We could seriously title this article: "PEE AFTER SEX... and other things you need to know."
Reddit user Gianluca7papa asked:
Whenever this question comes up on Reddit (or anywhere really) the top responses are pretty much all "pee after sex." It's that important, fam.
That doesn't mean it's the only bit of important info that sex ed classes are leaving out. Believe it or not, sex ed classes aren't legally required to even be medically accurate in most states.
Yeah... the state's education system is totally allowed - and actively encouraged - to lie to students. Is it any wonder so many people hop into bed for the first time and have absolutely no idea what they're doing?
Pee!
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They never taught us to pee after sex. Although, I always heard and read that you should but for some reason.
Well, I've sure learnt my lesson.
I ended up getting a UTI for the first time but I didn't even know because it was asymptomatic. No pain, just thought I was dehydrated because I wasn't passing much. Halfway through my night shift at work one night I went to the bathroom and immediately recognized something was wrong and I started getting pain on my right side. Ended up leaving work and drove myself to hospital at around 10pm. Admitted myself, got tested and and yep, I had a kidney infection. They pumped me full of hardcore antibiotics and hooked me up to fluids. Stayed there for a good few hours, went home and the next day started an antibiotic course for about 2 weeks.
Was definitely a little scared.
Why Pick The Lock?
Foreplay makes alllllll the difference.
And don't let porn vids be your guide. Ask your partner what they like and do that thing. Tell your partner what you like. Communication is key for good sex. Why make me pick the lock when I can just ask for the combination?
Awesome...I get to tell this story again...
In high school, a group of us guys thought we all had about the same understanding of the mechanics of sex. I'm certain we'd all watched porn at some point, etc., and were all in the same health class.
Too Uncomfortable
If you're too uncomfortable to ask him to wear a condom or have a conversation about birth control, then you're not ready to have sex with this person
I knew some girls in high school who got pregnant because they didn't want to seem uncool to talk about it or they were too shy to speak up before having sex
For The Guys New To The Game
Beyond the stuff listed here, the UTIs/STDs/foreplay, how bout some things for the guys new to the game about to dive in to the fun:
- Nobody will ever make fun of you, or think anything but "good for them!" when you buy condoms. CONDOMS ARE CHEAPER THAN DIAPERS. STEAK DINNERS ARE CHEAPER THAN KIDS. Experiment by yourself with the types. Some types get warm on you, some pull so tight they kill my boner, or cut off circulation. I have my personal favorite I know to get, because they work perfectly for me, give me great sensation through the condom, and don't act like a rubber band that you used to get bored and wrap around your finger 20 times in class.
- While you're experimenting at home seeing which condom feels best for you, learn how to put one on easily. You weren't born knowing how to throw a football or dribble a basketball; that took an afternoon to learn. Same thing with ripping open a condom wrapper in the moment, and sliding it on while you're still lip-locked with the girl. Pinch the tip, roll it down.
- Pay attention. Seriously, this will get you everywhere, over and over. Pay attention to how she reacts when you do grab, squeeze, stroke, pull, whatever. You will run into the entire spectrum, from girls who don't get any real arousal going from someone playing with their tits, all the way to girls who can literally orgasm from someone working with their nipples. But you'll never know if you don't pay attention.
- [Edited to add in the most important one] DON'T TRY TO SCREW LIKE A PORNO. I once heard Ron Jeremy long ago say in an interview, "If it looks good, it feels like sh!t to us doing it. When it feels good, it looks like sh!t on a camera." I then stopped trying to get the camera-angle-doggy bullshit, and go with whatever got us both going, and ya, you're never going to film sex that feels good.
Incompatible
Discussing what you enjoy and what you don't with your partner isn't awkward or weird. Also, you may not be compatible sexually with everyone and that's ok.
Call An Ambulance
Went to a Catholic school and we never got any sex education.
I never knew about female orgasm with my first boyfriend (together for more than a year). When I had my very first one with my next boyfriend, I thought I had a heart attack that I actually wanted him to call an ambulance.
