Horror comes in many forms.
Sometimes the scary moments we encounter draw their horror from the eerie unknown in the same way horror films spook us.
Other times, terror comes in a very real-world, pragmatic form--sudden and grave danger of complete vulnerability.
However it comes, it's a whole lot better to read about it on the internet than experience it first hand.
Redditor aggressivepicklenato asked:
"What is the scariest thing that's happened to you?"
Of course, driving an automobile is one of the scariest, most dangerous things we can do. We often forget that, until one moment reminds us.
Out of Control
"Heart attack while I was driving. Pulled over and went into cardiac arrest." -- Big-Craft-72
"So you got arrested while driving." -- Quirinus84
"I was driving home late one night when I saw a girl on the side of the road, asking for help. I distinctly remember every nerve in my body suddenly going on edge, and I locked the doors as I drove past (old car had manual locks)."
"But something was telling me that no matter what, I shouldn't stop and help this girl. As I went by her I remember her yelling 'Fu** you!' "
"I felt guilty for not doing anything about it, so next morning I looked up reports in the area to see if I could find information on her. Turns out a guy got car jacked in the exact same area trying to help a girl in distress."
"He pulled over, and a group of people beat him and left him on the side of the road while they took his car. The girl in the report perfectly matched the description of the girl I saw."
Everything Stopped for a Second
"Truck swerved into my lane going highway speeds this last winter and smoked us. My wife, 3 kids and dog were in the car."
"The scariest part wasn't the impact, or the realization that we were about to get fu**ed. It was the brief moment of stunned silence after, the moment I turned around to see if everyone in my family was ok."
"Thankfully, my kids escaped with no injury, my wife had to undergo surgery for internal bleeding (but ultimately recovered and is great today) and my sweet, lucky old dog. Somehow, he survived getting tossed around in the trunk."
When You Realize How Fast You Were Going
"I had a tire blow out while I was on the highway. I felt the wheel start to vibrate and my heart just dropped. Cars were flying by at least 70 mph as I'm trying to merge onto the shoulder."
"I have had anxiety about driving on the highway since then"
Others traced their horror back to the unbelievable power of the natural world.
At the Whims of Giant Plates
"I live in San Francisco, in 1989 we had an earthquake. It was so intense, it moved my refrigerator to the other side of the room."
"I've never felt that adrenaline fright as much as that day."
"Nearly getting swept out to sea while swimming alone in the ocean and barely making it back to shore."
"This would be super scary now, but for 6 year old me this was TERRIFYING. I was out hiking with my cub scouts group, and I was trailing behind."
"I fell, slipped a couple feet down a hill, and got my leg caught under a log. It was only the start of the hike and it was pretty long, so I was terrified that I'd be stuck there for almost 2 hours. This is canada, during bear season."
"They came back after about 5 minutes. Present me would've know that probably would've happened, but that was terrifying for 6 y/o me."
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And others recalled the times they were sure violence--and even death--were coming straight for them.
A Surge of Violence
"My ex is an angry drunk.. one night we got drunk for our mutual friends birthday. The birthday girl and her bf started getting in a big fight so we separated them. While doing that we got separated and couldn't find each other. I found him after about an hour."
"He was pi**ed I took birthday girl home and didn't care about him being at the bar alone with her bf. So he punches my car windshield out and chases me into the house. He catches up to me and pulls me by my head down to the floor. Proceeds to put one hand over my mouth and one hand around my neck."
"I remember nothing but begging for him to let go. Every second felt like a lifetime without air. On top of him sitting on top of me and the crying I was doing. I never thought I'd ever beg for my life like that. I was literally saying sh** like 'please just take your hand off my mouth, I'll do anything, please, I can't breathe!' "
"Eventually he just snapped out of it and let go in self pity 'omg what am I doing' and I ran upstairs to my roommates as he chased me again to try to not let them know what happened. Luckily I got to them in time and they called the police."
Lock Up Your Guns!!
"I was 13 and baby sitting two 7 year old boys. One of the boys found his dad's gun. They proceeded to point it at me and threaten to shoot me, because they found it funny."
"I still don't know how I talked them into putting the gun away. I had been baby sitting them for a year on Wednesdays. That was the last night I did though."
"Found myself behind my high school with a bunch of kids who didn't know who I was. They threatened me and pulled knives."
