Moment of honesty - I've often found myself lost in thought trying to figure out why my partner is attracted to me.
I'm a complete dweeb who snort-laughs at the silliest things.
I have a permanent resting b*tch face, but a smile that is much more Spongebob's eager face.
I come with ridiculously-named dogs, have like 17 hobbies that make no sense, am pretty much one big soft-spot/bleeding-heart, watch more cartoons and cooking shows than should be legal, and can't reach anything above the bottom shelf.
Reddit user MainSeparate2964 asked:
"Men of reddit, what's something non-sexual that instantly makes a women really attractive?"
Spoiler alert - almost everything on this list is something that either myself or a friend has tried to minimize about themselves.
We all know someone who has stopped smiling "too big" or laughing "too loud" or asking "too many questions" or being "too smart" or hesitated doing an activity because it was "too masculine."
Dulling your shine because you're afraid people won't like you only gives people less to like.
Laugh
"Genuine laughter."
"Someone who is comfortable being happy is someone people wanna... make 'happy.' "
- walk_through_this
"Yes this exactly. Carefree people who aren’t concerned about their outward appearance and are fine just laughing and being happy are amazing."
- thatonetraveler
"I would add that it doesn't really matter what the laugh sounds like as long as it is genuine."
"I've heard of people being self-conscious about their laughing sound and that's just silly to me, to be honest. A genuine laugh makes you very attractive!"
- stbtb
Hilary Duff Lol GIF by YoungerTV
Giphy
Curiosity
"A curious mind."
"Finding the interesting side of things you have never thought about before, your partner's passions, friends' hobbies, a topic in a movie/book/documentary... whatever."
"You will never run out of things to discover and get excited about with such a person."
- Jimbo_Sandcastle
"My girlfriend is a massive book nerd and just hearing her talk about books and how some books made her feel is honestly the cutest thing ever."
"God I'm a lucky moron."
- cannedrex2406
"My ex was a beautiful and accomplished woman, but had no curiosity about people or things."
"She was very focused on only her goals - which is fantastic and means she will achieve so much. But the complete lack of odd and intriguing conversations or curiosity about others (including myself) and what makes them unique was difficult."
"I’d say this is true generally too. People are so much more interesting and fun to be around when they have a genuine curiosity."
- ColinHalfhand
The Melody
"Her face lighting up when seeing me."
- seeasea
"I kept running into someone who put a smile on my face the way my then-wife simply couldn't. Never thought of straying, just felt this little melody than never really fit with the rest of the music, y'know?"
"My wife and I split over other reasons."
"I ran into that someone again and found the same smile, that same melody."
"That was almost four years ago. I'm currently waiting for that someone to come home now, and we'll be having dinner together in our home. The melody goes on and on."
- walk_through_this
"My boyfriend always says he loves how happy I am to see him, how excited I get to see him, and how I smile when I see him."
"It’s genuine. I am really that happy to see him."
- mollylg311
One Liners
"A woman that can crack a great one liner on the spot is about the most attractive, non-aesthetic attribute in my opinion."
- Burjennio
"That’s a lifer trait cause when the rest falls apart at least whip smart humor is left"
- balldatfwhutdawhut
"Half the reason I fell for my girlfriend is because, when she first met my friends, they were cracking a couple jokes, and some were at her expense (nothing mean though)."
"Before I could say anything, she immediately snapped back. Instant 10/10"
- Walshy231231
The Atmosphere
"Being straightforward."
"I breathe the atmosphere, not read it. Tell me directly what you're thinking or how you feel so I know."
- I_Love_Small_Breasts
"This is so very important. None of us can read minds, yet we do have horrible habits of trying to do so."
"If we all could just stop trying to mindread and stop expecting our own minds to be read, all of society would benefit."
- truthseeker1228
"Yes!"
"I specifically remember this one line from the office where Kelly says 'Darrel is SOOOO complicated. What kind of man just says exactly what he's thinking?!' "
"That's what made me realize that I want to be like that in my relationships. It takes some getting used to, but works great. would recommend lol."
- moist_maplecrumpet
Plot Twist!
"Being well put together, like they got their life some what straight..."
"Otherwise it won't be as devastating when I f*cking ruin it."
- UpsetYet
"You get an upvote for the unexpected twist at the end lol"
- Affectionate_Wall705
"Damn, you my ex?😭"
- _anxious_lemon
"Dude! I think I dated you in college."
