
People Who Have Hooked Up With Their Friends' Parents Reveal How It Went Down
[rebelmouse-image 18353768 is_animated_gif=Talk about awkward... people share their hookup stories but involving sex with friends' parents. Just... no. Ok maybe.
sirferrell asked, Those of you who've actually had sex with a friends mom or dad, how did it go down?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
WTF dad?
[rebelmouse-image 18357969 is_animated_gif=I know a girl who cheated on her BF of 5 years with his dad.
She and the dad are married now.
No offense, but... Florida.
[rebelmouse-image 18357970 is_animated_gif=I got an IRL story like this. Dude I'm distantly related to was expecting a baby with his wife. Pretty normal.
He and wife start fighting. Wife tells him it's not his baby. It's... dun, dun, duh... his dad's. Dude doesn't really believe it, confronts dad, dad cops to it. This causes issues with dudes parents and they separate. Dudes separated from his wife. So... the wife and dad move in together.
Long story short, dude suddenly doesn't have a wife or family or child, goes on big alcohol/drug binge (we're pretty redneck down here). Lots of intoxicated driving. Dude gets in an accident and is killed.
Mom and dad reconcile while grieving, now Mom and Dad and Wife and a new baby all live together.
Welcome to Central Florida.
Women can be creeps too ya know.
[rebelmouse-image 18357971 is_animated_gif=Had sex with my mom's friends, pretty traumatic experience in all honesty.
She had always been the "cool mom" out of my moms friend group, hooked me up with my first job at a catering company she worked for, snuck me and my friends alcohol from time to time, etc. it was also pretty apparent her marriage was on the rocks for some time.
One night we were both working a catering event together that had an open bar, and she had quite a bit to drink and began flirting a little. She would ask me questions about if I had ever been with an older woman.
Fast forward to the end of the night she was my ride home and was too drunk to drive so I drove her car home to my dad's place, as soon as I parked the car she forced my hands on her breasts and started fondling.
I eventually caved in and proceeded to receive the most painful blow job of my life that left actual marks and awkward van sex.
Not quite the wild pool boy story, but I was hoping to shed some light on how ugly these scenarios can wind up.
He was the breathalyzer.
[rebelmouse-image 18357972 is_animated_gif=So he wasn't really a friend per se...
I used to buy weed from him in my mid-20s and he was about 20 and lived with his mom.
She was late 40s... Went by once and he was just leaving, his mom asked if I wanted to drive her to the bar. Turns out she had had a few and currently had a breathalyzer in her car... I knew I was getting laid whether I wanted it or not.
Anyway, fun night. Never went by there again.
There's an age of consent for a reason...
[rebelmouse-image 18357973 is_animated_gif=My friend's mom in high school went through a nasty divorce and his dad quickly married his much younger girlfriend. She began flirting with me a few weeks later and eventually it led to us hooking up. Over the following months I learned nearly everything I know about sex from her. I found out later that year I was one of several friends she'd been hooking up with. I was devastated as my young mind thought I was in love. It sent me into a pretty serious depression and f_cked up my views of sex since.
Please let me out of the car.
[rebelmouse-image 18357974 is_animated_gif=I didn't know he was her dad, he was just someone I was sleeping with but one night when we were out driving, we drove past my old high school and he mentioned that his daughter went there. I made the connection with the surname and asked, he confirmed.
And he learned Spanish!
[rebelmouse-image 18351649 is_animated_gif=I was 23 and she was 44. Her son and I were friends and in college together. She was 5'2", thin, really cute and originally from the Dominican Republic. She had always kind of flirted with me, but I just thought that's all it was. I was wrong.
A bunch of us got together and went out to have dinner on NYE, and she went with us. We all had fun and went back to her house. Her son and his girlfriend went to bed and before I was able to get out the door, she asked me to sit beside her, by the fireplace. She leaned her head on my shoulder and looked up at me and asked: "Do you want to?". Couldn't say yes fast enough.
She and I dated for two and half years. As a bonus, I learned a good deal of Spanish from her.
Some serious NSFW revenge.
