Notable People Who Died Before They Could Realize Their Full Potential
Reddit user rigorousthinker asked: 'Which person who died too early in life had the most potential?
When someone dies young, people often lament they're "gone too soon."
Death comes for us all eventually, but sometimes it's especially shocking when a person on the cusp of greatness dies—often tragically.
Reddit user rigorousthinker asked:
"Which person who died too early in life had the most potential?"
Henry Mosely
"Henry Mosely, a British physicist."
"One of the greatest physicists of the 20th century. Developed Moseley's Law that helped to define the atomic number."
"The reason why nobody has heard of him is because he [was killed by] sniper at Gallipoli when he was 27 years old."
"Isaac Asimov wrote about him: 'in view of what [Moseley] might still have accomplished ... his death might well have been the most costly single death of the War to mankind generally'."
"He's the reason why countries keep their scientists and researchers from being drafted or allowed to fight anymore."
~ Vio_
GiphyÉvariste Galois
"I'd forward Évariste Galois."
"At the cutting edge of mathematics, as a teenager solved a centuries standing open problem, and created a field of mathematics which was so complex at the time that Galois' contemporaries were stymied and overlooked it's value."
"He was killed in a duel at the age of 20."
~ butts-kapinsky
Arthur Tudor
"I'm going historical. Prince Arthur Tudor. He died aged 15, leaving his younger brother Henry to become Henry VIII of England."
"Arthur was apparently more of a scholar than anything else, compared to his brother who was more into the idea of being a warrior king."
"Had Arthur survived and gone on to become King, then global history would have taken a very different turn."
~ c0_sm0
"Many of those priceless manuscripts existed nowhere outside of England because they were written in English. Back in the ninth century, the West Saxon king Alfred the Great had established an educational system where children learned to write their native language first before learning Latin."
"The Anglo-Saxon Chronicle is in English because of that. Beowulf was written down in English because of that. The Old English they spoke then is practically indecipherable now except to scholars, yet English is still the best documented secular language of the early Middle Ages."
"Only a tiny sliver of that literature survives. Mostly because Henry VIII had the rest of it burned."
~ doublestitch
GiphyThe Classics
"Amadeus Mozart.
"While he wasn't terribly young, I'd say his true potential life was cut in half. Imagine what music will never be or where it could have gone had he lived a longer life."
~ WhoFan
"35 IS terribly young. And throw Franz Schubert in this thread as well. Died at 31 and was writing some of the greatest music ever produced."
"Just for the final 2 movements of the Unfinished Symphony alone! Supposedly on his deathbed he said 'I have so much still to say'."
~ 8805
"And Chopin, too. Died age 39, was writing the greatest piano works ever."
~ BreadBoi-0
"Shout out to my boy Felix Mendelssohn, died at the age of 38. Wrote 4 amazing symphonies, the famous music for A Midsummer Night's Dream, and the greatest violin concerto in the repertoire."
"I'd give anything to see what he would have done with another 38 years."
~ Plug_5
Otis Redding
"Otis Redding."
"Based on his energy, the fact that after a short career with an amazing voice, he came back from surgery with a better one, recorded one of the great songs of the 20th century, and then immediately died."
~ TDOMW
"Otis is interesting to me. He died right before he was going to crossover to white audiences."
"What would Dock of the Bay sound like if he got to finish it and realize his vision (he had kind of a Pet Sounds vision for the full album)?"
"If he didn’t die, would soul have lost so much ground to funk in the 1970s?"
"And would Stax Records still be around and thriving, instead of closing in the mid-1970s?"
"All interesting questions."
~ ChocolateOrange21
GiphyAlan Turing
"Alan Turing—died for the worst f*cking reason and what happened to him was a travesty."
~ Far-Polaris
"Turing was prosecuted in 1952 for homosexual acts. He accepted hormone treatment with DES, a procedure commonly referred to as chemical castration, as an alternative to prison."
"Turing died on 7 June 1954, 16 days before his 42nd birthday, from cyanide poisoning. An inquest determined his death as a suicide."
~ DimesOHoolihan
"If you're unfamiliar with Turing and what he did for the world (and also the punishment he had to endure after the fact), I highly recommend watching The Imitation Game."
