Daughters Reveal What They Wish Their Dads Knew About Girls While Growing Up
Being a parent is hard, it can be even harder is you are totally clueless about major aspects of your child's life.
Reddit user @dogidoga asked:
Daughters of reddit, what is something you wish your father knew about girls when you were growing up?
For tons of people out there, the Daddy/Daughter dynamic comes with a few speed bumps. The question was initially posed to the women of Reddit, but a surprising number of men chimed in as well - turning the whole thread into more of a conversation than an endless list. The responses actually turned out pretty enlightening. And, it shows that you can raise a child without the blue or pink stereotypes.
Treat Them Right
The way you treat your wife/girlfriend can teach how I'm supposed to expect men to treat me.
This is why I have changed tactics with my youngest daughter. Instead of being the father that cleaned his gun, or sharpened his knife when the boyfriend came over, I decided that the best way to help my daughter make smarter decisions about boys is to treat her mother with love and respect.
Sure, my wife annoys me at times, but I don't lash out at her, I don't insult her, I have never raised a hand towards her in anger. I raise my voice, but that's more because I am going deaf and don't realize that I am raising my voice, I have never raised it in anger.
We need to teach our daughters how men should be treating women. Not making threats against guys that want to date them. It doesn't look good for us as fathers and teaches them that violence is an acceptable path.
"Boys Don't Like Fat Girls"
How much what he said (or didn't say) mattered. It still bothers me that he didn't tell me I looked pretty either time I was all dressed up as bridesmaid in my friends' weddings and I still remember him saying "boys don't like fat girls," or words to that effect a few times.
Never Embarrass MeGiphy
My dad was a high school teacher that taught at a really good school. As a teen, I wanted to attend the school my dad taught at but he and my mother insisted I attended a different one that was apparently "of a better standard". It wasn't until years later my mother admitted to me that the reason I was put in a different school was because my dad didn't want me to get teased by other students about him or feel embarrassed by him.
I wish my dad knew he could never embarrass me.
Love you daddy. R.I.P
As a teacher I'm at the cusp of the same thing with my oldest. While the majority wouldn't tease her for who her father is as I'm well liked enough by my students, it would affect her social and school life.
I wouldn't be able to let her friends over if they're from the same school because we're required to do a heap of formwork for that. Can't take her friends home with us for sleepovers etc. No parties at my house because I'm a mandatory reporter for underage drinking (that will exist regardless unfortunately for her). Her teachers can just call my staff room right after a lesson if there's a problem.
She's a good kid and I don't want her ability to grow and make friends and engage respectfully with her teachers to be compromised by the fact that Daddy is the crazy science teacher at the other end of the school.
I wish he tried to get to know me after my mom left him.
Gender And Interests
I liked trains. He apparently was really sad when my gender was revealed and I was a girl. He wanted a boy to play trains with and I was the last kid they were going to have. Youngest of 3 girls. I liked trains. My mom would buy toy trains and train movies for me to play with, and I would play with them for hours, but my dad never saw me playing with them because when he got home from work, all I wanted to do was play with my dad, and he didn't typically use toys to play with me. He would just teach me cool stuff, or tell me jokes and stories. He played using his voice. If I had known he wanted to play with trains, we would've had a blast.
As a father of 5 (two girls three boys) I've learned gender bias is generally wrong. My oldest two, girl/boy, were pretty typical but the younger three not so much. My youngest daughter collects hot wheels just like her brothers even if most of them are pink or purple. However she's the first to be in the mud, on the tractor or under the hood of a car with me- Usually asking me to paint a car pink or purple. She's her mother's princess - but she also seeks opportunity on any challenge, any day, and doesn't see the world as pink or blue.
My second son loves Unicorns and pink. My youngest son loves dance class which is 95% female and started his Littlest Pet Shop fascination this year.
Today's chore is to haul firewood from the big stack to the smaller porch stack. Usually about a Rick of wood when we re-stack closer to home in prep for storms later this week. I've got $20 says she earns it alone first before her other two male siblings charged with the task this afternoon... before her double dance classes tonight.
These kids earn cash for every "extra" non-daily chore around here and she earns 7/1 to her brothers on tasks some who consider outside of normal gender bias all the time. 12 yr old wants a new video game and here she is "I could buy it but..."
She's 10, Tiny, Blonde Barbie/Cheerleader, almost flighty at first impression fun loving 1000% typical A-Crowd girl in school but she'd change a college boys tire on the side of a highway faster than he can call Road Service.
It helps to pay attention to what your kids love regardless of gender. I'm old, I don't want to stack firewood anymore LOL.