[rebelmouse-image 18357975 is_animated_gif=Her daughter dumped me for a guy she didn't like and I fell on hard times with my mom, so I would occasionally go over there to shower and eat something. She was in her 40's, very thin but had a very nice face and was always very nice to me. I was 18 and always very complimentary to her and thankful for her helping me out. She was helping me without her daughter's knowledge as well. One day a hug goodbye got really long. She wouldn't let go, but she wasn't doing anything else. Just hanging on very tight. Being 18 and because of our relationship, I developed an instant erection. I guess she felt it and nuzzled closer. I started kissing her neck. Pulled her dress up. I guess her husband didn't really pay attention to her. (Something I didn't notice or pay attention to while I was dating her daughter.) We went at it for a few hours as the house was empty. She must've been pent up. It was honestly surreal. It didn't set in for a few days. My ex and my friends were all intertwined. I couldn't tell anyone and never have. Happened a few more times until I had my life in order and it seemed like she was starting to regret cheating on her husband.
"Come see my artwork and chill."
[rebelmouse-image 18357976 is_animated_gif=I had sex with an ex-girlfriend's mom. She broke up with me and a couple of weeks later I ran into her mom in the grocery store. Her mom commented that she missed me being around and I said I missed her too, she was a pretty cool mom. She told me that her divorce got finalized, her sister was going to move in and some other small talk type stuff that we both shared as we walked around the store.
I helped her put her groceries in her car and she hugged me. She told me I should come over sometime and see her new paintings, she was an artist. I went over a week or so later and she served me some wine and basically seduced me and introduced me to role play at the same time. We saw each other for over a year and then she moved, I miss her sometimes.
Yeah dude that counts.
[rebelmouse-image 18357977 is_animated_gif=I had sex with my son's girlfriends mom. Does that count?
Revenge, blissful revenge.
[rebelmouse-image 18357978 is_animated_gif=Friend of mine slept with my sister and kept making a big deal about it (I honestly could've cared less), and his mom was always making offhand sexual comments when I was around her so I decided to go for it. She had him when she was 16, we were around 18-19, so she wasn't old and still looked pretty good. Came through one day knowing he wasn't there after flirting with her pretty hard for a few weeks and she almost immediately jumped my bones. We slept together for a while after and neither of us ever said a word about it. It was fun while it lasted and I didn't stay friends with the guy for other reasons.
And then some follow up...
[rebelmouse-image 18357979 is_animated_gif=My buddy does this about my sister he f_cked after I moved away to college. But I don't mention that I used to f_ck his now-wife right before they started dating.
This is some real game.
[rebelmouse-image 18357980 is_animated_gif=I was 18 and my GF and I went to the zoo with her mom and my GF ended up throwing some kind of temper tantrum. Since her mother drove it was an awkward car ride home. I wouldn't even talk to her, and I looked over and she was giving me a death stare and said: do you want to break up. I sat there for a second and her mom said she was going to drop her, my GF and drive me the rest of the way home. I said yeah, yeah I do.
She dropped her daughter off and drove me home. I joked that my plan to get to her via her daughter had worked. She laughed at that and said I'd be lost and have no idea what to do with her. I blushed so hard at that and she saw it.
It took me a few minutes to gather my thoughts and figured: I'm going to flirt. Her mom since the day I met her would always wear tighter shirts and hip-hugging jeans around me. She was a recently divorced woman who may have been lonely, who knows. So I made a flirty comment about her looking fitter every time I came over.
We get back to my house, my parents aren't there and she had joked about taking the day off to come and use my pool. So I used that and said, it's a great night for night swimming. I fully expected her to just laugh and tell me to get out. But she said ok and there I was with my now ex GFs mother in my pool, she's in her undies and we are making out. The following weekend my now ex went to her dad's for the weekend and I stayed the weekend with her mother and we messed around. It went on for a few weeks more but broke it off when her daughter started suspecting it.
I don't regret it and we both had a lot of fun.
What a classy account.
