People Reveal What Made Them Throw In The Towel On Their Relationship
Relationships end for all sorts of reasons - infidelity, selfishness, or people simply stop getting along. There's usually a 'last straw' moment, and it sticks with you.
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
If "oh God now what" is your reaction to their call, it's time to end it.
When I saw their name pop up on my phone, and my immediate reaction was dread rather than excitement.
It's one thing to occasionally feel that a friend is being needy, it's another when literally every communication leads to you wondering, "oh, god, what is it this time?"
Takes a lot to recognize this.
When I realized I didn't like myself when I'm with them.
No one wants to be a friend out of convenience.
When I realized our friendship was at her convenience and if she didn't need emotional support she would prefer I didn't exist. I'm willing to bet good money that she hasn't thought about me once since we stopped talking, despite her constant claims of how "important" I was. I've learned some seriously important lessons about people from it all, though, so I guess it isn't all bad.
Friends don't project insecurity onto their friends.
I'm a lil chunky and have a friend that is also a lil chunky. I don't really care, but she is obviously a little bit bigger than me. Weird thing is, she insists constantly she is 30-50 pounds lighter than me, says she's half my pants size, etc. It's weird but I chalk it up to insecurity.
She would always make these weird, cloaked insults about my weight. Once I was talking about how I was shopping at forever 21 in the plus size section. A few minutes later, I complimented her skirt and she said "perks of being able to shop outside of the plus size section!"
It wasn't veiled enough for me anymore and I decided not to be friends with someone that used their insecurity as an excuse to be mean to me anymore.
When I went to text him a happy birthday and saw that the last communication between us was me texting him happy birthday a year ago
If you're starting to tear each other down, it's probably time to part ways.
I had a realization that even though there was nothing wrong with the relationship, there wasn't all that much right with it either. There was nothing that excited me. It was just a sort of low-level dissatisfaction with each other that was only getting worse, but never quickly enough to be able to point to an individual moment where we could justify sitting down and having The Talk. We just sort of assumed we were happy because we were happy once, and things hadn't really changed, so... stability, I guess? Yay?
Eventually, it just goes to the stage where we were picking each other apart grain by grain, so I sat him down and explained that we were better off apart. He didn't agree. It was a rough conversation, but it worked out for the best; shortly afterward he found someone that he was genuinely excited to be with, and they're still doing great.
The realization that just because he was a good person, it didn't mean he was a good person for me was a big turning point.
My biggest fear.
When I realized that while I considered us good friends, I was just being tolerated.
Being abandoned by friends can be devastating.
I have this group chat with my friends from high school and we talk every day in it. I've asked multiple times to hang out but they've been busy or no one replies. I tried to be optimistic and give them the benefit of the doubt, but for the past 2 months I've seen a majority of them hanging out on Snapchat stories and I've never been invited once. The last straw was me asking in advance if anyone wanted to go out to dinner and ice cream for my birthday and that I would pay for everyone. I know people saw it because it tells me, but no one said anything. So that's the story of how I spent my birthday alone this year.
I had a friend who was supposed to be the best man at my wedding but texted me the day of the rehearsal that he wasn't going to make it.
But it didn't end there. Some years later he put out a FB invitation to a BBQ at a park, this turned out to be his own wedding, which was a surprise. The following day he texted me "Guess we're even on missing each other's weddings now."
I told him to lose my phone number at that point.
The friend zone can get old.
When I had the moment of realization that I became the typical nice guy trope towards a friend. I realized it was unhealthy for me and wasn't fair to her, so I pulled away to work on bettering myself & not drag her down.
This is... crazy. I'd take revenge too.
In my late 20s, I got rid of a poisonous social group of people where a few members were harassing me with "pranks" like stealing my mail, slashing my tires, harassing my work, and just generally being aholes while pretending to be my friends. I was in denial for a while, thinking "these are not how adults act," and it was a string of coincidences until a few other members came to me with evidence and "Uh, I think you should know..."
