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Former Friends Reveal The Things That Destroyed Their Strongest Relationships

Former Friends Reveal The Things That Destroyed Their Strongest Relationships

Former Friends Reveal The Things That Destroyed Their Strongest Relationships

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Friendship is supposed to be one of the closest relationship bonds a person can have. That doesn't mean it's always sunshine and roses. When friendships go wrong, holy CRAP do they go wrong. It's only with that kind of injury that a person can build up the kind of rage it takes to truly hold a grudge. Long story short, ending friendships can get ugly and we're about to talk about it. One Reddit user posed the question:

Whats some sh*t a friend pulled that you can never forgive them for and you are still salty about it to this day?

Things are about to get high-drama and NSFW, so grab your popcorn and your favorite sassy reaction memes; we're about to do this:

Didn't Make The Cut

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My friend and I both tried out for the badminton team in grade 7. After the first tryouts they call back for a second set. The list was posted on the bulletin board, so after class she went and checked (I asked her to tell me if I made it). She came back saying neither of us did, and I thought that was the end of it.

The second tryouts were happening the next morning before class. During homeroom that day a girl in my class asked me why I wasn't at tryouts. I told her that I didn't make it, at least that's what Friend told me. She informed me that I did, so I went and checked at morning break. My name was on the list. I went and talked to the gym teacher in charge and he let me do a quick tryout at lunch. I didn't end up making the team (which I was okay with, I'd already accepted that fact). This was now 10 years ago and I'm so salty. I've dealt with a lot of s*** from this girl, but we're still friends.

They Fled The Country???

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This was 7 years ago and I'm still mad about it. I'm 30 now and we were friends from the age of 4 to 23 so almost 20 years, and we had borrowed money from each other all the time and always paid it back, so one day he asked to borrow a few grand for a car and I was like sure no problem, he'll pay me back next month like he always does (I borrowed the same amount from him before FYI). I transferred the money and then didn't hear from him for a few days so went round his parents and turns out he used the money to move abroad and set up a new life with a random woman he met online. I almost wish I could say it didn't work out but they got married and had 3 kids and now live in a nice big house, but I gave him all the money I had at the time and it ruined me for quite a long time and I got into debt and other issues which just spiralled from that point. I know which city he lives in but not much more than that, and haven't had what I would consider a best friend again since.

The 20-year Dinner Ban

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Mom planned a small dinner party with another family. She cooked all day, set the table, probably made my dad put a playlist together, and waited for them to arrive. The call and say "oh, we can't make it, something better came up".

They are still friends, but my mother hasn't invited them over for dinner in 20 years. And my mom is an amazing cook.

To this day they still say "oh, we never come over for dinner any more!" And my mom will respond, "yes, that's right, you don't." I like to think I inherited her grudge-holding ability.

Catfish

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I was really lonely in high school and bullied a lot. When I was about 14 or 15, my only "best friend" at the time teamed up with two girls who didn't like me to essentially Catfish me. I don't know why, we weren't fighting or anything. Anyway, they pretended to be a guy romantically interested in me and e-mailed me out of the blue. They talked to me for months as this guy, before I trusted "him" enough to give him answers to really personal questions.

I found out who "he" really was after they told everyone every scrap of personal information I'd told my online friend. And it was some pretty personal s***. I was already depressed, and this experience ended up making me start self harming - a habit I only finally kicked about a year ago.

F*ck you, Melissa. It's been 15 years and I still think it was a shitty thing to do to me.

Justifiable Anger

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Rented my property and kept the money without telling me while simultaneously f-ing my girlfriend. Yeah, I'm still angry.

The Wedding Brush-Off

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A friend texted me the night before my wedding to say that she couldn't attend because she couldn't afford to go. (Wedding was a 30 minute car journey from home) The day after the wedding she had posted photographs on Facebook being out drinking the night of my wedding. Haven't spoken to her since.

Choosing The Girl Over A Lifelong Friend

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Not really salty about it anymore, it's been to long. My best friend growing up stopped being friends because of a girl he just meet. We became friends when we were 4. He was 3 months older them me, so growing up we went to school. Our parents were friends. We went to the same church. So we spent most of our time hanging out.