"It's a phenomenal movie, and Benedict Cumberbatch plays the role of Turing amazingly. It really drives home how extra terrible his death was, considering all of the good he did for the war effort."
"We likely would have lost the war (or struggled through it for a lot longer, and lost many more innocent lives) if not for him."
~ TenFoxxe
Roberto Clemente
"Roberto Clemente was going to be a great humanitarian and role model after he retired. Charity and helping the people of the Caribbean and Latin-America was really important to him and he spent almost all his free time doing charity work.
"He played 18 seasons for the Pittsburgh Pirates, 13 seasons as an All-Star, played in 15 All-Star games, 12 Gold Glove Awards."
"Clemente was the first Caribbean and first Latin-American player to be inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. He was the first for many things in his career."
"MLB was only integrated for 8 years when Clemente started playing in 1955. What Jackie Robinson did for Black players, Clemente did for Caribbean and Latin-American players. Just think of all the MLB stars he paved the way for."
"The Roberto Clemente Award is given to the player who 'best exemplifies the game of baseball, sportsmanship, community involvement and the individual's contribution to his team'."
"His friends and teammates described him as a humble, kind man. He was 38 when he died in a plane crash delivering humanitarian aid to earthquake victims."
~ LakotaGrl
GiphyStevie Ray Vaughn
"Stevie Ray Vaughan."
"He really got his sh*t together and seemed to really be in a good place career wise and in his personal life."
~ 1-21_Jiggawatts
"Dude played the cleanest guitar I've ever heard. No missed notes or leaning on too much feedback or too many effects or anything."
~ loptopandbingo
Steve Irwin
"Steve Irwin—I believe his conservation work would have probably spilled over into environmental issues and he seemed passionate about doing good not just fame and money."
~ No_Character_5315
"He is my inspiration."
"I was in 6th grade when he died, and it took me some time to get here, but I currently have a degree in Forestry, Wildlife and Fisheries and I'm working on a second in Forestry conservation and restoration sciences."
"I'd like to think that one day I'll be able to make the world a slightly better place even if I'll never have the impact he did."
~ redwolf1219
"I think Robert and Bindi (and recently, Terri, too!) are doing great work to reach a modern audience with social media these days. Of course, nothing will ever be like The Crocodile Hunter ever again."
"That show was a gem of its time. I still grieve Steve when I watch their content, especially when they show clips of him. But it's so cool to watch his family carry on his legacy."
~ only_1_
GiphyJeff Buckley
"Within the sphere of music, I think Jeff Buckley is unquestionably the answer."
"'Grace' is an absolute tour de force of a debut and my easy pick for best album of the 1990’s. He was an almost indescribably incredible vocalist and fantastic young songwriter who likely would have only gotten better at his craft."
"It’s such a shame he never got to finish that second album because even what we have of it contains some gems and I’m sure the finished product would have been incredible."
~ dcrico20
Buddy Holly
"Buddy Holly. Of course, he already wrote some fantastic songs, but man would it be a treat to see his songwriting in the '60s!"
"Could end up being the same or he could have grown. But it's those what-ifs!"
~ DirtlessEye
"Buddy Holly was only 22 when he died. Lennon and McCartney had not peaked by that age, so who knows where he would have gone with his music."
"Buddy would have been 30 in the summer of 1967, the Summer of Love. Maybe he’d have been out playing in a toga in Golden Gate Park with shoulder length hair and granny glasses, protesting the war in Vietnam."
"Sadly, we’ll never know."
~ AtmosphereFull2017
GiphyDouglas Adams
"Douglas Adams."
"His ability to create the most absurd possible sentences and situations and make them as funny as they are... amazing writer."
~ shapiritowastaken
"The infinite improbability drive. The hyperspace bypass. The bowl of petunias. Really knowing where your towel is."
"So much happy silliness. Might just have to dig out my copy and read it again."
~ lurkerwholeapt
Martin Luther King Jr.
"Martin Luther King Jr. People remember him as some wise old man. He was 39 when he died."
~ FredTheLynx
"Martin Luther King Jr., Anne Frank, and Barbara Walters were all born in 1929."
~ miclugo
"It's actually crazy to think MLK could have feasibly lived past the 00's, even the 10's."
