Female genital anatomy is not some mystical unlockable box holding an ancient curse or anything complicated like that.
Still, men often seem to struggle to understand it.
Reddit's here to help.
Reddit user Slow-Bluejay9648 asked:
"Girls, what should men know about the vagina?"
So listen, let's have a quick anatomy lesson, shall we?
All humans start out as "female" - fetuses don't develop "male" anatomy til later in the game and obviously not all of them do. It can be easier to understand anatomy if you understand that men and women are built from the same stuff.
Men are just women, the re-mix.
Lower
Ro Oops GIF by Rosanna PansinoGiphy"For the first timers, the hole where you put the peni in is a little lower than you think."
- DayaBen
"That was definitely a surprise the first time lol"
"I think we just assume you guys have your stuff where we have ours and vice versa. That's why so many girls ask questions like 'what happens when you ride a bike.' "
- ShellSide
"Fun fact, the 'seam' in a guy's scrotum is the result of their vagina closing up when they develop male body characteristics in utero."
- dewey-defeats-truman
"That really puts it into perspective."
"As a kid you’d think the opening and the penis were in the same location. But since your penis is analogous to their clitoris, which is above the opening, you have to go much lower."
- that1prince
Pee Pointers
"We don’t pee out of it."
- starro11
"This is too hard to comprehend."
- [Reddit]
"Women have two holes other than the anus."
"One that is their vagina and then they have another hole higher up that is the urethra. But the urethra is really tiny so it's not really visible at quick glance."
- Nefarious_No2
"Female anatomy is glossed over so quickly in early schooling, so lots of people - women included - didn't realize there are three holes for women, not two."
"I’m a full grown woman and I didn’t really understand that the uterus wasn’t just a big vacant sac in my body until I was like almost 30. It’s shameful! Sex education really needs to be revamped."
- lilmorphinannie
Moans = Same
"When we moan out in pleasure it does not mean speed up or do it 'harder.' It means keep doing exactly what you're doing."
-mamaemcee
"I literally have to remind my husband of this ALL THE TIME. Stop speeding up when you’re literally doing PERFECTLY."
-Hey-Kristine-Kay
"There's no harm in a little correction if they change what's working in the moment... 'no, don't stop, just like that...perfect.' "
"A moan is just a moan. Use your words to get what you want/need."
-Haunting-Ad-8619
Acid Spit
James Cameron Aliens GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy"Vaginas are quite acidic, to the point were discharge can bleach under garments."
- KennyJacobs1
"I buy my vajayjay cute panties and the b*tch thanks me by ruining them. 😠"
- awkwardaznbabe
"When I was young I was confused because I thought the discoloring on panties was a sign of being dirty."
"Turned out I just have a very high ph."
- Balding_Unit
"A lot of men (and women) think the discolored underwear is a sign of the woman's vagina being 'dirty' when it's not at all."
- sinistergzus
Q&A
"Just because your ex liked certain things doesn‘t mean your current partner does. Communication is key and porn not a good teacher."
-rhysentlymcnificent
"It always baffles me that people don't seem to talk that much before/during/after."
"Sex in a relationship gets even better if you know what your partner likes, so be attentive and talk about it. Obviously don't overdo with the questioning, but a bit goes a long way."
"Don't be shy about 'Does this work for you? Can we try x? Do you mind if i wear my fluffy earmuffs while we do it?' "
-SometimesGameDev
"It doesn't help that many people just expect you to know what they do/don't like."
"They assume since you've had previous partners you should know how to 'please any man/woman.' Had a couple experiences where the lady would get a bit pissy because I ask a few questions to find out what she's feeling while I'm doing something."
-kjlwillycoyote
"I would honestly be super disappointed in my partner if they didn't ask questions. I don't care if you've had 0 or 300 partners, don't assume."
"Hell, ask me as much as you want, it shows you care enough to want to really, truly please me"
-rowdymonster
The Mother Of All Myths
"The hymen has nothing to do with your virginity."
- zelihaalyshia
"People really do describe it like a freshness seal."
"Pop it open and you have 3 days to consume the vagina before it spoils, 4 if you refrigerate it."
- uuuuuuuhburger
"Also it’s not common the hymen completely covers the vagina."
"Most of us still have our damn hymen and it just stretches open- it’s very obvious when you know what it looks like!"
