The heart is an untamable organ; and as much as we'd like to believe we can control it, it always ends up controlling us. For people who make intimacy a career, they too can fall into traps of the amour. Once you're looking into another person's eyes and a spark ignites, all bets are off. People seem to ignore the facet that sex workers are people too and the career field they're in is actually honest work for many. They end up with love stories surrounding their clients just like a banker or a bartender.Redditor u/m033118b wanted to hear about the wantings of the heart, no matter what the profession, by asking.... Sex workers of reddit, have you ever fallen in love with a John? What happened afterwards?
Found Herrichard gere gotta love this film GIF Giphy
When I was in Amsterdam I did a red light tour, and the tour guide told us how when he was young and inexperienced he 'shopped around' the windows for a while, found the beautiful woman he'd ever seen, and kept coming back until he worked up his nerve.
Eventually he went in, stayed in there talking to her until about 4 in the morning, then she took him back to her place, that was nine years before he told us the story and they'd been together since then. She still worked as a sex worker and he was so open about everything, it was really interesting to get such an outlook from a tour guide.
Not the SW, but the partner of one.
I was going through a stressful time in my life and things weren't working out the way I had hoped. I was single and was always making time for other people and never felt like I was getting what I wanted in life. I knew nothing about sex workers at the time, and had never seen one before. I did some research for about a month or so and came across this girl's ad. She seemed legit and from what I could see in her pictures, attractive.
I booked her and was beyond nervous-scared leading up to the appointment. When the day came I went over and the cutest girl ever opened the door and welcomed me in. We talked about ourselves pretty much the entire night. I had only intended for this to be a one-time deal since it's so expensive! But, I decided to see her a few more times. I noticed she started letting me overstay my appointment time more each visit and I started getting suspicious. I didn't know if this was normal, or if she was into me.
I liked her a lot, but I figured this was her job and she probably just wanted to keep me, a steady income, around. She started doing other favors like making me dinner and my mind started going crazy and had to know what was going on. So I confessed that I liked her and hoped that was okay, and asked her to clarify what she had been doing, and what it meant.
Turns out she totally had feelings for me! We decided to date and now we're getting married!
Really happy for the fairy tales people are telling here, but these stories don't end well often.
I had a second degree cousin who was a sex worker in Brazil. Started doing it since her father left her sick mother without a penny and she was a very beautiful girl. Worked as a sex worker for a few years and ended up meeting a Spanish tourist when she was 22 or 21. The guy was prince charming himself. Came back to Brazil a few months after meeting her to marry her and take her to Spain. Was really kind with the entire family, flooded everyone with gifts and sounded like a genuine nice guy.
A few months passed after their marriage and things seem fine, she gets to visit the family, sends updates constantly. Out of nowhere, silence. She completely disappears for years. It was the 90s, before cellphones or social networks. Her mother tried to reach the police, but it was useless. After around 8 or 9 years of silence, she calls back.
According to her, the guy was extremely jealous and abusive. The first signs were weird, but nothing terrifying, in her opinion. But things got worse, with physical and psychological violence, forbidding her of leaving the house until it turned into a situation where she was completely locked off the external world.
She ended up running away from home after many tries and took refugee on a church. While living at that church, she remembered one of her cousin's phone number - one of the few she memorized - and managed to call the family back. Most of us thought she was dead by then. That was in 2004, she had been missing since 95~96.
Now she is married and living in Spain with a regular man she met at the church.
4 Years InClimb In Constance Wu GIF by Hustlers Giphy
My fiancée is a stripper at a bikini bar. I used to frequent her club because my friend's sister was a bartender there and would hook me up on my bar tab. I met my fiancée and got to know her pretty well over the next 2 and a half years, then one night we were both there for my friend's (the bartender) birthday and got pretty drunk. She told me she had a crush on me and then later said she wanted to go home with me, which she did.
A year to the day after that I asked her to marry me, and I've been in the best relationship of my life for almost 4 years.
God, this was years ago when I was 21 but it brings back a lot of emotions even now. One of my regulars was a disabled gentleman in his 50s. He had broken his spine in an industrial accident and was paralyzed from the chest down. He'd gotten a large settlement and invested in property including his beautiful accessible cabin on the lake. He'd pay for me to spend weekends with him there as well as trips to the coast and the casino where he would give me money to play slots or see a show while he played cards.
