Suddenly ceasing all forms of communication with someone is colloquially known as ghosting.
Anyone committing the practice says a lot about their character and are instantly pegged as someone who has no regard for people's feelings.
And while we default to criticizing the individual – whether they are a coworker, friend, or even a romantic interest – have you ever wondered if there is ever a valid excuse for their actions?
Curious to hear about the other perspective, Redditor are_we_human_ asked:
"People who have ghosted friends permanently: Why did you do it?"
When Talking Does Not Help
These people thought the individual did not need an explanation for slipping out.
Tired Conversations
"When I felt like I had to walk on eggshells around them constantly. Like it felt like no matter what I said, it was always the wrong thing. I'd be asked for my honest opinion on something and no matter how I answered it was the wrong thing. Or even if I did so much as say 'I legitimately don't have any input for this, it's out of my wheelhouse', well…wrong answer."
"It got to the point where I got tired of just feeling like no matter what I said it was wrong and I just let the conversation die and dead it has been for a year or so."
– We1tfunk
Waiting To Make A Move
"I've technically done this by going 'okay, I'm always initiating the conversation, so now I'm going to let them message me first' and then never hearing from them again."
Your Turn
"Yeah, I've done this. The whole 'ok, your turn to take the lead' thing and they never contacted me again. When you couple it with the realization that the only time they were contacting you was to ask for a favor, you realize where things really stood."
– tah4349
Detoxing
For people wanting to cut off negative relationships, ghosting was the only solution.
Distancing From Troubled Relationships
"Because I found out he was verbally abusing his child and physically abusing his wife. Tried to do more for the wife and child but she went and denied it all when social services got involved. Sadly they are still together and he is still a drunk who hasn't changed."
"At that point I had to pull my family away from that and move on with life."
"Was my best friend since childhood and I never knew any of it all that time. 🤦♂️"
No Time For Fake Drama
"She kept lying to me. Really stupid small and mainly harmless lies - concerts she'd gone to, how many times she took her driving test, people she's dated. It's like she would forget that we'd been besties since we were 14 and were now in our 20's so I knew who she'd dated, concerts and driving test etc."
"She tried to get back in touch 5yrs later, messaging my sister and other school friends on FB saying she had desperately been trying to get in touch with me. She hadn't. I still lived in the same house, had the same mobile number and email etc"
"Eventually I got in touch with her and asked her to meet for coffee. Although it was lovely to see her and I genuinely missed her as we had some of the best times of our young lives together it became clear pretty quickly that she was still a liar but they had got bigger. Now she was saying her sister had attempted suicide and her daughter was nearly killed by a bus. I got really angry at her for telling such sh**ty lies like this which she tried to deny she was until I started asking her for details of when, where and how these things happened and she stumbled."
"I walked away and haven't heard from her since and I'm relieved. I don't need fake drama."
Too Many Lies
"Impulsive liars. I had close to the same situation. I wish I would've understood the thought processes and all that, the lying really gets old."
– lil_gusi
Being Used
"I learned I was just a friend of convenience. Nobody wanted me around unless I was a free atm, free tank of gas, or a free ear to b*tch to. Even though they did the bare minimum to act like they cared, my problems were my own. Yet I always had to be available for their weekly/monthly breakdowns about the most avoidable shit, like, saving money to pay a bill. Then it turns into b*tching about something we have planned they can no longer go to, being completely unsubtle that they expect me to offer to foot the bill. Or my personal fav, lying to me about having the money to go do said thing, and then at the last minute, declare they had some unexpected expense to take care of and are now broke, throwing expectant looks my way. But disagree, or get angry, or GOD FORBID say no to something, and it's years of silence. Finally, one day I just decided to keep it that way. Been silent ever since. Why care about ghosting someone when you were never really friends in the first place? Easiest decision ever."
Inconvenient Friendship
"She literally described my friendship as a burden. She said that she spent a lot of her time 'attending to' my messages and hang out time. An email or text message once or twice a week, and maybe a hang out session once a month is a burden? She then told me that I needed to 'think of a way to fix' our friendship."
"If my attention is a burden, then what exactly should I be doing? What does our friendship consist of if I cannot message you or hang out with you without being made to feel guilty about it? Why is it my responsibility to 'fix' our friendship when you're the one claiming it's broken?"
"I didn't exactly mean to ghost her...but every reply I came up with was filled with anger and hurt so I never sent it. It seems she'd be happier without me anyway."
Mean Girls
"One of the girls in my HS group was manipulative and had narcissistic traits."
"She was scheming who to be friends with to gain station and popularity, organized these sh*it talking campaigns to bully some of our classmates and make them seem ridiculous. And multiple times when we hung out she would make all these bitchy remarks at how I behaved and about the things I said. Not even backhandedly, though I think she was aiming to be subtle, and just sucked at it."