I never knew why they did it. The gist I got, and it's piecemeal based on some of the legal stuff I had access to, but it started out as "harmless pranks" that just got out of hand. One of them said in a confession to avoid prosecution, "we just couldn't stand to see him succeed. We loved doing s* to him, and then him ranting about it online. It was hilarious, we never knew that [other people] were going so far as to do [illegal stuff]." He blamed it on mob mentality.
Sadly, they went too far with the work thing, and my work went after them legally in a big way: two lost their security clearance, one was suspended from her job without pay, and another lost his entire business (which was operating illegally, but still). The rest just allowed it to happen or decided it was none of their business. It was only then I found out how a lot of these seemingly unrelated events were all planned out.
It just seems so surreal.
Cruelty to animals is an ABSOLUTE dealbreaker.
I ended a friendship because whenever we would spend time together she just wanted to talk about all the people she disliked (which was A LOT of people) and brag about herself. If I visited her parent's house with her and tried to have a conversation with them she would interfere and say things like, "why would you think anyone wants to hear what you have to say". Her mother had a lot of health issues and didn't get out much and this girl I was friends with thought it made her boring and not worth spending time with.
Also, her boyfriend had a very old cat who was blind and walked very slowly. Whenever it got in her way she would kick it and scream at it.
Recently found out that even her family, who are lovely, have broke contact with her because she has treated them appallingly.
Oh, she is also the kind of person who goes traveling to third world countries to take pictures with the locals for her social media and acts like she's a saint for going there and blessing them with her privileged presence.
Ruining someone's start to college? Goodbye.
My ex-best friend from HS was supposed to be my roommate when we went away to University. We talked about it a lot, so when he and another friend went to that town to find us an apartment, I was pretty excited to hear the news. Upon returning, he said that they found a great place, three bedrooms. I said, well, there are four of us, who are sharing a room? He said, no one, one for me, one for Jay and one for Jason. I said, where is my room? He said, oh, um, I didn't know you wanted to get an apartment together. That was a very fast beginning of the end.
Hey, you ask for a marriage? You pay for the marriage.
When I told him that I didn't have the money for a wedding right now and we needed to push it back a year and he said, "well if we don't have it now, we'll never have it". I suggested we just go to the justice of the peace and he said, "No, I want a real wedding" (He and his family didn't have the money to even help...so he expected me to pay for my own wedding by myself). He had some friends over a few days later and I was having a call with my bridesmaids and I overheard him say, "oh, I stay out of all that stuff...the wedding is for her, ya know." It was the first time that I had ever heard him outright lie to someone about something so trivial and dumb. I broke off the engagement the next day after I told him we need to postpone because I'm not trying to go into debt for a day and he still said, No. He finally confessed that he wanted to get married because he wanted something in his life that was secure. I was like....and what was I going to get? A bag of problems is what. I am so thankful for my wandering ears overhearing that bs.
No, you don't deserve anything if you don't work for it.
When I told him about something exciting that happened in my life (getting into grad school), and instead of being excited for me, he was angry because he felt he deserved it more than I did. Despite never applying for any such program himself, getting sh_tty grades because all he did during college was play video games, and having no career ambitions to speak of.
I dealt with a lot of sh_t from him over the span of 2.5 years, but somehow his resentment of my happiness at that moment was the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back. Broke it off with him not long after.
It costs $0.00 to not be a misogynistic pig.
In college, an old friend of mine came to visit and was really rude to my girlfriend. Like "men are talking" type rude. It was subtle, not in your face or aggressive. Let's call him Joe is the sort of guy that is simultaneously god's gift to women in his own mind but has also never had a relationship of any kind, the least of which is because he is nothing to look at and out of shape. Joe is a broken ego chauvinist.
Post college. I now live with my former girlfriend, current fiancee. Joe wants to come over.
He does it again. Same exact thing. Any time she tries to join the conversation he acts like it's the dumbest thing he's ever heard and brushes it off.
