Sex is something that should be passionate and intense and fun. And though it's been said it was an activity designed for two, adding a few characters to the story isn't a bad thing. As long as all the participants are stable enough to handle the situation why not experiment away. Just make sure it's all the right pieces to fill the puzzle.
Redditor u/eltroopay wanted to hear from those who have dabbled with others in their relationships by asking... People who have agreed to have a threesome with their partner and another person, how did it get agreed upon and how did it go?
it didn't live up to the hype,
"I've been in two threesomes: The first time, it was with two "friends" that later on turned out not to be very great friends. I don't talk to either of them anymore. The threesome itself was.. well, it didn't live up to the hype, if I'm putting it nicely."
"The second time was with my boyfriend and a close mutual friend. The close mutual friend had recently broken up with his girlfriend when I got a Facebook message from him: Basically it said something along the lines of "I've got something to ask you, I was wondering if you'd be down for a threesome?". I asked with who, and he said "You and Tyler (my boyfriend), I haven't asked him yet I figured I'd ask you first". I said it was okay, brought it up with my boyfriend and he said it was okay, too. We did it that night and it was a million times better than the first one." princess_bvmblebee
Happy Birthday!!!
Giphy"My SO arranged a threesome with her visiting college roommate (who I had some sexual experience with in college) as my gift for my 30th birthday. They made all the arrangements between themselves and surprised me with it. I was a little reluctant at first, thinking it was some sort of test. I gradually agreed to it. It was fun. It ended up being a few days of sex and nakedness. It is very unlikely to ever be repeated." picksandchooses
Oh Natural....
"I've done a few but I'll just mention the first. We didn't plan it out at all, or agree to it, it was just natural for both of us. We went to a nude beach together. There ended up being only three people there, us and a very attractive middle aged military guy (we were 22). We hung out in the sun together all day and got to know each other and smoked some weed. When you're young and hanging out in the sun nude, it's easy to get horny."
"Eventually, I don't remember who, made the first move. It just progressed really naturally. We had some really great sex for the rest of afternoon, I never experienced any jealousy. I've had threesomes since then, with two men and with two women and I always tell people, sex with two guys and one girl is way better." disciplinedsuccess
In the sixties....
Giphy"In the sixties, I made love to many, many women. Often outdoors. In the mud and the rain. And it's possible a man slipped in. There would be no way of knowing." TheLeviathaan
Best experience ever.
"I always had a thing for bisexual women."
"I had a friends with benefit chick who was bi."
"I got myself a girlfriend, who has never been with a dude before, I was her first and It was clear from the get go that she liked girls more, where she could be dominant, with a brute like me it was not a possibility."
"So, me being a considerate boyfriend, called up my fuck buddy and told her to join in. She came over."
"Let me tell you something, Lesbian porn is a lie. What those girls did to each other, was art. I joined after like, 20 minutes of gawking in awe."
"Best experience ever." WOLFBL00D
The Watcher....
"Have had a few threesomes and a foursome with my wife. She's a bit of a queen so she actually enjoys watching me with others then joining in. For me I'm happy to please and it's just fun of course. Mostly came up when we kind of had a talk about fetishes and she said she wanted to try it."
"Like most said though they aren't extremely amazing, usually you can't enjoy certain things you like, or there are some points where people can feel a bit unsatisfied." whyImcalledqueen
It's a Blur....
- "Once was the boy toy for two Balinese women over the course of four days. That was awesome cause it was a travel fling, so it was like a blur."
- "Part of promiscuity dinner club, kinda like a swingers club. Again blur."
- "Several MMF and FFM with my primary partner. It all comes down to expectation setting, boundaries and communication. As a dominantly straight man, MFF are more fun, but there is an excitement to making your partner happy."
"Some are more fun than others, just treat it like anything else. Process before and after. Self-care and post-care are key. Don't treat people like objects. Always treat the third with the same care and compassion as you would your own partner."