- throwmedownthequarry
"And also that there are so many different types of hymens that we don't get taught about."
"I thought I was a freak of nature because of my weird hymen."
"Turns out it's called a septate hymen."
- -Saraphina-
Terminology Troubles
"That the vagina is the inside of the female genitalia."
"If you’re referring to the outer genitalia like clit or labia, that’s the vulva."
- Myble
"Over 90% of the clitoris is internal. What most people call the clit is the clitoral glans."
- tallbutshy
"Ive been scrolling forever looking for someone commenting on this, thank you for pointing it out because I think more people should know this!"
"My genitalia is more than just the hole where things go in."
"But I agree with comments saying that there are no good words in English if you dont want to use 'p*ssy'."
"Imagine if we started to refer to the male genitalia as 'the shaft' or something like that. There are other fun things to also play with down there ;) "
- marresaurus
" 'Vulva' is just the exterior stuff, 'genitals' takes you all the way to the ovaries. Is there no in between word?"
- HRHHayley
Shrinkage
"The vagina reverts to its original snugness."
"It shrinks after babies. Your penis is meaningless to it."
- garmonbozia66
"This! Women push babies out and go back to normal afterwards, sometimes the vagina even gets tighter after birth."
- Particular-Coffee-52
Your Potential Pool
"Dudes, if you openly use terms like 'meat curtains' or make fun of different types of labia, I can guarantee you that you have minimized your potential hookup pool."
"A) it can make a woman (who may have otherwise been interested) insecure."
"B) Women can’t help what their labia looks like."
"C) it’s a turn off to hear people talking bad about others’ bodies- just like it’s sh*tty for women to make fun of penis size."
"Making fun of body parts isn’t cool or sexy."
- 15nyb179
Rug Burn
"Ramming a penis that's dry on the sides into the vagina because its "kinda" wet does not feel good."
"If they're moving uncomfortably while you're trying to stick it in thats probably why. Either spread the wet to cover entire vag area outside or make the sides of your dick wet."
"Edit: for clarity. Friction doesn't equal pleasure. No one wants to feel rug burn on their delicates."
- Any-Cup-91
Proof This Thread Works
"Okay so man here."
"I came across this thread yesterday and didn’t think much of it except it made sense. But not in an eye-opening way."
"A couple of ‘sessions’ ago, my wife asked me to slow down and I realized how much longer I could last just by that little bit of criticism. But there was still that instinctual rush to finish."
"Anyway, so last night, things got hot and heavy and I remembered this thread and made an effort to actually slow down and just keep doing what I was doing when she reacted well."
"Wow. Oh my god."
"I’m not going to go into details, but um…this was a big improvement."
"So from a man who has only ever been with his wife, thank you for this."
- LilBueno
Before You Get Into It
"1) Don't learn sex from porn."
"We can tell what men have learned sex from porn. Vs. Having a long term girlfriend where men get comfortable asking questions and taking feedback."
"Most things in porn are done to look good, not because they feel good."
"2) Sex is extremely intimate, be comfortable with the person you're banging before banging them."
"Talk, ask them about their relationship with sex, approach to sex, what they are into etc...before you get into them."
- Lauraleone
Plum
"I haven’t seen this one here yet: when a woman is aroused the vulva swells up like a plum because blood is flowing thru."
"It may also slightly change color depending on her skin tone."
- SituationSpecial6247
Boom
"Honestly…you don’t have to know anything."
"Just be open to communicating & hearing what your partner has to say about what pleases her."
"That’s it. Boom."
- alexan3
Hold It???
"You can't hold the blood in when your period hits."
"I seriously hate it when guys say: 'oh just hold it.' "
"I WISH I COULD DO THAT WITH MINE!! IF ONLY!!"
"The school system will say that guys shouldn't know that since its not their business. 😬 It should be!"
"Cause then if they know about it he'd be a 10x better boyfriend, father, friend, and human for that."
"It seems to be very underrated of guys knowing female bodies and how they work and what is and isn't healthy."
- Rosy_cookie143
Salty Skin
"As a kid, I always thought vaginas must be really tasty, like sweet n all because I'd seen men just feast on it in porn."
"Boy was I disappointed when I learnt it's just... skin. Same old salty skin."