When we were 17 he met this girl and after the first time she met me she told him she didn't want him hanging out with me, right in front of me. Without hesitation he told me to leave and never talked to me again. It's been nearly 20 years now. I see him about once every couple of years. He's married to her now. He's not allowed to have friends outside of her family and is completely miserable. His parents can't stand her because of how unbelievably rude she is to them and rarely lets them see their grand-kids. It's been so long now that I could care less and barely know them, but it's not something I would forgive.

I Do... Not Blame You.

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My best-man is now engaged to my ex-wife. Dead Sea salty about that still.

Taking A Homeless Person's Money

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When I was in my late teens, I was essentially homeless. One of my absolute best friends was moving away for college and offered to let me stay in his apartment for the remainder of the lease if I would cover half the rent. I was working at a sandwich place at the time, not making more than $7.50 per hour, so it sounded like a great deal.

I paid him for the first month, and was evicted less than month later by the apartment managers. Turns out my bestie hadn't been paying rent, took my money and left me without a place to live.

One of my co-workers let me stay with him until I could get back on my feet.

A few years ago, my former friend saw me at a bar during the holidays and tried to talk to me. Without a word, I just gave him the most blank, vacant, uncaring stare I've ever given anyone in my life. He eventually left me alone.

No Love For Brother

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I was visiting my parents with my dog a few months ago, my brother came into the house and as a normal happy dog would he ran to the door in excitement and is standing about 2 feet away just wagging his tail awaiting the new visitor.

My brother decided he didn't like my dog being at the door and kicked my pup as hard as he could in the stomach. My dog is 180 pounds and I've barely heard him whimper in pain at any point. My dog let out the loudest Yelp and ran to me with his tail tucked whimpering. That's how hard my brother had kicked him.

I'm not a generally angry person and I hardly ever yell and I especially am NOT a fighter. That day my family saw a side of me that they never have. My dad had to physically pull me off of my brother and kicked him out. I believe I said some pretty graphic things about how I was going to kill him. Don't fuck with my dog. Ever.

Nintendo

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My best friend selling my Nintendo for heroin. Not great.

The Drummer

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I had a bandmate (the drummer... always the f*cking drummer) who was always kind of shiftless and self-absorbed but funny and talented, which goes a long way in a band situation. Jim was never on time, serially unapologetic about being an hour late, and was a prima donna about his performances. After a few years of this, I got sick of it and we disbanded.

Fast forward another year, Jim calls me up and tells me he's moving to my city and was wondering if I could give him a job at my construction company. Against my better judgement, I give him a qualified yes. Turns out he was as shitty an employee as he was a bandmate: always late, always texting, futzing around so it took twice as long to do something as it should. Eventually, after numerous attempts to whip him into shape, I let him go.

In the interim, a lot of personal things had happened, including me getting separated/divorced. One day, my ex texts me some screen shots of the conversation Jim initiated. "Hey, girl, just checking on you to make sure you're okay. Breakups are hard. Call me if you need anything..." To her credit, her response was along the lines of, "If I did, I'd probably call somebody else. When was the last time you talked to twelvesteprevenge, anyway?"

He plays drums in a band with other friends of mine but I refuse to go to any of their shows because f*ck you, Jim.

She Could Have Afforded To Repay

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A friend was leaving a crappy relationship, she had a one year old son and was pretty down on her luck. She asked to borrow $2000 for a damage deposit and first months rent and promised to pay me back after her next payday. I was naive and trusted her. In hindsight, I should have known, due to her situation that she wouldn't be able to pay me back that quickly. Anyway, gave her the money and haven't seen a dime of it. What makes it unforgivable for me is that in the 3 years that have passed, she is doing well, bought a brand new car, moved to a nice condo, always has her hair and nails done etc. I feel like if she can afford these things, she could have paid me $50 each pay period or whatever she could, when she could, but obviously paying me back/our friendship is not a priority for her... in fact, whenever I have contacted her about it she just ignores me. Lesson definitely learned, I don't lend anyone money and will teach my children the same. I know not everyone is like my "friend" but it often seems that people who are generous/good natured get taken advantage of.