"I still don't know how I managed to talk my way out of it but I got out of there as quick as I could"
When I was 12
"My step dad was angry in general and even angrier drunk, which he typically was. One day he decided to scream at me for some reason or another while I'm minding my own business, and he told me he was going to get his shotgun from his mom so he could shoot me. I was 12."
"I called the police, and he started to backtrack and beg me not to call on him. I told the officer to please take me to a friend's house. On the way, the officer was telling me that my stepdad was just drunk and didn't mean any of it. This was a small town where everyone knew each other."
"I suffer from psychosis and I would have to say hallucinations."
"Psychosis was def the scariest thing I've ever been through in my life, and I'm sorry you struggle with it consistently. I went through it three separate times, some lasting days last summer. It was like waking sleep paralysis. At one point I thought I was bleeding out into my carpet, hallucinating the blood and having tactile hallucinations I was wet and sticky and my blood pressure dropped so low I had to be brought to the hospital. I hope you're in a better place. Take your meds, that's what made my hallucinations stop and I eventually began to be able to function."
In the blink of an eye
"10 months ago when I heard a crash in the bathroom my husband was in and he didn't answer me when I called out asking if he was ok. Called 911 as I struggled to get the door open. Got in. Found him facedown. I rolled him over, and he exhaled for the last time in my arms. I tried to breathe for him, compress his chest."
"But I already knew he was gone. And in that moment, it was like a bomb exploded in the middle of my life. It's scary when you've lost your person, your love, the most important thing in the world to you. When your life changes in an instant. I went from being a happy wife to a 31-year-old widow with an uncertain future. In the blink of an eye."
A Trip to Florida...
"Wend for a scuba dive trip down in Florida. On the second day we were just finishing the dive in the Spiegel grove when out of the blue I see a panicked diver heading towards me. He shows me his digital console and there is a big fat 0 there. Gave him my spare second stage."
"The current was very strong and we still had to either descend another 15' or so to the main deck holding on to the railings to reach the boat line which was tied to one of the cranes , or gun against the current directly to the line. I chose the second. By the time we barely made to the line, i started to feel a little water in my regulator. That is a sign my air was depleting. The panicked guy was breathing like a bull. I switched him to my buddy's air and signaled to continue the ascension."
"Luckily as the pressure decreases, air expands a little in the system so o could still breathe up to 15'. I left the two of them there to do a safety stop and surfaced. With them surfacing 3 minutes later. Long story short, he lost visual contact with his buddies during the dive, panicked and used all of his air looking for them. Not following your training can get you killed."
Testing for Weakness
"Woke up around 3am one night to loud tapping outside my bedroom window (my bedroom was in the basement of our house). I assumed it was raccoons or something trying to get into our neighbour's shed. After listening for a while longer I managed to fall back asleep. In the morning I brought up the noise to my mom who said she had heard a similar noise coming from that same side of the house, only she got out of bed and went to the front living room window to investigate."
"What she saw was a man emerge from between our house and our neighbour's place. He stopped in front of our home, took a long look before removing a pair of latex gloves and then proceeded to walk down our street. I assume he was testing for weak spots or something and luckily didn't manage to make it inside that night."
"Mugged and beat up at 1AM behind a dumpster in Denver when I was 19."
"Spinning out on a highway due to hydroplaning. Ended up barely tapping another car, but I thought I was done for."
"Sorry to make it about me but you just reminded me of my first "accident" a few years ago. It had rained the week prior so the ground was very mushy. First snow of the year and it had snowed a good 3-4in (and it was the nasty lake effect snow all Michiganders know)."
"I'm in the left lane, there's a smallish SUV ahead of me and a semi next to them. Then a pickup truck was trying to merge on to the highway. I think what he did was to try to beat the semi truck by speeding the heck up instead of being smart and just entering the highway like a normal person. This fool literally spun out a MINIMUM of 6 times."
"I tried following the path of the little SUV in front of me (in a company Nissan Sentra) which included slightly going off the road. I would have been fine until the pickup barely clipped my car and sent me into the median. And since it had been raining the week before, I was completely unable to get traction to get out. The pickup? Never stopped. By the time I realized he wasn't going to stop, it was too far away to read the license plate. A**hole."
"Also, sleepwalking. Holy crap, is it scary and disorienting to go to sleep in your bed and wake up mid stride through the living room, bruised and bleeding from bumping into things. Night terrors and sleep paralysis are also quite awful. I've experienced all of the above more times than I care to remember."