That when you stop hugging us when we hit puberty, we notice...and it hurts.
We can be angry without it being hormones.
Honestly, as a guy, I will NEVER treat any emotion or opinion as, "She's just hormonal"
You deal with everything with sincerity and reason, because anything else demeans the person you're talking to. It is the other person's responsibility to identify when they are being unreasonable and "just hormonal", if that is indeed the case, and let you know how severe this issue is.
I don't know if this has a word for it, but in the legal-world, this is called 'negotiating in good-faith'.
The Boy You Wanted
That I'm not a boy, and it hurts immensely when you spend more time with the neighbor's son than you own daughter because I'm not the boy you wanted.
I just wanted healthy kids.. and I got that. Now, i did make them do Ninja Warrior stuff and we played war with water guns, so I got to play as well. My youngest likes dolls, so i show her some cool WWE moves with them.
Raise Her Strong
Tell her she's strong and raise her to be it, treat her like she's the strongest person you've ever met. It will make her believe it, and there's no better way you could protect her from the world, when you're not around, than by making her believe in herself. Nothing meant more to me than the day my dad, the strongest man I know, said he admired my strength.
Accept the fact that your daughter will eventually need OBGYN visits, birth control, and will participate in dating and sex at some point. You don't have to be happy about it but please don't shame me or make me feel ashamed that I enjoy being human. I have to leave the room or wait for dad to leave in order to call my OBGYN office and I'm 23 years old.
See, as a dad to a little girl, it's just hard to accept that all of that will happen. Not because of "norms" or sanctity or some antiquated way of thinking - it's just that they're all signs that my little girl isn't so little anymore.
For most dads, it's just hard to accept - not something we willingly fight, but something we willingly don't want to admit to ourselves. Sure there are others that have very antiquated ways of thinking but not all - hell, not the majority.
I dreaded the day my daughter (six years old now) would tell me she had a crush at school, and I jokingly acted like I was not happy at first, but I let her know immediately after that having a crush is normal and acceptable.
I dread the day that she has her first period, but I know I'll start packing pads in her backpack when she turns 10 just in case it happens when she's in school.
I dread the day I have to take her to an OBGYN or fill a script for birth control for her, but I know that day will come. Same as the day she tells me she's sexually active. But I know the one thing I have to do is accept it, as hard as it is when that day comes - because I know as hard as it is for me, it's doubly hard and embarrassing for her.
But if there is anything threads like these that pop up every so often have taught me, is that communication is key - and having open lines of communication with her, where nothing is off limits, will allow her to have a better life and make better life choices (where she can learn from my and my wife's mistakes and observation (wisdom?) without having to make the same mistakes herself).
So for all the fellow dads out there - don't be afraid to communicate with your princesses. And for all the princesses out there, don't be afraid to communicate with your dads - these things are new to us too, and we're always going to be afraid of accepting the fact that the little girl we held in our arms for years is growing up.
Some Vagina To Guard
I'm jealous of all that time and money you spent on my brother and getting to know him as a person. I wish you'd just treat me like a person, not some vagina you felt the need to creepily guard until I got married.
Fathers have a strong instinct to protect the family, especially the women. It's just something you can never truly understand as a woman.
That we notice when he would do some semi-creepy things like stare women down on the street (he was married to my mom for 40 years.) I wish he knew how I internalized a whole bunch of stuff from it. It was creepy on a general level...but to do it in front of your daughter like she doesn't see you just made it worse. Maybe that's lame, but it is genuine.
How to brush hair. When I was little I remember crying every morning before school because my dad would just take the brush and practically rip my scalp off. All he would say was "sorry I don't know how to do girl hair"..ouch.
What's the secret. [6 and 3 yr old girls] Lol. I've tried wet brushes. Detangles. Best I can do is hold it and brush is small sections. About 2 more days away from going and grabbing one of those toy hair dressing heads for practice.
Periods Can Be BadGiphy
How bad periods can be.
My dad thinks that a period is all about blood, but never understands that I go through an awful pain while on my period.
I learned this from my first girl friend (16) and she was blowing chunks in my bathroom sink. I asked what the hell was wrong, and she explained to me her period started. I was blown the away. I ended up going to the store to get Mydol which I learned came in several different types and I bought them all. I don't recall if I had to buy pads, but since we're married now I have done so. Having an older sister who I was close with I knew it caused problems, but I was not aware of the extreme levels of pain that can occur.
Because You're Family
I love my dad, he's really great, but I wish he hadn't compared my relationship with my brother to his relationship with his own brothers. It's awesome that my dad and his brothers got along, but my brother bullied me relentlessly, and having my dad constantly telling us that we were supposed to get along because we were family made me think that something was wrong with me.