- dumbsheet_
Control
"Discharge is normal and unlike body hair (which we can control, but sometimes choose not to, which is totally okay) we literally can’t control when it comes or doesn’t."
"So don’t call it gross because that’s equivalent to shaming somebody for living."
- Ssplitheartt
G Spot
"Not everyone who has a vagina necessarily has a G-spot."
"Try not to get so offended when someone can't finish from fingering/penetration alone. Some people find that hard because their bodies simply aren't built that way."
- baybaluzza
Tact
"Be tactful with your comments on appearance."
"I dated a blithering idiot who went down on me and literally said 'wow that's the biggest one I've even seen!' not in a sexy way like a woman would say about a man's dick."
"It instantly annoyed me. I still don't know if he was talking about my clit or my labia which are - at most - both slightly bigger than average."
"It was 5 years ago and I still think about that moment when I realised in a millisecond that I didn't want to be involved with that man."
"Have a filter don't just blurt out dumb shit that comes to your mind. It just makes you look and sound very inexperienced and unsexy."
- [Reddit]
What major vaginal misunderstandings have you witnessed in your life?
Sound off in the comments!
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Oh the penis, what a strange little appendage.
It is the source of so much joy and so much drama.
And there is so much to know about it.
Penis knowledge often feels neglected.
Are you curious? Let's discuss...
Redditor Helpful_Jellyfish_69 wanted the men out there to speak about and shed some light on anatomy. They asked:
"Men of Reddit, what should women know about the penis?"
I hate anatomy. They should have taught us more in high school. No?
Sensitive
Sad Baby GIF by BounceGiphy"It’s overwhelmingly sensitive mid and post orgasm."
Aethelstan-
Stuck...
"It sometimes sticks to our thighs and we have to take a big step to unstick them."
wetlettuce42
"Women have to rearrange the furniture sometimes too."
ZTwilight
"I’m going to be watching every single man walk now and when they take a big step I’m gonna know that it's is stuck to their thighs."
Arkady2009
Cartilage
"A lot of penises naturally harden in a certain direction. I’ve had multiple partners that love to mess around and pull on it when hard. It's a very odd and uncomfortable sensation. Best thing I can compare it to is pushing the cartilage in your nose in the wrong direction, but a lot more sensitive. Guys may not react a lot, but at least ask if stuff feels weird."
Die_woofer
Fragile
Schitts Creek Pain GIF by CBCGiphy"That thin bit of stretched skin connecting the shaft and head from below… it's easy to rip, so please be careful down there."
Xylophonewarrior
Well that last one is terrifying. Even I didn't know that.
Waterworks
Episode 4 Swimming GIF by HeelsGiphy"It floats in water."
Reddit-username_here
"I mostly use the shower and don’t use the bathtub but a few years ago I did and found that it was floating lmao. It was hella funny when I discovered it."
wasabiEatingMoonMan
Bad Mix
"It doesn't always get along with antidepressants. It's not you, the medication can cause lower libido or none at all, with or without various erectile dysfunctions, at random times for some, all the time for others."
SquizzleSE
"Penis-bearer with ADHD on Vyvanse (dexamphetamine) - correct. It skyrockets the libido but makes it harder to maintain/achieve an erection."
"Cialis/viagra counters that by enabling easier blood flow though so there's definitely solutions to most problems that are results of other medications unwanted side effects except perhaps anorgasmia somewhat commonly caused by antidepressants."
SquizzleSE
SURPRISE!!
"I've seen women say 'don't mess with me if your stick doesn't extend past your testicles when flaccid.' This is a misunderstanding of growers and show-ers. A show-er is obviously as big as he shows with a relative few cm difference. A grower can really surprise you, starting as a button and ending as a bratwurst."
TheRealMekkor
“not ready”
"He has own mind. We can’t control the erection. He can increase in size up to 3 times from 'not ready' position. So when u see it’s 'not ready' and it looks small, just wait, there is still good chances."
Okkaaaaaey
"The 'multiplier' is different. Some are a shower, where they are big flaccid, and don't increase a lot when getting hard. Some are growers, but can be like 3 times as big erect as flaccid."
Not_Like_Equals_Gay
Terror
The Big Bang Theory Reaction GIFGiphy"Anxiety erections are a thing; I’m terrified of this exam tomorrow, I’m not horny."
tartar-buildup
Erections. It's always about the erections.