[rebelmouse-image 18357981 is_animated_gif=I went from a known screw up to "the guy with his s*** together," at least in my town. I graduated, joined the military, got out and started a business. After my business stabilized a few months ago, I went home and visited an old HS friend who's mooching off of his mom, just like his dad. Anyway, the friend invited me over for dinner but I showed up early and he ended up flaking. So mom, dad and I had dinner together. It got pretty tense because dad didn't like me too much. He thought I was home just to show off my new life (kind of was), and he didn't care to hear about it at all. But she wouldn't stop asking me about it, causing him to get super annoyed and leave. Our conversation carried on into the evening, and my friend finally stumbled in clearly drunk. His mom just looked embarrassed and disappointed. I took him up to his room and tucked him into bed. When I came downstairs she hugged me telling me how proud of me she was and that watching me turn out like this was heartwarming. She was the first person to say anything of the sort, since to my parents I'm still a screw-up. While hugging my lips touched her neck and she squeezed me closer. From there you can all figure out what happened next. I was still home for a few more days after that and since my parents didn't appreciate my presence, I stayed with them. Interestingly enough, staying with them made the dad warm up to me. As of now, no one else knows except my business partner and the lovely people of Reddit.
He listened to the right head.
[rebelmouse-image 18357982 is_animated_gif=No sex, because I stopped myself. I was 18 and it was my very hot aunt by marriage who was my uncle's wife and my mom's good friend. I visited her sometimes when the uncle wasn't around because she was the "cool aunt" who was always telling me, "hey, stop by anytime and use my place like a crash pad during the day. Bring your gf if I'm not around and do whatever you guys do. I'll give you a key. You know me, I'm cool." I found out just how cool she was.
I stopped by one day and she was drinking a bit and she made a little joke about me being a big boy and then pushed up HARD. I had very little self-control and dove at her. She laughed and we started to get into it but she pushed me back slightly and told me to slow down because we had time. That snapped me out of it enough to make me realize that if I did this, at some point, she was going to pissed off at my uncle and let it slip as a "F--- you" to him, and I was eventually going to have to deal with my uncle & cousin & mom. Not worth it. Noped out of there.
Would've been hot but could've wrecked a lot of stuff. Much better not to have.
...there are some unanswered questions here.
[rebelmouse-image 18357983 is_animated_gif=My buddy's mom had recently gotten divorced, I went to his house looking for him so we could go play baseball. He had already left but she invited me in anyway, it escalated quick. Other one was a woman I worked with, she asked if I wanted to go out for drinks one night, I had a fake ID so I went for it. Went back to her place and did the deed. Woke up the next morning to her making breakfast, went into the kitchen to see her and her two kids were sitting at the kitchen table. Recognized them instantly, I previously dated her daughter freshman year and I played football with her son. I had no idea how old she was when I went out with her and didn't know her kids were older.
Her username is totally misleading.
[rebelmouse-image 18357984 is_animated_gif=When I was nineteen, I ended up in a mental hospital for a suicide attempt and one of the ladies in one of my group therapy groups was the mom of this guy I had gone to high school with. She was separated from her husband at the time and she and I got along well.
After I got out of the hospital she and I would hang out and talk or go to the movies. One day, I apparently seduced her (not exactly on purpose) and we sorta started sleeping together a lot. She divorced her husband told her family she was a lesbian and said she felt like she always had been gay but didn't know it. She went full on LGBT empowerment! This was the early nineties in the Bible Belt and she was a just out 48-year-old. She starting dating different women and last I saw her, she seemed very happy
Well he tried, but you know how these things go.
[rebelmouse-image 18357985 is_animated_gif=I always had the hots for her. Nothing happened except some decent text messages and one other make out session for another year, and I moved away.
I'm 21 and living back in my hometown. She had three kids, all my age, and we hung out occasionally.
We got drunk one night and I promised my friend I wasn't gonna bang his mom. Well, she started cuddling up close to me and it was game over
We don't talk about Bruno... and all of the other crazies in the family.
Maybe that is why that song struck such a chord... we can all relate to family secrets and family crazy.
Even though every generation has gotten a little more open and willing to discuss trauma, we still have a long way to go.
There is something to be said for not airing out all of the dirty laundry.
Everybody doesn't have to know private business.
Redditor istrx13 was wondering things families don't talk about...
They asked:
"What is the 'we don’t talk about that' in your family?"
I'm not getting into my family. You'll have to wait for the play.
The 30s...
"My great aunt was a nurse supervisor at a mental hospital back in the 1930s. She fell in love with a patient who was being evaluated to stand trial for murder. She helped him escape and they went to Florida to hide out. But they were eventually found and the guy was put on trial and got the chair. My aunt got off easy, but she moved far away and rarely came home."
p38-lightning
he didn't make it...