Dad, what are you doing?
"Fell asleep in the living room watching TV. Wake up around midnight to my Dad walking pass me. He heads to the side door, unlocks it and starts walking to the chicken coop. By the time he's outside I'm up and following after him; calling out in a whisper "Dad, what are you doing?" - no response, I think maybe he can't hear me despite being only a few steps behind him."
"Dad walks in to the chicken coop and I lose sight of him for about two seconds - I walk in to chicken coop and... it's empty. I'm very confused now. There is only one door for the coop and I'm standing in it. Suddenly, there's a hand on my shoulder. Almost jump out of my skin and whirl around - it's my Dad. He heard me walking outside, had followed after me trying to call out my name but for some reason I hadn't heard him."
Surely you have your own example of the most horrifying moment of your life. Here's hoping the scars haven't lasted too long or burrowed too deep.
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Every single day, we are forced to deal with all sorts of things that we'd prefer to never see, hear, touch, or experience for the rest of our lives.
And yet, we understand that plenty of those moments are completely out of our control. We deal with the annoyances and get on with our day.
But most of us have a breaking point. There are some things out there that we truly hate. So much, in fact, that we cannot even focus when they come along.
The worst part of it all? Sometimes the thing we hate is loved by others, so it's all around us all the time.
Redditor Nighthawk2288 asked:
"What is something/someone extremely popular that you utterly despise?"
Many Redditors are most turned off by the latest changes to culture thanks to the internet.
Pulling You In
"These posts on all social media sites that are like 'your second friend has to do X' that are just prompting you to tag people who don't want to be tagged, to drive up engagement on whatever the page put the post out."
"In the same vein: obvious scam posts about giving away a house (no one fu**ing does that) and sh** like 'how old will you be in 2060/your mothers maiden name and the first letter of your birth month are your stripper name!' That people somehow fall for."
Unfortunately, It's Probably Not Going Anywhere
"The term 'life hack' " -- Believeland-OH
"I know.I hate that too. You can't hack life! This isn't the matrix!" -- Afraid-Baby8276\
"Life hack! Plant seeds from your vegetables for free food!" -- Suyujin
Others had a bigger problem with celebrities and the other famous individuals that we can't seem to ignore. And again, the internet had a lot to do with it.
Always Less Than
"I dislike the worship of celebrities.I think it can create toxic fanbases where people lives can become totally consumed by that person and attack others who dislike that person.Very unhealthy."
"Any of those Kardashian people, they all look very tacky and artificial. But are a pretty good reflection of our society. I can see why our society loves them"
And others offered up some odd ball choices.
Little Rhyme and Reason
"Bananas. The combination of the taste and texture sets something off in me, and is even overpowering when blended into a smoothie. Nothing really against them, I just hate eating them personally."
"Banana bread is alright though. I don't know either."
Everywhere They Turn
"Felt. You'd be surprised how frequently it's used in many things. It's texture makes me want to hurl."
"ORCA FU**ING WHALES. THEY ARE BLACK AND WHITE PANDA-@SS OF THE SEA AND I DO NOT CONDONE THEM."
"THIS MESSAGE WAS BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE SPERM WHALE GANG"
They Are Pretty Squishy
"Bubble tea honestly. It looks like someone stuck Orbeez in a drink and called it a day. They are disgusting too."
Surely these are not the only despised popular trends out there. But whatever yours is, know that you're not alone in freaking out when nobody else is.
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As much as the narrative of the drunken nighttime tattoo excursion has some appeal, the truth is that tattoos are important decisions.
They are permanent, they're often visible and elicit questions from the people you interact with, and whether or not the finish product looks good is dependent on a slew of factors.
So anyone seriously interested in getting one--especially if they never have before--would benefit from some guidance.
Redditor Syrewolf asked:
"What advice do you have for someone looking to get their first tattoo?"
Many people emphasized the permanence of a tattoo. They described ways to help people be sure they're absolutely certain about their choice.
Everywhere You Look
"I had my first tattoo set as a background, screensaver and picture next to my bed for a full year before getting it done. figured if I could look at it everyday for a year and still want it, it was a good idea."
Daily Check In
"Put a picture of the tattoo you want next to something you look at often (bathroom mirror for example) and just leave it there for a few months to make sure that design doesn't get old to you."