Attempted Kidnapping

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My 14 yo daughter went through a phase where she became very neglectful in her school attendance and studies so as punishment she was not allowed any tv or music until her homework was done every night -- apparently this was too much for her and she ended up running away -- leaving a note that said "Don't come looking for me because you won't find me. I love you but I just need to get away and find myself. Bye."

I immediately called all her friends in her little phone book -- no one had heard or seen her (this was at 9:00 pm) and as my husband drove around to all her favorite spots to check and see if she was there, I called the police.

They arrived took all the info down, a current picture of her etc. and said they'd issue a BOLO (Be On the Look Out) and bring her home if they spotted her.

I then sat waiting for my husband to return and decided to call my bff, crying hysterically about what had happened.

She listened patiently and gave all the proper sympathetic responses including that if my daughter didn't return by that night (she lived two hours away in another city) she would come in the morning and stay with me to show support and brain storm.

I agreed and we cried together some more and then we ended the conversation.

We didn't sleep all night and jumped out of my skin every time the phone rang. Morning arrived and so did my bff.

She would leave for home at dark and return in tbe morning every day for the almost three weeks our daughter was missing. All along being a rock to me as support. Brain storming, making more calls to other family and friends for me, put her kids on the look out and to spread the word etc..made meals so I didn't have to cook and gave me hugs and her shoulder to cry on, often times crying with me.

Almost three weeks into my daughter being missing the phone rang and it was the police -- talk about a heart attack, especially since they had found the body of a female at a isolated park -- and all they simply said "Mrs. Worry We found her!"

I cried and said "Is she ok?" and I sware I stopped breathing until he answered.

He says "Yes, she's fine. Has a mouth on her and we feel sorry for you, but she's fine. Another PD found her in another county, recognized her from her picture and brought her in. She's here, if you want to come pick her up. We wouldn't blame you if you decided to leave her here, but she is here."

I laughed between tears and said I'd be right down -- coincidently my bff had decided to stay home that day and so I called my husband from work to come home so we could go get our daughter together.

Here's the "shorter" part of this story.

Fast forward after many months of counseling and an actual in patient hospitalization for our daughter she snapped out of it and once again there was peace and joy in our home.

So imagine my surprise when one night as my daughter and I were having our nightly mother/daughter chats while staring at the stars on our deck -- my daughter blurts out , " Mom aren't you curious about the where, who or what of my little excursion?"

I hadn't pushed her for details because I didn't want to stress her and figured I'd hear it from her sooner or later. So I just said "Yes, but only when you're ready. Don't you want to know what and how I felt finding you gone?"

She said yes and so I vented my fears, worries and sleepless nights and made the ending comment of "...had it not been forBFF being a great friend to me I'd have lost it."

My daughter by now was softly weeping at my anguish and said "Mom...she's NOT your friend."

And I said "Why do you say that?"

And my daughter said "Because....I was hiding out at her house all that time. She hid me from you and kept encouraging me not to go home that she had always wanted a daughter like me and I could stay and be her daughter. She evil and mean, she's also jealous of you and likes daddy and told me that she wish she had your looks and money and life. She's NOT your friend. But please don't tell her I told you. She made me promise not to say anything."

I could have fell out of my chair in shock.

The next morning after my daughter went to school, I got in my car and drove the two hours to my bff house. She was shocked to see me (she had been inexplicably absent since our daughter was "returned") and I could see the worry and slight fear in her face but tried to act like nothing was wrong.

She didn't originally invite me in like usual and had a death grip on her door knob so I knew SHE KNEW why I was there.

I said WHAT? You're not going to invite me in now? And she quickly caught herself and said "OH, sorry come on in".

No sooner had we sat down and I let her have it with a tongue lashing she's never had before and I ended it with "You're evil and no friend of mine and I never want to see you EVER again!!! And you better pray to God that I can't prosecute you for kidnapping!!" then I stormed out.

We'd been friends since grade school!

How she could have done that to us is beyond me, and I could have easily beat the crap out of her but chose the high road.