He was kind and funny and had a comforting nature. I had bad experiences with men, but his disability made him vulnerable and open in a way that moved me and put me at ease. I even learned some of his care routines so I could be with him for longer periods.
He died when he developed a clot in his leg that broke free and got into his lungs. I didn't find out until 2 weeks afterward. His passing really shook me. I thought I had distance. I didn't realize how much I cared for him until he was gone.
Related only, but one of my friends with unlimited business expenses was hosting in NYC clients from London. That night ended up at a strip club across the street from my home, and $1000 dollars in lap dance tickets ($20 each) in the middle of the table.
I tried one, not my thing, so I pocketed 3 of the tickets as souvenirs.
A year later, my nephew was visiting me as he turned 21, so I gave him the 3 tickets and sent him to the strip club. He did not return, but called at 8AM. "I'm making breakfast over at Dawn's place"
They went out for a few months.
A friend's sister and her friend were/are sex workers. They both fell in love with the same customer. The bloke was a biker and I'm pretty sure they loved the free drugs he gave them, not him. They had a huge blow out over this guy and basically didn't take long before they stopped communicating.
They both confessed their love for him and he cut ties with both because he wanted to spend more time with his wife.
Edit for non-Aussie's: Outlaws in Australia once upon a time rode on motorcycles and were/are heavily involved in crime syndicates. We call them bikies (buy-keys) (Australian accent) or singular (buy-key) (Australian accent).
A Good Manryan gosling friend GIF Giphy
I worked as a stripper and fell in love with the manager.
I saw girls always fawning over him- leaving some tips on stage so he would bring them back to the dressing room and they could flirt with him. I assumed it was a phase and tried to ignore my feelings. At the time I was suffering from chronic pain and an eating disorder. He just cared so much and went out of his way to help. We've now been married for 15 years and have three children.
Using my throwaway. I was a sugar baby the moment I turned 18. Started having sex with a 60 year old doctor. I was poor so the constant showering of gifts, money, dinners, vacations, and clothes, I guess made me fall in love with him. All I would think about was "Lonny" (fake name) and what amazing thing Lonny had planned for us that day.
One day I get a call from Lonny and he tells me, we can't see each other anymore because he had caught feelings for me. I took this as my opportunity to tell him how I felt and I really thought we would get married. He then told me, "I can't be in love with a girl like you, so I have to let you go and move on to another girl I don't have feelings for." I was broken and depressed for a long time. I ended up using some of the money he gave me for therapy and eventually I got over it.
I Was WrongJulia Roberts Shopping GIF by SundanceTV Giphy
I'll start with my story to get the ball rolling. Former sex worker.
When I was 18 I began seeing a married man in his early 40s who treated me with respect, genuinely listened and helped me with my school, and we hung out a lot too without having sex. After about 3 months of seeing him almost everyday I started to become attached. Then one day I told him that I thought I was in love with him and he told me, "I still love my wife. I only keep you around for...." I was DEVASTATED and never saw him again.
I've never used the term john, just client. While I haven't fallen head over heels for a client, I definitely have a few clients that I love. It might weird them out so I wouldn't tell them, but it's the truth. You meet some very interesting, caring people in my line of work.
I Miss HimCats Chibi GIF Giphy
Never fallen in love with a client, but I do love some of them. My first ever in person client, and favorite regular is an absolute sweetheart and has a lot of the same kinks as I do, seeing him has the same excitement to it as hooking up with a hot friend. We had to cancel our last session because of lockdown and I miss him a lot.
Getting to know you.....
I worked as a dancer in LA and I met my husband at the club I worked at. We got married last year and have a 2 year old :) We are madly in love and no one knows how we actually met haha. Our life is beautiful together :)
Most people don't realize most of sex work is actually just getting to know someone very intimately. Lots of clients just want to talk, to have a bond, to forget something. Sometimes that bond is simply business but its no surprise that people do fall in love 💓.
I was a regular customer of a camgirl back some time ago. After few stints I gradually started telling her not to take off her clothes and just talk to me, I loved her personality. She gave me her skype, and I thought, ok, and after one or two skype meetings I asked her for her paypal to transfer the money. She was pretty angry because she thought this was a friendship or a dating call and she said she liked my weirdness and general demeanor. We continued skyping for some 2 months more, and now we are actually friends!
Married the guy that was obsessed with me, came to the strip club I worked at every shift I worked for like 8 months until I finally went out with him. Married 15 years, now getting divorced.