"The more communication and lead up, the hotter it is. Lastly, communicate during. Even more so than you do with your primary. Tease and ask everyone what they like, what they have fantasized about. Communicate what you want. Double your fourplay and communication. Your sleeping for two now."
"Oh, water breaks. You're going to need it if you pull this off correctly. A king bed is ideal." pm_me__your__pain
Thank God for the alcohol....
"My ex girlfriend initiated it with a bi-curious friend of hers. i had nothing against it, was just a bit surprised that it came up. we did the deed after some light drinking and everyone got off. then my GF developed a huge problem about it and came overly paranoid, thinking I'd cheat on her with the friend. this was one of many major points when we finally went our own ways." notfun_87
Whoops....
Giphy"Got pregnant, kind of married with both of them right now. My family was a little shocked." Tayoliv
The Ex & a Friend.
"My ex and her friend wanted to be with me, (we were not going out yet), best part was oral. We experimented many positions, and me being a person who loves to be asfixiated, she obliged me while her friend was on top of me. When i was about to finish, my ex again performed on me orally. Awesome." tetrahidrocannabin0l
Eventually Tedious.
Giphy"Ex-girlfriend and I actually first hooked up when she tried to initiate a threesome with me and another friend. Friend passed out immediately so we quietly messed around next to her. Next night, same thing. She and I started dating and eventually got the friend to join us, first couple of times were a lot of fun for everyone involved, then the just progressively got more tedious, stressful, and is probably what resulted in the end of that relationship. Fantasy fulfilled, not something I'm actively chasing anymore." TossedLikeMySalad
I had no pants.
"I was the third wheel. I'm a guy. It was a random occurrence, totally unplanned, I just happened to fit their bill. I can't speak for them but it seemed like she was the one who wanted it, she wanted the attention on her, she wanted 2 men. 10/10 on my end. Except then I was left alone in Canada with a dead phone, an unpaid hotel room and regret."
"My friend's mom (the people I went to canada with) had to pick me up. I had no pants." greatnameallday
I'm Good!
"My wife (girlfriend at the time) set it up with one of her friends. (Not a friend we hang out with often.) While we were at a party. We went back to the friends house and it was fun, mutual foreplay and things like that, then I messed with my wife for a bit, then messed with the friend for a bit. Eventually finishing with my wife."
"It was fun and all, except my wife got super jealous while I was messing with the other girl. So much so, that she really didn't like feeling that way, and while the 3 some was fun, we will probably never do it again."
"I'm fine with that. I can say I've had a 3 some. I don't need it to be a regular thing to have a happy sexual relationship with my wife." Buwaro
Not Good.
"I (f) haven't been in one while I was in a relationship, but the other two people were committed to each other. My friend and her boyfriend approached me about having a threesome and I agreed. It was kinda awkward with him, but with her it was fantastic. The experience wasn't bad altogether, but I don't think it's something I'd do again especially not while in a relationship myself. My friend and her boyfriend ending up splitting up really soon after and I always wondered if the threesome might have had something to do with that." peperomiayam
1-2-3....
Giphy"My wife met a girl in grad school who was into the whole polyamory thing. They became friends and hung out a lot. One night after dropping a multitude of hints (my wife karaoke'd Britney Spears's "3" to her), and getting naked to go in the hot tub (which didn't end up working because the tub's heater stopped working -- in October), I finally just told her straight out that we'd love to have sexy times with her."
"She agreed that it'd be fun, we lit some candles and all got in bed. Everyone had a great time over the next hour or so and we all passed out, completely satisfied"
"We still hang out with her as friends, but she since got into more serious relationships so we've never revisited the sexual relationship." binarybovine
All the Fish....
"here is one person's take on it..."
"I went to a swingers club, Ended up joking with a guy in the smoking area about the "attendees" End of the night he invites me to him& his wife's party in a few weeks time."
