We should all be taught at a very young age when to spot and know when to eradicate toxic people and behaviors.
Seriously... who needs yet another useless semester of PE? This is a life lesson just as viable as Home Ec. Heck, it should be part of the Home Ec curriculum. Oh wait, do they still have Home Ec?
We've been gaslit to take abuse, it's engrained in our DNA and psyche. Somethings are not normal and it's imperative to know when to say no.
Redditor u/Tizerkane wanted to discuss the things and behaviors we've fooled ourselves into believing are proper in life by asking:
What's something inherently toxic that is perceived as normal?
Abuse from in all forms is a big no. And toxicity is oozing from every aspect of life. We have to start cleaning it out of our minds. I've started with taking inventory in friendships. It's about quality, not quantity.
Hard Labor
Stressed Paper GIF by Two Mortgage Guys
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"Overworking."
"To add to this, the expectation that a hobby isn't worth having if you can't (or don't want to) monetize it."
Such an Intellect
"Asking a prospective employee to create a full on project or develop content specific to the position applied for. You might not get the job but the company has your intellectual property (and plenty are not above using it as their own)."
"Edit: Who knew? I just threw this out there because it happened to me. And I couldn't believe the balls out nerve of people asking me to create site-specific content to test my skills, which were well-documented by portfolio and easily verified. I guess I'm not the only one."
Rest is Necessary
"Going to work/school even if you're super sick or in pain, not having days off, being expected to have perfect attendance in school or at work... etc etc."
"My employer has a high turnover of staff. I'm considered an 'old timer' because I've been there two years and I'm actually employed by the company. They combat the high turnover with temp to perm agency staff. Impress the boss and you get employed."
"But the bar is set so ridiculously high for these guys they get dismissed and replaced on a weekly basis. One of the big reasons is guys calling in sick being dismissed because 'they're clearly time wasters. Humans get ill. We don't get sick pay where we work. If they're calling in sick they haven't made that decision lightly."
Torture
"I'm surprised nobody else has said sleep deprivation yet. Sleep deprivation literally causes brain damage to the part of the brain responsible for happiness and memory. There is a reason military regulation require soldiers be provided 8 hours of sleep. Because sleep deprivation is a form of torture."
Shut Up!
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"Parents screaming at children during little league games."
Oof, so much awful can be traced back to our professional lives. A job, even a career is just that. A job or a career. You're not a slave to it. It's doesn't to own you. Why have we been taught to bow down to a boss? When we should be punching the boss.
Best Excuses For Late Assignments That Were Actually True | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
Say I Don't...
Read Modern Family GIF by PeacockTV
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"Making fun of or denigrating one's spouse in social situations. It's a crappy thing to do."
Speak Truthfully
"Not saying what you mean."
"I hate people that do this. Just say exactly what you mean please. Don't beat around the bush. Im not going to waste brain power trying to work out if you mean what you say or something else, and if it's something else I'm not going to bother working out what that is either."
Too Sweet
"The amount of sugar in everything."
"Worse: the amount of "stuff that is supposed to replace sugar" in everything. High Fructose Corn syrup, Partially hydrogenated something or other, imitation saccharine, etc. etc. Some of that stuff is even way worse than sugar."
"time and a half"
"In my industry (manufacturing), mandatory overtime. Pre-covid, it was totally normal for people to have to work 50+ hours a week, sometimes 7 days a week for months at a time. The whole point of "time and a half" was to discourage companies from making people work more than 40 hours regularly. And yet, for most of 2018 and 2019, people like my father in law had to use PTO to be off on a Saturday or Sunday."
- smp501
Run Fast
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"I feel like a lot of "Never turn your back on family" rhetoric is used by abusive people that think they shouldn't face consequences for their bullcrap."
The Hustle...
"Toxic "Hustle Culture": the idea that every moment you're awake, you need to be constantly achieving your goals and getting further in life. Please don't get me wrong: the idea that creating a side hustle, passion project or business on your own is fantastic and should never been discouraged."
"What I'm referring to is this attitude that ANY time not spent furthering your goals is a complete waste. Reading a book? Better make sure it's about an applicable skill for the future. Got two hours to spare? By the stars you better make sure to use them learning coding or a new language."
"It makes me cross because it's a fundamentally dangerous attitude that is advertised to younger folk, especially to those just entering their first jobs out of school or university. Burnout is a real issue that can cause exhaustion and isn't healthy. What really gets my goat is how it's an attitude permeated by companies. It's the whole "there's always someone hungrier than you, better do more to prove yourself."
"To quote Bill Watterson: "as if a job title and salary are the sole measure of someone's worth". It's an easy attitude to push: you keep the new workforce with a mind to work harder than each other to get more, which only discourages them from banding together for fundamental rights like healthcare or PTO. So if you took the time to read this, read a book YOU want, play a game or watch a series that YOU fancy. Not every moment has to be preparing for a never ending future."
I'm Sick
"I don't know about other places but in the US, Internships that delegate actual business responsibilities to interns but don't pay them. If your intern calling in sick would disrupt your workflow they're not an intern they're an employee and they deserve a wage."
