I once overheard my dad call me fat. It sucked. He wasn't being mean, he was attempting to describe me to a stranger because he had lost me in a crowd. Since I stopped growing in 4th grade, it happens a lot and for whatever reason people almost never think to just turn in a circle and look down. I'm often right there, just lower than your normal line of sight - so I've heard people describe me about a zillion times. I'm a big girl, so I've heard about 150 million totally unoriginal people attempt to use my size to insult me like it was going to be some huge revelation and I didn't wake up in the morning with all this. I had just never heard it from my father before.
Overall it's not the worst thing in the world. It wasn't even meant as an insult in the way he said it. He described me as "short, fat, curly hair, big eyes, cute as sh!t." Tons of people have called me worse - and heard others say worse about them. One Reddit user asked:
Whats the most hurtful thing you've overheard about yourself by accident?
Here are some of the best (worst?) responses we found, edited for language or clarity where needed. If you're a sensitive type, now might be a good time to grab some comfort food or hug a dog or something. Brace yourselves, folks. It's about to get REALLY harsh in here.
Like, this level harsh.:
With Friends Like This...
My wife had a falling out with some friends of mine that she met through me. We had known them a long time but I had known them for much longer. I was upset with her one night, because they were always asking why she never came around anymore, but she absolutely refused to see them. I always thought it was because of this little side business project they went into together that didn't work out.
So I'm driving my wife somewhere, and I just start getting upset with her that she won't make up with them and move past it like they did, and it sucks that she never comes with when I go over there. So she finally broke and told me the truth.
Every time she went over there without me, they would talk sh!t about me, putting down my personality, my humor, and much more. I guess they thought she would be ok with it, like a joking "haha my husband can be such a [insert something], right?" But she wasn't ok with it. She's not a confrontational person, so she never really spoke up, but she was disgusted by the way they spoke about me behind my back, and refused to have anything to do with them. She had been letting me think it was all her fault and she took it because she knew the truth would hurt my feelings. And it did.
SO Annoying
It boggles my mind to still be thinking about this nearly three decades later. At a goodbye sleepover for my best friend who was moving out of the country, I overheard her saying to another girl, "ugh, she is being SO annoying tonight. I can't wait to leave." The other girl agreed enthusiastically. They thought I was asleep. I cried silently for an hour.
- vbl1776
Never Been Loved
Went out to a bar with some friends for a birthday party for my ex-girlfriend. She really messed me up when she left me, like really bad, but I was trying to be nice since she invited me so I figured I'd go out and be there for a drink or two.
A mutual friend who had gotten dumped a few days before and was there, so as I made the rounds I talked to her and tried to do whatever I could to let her know it would be ok. I'm no therapist, but I did my best ya know? I knew what a bad breakup felt like, as I was also going through one, so I tried to help.
Anyways, after I left the table I overheard her talking to my ex at the bar about me trying to give her advice and she said, "Well nobody has ever loved him so what does he know about any of this?" And they started laughing. Don't think they know I heard, but I grabbed my coat immediately and took a long walk home.
I don't need people like that in my life, haven't willingly seen either of them since.
No Laughing Matter
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When I was in middle school art class something funny happened and I let out a loud laugh. I then overheard one of my childhood best friends whisper to another person "God I hate their laugh." I immediately looked at him and said "What?" And he just looked down at the table like he didn't hear me.
This actually made me change my laugh. It's completely different from what it used to be.
The Wrong Sister Died
When my oldest sister died, my other sister was crying to my mother about how she felt alone. My mother was trying to reassure her and said, "You still have [my name] though." But my sister said, "Who cares about her? I want [oldest sister] back."
I kinda get it... but this was around the same time my mother told me to my face that it should have been me who died instead because I don't have a husband or kids like my oldest sister did. It seemed like absolutely no one wanted me in my family and they all wished I could have switched places with the one we lost.
People wonder why I'm depressed now...
Christmas Eve Confessions
Background: I'm 12 years younger than my older sisters and I was unplanned. At age 7, I overheard my mom crying and saying I was the reason she didn't love my dad anymore/we were poor/why she isn't happy and that she didn't want to be a mom anymore. She said she 'didn't know how to love someone who ruined her entire life'.
It was Christmas eve and she was drunk talking to her best friend on the phone. It broke my heart/spirit and that was only the beginning of my awful childhood. Side note: I'm 29 now and moved out when I was 15 to protect myself. I have no contact with my parents & I'm fully aware it wasn't my fault I was born.... But damn, this memory still f*cks me up...
Roaches And Lice
I was 7 and basically poor trailer trash, but I asked my friend if I could stay the night. He called his mom to ask and I over heard her say "Tell him no, I don't want roaches and lice."
Really cut me deep. To this day I have extreme anxiety about keeping my house clean. I couldn't help it I was poor, and our roaches didn't pay rent!
- Omnicrit
Do You Even Lift, Bro?
I had just finished a phone call and was walking back into the room with a couple of friends. Before I hit the doorway, one of friends asked my then-best-friend why we weren't dating yet. He responded with "I only date girls I can pick up when I'm making out with them." I'm not fat, but I'm not stick thin either, and it has really f*cked me up; I struggle with body image issues to this day.
I later confronted him about it and he told me I shouldn't have eavesdropped. A bunch of other sh!t happened and we aren't close friends anymore, but damn that hurt to hear. Especially from someone I cared about so much.
- Kass_cya
Another Nurse
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'If another nurse had been taking care of him, he'd be alive right now.'