"Like, can you imagine THE Martin Luther King Jr weighing in on the 2016 election as an 85-year-old man?"
"What an alternate timeline that would be."
~ thattoneman
"Or if he lived to see Obama become President."
~ Currywurst_Is_Life
GiphyThomas Sankara
"Thomas Sankara was only 37 when he was assassinated."
"He brought through huge reforms in Burkina Faso in such a short space of time."
"He increased literacy massively and improved women's rights, also brought through vaccination programs and improved infrastructure."
"None of which was popular with the French."
~ shawbawzz
Jimi Hendrix
"Jimi Hendrix hadn't even reached his full potential when he died."
"Yet he is still regarded by many to be the best guitarist of all time."
"Imagine if he had lived."
~ CoatsBoi
"The man made sounds that no one had ever heard before in the history of humanity."
~ No_Net_1590
GiphyThe Good Doctor
"My husband. He was special to me yes, but he was important to his patients. We all know about the ER docs that are dismissive, condescending, and are just all around jerks. My husband, even at his most burnt out wasn’t like that. He was the type you pray you get."
"The one that will actually listen, who will figure out what’s going on. It didn’t matter if you were female, a POC, trans, or any combination. He was listening. He was going to treat your pain. He wasn’t going to send you home until he had an answer."
"I knew this about him, but it was confirmed by the patients that left messages on his obituary page. Sure he did the usual emergency med life saving things. But a car accident is easy. There’s no argument about whether or not a patient is hurt. It’s assumed something is wrong."
~ koolchicken
It was surprising just how young some of these people were when they died.
Who else do you think was gone too soon?
People Explain Which Topics We Should Stop Teaching Young Children
As adults, especially those who work with or have kids of their own, we have a responsibility to mold the young minds that will go on to be the adults of tomorrow. They are our future, and we owe it to them to raise adults that will be respectful and kind community members.
There are plenty of things we were taught as kids that we thought were harmless at the time. But years later those same things have become an issue.
We went to ask Reddit to learn about those issues that we should change for the next generation.
Redditor Ok-Department5749 asked:
"What should we stop teaching young children?"
Let's see how many of these things you heard when you were growing up.
Boys will be boys.
"That if someone is picking on them it means they like them. Gonna set them up for a lot of problems later in life."
"I have a personal beef with this one. The boy who harassed me because he 'just liked me' is now in prison for assault."
"Yep. I had my hair pulled and punched by a boy in third grade. Was told by both teacher and principal that it wasn't a big deal. Boys do that all the time and bedsides he probably just liked me."
"I hate that 'boys will be boys' crap."
"Boys will be boys is for when you and the boys decide to use plywood as a bike ramp, not when someone sexually assaults someone else."
You can't be everyone's friend, and that's okay.
"That everyone is your friend. It's not true. I had to tell my 9 year old niece that sometimes people aren't going to like her and it's just how it is. This broke her heart because there's a boy in her class who doesn't like her and she's been trying to win him over. She's so sweet and I hated having to tell her that."
"I am an ECE who works with school-age kids. My line is 'we aren't all friends here, and that is ok, but we have to treat everybody with respect/kindly'. I see lots of ECE's use the 'friend' terminology ex 'we don't hit our friends' 'your friends are trying to sleep'. I avoid the terminology like the plague."
"I've seen it backfire. I had a 7-year old tell me that it was ok that she hurt another child because the other child wasn't her friend (This was this particular child's first year with us)."
- gydzrule
"This is great because it helps kids learn to treat others with respect while also helping them manage their own expectations about immediately being friends with/like by everyone (which obviously isn't the case). It's a gentle introduction to reality that will save them a lot of trouble down the line. I mean, I really wish I had been taught to build confidence in myself rather than my confidence depending on whether or not other people liked/approved of me."
"The 2nd part to that lesson is learning that a relationship is only worth your time if both people like each other."
- Satchmoi
"More importantly, if both people respect each other."
We're equal.
"That they're more special than other kids. It's a recipe for future entitled adults."
"I think this is important, kids should know they are the most special kids to their parents, however they aren't the most special kids between all the kids in the world."
- Majo1118
"I think it's a setup for depressed kids when they don't end up as gifted as they are told they are."
Older doesn't always mean wiser.