Kids aren't action figures. You don't get to mold them to be whatever you want them to be, and you don't get to vicariously live your fantasies through them.
PMS is a real thing that affects some women, but it only occurs for a few days at a very specific point in the menstrual cycle and it's more likely to produce feelings of fatigue/depression/anxiety than feelings of anger/irritability. When you blame all female emotions on PMS, it's both scientifically inaccurate and tremendously invalidating.
Pay attention to the media your kid consumes, and don't dismiss or ridicule girl-oriented media. Girls crave female role models, so make sure your daughter gets exposed to female characters in something other than love interest/princess/celebrity/caretaker roles. Seek out media where female characters are problem solvers, adventurers, and leaders.
Don't act like feminine things are shameful or boring. Don't be the dad who stays out in his car during his daughter's ballet class because sitting with the dance moms is too embarrassing. Don't be the dad who refuses to buy pads/tampons at the grocery store. Don't be the dad who says that women's sports are low action. Don't be the dad who lavishes time and attention on sons while ignoring daughters. Kids are smarter than you think, and they pick up on stuff like that.
F*ck that sh*t. I was in there every week, every single week. I hemmed recital dresses, did hair, etc etc etc. I'd do it again tomorrow. This whole thread is so frustrating to read...no wonder women are always feeling less than enough and second guessing everything. Sorry for the rant but every single person who has posted at feeling less than good enough, I'm sorry for you that your father wasn't up to the job.
Not to use plain rubber bands as hair ties. F*ck that hurt!
Ouch... As a guy with mid-back hair I don't even like the hair ties with the metal bit in them as they catch in my hair.. Rubber bands are... Umm.. No....
Can't Control It
That we cannot control our periods.
I came home from school when I was ten with one of those fevers from the flu where all you do is sleep someone has to wake you up to remind you to eat and drink and use the bathroom.
Well all of this was about 3 months after having my first period and most women at least, I'm sure a few men might too, know how irregular they can be during that. Well while I was asleep I started. And (TMI WARNING but it is important to the story) I tend to bleed somewhere in the Oh My-God-I've-Been-Shot range. Now I wasn't expecting to start obviously so I had no pad on or anything. I'd been asleep for a couple of hours Dad woke me up to give me some more meds and I got up to use the bathroom, in there I quickly realized that I had started as most of the crotch area of my jeans was soaked in blood. A few seconds after that dad started yelling at me from the living room. About half the blue couch cushion is now dark purple.
I can barely stand I'm already very sick and now I'm crying, so he makes me change pants get in the truck drives me to the country store down the road and go in and buy myself pads or tampons. He doesn't want to go buy them because he thinks they are gross and he doesn't want to even be seen accompanying his daughter to buy them.
Now I'm ten, I have no idea what I'm supposed to really buy because I've only had 2 periods at this point and I'd just been using moms pads from home. But we were out of them at home and she went a couple towns over for groceries and other things. I don't have a phone to call her I'm crying I'm bleeding through the second set of pants and I feel so weak I'm holding on to the shelf to stay up. Thankfully a really nice lady who worked there helped me and helped me back to the truck.
He was yelling at me the whole time saying if I was going to start I should have been more prepared and put a pad on or used a tampon or something. How I should have known better than to bleed on the couch and how I should have gotten up and used the bathroom when I felt the bleeding. Mom got home and absolutely tore him a new one and gave him some menstruation knowledge while she was at it.
You found me! Let me know here.
The Most Interesting Stories People Have Ever Learned About Their Ancestors
When it comes to our family histories, it seems like there are two kinds of people: those who have very little access to family documents and history, and those who know practically everything there is to know about what each of their family members has done since the dawn of time.
But even for those who seem to know everything, all families have their share of secrets.
And those secrets or more over-the-top stories can really enrich our understanding and appreciation of our families.
Redditor Careless_Put_4770 asked:
"What is the most interesting story you have of an ancestor (past your parent's generation)?"
A Dark Past
"The Uncle of my grandfather was part of Hitler's personal SS Corps."
"I have a friend whose uncle of a grandfather was a bodyguard of Hermann Göring."
"He lost both his legs after he messed up and was sent to the Russian front as punishment, but still praised Hitler and the Nazis until he died."
"I also have an SS grandfather who dug up human remains at the Swiss border in 1941."
"Some general advice here: Don't ask your German friends about their family history. You're gonna have a bad time."
Ranch Hand for Theodore Roosevelt
"I don’t know the date’s exactly off the top of my head but they’re written down at home."