"It was ridiculously, the final nail on the coffin was when I was hanging out with a good friend of ours, my sister and this girl. And the whole night she makes these annoying comments at my behavior and interests. Once I finally told her that this is enough, and she needs to stop, she blamed me for flipping over a single small comment, while OBVIOUSLY my sister and one of my best friends had very clearly seen that she was using all my insecurities against me the whole night and that I did not in fact loose it over a single comment."
"Some of my friends still liked her and excused her behavior, so i simply stopped inviting her to places, talking to her and when invited somewhere together, avoided talking to her. After high school ended we didn't talk for years untill she recently sent a message apologizing."
The Antisemitic
"Dude I was friends with for a few years, one day out of seemingly nowhere he started spewing a bunch of anti-jew crap on facebook, essentially blaming the jews for any and every inconvenience or negative experience he or the world experiences. I unfriended him and never attempted contact again."
Too Clingy
People who felt their energy was being sucked away did what they had to do.
Not A Therapist
"He tried to cling to me as if his mental health was my responsibility. He really just couldn't comprehend the fact that having a friend is not the same as talking to a therapist."
Other Perpsective
"I was this friend and I didn't even realise it til she (thankfully only temporarily) ghosted me! I drove her crazy and when she tried to ghost me I was relentless in trying to find out why. She tried to tell me but for some reason it wouldn't get through to me til she just completely removed me from her life. After about 3 months of isolation from [the virus] it clicked and I felt terrible. Dropped her a huge apology and got help. She was so patient and understanding with me and I'm forever grateful for that."
When It Takes Too Much Work
"I found that the friendship was draining all of my energy. Every conversation was negative, she had a victim mentality and a lot of issues that she created herself and refused to address. It became a chore to even talk to her. I know it sounds awful but it's the truth."
More Than Friends
"She weirded me out one too many times trying to be more than friends, and she drank a LOT."
"I moved out of town and didn't tell her. She went so far as to try intimidating my mother to get my address, but Mom knew who she was and why I didn't tell her so she didn't budge."
"This was about 1990. A couple years ago she messaged me on Facebook trying to break the ice with a question about a band I really liked when I knew her. I deleted it and blocked her and it's been quiet since then."
Episode 1 Namaste GIF by Will & Grace
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For many of these Redditors, avoiding confrontation was a better alternative to getting into a verbal – maybe even physical – altercation.
Ghosting is typical in the world of dating where a person sends a message and receives nothing but the silent treatment, but it also seems to be a common occurrence among platonic friendships.
If the goal is to avoid hurting someone's feelings, is ignoring the individual and not dignifying their concerns with some sort of acknowledgement an appropriate response?
Hello? Why are you not responding?
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The old wives' tales.
They are the stories of legend.
I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.
Where did they originate?
WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!
You don't hear about them as much anymore.
It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.
But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.
Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:
"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"
"Wait an hour to swim after eating."
What a crock!
So many summer hours wasted.
I want revenge for that one.
Say Nothing
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"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."
LonelyMail5115
"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."
I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Say Something
"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."
Severe_Airport1426
"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."
crappycurtains
"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."
AlbinoShavedGorilla
Body Temps
"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."
chriseo22
"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."
"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."
apocalypticradish
Arms Down
"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."
Fatmouse84
10 Years Actually
Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Giphy
"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."
"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."
Gecko-911
I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.
This tale is haunting.
High/Low
Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace
Giphy
"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."
LeastFormal9366
"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."
IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI
The Cursed
"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."
"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."
SmoreOfBabylon
Stay In
"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."
"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."
worldbound0514
Dreams and Facts
"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."
"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."
mattshonestreddit
"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."
Darthdemented
Cracked
Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office
Giphy
"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."
Choice-Grapefruit-44
"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."
MacyTmcterry
I love my knuckles.
Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
Every now and then, a friend of ours might say something, or we might overhear a complete stranger say something that makes us stop in our tracks.
More often than not, what we can't believe we just heard is something so ridiculous, we can't help but put the person who said it in their place.
Other times, however, what we just heard might have stunned us silent because of how shockingly clever it was.
Resulting in our not wanting to scold or yell at someone, but rather give them a handshake.
Redditor SubmergingOriginal was curious to hear the sharpest and wittiest things they've ever heard, from friends and strangers alike, leading them to ask:
"Enough with the dumbest; what is the wittiest thing you've ever heard someone say?"
Don't Give Me So Much Credit...
'I was on a team at work that was on a project working insane overtime."
"One night after an 80-90 hour week, we were all sitting around the table trying to finish up so we could go home."
"Around 11, my buddy's wife called, dubious about the hours he'd been keeping."
"We heard her through the line - 'are you cheating on me?'"
"Exasperated, he looked at our boss, then replied 'honey, if I was cheating on you, I would have been home by now'."- lionbatcher
Eternal Optimism...
"Asked a blind guy if he'd been blind his whole life."
"He said 'Not yet'."- Feeling_Mode_6465
Free time Isn't The Only Thing He Has On His Hands...