"That just because someone's older doesn't mean they are right."
"Maybe we should teach the older generation that just because someone is younger doesn't mean they don't know what they're talking about. That is the problem I've seen."
"My husband's grandma gets mad when she's wrong. She always yells 'Respect your elders!'"
"Umm being wrong is just that. You find a correction and move on. Also, respect isn't just given. If you can't treat others the right way, no matter how many times you scream that stupid phrase at me, I won't respect you."
Kids deserve respect.
"That you can't disrespect adults but they can disrespect you."
Ali49130
"Or that even if you are right and the adult is wrong, the adult is still right."
max_anarchy
"Not long ago there was an incident in my city where a teacher got in a fight with a student. There's debate as to who is responsible for instigating, but the fact that the video shows the teacher antagonizing and pulling the kid's hair says plenty to students."
"Friends of mine were on social that night talking about years of terrible experiences with that teacher. He was a bully and a bigot with a record."
"The next day I told all my classes that they could always come to me with a concern about another teacher. A couple classes ended up discussing incidences for the rest of the period."
"Do high schoolers sometimes get self-righteous and dramatic? Absolutely. But I'd rather them speak out when something feels wrong than feel like no one would bother helping."
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Consent is important in all contexts.
"That not wanting to hug someone is rude."
"I have four nieces and see this happen to them a lot. The youngest one doesn't always remember me. Her older sisters give me hugs with delight and I always tell the youngest to hug me when she's okay with it. I hate hugging people when I don't want to so I'm not gonna subjugate her to something no one can stand. It's so freaking weird."
"Glad someone said this. Children need to be able to say no to unwanted physical contact."
Stop forcing your kids to eat.
"To finish the food on your plate if you're not still hungry. Note: don't waste food. Save leftovers if you can."
- jennkrn
"Was going to say the same thing. Kids are allowed to not like foods the same as adults. We have a 2 bite rule. I don't like avocado, so I don't eat it. My stepdaughter doesn't like green beans so I just don't put them on her plate. I never understood this or the clean plate thing. That can lead to eating disorders later on."
- tkp14
"Also doesn't help with sensory issues."
"My partner just can't handle the texture of 99% of vegetables. So I work around it with veggie noodles and blending vegetables. Since I love to cook, I love the challenge of making something healthy but working around the texture thing (I also have an aversion to some vegetables. Like cauliflower. I can't.)"
"To that end, cooking things in different ways is paramount. Don't just boil some green beans and call it a day. I used to hate collard greens until my mom made 'boozy' greens (I forgot what she put in them for liquor). Other people just boiled them and slapped them on a plate, but what she did was just more harmonious. Complex. Satisfying."
"Once I heard my aunt tell my nieces that they needed to eat everything on their plates, even if they didn't like it, because "someday you're going to start dating and you don't want boys to think you are a picky eater." I had a conversation with my own daughter later about how wrong that statement was."
"My brain audibly broke when I read that. Thank you for telling your daughter how wrong your aunt was."
Zero tolerance policies.
"Those 'zero tolerance policies' where you get detention because someone punched you in the back of the head make any f*cking sense."
- 4-stars
"I've never even heard a valid argument for this. It's always, 'You MUST have done something to incite this.' Like no, some people are just a**holes and you shouldn't be punished for their actions."
"The sole point of this is, and has always been, for school administrators to escape responsibility."
- 4-stars
"We had a student break the zero tolerance policy. He got jumped in the hallway, threw his hands out to his sides away from the attacker, and screamed that he wasn't fighting back and that he needed help. Once he went to the floor, he balled up and kept yelling. He was a bigger kid than his attacker and could have handled it, but chose to take the hits."
"When he got called to the office and the zero tolerance policy was brought up, he pointed out that he never fought back, screamed that he wouldn't to de-escalate the situation, and that he needed help like students are taught to do when they are being bullied. Having done everything right, it wasn't a fight, it was an assault and if they punished him for being assaulted under their care, his parents would be blasting this everywhere they could."
"He never got punished and the other kid was expelled."
"My solution to this is "no, I will tell you if you're in trouble after I hear what the school has to say." Detention is no big thing if your parents aren't adding on."