"Night finally comes, I arrive at their home, 4 couples and 2 single ladies present and awaiting on another 5 couples. Found out i was the only single guy (20ish) in a house of 40+ swingers."
"After a few hours of socializing and being asked "Why do you swing"/ "Youre so young" etc The female host announced that everyone should go upstairs."
"I walked in after stripping off in another room to see 4 ladies on the bed in various positions with guys or each other, Next room was the same but 2 ladies and a few guys."
"I ended up being dragged into the 1st room by the host and given to his mrs and her friends, Like throwing a fish to pack or piranhas.... lol"
"Best night ever, Still friends, went on holiday with them last year. :)" crellodrello
"Who do I WANT to have sex with?"
"My extremely beautiful long-time friend was asked by her then-boyfriend to fulfill a fantasy of his. She reluctantly agreed, and after looking around on some sites she began to think, "Who do I WANT to have sex with?" She decided I was the only person she really wanted to sleep with apart from her boyfriend. I flew out on an unrelated trip and she prepared to seduce me. I was hit by a car the night before she was going to ask me to mess with her in front of him, so my broken shoulder (I later learned) wound up nixing the plan that I was unaware of."
"I had the chance to meet her boyfriend for a little bit, and he saw how we looked at each other and decided she wanted me a little too much. This all came out about a month later. During that time, having re-set her frame of mind a little, she began to realize that she was in a relationship with a terribly abusive alcoholic and a few months later she broke up with him."
"She came to visit me in my home city on the West Coast for the summer and asked me to marry her. We're going to be getting married next year and I couldn't be happier. Needless to say, the whole idea turned out to be a disaster for her ex and precipitated something wonderful for both of us." Handiclown
Too Much.
"I figured out this type of thing wasn't for me by being a third for a couple. I was the other M in an MMF threesome."
"It was an interesting experience, and I'm glad I tried it. It was really hot at times, but incredibly awkward at others. They were very nice people and we all got along well, but it made me feel weird being watched while having sex. Idk just made me hyper-aware of everything I did and made it hard to get into a rhythm. By the time I left, I was pretty sure group sex just wasn't for me. Too overwhelming and performative in a weird way."
"And not intimate at all. I'm down for casual sex that's just physical, but this situation just felt sterile and impersonal to an extreme. Like I was a tool to be used for their pleasure . Not that that's a bad thing or inconsiderate on their part. It's what I signed up for. Just a reality of the situation which turned me off."
"I think I would be down to try an MFF at some point because 14 year-old me would absolutely murder present-day me if I missed an opportunity to make that happen, but not as part of a couple. I think I'd need all three of us to be on relatively equal footing as unattached singles." Octopus_420
All the ways...
"My girlfriend, now wife, suggested the idea with one of my former female work friends I stayed in contact with and we had drinks with pretty frequently. Of course I agreed to it but it turned out the entire thing was about them hooking up."
"Sometimes they'd remember I was there and pay me a little attention but they'd get distracted by each other and leave me with nothing so I just moved to the arm chair in the corner of the hotel room and read a book."
"I actually fell asleep in the chair and when I woke up they were both passed out on the bed. The chair sleep was horrible so I squeezed into the bed with them feeling grumpy af."
"Later that day my gf gave me a hall pass to shag my friend. So even though the 'threesome' was a bust for me it ended up being a great weekend." ero_senin05
Not usually worth it.
Giphy"Not usually worth it. I've had plenty of situations where me and another female friend got flirty with a guy and went to town, and some where two guys shared me. It's typically a lot of work, and you don't get a lot out of it."
Remember, open communication and honesty go a long way!
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When we're young and naive, we tend to be optimistic as we have our whole lives ahead of us and we have to time to figure out who we are and who we want to be.
But when we're all grown up and out in the big world on our own, nothing can prepare us for the harsh realities of adulting until we experience them.
And unfortunately, life isn't always sunshine and roses the way we imagined it to be when we were much more innocent.
