Female genital anatomy is not some mystical unlockable box holding an ancient curse or anything complicated like that.
Still, men often seem to struggle to understand it.
Reddit's here to help.
Reddit user Slow-Bluejay9648 asked:
"Girls, what should men know about the vagina?"
So listen, let's have a quick anatomy lesson, shall we?
All humans start out as "female" - fetuses don't develop "male" anatomy til later in the game and obviously not all of them do. It can be easier to understand anatomy if you understand that men and women are built from the same stuff.
Men are just women, the re-mix.
LowerRo Oops GIF by Rosanna PansinoGiphy
"For the first timers, the hole where you put the peni in is a little lower than you think."
"That was definitely a surprise the first time lol"
"I think we just assume you guys have your stuff where we have ours and vice versa. That's why so many girls ask questions like 'what happens when you ride a bike.' "
"Fun fact, the 'seam' in a guy's scrotum is the result of their vagina closing up when they develop male body characteristics in utero."
"That really puts it into perspective."
"As a kid you’d think the opening and the penis were in the same location. But since your penis is analogous to their clitoris, which is above the opening, you have to go much lower."
"We don’t pee out of it."
"This is too hard to comprehend."
"Women have two holes other than the anus."
"One that is their vagina and then they have another hole higher up that is the urethra. But the urethra is really tiny so it's not really visible at quick glance."
"Female anatomy is glossed over so quickly in early schooling, so lots of people - women included - didn't realize there are three holes for women, not two."
"I’m a full grown woman and I didn’t really understand that the uterus wasn’t just a big vacant sac in my body until I was like almost 30. It’s shameful! Sex education really needs to be revamped."
Moans = Same
"When we moan out in pleasure it does not mean speed up or do it 'harder.' It means keep doing exactly what you're doing."
"I literally have to remind my husband of this ALL THE TIME. Stop speeding up when you’re literally doing PERFECTLY."
"There's no harm in a little correction if they change what's working in the moment... 'no, don't stop, just like that...perfect.' "
"A moan is just a moan. Use your words to get what you want/need."
Acid SpitJames Cameron Aliens GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy
"Vaginas are quite acidic, to the point were discharge can bleach under garments."
"I buy my vajayjay cute panties and the b*tch thanks me by ruining them. 😠"
"When I was young I was confused because I thought the discoloring on panties was a sign of being dirty."
"Turned out I just have a very high ph."
"A lot of men (and women) think the discolored underwear is a sign of the woman's vagina being 'dirty' when it's not at all."
"Just because your ex liked certain things doesn‘t mean your current partner does. Communication is key and porn not a good teacher."
"It always baffles me that people don't seem to talk that much before/during/after."
"Sex in a relationship gets even better if you know what your partner likes, so be attentive and talk about it. Obviously don't overdo with the questioning, but a bit goes a long way."
"Don't be shy about 'Does this work for you? Can we try x? Do you mind if i wear my fluffy earmuffs while we do it?' "
"It doesn't help that many people just expect you to know what they do/don't like."
"They assume since you've had previous partners you should know how to 'please any man/woman.' Had a couple experiences where the lady would get a bit pissy because I ask a few questions to find out what she's feeling while I'm doing something."
"I would honestly be super disappointed in my partner if they didn't ask questions. I don't care if you've had 0 or 300 partners, don't assume."
"Hell, ask me as much as you want, it shows you care enough to want to really, truly please me"
The Mother Of All Myths
"The hymen has nothing to do with your virginity."
"People really do describe it like a freshness seal."
"Pop it open and you have 3 days to consume the vagina before it spoils, 4 if you refrigerate it."
"Also it’s not common the hymen completely covers the vagina."
"Most of us still have our damn hymen and it just stretches open- it’s very obvious when you know what it looks like!"
"And also that there are so many different types of hymens that we don't get taught about."
"I thought I was a freak of nature because of my weird hymen."
"Turns out it's called a septate hymen."
"That the vagina is the inside of the female genitalia."
"If you’re referring to the outer genitalia like clit or labia, that’s the vulva."
"Over 90% of the clitoris is internal. What most people call the clit is the clitoral glans."
"Ive been scrolling forever looking for someone commenting on this, thank you for pointing it out because I think more people should know this!"
"My genitalia is more than just the hole where things go in."
"But I agree with comments saying that there are no good words in English if you dont want to use 'p*ssy'."
"Imagine if we started to refer to the male genitalia as 'the shaft' or something like that. There are other fun things to also play with down there ;) "
" 'Vulva' is just the exterior stuff, 'genitals' takes you all the way to the ovaries. Is there no in between word?"