Something that I still regret talking and NOT beating the crap out of her.

I want her to feel the pain she caused me by knowing all along my daughter was at her house while she cried with me and held my hand and SAW THE PAIN I WAS SUFFERING.

A pure sociopath. Ughh.

Stolen Art

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He was an artist and I was a writer. I had a script written out for a graphic novel, he wanted to work on it and I agreed.

He did no work whatsoever for two months. Not a single sketch. Instead, he put his name on my story and took a meeting with a publisher through a contact he had. He told me about it after they let him know they weren't interested and acted like it was no big deal.

Needless to say, I lost my shit. I made him show me all the stuff he showed them. His name, everywhere. His contact info, everywhere. My name was on one page, under his. Everything he showed them was 100% my work, even what sketches there were were from me, and he acted like he did it all.

I told him to f*ck right off, forever.

Don't Bring Missionaries

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I had some friends from church that I thought understood and supported me. I am athiest, and don't even want to discuss religion. They called to see when was a good time to visit me, and I was excited to hear from them. They brought pushy missionaries. I'm still mad about it, and don't reach out to them because of it. At the time I kept the peace, now I regret not saying something because it was just rude.

Cat Food For The Abused

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My mother used to starve me. Like literal abuse. If I was lucky I'd get a quarter of a butter sandwich for lunch and for tea, a dried lump of old cooked pasta that had been defrosted by being left in the counter all day. I used to be so so hungry!

A friends mother took pity on me, I don't know how it came about, but she began sending my friend in with an extra lunch every day in school. It was only a sandwich and a juice but wow, I had food that was nice and filling! I was so thankful and I made it clear that I was.

Then one day, the friend decided it would be funny to put cat food in the sandwiches and give them to me. When I realized what she'd done, she laughed so publicly at me for being such a scrounger.

Obviously it was an amazing thing that that friends parents did for me, I was definitely a scrounger by all means but I was so hungry! I still don't trust others with my food though

That Playlist, Though...

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I had two friends in middle school and we would always hang out. We had a whole friend group and for the first time in my life I felt like I had friends and like I belonged somewhere.

About halfway through ninth grade, my two friends just stopped talking to me and inviting me to stuff. They were shutting me out. So I automatically started thinking it was a problem with me. I racked my brain trying to figure it out. Cried and cried cause I was losing my only friends.

Years later, I talked to one of them about it and asked why they shut me out. He said, "do you really want to know?" Obviously I did. He said it was because of the music I listened to. I listened to Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, AC/DC, all that good stuff. They listened to All American Rejects and We The Kings, etc. I told him that was the dumbest fucking reason and walked away.

I went through agony trying to figure out what I did wrong and it was just what I had on my iPod.

Medical Snooping

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I caught a former friend rifling through correspondence between me and an online Dr.

I went MENTAL.

I was a closeted trans-woman at the time. Im still mostly closeted to this day (but slowly breaking out) - but what gives the prick the right to read letters Iv kept aside in my own home?

The excuse of You've looked depressed for ages and I just wanted to see if there's anything I can do just doesn't cut it. How dare anyone read my mail in the 1st place. Even worse - when it's clearly medically related - to keep going.

Screw him. We don't speak anymore.

H/T: Reddit

Old Wives' Tales People Still Believe For Some Reason

"Reddit user the_spring_goddess asked: 'What is an old wives tale that people still believe?'"

Close up of an owl tilting their head to side, looking bewildered
Photo by Josh Mills

The old wives' tales.

They are the stories of legend.

I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.

Where did they originate?

WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!

You don't hear about them as much anymore.

It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.

But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.

Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:

"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"

"Wait an hour to swim after eating."

What a crock!

So many summer hours wasted.

I want revenge for that one.

Say Nothing

Giphy

"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."

LonelyMail5115

"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."

I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA

Say Something

"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."

Severe_Airport1426

"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."

crappycurtains

"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."

AlbinoShavedGorilla

Body Temps

"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."

chriseo22

"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."

"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."

apocalypticradish

Arms Down

"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."

Fatmouse84

10 Years Actually

Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine Giphy

"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."

REDDIT

"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."