I spent the entire night running around trying to stabilize a patient, and my b!tch of a coworker sat there talking sh!t with my other bitch of a coworker. Those two sat loudly talking about how incompetent I was the entire time. Neither of them lifted a finger to help.
When the patient crashed, both of them magically disappeared and it was nurses from the other side of the hallway who came to help with the code. They came after all was said and done and then I overheard one of them spit out that little gem. When they were asked what happened, they proceeded to tell the unit manager that I was incompetent and crying at the bedside. Thankfully neither of them work on the unit anymore.
The Intern
At my first internship, I overheard one of my supervisors ask the others if I was genuinely mentally handicapped. That hurt.
Yes, she 100% meant what she said, but not in a compassionate way. She not only insulted me, but insulted the undergrad program I came from for sending her someone so "incompetent." Nothing I did or didn't do justified her behavior.
For example, she'd ask my opinion, then laugh in my face when I gave it. Or tell me a meeting was in one room, when it was in another, and snap at me for not being in the right place.
That was 10 years ago. Now I have a few degrees and am happily employed in the same field at a company that values me.
Hideous Thrift Store Clothes
I remember in 7th grade our class did one of those BS award ceremonies (ie. Best hair, best smile, most sociable, etc.) Well I was a wallflower pretty much all the way through high school, never had that many friends or anything. Anyways, to my surprise I had won the award for "Most unique sense of style." I was a bit embarrassed, but hey, at least I had gotten one of the awards! FF to homeroom class after the ceremony, and I overhear a group of kids laughing, saying how funny it was that "the emo b*tch won for her hideous thrift store clothes." What's worse is that I had considered more than one of those people my friends.
- funngus
Math Is Hard
Having my ex wife (married at the time) tell her friends how stupid I was because I couldn't figure out a math problem while going back to try and get my GED (she has a masters degree). It almost caused me to quit the program. But I stuck with it and eventually got it. Wouldn't have bothered me so much except for the fact growing up my teachers always told me I wouldn't amount to anything and would just flip burgers. Well now I'm 2nd in command at my firehouse (Deputy Fire Chief) run a successful side business building decks, and am a lead carpenter for a big construction company.
Painting For The Ex
My ex-boyfriend had an old BMW that he absolutely adored, so, for his birthday I decided I would do a painting of it for him. I spent days carefully drawing it, painting, bought a nice frame for it. When I was finished I sent a picture of it to a group chat with my friends because I was proud of my efforts, without realizing someone had added my boyfriend to the chat earlier. He saw the photo and replied something along the lines of 'hahaha wtf is that retarded thing'....I threw the painting in the trash and never told him.
Shame About Her Face
When I was 12 years old a boy at school, a few years above said: "she has a nice body but it is a shame about her face". It really hurt my confidence at that age.
Plain Bagel
This was years ago but we were in Las Vegas for the weekend. I was in the bathroom getting ready to go out with my boyfriend and his family, mostly cousins. My way of getting ready is shaving my legs, some blush, mascara and eye liner - pretty simple . Maybe if I'm feeling fancy I will even curl my hair a bit. I heard them talking about how they knew I was almost done getting ready because I'm so plain. My boyfriend agreed and added that yes I'm very simple and low maintenance .
I know it doesn't sound like a big stab but it hurt me in the deepest chunk of my heart and soul because he could've elevated the 'plain' or something, but he didn't. He agreed with it. The rest of the night was a blur because I drank so much so I wouldn't keep thinking of the way my boyfriend thought of me as such a plain bagel. We're still together and I've at least added color to my hair and lipstick to my face.
School Shooter Jokes
I once heard my only friends in middle school talking about which kid would shoot up the school. They said that I would be the most likely. They made a lot of school shooter jokes about me after that. I still have paranoia that my friends are just tolerating me.
Mean Girls
Once in 7th grade I had a crush on a guy in my class and my then-best-friend told this to a group of girls she wanted to be friends with. The group hated me for some whatever middle-school-reason. They all started coming up to me here and there and saying things like "He's totally in love with you too, he wants to ask you out tomorrow. He's just too shy;"
I was so happy about it. The next day I was so thrilled and giddy just waiting for it to happen. During the break I overheard a girl from the clique mimicking me how happy I looked and saying that it won't be for long. It turned out that the group was pressuring the guy I liked into faking a relationship with me. He never had a crush on me, the group just wanted to see me embarrassed and heartbroken. Luckily, the guy was honest and told me everything.
Let Him Do It
In the 9th grade, my suicide attempt had gotten around to pretty much everyone. I overheard a girl saying to one of my friends, "Who cares if he kills himself. If he wants to die, let him do it."
The thing was, I didn't WANT to kill myself. I just wanted the thoughts in my head and my crappy feelings to stop. At the time, I thought I had tried everything to help myself and failed.
Funeral Director
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I moved in to a new place. I was incredibly shy but was always trying to make conversation with my roommates. I was very timid.
I heard two of them talking together in the kitchen. They thought I was out of the house so they were discussing what they thought of me.
It hurt so bad when I heard one of them say "She's so f*cking weird. And she's more boring than a funeral director."
Fat Girl's Personality
I've struggled with my weight all my life and finally found a routine I can keep up with without losing faith which has caused me to lose a ton of weight - I overheard my crush tell his friends that even though I've lost the weight, I've still got a "fat girls personality" and he wouldn't date someone with "saggy weight-loss-tits" and they all laughed and nodded in agreement - that hurt