"The vagina reverts to its original snugness."
"It shrinks after babies. Your penis is meaningless to it."
"This! Women push babies out and go back to normal afterwards, sometimes the vagina even gets tighter after birth."
Your Potential Pool
"Dudes, if you openly use terms like 'meat curtains' or make fun of different types of labia, I can guarantee you that you have minimized your potential hookup pool."
"A) it can make a woman (who may have otherwise been interested) insecure."
"B) Women can’t help what their labia looks like."
"C) it’s a turn off to hear people talking bad about others’ bodies- just like it’s sh*tty for women to make fun of penis size."
"Making fun of body parts isn’t cool or sexy."
"Ramming a penis that's dry on the sides into the vagina because its "kinda" wet does not feel good."
"If they're moving uncomfortably while you're trying to stick it in thats probably why. Either spread the wet to cover entire vag area outside or make the sides of your dick wet."
"Edit: for clarity. Friction doesn't equal pleasure. No one wants to feel rug burn on their delicates."
Proof This Thread Works
"Okay so man here."
"I came across this thread yesterday and didn’t think much of it except it made sense. But not in an eye-opening way."
"A couple of ‘sessions’ ago, my wife asked me to slow down and I realized how much longer I could last just by that little bit of criticism. But there was still that instinctual rush to finish."
"Anyway, so last night, things got hot and heavy and I remembered this thread and made an effort to actually slow down and just keep doing what I was doing when she reacted well."
"Wow. Oh my god."
"I’m not going to go into details, but um…this was a big improvement."
"So from a man who has only ever been with his wife, thank you for this."
Before You Get Into It
"1) Don't learn sex from porn."
"We can tell what men have learned sex from porn. Vs. Having a long term girlfriend where men get comfortable asking questions and taking feedback."
"Most things in porn are done to look good, not because they feel good."
"2) Sex is extremely intimate, be comfortable with the person you're banging before banging them."
"Talk, ask them about their relationship with sex, approach to sex, what they are into etc...before you get into them."
"I haven’t seen this one here yet: when a woman is aroused the vulva swells up like a plum because blood is flowing thru."
"It may also slightly change color depending on her skin tone."
"Honestly…you don’t have to know anything."
"Just be open to communicating & hearing what your partner has to say about what pleases her."
"That’s it. Boom."
"You can't hold the blood in when your period hits."
"I seriously hate it when guys say: 'oh just hold it.' "
"I WISH I COULD DO THAT WITH MINE!! IF ONLY!!"
"The school system will say that guys shouldn't know that since its not their business. 😬 It should be!"
"Cause then if they know about it he'd be a 10x better boyfriend, father, friend, and human for that."
"It seems to be very underrated of guys knowing female bodies and how they work and what is and isn't healthy."
"As a kid, I always thought vaginas must be really tasty, like sweet n all because I'd seen men just feast on it in porn."
"Boy was I disappointed when I learnt it's just... skin. Same old salty skin."
"Discharge is normal and unlike body hair (which we can control, but sometimes choose not to, which is totally okay) we literally can’t control when it comes or doesn’t."
"So don’t call it gross because that’s equivalent to shaming somebody for living."
"Not everyone who has a vagina necessarily has a G-spot."
"Try not to get so offended when someone can't finish from fingering/penetration alone. Some people find that hard because their bodies simply aren't built that way."
"Be tactful with your comments on appearance."
"I dated a blithering idiot who went down on me and literally said 'wow that's the biggest one I've even seen!' not in a sexy way like a woman would say about a man's dick."
"It instantly annoyed me. I still don't know if he was talking about my clit or my labia which are - at most - both slightly bigger than average."
"It was 5 years ago and I still think about that moment when I realised in a millisecond that I didn't want to be involved with that man."
"Have a filter don't just blurt out dumb shit that comes to your mind. It just makes you look and sound very inexperienced and unsexy."
What major vaginal misunderstandings have you witnessed in your life?
Sound off in the comments!
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We all make mistakes.
It's simply human nature.
But that doesn't mean we don't often find ourselves frustrated when other people make mistakes.
Particularly if these other people are our colleagues, resulting in having to clean up the mess they created.
Redditor xk543x was curious to hear about some of the worst, or most inane mistakes made by unreliable co-workers, leading them to ask:
"What's the dumbest mistake you've seen an incompetent co worker make?"
There's a reason we keep the boys away from the girls
"At a Petco all the Guinea pigs were in a big plexiglass enclosure with a center divider."
"Boys on one side and girls on the other."
"An employee decided that all the long haired Guinea pigs should be on one side and short haired on the other."