Dance of the Lap
Yes but I never really considered him a "John" He was a "regular" but he would just come in the club and we would have great conversations and would pay for a dance just to be polite since I was working but really didn't even want a lap dance. He isn't a lap dance guy, just has grown up with art scene people so enjoyed certain types of strippers and found them interesting, and a great way to take a break from his now corporate life. We quickly became more friends outside of work and if he came in while I was working it would be expected he pay me for my time but he had the money to spend so he didn't care.
Then eventually we started going on dates and we became official and he would just drop me off at the club on the way to work and pick me up after. A year later we moved across the country together and we're coming up on 2 yrs. we haven't fought once and very happy.
As someone that dated a sex worker, I just want to let any clients and potential clients know: sure. This happens. But it is very very rare, and if you are ever starting to get the feeling that she is into you, there is about a one in ten million chance that she actually is. It just means that she's doing her job well, and that you as a client are not. It's their job to make it feel real. It's your job to remember it isn't.
BenefitsJimmy Fallon Hay GIF Giphy
One of my closest friends started out buying content and Skype shows. We now talk on a daily basis and have visited each other several times. As a matter of fact he'll be coming to see me in a couple weeks! We have sex and say we love each other and ultimately we are kinky pals. I would call it a casual long distance relationship as we are not pursuing anything different but are appreciative of our place in each other's lives. We say we are bffs with benefits. 😌
Like the Movies
I had to travel out of the country to attend my sister's wedding. The best man was my ex-fiancé (he dumped me) so I couldn't stand the thought of going alone. So I hired an escort to go with me and pretend to be my boyfriend. But he ended up being the most wonderful man and we fell in love. Worth every penny.
Happily EverLove Story Wedding GIF by angiecandell Giphy
I'll keep it short and sweet.
I was at work when we met. I quit working and found another job shortly after. We've been together ever since. He turned out to be the love of my life.
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We aren't perfect. There's plenty of things in our pasts that we look back and cringe at.
That being said, sometimes those cringe moments go far past cringe. Sometimes they get to the point of no return awfulness because that's where our human nature took us in this moment.
He's Not Dead<p>When I was 17 my brother walked into a room where I was lying down on my back and stamped on my chest. </p><p>I saw red and stood up and punched him square in the face, unfortunately this was in a doorway in front of a staircase, which he fell down backwards and when he hit the wall at the bottom folded up in such a way I thought I'd killed him. </p><p>He didn't move for what seemed like forever and I was certain he was dead, the world just spinning out around me. </p><p>He wasn't dead, obviously, but knocked out briefly and he never laid a finger on me again, after being the kind of nasty bully who had spent much of my childhood just randomly beating on me for his own enjoyment.</p><p>Those were the longest seconds of my life.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/MrSpindles/" target="_blank">MrSpindles</a></p>
Complete And Total Taking Over<p>I don't know about "haunts" but it makes me cringe. In public school we had this thing in our school called 'Jumpstart for Kids' where you'd go around, often door to door, collecting money for this charity once a year. </p><p>Anyway I was 12 and I liked a boy in highschool and he convinced me to take the envelope and go door to door and collect money... to give to him so he could buy a drum set. </p><p>I walked around collecting from all these sweet people who told me I was so nice for collecting money for underprivileged kids. Fortunately I got caught and my parents made me donate it instead. So embarrassing.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/heather-rch/" target="_blank">heather-rch</a></p>
Scene Of The Crime<p>Provincial Park, pay shower, 12 years old, line-up to get in. Towards the end of my turn in the shower, get the urge to poop. Cannot hold it. Using a sock to smoosh the last of it down the drain, water turns off. Out of quarters. Put a towel over my head, run out of there past the line-up.</p><p> Get back to the camp site, immediately change clothes, shoes, hairstyle, put on a ball cap. Work up the courage to go by the area later on, it is all cordoned off. Hear people angrily discussing how someone took a dump in the shower.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/eskerhobolo/" target="_blank">eskerhobolo</a></p>