"My Great Grandfather (Grandma's dad) was born in the Black Hills Germany. He allegedly killed a German officer and went on the lam to the United States."
"He worked as a ranch hand for Theodore Roosevelt for some years before he married my Great Grandma. He was gifted a buffalo rifle from Roosevelt which was taken by one of grandmas brothers after their dad died."
For the Woman He Loves
"My great grandfather killed my great grandmother's suitor and kidnapped her a night before her wedding."
"Apparently in the region of South India I'm from, women used to pick their future husband off a lineup of men wishing to marry her."
"My great grandfather was rejected by my great grandmother, and so he went about executing the dude chosen by her and kidnapping her, which apparently was seen as an extremely macho move."
"My Grandfather was born in 1896 so the time period would've been around 1860-1880."
An Impressive Gift
"My great-grandfather lost one of his arms during WW1, and right after the war, he decided to ask my great-grandmother to marry him."
"To show her how much he loved her, he decided to give her a really nice pair of shoes from a good shoemaker who lived in the countryside, and cars were not that common at the time."
"He took his bike and rode 70 kilometers (43 miles) to the closest big city to get her a really nice pair of shoes and rode 70 kilometers back with the box on his lap to give it to her. WITH ONLY ONE ARM."
"Pretty romantic, but that's not the end of the story."
"The shoemaker f**ked up big time and gave him two left shoes by accident, so my great-grandpa took his bike the next day, and did the 70 kilometers back and forth to exchange one of the shoes."
"And they lived happily married ever after."
"Every time I tell the story to someone married, they look at their husband with disdain, which I find pretty funny (I never told the story to any of my girlfriends, though)."
"If you trace my family line back far enough you get to Norwegian royalty. It's a second son of a third son, kind of thing."
A Supportive Family
"I come from a VERY conservative family, and when I realized I was gay, it terrified me to come out. I came out to my mom and she didn’t have an easy time handling it, but within 48 hours, she was my best friend and a strong advocate."
"The turnaround was very strange. She also told me to never be scared to tell anyone in the family, which again seemed like being set up for failure. But it really wasn’t. Everyone was super supportive and kind and very defensive of me."
"For years I wondered why and then one day I was at a family do with my grandmother and her four sisters, the Matriarchs of each branch of the family and the five most terrifying but loving women you ever met."
"They pulled me aside and we’re VERY interested in how I was doing if anyone in the family had been mean to me, and if anyone had given me a hard time about being 'special' as they called it."
"I said no, surprisingly everyone in the family had been lovely. They didn’t ask any more questions but told me to come to them if anyone was being mean."
"This was so overwhelming to see these elderly, super-conservative women being so supportive, so I cornered my mom and demanded to know why they were so nice."
"Then my mom told me about Ravi. Ravi was a beautiful, charismatic, loving, kind, sweet teenager who was my grandmother and her sisters' best friend in the 1940s. He was allowed to hang out with the women because he was 'not a threat' (he was super gay but you didn’t talk about it)."
"My gran and her sisters absolutely adored Ravi, until one day his personality changed. He became dark and withdrawn. Eventually, he killed himself."
"My gran and her sisters were devastated and didn’t know why, until they found out that Ravi had fallen in love with a boy and his parents had figured out. Ravi’s parents destroyed him psychologically through isolation, berating and eventually questionable medical interventions. Ravi’s soul was broken so he took his life."
"My grand and her sisters never ever forgave their community or Ravi’s parents for what they did to him, so when my mother called my grandmother weeping and screaming that I was gay, my grandmother came down on her like a ton of bricks with all the power and might that she could muster. She told my mother that if I was ever treated differently, If I was ever isolated or bullied by a member of the family, they would have to face the consequences of dealing with grandmother and her sisters."
"Her sisters also told all their children to treat me with respect and love, all without me knowing, because they never wanted anyone to go through what their best most loved male friend had all those years ago."
"I owe my happiness to that man, fly free my brother, wherever you are."
Such a Punch Line
"My Great-Grandmother had two suitors: a man in America and a man in Manchester, UK."
"The guy in America bought her a ticket to cross the Atlantic and be with him, and she was set to go, but at the last minute, the guy in England proclaimed his love and won her over."
"And that’s how my great-grandparents got together, as opposed to my great-grandmother dying on The Titanic."
A Pirate's Life for Me
"My great great great great grandfather was abducted by pirates as a boy and raised as one… in Canada. They were river brigands. My mom has a book on him."
"Her parents were from Czechoslovakian and Germany though, so I’m not sure how that happened. I always told people I was part pirate, though."