- mark_f**kerburg0
Waifu
"Muscle."
"It's a sign of a woman who is neither neglectful of her health nor overly concerned with 'the perfect figure. Just someone who's figured out how to prioritize getting in her best shape while living her best life."
"That's somebody who has it figured out."
"Also buff women are hawt."
- ArchDukeNemesis
Giphy
Hugs
"Giving good hugs."
"As a very physical and touch starved person if someone gives me a good hug I might cry and I’ll definitely think about it all week."
- MrHoneybuns
"Bro a hug from a girl you really like, and she does it from behind as a surprise, is one of the rarest forms of flattery that men get."
"It's actually a huge shame that more women don't do it"
- MainSeparate2964
"This is how my boyfriend won me over in the very first minute of our very first date. :) "
"He gave me a warm, generous, respectful hug and I thought to myself 'damn that was a good hug.' ”
- foxglove0326
Mom Mode
"As a married man, how good my wife is to our kids."
"How much they love her reminds me every day that I chose the right woman. I have known too many men that chose a pulse over the character of the woman they're with and end up getting f*cked up pretty bad at the end of the relationship."
"When I was a single man, I'd say empathy and compassion would have been the top two to get my motor started."
- valboots
"Good mom vibes are absolutely a thing."
- Tsiar1
Enthusiasm Over Everything
"Interest / enthusiasm."
"A thousand times this. Ten BILLION times this."
"Sure my wife is attracted to me, but she also loves movies, is psyched when we take our kids to renaissance faires, and likes weird sh*t that I dig as well."
"Does she have big boobs? Yes. Is she psyched about going to an old castle to explore history? Yes."
"Does she have an @ss that won’t quit? Yes. Will she spend 5 hours at a combination book store slash petting zoo? Yes."
"Did I bang her this morning before going to work? Hell yeah. Am I psyched to watch a movie with her tonight? So very much."
- Jaws_V_The_Return
"Keep living the life my man."
- literalilliteratekat
"Good for you two! Wish you a lifetime of happiness and morning sex and movie nights."
- niiightskyyy
Happy Hailee Steinfeld GIF by Pitch Perfect
Giphy
That's Hot
"Being pretty while dressing modest."
"Like, not feeling the need to show everything off. It's hot."
"I also don't mind girls showing everything off either. That's hot too."
"Turns out girls are just hot."
- o8unu
Plays Well With Angry Old Man
"Being nice."
"I have enough negativity in my life these days."
"A happy, polite, bubbly personality is amazing and it plays well with my 'angry old man' qualities."
- GingerMarquis
She's Got Moves
"A friend of mine met a girl in a bar we were at. This girl was with one of her friends."
"I wasn’t attracted to this friend so I just basically maintained conversation with her so as to give the other two some room."
"The girl was really cool so chatting was easy, but still not interested."
"At some point the girl gets bored talking, gets up, said she wanted to dance. I thought to myself: ‘awesome yeah cool, why not?’ "
"Guys and gals, those girls moves were something to fall in love to."
"I’m not talking about anything sexy or sensual or whatever, at all… just pure skill and, charisma?"
"I can’t put my finger on what it was, but my god, did that make her look like 80x more attractive, if only for a moment."
- DasThrowawayen
Us Army Dancing GIF by US National Archives
Giphy
The Scent Of A Woman
"Scent."
"I spent 3 hours watching Batman today with a girl I’m kinda seeing and I could smell her the whole time and could barely focus on the film for wanting to kiss her."
"We’ve been seeing each other for months and spend more than enough time together but something about how she smelt today made it maddening"
- Melancholy_Prince
Not NPCs
"When they're respectful of the people around them; be nice to the server, the cashier, let the elderly go in the bus in front of you (in the same line of thought, offering your seat...), etc."
"I want to see you care, or at least know you're dealing with actual human beings."
"You're not in the Matrix, everybody around you is unique with feelings, experiences, fears, likes, dislikes... Treat them as such. All the people around are not NPCs."
- Maleficent-Bet-1371
Talent
"Being really talented at something."
"You can shred the guitar or sing? You know how to weld or scuba dive? You can paint really well? You know a martial art? Hell yeah. Skill is sexy."
"Having a sense of humor is also a really great thing. Even if you don't have a good skill, being witty and fun makes you enjoyable to be around and that counts for a whole hell of a lot."
"Just being hot and being barely able to function as an adult isn't great. Being a humorless mall mannequin of a human isn't what someone seeking a partner wants."