When Bullying A Bully Isn't Worth It<p>We had a camper in this large campground at a lake when I was growing up. Tons of families with kids riding bicycles and golf carts up and down the gravel roads through the property. </p><p>There was this one kid that was a few years older than me (I was 10, he was probably 12 or so) who's dad was the security guard and they lived on site and he was the biggest punk in the park. He'd try and wrestle you in the pool, throw rocks at you as you were fishing, ride off on your bike if you left it laying around, bully and hit smaller kids, even girls. </p><p>I was driving the golf cart down a pretty steep, gravel hill one day when I came up on him on his bike, going the same way as me. He never turned around to acknowledge I was there so I got up just to the side of him and turned HARD right into him. We were both going probably 10-15 miles an hour down this hill. </p><p>He took a nasty spill and rolled off the side of the road and wasn't moving. I kept on going, acting like nothing happened. We were completely isolated so no one saw me. I remember him getting taken away in an ambulance and hearing that he'd been hurt pretty bad.</p><p> I immediately felt remorse for what I'd done but never said a word to anyone. He or anyone else never had any idea I did it either. I look back now and think about how much of a financial strain I put on that family, seeing as how they were already living in a camper. That was a really REALLY evil thing I did and it still crosses my mind quite often.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/harp9r/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">harp9r</a></p>
Not Hurting<p>So you know the carnival horses you can sit on outside of grocery stores (back in the 90's). Well I wanted to ride one and this sweet old woman tried to help me get on, slipped, and really really hurt herself falling into the ride. I just remember hearing her scream and I got scared and ran away.<br></p><p>I'm 31 years old and think about that day at least once a week.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/packhawk2689/" target="_blank">packhawk2689</a></p>
Gotta Get Up, Gotta Get Out<p>Easy. When I was 5, I burned my house down.</p><p>We were living in a small home, me, my sister, mom, dad. I was supposed to be in the bed, but I wanted a toy or <em>something</em> that was under my bed, and I didn't want to wake my parents by turning on my light... soooo I grabbed my dad's cigarette lighter and light the flame under my bed. Needless to say it went up like a match. </p><p>My dad tried to stomp the fire out after I started screaming fire, burning his leg horribly. My room and the source of the fire was blocking EVERY other bedroom from escape, so everyone had to jump out of a window. Funnily enough, I don't remember the world-class a** whipping I must have received for that. I just cringe at the thought that I almost killed all of us being a dumb kid.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Paradigm_Pizza/" target="_blank">Paradigm_Pizza</a></p>
Escape<p>I was married to an insanely abusive man. After two years I escaped and he killed himself shortly after. Not sure if it was him avoiding charges, or avoiding his deployment but his family decided it was 100% my fault. They told the police I gave him the gun and encouraged him. </p><p>That was investigated and unfounded. What they didn't know was he'd scanned and emailed me his suicide note the wee hours of the morning of. The police didn't find the note. Of course I handed it over when they asked. His family would not believe I wasn't involved or at fault and harassed me for a long time. </p><p>If I got a job and they found out about it they'd call and leave so many complaints I'd get let go. Found out what I drove and had their other kids and their friends follow me. </p><p>I ended up having to leave that town and disappearing to avoid them. But before I did, I printed a copy of his suicide note, found his moms car at her job, and left it on the window shield. That note detailed the abuse his father put him through, his rage at his mother for never leaving him and making himself and his siblings live with the SOB. </p><p>That he never wanted me to blame myself, that this was his way of getting the hell away from them and the damage he caused. I felt pretty bad for awhile. But at the same time.... they literally wouldn't leave me alone and stalked me for 5 years.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/TinyTinasRabidOtter/" target="_blank">TinyTinasRabidOtter</a></p>
If You Give A Pup A Shower<p>Bored in the house one day alone when I was about 10, so decided to give my dog a shower, I genuinely loved my dog, he was my best friend growing up, but for some unknown reason I decided to turn the shower onto hot water only (extremely hot) and started showering him. There was a delay I guess in him reacting because his fur was so thick, which meant I kept it on him for a few seconds.</p><p>suddenly He started yelping like dogs do when in pain, his instincts were to not be aggressive or try to escape but just looked at me scared and confused.</p><p>I panicked smashed on the cold and cooled him down as quick as I could.</p><p>Fortunately he was not 'burnt' or had any ongoing issues, he never even lost trust in me.</p><p>I felt physically sick and ashamed in myself for days after, and obviously it still bothers me 20 years later.</p><p>The good thing to come from it is that I was so disturbed by my action that I have never knowingly inflicted pain on anyone or anything since.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/ChrisLeeHD/" target="_blank">ChrisLeeHD</a></p>
Caught In The Act<p>I was at school and for no reason at all, I eavesdropped a very private and delicate conversation between one of my teachers and her husband. </p><p>Then she opened the door and saw me eavesdropping. It was beyond humiliating and I deserved the scolding afterwards. I was young and stupid obviously, but when I remember the look on her face, I still cringe hard, even if it's been almost 20 years.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/naydeilinsei/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">naydeilinsei</a></p>