Gecko-911

I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.

This tale is haunting.

High/Low

Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace Giphy

"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."

LeastFormal9366

"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."

IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI

The Cursed

"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."

"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."

SmoreOfBabylon

Stay In

"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."

"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."

worldbound0514

Dreams and Facts

"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."

"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."

mattshonestreddit

"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."

Darthdemented

Cracked

Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office Giphy

"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."

Choice-Grapefruit-44

"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."

MacyTmcterry

I love my knuckles.

Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.

lottery tickets
Erik Mclean on Unsplash

A lot of workers daydream about some day winning the lottery and being able to say goodbye to their job.

Far too many workers are unhappy with their job duties, workplace dynamics or company culture.

But with a taste for luxuries like housing and food, they keep plugging away, year after year.

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Therapist talking during session
Photo by Mark Williams on Unsplash

Some people stand firmly stand behind their beliefs that everyone would benefit from therapy and that therapy is life-changing.

It's because of the totally life-changing truth bombs their therapist had dropped during their sessions.

Curious, Redditor anonymiss0018 asked:

"What is a little bombshell your therapist dropped in one of your sessions that completely changed your outlook?"

Communication Issues

"'If you don’t have these problems with any other person in your life, why do you think you’re the problematic person in this one?'"

- maggiebear

"I love this. I have a 'friend' who I always seem to run into misunderstandings with. Every time we had a conversation, it somehow turned into a debate even if it was me talking about my day. The conversations were never easy."

"I always evaluate myself first and take into consideration his critiques. He was very good at convincing me that I was contradicting myself or wasn't good at communicating my thoughts."

"I NEVER had this issue with ANYONE else in my life. I kept trying to figure out where the miscommunication was coming from. In the end, I just minimized contact and now I don't run into this issue."

- chobani_yo

"I read this quote somewhere once (and probably have it a bit wrong): 'It's a waste of time arguing with someone who is determined to misunderstand you.'"

- Reddit

Emotional Regulation

"'You can’t control your emotions, but you can control what you do with them.'"

"At the time, I was a young adult who had learned zero healthy emotional regulation skills (only suppression and shaming) growing up, so this blew my mind."

- lil_mermaid

Tough Relationships

"'It sounds to me like you are trying to convince yourself to stay with your girlfriend. I'm not so sure it should be so difficult.'"

"At the time he said this, I remember it was like he said, 'The earth is flat.' I thought he was crazy when he suggested relationships don't need to be difficult. But eventually, I started to realize I was trying to change myself to stay with this person rather than just being who I am."

"It took me three more months to finally break up with her but from that day on, I vowed to never again abandon myself just to be with someone I had convinced myself was better than me."

- metric88

High-Stress Situation

"I was at a high-stress time, and I asked her how people live like this."

"She replied, 'Oftentimes they have cardiac events.' She said it as an urging to care for myself as much as possible."

- KittenGr8r

The End of Alcohol

"I was struggling with my alcoholism, and we were discussing how I had been cutting back."

"She asked what I would consider success, with regard to my drinking."

"I said I wanted to get to a point where it wasn't interfering with my daily life. I wanted to just be able to have a glass of wine at holiday dinners or family gatherings."

"She simply asked me why. Why was it important for me to drink at those times?"

"It was as if she'd turned on a light. Alcohol had always been a key ingredient in every family function, for my entire life. When I smell bourbon, I think of my uncle. When I smell vermouth, I think of my dad. Alcohol ran through almost every happy childhood memory."

"But, even more than that, I was very afraid of the explanation I'd have to give when family and friends asked why I wasn't having a drink. I had tried to quit before but failed. What if I admitted my problem, only to fall off the wagon?"

"When she asked why I didn't want to completely quit, it was the first time I saw that last part of the big picture. I'd be willing to drink myself to death in order to avoid being scrutinized, or judged for possible future failures."

"That was the day I quit. I've been sober since May 6th, 2017. 2,407 days."

- sophies_wish

Acceptance vs. Enjoyment

"'Accepting something doesn’t mean you have to like it.'"

"That took away a lot of my inner conflicts about situations because I could accept a situation without expending energy internally fighting against the injustice of it."