A Wild Story
"Great-great-great-great-great-great grandpa Andrew threw rocks through his landlord's windows in Cork, jumped onto the next ship to Canada, started a farm on the Ottawa River, changed his surname to MacDonald so people would think he was Scottish, and imprisoned the tax collector in his cellar when they came to demand land taxes from him."
"My grandad was an engineer for the British army in Egypt during World War Two."
"He and a buddy got drunk one time and slept in this small town, when they awoke they discovered the Germans had taken over the town. So they evaded capture and discovered an old plane that required maintenance, and the two ended up repairing the plane and flew it over German lines and into Allied territory."
Wild, Wild West
"One of my ancestors was Curly Bill Brocious, the leader of the infamous Cowboys gang which fought against the Earps in and around Tombstone Arizona in the 1870s/80s."
"He was killed by Wyatt Earp himself by a shotgun blast that reportedly tore him in two."
"My grandma (mother's side) was abandoned in an orphanage by my great-grandmother because she wanted to run off and marry another man, and he would not take her children. So my great grandfather, who was in the army during WW1, came to see them and promised to come back after the next battle. It was the somme, he died."
"The same grandmother did not know how old she was, by the time she obtained a copy of her birth certificate later in life, she found out she was a year older than she thought she was."
"My Dad's Grandfather was an advertising artist, semi-famous at the time, there is an original of his passed down in our family, it is with my dad's oldest brother now. It is of a boy running down a famous road in my northern city past a famous theatre still being used to this day."
The Consequences of Love
"One of my great-grandmother’s grandma was an aristocrat. She fell in love with a peasant boy working on their lands. Her father told her he would disown her if she wanted to be with that boy. So one dark night the boy got my grandma escaped from their home and they ran away. Needless to say, she was disowned."
"And that’s the story of why I have to work now, instead of just seeing my monthly allowance show up on my bank account."
"Omnia vincit amor."
Connections, Connections Everywhere
"My mom and my stepdad share an ancestor about four generations back."
"Also somewhere in this range, my great-[ex?]-grandma received a letter from her brother that had left Austria."
"He said, 'Come to America. If not for your sake, then for your children's sake.'"
" She talked her husband into it, they moved to the Midwest, and several generations later I was born."
"I'm 34 but my paternal grandfather was born in 1895. He got shot through both knees sideways in Belgium during World War I then had to limp miles to safety... Sounds impossible but I have a newspaper article about it!"
"His brother also survived WWI, only to die in the Spanish flu pandemic. Sadly my grandfather died quite a while before I was born."
It's amazing how far back some of our families go and how far back some families are able to trace their family's history. Knowing a little more about what our family has done can really tell us where we have been, so we can decide where we will go next.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
At least when it comes to entertainment, we're all taught to believe that being kind will take you far and that the good guy always wins over the villain.
But even in movies and TV shows, sometimes that isn't true anymore, and that can make a far more compelling story.
Note: there are massive spoilers below. You have been warned.
Redditor careater asked:
"What is a good 'the bad guy wins' movie?"
Man on Fire
"Man on Fire."
"'Nightcrawler,' definitely. Only a few people mentioned it in this thread, which I find surprising. It fits the definition of the 'bad guy winning' perfectly and it is also a really good movie."
"'Valkyrie.' Crazy to think that Hollywood didn’t have to embellish much because those events actually happened in real life."
"Eastwood's character is the bad guy. He killed women and children and everything that walked or crawled. He was a hired vigilante."
"Little Bill was the law. But he was also a belligerent a-hole who beat a man to death and let another get away with cutting up a woman’s face because she was a w**re. He got what was coming whether he deserved it or not."
"It still baffles me that some people don't get that the humans are the bad guys. Neil Patrick Harris becomes more and more Nazified over the course of the movie until he's just wearing an SS uniform in the last scene."
"At no point is there any evidence to the audience (unless presented by a newscast of a fascist regime) that the bugs are the aggressors."
"No fighting takes place on human territory."
"There is no clear cause for the bugs to throw a rock at the earth."
"The bugs did nothing wrong."
"Serious question for anyone who's seen that movie more recently: did Thanos have a 50% chance of wiping himself out of existence when he did the snap?"
"Yes, and this was confirmed by the Russo Brothers in a Q&A as well. That's why he seems surprised and gives a little smirk before teleporting away after the snap; he sees himself being exempted as proof that he was doing the right thing."
"Basically ALL the 'Halloween' movies. Michael wins every single time except for 'Halloween Ends,' which is a real absolute first, to be honest."
"First runner-up: 'The Collector.'"
"Second runner-up: every single 'Saw' movie."