Shunned<p>Second grade, I had a classmate (fake name Sasha) who was kinda awkward. Crooked teeth, quiet, not too bright. Didn't really have any friends within the class, though she did have some people she would hang out with at recess. </p><p>In any case, a boy in the grade above us, a friend of my brother's actually, for some reason decided to spread a rumor among all of us that Sasha had lice and to stay away from her. </p><p>I bought it without a second thought, and so did most of us; as far as I know, she wasn't particularly teased, but she was just shunned. No one talked to her. </p><p>She was around till the end of the year and didn't come back for third grade. No clue what happened to her, but I really hope we didn't mess her up too much.</p><p>Next summer, I got the worst case of head lice my pediatrician had ever seen. Karma, my dudes.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Isabel79540/" target="_blank">Isabel79540</a></p>
I don't miss high school or the people in it. People who seem to have peaked in high school also weird me out. How? Why? I can definitely tell you that life got much more interesting the older I got (my 20s were way more fun than any of my time in high school). If you were to ask me if I have any regrets, I suppose I would say that I wish I had been more assertive and stood up for myself more. Depression has a way of complicating goals like that, though. Let me tell you: It feels nice to be so much healthier than I was then.
After Redditor Sub2735 asked the online community, "What's your biggest regret from high school?" people shared their stories.
"I'm sure the mentality..."<p>Being too shy, I'm sure the mentality that everyone hated me wasn't very good for making friends.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv5ytu/what_is_your_biggest_regret_from_high_school/gpad84o?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">aeflare</a></p>
"I'm not sure how it could have gone differently..."<p>Dropping out. I am not sure how it could have gone differently, but I do wish it had. It was expensive to upgrade all that education to get into post-secondary, and I also missed out on a lot of social things.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv5ytu/what_is_your_biggest_regret_from_high_school/gpafhng?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">DaughterEarth</a></p>
"I was already pretty cynical..."<p>I was told I had received a full-ride scholarship, so I stopped putting in any effort on other scholarships. When the time came, it wound up being awarded to someone who applied late, got it due to their family's income level, and then dropped out of college after one month. My first two years of college were a financial nightmare as I had to pay my own way on everything (except rent, as I lived at home and commuted across state lines for work and college). If I had $50 at the end of the month, that was a damn good month. I couldn't get student loans and my parents refused to help, so I had worked out a deal with the financial office at college to pay something like $550 a month, which was about 90% of my income.</p><p>I regret not confronting whoever made that decision about the scholarship. I somewhat regret not putting in the effort to get other scholarships at the same time, but I can't blame myself for it either.</p><p>I was already pretty cynical at that point, but that was when I realized just how quickly your back becomes a knife block for someone else's optics.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv5ytu/what_is_your_biggest_regret_from_high_school/gpalo5m?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">A_Garbage_Account</a></p>
"I used to daydream..."<p>I used to daydream about going back one day and burning it to the ground, but it's just been demolished by land developers. So I guess that dream's dead.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv5ytu/what_is_your_biggest_regret_from_high_school/gpafcpx?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">EducationTangle06</a></p>
I suppose the phrase, "Always follow your dreams"...<p>...doesn't apply in this case.</p>
"Acting like a clown..."<p>Acting like a clown, annoying everyone to the point where no one really stayed in contact with me after, and taking my precious little charter school for granted.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv5ytu/what_is_your_biggest_regret_from_high_school/gpae5ak?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">SalFunction12</a></p>
I have a friend who has expressed similar concerns about his time in high school.<p>He ended up spending his college years going to therapy and maturing. His clownish antics were a coping mechanism for a lot of crap going on in his life at the time. He's happier and healthier now and that's what matters.</p>
"To be fair..."<p><span>Dating my best friend. To be fair that's how I found out a lot of people weren't really my friends but getting ghosted afterward really hurt.</span></p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv5ytu/what_is_your_biggest_regret_from_high_school/gpasudw?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">kannacantplay</a></p>