"The brother that was born between me and my first sister. It was my mothers second child. Apparently he only lived about 3 days. Neither my mom nor my dad ever wanted to talk about it much. My sisters and I both have seen the birth certificate, which my parents kept."
"We also know there were about 3 years where they waited before my mom became pregnant with my sister afterward. Both of my parents are deceased now and to be frank, I think I only got about a paragraph of conversation about it, ever, from either of my parents. Just a, 'he didn't make it.'"
"It's not creepy or some strange thing, it's just sad. You can tell it affected them both very powerfully, especially to go the rest of their lives and not really share it with current and future children they had. It must have been horrible."
suddenlyreddit
Now that she's dead...
"My mother's cult-induced severe mental illness, which caused her to viciously abuse her two oldest children verbally and physically, and forced my dad to have her committed to a mental hospital several times. Now that she's dead, we still don't talk about her much, lest she "come back from beyond the grave" and continue her lunatic ways..."
LusciousLennyStone
“drama”
"That I have been in contact with my birth family. My older brother and I are both adopted, but he has publicly stated that he has no intention to contact his own birth family, because, he feels that it would be disrespectful to the parents that have raised us, like, why mess with a good thing?"
"So, I’ve never told him that I did it. My husband also didn’t think I should contact them, he was concerned that there would be 'drama.' I keep in touch with some of my birth family mostly online and so far there’s been no drama."
Relevant_Proposal_63
Hey Stud
"That my late uncle was a gigolo. Only my father and I know the truth."
KazumaWillKiryu
Now being a gigolo has got to be a great story. Tell us more...
"always is right"
"My 'always right' aunty got proven wrong for once and rather than just accept it, she ghosted the whole family except for her immediate. Sometimes I talk to my cousins and always ask how wrong Wendi is doing?"
-AntiVegan-
"silver fox"
"How my uncle, whom is a single, 'silver fox' (so my grandma calls him), multimillionaire, executive of one of the big 3 car companies is secretly gay. We ALL know except grandma, that's why we don't talk about it. He also has no idea that the whole family knows."
laurmichele
All the Feels
"Sex, love, anorexia, emotions in general."
Constant-Memory-1069
"Mate, literally same. My parents are the most emotionally unavailable people I have ever met. It's not really their fault bc my entire family is cooked mental health wise, but damn."
"I'm convinced it was a huge contributing factor to my anorexia diagnosis. Lots of emotional turmoil but I wasn't taught how to talk about emotions, wasn't even really exposed to emotions, and no one to talk with about them anyway. Only way I could signal to the outside world I was not OK was starving myself, I guess. I'm ok now. Hope you are also ok."
Soggy_Biscuit_
Crazy Woman
"My cousin who is absolutely crazy. Got an abortion because she hated the guy, got married to him a few months later and started a family (they have 3 kids who are demons)… they moved out of state but she started coming back home once every few months to drop off the kids at her parents and then go on a bender and basically live in a motel for a few days."
"Then the divorce came, she married one of the guys she was banging on the side, got divorced again after cheating on him with husband number 1… now she’s dating her drug dealer. Again she still has custody of her 3 kids."
Old-Air1062
Whoops...
"I was a complete accident. They found out at the wedding and I’m pretty sure my Christian grandparents weren’t happy. They’ve only talked about it a few times."
AHorrorFreak
Some secrets are meant to stay in the family and meant to go to the grave.
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For the most part, survival tips have been taught to us from a young age. We know to call 911 if there's an emergency and to put pressure on a bleeding wound. Boy Scouts know to be always prepared. Hikers know to conserve water, campers know how to build a fire, and anyone who spends a great deal of time outdoors knows how to locate shelter.
However, those skills are pretty basic. If you get into real trouble, you'll need more specific survival skills in order to get yourself out of trouble.
Some people can give you survival tips that can mean the difference between life and death. Others may give you tips that seem to make sense, but will probably only lead to death. It can be a great skill to learn the difference.
That's probably the thought process that led Redditor scarredforlife164 to ask:
"What "survival tips" would probably get you killed?"
Not All Meat Is Safe To Eat
"Saw this on a survival show:
“If you find a dead animal and it’s fairly fresh (flies haven’t set in) its relatively safe to eat because a. It’s fresh b. Nothing has had a chance to spread disease to it by eating.”
"Problem is that if you can’t see a visible reason for death, it’s probably disease that killed the damn thing and you’re about to eat it."