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I can definitely tell you that I did not receive much sex ed growing up. It definitely happened–it was folded into our biology classes, actually–but it focused more on how the reproductive cycle works and didn't cover the things that are often lacking in sex ed.
For instance, comprehensive sexual education should include lessons on human development. Reproduction, puberty, sexual orientation, and gender identity would all fit under this.
Personal skills should be emphasized too: Communications, negotiation, and decision-making are all–or should be–integral to sexual education.
People have plenty of opinions on the matter, as I'm sure you can imagine.
We heard their thoughts after Redditor clou_dor asked the online community:
"What should be covered in sex ed class but never is?"
"So I went through middle school..."
"This is gonna sound dumb but here it is. In sex ed, they would tell us how much we bleed during our period but never the pressure of the blood. So I went through middle school thinking that if my period started, blood would be GUSHING OUT, like if i got stabbed."
"I was paranoid as a preteen thinking at any time my period could start and i would end up drenched in blood from the waist down. No one ever told me the blood pressure was not in fact that of a stab wound but more of a nose bleed or a dripping faucet."
idek_lmao
To which this person replied:
"Also the different colors it can be. The first time I got my period I thought I somehow got skid marks in the front of my panties. I wasn't worried about it being a period, I thought I pooped myself and it all sprayed forward."
DirtyMarTeeny
"I had no idea..."
"Miscarriages. I had no idea that a miscarriage was like five days of the worst cramps and unending blood. This is a thing that happens to like 1/3 of women and most of us have no idea until we have one and then no one talks about it."
No-country-2008
To which this person replied:
"I think everyone should know just how common miscarriages are! It's quite likely that multiple women you know have had at least one."
robophile_ta
"The number of people..."
"How STD/STIs actually affect you and what treatments there are available."
"The number of people who don't realize being asymptomatic is the most common symptom is shocking. Also the amount of men who think they still shove a little umbrella up their urethra and scrape it out to cure gonorrhea is sad. You take a pill for it. The invasive penis scraping was a very old and very not used anymore treatment."
"Also they could do more to destigmatize getting tested regularly if you have multiple partners or getting tested at the beginning of each relationship if you're a monogamous person. STD/STIs don't devalue you and I find sex ed really doesn't do anything other than make people feel dirty and ashamed about contracting something."
"Chances are the person who gave it to you was asymptomatic and didn't know they had it and are also victims of a fear and shame based sexual health education."
123throwawaybanana
To which this person replied:
"I got tested before a new relationship and thwy wouldn't let me gove blood becauee I must have had a reason to think I was sick."
Nellasofdoriath
"I straight thought..."
"How vaginal discharge changes based on your fertile days - I straight thought I was getting sick as a teen."
Spazztastic85
To which this person replied:
"And that ovulation cramps are a thing. And I hate them. I’ve had them since I was a teen and I always thought something was wrong. I would ask my friends and no one else normally got them so that info didn’t help."
BroadBaker5101
"We didn't learn..."
"We didn't learn about childbirth. At all. Nothing about dilation, contractions, labor etc."
Spicyhashbrowns
To which this person replied:
"I believe that it's intentional that they don't talk about childbirth because it is terrifying, and most women won't be enthusiastic about going through it. So they promote the cute picture of babies growing and how wonderful everything would be."
Vivid379
"A vast majority..."
"Pornography needs to be put in context. A vast majority of sexual intercourse isn't anything like that."
seefifth
To which this person replied:
"This comment needs to be higher. Learning about sex only through porn is like learning to cook having only watched 'reality' shows where they make a 4 course dinner in an hour while your school system is saying you're too young to use the stove."
Puzzleheadedbat
"The whole..."
"The whole of the actual clitoral structure."
tinygriggle
To which this person replied:
"We didn't even have the clitoris mentioned. Or anything in the vagina or vulva. We got a diagram of a uterus and that was it."
ShiraCheshire
"Aside from the pain..."
"Not just how to prevent getting an STD, but how to handle it emotionally and have honest dialogue with future partners if you do end up getting one. I personally was almost two years into a committed relationship when my partner gave me herpes."