"Also zero-tolerance drug policies that punish for simple over-the-counter meds. I know girls that got expelled over Midol. Others for Tylenol."
"I'm 30 and still feel like I'm being judged if I take Motrin at my desk for a sore back."
Kids are smarter than we think.
"Their worries and concerns are small or silly. Stop making them feel dumb or embarrassed for saying or doing something wrong. Most of all, that it's normal for mom or dad to post those moments on their social media page. Just stop."
- Redditor
"There was a famous quote And it goes something along the lines of 'Don't put down whatever they feel the need to share with you whether it be big or small, because to them everything was big.'"
Everyone's got problems.
"'You think you have problems? Just wait until you're grown up and you'll find out what real problems are!'"
"I became an adult with real problems, but nothing that has happened (which includes several abusive relationships, not surprisingly) has been as horrific as being trapped in that sh*tshow of a childhood and not being believed nor having any power to defend myself or escape."
"But even if their problems really are relatively minor, denying or invalidating your kids' experiences is damaging in and of itself. They're not minor problems to them, have some fucking empathy."
No really means no.
"That saying No is rude. I wanna teach my kid it's ok to refuse something or just say 'no' without any reason."
"One of my friends has been working with her kids on 'hear my "no"' recently and I thought it was so cool. If you want a kid to stop bugging you when you say no, you have to make sure they understand they can say no too and that it's not a bad thing."
"At our place we always teach our kid to respect the no. On the flip side, we always respect the kid's no too. It goes both ways."
sortitall6
Boundaries and sharing are both important lessons.
"Stop making them share everything for the sake of sharing. Teach them to set healthy boundaries. Teach them about donations and charity. Teach them sharing in moderation. Teach them why we share. But dammit, stop forcing them to do it all the time because 'that's what kids are supposed to do.'"
"Right. Forcing someone to 'give' you a turn isn't sharing. Some 7/8 year old kid tried to pull this on my then 2 year old at the playground when he (my son) brought a really cool Tonka dump trunk. He tried to take it saying my son had to share. When I intervened, he told me my son had to share and give him a turn. I said, 'First of all, you taking it from him is not sharing. Second No. No he does not "have" to share. This is his truck. If and when he decides he's done playing with it, you may ask him for a turn. If he says yes you may have a turn, that is sharing. Do not try to take his truck again.' He got all angry and scowly and said he was going to tell his mom on me, I told him to go right ahead."
"At our house, unless you are clearly hogging an item just to be a jerk (which rarely happens), both boys (4,7) know that it is someone's turn until they decide they are done. You may ask for a turn, but they don't have to say yes. If you are the person who has the thing and you say no, you are expected to go find the person when you are done and let them know you are done and they can have a turn now. What really warms my heart, even though they say no about half the time, they rarely play more that 3 or 5 minutes before giving the thing to their brother."
"Don't think our house is squabble free, there are definitely still fights, even over turns sharing/turns."
It's out responsibility to care about the young people in our lives and raise them to be respectful members of the community. It starts with us.
Now that we know better, we must do better.
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People Break Down The Exact Moment They Realized They Were Getting Old
Life is sneaky sometimes.
We are often occupied with working, meeting deadlines, and keeping all our ducks in a row. Then suddenly, BOOM, the realization that we are physically or mentally not the same as when we were in our 20s cruelly slaps us in the face.
These reality checks can come in the form of random comments about our looks, or how our bodies feel the moment we get up out of bed.
"When did you realise that you are officially "not young" anymore?"
Age is just a number. Sure, but let's not talk about that.
Mutually Offended
"I was in my late 20s, at work talking with one of our new interns. I can't remember why but she asked how old someone was and I was like, 'I dunno, about our age?' She gasped and asked 'How old do you think I am??' Then I gasped and asked, 'HOW OLD DO YOU THINK I AM?!'"
"Anyway, that's when I realized I was 'not young' anymore."
The Fear Is Real
"I'm scared of teenagers now."
– -thegay-
"Just don't look them directly in the eyes."
– spp25
Nightclubbing is a thing of the past for these "old folk."
Club Patrons
"When I went to a nightclub last weekend and everyone looks like children..."