"'Midsommar' if you treat the cult as the bad guy."
"The cult is definitely the villain of the story."
X-Men: First Class
"X-men: First Class (2011)."
"'I prefer... Magneto" what follows is the most bada** villain theme since imperial march."
"'I've been at the mercy of men just following orders. NEVER AGAIN.'"
"Magneto is the deuteragonist of the film."
"Shaw is the Bad Guy. And he gets a penny for his thoughts (a coin through his head)."
Lad Abiding Citizen
"Depending on your perspective, 'Law Abiding Citizen.'"
"I can’t stand watching that movie. Every time I hope Gerard Butler will win, and Jamie Foxx catches him every d**n time…"
"Such a bulls**t ending. It's like they passed out of having Gerard Butler's character win, like they couldn't show a man with 10 years of planning pull off his vengeance plan against the justice system in case the audience got ideas."
"It seemed like a case of Jamie Foxx wouldn't allow them to make his character 'lose', but this is a myth apparently. It's still s**t, though."
"Yeah, it p**ses me off that Butler's character loses."
"The 'good guys' only won because they broke the law. The cop and the lawyer didn't get a warrant, and it was literally shrugged away as they broke into and entered the garage. If they were actually sticking to the rules they espoused, as they should have, Butler's character would have gotten away with it."
"I know, I know... The good guys have to win, Butler's character was a murderous psychopath, ends justify the means, etc. But I think the ending was a copout."
"Well done movie, absolutely hated it and will never watch it again. Made me so d**n mad, but I understand it did exactly what it was meant to."
"A very interesting movie. The ending... whew!"
"The scream I scrumpt when she said, 'Baby, you just trapped yourself!'"
"'Fallen.' That movie was f**king awesome, great ending."
"Did I ever tell you about the time I almost died?"
"Now remember, I told you I was going to tell you the story of the time I ALMOST died."
"Tiii-i-i-ime... is on my side. Yes, it is..."
Cabin in the Woods
"'Cabin in the Woods.'"
"Well, the bad guys actually lose, but the world ends as a result."
"It's one of my favorite twists on a horror movie ever."
"Are they really the bad guys though? Sure, they act like a**holes about killing people, but it’s kind of important that they do it."
"The gods they are trying to appease, it’s movie audiences like you and me. We are the actual bad guys."
"If what we expect to see doesn’t happen, like a virgin sacrificial ritual, we will destroy the movie at the box office. That’s the big hand you see at the end."
"So ... our nostalgia and need for cliches is the bad guy? We're the reason Hollywood only does remakes now?"
"F**k... that's darker than I realized."
"This should be top."
"'Infinity War' and 'Empire Strikes Back' are not the ending of the story, and as we know, the bad guy eventually loses."
"This is one of the only movies where the bad guy wins, and that's it, the end. He doesn't die and win like in 'Se7en.' There's no sequel to make right the wrong. The baddies just f**king trick the protagonist big time and win."
"Leaves you feeling almost angry, stunned even."
Everyone can appreciate a happy ending, but these movies go to show that a movie can still be great without the good guy coming out on top.
In fact, it might even make these movies all the move impactful and memorable.
When people feel as if they've been wronged, their initial instinct is to retaliate.
Getting revenge is a negative impulse in which the victim feels they can only move on from the situation only after inflicting a similar level of emotional or physical pain or embarassment.
That's not everyone's style, however, and it's not up to us to stoop to the lowest common denominator and give in to our darkest urges to seek justice.
But if you take a moment and consider other alternatives, certain forms of revenge can be sweet.
These were explored when Redditor Fronzie7 quoted a famous music icon to ask:
"Frank Sinatra said, 'The best revenge is massive success' What's a real-life example of this?"
Everyone loves a good Hollywood ending.
You Know You've Made It When You're On A Lunchbox
"Michael J.Fox has a great story about when he started out. Some big wheel at the network didn't like him for the role of Alex P. Keaton on Family Ties. He was too short, not cute, not heart throb enough, you're never going to see his face on a lunch box. But the producer cast him anyway and the show shot to number one and stayed there."
"Fox sent him a Family Ties lunch box with his face on it and then Back to the Future 1,2,3 lunch boxes."
A Rocky Start To An Amazing Career
"Sylvester Stallone as well. Casting agents told him he was too stupid looking and he'd only get small roles as the thug who got beaten up. He said he literally went to every casting agent in NYC and got rejected by all of them."
"Even after he wrote Rocky and found producers, they didn't want him to star in it."
The Dreamgirl Who Never Stopped Dreaming
"Jennifer Hudson lost American Idol and became more successful than the winner."