"Aside from the pain and psychological effect it had on me, I was even more hurt to find out years later that he knew he had it from a previous relationship but didn’t tell me or try to protect me in any way. Totally preventable and unnecessary."
uoyroftonsisihT
To which this person replied:
"I came to say this. And also that you shouldn't be ashamed of having an STD. It's so common that it's terrible how talking about it is still a taboo for some people."
Brujula9
"Sex ed is often very focused..."
"Pregnancy. Sex ed is often very focused on avoiding getting pregnant and avoiding getting STIs. How much being pregnant sucks is rarely discussed."
737900ER
To which this person replied:
"I also think that sex ed should teach some realities of raising a child. Especially with newborns, roughly the first few months to first year is difficult because they tend to cry for just about every reason you can think of. But on top of that children throw tantrums, misbehave, and ask lots of questions. Sometimes annoyingly so."
Ahstia
"Telling people..."
"Telling people about cleanup. Apparently some girls thought their vaginas would just absorb everything and it wouldnt all come out."
VacuumLawyer
To which this person replied:
"Although I knew all the mechanics of sex and what-not, I can safely say that we are absolutely not prepared in any way for the aftermath. Nobody talks about these things."
orangestar17
See how much pain, stress, and embarrassment could be avoided if society was just a little more honest about the human body? Sex ed is nothing to be ashamed about – it's crucial to living a healthy life.
Have some observations of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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***WARNING: NSFW thread***
Why are so many of us such puritans when it comes to discussing sex?
After all there is a lot to chat about.
Why so shy?
Everybody needs to speak up on the matter more.
It's all the non-speaking that leads to trouble.
Ladies!
Men have a few things they want to share.
Redditorjestgowithitwanted the gents of Reddit to let the ladies in on a few details about sexy time.
They asked:
"Guys of Reddit, what is one piece of sex advice you could give to women?"
Sex is a communication sport.
No matter how many people are involved.
So let's communicate.
Working Together
"Firmly but gently." ~ JuanCSanchez
"A fun, sexy tip I gave on reddit once was: girls, if you'd like to learn how to masturbate a guy properly, buy lube, have him grab your hand and use it instead. Lessons will be learned, and everyone gets to enjoy themselves." ~ leroy_hoffenfeffer
GiphySPEAK UP!!
“Women, if there’s something that turns you on, if there’s something that gets you excited, something that really makes you hot, makes you nasty. HOWS ABOUT FILLING US IN AS TO WHAT THE HELL IT IS!!!” -the late and great Sam Kinison." ~ goateyboyjr
"I think, as a woman adding on, some of us don’t really know what we like until we try it so we sometimes don’t know. I didn’t know I liked to be fondled until it happened and I didn’t know I liked hickeys until I got one. I would always fantasize about doing it from behind but when I actually did it, I felt like a cow." ~ CapriciousSalmon
Feels good to be wanted...
"Please be more touchy. Run your hands over a guys body, feel him, grab, caress, kiss." ~ Reddit
"Haha. Just left a similar comment under another comment. Like damn girls we like to be touched and kissed and caressed and devoured all over too. Feels good to be wanted. I always hear guys don’t do foreplay but so many women just give a couple tugs and think nothing else is warranted." ~ ChillinVillianNW
For Starters...
"Don't be afraid to initiate sex." ~ degeneratesumwitch
"I remember trying to initiate many times with my ex but he was not interested any time I did. Then he had to gall to tell me I never try to initiate sex! I told him I did but I stopped because of rejection so many times so I just let him do it since he got horny at weird times like 2 in the afternoon." ~ Lick_The_Wrapper
Be Real
"Don't fake orgasms to spare your partner's feelings, you'll end up teaching them to do the wrong things in bed and make it even less likely they'll get you off the next time." ~ Spike-Rockit
GiphyAs a gay man so much of this is over my head.
But I'm willing to listen.
Go For It!
"If you want it, don't be shy. It's a huge turn on when a girl goes for what she wants." ~ User_492006
GiphyYou're Beautiful!!
"Don't be self conscious about body parts, stretch marks, shape, or any of that stuff the vast majority of us adults don't care about. Nothing is going to stop the blood draining from our brains." ~ -technosapien-
"Oh man. My GF has stretch marks all over (2 kids + medical issues with weight gain/loss in the past). I don't even care because she's still sexy af, clothes or no. Having her in my arms is the best thing that's ever happened to me and she's finally all mine (and I'm all hers)." ~ thepenis_mightier
Open Up...
