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People Break Down The Absolute Truths No One Wants To Hear

Listen ... we know you don't want to hear it, but 2020 being over won't actually change anything. 2021 is going to start out at least as gnarly as 2020 has been, and whether that gets better or not is probably going to involve some long and exhausting fights.

The flaming dumpster fire we are all in is probably not going to go away any time soon.

One Reddit user asked:

What is an absolute truth that no one wants to hear?

We're not gonna lie. A lot of the stuff in here is a total buzz-kill, however honest it may be. Yes, we can learn from it all - but it's totally normal to be kind of bummed out about it all first.

Proceed with caution if you're in a position where the wind might be easily sucked out of your sails.

Preaching To The Choir

artie abrams choir GIFGiphy

At least pertaining to Reddit where US politics are concerned...

We are not a good representation of the voting population in the United States. Mainstream Reddit and the Twitterverse are but a small part of actual voters. Regardless of how overwhelmingly in support of a candidate we all might be, it's not a good indicator of how much support someone (like Joe Biden or Bernie Sanders) actually have.

Less a fact and more my opinion now: I think Reddit tends to do their political activism on Reddit only, to where they receive overwhelming support...from other Reddit users. It does nothing for their actual community or spreading a message, while still giving them the satisfaction of having made an impact. I think it's important to remember not to get complacent just because a bunch of Reddit/Twitter users support your views and your candidate. We are a very small potion of a much larger population, and we tend to do too much preaching to the choir, so to speak.

- WonderWeasel91

Mistakes Were Made

"It is possible to make no mistakes and still lose. That is not failure that is life." -Captain Jean Luc Picard

- SherriffBartholomew

Conversely, it is possible to make many, many mistakes and come out ahead and people forget that.

They think taking a real risk is out of the question because of past "mistakes." And they feel like they cannot afford more mistakes. Like it's been too long, they haven't done enough, etc. And they don't push through and then they're staring at a wall at 29 going "holy s**t, I thought it was too late when I was 20. Now I'm 29 and it's definitely too late." But then you're 52 going "man my 29 year old self should have made some more mistakes, they could have handled it." Etc. I'm not 52 but I read and interact a lot with people older than me.

Anyway all this is to say mistakes are neutral markers of what works and what doesn't. Doesn't work, fix it. Works, improve it or keep it the same.

So take a risk, life's a gamble. Buy the ticket, take the ride, all that jazz.

- MarshOccupation


Just because you love someone it doesn't mean they will love you back. No matter how hard you try to get them to, they just won't.

- hei_fei

You can't love someone into loving you. Gotta keep telling myself that one.

- marajadefan

I broke up with my boyfriend 4 months ago because I no longer had feelings for him. He's still not over it and has been acting like a psychopath. I think I made the right decision. You can't force someone to have feelings for you by harassing them and their friends.

- _Dixie-Normous_

You know what's an even harder realization, even if you both love each other, it doesn't mean you can make a relationship work.

- Problem11v-0800

You'll Be Forgotten

After a generation or two after your death, no one alive will have any memories of you. Your life, everything you did, and all of your struggles and achievements will all be forgotten. You'll just be another one of the billions of forgotten souls whose names, faces, and life stories have all been lost to time.

- Vinny_Lam

Strangely uplifting, reminds me that I don't have to do jacksh!t to impress people - among other things

- erectusmaximuscon

Remember all that time before you were born? And how people didn't know you were going to exist? It was just nothingness. Not good or bad, happy or sad. That's what it will be like generations after you pass.

- Zachsyd

Easy As Pie

Life is easier for attractive people.

- BobSacramanto

I once went on vacation with one of my very attractive friends. I was absolutely floored at the amount of people that just went out of their way to help us, give us free stuff etc. But I also noticed if someone ever told her no she would lose her sh!t. She just wasn't used to it.

- true-romance

When I was thin, I never noticed it. Then some stuff happened and I gained a bunch of weight. I was stuck in my house during the period I gained weight so it was just a total 180 when I was able to go out again. I'm no morbidly obese or anything and no one is mean to me, but people just aren't as nice as they used to be.

I never realized it until it was gone.

Attractive people just don't realize the benefits of being attractive. People just gravitate to you more, it's easier to make friends (of both sexes), it's easier to connect with people and you're given more opportunities as a result.

It's not even about sexual attraction (though it can be) but people just naturally gravitate to you more.

I never realized how much that was true until it went away.

- Twentytwoeightyeight

I noticed this going the other way. Even as a guy (where theoretically it seems to matter less), I noticed more positive attention and agreeableness from most everyone than I had before. It's not that they were rude or dismissive before or anything. It's that I got glossed over and ignored more frequently.