"She is a recent EGOT winner and the youngest woman to do it. 7th Place looks fantastic on her."
Against all odds, the end result was a victory for these accomplished individuals.
Home Surveillance Home Run
"The guy who invented Ring cameras went on Shark Tank and was rejected by everyone. They all thought it would fail….we’ll you know the rest."
"He went back on Shark Tank after that, but this time as one of the sharks."
The Skies The Limit
"Ron McNair had the police called on him when he was little because he was black and reading in a library. He grew up to be an astronaut and the library he was kicked out of was later named after him."
"For those who may not be familiar with his name; he was one of the Challenger crew members on January 28, 1986."
Emerged From The Shallow
"When Lady GaGa was in college, some of her classmates had a Facebook group called 'Stefani Germanotta, you'll never be famous.'"
"Pretty sure she proved them wrong."
Now these are smart business moves.
Recipe For Success
"Erin French, chef-owner of restaurant The Lost Kitchen in rural Maine."
"Co-owned a restaurant in the town of Belfast with her husband; a very tumultuous relationship ended with him changing the locks on the building with all of her equipment inside."
"She licked her wounds, leased space in an old mill building in her tiny hometown of Freedom, and built from the ground one of the best restaurants in the country, with a coveted reservation that is fabled for its difficulty to get a table. Has her own multi-season documentary on TV and is absolutely killing it in the culinary world now."
A Toy Story
"George Lucas got the ownership of the toy rights to star wars because they don’t think it would be successful. He made an absolute killing on those."
"Not just the toy rights, he got the entire IP in exchange for waiving is salary."
Lamborghini Origin Story
"Italian industrialist, builder of tractors, made a mint out of it and rewarded himself with a new Ferrari."
"Ferrari broke down. Needed a new clutch. Wealthy industrialist waited patiently for his new clutch to arrive, and after many weeks it finally showed up - same clutch he was putting in his tractors, more than twice the price."
"A little bit annoyed at this, he rang Ferrari to complain. They told him 'go back to building tractors, leave supercars to us.'"
"And Lamborghini was born..."
"Sony and Nintendo were working on a console together before the N64 came out, intending to utilize Nintendo's gaming hardware combined with Sony's sound tech to create games with more immersive sound capabilities than have been seen before. Partway through development and immediately following Sony's announcement of their partnership, Nintendo backed out of the deal, which if you're not aware of Japanese business etiquette, is kind of a d*ck move."
"Nintendo backed out to work with Philips to put Nintendo games on the CDi, which resulted in the worst-received Nintendo games of all time."
"Sony, out of spite, went on to make the PlayStation, one of the best-selling consoles in gaming history, and cement themselves as a massive player in the console wars to this day."
Be Kind And Rewind
"Blockbuster laughed baby Netflix out of the room with their idea. Then later, grown-up Netflix killed blockbuster."
"Best thing for Netflix, really. Blockbuster would have driven themselves and the Netflix rent model out of business through mismanagement."
"I don't know about you, but I can't live in a world without Voltron: Legendary Defender."
So what's the moral of the story?
Basically, always be kind and never make anyone feel less than they deserve. You never know what the future brings, and you putting down someone for your own fleeting gain will come back to haunt you.
Also, remember that karma works in mysterious ways.
Danger comes in many forms.
Treacherous roads and weather, dubious substances, spoiled or undercooked food, and even people.
Yes, sometimes even being near, or even knowing of certain people, can result in finding yourself in a dangerous situation.
As they may pressure you to take part in something which puts your health and safety at risk, or their behavior is known to have had both physical and emotional consequences on others.
Many try to keep their distance from these people, for others doing so sadly just isn't possible.
"Who is undoubtedly the most dangerous person you know?"
How Did She Even Get a License?
"My mom has totaled around 5 cars."
"She's a terrible driver, shouldn't even be on the road."
"If she's driving I'll say "'ll take my car and meet you there'."- uncultured_swine2099
But Lives To Tell The Tale...
"My dad eats mushrooms from his backyard, and hoses out his toaster and hangs it by the cord on the washing line to dry."- misspoopyloopy
An Unfortunate Addition To The Family
"He’s a chronic alcoholic with a narcissistic personality and violent tendencies."
"He has assaulted each of his siblings."
"He’s been enabled and taught to be a victim his whole life."
"I’m terrified of him, but he’s someone you never want to show fear or weakness."- Consistent-Common196
How Did She Even Make It That Far?
"A nurse I have worked with once."
"She completely stepped over boundaries, disconnected a picc line without informing me (the picc trained nurse), didn't wear gloves or wash her hands."