Simulate the Future
"If you're feeling unsure, try using photoshop or similar to edit the desired tattoo onto your body to see if you like it—it's not a perfect solution but it can help you have a better idea of what you're getting."
"I would also recommend letting yourself marinate on one design for 6-12 months to make sure it's what you want."
Other people explained the importance of going through all the right motions to make the thing a legitimate, nice looking piece of body art.
Not All Artists Are Equal
"Get a good artist."
"Make sure you have seen examples of their work, ON PEOPLE. A art portfolio is nice and all, but the difference between working with paper and working with flesh is gigantic."
"I knew a dude who did tattoos for years. Dude still can't write or spell correctly and the art is badly mediocre, at best."
"Make sure you've seen what they have done on actual people."
"Good artists get pricey. But you're gonna live with this forever and it will be what others see. Make sure it's something worth looking at."
Get the Good Stuff
"GET IT DONE PROFESSIONALLY."
"I got my first tattoo only about a month ago, and it's on the right side of my right calf. it didn't hurt too bad, I got it from a family friend that does tattoos-"
"I hate it so much. it's awfully done, the lines aren't even, and it got infected because he didn't use a clean needle."
"Also, I know this sounds like common sense, but make sure ur artist is giving you what you want!! I wanted a moon and stars but he ended up doing musical symbols??? another reason I hate it lol."
Know Their Strengths
"Research the artists in your area. So many people walk into shops wanting, let's say, a portrait done by someone who doesn't do portraits. And then moaning when it's not quite right. Tattoo artists are very versatile but they're human and they have a comfort zone. A style they prefer."
"For example, in my area there is are a few portrait guys, a guy who specialises in traditional old school tattoos and a few who can only do flash."
"And like everyone else has said, don't go cheap and please don't go for a kitchen job. That is someone who comes to your house and does it. Most of these guys you'll never hear from again."
"If you find yourself questioning if you can afford it or not, don't do it yet. Save up more. Tattoos are one of the things you should NEVER compromise on. Find an artist you like (they'll be $150/hr or more) and use that one. Don't skimp and head to the shi**y strip mall joint with no reputation. Spend the money, because its there for life."
"Tattoos and land - those are the only two things you're pretty much gonna keep for life."
Finally, some people spoke to those people that want a tattoo but were struggling to take the leap.
Keep It Casual
"Get whatever you want, if you think it's cool get it. I personally just enjoy getting tattoos. It doesn't have to be meaningful, if you like it you like it. My half sleeve was completely designed by my artist. Just him ideas of what I thought."
Listen To Your Gut
"Get it where you want to get it. You might worry about a certain area being more painful to get tattooed than another, but if you want it in the more painful area, get it there. The pain only lasts a few hours, but the tattoo is permanent."
Be Intentional, But Go For It
"Don't stress so much about it. Get something small and simple that you like from an artist whose work you think is good. Follow them on Instagram for a couple months before choosing them."
"There's no need for it to be a complicated image you spend years thinking about and designing perfectly, you can do that later when you have more experience."
"Also, follow aftercare instructions perfectly!"
So go out there and get inked, people!
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Sometimes the pressure of of having a wonderful time on your birthday can put undue stress on a thing that should be, above all, relaxing and enjoyable.
That can make us zero in on the occasional slights and bits of selfishness in our friends and loved ones on our big day.
But nit-picky observations are one thing, and glaring affronts are a whole other.
A recent Reddit thread asked people to share the most sensationally awful birthdays they've ever had.
Redditor hated1327 asked:
"What is your 'worst birthday ever' story?"
Many recalled the birthdays that left them stuck doing an activity that they had absolutely zero interest in.
The Clear Priority
"My fifteenth birthday, was on holiday with my bio-dad and step mum who despised me and my sister. My dad wished me a happy birthday and asked me what I would like to do, before I could answer my step mother insisted she needed a new pair of shoes."
"I spent my fifteenth birthday sitting quietly in the corner of a shoe shop while somebody who hated me and wanted to alienate me from my father tried on endless pairs of shoes, that he would buy for her."
Polite and Quiet
"On my 21st birthday, a family friend who is an old lady invited me and my family to a dinner with her and her family, because by the Lunar calendar her birthday was on the same day as mine."