"A girl on Naked and Afraid 40 days quoted the survivalist that said this shortly after finding a bird on the ground of the jungle she was in. The bird was fresh, still warm, flexible etc, just dead."
"She ended up contracting avian tuberculosis, which is apparently really hard to do if you’re not a bird"
– Apprehensive_Oven924
"This is why my parents always told me to not even touch dead animals (exemption: our pets, but we knew why they died). I can't believe that anyone would just eat some random dead animal."
– Nico_MyTrueSelf
The Shock Won't Save You
"Had a coworker try and tell me once the best way to disarm a guy pointing a handgun at your face was to quickly slap his hand holding the pistol because it would "shock him into dropping it". I've never tested the theory but I'm willing to bet any shock would just as likely cause that trigger finger to clench as well."
– ArchaeoFox
The Importance of Water
"Conserving all of your water. If you’re thirsty, drink!"
– getyourcheftogether
"Not drinking your water when lost and thirsty because you're almost out of water. There are lots of people found with water left who were fully dehydrated but to scared to run out of water"
– Logitoh
Don't Let Him Catch Up To You!
"run in a zig zag away from crocodiles, it just tires you out"
– No_Government_3604
Never Arm You Opponent
"Throwing knives were a thing when I was in the Army. If you have a knife and your opponent does not, don’t give it to him or her."
–Grillparzer47
"The enemy cannot push a button...if you disable his hand."
– hardspank916
Report It Right Away
"that you have to wait a certain amount of time before reporting someone missing. no, the second someone is missing, report it"
– karleyh6
No Bear Is One Color
"If its black fight back, if its brown lay down. Brown bears can be black and black bears can be brown"
– random_person4444
Run, Run As Fast As You Can
"Any “learn to fight in a weekend” martial arts tips. Step one: run like a mother f*cker."
– dewayneestes
Don't Drink Cactus Juice
"DO NOT DRINK WATER FROM A CATUS WHEN YOU’RE THIRSTY IN THE DESERT. IT IS PROBABLY GOING TO KILL YOU BEFORE DEHYDRATION DOES."
– Consistent_Leopard77
Tornado Tips
"DO NOT lay in a roadside ditch or hide under a bridge during a tornado."
"There's a good chance the tornado will flip your car on top of you in the ditch."
"Under the bridge will turn into a wind tunnel, accelerating the debris that will rip your body to shreds."
– tyleristheman02
Did you learn something? I certainly didn't know black bears could be brown and brown bears could be black. Of course, I prefer not to need to know anything about bears at all!
Survival tips are certainly important to know. Just make sure whatever tips you get are from a reputable source.
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There are certain things you should not be skimpy about when it comes time to buy them. For example: toiletries. Why in the world would you want to use somebody else's toothbrush? A used toothbrush, we should underscore.
You'd run away screaming if you saw a used one sitting on a shelf at Goodwill, wouldn't you? Of course you would. You would immediately go to the pharmacy and pick up a brand new one, like a smart person.
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor Idkewokorsomthing asked the online community:
"What is the one thing you should always buy new?"
"Once it's been in an accident..."
"Bike helmets. Once it’s been in an accident or even just dropped, the foam is compressed and won’t protect you as much."
beetlereads
This is very true! Do not ever use a helmet that's already sustained an accident. It could be as bad as not wearing one at all.
"Fire chief in my town once said a ladder truck. He wouldn’t ask anyone to climb a used ladder. A used tanker or ambulance maybe."
Ok-cantaloupe7160
Don't those things have maintenance and inspection protocols in place? I would certainly hope so.
"Hard drives and flash memory..."
"Any sort of computer storage."
"Hard drives and flash memory used in solid state drives and flash drives wears down over time. The more you read and write to it, the more it wears down. If you buy used, you don't know what that storage was used for, how often, or how heavily. It could last you years to come or die the next day."
Batcastle3
Considering the lifetime of SSDs, it's kinda okay. There is almost no way to break one, and the cell life time is good, and controllers help protecting them from wear leveling.
For HDDs though, buying used drives is a bad idea.
"It's one thing..."
"Fabric furniture. It’s one thing to by your friends couch, but you have no idea what was going on with that sofa sitting in goodwill."