Curious to hear about life's many wake up calls Redditor Just_Surround_2108 asked:
"What is the adult version of finding out that Santa Claus doesn't exist?"
Life's deceptions begin slowly revealing themselves.
Caveat Emptor
"When you buy an 8-piece tupperware set, 4 of the pieces are lids."
– throwmeawaypoopy
"Same with pots and pans. What a rip off!"
– MrsMalvora
"And when you put them in the cabinet, suddenly SIX of the pieces are lids 😂"
– opheliainwaders
Value Of Friendships
"That some friends were never really your friend."
– Kangaroowrangler_02
"Also that friendships can end just like any relationship."
– ScienceUnicorn
"The best friend I'll ever have said some nasty things to me and blocked me recently. Never going to get much closure on that front."
"Not having closure is, with both friends and lovers, worse than the loss itself. I want to grow. Tell me what I need to become so this doesn't happen to me again!"
– VoxClarus
"On a related note: your co-workers are not your friends."
– tomdelfino
"I think most people seem to treat this as the default stance, but I’ve learnt you can actually make deep connections amongst coworkers, the same way you do in other stages of your life."
– immorjoe
The role of parent and child unexpectedly switches. So now what?
Who's Parenting Who
"That time period when your relationship switches and your parent looks to you for answers and advice, instead them being the one with all the answers."
– Smile_Terrible
"Not sure about that one. Dad simultaneously says I’m the smartest person he knows and I don’t know how to do anything lol."
– Puzzleheaded-Job6147
About Grieving
"When both your parents die. I am in my mid 50’s and had my mom pass on Mother’s Day ‘22. My Dad then was living with us from then, and eventually reached in-home hospice status with a sudden stage IV cancer diagnosis. He died in January of this year, and then I got laid off from my tech job and was unemployed for 10 months. Nothing takes the wonderment and positive outlook from the world than having to empty out your childhood home solo and throw everything you grew up with into a big dumpster and are left to wonder what our lives really mean."
– i_spock
Leaving Behind The House You Grew Up In
"I’m in the process of dismantling my childhood home right now. I’ve compared it to dismembering the dead body of a loved one. It’s really rough."
– HaloTightens
"my mum sold my childhood home a decade ago. i won't have to go through that."
– deathschemist
We all want to grow up when we're young. But as soon as reach reach 30, we want to slam on the breaks.
Aimlessness
"I thought I'd grow up, move out, find my footing in the grown up world and basically switch into cruise mode. Now I'm in my 40s and sh*t is confusing as f'k."
– Borsti17
"As adults, nobody knows what they're doing, we're just pretending we do."
– BeautifulMidnight-
Misconception Behind Work Integrity
"Being a hard worker and good at your job doesn't necessarily mean that you'll be rewarded for it."
– DorianOrosco
And the laziest person at work is allowed to be lazy, but the hardest worker isn’t allowed a break."
– Puzzleheaded-Job6147
We Are Our Parents
"Finding out that your parents are people, too, with weaknesses or flaws that you were blind to when you were young."
– tamammothchuk
"And the day you suddenly notice how old they are. When their mortality finally hits you."
– daggerxdarling
Living On Borrowed Time
"Yep had that day earlier this month. Was visiting for dad's 75th birthday."
"As I was leaving, out in the sunshine and fixing to get in the truck, I suddenly saw how small and frail-looking they are now. Mom hit me the hardest. She's started to shrink. They are both healthy, but Dad's just . . . worn."
"Been also doing the math lately. The math where you count up how many times you see them a year and then multiply that by how many years they have left according to the average."
"I've had enough crap and surprise losses in my life that I've long since started parting with family and friends like it might be the last time I get to see them. But that times left to see them calculation really clobbers me with my folks, and it's not even that bad yet for me. Given the ages of my grandparents when they passed I've probably still got somewhere between 150-200 visits."
"But the meter is running."