– smegly87
Checking IDs
"We went to a bar recently and the bouncer didn't check our IDs -- just us out of everyone going in. Fine. Then as we were leaving, the place was totally packed and I was outside waiting for my husband to come out and thought, 'We're the oldest people here by ten years at least.'"
"Then, to my relief, I saw an old guy in the crowd."
"Then, to my horror, I realized the old guy was my husband."
Reactions to pop culture references can give away your age.
The Not-So-Familiar Tune
"When a song I loved as a teenager appeared as an oldie on the radio."
Listenin' To The Oldies
"My 17-year old nephew has a girlfriend who's into 'the oldies' - you know, like Pearl Jam and Smashing Pumpkins. That made me feel old, lol."
– Tauber10
Hey, Mr. DJ
"I DJ'd a wedding a year ago and the groom asked me if I could play that one oldie…'Get Low' from Lil Jon."
Random injuries are a clear indicator our bodies are headed six feet under sooner than we think.
Getting Unhinged
"When I dislocated my jaw lying in bed yawning. Didn't even think it was even possible."
Sleeping Injury
"Similar, except I woke up with a sprained ankle. No sleepwalking, no weird sleep Olympics, just held it or twisted it weird while sleeping and sprained it."
"I have done this 3 times after turning 40."
"Don't turn 40, kids, stay in your 20's and 30's."
– DrEnter
No More Yawning
"It was free day, Sunday, bad weather outside, I was in bed lying on the side, chilling, reading a book when mid yawn I heard weird noise. I was never out of the bed so fast. By the time I got to the mirror I heard another snap and jaw went on it's proper place, but I had swollen left lower side of the face for another 3 days. Talked to my doctor next day and he said, I should not eat hard or any food that needs a lot of chewing for a week or 2 and not to open mouth too much. I am reminded of this every single time I yawn."
As a Broadway dancer, I still frequented auditions to get me to the next gig.
That was pretty routine for me. Lining up in the hall, waiting for my group to be called in to learn the choreography and be judged on the spot to determine if I was good enough to make it to the next round.
I was so used to being focused on making a good impression while in the audition. But one day, I had a moment and noticed I was the only dancer among a group of college-aged kids.
That was when I realized I was being aged out from the business, at least as a dancer.
If my weak joints and lower back pain weren't clear indications, seeing all those spring chickens kicking their legs for Jesus was the biggest clue that my time was up.
Well, I had a good run. Speaking of which, I should go ice that knee after tripping on the treadmill the other day. Oops.
Image by Frantisek Krejci from Pixabay |
Finance and financial management really needs to be a part of all school curriculums. Seriously, who needs PE every single year?
And what in the world is the point of a free period? Also, trigonometry... just no. Learning about how to make and properly handle money would change the outlook for everyone.
Learning that it doesn't grow on trees or that one day we'll have to make our own and turn on into survival... that seems like a more dire and useful life lesson.
Too many people make far too many stupid mistakes that keep them in debt and unhappy, and that can be avoided.
Redditor u/viKiKing0 wanted everyone to own to some mistakes involving money by asking:
What was the stupidest financial decision you ever made?
Talk about hindsight, I cry when I think about my past financial mistakes. And it all started with those damn CD deals... I hate you Columbia House!! Also, I believe several libraries have me on a watchlist, should I ever dare to rent another book without settling my debts.
No Thanks
Lift Off Moon GIF by StakinGiphy"My friend: hey you should buy these bitcoin things, they're only 20 cents each and it's sort of an interesting idea."
"Me: oh, yeah, sounds interesting... I'll look into it."
"Never looked into it."
- dedokta
Tasmania
"My now wife and I were renting a terrace house for $50 a week. The landlord who was a very strange cat offered to sell us the house if we paid the weekly rent for 10 years. Rent per year was about $2600 so for $26000 we would have owned a house. We were 20 years old and ten years was forever so we said no. That was my BIG mistake."
"To people who have asked: The house was in Tasmania. About 40 years ago. At that stage I was earning about $250 per week. It was double story, 2 bedroom terrace house. We bought a house about 6 years later for about $75000. We knew the landlord, he was divesting a lot of properties he owned."