"She got tired..."<p>I took my crush to Daft Punk Alive 2007 instead of my best friend. She wasn't responding all day, and I was with my friend. We were about to leave when she called. She'd been with her boyfriend all day and had forgotten about the concert. I took her. My buddy was disappointed but cool about it.</p><p>She got tired of being on the floor halfway through so we sat in the bleachers. We started walking out before the encore because she wanted to get home sooner.</p><p>Always wanted to take my buddy to a Daft Punk show after that, and was going to, no matter where or how much it cost. But I'll never get the chance.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv5ytu/what_is_your_biggest_regret_from_high_school/gpbd6so?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">spanishgrapelaw</a></p>
"Looking back now..."<p>I regret not telling my crushes how I felt about them. Looking back now, I know that those puppy love relationships probably wouldn't have developed into anything long term and I no doubt would've had my heart broken when they inevitably ended but, I can't help but wonder: What if?</p><p>Having cultivated a host of insecurities by the time I got to high school, I was really good at hiding my inner thoughts and feelings - I also probably didn't see myself very clearly. So, I just assumed that there was zero chance of my crushes reciprocating my feelings and never said anything to them about it. I also probably sub-consciously ignored any signs that they were interested in me (again, didn't see myself clearly, was very insecure).</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv5ytu/what_is_your_biggest_regret_from_high_school/gpazwl2?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Vegoceraptor</a></p>
"The world is wider..."<p>Not engaging with opportunities available to me and just looking at it like a holding pen just before adulthood.</p><p>It may seem hokey, but join clubs, try out lots of sports, pursue interests, pay attention in class and engage with your peers.</p><p>The world is wider for adolescents than I allowed myself to believe it was at the time.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv5ytu/what_is_your_biggest_regret_from_high_school/gpaxnsf?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Big_Requirement_3540</a></p>
"I already knew I was quitting..."<p>Senior year I had the option of a guaranteed internship and doing half days at school. Turned it down because my parents wanted me to be in band (and I enjoyed it so didn't put up a fight).</p><p>I already knew I was quitting when I went to college. The internship would have been great experience to propel my studies/career.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv5ytu/what_is_your_biggest_regret_from_high_school/gpatszd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ClubbsMcLubbs</a></p>
High school isn't easy.<p>Nor is it particularly fun for a lot of people. Remember how awful being a teenager was? Remember what it was like to feel like you were at the whim of your hormones all the time? It's an emotional rollercoaster. It's no wonder so many people would rather close the book on high school once it's over (or have some regrets related to their time there).</p><p>Have your own stories? Feel free to share them in the comments below.</p>
When we are on the outside looking in, it can feel so obvious that a relationship is doomed.
When we offer advice to friends, family, or people oversharing at a party, the correct next move often seems wildly obvious: get out of that relationship.
Enough Was Enough<p>"He was mentally ill, possibly with Paranoid Personality Disorder, definitely delusional, maybe schizophrenic. I was accused of all types of things, affairs, being part of plots to 'get' him, even urinating on his toothbrush."</p><p>"I stayed for 3 years after I knew I no longer loved him because I knew he would spiral without someone to look after him. He had destroyed every relationship with his friends and family because they were all also out to 'get' him."</p><p>"I finally told him I would only stay if he got help, which he refused. So I left."</p><p>"I was right about him spiralling. He went from sharehouse to sharehouse as all the other tenants were 'out to get him'. He eventually ended up homeless for a while is now facing 18 different charges so will probably end up in jail."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv3k1j/seriouspeople_who_have_stayed_with_someone_they/gpal6ip?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">damekl</a></p>
An Unfortunately Common Response to Fading Love<p>"She threatened to kill herself and even though I wanted out of the relationship, i didnt want her to be hurt or die. I remember us arguing about something very trivial but she was getting very upset. She walked out mid conversation and came back with cuts all over her legs and thighs."</p><p>"I tried getting help from parents, school counselors, doctors. None helped. So i just tried to manage as much as I can. Eventually she joined the military & moved away and that was the moment I was finally free."</p><p>"Years wasted though."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv3k1j/seriouspeople_who_have_stayed_with_someone_they/gpab7fm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">corazon_im_hurt</a></p>
A Bare Bones Story<p>"Short version: domestic violence."</p><p>"Long version: I was afraid to leave because I believed he would find me and kill me."</p><p>"Conclusion: He pushed me too far and I ran."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv3k1j/seriouspeople_who_have_stayed_with_someone_they/gpaizjk?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">AliceMorgon</a></p>