"Communicate; talk about boundaries, likes, dislikes, etc. early on. Don’t be afraid to initiate sex with your partner; a lot of men (like myself) are dense or have a hard time doing so ourselves, even when we’re comfortable with our partner. If he doesn’t last long, and I can’t stress this one enough, he can use some assurance!" ~ Omni_Devil
Be Blunt!
"Stop being coy! We are NOT going to get it!" ~ ColinBridgerton
"Oh man, as a guy I must second this. Hell, I don't even notice clutter, forget subtle advances. Wife did some tidying while I was at work. Then coyly asked if I noticed anything different. Like, baby noooo. I didn't even notice when your Mom painted her kitchen and living room colors on the opposite side of the color wheel from their original state."
"Like sure, it might feel tidier and more open now that you mention it, but you need to be blunt 😂. Elaborating on the MIL story a bit. When my MIL asked if I noticed anything different, I didn't. So I went with the ole 'yeah it looks real clean in here today!'" ~ nbuzd
Start it Up
"My penis is attached to my body. Don't act like you're trying to start a damn lawnmower." ~ pardonmynonsequitur
GiphyArticulate...
"Be vocal. For the love of hell, TELL US what you like/don't like."
this1is4thechampions
"With specifics. Slight changes in volume or cadence to a moan can still be ambiguous. Gotta be like those guys at the airport directing a plane into the gate. Leave no doubts about what needs to be done."
AgoraiosBum
Thigh High
"Don't question why it's sexier to leave on your thigh high socks during sex just leave them on."
dragonshit94
"Sorry but I’m stunned anyone would question this or remove them. I specifically put them ON for a reaction (and my own)!"
brunettesandbacon
"Oh lawd, thigh-highs get me going faster than a night gown or even the sexiest lingerie you got."
Mr_NeCr0
Fingers
"Before you put your finger in someone’s a**, ask for consent."
Flojo12
"THIS. I had a girl over once and she kept touching my butt like she wanted to eat it but I said no soooo many times and then she kept edging her fingers closer to my a**hole and I was like 'do you want me to do you in the butt?' And when she replied no I said 'well until you say yes I’m not saying yes either' and then she completely lost interest in me because I didn’t want to let her peg me like dude CONSENT!!"
curryandmilk
Consent
"Once you get consent, It is perfectly OK to slam a guy into the bed and take what you want."
DukeBeekeepersKid
"I once went to this guy's house for sex of course but even before we did anything, we were already hot I was already on my knees I looked up and asked for his consent to take his pants off and I swear it turned him on even more. I'm hot just thinking about it."
Rude_Girl69
be happy
"Enthusiasm is everything. You don’t always have to do it right, but you, at the very least, have to want to do it right. Right?"
shah357
Happy Gene Simmons GIF by TrueRealGiphyButtons
"1) Make an effort in bed, don't just lay there..."
"2) Don't be afraid to be vulnerable..."
"3) If we're not doing it the way that you like it, teach us how YOU like it. Don't hold back. Every woman is different, and we can't read your mind. Most guys get really turned on when they know that they're 'hitting all the right buttons.' It's a primal thing..."
Extreme_Today_984
Respect your body...
"Respect yourself. Respect your body. You are not obligated to be a porn star or to do anything you don’t want to do. Humanity got by pretty damn well with vanilla sex for thousands of years and men didn’t complain. Now with generations growing up with porn as their sex guide, they have a twisted and warped idea as to what sex is."
"Don’t fall into that trap. Be confident. Be yourself, and men will fall to your feet. Don’t bend yourself backwards to please mens sexual perversions unless they're yours too."
MeisterJTF2
Teach...
"Don’t fake orgasms. Teach. If there’s an ego thing with all that, I recommend saying 'hey how bout tonight is all about you, partner. Why don’t you just tell me what you want me to do. Tomorrow, how bout it’s all about me, I’ll show you what I like the best.' Give then take. That’s how my wife and I got better at each other, and our orgasms are pretty mutual… unless she’s faking."
We're dumb...
"Talk to us. We're dumb. Tell us what you like and don't like. Take our hand and put it there."
