People Break Down How They Realized Their True Sexual Orientation
Reddit user TheGreek1 asked: 'What made you realize your true sexual orientation?'
Everyone has a different journey on their road to self-discovery.
Especially when it comes to their sexual identity, many young adults struggle with not fitting in and wondering where they belong in social situations.
It's common for many of these individuals to be ashamed and suppress their identity for fear of being judged or ridiculed, while others have a support system at home or among close friends.
Curious to hear how people arrived at their moments of self-discovery, Redditor TheGreek1asked:
"What made you realize your true sexual orientation?"
Exposure to media helped these Redditors with their epiphany.
The Guy On TV
"So one day I saw a tv show, and there was a gay guy in some part of it, so I thought to myself, am I gay? And I came to the conclusion that I am in fact, straight."
– ShapeShiftingBruh
"Same! Or you may see a good looking guy but it doesn’t feel the same way as seeing a good looking woman. I hope that makes sense."
– gomeazy
Erotic Magazine
"I stumbled upon a stack of old playboys when I was 7 actually. I was very very intrigued. Before that I thought boys and girls both had penises lmaoo."
– 335i_lyfe
'Cuz Ya Gotta Have Faith
"I’m dating myself here but George Michael’s video for 'Faith.' At the beginning there is a hot girl in high heels leaning against a jukebox on one side and he’s on the other side. My eyes went to him. I thought, maybe I just want some jeans like that. Naw. I wanted what was IN the jeans."
– shakycam3
Some experimented to determine their sexuality.
Trying Oral
"Honestly? I had some doubts at first. So I let a guy go down on me during a 3some with his girlfriend. He was a freshman psychology student and had just learned about Kinsey and was making a big long speech about how sexuality is a spectrum, and nobody is truly 100% straight, and you know what? It was kind of compelling. So there I am, getting what was probably the third blowjob of my life, and I just can't stay hard. This dude was motivated, and no matter what he did... I think I was every bit as surprised as he was."
– porn0please
Best Buddy Hook-Up
"Same here. I thought, 'let’s try men, see how it goes!' Found myself hooking up with a close male friend who is, by all means, a f'kin smoke show."
"It was a safe space. I felt comfortable. And I learned - at most I’m a Kinsey 1 maybe. Maybe a Kinsey 0.5."
"If I die without ever being with another man, all good."
– astoneworthskipping
Those who were acquainted with or related to these Redditors tried to convince them of their sexuality.
Recognizing Beauty, Not Acting On It
"My sister in law was trying to convince me I was 'bisexual with a preference for men.' She wouldn’t let it go, all because I can appreciate when a woman is beautiful. I told her that I can see when a woman is beautiful, but it doesn’t mean I’m attracted to them."
Little Closeted
"My best friend in high school was a lesbian, and was always trying to convince me that I was bi. I was like, 'lol no, I'm straight af.' Well, one night with my guy of many years, we were opening up about our kinks and- I don't know, I guess I just finally felt safe enough- but I realized I'd always kept a door closed inside of me where I knew I was also attracted to women."
"I've had way too many bad experiences in the past with female friends (who I think were actually crushes) to actually ever think about dating a woman, but I'm definitely also sexually attracted to them."
– Dizzy_Duck5436
Impressions made from a certain age can't be forgotten.
Kindergarten Crush
"When I went to kindergarten round-up when i was 5, I remember seeing two very pretty girls and thinking I would like to kiss them. To be honest, 35 years later those two women are still very pretty and I would still like very much like to kiss them."
– 2aboveaverage
The Handsy Child
"I remember falling in love with my first grade teacher. Ms. Florence. It has always been ladies for me. I read these modern discussions where people are debating sexuality, and it just doesn’t compute. My Grandpa told stories about me putting my hands down women’s shirts at age two/three."
– momentum_1999
My elementary teacher's assistant was a high school student named Randy.
He was the first guy I couldn't take my eyes off of.
He was a redhead, had freckles, and stunning green eyes that looked deep back into mine whenever I pretended I had a question for him but fumbled with my attempt at small talk.
I recognized him as a beautiful man but I didn't understand why I gravitated toward him as I was years from having any kind of sexual comprehension or awakening as a ten-year-old.
But I know for certain that was when I realized I was "different" when I pined for him and wanted to be near him every time I went to school.
I wonder what Randy is up to now?
Do you sometimes think about the people from your past you've had crushes on?
People Reveal How They Figured Out Their Sexual Orientation
Reddit user jacklawd asked: 'How did you conclude that your sexual orientation is what it is?'
When it comes to defining our sexuality, we all have our different journeys.
For some, it's not about arriving at a destination. It's about a constantly evolving state of being and the individual they find along the road to self-discovery and love that dictates who they are in the moment.