"Above all, being open and honest about what you want makes everything so much better. If your partner can't or won't communicate with you or you can't find an effective way to communicate with each other, there's no point in trying for any sort of relationship other than the most skin-deep sorts."
- Psych-adin
bass guitar GIF
Giphy
Wardrobe Wonders
"Unintentional wardrobe malfunctions."
"If I can see a hint of a bra or the peek of panties it’s an instant turn on."
"Can’t be too deliberate though."
- pherring
Elation And Joy
"Reading these posts reminded me of what I enjoy when it came to a girl - like, her being genuinely happy."
"The smiles, laughs, jokes, that look in a girls eye when she is being mischievous and the smirk that comes with it, the innocent look they make when you catch them in an embarrassing situation..."
"... like mentioning needing to buy more cookies, and you turn around to find her shoving cookies in her mouth - and that pause as you two watch one another, before both bursting out in laughter."
"God, I want this feeling of elation and joy again. I haven't felt it since years before my Divorce."
- Captain_Blackbird
As for me ... yeah that whole list of things I was insecure about makes up the bulk of why my partner adores me.
He loves that I'm the "worst evil genius" he knows. He is totally into the cartoons, he sings backup when I bust out a silly song, he jumps in and joins me when I do a happy taco dance.
Oh, and the best part; he snort-laughs and he has a big goofy smile like Spongebobs eager face, too!
AND THIS MAN GOT ME A STEP STOOL SO NOW I CAN REACH LIKE 2, MAYBE 3, SHELVES!
Authenticity, fam.
Get you some.
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The old wives' tales.
They are the stories of legend.
I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.
Where did they originate?
WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!
You don't hear about them as much anymore.
It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.
But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.
Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:
"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"
"Wait an hour to swim after eating."
What a crock!
So many summer hours wasted.
I want revenge for that one.
Say Nothing
Giphy
"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."
LonelyMail5115
"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."
I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Say Something
"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."
Severe_Airport1426
"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."
crappycurtains
"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."
AlbinoShavedGorilla
Body Temps
"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."
chriseo22
"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."
"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."
apocalypticradish
Arms Down
"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."
Fatmouse84
10 Years Actually
Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Giphy
"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."
"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."
Gecko-911
I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.
This tale is haunting.
High/Low
Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace
Giphy
"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."
LeastFormal9366
"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."
IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI
The Cursed
"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."
"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."
SmoreOfBabylon
Stay In
"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."
"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."
worldbound0514
Dreams and Facts
"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."
"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."
mattshonestreddit
"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."
Darthdemented
Cracked
Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office
Giphy
"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."
Choice-Grapefruit-44
"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."
MacyTmcterry
I love my knuckles.
Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
Every now and then, a friend of ours might say something, or we might overhear a complete stranger say something that makes us stop in our tracks.
More often than not, what we can't believe we just heard is something so ridiculous, we can't help but put the person who said it in their place.
Other times, however, what we just heard might have stunned us silent because of how shockingly clever it was.
Resulting in our not wanting to scold or yell at someone, but rather give them a handshake.
Redditor SubmergingOriginal was curious to hear the sharpest and wittiest things they've ever heard, from friends and strangers alike, leading them to ask:
"Enough with the dumbest; what is the wittiest thing you've ever heard someone say?"
Don't Give Me So Much Credit...
'I was on a team at work that was on a project working insane overtime."
"One night after an 80-90 hour week, we were all sitting around the table trying to finish up so we could go home."
"Around 11, my buddy's wife called, dubious about the hours he'd been keeping."
"We heard her through the line - 'are you cheating on me?'"
"Exasperated, he looked at our boss, then replied 'honey, if I was cheating on you, I would have been home by now'."- lionbatcher
Eternal Optimism...
"Asked a blind guy if he'd been blind his whole life."
"He said 'Not yet'."- Feeling_Mode_6465
Free time Isn't The Only Thing He Has On His Hands...
"My brother got a vasectomy and when the doctor was releasing him and giving him instructions (with the nurse listening in), one of the orders was to 'come back and have a follow-up appointment after you’ve ejaculated 30 times'.”
"Without missing a beat my brother asked 'what time do you open tomorrow?'”
"The nurse couldn’t keep it together after hearing that."- UtahUtopia
Awkward Season 8 GIF by The Office
Giphy
Double Whammy!
"My pal uses the phrase 'he doesn’t look strong enough to carry information' and it cracks me up every time."