Raspberries-Are-Evil
So DumbGiphyFlesh
"We have extragenital erogenous zones, just the same as you do. Ears, lips, eyelids, fingertips, nipples, pelvic region. Look at a Nervous Homunculus illustration for reference (warning: do not expect to be titillated by the image as it is somewhat off-putting). These are areas where somatosensory nerves are closely clustered."
"Basically any attention paid to our skin, from soles to scalp, is a turn on, but these areas in specific will drive us crazy. Just remember to be gentle. We are all made of the same material, and men have a far lower threshold for pain."
dreamrock
Well I hope all of this helps.
Now go on out and have some fun.
Responsibly of course.
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People Who Had 'Abstinence Only' Sex Ed Break Down The Most Outrageous Things They Were Taught
Image by Capri23auto from Pixabay |
Let's talk about sex baby, let's talk about you and me and... everybody you can possibly think of. Why are we so timid do discuss this issue? It's really an American issue. The Europeans seem fine to openly share naughty details and run around naked in front of one another. But in America the topic is still taboo. That's why so many artists push so many boundaries with the topic, to spark discussion. And it's imperative that the discussion be fact-based. Too many schools are handing out information to students that will only cause more problems later. Abstinence is not the only answer and quite frankly, is unlikely. Time to spill facts.
Redditor u/bongzmcdongz was hoping we could all rationally discuss the actualities of the birds and bees by asking... People who had "Abstinence Only" sex education, what was the most outrageous or untrue thing you were told?
***The following material is sensitive but imperative. Those under 17 should have a parental chat!***
"Facts"
I myself attended Catholic school, and we never once discussed the carnal. In fact, when we inquired about Mary and her "Virgin" birth, we were immediately shut down with... because it's in the Bible. What else does one expect nuns to say? Now I did leave Catholic school after eighth grade, so I have no idea what they taught in high school, but it's probably safe to assume they mostly skim the actual facts. Maybe I'm wrong... let's see.
Something is Missing
x factor what GIFGiphyI was given a diagram of the female anatomy in which the clitoris had been erased-- as in someone went into MS paint and whited it out on a line drawing of the exterior of the vulva. The urethra, vagina, labia, anus were labelled, and then at the top of the labia, it was whited out.
the what is a WHAT?!
That the actual vagina opening is as small as the tip of a pencil. I also never knew women didn't pee from their vaginas until I was 16. I'm 19 now and learned more from crap-posts on the internet than I ever had in school.
"I also never knew women didn't pee from their vaginas until I was 16."
Believe it or not, that puts you well ahead of the game. You'd be amazed at the amount of grown men who don't know that! 🌸.
SMDH!!
Actual quote from my 9th grade health class:
"If you have sex, chances are you won't get HIV. But, chances are you will."
Kissing is Gross
creep no GIF by Manny404GiphyKissing gets you pregnant.
Same except the nuns told us that French kissing in a bathing suit would get you pregnant. Also, they said you shouldn't go on a date to a restaurant that uses white tablecloths because that looks like sheets which would make your date think of bed and you'd end up having sex.
Ouch!
Girls and boys had to go to different rooms during sex-Ed. The girls were told that "abstinence is the best option because sex is painful." The boys weren't told that.
I understand that sex can be painful for some people, but pretending sex isn't a source of pleasure at all for women is flat out wrong and depressing.
"Say What?"
See, now how in the world is any of that considered education? Would you teach addition without using numbers? It's sex people. It's a part of the everyday cycle of life. Some of those responses are truly shocking. I would have laughed out loud even at a young age. It all sounds made up. Oh wait most of that was. Shall we continue?
"Dress" for the occasion...
My girlfriend's sex Ed program in middle school included a wedding dress that they splattered with red paint.
I'm assuming it symbolizes the blood of first sex, which, if is before marriage, taints the pureness of the ritual and thus ruins everything. TLDR sex bad don't screw before ring. Idiots.
For the Girls
We were shown a video where a lady said she could tell if a girl was a virgin just by looking into her eyes. The implication was that premarital sex causes your spirit to die so that you become just a shell with nothing to offer.
Edit to add: I'm sure you can guess that she didn't say the same applied for the boys, as if teenage girls are the only ones to blame for anyone having premarital sex.
At Once?
Seth Meyers Lol GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphyHaving sex with 1 person is like having sex with 100 people.