Peanuts
"Was a 10-99 day trader out of college. Didn't pay taxes for a year or two. Making peanuts, IRS won't notice, right? The penalties were more than the original amount owed. Had to put $6,500 on a credit card (bad choice #2). Sent me on a 20 year whirlwind of credit card crappiness. Should have paid my taxes. Should have set up a payment plan with the IRS."
"Turning down the only 6-figure salary I've ever been offered because the job required travel for 6 months of the year. I could've spent a year or two there and then gone on to bigger and better things, seems like a reasonable sacrifice in retrospect."
- libra00
Be Smarter at 22
Dummy Feeling Dumb GIFGiphy"Getting a payday loan when I was 22. It was small and I got out of it, but I can get definitely understand how someone can get caught up it it and not get out."
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I'm so confused about this Bitcoin. Yay or Nay? Someone let me know. And lesson one for the youth, read all the fine print when signing off on loans. You'll never escape them.
Kim K Coin
Kim Kardashian GIF by KUWTKGiphy"Gotta be the Kim Kardashian app. I quickly established the need to delete it. As I was spending actual money. For fake clothes."
Years Later
"My ex and I moved in together. Paid half each for deposits and all the bills etc. I took out a 4k loan in my name and bought furniture with it, I also bought us a 1.5k bed on finance. My mistake was not getting it in writing that as I was paying the loans anything purchased with that would be mine. I walked away with an £800 telly and nothing else and was still paying the loan off for 1.5 years after I moved out. In the future, I will be keeping receipts and written agreements!"
Mismanagement
"Taking the advice of a financial advisor in 1996 to invest $5000 into a labor-sponsored mutual fund rather than buying Apple stocks like I wanted. Current value of mutual fund: $200 and in litigation for mismanagement Calculated value of Apple: $5,800,000."
- milesmac
Maxed Out
"I took out the max on my grad school loans because it was important that my ex was able to stay home to take care of our 2 year old daughter. It was a great decision for my kid, don't get me wrong, but I now have a mountain of loans that I thought we would use both our incomes to pay off. Instead she left me for a dude with more money."
- timp_t
Bad Baby
"A friend convinced me that Beanie Babies will continue to rise in value. I've lost over 25 thousand dollars I had "invested". Plus, I still pay every month for a storage unit to keep these toys."
Deep Cuts
"Joining Cutco. I only ever sold a few of the damn knives. However, I will admit that I like their products. I still use one on a regular basis and it's held up well."
Life lesson? Be smart. Enjoy your money but don't outspend your means. You're not a Kardashian. And be thankful for that. Also, money is never free. There is always a catch. Be aware!
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Marriage is often one of the most difficult forms of relationships for young couples.
The fun of dating becomes mixed with the hefty responsibilities that come with truly building a life with another person and integrating your lives together.
It is not easy, often it will fail, there are times that will be painful however, if two people truly want to grow together they will find ways to overcome challenges in ways that strengthen their bond.
Redditor DurableRestriction17 wanted to hear the serious marriage advice people had to offer.
They asked:
"Married couples, what advice would you give to young couples?"
Basing your relationship off of mutual respect, similar values, and practicing spiritually together (whatever that may look like or if applicable) are all ways to make sure you have deeper connections.
The best advice overall though is do not lose yourself in joining your partner.
They love you and giving up things you enjoy to please them often fosters a seed of resentment over time.
Schedule time for yourself to enjoy hobbies, and time for them too.
"If you don't spend time together you are GOING to drift apart.”
“We have been married for 13 years, together for 15. Spend quality time together. Shut off your phones and go for a walk, cook a meal together, find a hobby you both enjoy, heck, you can have a lot of fun just doing household chores together."
“If you don't spend time together you are GOING to drift apart. I was severely burned in a brush fire 5 years ago, and was diagnosed with brain cancer a year later. My burn broke me, I fell into a terrible pit of depression."
“I spent most of the next year lying on the couch pissed off at the world. All of my relationships deteriorated in that time just because I separate myself from everything. But our marriage suffered the most. Unfortunately, my diagnosis made things even worse. My prognosis was quite grim, people in my position live for an average of 37 weeks."
"I have seen other people go through similar things. One of two things usually happens. It will draw them closer together, or one or both people will use destructive coping mechanisms to help cope with the fear and pain. Once we realized what was happening we started coming closer together again."