Nothing is ever set in stone.
And for others, it's about an innate conviction that informs their sexual identity, even at a premature age prior to having any sexual experiences.
Curious to hear from strangers online about where they fall, Redditor jacklawd asked:
"How did you conclude that your sexual orientation is what it is?"
For some, it was love at first glance.
Love Them Melons
"I was sold on boobs from an early age."
– maclaglen
Nudie Magazine Was Revealing
"I saw a Playboy when I was like 6 and my mind was blown."
– puma721
"Me too, I was 7 (female) and it definitely did something to me. That said as soon as I could could see porn with guys in it, that's what I wanted to look at. I've had sex with women but I never fantasize about them. So I don't really know what I am. Mostly straight but a bit bisexual I guess?"
– sravll
Study In Contrasts
"Look at woman with big chest -> Ooga Booga"
"Look at man with attractive body -> No ooga booga."
– IntermidietlyAverage
"Ripped dude -> good for him."
"Hot woman -> Oh, baby!"
– CCPMustGo
When You Know, You Know
"Basically this lol. I can look at a guy and say he's attractive guy with nice body but past that I'm just happy for him."
"See an attractive woman though and yeah thoughts are more like she's pretty I would want to take her on a date and do stuff."
– MysteryMan999
These Redditors were put through the test.
The Influence Factor
"Spaghettisexual - straight until wet."
– IllPanYourMeltIn
"'Six beer queer' is the other one."
– oopsneedathrowaway
"I've never felt more understood than I do right now."
– Malhablada
Very Fluid
"I'm kinda the same. I used to say I was 'straight-leaning pan' because I actively prefer and seek out relationships with women but a strong emotional connection isn't dependent on gender. Eventually I discovered the term 'heteroflexible' and immediately identified with it. My preferences are hetero, my heart is demi-pan."
– GingerlyRough
Innocent Observation
"I was putting clothes back on my daughter's Ken doll. My son asked why I was doing it and I told him it's because she took his clothes off. He wanted to know why she took his clothes off. I told him maybe it was the same reason he takes the clothes off her Barbie. He thought about it a moment, looked confused and said, 'But Ken isn't fun naked!'"
– KennyanneConway
It was never up for a debate, and experimenting wasn't an option.
Siren Of The Screen
"I saw Selma Hayek. And my brain shut down."
– 1w2e3e
"Hooolyyyyy SH*T. Do you remember her in Dusk til Dawn, or Dogma? Oh my Gawd. It's like a mental hard reset. My brain is panicking just thinking about it. Good lord."
– hail_SAGAN42
Just The Fairer Sex
"Idk I’ve always been attracted to women Never really wanted to try anything with guys."
– CephalonPhathom
Standing Bi Their Decision
"Saw a hot girl. Saw a hot guy. Thought 'yeah both is good.'”
– HailYourSelf717
"both?" "Both.." "Both." "Both is good"
– Attack_AC130
Hot For Teacher
"At 15 all my friends constantly talked about their crushes on our male classmates or their favorite male rock star. I was constantly thinking about my female teacher. My thoughts were never physical; they were about mundane things. So I tried to convince myself I wasn’t gay. But I knew I couldn’t talk about my feelings. One day in class I was sitting on the floor with some other students and the teacher randomly put her hand on the top of my head. I felt like I was going to faint. The infatuation lasted a couple of years. If I saw her walk by all the way across the cafeteria I would be in a good mood the rest of the day."
"A couple of years later it happened again with a coworker closer to my age. The constant thoughts started up, just mundane things like replaying our discussions in my head. One day I had to talk to her about something. I was standing about 3 feet in front of her and looking at her, and I felt like I wasn’t going to be able to breathe."
– mythrowaweighin
The thread demonstrated that many of us have fought against or contemplated various scenarios before being comfortable with who we are to allow ourselves to experience defining life moments.
Nothing is hardly ever black or white.
It's interesting then that the ignorant contingent repeatedly argues that people "choose to be gay," because that makes sense. Do they think people deliberately choose to live a life being constantly subjected to ridicule, judgment, and endless bullying?
Not only does that rationality not make sense, but, unfortunately, statements like that only invalidate the existence of people in the LGBTQ+ community, or worse, prevent them, from coming out of the closet.
Why can't people eat bananas or cucumbers without having someone make a comment?
Okay, we get it, men have been said to think with their um... phalluses and many societies seem to have a preoccupation with the phallus in general. Take a look at some statues and monuments.
But that's not the only thing out there that's been sexualized – far from it. It's just the most obvious. People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor Artane_33 asked the online community,
"What’s sexualized but shouldn’t or doesn’t need to be?"
"It gets in the way..."