The most uncomfortable part is, after noticing this change in behavior, I realized I've always been guilty of it too. I'm not mean to less attractive or heavier people, but I do focus on them less when I'm not actively engaged in conversation with them.

It's weird. And subtle.

- TheBertinator3000

Exact same thing happened to me. I'd been overweight to mildly obese all my life. Then, about 10 years ago I dropped a lot of weight and discovered exercise. Without false modesty, I look quite ok now. I really notice how people are just so much nicer to me.

It used to be that people either try to ignore me, or show strained smiles because they have to. Now I get attention, people flirt with me and do not get annoyed when I ask them to do something for me. I honestly did not expect how different people would treat you.

And just like you, I only became aware that I do this too when it happened to me.

- saugoof

Nobody Else Cares That Much


Your spouse/child/home/job/vacation, etc. is not nearly as important to anyone else as it is to you.

- tappytaps

Yeah I have a friend who goes on and on about his daughter.

I really don't care and it's boring, but he enjoys talking about her so much and I'm happy to see a father so consistently excited about his kid. So, ya have to listen and seem interested - I'm sure people give me the same kindness about a few things too.

- catshtdogfart

The deeper cut on this is that that's okay. You're supposed to care deeply about the things in your own life, and other people not caring about them doesn't make them less important.

This is one of the things Instagram culture has taken away from us -- the idea that you're doing great even if nobody likes the photos of the breakfast you made or knows who you are.

For most of human history, most of our emphasis and energy was spent on our families and immediate communities. Now we're all flailing to "matter" to a bunch of strangers we probably wouldn't like in person and it's wrecking our brains.

- ambivalenttypewriter

Family Tree

Just because someone is related to you doesn't mean they are a good person.

- ohnomyglasseye

Also, to add to this, just because someone is related to you, doesn't mean you have to like or tolerate them. Sometimes for people, friends are your true family because they accept you for who you are. They choose to stick around with you. Not because they have to.

I don't speak to my abusive father and never will again, nor his side of the family. I'm estranged from one of my sisters already and I don't like most of my extended family. I do not appreciate their morals.

You won't lose much at all by cutting some family ties (circumstances depend though, ofc). You'll be much happier in the long run once you establish your life, who you are and what you need/want for your future.

- danyatma

Just Cuz

No matter how nice you are, some people will be a$$holes to you just cuz.

- abeast0333

As an avid people pleaser that takes it very personally when people don't like me, I have to remember this!

- BoobCobbler

Working in retail is going to be the death of me. People can be such unbelievable a$holes. Just because you're having a bad day/life doesn't mean you can take it out on the girl working in the store you're buying flowers from! And it's always the elderly that are the meanest, in my experience. I'm so glad for masks because I don't have to fake smile anymore.

- dinosaurfluff_


You need to have your views challenged. Being around and positively engaging with people who disagree with you is one of the healthiest intellectual practices we can do.

- Big-Muff-Pie

Okay, but I hold my views for a reason. I'm not interested in being "challenged" on whether LGBTQ people deserve respect or whether poor people should be left to die by society or whether it's okay to lock people in cages away from their families because they wanted a better life. I'm just f*ckin' not interested.

And that's what people mean when they talk about "having your views challenged" or "a fair and balanced discussion" - they mean giving equal weight to cruel, bigoted, or outright nonsensical ideas. You can miss me with that sh!t.

- NikkoJT

So long as that engagement is in good faith. Don't waste your time or emotional health engaging with a bad faith arguer

- Prudent_Am0eba

My beloved late boss was a man with many businesses and a large staff. I was fairly new and told him in a meeting that his latest idea wouldn't work and why I thought so. You could have heard a pin drop in that room! I was later informed by others not to do that, ever. He and I started working closer together and I was always honest with him when I thought he was wrong. I always told him he had enough yes men. Needless to say as the years went on he sold off most of his holdings and I was his one lone employee until the end. He always told me that he needed someone to challenge him and give him a different view. He was a wise man and a wonderful mentor and I will always be grateful for the knowledge I got from him. Even smart people need to be challenged sometimes.

- Justlookinaround20

You're In Your Own Way

You are probably the cause of your own problems because you refuse to look within yourself and deal with it.

(To be explicit, some people do have a variety of problems that are imposed upon them for a variety of reasons. But that still doesn't mean responding in such a way that it exacerbates everything.)

- Hynjia

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People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley


"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt


"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."


"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."


Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."


"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip


"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User


– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"


Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."



"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."


Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."



The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."


This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.



"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."



"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”



"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"


"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"


The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."


Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."


Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.


"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.