– Boudyro
I'm at the point where I'm realizing there are no handbooks on life and taking care of our parents.
When you're so used to having them there and taking care of you your whole life, nothing can prepare you for the time when that role reversal happens.
As tough as that may be, however, there's nothing more beautiful in life than returning the favor for the people who loved you unconditionally and raised you.
It's not attractive to gloat.
And there is little more obnoxious than flaunting how wealthy you are.
Particularly if you aren't even that wealthy to begin with.
Indeed, perhaps to make themselves feel more powerful and important than they actually are, many people will try and show off how much money they have in what they wear, eat, live in, and drive.
However, not everyone is so easily fooled, as those in the know can detect a charlatan when they see one.
Redditor aloe_veracity16 was eager to hear the dead giveaways that someone might not be as wealthy as they appear, leading them to ask:
"What’s a dead giveaway that someone is not actually as wealthy as they claim?"
Stating The Obvious...
"When they constantly talk about how wealthy they are."
"A genius doesn't need to tell you they are smart."
"An athlete doesn't need to tell you they are fit."
"And a rich person shouldn't need to tell you they are wealthy."- TigLyon
Attracting Unwanted Attention...
"90% of the wealthy shut the f**k about it, because they learn once they start making good money everyone wants a piece."
"Talking about it constantly = broke AF."- Vladtehwood
Simply By Doing It...
"Making the claim at all is a dead giveaway."- Starfox41
In Plain Sight...
"People who actually ARE wealthy mostly try to hide it."- Matt7738
"Living In A Material World..."
"I'm not well-versed in judging someone's wealth, but I do notice that the fake rich only look rich on social media and try their hardest to go to popular locations celebrities post."
"I know a couple of friends of friends who took out a loan just to keep up the facade that they're all in on the latest iPhones and wearables."
"They built a persona of being a rich kid, so now they have to stay the course."- anima99
Flaunt Modesty, Not Wealth...
"As a person which knows many very rich people."
"I can guarantee that not a single one of them wants to be known as rich."- CompetitivePause9033
Schitts Creek Flirt GIF by CBCGiphyWe Heard You The First Time!!!
"When they repeatedly and adamantly tell you how wealthy they are."- Famous_Bit_5119·
Experiences Over Stuff!
"I feel like actual rich people prioritize vacations/travel, buying their kids cars, paying for their kids/grandkids tuition."
"They don’t spend money on flashy or luxury stuff as much."- Klesea
Summer Time GIF by Merge MansionGiphyAll In The Editing...
"Ever notice how those jet setting influencers that post their pictures out of the airplane window are behind the wing?"
"They're in coach."
"The picture in business is where they stopped to pose on the way through."- Turbulent-Ask-2633
Pack Light...
"Private Jet pilot friend of mine said for the slightly wealthy they bring loads of luggage."
"The ultra rich bring a day bag they have enough money to buy clothes when they get there or already have clothes waiting on them."- hadmeatgotmilk
The Less Said...
"I never met a wealthy person that talks about it."
"They don't need to."- 181Eclipse·
Christina Moses Secrets GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy"See The Pyramid [SCHEMES!] Along The Way..."
"They make a goofy advertisement for some book or course that 'will help you get rich too!'"
"If they were actually rich, they would be on some tropical beach engaging in whatever vices they enjoy most-not hocking some get-rich-quick scheme."- illegalopinion3
All About The Simple Things...
"My dad's entire job is managing millionaire / billionaire philanthropy accounts, so I’ve grown up surrounded by some of the wealthiest people in the country."
"And I never knew until I got older how these 'Mr. Smith' and 'Ms. Jones' people that I’d grown up hanging out with were anything above upper middle class."
"Normal clothes, modest homes, very down to earth and funny people."
"Big wealth, and especially old wealth, is quiet wealth."- Travel_and_Tea·
Anything But Proud...
"I have a family member who insists she and her husband are upper middle class."
"She isn’t."