PMme
Bedbugs are terrifying. Trust me, you never want to deal with them.
"Though really..."
"Wicker furniture. Though really, you shouldn't buy that type of furniture at all. It's the perfect nesting space for bugs."
[deleted]
See?! What did I tell you?! Don't do it!
"You can't use them..."
"Oh, and baby car seats. You can't use them after a car accident and buying secondhand means you can't always verify that it hasn't been in one."
[deleted]
I would certainly hope that people aren't still using them after accidents. That's just asking for trouble.
"Once they've been..."
"Shoes, especially for kids. Once they've been worn in to conform with someone else's foot, you don't want your kids putting their growing feet in there to get reshaped."
i_know_tofu
Also... gross. Just gross.
Get your kids feet measured regularly and listen to your kids if they tell you that their shoes are too tight of they hurt.
"They're expensive..."
"Children's car seats. They're expensive but there's no guarantee what condition they are in second hand, particularly if they've been through an accident already."
[deleted]
Parents, take note! You'll definitely thank yourselves later.
"Climbing rope. You can't tell how many falls its had or how old it is, and it's literally your life line when you're rock climbing."
JudeoCrustacean
Very important! People die in climbing accidents each year – don't be one of them.
"It's actually not healthy..."
"Shoes. It’s actually not healthy to walk in some other person's shoes. It has an impact on your whole body and can cause severe different pains in your body."
pulpriot
You don't want to have issues with your feet in later life! Again, you'll be thankful you listened to this advice.
Some other things I'd add off the top of my head: Mattresses, power supplies, oh, and... this should go without saying, but underwear,
Yes, underwear. The human race pains me.
Have some recommendations of your own? Tell us more in the comments below!
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I've got a decent amount of animals - some fish, turtles, dogs, etc. - but out of all of them, Optimus Prime is definitely *my* pet.
He's kind of a jerk to everyone else, but a with me he's a the biggest bestest beefaroni boy.
That is an outright lie, this dog is awfully behaved and taught himself how to open doors so he stays letting mosquitos in the house and air conditioning all of South Florida instead of just my living room. I just have a soft spot for him.
But here's the thing - soft spot or not, if someone offered me $50k for this dog, my reaction wouldn't be horror because I just love my "shmoopies" and even can't imagine. I'm not that privileged.
I grew up poor, believe me I've imagined $50k a lot. "Shmoops" might get voted off the island when $50k keeps your babies safe and housed. Relax, animal lovers. Optimus Prime is in no danger of going anywhere.
Nobody is tryna pay $50k to be headbutted and farted at all day.
That fact is precisely why my reaction to someone offering me cash for him would be straight up suspicion.
Optimus is a big beautiful male pit bull with so much muscle that he has abs on his butt.
He doesn't have any official papers, and he's fixed so he can't be used for breeding.
He's not a therapy dog and doesn't do any special tricks (on purpose) and in the time it took me to write this intro he farted so loudly that he scared himself awake and then got so excited by the sudden wake up that he did 3 bunny bounces. It's clear this would not be a high-skilled-labor kind of hire, ya know?
So why would someone want to spend that much money on this dog specifically?
Hmm?
I'd be suspicious that anyone willing to drop serious money on him was going to try to use his size and strength in dog fights and THAT is not gonna fly with me. Not a chance.
The person offering would have to convince me that they're willing to spend that much money on a giant dumb pit bull for some non-fighting reason and that he would have a dope life. Maybe I'd say yes because they sincerely believe he's the reincarnated spirit of their college bro who died in a horrific skiing accident, and they need to take him on a cross country road trip to fulfill the last thing on their bromantic bucket list?
Maybe.
Reddit user spondgbob asked:
"If someone offered you $50,000 to buy your pet, how would you respond?"
Here's what Reddit has to say.
Outside
"I'd tell them to meet me outside the local PetSmart in an hour and then rush there and buy a hamster or something."
"Kind of my only option since I don't have a pet."
- eleven_eighteen
"You sir, are playing 3D chess while the rest of us are all playing checkers."
- StillAll
Irrational Love
"Great question."
"Made me think for a second because my immediate answer is no but upon thinking about it, and how badly I need the money, the answer is still no."
"Irrational love is crazy."
- To_Fight_The_Night
"Same."
"I could desperately use that money and there's nothing special about my cats. Took a moment to realize it's completely irrational but I could never part with these idiots."