"It took forever to sort them out and all the females were pregnant."- PumpkinsDad
"Social worker here."
"We’re supposed to see clients who live with families once a year."
"A mom of a kid kept calling her worker but got no answer."
"Mom called the on call worker who discovered the assigned worker had logged the visits in and made thorough notes."
"The mom said she never saw her in two years."
"This led to her whole caseload being audited and then they found she had logged a visit with a client who’d been dead for months."
"While being audited, her supervisor decided to do a surprise visit to the client she was supposed to see."
"She never showed up and logged in the visit the next day."- ShiroHachiRoku
Slow and steady... gets you fired
"Had a guy take a cover off the base of a radar unit which had like 40 bolts holding it on."
"Gave him a ratchet wrench to do it."
"Half hour later I go check on him, only had about 10 off. "
"Watched him a bit."
"He would take it off each time to move it for the next turn!
"Showed him how a ratchet works."
"Never assume people know stuff." - User DeletedSloth Dmv GIFGiphy
"Tried to cool down hot oil, in a chute, all ready to be emptied, with a nice big bucket of water."
"I heard 'THOMAS NO' only to turn around and see a GEYSER of hot oil shooting towards the ceiling before it hit and splashed down around him."
"Nobody was hurt some f*cking how."
"The chute that the oil was in was on wheels and had a wooden handle, it absolutely didn’t need to be cooled lol."- Ohiolongboard
How to make a bad situation even worse
"I worked on a golf course during the summer."
"Area with lots of poison ivy."
"Two of my coworkers were instructed to weedy a river edge area."
"If we encounter poison ivy, we either stop what we are doing or go get full suit protection with respirators."
"These dumba**es were weed whacking in the thickest poison ivy I had ever seen."
"No protective suit or glasses or respirator."
"I roll up and notice what the hell they're doing and point out all the poison ivy everywhere."
"They were aerosolizing the oil."
"They both ended up in the hospital on steroid to prevent their death because of the oils they inhaled."- Onwisconsin42
"30 days has September..."
"The designer, creative director and head of production all missed that there was an eight day week on a calendar."
"We sent 10000 copies of a useless calendar to a client."
"Rightly so, they refused to pay for it."- atot806animation domination calendar GIF by gifnewsGiphy
Isn't that why they call it long division?
"Not a mistake necessarily, but I once witnessed our chief accounting officer, and our only accountant; it was a small company, type in values into two Excel cells, pull out a calculator, add the two numbers together in the calculator, and then type the answer in a third cell."
"She had apparently been doing this for years, with sheets consisting of thousands of rows."
"I explained how to use formulas and copy them but she apparently forgot because I saw her doing the same thing again months later."- zachm26
Isn't that what these pockets are for?
"When I worked construction, there was a guy who showed up with nothing in his tool belt except a small bag of peanuts in one pocket."
"He didn't stay around too long."- Incredible_mangoeat season 15 GIFGiphy
Maybe a little guidance and help was all it took to put these colleagues on a better path forward.
But one imagines the only path these less-than-star employees found themselves on was right out the door.
There's nothing more embarrassing than laughing at a story someone just told, or a question someone just asked, under the assumption that they were joking.
Only to realize a few seconds later that they weren't joking.
It happens to the best of us.
In some cases, these can be bizarre stories which we might laugh about months or years down the road.
Though more often than not, we immediately feel a foot slamming into our mouth with a vengeance.
Redditor tatemalia was eager to hear the wildest, most embarrassing of these unfortunate moments, leading them to ask:
"What's your 'Oh..You're not joking' moment?"
Oh, bless your heart.
"Had an old lady ask me when her dog would grow its leg back after an amputation."- Moctor_Drignall
Don't mind if I do
"I was eating ice cream and an old guy walking into the ice cream parlor said, 'Oh, that looks good! I'm gonna get a spoon'."
"I smiled and laughed awkwardly, until his damn spoon was in my ice cream."- KnittingTrekkie
Feedback is greatly appreciated
"It was when I met up with an online friend for the first time."
"It was surprisingly more fun than I thought it would be."
"By the end of the night, as we were waiting to get served at a restaurant, she looked at me and asked how I thought our outing went."
"I told her that I had a great time."
"But that didn't seem to do it for her."
"She proceeded to tell me about how she does this thing, at the end of every outing with her friends, where she rates and gives feedback on how well it went, what didn't go so well, and what could do with some improvement for next time."
"I laughed it off, thinking she was joking."
"It all felt too robotic and school-like for me to take seriously."
"But she definitely was serious."
"I told her to go first so I could get an idea of what she wanted and, I kid you not, she whipped out her phone and started drafting up multiple paragraphs for about 7 minutes or so."