"When we were newly married, we spend a lot of time fishing. Just the two of us on a riverbank sitting on buckets trying to catch fish. The beauty of time like that is there is nothing to distract you from each other. It gives you a lot of time to just talk and get to know each other better."
"I've had 2 cancer recurrences that looked like it was the beginning of my end. I just started a new treatment that is working very well. We've been able to get back fishing a lot this summer, sometimes just the two of us, and sometimes we take the kids along too." thelemonx
Well noted! Sounds like a healthy relationship.
You are on the same team!
“Fight the issue, not each other.” BlackSwann0316
“Yes! My husband and I have a rule to always treat each other like we're on the same team. Having an explicit rule comes in handy for giving us the language to use when it doesn't feel like one of us is doing that. A gentle "it doesn't feel like we're on the same team right now" does wonders for reorienting the other away from anger and toward the problem at hand.” wantonyak
I concur! Your partner is not–and should not–be your enemy.
“Always remember to work on yourself, as your insecurities can easily form into blame towards your partner. ‘They're not doing enough’, ‘they're not making me feel special enough’ when you're insecure and not doing anything to fix it, it won't matter what your partner does.”
“So Always work on yourself, invite your partner to join you in your goals and the positivity from your efforts will strengthen your relationship with your partner and how you see yourself.” Ello_Owu
Insecurity can kill a relationship. Working on yourself is important!
Dont sweat the small stuff.
“Don't stress over the little sh*t. You'll get annoyed at things you didn't think possible, like how they organize themselves, how they load the dishwasher, difference in opinions for trivial things. Let that sh*t go.”
“Think about what truly matters to you before you start an argument over your misplaced toothbrush, the color of paint to use in the living room or what's going on in the garage at 10pm with all the swearing. This will differ a bit, but this is coming from a man that's been married for 14 years with two kids.” Beholder84
Exactly! Besides, stress kills. Don't do that to yourself.
“don't keep score...”
“Do things your spouse enjoys, and don't keep score. For example, my wife loves going to soccer games but I don't, and I love horror movies but my wife doesn't. But I still go to games with her, and she still watches horror movies with me. Support each others hobbies and interests.“ LagerLounge
Relationships are all about balance! Support each other – that builds good relationships.
Kindness is best practice...
“Kindness. Don't be short, rude, and proud. You have to live with this person the rest of your life. Always be kind. Forgive. You aren't immune to making any of the same mistakes. You're not as perfect as you think you are. Don't dwell on the negative in one another. This is a bad mental path to get on.”
“You are both imperfect. Compliment one another on your strengths. And help one another with weaknesses. Be committed. Life will change. You both will change. There is security in commitment. There is trust when you feel secure. Just a few things. 12 years, three kids, still learning.” Manbeard1000
If you're going to ride the waves of life together, you'll have to learn how to be compassionate and forgive.
Remember later on you may forgive but your friends or family may not...
“Don't talk sh*t about each other to your friends or family members. You're a team. If you have a complaint and need to tell someone, be honest with your partner about it rather than telling a third party.” ruthlessbaderginz
Absolutely! You are a team so you should act like it.
So important!
“Make sure you have the same life vision as your partner. You need to be in alignment on the big things.” SeaTie
Compatibility definitely matters!
“If you want to survive more than a decade in a marriage, be prepared to listen to your spouse. Not just to let them speak, but listen (engage). You want to be heard, so hear the other.”
“If/when negative emotions get too intense, don't jump to blame the spouse... It's hard. Try to find ways to interrupt the feeding-of-negativity-from-each-other cycle. Take a 5 minute break (claim you need a biobreak if nothing else).. The physical and temporal distancing will help folk calm down.”
“Also, as soon as you calm down, hug the other person and provide some sort of positive physical contact. Goes without saying, keep reinforcing positives and make positive statements frequently. Everybody wants to be loved - and you have to be there for each other.”
“Oh, one last thing: don't ever take someone else's side against your spouse in public. If they are in the wrong (can happen often), you must find ways to correct that behavior discreetly... if that really doesn't work (because people are obstinate), try to create a distraction (find an excuse) then talk to your spouse in private.” milagr05o5
Some great advice from people with marriage experience. Best of luck to the young couples, it's wild out there.
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