A Gamble
"Loot boxes and all forms of in-app, in-game purchases that are just dressed up gambling. Introducing minors to gambling with real money for the chance of unlocking that awesome character is pretty sick. Let's trigger gambling addiction in minors because our game is free and its the only way we can make money!"
Better off Enemies
Shocked Schitts Creek GIF by CBC
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"Not having boundaries with family, particularly between parents and their adult children. I can't believe how frequently "...but they're family!" is used to rationalize and justify disrespect, manipulation, and various forms of abuse."
"they love each other"
"Hating your partner/spouse. It's the dynamic of like 90% of on-screen relationships, that the couple have nothing in common and don't share interests and never do anything together without fighting constantly but "they love each other" so all the toxic, manipulative behavior gets played off for laughs or proof of how "strong" they are. Your partner should be your best friend. You should want to spend time with them. You should enjoy being around them. You should look forward to seeing them when you're apart."
Under Pressure
"The inherent pressure to make your job into your life. I come from a south East Asian country where this is extremely normal especially in the more traditional toxic workplaces. Had a manager go on a rant about how us juniors were young and could afford to work hard, he then proceeded to compare us to other seniors who used to work until 12am everyday to learn the ins and outs of the business."
"Then saying that we should be like them and bragged about how he only used to sleep four hours a day back when he was starting out. My direct manager herself made me work at home despite being on sick leave and recovering from a nasty bout of fever. Just asked how I was feeling before diving straight into 'can you work from home now since you're not feeling too bad'."
Being Casual
"Casual peer pressure. I already said no twice to your offer of a drink, shut up. Ironically, my mom was deathly afraid of it when I was a teenager; some dealer would assuredly convince me to try bad bad drugs but now she's the worst offender."
"Are you me? My parents and older relatives made me terrified of peer pressure as a kid but now I can't be at any social function without them pretty much shoving alcohol in my hand. It's weird how persistent they are and how they act literally offended when I say no."
Cheers...
Over It Drinking GIF by Saturday Night Live
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"Wine mom" culture. It's not cute, it's not quirky. "Mama needs a drink" isn't a personality trait."
- the_itz
Makes my skin crawl...
"This is just me, but my mom is manipulative. It's very subtle, but also very effective. She could easily be the nicest person on the planet, but instead chooses to use her incredible skill to get her way and be petty. I didn't notice it until recently and I've lived with her my entire life. Up until last year I didn't know why I couldn't stand to be around her."
I Hate You
"Don't speak ill of the dead"
"Literally why? if someone was a bad person, then dying doesn't wipe off their sins."
Learn to run, and fast. When it doesn't feel right, trust it. Sometimes it's ok to not be ok or to be alone. Sometimes it's ok to not know every answer. The unknown is better than suffering because we're just used to it.
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The old wives' tales.
They are the stories of legend.
I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.
Where did they originate?
WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!
You don't hear about them as much anymore.
It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.
But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.
Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:
"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"
"Wait an hour to swim after eating."
What a crock!
So many summer hours wasted.
I want revenge for that one.
Say Nothing
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"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."
LonelyMail5115
"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."
I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Say Something
"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."
Severe_Airport1426
"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."
crappycurtains
"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."
AlbinoShavedGorilla
Body Temps
"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."
chriseo22
"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."
"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."
apocalypticradish
Arms Down
"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."
Fatmouse84
10 Years Actually
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"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."
"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."
Gecko-911
I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.
This tale is haunting.
High/Low
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"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."
LeastFormal9366
"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."
IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI
The Cursed
"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."
"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."
SmoreOfBabylon
Stay In
"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."
"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."
worldbound0514
Dreams and Facts
"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."
"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."
mattshonestreddit
"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."
Darthdemented
Cracked
Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office
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"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."
Choice-Grapefruit-44
"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."
MacyTmcterry
I love my knuckles.
Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
Every now and then, a friend of ours might say something, or we might overhear a complete stranger say something that makes us stop in our tracks.
More often than not, what we can't believe we just heard is something so ridiculous, we can't help but put the person who said it in their place.
Other times, however, what we just heard might have stunned us silent because of how shockingly clever it was.
Resulting in our not wanting to scold or yell at someone, but rather give them a handshake.
Redditor SubmergingOriginal was curious to hear the sharpest and wittiest things they've ever heard, from friends and strangers alike, leading them to ask:
"Enough with the dumbest; what is the wittiest thing you've ever heard someone say?"
Don't Give Me So Much Credit...
'I was on a team at work that was on a project working insane overtime."
"One night after an 80-90 hour week, we were all sitting around the table trying to finish up so we could go home."
"Around 11, my buddy's wife called, dubious about the hours he'd been keeping."
"We heard her through the line - 'are you cheating on me?'"
"Exasperated, he looked at our boss, then replied 'honey, if I was cheating on you, I would have been home by now'."- lionbatcher
Eternal Optimism...
"Asked a blind guy if he'd been blind his whole life."