"I felt so awkward because it was also 7 minutes of pure silence and deep concentration."
"Thankfully, I had to leave mid-way because I was needed elsewhere."
"I told her to just text me her thoughts when she was done but she insisted that that wasn't the way to do it, and it HAD to be done in person."
"I still can't believe this is something her and her friends regularly do."- reigndrops17season 10 episode 22 GIFGiphy
We'll take the house, no need for a bag.
"Working in a catalog store in the UK."
"You pick from the catalog, we bring it out from the warehouse."
"Lady comes in and orders the single largest thing we keep in store."
"A shed. "
"Not a particularly big shed as sheds go, but still a shed."
"'Ok madam if you give me your vehicle's registration number I'll tell the security guys to let you round the back of the store'."
"'Park in bay five and we'll load it for you'."
"'What are you talking about?'"
"'You have to park around back so we can load it into your vehicle'."
"'I don't have a vehicle'."
"'Oh, well, we have the numbers for some white van men and taxi services if you'd like to...'"
"'No just bring it up, Keith can carry it'."
"She indicates a portly man of around 50 across the room'."
"We got it into the lift diagonally, though it trapped a man behind it, and when it came up she said 'what on earth is that?'"
"'That's your shed, madam'."
"'My Keith can't carry that!'"
"'Yeah no sh*t, would you like me to call a van service for you?'"
"She actually just got a refund and left."- reverendmalerikRace Shed GIF by CBSGiphy
That's not yours, its mine!
"I work at a hotel."
"We have this regular who comes, but usually makes reservations ahead of time, and she has her 'favorite' room she tries to get."
"Well one day she walked in, asking for a room."
"I had rooms available, but not the one she wanted, and she replied 'oh, call the guests in that room and tell them to move out so I can have it'."
"I seriously thought that was a joke and I played along, saying 'I'll get right on that,' as I was getting her info in the computer."
"All of a sudden she said, 'aren't you going to call them?'"
"'Those guests in that room so I can have it'."
"'Oh, you really weren't joking'."
"I told her that we don't do that, if she wanted that room she needed to call ahead."
"'I have a room, I know it's not your preferred room but it's all I've got, and you can take it or leave it, but I'm not moving a guest out'."
"She seemed almost taken aback by that, but I told her that if she didn't take the room I had she wouldn't get anything."
"She calls ahead now, but I was mortified and shocked she actually tried this stunt, and actually meant it."- llcucf80
What is the meaning of this?!
"Used to work at a big bank that bought out another, somewhat smaller but still pretty big bank about 10 years ago."
"Some guy came in all pissed off because we didn't send him a new debit card with the new bank's logo on it."
"They intentionally made it so the old ones would continue working until they were originally set to expire."
Said it was "'embarrassing'."
"'I can't be the only person who's gotten upset over this, right?'"
"Yeah homie, you were."- giantgooseGiphy
It's easy to understand how these poor people thought what they had just heard was a joke.
One imagines, going forward, they might wait to laugh until after the people they were talking to start laughing.
Being cheated on is a horrible feeling.
And some would say that cheating on your significant other is inexcusable.
Perhaps that's why when partners come up with excuses and reasons as to why they cheated often make these situations so much worse.
But in some cases, these excuses might end up lightening the situation, owing to the sheer idiocy of these justifications.
Redditor tall_boizz was curious to hear the lamest, most ludicrous excuses people were given from their unfaithful partners, leading them to ask:
"What is the dumbest explanation you've heard from someone who cheated?"
I saw you yesterday!
"I missed you."
"I was on a short vacation."- haynb03
It's not me, it's you
"'If you had confidence in yourself, none of this would have happened'."- marques33
Well, you did
"'I didn't want to hurt you'"
"Way to go, dude."- taalnerd
It was out of grief
“'My grandmother died'.”
"I didn’t realize cheating on your girlfriend is the standard grieving method." - User DeletedTears Crying GIFGiphy
I'm only monogamous in the city I'm in.
“'When you said you wanted to be exclusive I thought you meant exclusive here'."
"'You never even asked if I had a boyfriend'.”
"I had been 'dating' this girl for 3 months in college when she admitted that she had been in a long distance relationship with her boyfriend from high school the entire time and she had slept with him each time she visited her parents, which was at least once a month."- dring157
"'You deleted your Facebook, and my friend and I thought that was fishy'."
"I don't even know where to start with that kind of rationality."- RandylVlarsh
We were just too perfect
"'We never have any fights'."
"So you decide to cheat so I can get mad at you?"- somerandomredditor18vanessa williams GIFGiphy
“'I wanted to try something new'.”