We agreed to have him over that night because I felt bad about having no old friends in our wedding party. I still asked him to be a groomsman. It is one of the biggest failures of judgment I've ever made.
I haven't seen him privately since that night, almost a decade ago. I do not plan to.
Some people just aren't meant to be together.
We were fighting over the dumbest things. Time spent together felt like a chore for both of us. Despite all of it, I love her very much and she's an amazing person. We were friends before lovers, I respected our relationship enough to cut it off. It was turning toxic and it's not my intention for her to hurt, so it was the best for both of us. It hurts sometimes and I regret it but.. yeah.
Sounds like the friend has depression and is taking it out on others.
I've hit this point with a friend recently. He's become extremely negative in the past year or so.
Anything anyone says or does is wrong. I bought a tire pressure gauge and tread depth gauge for my new car and he went off on a rant about how I'm spending my money on 'pointless things.'
I told him that I learned to drive in a diesel car and I'm finding it hard to adjust to a petrol. He went on a rant about how all diesel cars are sh_t and how I need to learn my car better.
I mentioned that I was looking for a new job and he went off about how he would have fired me months ago anyway because of my mental health.
He never used to be like this.
Ummm... I have questions, like, why? Poor kid.
Last Friday when my friend, riding in the passenger seat, wanted me to drop her off at her boyfriend's so she could live there...
While her husband was in the backseat with their child literally crying because he is genuinely scared he will be unable to provide for their baby. Like I had to give him 20 bucks for food because this chick did not care what happened...
The mother did not care as she was heading off to get with her new boyfriend.
Another example of Americans' crusade against education. Aim high, bro.
Had a really good friend for about 15 years. I went to college a little late. We were working together at Wal-Mart for the longest time, and when I announced I was going to be cutting my hours to go to college, he scoffed and accused me of wanting to be "elite."
So, I ended up with a Ph.D., and he's now in his 20th year of being a Wal-Mart floor associate.
There's no shortage of excellent horror fiction out there. Recently I read The Terror by Dan Simmons and can't remember the last time I felt that claustrophobic and nervous. But I am also a fan of quite a few classics. Are there any other horror books that capture grief as effectively as Stephen King's Pet Sematary? What other book evokes folk horror as beautifully as Thomas Tryon's Harvest Home? Let's not forget this wonderful classic: The Haunting of Hill House. I could rave about that one (and Shirley Jackson) for days. All of these books left their mark on me and yes, I'd include them on a list (if I were to make one) of some of the scariest books I've read.
People had their own opinions to share––and books to recommend––after Redditor Tylerisdumber asked the online community,
"What's the scariest book you've ever read?"
"Gerald's Game. I've read lots of Stephen King and this one scared me the most. Slept with the lights on for several nights."
Everything about this book is creepy. Don't even get me started on the... degloving. I'm sorry I even typed that word out.
"It's not a long story..."
"The Yellow Wallpaper.
It's not a long story and I'd highly recommend going in knowing little to nothing about it. It's brilliant and terrifying. Published in 1892 as well if that's any interest!"
Few stories make you feel this sad. A pretty stunning piece of work––and yes, unnerving. Can really get under your skin.
"I think it was mainly..."
"For some reason, Salem's Lot by Stephen King.
I think it was mainly because I was on a week-long hiking trip in the Australian bush and it got dark and scary at night. But damn, I had trouble sleeping for a couple of nights. Then the friend I was hiking with read it, and he couldn't sleep either."
This is probably my favorite early King––and for good reason. The sense of atmosphere is impeccable. Those characters are loveable and you genuinely care about what happens to them. Then the book veers from horror into tragedy. It's quite moving.
"Just the knowledge..."
"On The Beach.
It's the most soul-crushing book I've ever read, and there's really nothing scary in it.
Just the knowledge of impending death for everyone that feels so awfully heavy."
This is one of those books that makes you feel hopeless.
It's impeccably written but wow... it's a truly heavy read.
"You never knew..."