- alibelloc

Emotionally Immature Parents

"You are not responsible for your parents' emotional wellbeing. They are independent adults who have been on this earth for many more years than you."

- SmokedPears

Not So Lazy

"'Why do you think you're lazy?' Then she listed off all the things she knows I'm doing for my family, my job, and my life."

"It kind of blew my mind when I struggled to come up with an example."

"She also described family dysfunction as water. Some families are messed up in a way that everyone can see the huge waves across the surface. Others are better at hiding it, but there's still a riptide that you can't see unless you're also in the water."

"It made me realize that trying to keep the surface from ever rippling doesn't erase what is happening underneath."

- flybyknight665

The Harm in People-Pleasing

"'Why do you make people more comfortable when you are uncomfortable?' when talking about people pleasing and fawning."

- ERsandwich

Agree to Disagree

"'Stop trying to get everyone to agree. When you need everyone to agree, the least agreeable person has all the power.'"

This really changed my outlook on planning family events."

- freef

Grieve and Start Anew

"For context, I had a major TBI (traumatic brain injury), seizures, strokes, and all around not a fun brain time when I was 28."

"They said, 'You have to grieve the loss of yourself.'"

"Most people wanted me to go back to how I was. The f**ked up truth is that part of my brain is dead. The person everyone (including myself) knew died. I needed to grieve the loss of myself."

- squeaktoy_la

Multifaceted Identity

"They told me that my job and career is just a way to make money; it's not my life or identity. That took a lot of pressure off me."

- unfairpegasus

Breaking the Cycle

"They validated me."

"'You always talk about not wanting to do to your daughters what your mom did to you. You worry about it so much in every interaction you have ever had with them."

"But your children are 19 and 21 now. They are happy and healthy and they trust you because you’ve never abused them in any way. So I just want to validate for you that you really have broken that cycle of violence."

"You did that. And you should be proud of it. I’m proud of you for it.'"

- puppsmcgee74

The Grieving Process

"I was constantly bringing up how I felt like a completely different person after my mom died... like there was a marked difference between before and after her death."

"But once, she was asking about my hobbies, I got really into describing all the things I loved to do or at least used to do before I got into a deep depression."

"She was like, 'Wow, you seem very passionate.'"

"And I just sat there like, 'Well, I mean, I can't change what I like to do, they're still fun to do.'"

"And it's like she knew when to take a step back, because it was like, wow, I may be super depressed about my mom passing, but I'm still me. I'm still my passions and those don't go away."

"I don't know, maybe it only makes sense to be, but it really started getting me back on track."

- Hannibal680

Sharing the Load

"I've never really had friends. I've had colleagues and classmates and housemates and people who have hung out with me, but I never really felt close to any of them."

"And I did that thing you see on here sometimes; I stopped reaching out to see if I would be reached out to, and I wasn't, which I took as confirmation that they didn't really want me around, or at the very least, that they wouldn't mind my absence."

"I was talking to my therapist about people I'd been close to in college, and she told me to pick one and talk about him. So I did. After I shared some basic stuff like his name and his major etc., and a couple of anecdotes, she asked me what else I knew about him."

"And I couldn't answer. It wasn't really a broadly applicable bombshell, but she said, 'What else?' and I started crying because I realized that for as simple as the question was, my inability to answer spoke volumes."

"I've never had good friends because I've never been a good friend. I'm withdrawn and reserved and I always made others do the work to drag me out, without ever extending my own friendship in a meaningful way in return. If I wanted to have meaningful relationships with other people, I would have to build them."

"I'm still working on this, but I'm trying to make more offers and extend more friendliness to others in my daily life."

- Backupusername

The discoveries in this thread were incredibly touching and profound; it's no wonder these were lasting concepts for these Redditors.

It's important to keep ourselves open to inspiration and insights from others, as we have no idea how their experiences could help us, or how we could help them.

Aerial view of a church in a small town
Sander Weeteling/Unsplash

There's something comforting about living in a small town.

It's characterized by close communities where neighbors know each other by name and there is an abundance of kindness extended to others.

