Nobody wants to die alone. Though we may not admit it, we've all thought about having a love story that lasts until the end of time. Sometimes many of us don't get that lucky. So we start to peruse our sea of possibilities in those nearest and dearest or those acquaintances that are a looker. Forging a pact so that you have guaranteed company later in life isn't a terrible idea.
Redditor u/devilsdickpic wanted to hear from all the marrieds out there who are willing to share about their love story by asking.... Who here has actually married their "Let's get married if we're still single by 40" person, and what's the story?
Life is weird.
Our agreement was if we were both single in 2000. I kinda had a crush on him anyway. He found a lovely girlfriend, they got married. I was invited to the wedding and was kinda heartbroken.
He had two kids with his wife. I later found my husband (and I wouldn't trade him for the world!). Now my pact-mate is divorced from wife and dating one of my best friends from our college friend group.
Life is weird. part_house_part_dog
I Like the Idea....
Not married, yet. I knew he had a crush on me for a while, but I wanted to be on my own for a few years. I didn't believe in love at the time and was against it due to childhood trauma.
Drunkenly told him one day that we should get married if we were still single by 35, and he said he was down. After a while, I realized that he was the one that was always there for me/did right by me/showed up/would leave food and giant bouquets of my favorite flowers on my doorstep/icky romantic stuff/etc. I could go on.
There was no doubt in my mind then that he would treat me right. One day, I decided to spend the night and I haven't slept a single night without him since (except for work trips).
I've become immune to his loud, incessant farting, we've gone full weird on each other, we finish each other's sentences, and we can't wait to pop some babies out. This man was not only friend-zoned, he was bro-zoned. Now, I want 10 of his babies and can't imagine my life without him. This thread helped remind me I could've missed out on something great like this had I not given it a chance. Vyxs
+3
GiphyMy senior year of high school I made a deal like that with a friend of mine. If we were single by 30 we would get married. Well we ended up getting married 3 years later. Schwabyboi
Renewals.
Made a deal with one of my long time friends that I dated in middle school. I moved, and we kept in touch periodically. While I was in college, we "renewed" the deal, but then I was in a long term relationship, and she eventually got into one as well. However, as mine ended, tragically, her BF of 3 years took his life. It really messed her up, as she was the one who found him afterwards.
Our friendship never really was the same, and she hasn't dated anyone since; only hookups but refuses to settle down or try dating again. Our "renewal" ended this past fall, and I tried seeing if she wanted to meet up since it had been over a decade since we last saw one another. But just seems we've drifted too far apart. Dezimieren
Festival Love.
My aunt! She met a friend a long time ago at a festival and always said i'm never going to marry someone and he thought the same so they said if we ever meet again. Years later they both saw each other at the same festival again and now they're married for a little over a year :). anonymousdutchperson
So Close....
GiphyMy best friend in high school and I had this. Everyone thought we were joking (both girls) but I think we were pretty serious. We are still best friends and both in very fulfilling relationships with men who understand how close we are and honestly I'd love to live in a giant house with all 4 of us forever. Might not actually be married but it's pretty damn close. catdoc417
Sad Ending.
We dated in high school but kept in touch. But we lived in different states and she kept a lot of secrets about how bad things were going in her life. She passed away from drug abuse last year. I'm 37.
I don't know if I should feel like I dodged a bullet or feel like I failed her as a friend. JDK002
Marcus. I miss you.
My person ghosted me a few years ago (I just turned 36 today).
We were enemies in elementary school, frenemies in middle school, then friends who dated very briefly in high school. Continued to talk and catch up with one another in our twenties... then nothing. I can't even find him on social media anymore.
To disappear so completely after all of these years worries me: is he in jail? Dead? I'm not looking for him out of some fear that I did something wrong to offend him to make him want to cut me out of his life, I just miss our friendship... and if something has occurred (positive or negative) that motivated him to move on without me in his life, I would like to know. I still look around the internet for him very so often, Catfish-style, just in case I do ever find him again so I know that he's alright.
I hope you see this someday, Marcus. I miss you. stephlovaaaa
Back Again....
GiphyWoman I met in high school and dated off and on agreed to get married to each other if we were still single at 30 years old. When we were both 29 we got engaged to other people. We've always been friends and kept in touch so my fiancee and I went to her wedding and she went to mine. We'd run into each other from time-to-time and our kids attended the same school.
Fast forward 20 years and I run into her at a coffee shop. I ask her how her husband is doing and she said they've been separated for a while. She asks me how my wife is and I tell her we've been separated for a while. We are now dating and have been for close to a year. She's a wonderful person and we both feel very fortunate to be with each other. yert1099
Fingers Crossed.