It's a classic. I found it to be immensely chilling. You never knew what would happen and the writing instilled a sort of dread. I read it in the dark before I went to bed until I finished it."
A book I can read and re-read over and over again. It's a beautiful horror novel. It's also a really fascinating window into the era and manages to say a lot about social and class mores.
"I'm Thinking of Ending Things by Iain Reid. Very creepy and unnerving, definitely scared me reading it at night."
I wanted to really like this one––unfortunately, I did not––but there's no denying that the first third or so (especially once the two protagonists get to the house) is pretty unnerving. Shame the payoff wasn't all that.
"It was disturbing and horrifying..."
"Helter Skelter. It's about the Manson murders and goes into quite a bit of detail. It was disturbing and horrifying because, unlike the King novels also mentioned, it's true. What they did to Sharon Tate is so absolutely devastating. Pure evil."
This book is gruesome and not for the faint of heart. The level of detail we dive into learning about the Tate-LaBianca murders is remarkable and also rather nauseating.
"So the book's characters..."
"Bird Box by Josh Malerman.
Forget the Netflix movie. The book's monsters are terrifying, in that you simply just don't know what they are or what they look like. They could be anything. What they are is enough to drive people insane by just being looked at.
So, the book's characters have to navigate a world mostly without one of our most used senses, and what's more terrifying than something you can't see?
This leads to some utterly scary scenes in the book that sent my heart racing and I had to put down for a breather."
It's a shame that movie wasn't all that and a bag of potato chips.
"It's a different kind of scary..."
"It's a different kind of scary, but The Handmaid's Tale. Atwood's dystopian nation feels not that far from reality sometimes, and it absolutely terrifies me."
We're going to go there.
Yes, this book is terrifying.
"I feel like the movie..."
"The Ruins, by Scott Smith, messed me up pretty good. My favorite kind of horror is psychological, and while there is a physical "entity" the real horror is the helplessness of this stranded group trapped by something they don't understand. Their desperate struggle to hold on to their sanity and the slow descent into hopeless desperation just really hit hard.
I feel like the movie was a fairly faithful adaptation, although it's been a while since I've seen it."
I love this book and have read it multiple times over the years. It's slow-going... and then the final one-hundred pages are just horrifying.
Well, if you haven't read any of these... What are you waiting for? Get on that. You won't regret it.
But also... the world is pretty scary right now, so we understand if you need to take a step back.
Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us in the comments below!
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Have you ever traveled to a city you've always heard good things about, only to be totally let down upon arrival?
When a friend insists we travel to certain cities because we would "just love it," they're setting the bar pretty high.
And a city can also boast a rich history or an attraction that makes us curious enough to find out what makes it so appealing.
But, alas, when we finally reach the destination, it's never exactly what we thought it would be.
Curious to hear from strangers online, Redditor tshirtguy2000 asked:
"What city is overrated?"
These are not officially real cities but they do have a rotating population.
It's Always A Party There
"As a former
slave associate at party city. I 100% agree."
"Lego City. There always has to be someone falling into the river."
"Cabot Cove, the murder capital of the world."
"Sure, the murders are all solved, but would you really want to live in a city with that much, easily solved, crime?"
Neighbor To Springfield
Shelbyville. Those f'kers steal trees from neighboring cities.
These were once considered destination cities but their popularity eventually took a nose dive.
"Atlantic City. Venture a few blocks off the boardwalk and it's incredibly depressing. Very clearly an area exploited by the big casinos while the locals have been driven to absolute poverty, while they still force a smile to work the shops that are required for the tourist traffic."
Lots Of Water
"Niagara Falls, Canada. I grew up there. Mayor pumps most of tax $ to casinos and tourism with flashy vegas-esque attractions."
"Myrtle Beach. I'm not even saying that it has a good reputation, I'm just saying that any shred of positive thinking about it makes it overrated."
Where A Creek Is An Exciting Attraction
"Lamb's Grove, Iowa. It's not the paradise on earth that people always say it is. Don't get me wrong, it's got great Chinese food but the motel 6 is meh at best."