"Calling someone stupid and weak in one fell swoop."- JennyW93
Can't Hide Your DNA...
'Whenever I jokingly insult my mum, she says 'that must be where you get it from'."
"She cracked the code."
"I can never offend her without offending myself."- JennyW93
Self-Sufficient!
"My brother was a line cook at a New Orleans restaurant."
"My mom was in town, staying at a fancy hotel, and he stopped by after work, still wearing his kitchen whites."
"He was reading a newspaper in the lobby waiting for her to come down when the shocked lobby manager sputtered at him, 'MAY I HELP YOU!?!?'
"He answered, 'thanks, but I know how to read',” and went back to his paper."- jobrody
Morph Current Affairs GIF by Aardman Animations
Giphy
A Miracle!
"My brother-in-law’s comment."
"The entire family went out for my mother’s 80th birthday and after the meal we all went to a local park, largely occupied by the elderly, to rest."
"My mother needed crutches at this point, and they were resting against her bench."
"My 10-year-old niece, who looked like every starving waif image from Dickens, grabbed the crutches and started hobbling round the park."
"All the OAPs were following her progress with looks of pity until my brother ran up behind her, and kicked away the crutches."
"There was an audible gasp from round the park and then my niece picked the crutches back up and started chasing my brother, clearly intending to hit him."
"In the confused silence my brother-in-law’s voice rang out 'Praise be! She can walk again!'"
"We still think this was the highlight of the birthday celebrations."- DdraigGwyn
Still Legal, Whichever Way You Cut It...
"I picked up my pleasantly tipsy boyfriend from a nightclub."
"We were stopped by the Police for a random breath test."
"They asked me my age, and I said, 33."
"My bf blurted out '33? You told me you were 22'."
"Police just laughed and let me go."- Aggravating-Corgi379
Music Video Police GIF by Andrew W. K.
Giphy
A Bit Too On The Nose?
"Business law class in college years ago, talking about the issues that black Americans had before the Civil Rights."
"Amendment, trying to travel through the south with the discrimination so rampant, trying to find restaurants to serve them and decent lodgings."
"My instructor was posing a hypothetical: 'So you pull up out front of this place, you're exhausted from driving for hours, and you see the sign out front says 'Ku Klux Klan Motel'."
"'What would you expect to find there?'"
"Without missing a beat, from the back of the room came this gem: "'Extra sheets in every room?'"- NedsAtomicDB
Not Yet, Anyway...
"I was working with my friend and his dad."
"My friend (26) heard an ice cream truck near where we were working."
"He asked his dad if he could have a couple dollars."
"His dad asked, 'what for?'"
"My friend told his dad that there was an ice cream truck in the neighborhood, and that they were playing music."
"My friends dad told him "'They don't charge anything to listen to the music'."- tatersalad1234567890
Words Escape You In The Literal "Heat" Of The Moment...
"A friend of mine is a teacher and her husband is known for his wit."
"She told this story to him:"
"One day at school a kid took the hall pass and returned reeking like smoke."
"She asked the kid if he’d been smoking and he denied it over and over."
"She was about to send him to the office when she noticed smoke coming from somewhere."
"She told the kid and he realized that he didn’t put his cig out completely and it was burning in his pants pocket."
"The kid noticed and frantically tried to put it out and someone finally poured water on it."
"Her husband sat listening to this with a weird look on his face."
"She asked him what was wrong."
“'What’s wrong???'"
"'This was probably the only chance you’ll have in your life to say literally, ‘liar,liar, pants on fire’ and you missed your chance'."- Luder714
On Fire No GIF by PEEKASSO
Giphy
Amazing What You Might Say A Few Drinks In...
"When I went to a renaissance faire once, I went to a beer tent and ordered a Newcastle Brown Ale (seemed the most fitting for the surroundings)."
"The beer wench, without skipping a beat, said, 'Everyone wants a Newcastle - no one wants to remodel!'"- jayhof52
Read The Room People!
"My dad wiped out when skiing down a mountain and lost a ski."
"After a few minutes of hunting for it, he gives up, slings the one remaining ski over a shoulder and starts walking down the mountain in his ski boots."
"About half-way down, another skier stops and goes 'Gee! Did you lose a ski?'"
"My dad instantly replied 'No, I was out for a walk and found one!'"- PeterJoAl
There's a reason your mother always told you to "use your words".
As clever remarks can have a much more lasting effect on people than a push or shove.