"He said 'Not yet'."- Feeling_Mode_6465
Free time Isn't The Only Thing He Has On His Hands...
"My brother got a vasectomy and when the doctor was releasing him and giving him instructions (with the nurse listening in), one of the orders was to 'come back and have a follow-up appointment after you’ve ejaculated 30 times'.”
"Without missing a beat my brother asked 'what time do you open tomorrow?'”
"The nurse couldn’t keep it together after hearing that."- UtahUtopia
Awkward Season 8 GIF by The Office
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Double Whammy!
"My pal uses the phrase 'he doesn’t look strong enough to carry information' and it cracks me up every time."
"Calling someone stupid and weak in one fell swoop."- JennyW93
Can't Hide Your DNA...
'Whenever I jokingly insult my mum, she says 'that must be where you get it from'."
"She cracked the code."
"I can never offend her without offending myself."- JennyW93
Self-Sufficient!
"My brother was a line cook at a New Orleans restaurant."
"My mom was in town, staying at a fancy hotel, and he stopped by after work, still wearing his kitchen whites."
"He was reading a newspaper in the lobby waiting for her to come down when the shocked lobby manager sputtered at him, 'MAY I HELP YOU!?!?'
"He answered, 'thanks, but I know how to read',” and went back to his paper."- jobrody
Morph Current Affairs GIF by Aardman Animations
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A Miracle!
"My brother-in-law’s comment."
"The entire family went out for my mother’s 80th birthday and after the meal we all went to a local park, largely occupied by the elderly, to rest."
"My mother needed crutches at this point, and they were resting against her bench."
"My 10-year-old niece, who looked like every starving waif image from Dickens, grabbed the crutches and started hobbling round the park."
"All the OAPs were following her progress with looks of pity until my brother ran up behind her, and kicked away the crutches."
"There was an audible gasp from round the park and then my niece picked the crutches back up and started chasing my brother, clearly intending to hit him."
"In the confused silence my brother-in-law’s voice rang out 'Praise be! She can walk again!'"
"We still think this was the highlight of the birthday celebrations."- DdraigGwyn
Still Legal, Whichever Way You Cut It...
"I picked up my pleasantly tipsy boyfriend from a nightclub."
"We were stopped by the Police for a random breath test."
"They asked me my age, and I said, 33."
"My bf blurted out '33? You told me you were 22'."
"Police just laughed and let me go."- Aggravating-Corgi379
Music Video Police GIF by Andrew W. K.
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A Bit Too On The Nose?
"Business law class in college years ago, talking about the issues that black Americans had before the Civil Rights."
"Amendment, trying to travel through the south with the discrimination so rampant, trying to find restaurants to serve them and decent lodgings."
"My instructor was posing a hypothetical: 'So you pull up out front of this place, you're exhausted from driving for hours, and you see the sign out front says 'Ku Klux Klan Motel'."
"'What would you expect to find there?'"
"Without missing a beat, from the back of the room came this gem: "'Extra sheets in every room?'"- NedsAtomicDB
Not Yet, Anyway...
"I was working with my friend and his dad."
"My friend (26) heard an ice cream truck near where we were working."
"He asked his dad if he could have a couple dollars."
"His dad asked, 'what for?'"
"My friend told his dad that there was an ice cream truck in the neighborhood, and that they were playing music."
"My friends dad told him "'They don't charge anything to listen to the music'."- tatersalad1234567890
Words Escape You In The Literal "Heat" Of The Moment...
"A friend of mine is a teacher and her husband is known for his wit."
"She told this story to him:"
"One day at school a kid took the hall pass and returned reeking like smoke."
"She asked the kid if he’d been smoking and he denied it over and over."
"She was about to send him to the office when she noticed smoke coming from somewhere."
"She told the kid and he realized that he didn’t put his cig out completely and it was burning in his pants pocket."
"The kid noticed and frantically tried to put it out and someone finally poured water on it."
"Her husband sat listening to this with a weird look on his face."
"She asked him what was wrong."
“'What’s wrong???'"
"'This was probably the only chance you’ll have in your life to say literally, ‘liar,liar, pants on fire’ and you missed your chance'."- Luder714
On Fire No GIF by PEEKASSO
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Amazing What You Might Say A Few Drinks In...
"When I went to a renaissance faire once, I went to a beer tent and ordered a Newcastle Brown Ale (seemed the most fitting for the surroundings)."
"The beer wench, without skipping a beat, said, 'Everyone wants a Newcastle - no one wants to remodel!'"- jayhof52
Read The Room People!
"My dad wiped out when skiing down a mountain and lost a ski."
"After a few minutes of hunting for it, he gives up, slings the one remaining ski over a shoulder and starts walking down the mountain in his ski boots."
"About half-way down, another skier stops and goes 'Gee! Did you lose a ski?'"
"My dad instantly replied 'No, I was out for a walk and found one!'"- PeterJoAl
There's a reason your mother always told you to "use your words".
As clever remarks can have a much more lasting effect on people than a push or shove.