Impressions for these cities fell far below expectation.
"Dubai. It's the clickbait of the world. 'We have the biggest/tallest/most expensive YOU WON'T BELIEVE when you see THIS...' It's hot as f*k, everything's a man-made tourist trap; labor exploitation and racism are rampant, and they try so hard to prove to the world how modern and Westernized they are. Really, it's just government propaganda."
"Miami. Horrible place filled with horrible people."
Truth be told, many cities can be overrated.
It just depends on a person's experience, or a resident's perspective about what it is about the location they live in that is nothing worth writing home about.
If I had to choose, I would say Las Vegas is overrated, but that's because there is nothing in Sin City that is of personal interest to me.
I may be severely judged for my opinion, but that is a gamble I'm willing to take.
The opposite sex can be a bit of a mystery sometimes. Our brains work differently just like our bodies and this can lead to certain sensitive questions. Guys tend to be a little less open but today it's time for the ladies to ask away. Even wondered what they really think or feel about their body, yours? Today's the day to get the answers you didn't know you needed.
Redditor William84000 asked:
“Women of reddit, what question do you have of men that you'd really like an answer to?"
His question started an informative thread for women to ask men the questions they've been wondering and receive honest, real-life answers.
“How long does it take to recover if you've been hit in the balls?” Snowy-avocado
“Anywhere from 5 minutes to literally turning to dust like we were Thanos snapped.” secondhand_organsdust whirls GIFGiphy
“The Big Dumb Object...”
“I've always wanted to know: why do you like loud machinery so much? For older men it's mowers, leaf blowers and such. For younger men, it's modified cars and motorbikes. What's the deal with the loud machines?” marshmellow_bunnyx
“Power and tools. Tools are a thing that gets stuff done, and they are loud because they contain the
natural essence power of violent explosions and fire. Most men like powerful things, instead of powerful people.”
“In sci-fi, this is called 'The Big Dumb Object', and is pretty much a trademark of sci fi books written by men” Connect-Zebra7173
To shave or not to shave?
“Does body hair on a woman bother you that much?" reillydean28
“Leg/arm hair? Don't even notice. Armpit hair? Not my thing but not my choice/decision. Pubic hair? I'd prefer not, but it's not going to stop me from getting the job done." wHUT_fun
It’s a power and control thing...
“Why send a d*ck pic?" stavinlawrence
“I think for most men it's a power dynamic thing. Either it gets them off or it just makes them feel in control."
“Then I assume there's the added bonus of if she likes it she might send a nude back. But these losers have a greater chance of buying a "get bigger penis pills" that actually work before a girl appreciates an unsolicited nude." InertialEclipse
"Do you notice the little things?”
“Do you notice the little things about women like a new hair cut, when they wear makeup or a nice outfit?” xforeverlove22
“I can't speak for everyone but for me, nope. Not at all. My uncle had a moustache for like 20 years and one day decided to shave it off. I didn't notice it. I noticed there was a weird atmosphere around me like ‘come on, say something’, so I small talked with him.”
“A few hours later after he left they asked me if I seriously didn't notice that his moustache was gone. My answer was ‘What moustache?‘ And makeup would definitly fly over my head.” PleaseTakeThisName
Lets just not touch people without permission...
“What things have women done that make you uncomfortable?" charloget
“Had a few grab my junk at random. Even had a couple that just forced a kiss on me. I don't usually experience women trying to pick me up, but the few times I did was never great. It was either negging, overly sexually aggressive and always in a group." bahamabanana
On today's episode of sink of float...
“Do penis' float like a buoy? I heard they do but have never been able to verify it.” TheFantasticV
“I mean it's buoyant but it can't really do much besides lazily sorta half float there. Still amused the f**k out of my wife to learn.” secondhand_organsGiphy
Everyone just wants to be loved...