This is kinda blowing my mind, because I didn't think this truly existed. I have a friend who says when we're 36, if we're not married, we will be... I used to have a crush on her when I was 16 (now 27) so we'll see!!! Hahaha, ill update in 10 years.
Edit: I have a girlfriend, but I'm shocked that this actually happens and plays out among other people. LordNesak
Thanks Facebook....
GiphyI did. But the age was 30. Friends through high school and went to college apart. Using IM one night (yes almost 20 years ago), we were chatting. She'd just had a bad break up and I was striking out. I said let's get married if we're single at thirty.
She posted on Facebook that she's single one week after her birthday. My birthday was a week later and I sent, "Gee, we're supposed to get married soon. We better go in a date." Married seven years and one kid so far. Kdj2j2
Fast forward 20 years....
I may be a little late to this party.... but, my wife and I went to high school together and never dated. We were movie buddies and I had a little crush on her, we did make out one time at a party. I was a year ahead of her, and right before I graduated we made a pact to marry each other if we were single in the distant future, can't remember what that date was, but... Fast forward 20 years.
We reconnected on social media and 2 years later we were married. About 5 years later we were going through some boxes and I found a "cheesecake" photo of her from 1987 with a note written on the back saying how she can't wait until our wedding day. We had both forgotten about the pact until we found the picture, Then about six months ago, my parents cleaned out their attic and gave me a box full of stuff they saved.
Inside was a note from my ex in high school and in the ramblings of teenage angst she mentioned that she had a vision of "my now wife" and I together. Odd for an ex to say but we had a good laugh about that. Tomorrow is our 12th anniversary. Thanks for letting us walk down memory lane for our anniversary. shadattack
Me!!!!!!!!
Me! We agreed on 30 though. We had dated in high school and into college for 4 years. Life just kind of made us go separate ways (like, countries apart). Would occasionally keep in touch throughout our early 20s. Both of us went through multiple bad relationships and made a joke that if we were both single by 30, we would get married.
He came home for Easter one year and asked me to go on a date for old times sake. We made it about five minutes into the date before we remembered how much we were missing out on with each other and what we had had. Got married the following year!
Now we're 5 years in with a 3 y/o and sitting on the couch, each of us on Reddit, and debated who should post this story.
Edit: Thanks for quadrupling my karma, guys! 😁 mkgordo
Love to Her....
Opposite happened to me. Made a pact with a girl I had been friends with for several years. We were both awkward and I felt a good pair, of friends at the very least.
I brought it up, she agreed. Went out and found a husband about 6 months later. I was happy for her, but sad for me. After that she stopped taking to me and I haven't spoken to her in 20 years.
I hope she's still doing well. thewurstunicorn
The Grands....
GiphyMy Grandma had jokingly said she'd ask some guy she knew to marry her the next leap year if they were all single. When it became apparent that he was expecting this to happen she asked my Grandpa to marry her instead. Sugarnspice44
Almost a Decade In....
I did! The age was 35 and we kept bumping down the age to 27. It took us a long time before we got the courage to tell each other that we wanted more than being friends. We were so afraid of the other one not feeling the same way, but life has worked out better than I imagined. We celebrate 9 years together next month. SendWine
Only for Love.
GiphyA friend made this proposition to me several years ago. I said, "No, even if I'm still alone I will only marry for love." About a decade later we got married. Things are good and we didn't even have to wait until we turned 40. shorthomology
across the country....
I had this agreement with a good friend who lived across the country (be each other's fall back plan when I turned 30). Whenever we were both single, we would be on the phone basically all day. However, when one or both of us was dating someone we would fall out of close contact. This went on for a few years.
After a bad breakup for me, he said that he was coming to my part of the country for Christmas to visit family and that maybe we should not date other people between now (September) and then. After that, there was no question of not being together even before he actually arrived at Christmas. That was almost 15 years ago. This year is our tenth wedding anniversary and we have two boys. sblade77
A ton of Caring....
I have family friends who did that. Two couples who knew each other since college and always stayed close, emotionally and geographically. They made a pact that they would always take care of each other. When one husband and the other's wife died within a year of each other in their early 70's, the two remaining spouses moved in together. Not a romantic situation, just a caring one. Taney34
Let's do 30!!
GiphyYup. 30 was our agreement, but we found ourselves both single in our 20s and thought, what the heck, let's give it a shot. Dated for nearly 5 years, and we're about to celebrate our 13th anniversary of marriage. UsernameObscured
- People Break Down The Things We Should Enjoy Before They're Gone - George Takei ›
- Married Couples Explain What They Wish Single Folks Knew About Relationships - George Takei ›
- Daters Reactions To A Partner Who Wants To Wait Until Marriage - George Takei ›
- People share stories of weddings. gone terribly wrong. - George Takei ›
- People Who Married Their 'Better Than Nothing' Partner Describe How It's Going - George Takei ›
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.