whole life."

"He said 'Not yet'."- Feeling_Mode_6465

Free time Isn't The Only Thing He Has On His Hands...

"My brother got a vasectomy and when the doctor was releasing him and giving him instructions (with the nurse listening in), one of the orders was to 'come back and have a follow-up appointment after you’ve ejaculated 30 times'.”

"Without missing a beat my brother asked 'what time do you open tomorrow?'”

"The nurse couldn’t keep it together after hearing that."- UtahUtopia

Awkward Season 8 GIF by The Office Giphy

Double Whammy!

"My pal uses the phrase 'he doesn’t look strong enough to carry information' and it cracks me up every time."

"Calling someone stupid and weak in one fell swoop."- JennyW93

Can't Hide Your DNA...

'Whenever I jokingly insult my mum, she says 'that must be where you get it from'."

"She cracked the code."

"I can never offend her without offending myself."- JennyW93

Self-Sufficient!

"My brother was a line cook at a New Orleans restaurant."

"My mom was in town, staying at a fancy hotel, and he stopped by after work, still wearing his kitchen whites."

"He was reading a newspaper in the lobby waiting for her to come down when the shocked lobby manager sputtered at him, 'MAY I HELP YOU!?!?'

"He answered, 'thanks, but I know how to read',” and went back to his paper."- jobrody

Morph Current Affairs GIF by Aardman Animations Giphy

A Miracle!

"My brother-in-law’s comment."

"The entire family went out for my mother’s 80th birthday and after the meal we all went to a local park, largely occupied by the elderly, to rest."

"My mother needed crutches at this point, and they were resting against her bench."

"My 10-year-old niece, who looked like every starving waif image from Dickens, grabbed the crutches and started hobbling round the park."

"All the OAPs were following her progress with looks of pity until my brother ran up behind her, and kicked away the crutches."

"There was an audible gasp from round the park and then my niece picked the crutches back up and started chasing my brother, clearly intending to hit him."

"In the confused silence my brother-in-law’s voice rang out 'Praise be! She can walk again!'"

"We still think this was the highlight of the birthday celebrations."- DdraigGwyn

Still Legal, Whichever Way You Cut It...

"I picked up my pleasantly tipsy boyfriend from a nightclub."

"We were stopped by the Police for a random breath test."

"They asked me my age, and I said, 33."

"My bf blurted out '33? You told me you were 22'."

"Police just laughed and let me go."- Aggravating-Corgi379

Music Video Police GIF by Andrew W. K. Giphy

A Bit Too On The Nose?

"Business law class in college years ago, talking about the issues that black Americans had before the Civil Rights."

"Amendment, trying to travel through the south with the discrimination so rampant, trying to find restaurants to serve them and decent lodgings."

"My instructor was posing a hypothetical: 'So you pull up out front of this place, you're exhausted from driving for hours, and you see the sign out front says 'Ku Klux Klan Motel'."

"'What would you expect to find there?'"

"Without missing a beat, from the back of the room came this gem: "'Extra sheets in every room?'"- NedsAtomicDB

Not Yet, Anyway...

"I was working with my friend and his dad."

"My friend (26) heard an ice cream truck near where we were working."

"He asked his dad if he could have a couple dollars."

"His dad asked, 'what for?'"

"My friend told his dad that there was an ice cream truck in the neighborhood, and that they were playing music."

"My friends dad told him "'They don't charge anything to listen to the music'."- tatersalad1234567890

Words Escape You In The Literal "Heat" Of The Moment...

"A friend of mine is a teacher and her husband is known for his wit."

"She told this story to him:"

"One day at school a kid took the hall pass and returned reeking like smoke."

"She asked the kid if he’d been smoking and he denied it over and over."

"She was about to send him to the office when she noticed smoke coming from somewhere."

"She told the kid and he realized that he didn’t put his cig out completely and it was burning in his pants pocket."

"The kid noticed and frantically tried to put it out and someone finally poured water on it."

"Her husband sat listening to this with a weird look on his face."

"She asked him what was wrong."

“'What’s wrong???'"

"'This was probably the only chance you’ll have in your life to say literally, ‘liar,liar, pants on fire’ and you missed your chance'."- Luder714

On Fire No GIF by PEEKASSO Giphy

Amazing What You Might Say A Few Drinks In...

"When I went to a renaissance faire once, I went to a beer tent and ordered a Newcastle Brown Ale (seemed the most fitting for the surroundings)."

"The beer wench, without skipping a beat, said, 'Everyone wants a Newcastle - no one wants to remodel!'"- jayhof52

Read The Room People!

"My dad wiped out when skiing down a mountain and lost a ski."

"After a few minutes of hunting for it, he gives up, slings the one remaining ski over a shoulder and starts walking down the mountain in his ski boots."

"About half-way down, another skier stops and goes 'Gee! Did you lose a ski?'"

"My dad instantly replied 'No, I was out for a walk and found one!'"- PeterJoAl

There's a reason your mother always told you to "use your words".

As clever remarks can have a much more lasting effect on people than a push or shove.