"I need to run my fingers through my hair sometimes. It gets in the way, it blows around, whatever. IT'S NOT FLIRTING BRO MY HAIR IS JUST PISSING ME OFF AND IM TRYNA MOVE IT OUT MY FACE."
bunnisx
So when I was playing with my hair in class, you mean to say I wasn't flirting at all?!
"If anyone stares..."
"If anyone stares I attempt to make eating my banana as sexual as possible while maintaining eye contact."
[deleted]
Ah, yes... a power move. I see you too are a person of culture.
"Getting stuck..."
"Getting stuck in places."
nohiddenmeaning
"I just wanna..."
"Hot dogs. I just wanna peacefully eat a glizzy in public without feeling weird."
maquillage
Where are you from that they call hot dogs glizzies?
"Everything..."
"Everything father-daughter related."
pacuqi33
Probably one of the most popular porn categories, too.
"Don't forget..."
"Don't forget eggplants!"
Nyarro
Or carrots! It's just a root, people!
"Maybe it's just me..."
"The word "come" in normal sentences. Maybe it's just me, I try not to use it much in sentences, shifted to arrive or reached."
BitterUmpire7339
"Oh good heavens, I'm arriving!"
Is that better?
No?
Okay.
"The green..."
"The green M&M…"
[deleted]
Don't remind us. Fox News dedicated quite some time to this recently.
"I just want to say..."
"I just want to say the number 69 without being embarrassed."
UsedAdd665
But you can't, okay? You can't.
Thank you, society...
"Practically..."
"Practically everything at this point."
infusideines
This comment is looking pretty sexy...
Face it – just about everything has been sexualized. We live in a society that runs on sex... and money. Especially the latter. Imagine what happens when you combine the two.
Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
Few things are as good a confidence boost as when someone lets you know how sexy they think you are. You don't even need to be in bed... but it certainly helps.
Let's be real: It's great to know when you're pleasing someone.
People shared their stories with us after Redditor Gthew asked the online community,
"What's the sexiest thing someone has ever said to you?"
"I like your voice..."
"“I like your voice” after I apologized for stuttering for a straight 2 and a half minutes."
Rice_cakes
It's nice to receive a little validation, isn't it?
"Been with this gem..."
"“You don’t have to be in a good mood for me to want your company.”
"Been with this gem for 3 years."
solanum
Awww, this is sweet. It's great to have someone who will support you through good and bad times.
"When my girlfriend and I..."
"When my girlfriend and I started seeing each other, one night when we were going at it, she was panting and when she looked me in the eyes she said “oh I can’t get enough of you” in between breaths and I think I fell in love."
Zahama
There's a keeper if there ever was one! Sounds like you're both still together!
"I love you."
"I love you."
"Come from an immigrant background where my parents have never uttered those words, and when a woman I liked said that to me, it was a level of validation that it made life livable for the first time."
dignityputnam
It's great to hear that you've found someone who loves you – and isn't afraid to say it!
"I wasn't sleepy anymore."
"I was just getting into a relationship with a woman. It was kind of long distance, we only got to see each other on weekends. But we talked every day. We hadn't been physically intimate yet, but we had made out a fooled around a little."
"So one night we were on the phone and I yawned and told her I needed to get to sleep. She said she understood. But just before she hung up she said, "OK, good night, I'm going to touch myself to the thought of you then go to bed to." She then hung up before I could answer. I wasn't sleepy anymore.""
[deleted]
Bold – and it sounds like you had the reaction she wanted.
"I was venting..."
"I was venting my frustration over not being able to find nice gloves at the store because I have bear paws for hands, and the selection of XL gloves is fairly non-existent. She looked at me and told me she loved my huge hands, especially my thick fingers."
irishlyrucked
This is just the right mixture of coded and bold that can really get someone in the mood.
"After we had sex..."
"The first time I had sex with my partner I was wearing a front zip corset top and went to unzip it and my partner stopped me and said, 'Please, let me undress you,' and unzipped it soooo slowly. After we had sex I cried because I never felt so desired before in my whole life. (5 years later still going strong!)."
itspapitopepito
Five years! May you have another five... and another five... and another five...
"Lifted someone up..."
"Lifted someone up during intercourse and she said, 'This is my fantasy.' I felt on top of the world for a bit there."
tierneyb
This is the perfect combination of hot/sexy/sweet and everything else. I absolutely love this.
"We were on a date..."
"We were on a date, and I had told her I was recently divorced. After having sex later that night, she turns to me and says, 'Your ex-wife was a f*cking idiot.'"
2aboveaverage
Hopefully you're still with her – that's such a confidence boost.
"Not really sexy..."
"Not really sexy but my girlfriend sat on my lap as a joke and told her to get off because I was getting hard. She said, 'I don’t care' and kissed me."
[deleted]
Hey, don't sell this moment short – that's absolutely sexy!