20 In 20
That the way people have sex in porn is usually not normal, not enjoyable and not going to get any woman to orgasm. Too many men out there think doing 20 positions for 20 seconds each is great sex.
The Hymen Lie
Your hymen doesn't break, it just stretches out, but even if you are relaxed, and use enough lube, not only the first time, but the first couple of times can be painful
An Involuntary Response
That arousal is a parasympathic nervous system response. You have no control over it and it does not mean you like or are attracted to somebody. It's an automated system to protect mucus membranes from damage. And most of all;
If you ever felt to blame for something that happened to you because your body responded with arousal, I am hear to tell you that you had no control over that at all.
Everyone should know this. EVERYONE!
Literally Everything
Literally everything, I went to a Catholic school and the first time I had sex I didn't even really know there was supposed to be thrusting. I actually envisioned sex just as a guy lying on top of a girl with his penis in her. A lot of pop culture references to sex made soooo much more sense to me after I lost my virginity. Specifically I remember this one scene in The Frighteners where this ghosts gets in a woman's coffin and starts vigorously humping, it was supposed to be comedic but I was always just like 'Why the f is he doing that?'
NOW I KNOW.
Matters of Moisture
Lube is a product for a reason, substitutes rarely work as well as the real deal, and there's no shame in using it for P in V intercourse, it wasn't developed solely for anal.
Also, for those with the opposite issue, keep some sort of wipe handy. Getting too wet in the middle of sex can decrease sensation, increase the odds of the penis popping out unexpectedly, and therefore increases the chance that you will BREAK THE PENIS. DON'T BREAK THE PENIS. It takes forever to heal, and all those random erections and half chubs you get that you hardly notice? They. Will. HURT.
Female Bodies
More about the female body. I only learned the basics in high school such as where the penis is supposed to go and about menstruation etc. while the male body was extensively discussed. The result is that I know more of a penis I don't have than of my own body.
Actually, I discussed my findings with friends and my mother (my mother and I are very comfortable talking about these things) and they were all surprised about what I discovered. Even my mother, who has been sexually active for like more than 40 years or so, didn't know how her own body worked precisely because these things aren't being taught and discussed. It's ridiculous.
As Seen On TV
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It's way messier than portrayed on TV.
But messy DOES NOT equal bad. Some of the most memorable nights of my life ended with the words "Well... We BOTH need a shower."
Also way less graceful, seriously nobody is that good at taking off clothes in the moment.
Not Representative
That genitalia you see in videos and print are not necessarily representative of genitalia in the general population.
Cervical Slam
Once had a student in my health class back in grade 9 ask my teacher "what if I hit the cervix of a girl with my penis while I'm having intercourse?? Could it cause issue?" And my health teacher responded "You wont ever hit a girls cervix so don't worry about it. You would have to have a 10 inch member to have to worry about that happening."
Fast forward 2 years, and I found out that was bullshit pretty fast. I have had consistent issues with multiple girls with accidentally hitting her cervix during sex, most of them actually find it very painful and causes us to just straight up not be able to do some positions... And I can assure you I do not possess a 10 inch peen. He was full of sh!t. Wish I was told beforehand that it can be such a big problem.
Trust
So I have not had sex yet (I'm 23) but something that I wished they talked about was that not everyone has sex during high school. Also, that having trust is the most important thing in any relationship. There's no point in having sex or a relationship if there's not any trust. This is why I never had sex cause I never trusted anyone enough back in high school. Only recently did I find someone who I trusted and we are currently planning to have sex. If you aren't ready, don't have sex until you are.
- mammaube
Girls Too
That girls cum too.
No one ever mentioned female orgasm. So when I was younger the goal was "make this dude cum and you won the sex."