No Sharing!
The instructor gave all the boys in the class chewing gum and let them chew on it for a few minutes. Then she asked them if any of them wanted to share. Of course none did. Then she asked if they didn't want to share gum, why would they want to share sex partners?
This was in a co-ed class so all the girls in the class got to see too.
We Pray ALOT!!
golden girls blanche GIF by HULUGiphyI was taught in school that self pleasure was also a sin. So as a young girl discovering her body, every time I masturbated, I'd cry because I thought I was going to hell.
I don't know how many times I prayed to God asking for forgiveness.
No Hugs
My dad pointed to a teenage couple hugging when i was a kid and told me thats how you get pregnant.
Months later at the fair my aunt put my 5 yr old cousin on the back of my horse and told him to wrap his arms around my waist to hold on. My heart sank. Later that day I shamefully told my dad that my 5 yr old cousin got me pregnant.
In Dublin
So I'm Irish and Catholic.
Growing up in Dublin we had church sanctioned sex education, some of the highlights:
-All penises are the same size when erect (we were 14 and this was hilarious to us)
-Being gay is just a phase
-No method of birth control is reliable (including oral sex and body rubbing).
Let's Talk
Opposite story: I went to a Catholic high school. My Health teacher was a progressive. So she closed the door and said "Listen, ok, sure, masturbation is a sin or whatever, but it's actually fine. You gotta, you know, clean out the pipes once in a while. Now if your friends ask you to go to the movies and your answer is 'Sorry, gotta stay home and masturbate' probably step it back a bit."
Used Up
Bubble Gum GIF by QuavoGiphyThis woman once compared a teenage girl who's had premarital sex as chewed up bubble gum. She then switched the comparison to a pair of worn out shoes. Crap you not.
Moist Issues
I was convinced that saliva was involved in the baby-making process. Not that you'd kiss someone and then boom pregnant, but that someone's saliva over time would make their baby look like you. The more saliva, the stronger the resemblance.
Long story short I spit in my cousin's drinks for a solid 2 months because I wanted her baby (she was pregnant at the time) to look like me (who was 8)
ETA: this was about 25 years ago, and also I'm a woman! That's how absolutely terrible my sex education was.
Um... Next Question
The teacher said that you can only really love one sexual partner and that's why it's so important that your spouse be your first and only partner. One of my classmates raised her hand and said, "My mom died when I was a baby and my dad's been married to my stepmom for ten years. Does that mean he only loves one of them?"
The teacher just looked uncomfortable and moved on to how premarital sex causes depression.
Oh Utah
This is probably pretty tame, but Sophomore year our teacher told us using multiple condoms at a time increases its effectiveness.
I then asked my mom the same thing, and her whole job is to teach safe sex to youth.
Spoiler alert: do not layer condoms. It sounds good in practice, but you're actually weakening the condoms and wasting them.
Utah's sex ed policy was/is crap.
Wonder why...
lucy liu film GIFGiphyWent to public school and had real sex ed but had a history teacher who told us that sex before marriage is a sin, because every time you have sex you get pregnant.
And if a kid is born outside of wedlock they are going to hell and we will also go to hell for damning the baby's soul before it's even born. She said condoms and any other birth control is an insult to God and a way for atheists to try and outsmart him. She didn't work there after that year. Wonder why...
What Works
Condoms don't always work so it's better to not use them.
If you ejaculate on a girl (yes, "on") she will get pregnant. Regardless of if you had sex or not.
Boys get so horny sometimes they can't control themselves. So girls, it's up to you to remove temptation for the boys.
Birth control pills disrupt a girl's hormones so badly she will become barren.
Pieces of Me
That every time I (a girl) had sex I was giving away a part of my soul. So each sex partner whittled away bits of my soul. If I had sex before marriage my God-given husband would only get a tiny scrap instead of a full half and thus wouldn't be able to love me as much as he would if I'd waited? Honestly it's pretty confusing. This was taught in my Christian private school.
I can't with any of that. It's really shameful. We can't send kids out into the world misinformed. It will only lead to people learning in ways that are even more worrisome. And most parents don't seem comfortable enough to chat about it. Loosen up people. The future of generations is at stake. I'm not saying don't practice abstinence but let's explore all of the options as well. Sex. Say it. Do it. Safely.
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