Tipping Over the Edge<p>"He was a violent drug addict and I was scared of what he may do if I left. I never truly loved him but our relationship became very codependent very quickly."</p><p>"He cheated on me, took advantage of the fact that I had a car and money, but I still stayed because he was always threatening to kill himself or to kill my cats."</p><p>"Then one night he literally backed me into a corner and tried to punch me in the head so that finally made me open my eyes and realize I had to get out."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv3k1j/seriouspeople_who_have_stayed_with_someone_they/gpb5z6l?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Theging96666</a></p>
Optics<p>"She's terminally ill, and dying of Cancer, even though she is abusive now, and was before, I can't really leave, the social pressure to be a *good man* plus the cost of divorce and everything else is just too much, at this point it's just easier to wait it out."</p><p>"Plus I really like her family, and if I left her when she was sick...it would pretty much kill that relationship."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv3k1j/seriouspeople_who_have_stayed_with_someone_they/gpbm18j?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Boise_State_2020</a></p>
Always a Reason to Stay<p>"We were living together at 16, she cheated on me and I told her I wanted her to leave, she begged me not to send her back to her moms house because they have like 8 people in a 2 bedroom house and because she would've had nowhere else to go."</p><p>"I was 16 I didn't know how to handle a girl literally begging me so I let her stay against my better judgement and it created a hurtful cycle of falling in and out of love."</p><p>"Feeling like things could get better and then having my world come crashing down every time I look at her because I think of reading the message of the guy saying he loved watching her get on top of him."</p><p>"A couple of years go by and we're not in love, just tolerating each other at this point and then we got pregnant, stayed together through the pregnancy but the stress was too much for both of us and caused fighting, sleeping apart, more cheating."</p><p>"When the baby was born she had finally turned 18 and we moved away our relationship got much better with each other, we're best friends now and are just trying our best to raise our daughter to be healthy and happy and know she's loved."</p><p>"Neither of us had good childhoods."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv3k1j/seriouspeople_who_have_stayed_with_someone_they/gpa47ed?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Lapidot-Wav</a></p>
For the In-Laws<p>"I lived with a man I never loved. His mum was also living with us and I loved her more than my own biological mum."</p><p>"She was the nicest, kindest and the most caring soul I have ever met in my life. I left that man when he told me that he knew I was only with him because of his mum. That was 20 years ago but I still miss her every single day."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv3k1j/seriouspeople_who_have_stayed_with_someone_they/gpbz7av?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Mayfl21</a></p>
A Sudden Shift<p>"I was with my wife for 14 years. For at least half of that, I wasn't happy with the relationship. But I had decided I was ok with it because everything about our life together was acceptable, for lack of a better word."</p><p>"We owned a house, made good money, got along well, shared hobbies, etc. We were basically roommates/best friends who just didn't love each other the way you would normally expect from a married couple."</p><p>"When the pandemic hit, and we were forced to stay home more and spend time with each other EVERY DAY, we started to get a better sense of how well we actually tolerated each other. It didn't go well."</p><p>"She ended up getting really into online gaming and met some other guys and basically cheated on me. In retrospect, it was obvious it would reach that point."</p><p>"But I was content to stay there as long as I could because it was a comfortable life with very little stress and obligation."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv3k1j/seriouspeople_who_have_stayed_with_someone_they/gpaadi2?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">knucklehead923</a></p>
Slow Fade<p>"I was no longer as 'in love' with her. But I still loved her. After years together it could become tricky to figure out exactly what It's just a lull and what is it really going away."</p><p>"I was still living with my best friend. But ended it because once we really realized that I wasn't feeling the same way anymore. I was just hurting her for me to stay since she was still in love."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv3k1j/seriouspeople_who_have_stayed_with_someone_they/gpa6h2s?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">collin3000</a></p>
Wise, But a Little Sad<p>"We have good chemistry and built a life together. After a lot of years, love comes and goes. It is like the seasons."</p><p>"As cold as it can be in the winter, if you put the effort in, the spring will always come back."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lv3k1j/seriouspeople_who_have_stayed_with_someone_they/gpa41jl?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Aizpunr</a></p>
Some people don't take breakups very well. And those that don't can sometimes engage in behavior that others might view as bothersome, unsettling, even toxic.
Others engage in abusive behavior during the relationship, a major red flag that some people might not take seriously until it's too late.
After Redditor XYZ3110 asked the online community, "What's the creepiest thing an ex has done?" people shared their stories.