Sexual invitations are apparently in the eye of the beholder.
Never again will a sneeze or a lollipop be a PG behavior. That stuff gets X-rated QUICK.
When a purely functional action appears wildly sexual, it's a total paradigm shift.
It does not matter if years went by with no promiscuous conclusions. The action could have been totally functional, a mundane behavior of daily life.
But it shifts.
When the threshold is crossed into the sex universe, the once behavior can never regain the old innocence.
It’s like passing the risqué Rubicon.
But this is not the Roman army stuck on the wrong side of a river. This is an array oftongues and lips and teeth and eyes, in no particular order.
All About the Subtext
"When I was 15 I made an animation for my friend's dad's drilling company. It showed a drill rod rotating in and out of a dirt hole which had a patch of grass around it. My mother saw it and told me to rethink it."
COUGH INTO YOUR ELBOW
"When people make a fist to cough into, that second when they have their mouths open, I always imagine them sucking d*ck, always. And it doesn't matter who, everyone." -- tibisay_the_monkey
"Read this. Coughed like this. Got enlightened. Not doing that ever again." -- secksiboi62
In Good Hands
"When a guy is putting the car in reverse and puts his arm around the passenger seat to look behind him." -- kaylapears
"YES LORD" -- Belialzebub
"Highly underrated. Being focused is so hot." -- themoondream
"Pulling out a wedgie/adjusting the crotch area. I'm just feeling like a sandwich down there." -- ParadoxicalProblem
"I feel really embarrassed when I notice my zipper is down. I try to fix it without anyone noticing because I'm afraid they will think I'm doing some perverted stuff." -- oldcoffee
Through a Lens of Loneliness
"When I was younger, getting a hug from a girl would have me fantasizing about our future together for months." -- Diraka
"Sh*t, it wouldn't even take a hug for me. When I was younger, a girl could just be polite while I was paying her for my Auntie Anne's pretzels and before the transaction was over she was the one and we were going to be together forever." -- compendium88
"Look at this player." -- Maselang_Bahaghari
Gotta Be a Freud Quote for this
"The look on your face when you're about to sneeze." -- SomeOriginalContent
"Can confirm. People pay me money to sneeze, and it is definitely sexual to them." -- wanderingnightt
"They say a sneeze is 1/8 of an orgasm. That's why I keep a pepper shaker on my nightstand." -- Torpid-O
The Hot, and the Not So Hot
"Seeing a guy take off a sweater by reaching over his head and pulling it off. I have no idea how guys are able to undress this way but it can definitely be a turn on." -- DazedAndConfused0112
"Because they don't have boobs." -- aqua64
"I stuff my arms into the sleeve then slip my head in..." -- Synzy
"I no longer eat ice cream in public thanks to multiple people telling me that I eat them 'seductively.'" -- dragon8713
"Similarly I got in trouble for deep-throating a popsicle when I was like 8. I don't even know why I did it. My step dad told me to stop." -- Chipring13
"Trying to make a friend of the opposite sex once you're over 25. It's SO hard to just make friends without it seeming like you're trying to get with them." -- ACakeCalledDenial
"I have a female coworker that I chat with regularly, my wife thinks she wants to bang me. 'No, Honey, not all opposite sex relationships have to revolve around sex.'"
"Turns out she was right... but I shut that down lol." -- medium2slow
The Most Innocent, the Most Sexual
"Genuinely listening/responding. I can find you interesting without wanting to get in your pants." -- Sloth_Reborn
"This. God knows how many times I have given the wrong idea because somehow people have come to conclusion that you only listen to opposite gender if you wanna f*ck them." -- Moonlights_Embrace