Gift-giving is a commonality, as is the sharing of recipes, and people going out of their way to help each other in a time of need.

The pace of living in small towns is also a striking contradiction to city life, where crowds of people go about their busy lives without much interaction.

Curious to hear more examples of what small town living is like, Redditor official_biz asked:

"What's the most 'small town' thing you've witnessed?"

These are positive examples of a tight-knit community.

Live Updates

"We have a village Facebook page. Every time the ice cream man drives into the village, the entire page goes ballistic. People send live updates of where the van is and which direction he's heading. The ice cream man has started accepting DMs so he knows which streets to go down."

– PyrrhuraMolinae

Brush With The Law

"I’m from a town of less than 2,000 people. When I worked at the grocery store there people would often drop off stuff for my family members because they didn’t want to drive all the way down to our house. I no longer live there but recently got a call from my daughter. She had been stopped for speeding and handed over her license and insurance which happens to be in my mother’s name. The officer goes 'Hey, you’re Donnie’s granddaughter! I ain’t gonna write you a ticket but I’m telling Donnie when I see him tomorrow cause we’re going fishing.' She replied 'I think I’d rather have the ticket.'”

- Reddit

Roadside Catchup

"The traffic on the 'main street' of my town is so sparse, two drivers going opposite directions can stop and talk to each other for a few minutes without causing any problem."

– anon

When things go wrong, people take notice without incident.

Bank Robbery

"A guy robbed a bank and everyone knew immediately who he was and the teller got mad at him."

– AlexRyang

"A local bank was robbed and one of the tellers told the police to bring her a yearbook from about ten years earlier and she would be able to point the robber out. He had been in the grade before hers in school."

– Strict_Condition_632

Wise Woman

"When I worked at the bank in town there was an older lady that had worked there through 5 mergers."

"She knew everyone, there was a young guy yelling at me one day. She walked out of the back and he immediately quieted. She went off about telling his grandmother that he was treating young women like sh*t. She also said that if he didn’t straighten up not one girl in town would ever marry him she would make sure of it."

– ilurvekittens

Intoxicated Local

"Town drunk was paralyzed and used a motorized wheelchair to get around. I was driving home one Saturday night and said town drunk was passed out in his wheelchair doing circles almost directly in the town square. Had to call his brother who came and picked him up on a rollback truck. Strapped him down and drove off into the cold dark night."

– DoodooExplosion

Grazing Over To The Bar

"In my former small town, there was an older guy who'd lost his license after getting a few DUIs. Every day, he would ride his John Deere lawnmower to the corner bar around 3PM and sit around watching TV and sipping his beer well into the night. Then he'd head the couple miles back home on his mower. He even had a little canvass shell he put on when it rained or got too cold."

– brown_pleated_slacks

It's not surprising how small town people behave differently than those who are from metropolitan areas.

Welcoming Committee

"I lived in a small town. When I moved there, people would ask, 'Whose house did you buy?'"

–MoonieNine

"Move to a small town. 30 years later, you are still the new guy."

– impiousdrifter

"I lived in a small town for most of my childhood but I wasn't "from there" because my grandparents weren't from there."

– raisinghellwithtrees

"Worked with an older guy, relative of the owner of the business, he was 73. I asked him if he was a local, he said 'no his parents moved here when he was two.'"

– realneil

A Busy Day

"Lived in a town of about 5,000: A woman walked into the DMV on a Friday, saw that there were 3 people ahead of her and left to come back another time when they weren't so busy."

– KenmoreToast

Who Let The Dogs Out?

"My dogs got out while i was working. the police called my niece's elementary school (she was a 5th grader) to get her to round them up and take them back home."

– mediocrelpn

"There was a small kennel behind the police station for runaways. They called us saying they had our dog, and moments later our dog showed up home. He broke out of jail."

– Worried_Place_917

While life in a small town sounds appealing, I don't know if I can ever live in one.

I'm so used to life in big cities, I think it would be quite unnerving to adjust in a neighborhood where everyone literally knows your business.

I would be paranoid.

And I'm sure the same could be said of life in the big city.

Would you consider making the switch to life in a different setting?