It'd be too easy to write off everyone as stupid. Obviously, there are incredibly intelligent, critically-minded people in the world who are a pleasure to talk to, to gain insight, and to learn from. However, as we're all aware, not everyone is like this and there are some real dummies out there.
Just take a gander at the encounters below and count your blessings you haven't met anyone this stupid.
Reddit user, u/mememansand, wanted to know the dumbest of the dumb when they asked:
What's the most outright stupid thing somebody has said to you?
Isn't Space Wonderful?
Giphy"Did you know the moon isn't the back of the sun"
From a 30ish year old woman who was also an assistant manager of where I worked at the time.
Yeah. Sure.
"You can't date a boy if you're bisexual, that would make you gay!"
Uhm, yeah sure.
Just Find Better Friends
New York came before York,
same person said Jackie chan is Asian not Chinese.
Also have been asked "what language do you speak in England"
... yes I am British and schooled in the US
When Someone Denies Video Proof, You Can't Win
When I was a kid, we had this babysitter/nanny. Because her house was closer to the school than ours and she was kind of an old lady, we often went to her house after school rather than go home because it was easier. Her husband was retired, taught me and my siblings to play chess, sometimes made pancakes, fixed our bikes, really nice setting.
And then one day, we were talking about how this astronaut came home, André Kuipers. And I said something about how your muscles get weaker after spending years and years in a zero gravity environment because you arent using them as actively. He denied every single word. No, not because he thought they had artificial gravity, he didn't believe unused muscles get weaker. Despite video images of the astronaut after returning home, sitting in one of those wheelchairs that also support your head. He just kept repeating "no thats not true" without and kind of explanation of why he thought so.
And then when I said he heart is a muscle too he got angry and stormed out. Still don't know why.
The Only Language That Matters Is American!
Do you speak Mexican ?
This has the same energy as, "Oh you're Japanese? Ni hao!"
It's As If You Were Born Here
I got told once that I seemed like I was born in the United States and that my English was almost perfect. And she was very sure that I was one of the "good ones"
Plot twist: I'm Salvadoran, and I was born in the United States and my majors are criminal justice and accounting. English is my first language
His Last Name Was Francesca?
In my grade 10 history class, the girl who sat next to me turned to me and asked "What was Hitler's last name?"
I thought she was just kidding so I laughed. She kept staring at me waiting for an answer.
"Oh, you're seriously asking."
kerensavanitas16Guess He's An "Ex" For A Reason
An ex boyfriend was livid that I was spending a lot of time with my best friend from high school, who is a gay man. ExBF explained that all penises are really straight, but it's the brain that tells someone they're gay.
Also, that gay men who are nice to women can't possibly really be gay, since they have no use for women.
Sigh, Good Night Dad. Just, Good Night.
Last night my dad (who got all of this information from facebook) told me:
When the "vaccine" comes ot, dont get it. Trump and gates developed 'the current pandemic' to get people to buy the vaccine. But inside the vaccine is a skew number that will transmit your information, like your name, location, and what car you drive, ect, to the authorities. Thats why Gates invented 5G, cause the skew number will run off that
Me: W-Wha..... Ya know, its not even worth arguing, night dad
I really wish i was joking
That's Not...That's Not How That Works.
Giphy"How aren't there more twins? Do pregnant women just stop banging?"
No, No The Science Checks Out On That One
Before the quarantine, when the pandemic wasn't very severe where I live, someone told me they wouldn't get the virus because they don't have an immune system. According to them, only people with immune systems could get the virus.
Get This Man A Ruler
When asked how tall he was he said "5 feet and 12 inches."
( For those of you in countries that use sensible measurement systems, this is kind of like saying "1 meter and 100 centimeters")
Once when asked how long something would take, he said "20 minutes... 15 at the most."
Get This Man A Biology Book
A 20-something gamer dude I game online with once told me that women urinate out of their vaginas. He kept saying "What!?" while I laughed myself to death.
Maybe The Answer Is More Obvious Than You Might Think
This is more a case of running stupidity than an instance of it:
My college roommate developed a habit of drinking at least 4 PBRs a day, or triple that plus shots if she was partying. After about 6 months of this, her stomach was (not surprisingly) always f-cked up. Never had a solid sh-t.
She spent another 2 months self diagnosing and cutting gluten and dairy from her diet, with no success. (Switched from PBR to all-day margaritas.) Went to doctors, no success. I eventually asked her if she thought her alcohol intake could be upsetting her stomach and she just stared at the ceiling for 10sec and matter-o-factly said "No."
Today (3yrs later) she still claims to have intolerance to lactose and gluten, but eats pizza once a week. Still has daily margs. She's learned to live with "her intolerances."
Good. So Long As That Line Has Been Made Exceptionally Clear
My friend who I worked with and is ~40 thinks dinosaurs are fake. He also went on a legitimate "Squach-hunt" a few years back.
I'm trying to be clear here:
Dinosaur fossils are part of the museum/geologist agenda. Big Foot and Sasquatch are a present-day threat.
iBelieveInSpaceThere's Two Here, And They're Both EQUALLY Dumb
"All bad stuff happen on Friday the 13th. 9/11 happened on Friday the 13th.."
"How much is 16-16?"
Harrison Ford Is irradiating our testicles with microwave transmissions!
Vaccines are the mark of the beast and Bill Gates is trying to inject microchips in people. Or my neighbor who says sea level rise isn't real because ice occupies more volume than water, as if all the ice is currently in the water
Born Is Born Is Born
Someone who will remain unidentified said that I didn't really give birth to my firstborn because c sections don't count, they're the easy way out.