"Her family and my parents can all speak Cantonese. I cannot. They decided to go to a seafood restaurant. I am allergic to most seafoods."
"I spent my 21st birthday sitting at a table full of people not saying anything and not eating anything, because I couldn't do either."
Like Any Other Day
"I was really excited for my 19th birthday. I was going to have lunch with my gf, hang out with my friends after, and end the evening with pizza at my parents' home (as is family tradition; fu** cake)."
"The gf's mum picks me up (no car at the time because I was living with the gf and paying rent) and we go down to her university and she has to pick up some books so we go to the bookstore and she kills 2 hours in lines and shopping for clothing. Not all the books were bought so we went to an off-campus book store. Another hour or so in line. I text my friends and cancel our plans."
"We then go to The Olive Garden and she spends the whole time talking to her mum about something that the mum's most recent bf did. Started chatting up the server and mentioned it was my birthday to her SHE wished me a happy birthday. Gf looked at me puzzled. She had forgotten it."
"It's now 8pm and we are driving home. I'm in the backseat and I call my parents and tell them that I'll be home soon. There's an accident down the road on The highway... My parents call me and ask where I am. I tell them to eat without me. 3 hours later we are out of the traffic jam and I go to my parents home and cry."
"Broke up with her a few weeks later because she was cheating on me (for months now) and I was still salty about her forgetting my birthday and ruining that day. I hope you have a happy birthday! May it be less shitty than my worst."
Others talked about the times they found themselves forced to feel uncomfortable for someone else who wasn't having a good time.
A Complete About Face
"On my 22nd birthday, my housemates girlfriend insisted we go out. She kept badgering me about it until I named a local place that was semi-expensive, I also said chilis. She kept pushing for the more expensive place insisting it was my special day."
"We got there, she looked at the menus and immediately threw a fit, complaining she couldn't afford anything. When her boyfriend attempted to buy her meal, she declined him multiple times, and refused to share his as a compromise."
"For the rest of the night we ate in silence interrupted by her complaining about hunger pangs and how anyone could afford the place she had insisted we all go to."
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Leading With a Guilt Trip
"My wife hates going to the movies so for my birthday one year she relented and took me to one I had been dying to see. This was all her idea and when she told me what we were doing I was super excited. As we are pulling up to the theater she starts guilting me with 'do you REALLY want to go see this?' and guess what, we didn't."
"Two years ago she was going to cook my favorite meal for me but put it off until the last minute and so then made some BS excuse about how she had plans to take me and the kids out for dinner. We get all loaded up in the car and she says, 'where do you want to go?' she had no plans."
"I was pissed but I picked a place but the wait was too long for her so we fought and I ended up eating a bowl of Chex for my birthday dinner. She will make elaborate plans for anyone and everyone else's birthday but when it comes to mine she uses it as an excuse to give me a big Fu** You!"
Red Flags Everywhere
"21st birthday. The week leading up to it my (now ex - thank fu**) boyfriend had been ignoring me, typical sh**. So the day comes, we take a boat ride (not my idea but hey, who cares it's only my birthday). Naturally after we end up at the bars, working our way back home and surely enough I'm drunk off my a** by the time we get there."
"So seeing this, he decides that now would be a good time to pick a huge argument with me in the middle of the bar, followed by a dramatic exit so he could smoke a cigarette, or so I assumed. It wasn't until I realized it had been like 20 or so minutes that I walked outside to realize he had left me there."
"Yeah. That one definitely takes the cake for me."
Others shared the sensationally bad birthdays. These were almost cartoonishly awful.
"10th birthday. my mom got a pinata. my best friend was trying to hit the pinata. on his back swing, he clocked me right in the forehead, but on his forward swing, he broke open the pinata. all of my friends saw the candy and immediately rushed to it while I was laying on the ground bleeding with a huge gash right above my eyebrow."
"I had to go to the hospital and get 5 stitches."
Into the Abyss
"When i was 5 I had a large birthday party at my house with everyone from my neighborhood and kindergarten class. We had a clown and a bounce house and everything. After the clown performed we all got in the pool and the next thing I know my dad is yelling at this kid 'dont let go of the damn cat.' "
"The kid let go of my brand new kitten and it went straight up in the air because he tied all of the balloons to its collar. So, we all watched my kitten get hung and disappear almost 29 years ago. =("
"Everything was going well, until I sat down with an opened Birthday Badge in my trouser pocket."