"She’s rich (8 figures), but it hurts her in some sort of primal way to acknowledge that."
"Her adult brother is also wealthy, although not as much as his sister."
"Likely also 8 figures."
"He insists he’s blue collar and middle class."
"There’s something in their upbringing that makes them ashamed of having 'made it' financially."- strangled_spaghetti
Blue Collar Work GIF by Pudgy PenguinsGiphyPeople will try to come off as wealthier than they are for a multitude of reasons.
But just like any facade, keeping it up eventually becomes untenable.
This is why it's always most important to be grateful for the things you have, rather than flaunt what you wish you had.
Life is full of shock and surprise.
Apparently, that is part of the fun.
Who hasn't been left stunned by life events?
We always think we're immune to way too many things.
Anything and everything is possible.
It's important to be ready.
Redditor Bob_the_peasant wanted to hear about the things that have left people SHOOK, so they asked:
"What 'That can’t happen to me' thing happened to you?'"
I haven't been left that shocked that often.
I'm always expecting the worst, so I'm prepared.
But you never know.
I'm Dead
Snakes Imacelebau GIF by I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! AustraliaGiphy"A snake fell out of a tree and bit me on the head."
"ETA: I have always been more scared of snakes than anyone I know, so it’s just so ironic that this happened to me of all people."
amanitachill
Crash Into Me
"A car crashed through my kitchen last year."
aster636
"I woke up to a truck parking in my bathtub 2 weeks before Christmas a few years ago. I watched my sink roll past my bedroom door followed by a hubcap. The driver managed to cross a median, 3-lane road, up an embankment, through an iron fence and between trees. He'd been involved in an altercation nearby and was fleeing the scene."
anjie59k
Hot Air
Swinging Hot Air Balloon GIF by Red BullGiphy"My family and I were in a hot air balloon crash."
GymDoll2000
"My friend had one crash into her pool when she was a kid."
Environmental-Car481
This is why hot air balloons and skydiving are just a HELL no for me.
Always have. Always will.
Tragic
Cat No GIF by Looney TunesGiphy"My wife cheated on me with my best friend. They’re moving in together next month. I’m in a new city thousands of miles away. I found out a month ago."
Tssodie
Bad Penguin
"Everyone else’s stories are very sad so here’s something a bit lighter. I’ve mentioned this story before but I got bitten on the neck by a penguin."
"I was at an event where the local zoo had a penguin and owl sitting on tables with handlers so you could take a picture next to them. The penguin went for my glass of wine, I moved the wine, and it bit me on the neck hard enough to bruise. They removed the penguin after that. 😂."
archaeologistbarbie
All Gone
"Our house burned in a wildfire, we lost absolutely everything we owned and only salvaged a single coffee 3 cup."
"On the good side: There was a boy I crushed on all through high school. We went to summer camp together and I adored him. We ended up getting together in our 20s after reconnecting, and have now been together more than 20 years, married almost 17. We’re as madly in love as ever."
toomuchisjustenough
Good Luck
"Homelessness. It came swiftly and out of nowhere. had no savings and the landlord sold the house I was in. couldn’t afford a new place so lived in my car with my dog for a few months. ended up finding community assistance and got into an apartment."
jumbospicyslimjim
"I can’t even imagine being in that situation. Hopefully, this is just the start of things turning around for you. Sending you good energy!"
frappbarqueen
Early Michael Myers
"About 10 years ago, I was stabbed in the arm with a flathead screwdriver. It was a coworker whom I had previously gotten along well with. He had stopped taking benzos and smoking weed a few days before and was on a hair trigger. I said something sarcastic, and he just snapped."
Mr_Spaghetti_Hands
Bad Landing
Bad Day Seagull GIF by Sound FXGiphy"I was lying on the beach and a seagull flying very high took a poop and it went straight in my mouth."
Competitive_Show6205
This is why I say... "Never trust a seagull!"
They are minions of the devil.