"The harder question after this is at what price point, if any, would you do it?"
- joyfall
Everything Has A Price
"Everything has a price, and they’re in luck that the price for my blind, deaf, arthritic dog happens to be $50k"
- DoctorDblYou
"I mean $50k is $50k."
- MinnesotaMiller
"Like I get that some people view pets as family, good for them. I don't, so as long as they weren't gonna torture the animal or something, then 100% would do it."
- avelak
Poo Problems
" 'You may have the one that runs from it's own poo after it sh*ts' "
- Blastin-Ass
"Had a cat get spooked while sh*tting... when it finished he managed to nuke 4 rooms :( "
- tuffymon
"I call what my dog does a 'poop-about.' "
"Like a walk-about, but she is pooping as she waddles around the yard sniffing rocks and stuff. She's a weird critter and I love her more than anything."
- cycloptopussy
"One of my earliest memory is having a blast farting in the bathtub... and then..."
"Don't make fun of your pet, your own poop can be very scary and we deserve love no less than more courageous creatures."
- RaccoonyDave·
Bye
"Give it to them."
"I love my aquarium and fish in it. But I could build a sweet aquarium set up with $50k."
- Inner-Nothing7779
"Exactly! I wouldn't sell my dog but I'd give my aquariums away for 50k."
"One of them is a custom that a built a background for and I'd still give it away for 50k."
- RPC3
"Yeah, I would sell my cat in a heartbeat. Call me a narcissist I guess."
"Good thing I dont have kids."
- Maggy_Monster
$100k
"I'll take the $100,000 in cash."
"50k to give him to you and another 50k to take him back tomorrow when you've finally reached your limit and can't keep him anymore."
"My dog has his own spirit animal, and that spirit animal is a bag of dicks."
"My dog has separation anxiety and a powerful set of lungs."
"I have to drop him off at my mom's house on the way to work so he can be with someone familiar or else he'll be howling all day. He sounds like a dying bison."
"I'm talking loud enough to hear inside your house half a block away. While he's *inside* my house!"
- Tobias_Atwood
Medical Needs
"I'd sell."
"My kitty is old at this point and I worry now. Someone willing to pay $50k for her probably has the money to take care of medical needs that will be coming soon. That's money I dont have."
"I love her, she has been my family for 17 years now, but if she gets sick reality is I'm gonna have to get her put down probably. She'd have a better chance with someone rich to spoil her at the end."
- BlueClouds42
Sick Sh*t
"I'm shocked by everyone saying they'd do it?!"
"If someone is willing to pay that much, just imagine the sick sh*t they are planning on doing. No way I could live with myself."
"Would you sell your kid? You can get a lot more than 50k for one of them..."
"I have a hard time believing someone willing to sell a dog for a 'lot of money' wouldn't be tempted to or actually sell a child."
"It's alooooot of money for children, so if money is the motivator...."
- Pepperclue_55
Little Napoleon
"Couldn't sell."
"My a$$hole cat is a jerk, but family. Though I would expect a lot of push to sell him since he is mean to everyone with only rare moments of niceness."
"Plus they whoever got him would likely kill him."
"He is allergic to fish, can't wear a collar even a breakaway one (somehow almost strangled himself twice), sits in the middle of the road if he escapes, eats the random stuff on the ground, randomly attacks people (full on claws, teeth- goes for the veins usually breaks skin and causes a bruise), has diseases, and goes after other animals in the house regardless of size."
"I hate it and get mad at my boyfriend every time he says it, but he jokes that natural selection is trying its best with my cat. He's kind of right."
"He is untrainable and awful, but incredibly cute and everyone wants to pet him (but quickly learn not to go near him.) At least he does not attack kids 5 and under though."
"I wanted to name him lil Napoleon as he is perpetually ready for a battle and a short legged munchkin. I took him in from my sister but couldn't change his name so it became my nickname for him."
- Wolfling
Get Over It
"It is a beta fish that we have had for six days. The kids are currently celebrating it still being alive because they accidentally killed our first fish in about six hours."
"Suffice to say, I’m pretty sure we can get them over it."
"Yes please on the $50,000."
- NurmGurpler
Time to be honest with yourself—would you do it?
What would your reaction be?
Let's argue in the comments!
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