"The pinner pierced my testicle and I had to go to A & E."
Here's hoping that these people never endure a birthday that tops these bad examples.
As much as we'd all love to believe that we can brush off unkind words, it's simply not true. There are some things that all the confidence and self-esteem in the universe couldn't protect us from.
Of course, mean words and shocking statements hit hardest when they come from someone we're close with: a friend, a parent, a romantic partner.
And not only do they hit hard in the moment, but they sting for years and years.
A recent Reddit thread asked folks to dredge up the worst of the worst.
Redditor IceMountain10 asked:
"What's the most fu**ed up thing someone has ever said to you?"
Many people talked about the wildly upsetting things their parents have said to them. These statements are enough to leave one wondering just how things got to the point they did.
Inverse Role Model
" 'you're adopted, you don't get to have opinions' "
" 'you're going to end up like your real dad' my real dad was an alcoholic and an addict. He fu**ed up his life and never came back."
" 'is that the only reason you fu**en came home?' "
"Said by my mother in front of my 8th-grade counselor who had brought me home and explained to my mother that my 40-year-old stepbrother had sexually assaulted me twice. I'll never forget my mother's look of disdain or the look of utter horror on my counselor's face."
"When I was 7 my mother and step father were having relationship issues. After a fight in which she ended up leaving the house, my step father sat me down. He gave me an extremely longwinded speech about why I was a terrible, bastard child."
"I don't remember much of it, but he ended it by saying, 'It's your fault your mom and I are breaking up. You're rotten and I hate you.' I don't think I'll ever forget that."
Cartoonish In It's Meanness
" 'I dont love you, I never did, and I regret not aborting you. You and your father have ruined my life and I hate you both.' " ~My mother when I was 10.
"I do not regret ending my relationship with her at all."
Others talked about the people in positions of authority that demoralized them. It stings so much more when it's someone you'd like to respect.
Joke's On Him
"In college I studied journalism but I had to take a required PR class. We had to keep these journals about our thoughts about news events for some reason, and I was trying to be thought-provoking..."
"...and so I wrote about this theory about why college students tend to be apathetic about the news, it had to do with the insular nature of the college campus. It was probably bullsh**, but I was writing about a theory I had."
"The professor ripped it apart and then ended his scribbling with 'I find it hard to believe you will succeed at anything, much less journalism.' "
"I went on to write for ESPN, so he can kick rocks."
How Not to Motivate a Child
"Not me but this one takes it"
"In high school, one of my classmate's dad died at the start of the year. All the teachers knew as he'd talked about it and been absent over it. Fast forward a few months and the kid handed in 'sloppy' homework as the teacher called it. Then, he made a point of, in front of class, saying 'your dad would be embarrassed' "
"Kid just got up, picked up his things and walked out. Pretty sure we all universally hated that teacher after that"
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"When my mom got diagnosed with stage IV cancer, my boss at the time said she was excited that I was getting to go through this. She meant it in a 'beat an obstacle that life throws at you' kinda way."
"My mom passed away two years later and there was nothing exciting about watching her deteriorate and having to say goodbye. Who the fu** says that?!"
Finally, some people's peers, be it significant others or close friends, were the ones to deliver the verbal blow.
Enough Was Enough
"I've had leukemia a couple of times and my then wife looked at me during an argument and said these words, 'I hope this cancer eats you from the inside out, and that no one is by your side when you die!' I wad so stunned I just turned around and went to the bedroom and went to sleep."
"The next morning she literally said 'I'm sorry I said those things last night, but you know how angry you get me.' I left the next day and never looked back. It was twelve years of hell with her and I stuck through it to be around my kids, but at that moment I knew this had to be it or I'd never get out."
Turning Their Back
" 'I've decided to remove The Problem (you) from my life since it's affecting me too.' "
"my friend said this to me after he found out that I got sexually assaulted. By his friend."
It All Becomes Clear
"My ex finished our relationship after 15yrs. To me it was out of the blue. 5 days later my best friend told me that 'you should be over it by now' as I'm sobbing my heart out to her."
"To her I should have been able to mourn and grieve my 15 year relationship in just 5 days!! Turns out he was cheating on me with her"
And as we end this list all feeling a little sympathetic and maybe even upset about our own examples, let's flip it around: when did you say something so nice to someone they were stunned?