"He cheated on me with his ex."- meeez80
Quid Pro Quo... OOPS!
"‘I thought you were doing it too!’ "
"F*ck him!"- mawo77
I had to compartmentalize
"A friend in a long-distrance relationship who only saw his GF on weekends because she was at an army posting at the other end of the country during the week."
"He found out she was cheating on him with some guy."
"'Well, for me the army and my private life are two different lives, so it makes sense I have two different boyfriends'."
"For context, I'm from Germany, this was the German army, and 'the other end of the country' was about six hours by train, the train being free for soldiers."fox broadcasting sleeping GIF by The OrvilleGiphy
When people need to dig up excuses as laughable as these, it's often because they are well aware they were in the wrong.
Hopefully, the unlucky partners of this unfaithful, motley crew can take solace in the fact that they are now much better off.
Usain Bolt's 9.58 second 100-meter dash at the 2009 IAAF World Championships.
2,019 people performing "mattress dominoes" in Rio De Janeiro in 2019.
Audra McDonald's six Tony award wins and being the only actor to win in all four acting categories.
These are only a few of the most notable, and unusual world records that have yet to be beaten.
Records some even think might never be beaten.
Redditor badblackguy7 was curious to hear what other world records people think will never be broken, leading them to ask:
"What is a record, sports or otherwise, that will likely never be broken?"
Let's hope so!
"FDR being elected US president 4 times."- holyhellnothingworks
Unbroken thanks to modern technology
"The Lion King as the highest VHS sales of all time."- Fawqueue
Once in a lifetime
"Jacque Villeneuve, Michel Schumacher and Heinz Harald Frentzen set the exact same time in qualifying in the 1997 European grand Prix."
"To the THOUSANDTH of a second."- DaBi5cu1t
Do NOT try this at home
"Oh I know this one."
"When I was a kid, we had a Guinness book of records lying around that we liked to browse in while bored."
"There was this one guy in it who held a record for most bikes eaten."
"No, you did read that right."
"He ground up a bike and slowly consumed it over I don't know how long a time."
"The record was accompanied by a note that no further records of bike eating would be accepted, as it was deemed too dangerous."- PicajosanGiphy
They made sure this will never happen again
"The longest professional tennis match of all time."
" John Isner vs Nicolas Mahut at Wimbledon 2010."
"It lasted 11 hours 5 minutes, spanning 3 days of play, with a final score of 6-4, 3-6, 6-7, 7-6, 70-68"
"It was already nearly twice as long as the previous record holder."
"The reason it will likely never be broken is that every professional tournament except for one, Roland-Garros, now has tiebreaker rules that limit the number of games that can be played in final sets."
"Although it’s hypothetically possible at RG, clay court tennis is not at all conducive to the serve-and-volley style of play that led to the insanely long 5th set of Isner-Mahut."- MSims2992
"California here I come..."
"The current record for the Cannonball Run, a drive from NY to LA, is about 25.5 hours."
"It was set in May of 2020, and the drivers were able to make use of the lack of traffic due to the pandemic to break the record."
"Barring another similar world changing event, traffic conditions will probably never be what they were when that record was set."- SexyNeanderthal
Any other challengers?
"887 wins to 2 losses."
"Entered 9 world championships and never lost a bout in them."- minorboozerLoop Spinning GIF by WWEGiphy
Winning is just showing up.
"Glenn Hall played 502 consecutive games as an NHL goalie."
"Zero chance that will ever be broken, goalies these days rarely play more than 3/4 of an 82-game season, let alone numerous seasons without a night off."- ButtholeQuiver
"Surprised no one mentioned the unlimited water speed record."
"The current unlimited record is 511.11 km/h (317.59 mph)."
"Achieved by Australian Ken Warby in the Spirit of Australia in 1978."
"It hasn’t been broken to this day due to how dangerous it is to go at those sort of speeds on the surface and plenty of people have passed away trying."- Sliiated
"I'll be waiting, waiting for you..."
"The longest non consecutive billboard 200 album streak belongs to none other than, The Dark Side Of the Moon by Pink Floyd."
"It currently has been on the chart for 962 weeks."
"Second in line is Legend, by Bob Marley and the Wailers, at 733 weeks, meaning Marley and the wailers would need almost 4.5 years of time on the charts, with Floyd being absent, in order to take the number one spot."- Floyd-Van-Zeppelinmoving pink floyd GIFGiphy
There is a likely chance that these records will never, in fact, never be broken.
But one has little doubt that people will continue to try.
And power to anyone attempting to sell more video cassettes than The Lion King.