I never even had an orgasm til I was pregnant. In my sleep. I had these wet dreams on the reg while I was pregnant-
ANYWAY when I was younger I'd feel the orgasm coming on, but it felt so intense that I'd always stop myself before it happened. Until one night I woke up throbbing and was like "awww sht that's what we're lookin for."
Mindset Matters
How important your mindset is going into it. Its easy to become numb with all the access to porn, and this cultural idea that sex is borderline meaningless. Its become normal to want to just hook up with people and not have any strings attached. There are negative affects with this mindset that usually come in the form of being emotionally unavailable, or overly attached. I myself have been on both sides of that coin, and let me tell you I felt like the biggest bag of sh!t.
It really messed with me emotionally either because I gave feelings to someone that didn't care, or I was with someone that would have made me happy, but didn't bother to pursue a relationship afterwards. It would've helped a lot if I was thought the mental/emotional aspect of being intimate with someone although I cant fully blame my mistakes on not knowing better. I'm only 21, and I'm glad I've learned this lesson early. Take my advice: stop watching porn, or at least cut down on it. Get off tinder, and get more active. Overall just get your life together, and you will attract someone.
- dissident_hellion
Uncircumcised
An uncircumcised and circumcised dick look the same when erect. I used to be so self conscious about not being circumcised because it isn't as common anymore in the US, and movies and tv shows always made it seem like girls would think it was gross. But honestly, I never had a single issue with girls because of it. I remember telling a girlfriend I wasn't, and she just said "Okay" and that was that. Besides, you can actually feel more sensation when you aren't circumcised. Extra nerve endings from the foreskin.
Like Eating
Sex is not as big a deal as people make it out to be, its not an exclusive club or a forbidden fruit. Stop putting it on a pedestal and talk about it.
Don't get me wrong, sex can make you feel amazing and release pleasures unknown. But it's also just a mechanical process, like eating, or exercising. It shouldn't loom over your very existence or contribute anything to who you are as a person when it comes to communicating about sex and how you like it.
Using the eating example, it's easy to tell people when you have stuff you don't eat or what you prefer without pressure of anyone kicking up a big fuss.
You should think as sex the same way, you're telling them what you like, telling them how you want it, and not feeling guilty if they complain. If you told them you don't like broccoli and they serve it to you anyway, it's their fault for ignoring you and there is no pressure for you to eat it. No matter if you're having a junk food quickie, or a long, sensual romantic meal, you eat to enjoy it.
With this in mind, also allow yourself to be a little selfish during sex. It's about having a good time for BOTH of you.
- SgtWings
The Smell
The smell.
Seriously. My parents had to know what me and my girlfriend were doing just based on that alone. Along the same lines, the importance of cleaning up thoroughly afterwards...
- [Reddit]
Asexuality
That ASEXUALITY IS A THING. Not everyone will feel sexual attraction or a desire to participate in sexual activity.
This doesn't mean they can't love someone, or that their love is fake if they don't want to have sex. This doesn't mean they're impotent, or have weak hormones. This isn't them making an excuse for being a virgin.
And it is NOT a mental illness.
Sex isn't required to be happy. Sex isn't what life has to be about.
And asexual people are just as much people as everyone else, and perfectly valid.
Gay Pregnancy
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Where I went it was only Heterosexual sex taught. Doesn't really help when you're gay. The was a small period where (as a guy) I thought having sex with a guy would get me pregnant.
- People Explain How Important Sex Really Is in Their Relationships - George Takei ›
- People Share The Sexual Facts Everyone Would Benefit From Knowing - George Takei ›
- People Explain Which Gender Stereotypes They Absolutely Despise - George Takei ›
- People Share Which Things Should Be Covered In Sex Ed But Never Are - George Takei ›
- People Confess Which Things They Would Actually Give Up Sex For - George Takei ›
- Men Share Lessons That All Guys Should Know But Are Rarely Taught - George Takei ›
- People Imagine Which Other Liquids They'd Prefer To Pee - George Takei ›
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
homer simpson episode 23 GIF
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
Disney World GIF
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.