“What makes you feel loved?” linedizzy
“A compliment, a hug or a kiss we don't have to initiate.” Nuitari8
“Do guys care if women get cosmetic procedures done?” dookieconductor
“I don't necessarily care about the work itself, I'd be more concerned about understanding why she felt like she wanted to get it done and help her feel body positive for whatever work has been done or if she feels like she needs work.” -notjosh-
Math will kill a mood everytime...
“What does it feel like when you're having sex and you're trying not to 'get there'? Is it frustrating? What do you do/think about to keep it from happening?" uhohoreolas
“I sometimes do math like 333*3... But often I am fine with just controlling things to focus mostly on her pleasure instead of mine. Tho sometimes she is excited and ends up moving in unaccounted ways while I am a hair away and there is no stopping it. I definitely don't find it frustrating. It is still very enjoyable." Fkire
Some of these Q&A's were unexpected but now we know! This important thing here though is knowing it's ok to ask questions sometimes.
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Everyone's got their own favorite food.
What are two foods that actually taste great together......even though most people don't eat them that way?
Breakfast is the most wonderful meal of the day. As the wise Leslie Knope once said, "Why would anybody ever eat anything besides breakfast food?" So mixing it up can feel blasphemous, but what if it's tasty?
Jam It On
"When I was growing up, it was standard procedure for us to put grape jelly on scrambled eggs. I did it when I went to college and everyone at the table stared at me. I still like it."
"That sounds gross af, but not too gross that I don't still want to try it. Haha"
Bringing People Together
"Peanut butter and maple syrup."
"My husband and I both grew up eating PB and syrup on our waffles. We took that as a sign it was meant to be."
"Peanut butter and syrup on waffles is one of the single best things I have ever had, also growing up with it"
Mustard?! Don't Let's Be Silly.
"Mustard with scrambled eggs. Actually I haven't had it in a while but from what I remember its really good"
"Mustard with eggs period"
Sauces and dips are critical to enjoying some foods. Mess with it too much and you risk ruining the delicacy. So that's why it's reassuring to see these people offering up their new spins on dip combinations.
Only For The Elegant Dining Experience
"Hummus and salsa mixed together with tortilla chips."
"Fancy bean dip."
Peanut Butter With Everything!
"Peanut butter and cheddar cheese (like the proper brick kind, not kraft cheese slices). When I was a kid I sometimes made myself pb and cheese sandwiches. They're very filling but delicious!"
"Toasted English muffin, butter, peanut butter, raspberry jam and marble cheddar on top. Lord have mercy on me."
"Add a litte hot sauce on the peanut butter."
Better Than Garlic Sauce?
"I already posted but I'm eating pizza with my friend right now and he likes his pizza with hummus."
"Hummus is good with so many things."
"So I make spaghetti noodles, but break up the raw noodles into smaller pieces. Once they're done I put in a an egg or two (mix it around) and let it cook. I swear it's not that bad. My Nonna always makes it for me when I go back to the Midwest to visit. It's good with parmesan cheese too."
And then there's these taste combinations. Mixtures so strange, you might just be willing to walk away from your phone or computer and try one now.
Sweet And Savory?
"Watermelon and feta cheese."
"With red onion and balsamic vinegar."
"Thats like the most basic summer thing in Greece, Balkans, Turkey together with some Uzo or Raki"
Who Lives In A Cheddar Under The Sea?
"Pineapple and cheddar."
"A guy at work introduced me to dipping a peanut butter and honey sandwich into chili. That was surprisingly great."
A Creative Spin On An Old Favorite
"Root beer float except with cherry Coke and chocolate ice cream. I was in middle school on a field trip, last in line at the cream shop, and ordered this after everyone else had done the standard root beer and vanilla. One of the cool girls who had never spoken my name before gave me this piercing look and asked if I would switch with her. I instinctively knew I would get zero benefit from this deal, so I said "Nope, ya gotta just remember it next time." That felt good."
Keep an open mind. Don't do this for every meal, sure, but always be ready to try something new.
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