Okay, these stories made us feel things...
Well, what are you waiting for? Just be honest... your partner will certainly appreciate it.
Have some stories of your own? Feel free to sound off in the comments below!
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
People Explain Which Ordinary Items Have Become Hypersexualized
If you were to objectively examine pop culture in the United States, you would decide the country is obsessed with sex.
Innuendos and outright blatant displays permeate advertising, music, TV and movies.
And then there are the completely nonsexual items that somehow ended up being associated with sex.
Redditor CharmingWitty asked:
"What is an ordinary item that is overly sexualized?"
Eggplant
"Eggplant"
- Cometguy7
"Men: if it looks like an eggplant, go to the doctor."
- NatStr9430
"Specially this 🍆"
- CharmingWitty
"They are not at all penis shaped. They are club shaped. No penis looks like that."
- Trees_and_bees_plees
GiphyMassagers
"Massager."
"My wife has a Magic Wand that we legit use for massages and nothing else but feel like we need to hide it from plain sight."
- adiosmith3
"Damn it, some of us really do need a phallic-shaped shoulder massager!"
- JonGilbony
GiphyCucumber
"Cucumber"
- koala60
"I always feel awkward buying cucumbers as a woman."
"I know I’m just making salad, and I know other people aren’t looking at my produce purchases assuming their naughty by nature, but still… they’re so phallic."
- freya_of_milfgaard
"Just put them next to other stuff in your cart so it's not so obvious, like two plums."
- hobokenbob
"Let’s see… one cucumber, two plums, a jar of coconut oil, some candles, a Barry White cd… just the usual stuff."
- freya_of_milfgaard
Lotion
"Lotion"
- Emile_The_Great
"Lotion/tissue combo. I have dry skin and allergies, man!"
- TheHadokenite
"I go through lotion and tissues at an incredible rate. Never once used the combo for that."
- horselips48
AskReddit
"Probably the subReddit AskReddit."
- MicronQ
“People of Reddit, Sexy sex sexy sex sexual sexy sex sex?"
- EPIC_PORN_ALT
"Women of Reddit, what is the most sex you ever sexed?"
- hattorihanzo5
"Redditor for 1 year. This is the real deal."
- LIEUTENANT__CRUNCH
GiphyRiding Crops
"Riding crops."
"I have one I bought when I rode horses for years, still have it and everyone assumes it's a sex thing."
- chut2906
"Riding crops, leather care products, and a large assortment of ropes tend to earn some pretty dirty looks."
- RoryFoxey
GiphyBanana
"Banana"
- Keke_Dudu
"Just let me eat my banana without making me feel weird."
- cameronedwards69
"I used to eat my banana like corn on the cob just in case."
- GodOfMoominism
"Strangers still looked at you funny, just for a different reason altogether."
- MusikPolice
"I blame all those condom PSAs. Why did they always have to use a banana?"
- LakotaGrl
GiphyHandcuffs
"It used to be that a handcuff collection meant that you were a nerd into magic..."
- s4b3r6
GiphyTwins
"Female twins."
"Ugh. I hated the questions growing up and through high school."
"No, we do not get 'freaky', she is my sister."
- kdawg2894
"I had a grown man ask me in all seriousness If my twin and I swap boyfriends because ‘we’re the same person’ so apparently our boyfriends won’t know the difference."
"I had to tell him that not only will they know the difference but I am not attracted to her boyfriend, nor her to mine… he did not believe me."
- SiennaStyles
"Also assumes your boyfriends only know or like you for your appearance and that you’re not actually two separate people."
- QSB59
"Yeah, it seems like a wild concept to people who haven't spent any time around identical twins before, but they're actually very different people, and it's very easy to tell them apart when you know them."
"I knew a few sets of twins growing up, and never had any issue identifying any of them."
- JerHat
GiphyThe Female Body
"Shoulders."
"All schools disliked that."
- HeyyIhateMyself45
"Don’t even get me started on the clavicle."
- jeswesky
"and knees"
- foreverritzel
"Dem ankles tho."
- hollow1367
"For real."
"I understand some women may not feel comfortable showing their shoulders and that's fine, but they shouldn't feel like they have to cover them up because of men's thoughts."
"It's so pathetic to blame men's thoughts and behavior on the way women dress."
- kb4000
"Girls can't show any joint in your body unless it's knuckles because 'it's distracting' but God forbid anyone has to wear a mask during a global pandemic."
- BirdsLikeSka
GiphyThe United States isn't alone in hypersexualizing things unrelated to sex.
But many studies point to the country's puritanical approach to the topic of sex and sexuality as well as the human body as a reason why the USA seems to be leading the way in many respects.
It's just sex. It's just biology and anatomy.
Loosen up, people.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.