"Couldn't take criticism or couldn't be taught about the error of her clinical judgement."
"Instead shouted at myself, the patient and other staff."
"Didn't come back so she's probably moved on to another area."
"That was her last go at palliative chemo to give her some more months of quality time with her children."
"The picc blocked."
"They didn't give her another one."
"That nurse contributed to that woman having less time with her family."
"I will never forgive her."- DragonmamaGlasgow
The Older We Get, It's Important To Know Our Limits
"My grandad, when he was alive."
"He was a sweet, humble old man who loved gardening but oh my god I do not know who allowed him to keep driving."
"He was 84 with arthritis, plus he was deaf and almost blind, but he insisted on still driving."
"One time he parked his car on a tram track with my sister inside it."
"He is the sole reason I think there should be an age limit on driving licenses."- molwalk
Don't Underestimate What Those Stubby Little Hands Can Do...
"Babies in that stage of crawling and almost walking."
"Those nutcases try to eat electricity."- Aromatic-Armadillo98
You Think You Know Somebody...
"My parents moved into a neighborhood with a truck driver as a neighbor."
"When they finally met him (he drove ALL the time), they found out his son had been in jail/prison on and off since he was a minor."
"Trucker dude was super rough around the edges, but had acquired quite a bit of wealth over his career of hard work."
"My parents started having him over for dinners and became pretty good friends."
"He didn't like to talk about his son and got realllllly grumpy when his name came up."
"Dad wasn't the (direct) problem."
"His son got released from prison and came back home on a 'last chance' deal with his dad."
"He was in rehab."
"He was helpful and helping my parents with projects and chores."
"They started trusting the guy."
"He seemed like things were going well in his life for once."
"I even met the f*ck up and agreed he was a nice kid with a bad life (he was older than me and I still say kid lol)."
"Dad called my parent and told them he had been missing for 2 nights and that's not a good sign."
"Turns out he went on a bender..."
"He started calling my parents with burner phones asking if he could come over."
"The answer was a hard no."
"He then escalated to he was gonna 'roll up with his crew and take their sh*t while they slept'."
"That escalated things even more."
"He got caught the next day at a trap house and arrested with an illegal handgun."
"F*cker was locked in for 7 years and released on good behavior."
"Nobody knows where he is at, his dad died a few years back."
"They think they saw him multiple time sitting outside of his old house late at night."
"That's the scariest person I know."
"My parents did nothing but feed him and offer advice when he needed it."
"Just a nice old couple."
"Unpredictable people that flip on a switch scare me."- Remz_Gaming
What He Can't Tell Them Says It All...
"My BILs best friend who works for the government."
"He’s not allowed to tell us what he does and all we know he leaves for a couple of weeks at a time every few months, speaks several languages and looks like he’s cut out of wood."
"There was one time where he came over to a party I was having and I’d set up some VR games for people to try."
"There was a game where zombies attack you from all sides and it’s all about keeping your head on a swivel and headshots."
"I don’t remember the specifics, but none of us had gotten past level 2 or 3."
"He made it to something like 30 without breaking a sweat."
"It was his first time playing that game and he hasn’t games since SNES days."
"Everyone that saw him play/move that day agrees he’s probably not working in IT."
"I’ve never asked him what he does, I just heard 'he can’t talk about it' so I don’t bring it up."
"I’m not saying he’s Jason Bourne."
"All I know is that he was in the army and I think I remember someone mentioning he went to Ranger school."
"His job sends him all over the world. In the time that I’ve known him (about 5 years), he’s lived in the UK, Philippines and Africa."
"This one is from a completely personal point of view, but he definitely has a 'I’m not going to f*ck with that guy' vibe."
"He’s a super nice guy that’s never shown an ounce of aggression, but I think if you asked him during dinner how many people are in the booth 3 tables over, he’s be able to tell you without looking."- LocalArea52Man
Never Judge Based Off First Impressions
"My grandfather, wonderful, kind and caring man."
"Won a military cross for exceptional bravery for taking out 2 machine gun nests in ww2."
"He ran out of ammo and killed multiple enemies with a shovel by hand."
"Was quiet, not boastful but towards the end of his life talked about how easy it became to kill in the war and he remembered the sound of an enemies head coming off when he hit him with a shovel."
"Made me think how quiet and unassuming he was but when necessary he was able to do that."- wallabyfan76
Some people simply live for danger, and go out of their way to put themselves in dangerous situations.
But no one should ever feel unsafe, simply by being around, or even knowing someone.
Thankfully, even if you think you are all alone, there are always people out there who will stand up and protect you, without a second thought.