It was an emergency c section because the umbilical cord was getting compressed with every push, after a 56 hour labour with inducing and back labour. 12 years later, the scar still aches if I exercise and my menstrual cramps focus along the scar line. Right. The easy way.
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There are rules in life where people are expected to just know how to operate without being told.
For instance, if someone falls down... help them.
When you like a sweater in a store... get money to buy it.
Just leaving with it won't go over well.
And there are more rules, or guidelines to adhere to...
Redditor christygl7 wanted to hear about what is expected in people's homes without words, so they asked:
"What's an unwritten rule in your household?"
If you have to pee... lift the seat cover.
The people in Port Authority always miss that one.
Routine
Cleaning Chores GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy"Either my wife or I can do any chore when noticed. We thank each other for routine chores as we appreciate each other."
cwsjr2323
"That’s how my fiancée and I handle chores. Whoever’s around when the core needs to be done does the chore, typically. I find she does more regular cleaning of the whole apartment while I do more dishes and cooking."
radtech91
Trashed
"Replacing the trash bag IS PART OF taking out the trash."
UndiagnosedReptard
"Similar to this, in my house, the rule is if the toilet paper ended on your turn (or there’s barely enough for the next person) then it is your job to procure the next roll and put it in the bathroom. It is NOT acceptable to let it run out for the next person."
wavesnfreckles
"We have extra stored in every bathroom. I make sure of it. However, if it runs low/out on the roll, my wife will 100% of the time take the new roll and set it on top of the empty tube on the spindle, refusing to replace it. I actually called her over and shamed her into changing it in front of me the other night (not in an abusive way - we were both laughing about it)."
on_the_nightshift
Finder's Keepers
"If you find money in the laundry while you are doing the laundry, it's yours."
Rich1926
"Yep. My boyfriend learned that lesson the hard way when we first started living together. He had a bad habit of just crumpling up bills in a big wad in his pocket, usually just ones, but sometimes he accidentally leaves a twenty in there. I tipped myself the twenty. It took him a couple of days of trying to figure out where it went before I took pity on him and told him."
"He now both turns out his pockets and washes his own clothes. I still find the occasional single dollar in the dryer."
Head_Razzmatazz7174
Dropped something?
"If food is dropped on the floor it becomes the property of the dog. The dog knew this rule before we did."
Altruistic-Bit-9766
"That was one of the hardest things after our family dog died. Dropped something? Who cares! Riley will get it. But then he didn’t."
"Also, I don’t live at home anymore but coming home to him barking and crying out of excitement and greeting me always made my day and I looked forward to it every time I opened the door and could hear him wiggling in excitement on the side hahaha. It’s a little less exciting coming home now."
ohno807
Obligations...
Water Stay GIF by Kinda FunnyGiphy"If the water you take from the Brita pitcher leaves what’s left below a certain line, you are obligated to refill the pitcher on penalty of death."
halcyon3608
If you stay in my home and don't refill the Brita pitcher...
I'm setting your hair on fire at 3 AM!!!
Flushed
Go Away Pink GIF by HacklockGiphy"Check the toilet after you flush."
NANNYNEGLEY
"This. My brother-in-law never does this. It's annoying and disgusting! You don't want to clean up after yourself because you think it's gross? How do you think it makes me feel to clean up after you?"
purplestarsinthesky
WAKE UP!
"Wake someone up if their alarm goes off. It's a pretty weird one but setting up alarms is a conscious and deliberate decision for all of us and you want to wake up when it goes off, so we just help each other out."
DonMartiniMacaroni
"I'll do this a few times, but my roommate needs to learn not to hit snooze because he's taught his body that alarms don't need to be woken up to. I don't wake him up anymore. He started waking up to them."
stumblinbear
"I’ll wake them up because it annoys me when people snooze especially if I’m next to them in the bed and I don’t have to get up."
chill90ies
No Exceptions!
"Shoes off at the door. No exceptions."
Next-Dark-4975"
"Shoes-on people must not be using the same public bathrooms that I do. 100% of them have a lake of dirty urine in front of the urinal. They must also be amazing at finding two urine-free spots that are shoe-sized on the shores of said lake. It’s fine if they want to bring that into their homes. It’s not allowed in mine, though."
Bmadray
Table Manners
"No tech at the table."
"Even with a teenage daughter this has proved eerily easy; we all love food though!!"
"Also murder is out of the question, it is non-negotiable. If any of us kills another then they are outlawed in the true sense."
"Other than this, we are pretty cool."
Dante2005
Woof
Well Done Applause GIF by MOODMANGiphy"Let the dog out to go potty before you use the restroom. (Seriously, the dog is asking to go out and you think she can wait while you take a 30-minute poop first? Not cool.)"
InfiniteBackspace
Always let the dogs go first.
If you wait, you won't like the surprise they leave!
Sometimes we look at a product and think "who would buy that, and why?"
For me the "Flowbee" home haircutting tool comes to mind. If you're unfamiliar, it's a shaver you attached to your vacuum cleaner so you hair was pulled past cutting blades.
It was sold on late night infomercials in the 1990s.
Who wouldn't want to style their hair like this?
As fabulous as that looks, results did vary with most veering toward "yikes!" yet by 2000 the company reported 2 million were sold.
And *surprise* you can still buy one—for about $150.
It seems no matter how bad a product is, someone will buy it.