"My brother got a vasectomy and when the doctor was releasing him and giving him instructions (with the nurse listening in), one of the orders was to 'come back and have a follow-up appointment after you’ve ejaculated 30 times'.”
"Without missing a beat my brother asked 'what time do you open tomorrow?'”
"The nurse couldn’t keep it together after hearing that."- UtahUtopia
Awkward Season 8 GIF by The Office
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Double Whammy!
"My pal uses the phrase 'he doesn’t look strong enough to carry information' and it cracks me up every time."
"Calling someone stupid and weak in one fell swoop."- JennyW93
Can't Hide Your DNA...
'Whenever I jokingly insult my mum, she says 'that must be where you get it from'."
"She cracked the code."
"I can never offend her without offending myself."- JennyW93
Self-Sufficient!
"My brother was a line cook at a New Orleans restaurant."
"My mom was in town, staying at a fancy hotel, and he stopped by after work, still wearing his kitchen whites."
"He was reading a newspaper in the lobby waiting for her to come down when the shocked lobby manager sputtered at him, 'MAY I HELP YOU!?!?'
"He answered, 'thanks, but I know how to read',” and went back to his paper."- jobrody
Morph Current Affairs GIF by Aardman Animations
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A Miracle!
"My brother-in-law’s comment."
"The entire family went out for my mother’s 80th birthday and after the meal we all went to a local park, largely occupied by the elderly, to rest."
"My mother needed crutches at this point, and they were resting against her bench."
"My 10-year-old niece, who looked like every starving waif image from Dickens, grabbed the crutches and started hobbling round the park."
"All the OAPs were following her progress with looks of pity until my brother ran up behind her, and kicked away the crutches."
"There was an audible gasp from round the park and then my niece picked the crutches back up and started chasing my brother, clearly intending to hit him."
"In the confused silence my brother-in-law’s voice rang out 'Praise be! She can walk again!'"
"We still think this was the highlight of the birthday celebrations."- DdraigGwyn
Still Legal, Whichever Way You Cut It...
"I picked up my pleasantly tipsy boyfriend from a nightclub."
"We were stopped by the Police for a random breath test."
"They asked me my age, and I said, 33."
"My bf blurted out '33? You told me you were 22'."
"Police just laughed and let me go."- Aggravating-Corgi379
Music Video Police GIF by Andrew W. K.
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A Bit Too On The Nose?
"Business law class in college years ago, talking about the issues that black Americans had before the Civil Rights."
"Amendment, trying to travel through the south with the discrimination so rampant, trying to find restaurants to serve them and decent lodgings."
"My instructor was posing a hypothetical: 'So you pull up out front of this place, you're exhausted from driving for hours, and you see the sign out front says 'Ku Klux Klan Motel'."
"'What would you expect to find there?'"
"Without missing a beat, from the back of the room came this gem: "'Extra sheets in every room?'"- NedsAtomicDB
Not Yet, Anyway...
"I was working with my friend and his dad."
"My friend (26) heard an ice cream truck near where we were working."
"He asked his dad if he could have a couple dollars."
"His dad asked, 'what for?'"
"My friend told his dad that there was an ice cream truck in the neighborhood, and that they were playing music."
"My friends dad told him "'They don't charge anything to listen to the music'."- tatersalad1234567890
Words Escape You In The Literal "Heat" Of The Moment...
"A friend of mine is a teacher and her husband is known for his wit."
"She told this story to him:"
"One day at school a kid took the hall pass and returned reeking like smoke."
"She asked the kid if he’d been smoking and he denied it over and over."
"She was about to send him to the office when she noticed smoke coming from somewhere."
"She told the kid and he realized that he didn’t put his cig out completely and it was burning in his pants pocket."
"The kid noticed and frantically tried to put it out and someone finally poured water on it."
"Her husband sat listening to this with a weird look on his face."
"She asked him what was wrong."
“'What’s wrong???'"
"'This was probably the only chance you’ll have in your life to say literally, ‘liar,liar, pants on fire’ and you missed your chance'."- Luder714
On Fire No GIF by PEEKASSO
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Amazing What You Might Say A Few Drinks In...
"When I went to a renaissance faire once, I went to a beer tent and ordered a Newcastle Brown Ale (seemed the most fitting for the surroundings)."
"The beer wench, without skipping a beat, said, 'Everyone wants a Newcastle - no one wants to remodel!'"- jayhof52
Read The Room People!
"My dad wiped out when skiing down a mountain and lost a ski."
"After a few minutes of hunting for it, he gives up, slings the one remaining ski over a shoulder and starts walking down the mountain in his ski boots."
"About half-way down, another skier stops and goes 'Gee! Did you lose a ski?'"
"My dad instantly replied 'No, I was out for a walk and found one!'"- PeterJoAl
There's a reason your mother always told you to "use your words".
As clever remarks can have a much more lasting effect on people than a push or shove.