People Confess The Weirdest Things They've Seen In Strip Clubs
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People looking for a debaucherous night out need to look no further than their local strip joint, where anything can go down. Anything.

And while connoisseurs may claim to have "seen it all" there are always a handful of patrons who can claim boasting rights witnessing things that aren't typically on the visual feast buffet.
What can possibly top ping pong balls being ejected from unsuspecting places, you say?

You may want to read on and find out the answers Redditor Bartos565 got when they asked:

"What’s the craziest thing you’ve seen in a strip club?"
WARNING: NSFW descriptions ahead

Patrons had their expectations annihilated.

Display Of Character

"On Halloween I saw a stripper dressed up as Patrick (inflatable suit version) grinding on a pole."

– vertigo-1996

Cavity Inspection

"Stripper went all around the stage getting on all fours right in front of a small group and giving them a flashlight. She then spread her cheeks and wanted the guys to aim the flashlight and peer inside of her. It was so weird."

– TheShoot141

Not Everything That Happens In Vegas Stays There

"Glitter gulch in Vegas. Holy sh*t was that place rough. Saw a dancer out of her mind of something crawl to the stage, crawl around said stage, stare at a guy for half a song, then crawl back to wherever she came from."

– theoopst

Different Kind Of Blow Job

"A girl in NO took out her nipple piercings, replaced them with matches, lit the matches and had one of the guys in our group blow them out."

"Holy Tamale I won't forget you lmao"

– Yoshable

These Redditors got the best seat in the house. Because they suddenly found themselves actually becoming the seats to be sat on.

There Goes The Tooth

"The girls dragged my buddy onto stage and sat him on a chair. The biggest girl there slammed her a** down on him so hard his false tooth popped out and they had to turn on the lights and everyone was looking for it. They gave him 2 free shots, one to say sorry and the other to put the tooth in to disinfect it."

– someprickinvietnam

Up Close And Personal

"A stripper asked me if I wanted to see a trick. I said 'sure,' and she proceeded to do a handstand on my knees and booty bounce my face. Pretty sure I got whiplash that night."

– tstrickler14

Are the following theatrics interactive or invasive? You decide.

Scent Of A Woman

"An old guy who was a regular would give big tips just to sniff a dancers a**."

– garyda1

Impressive Feat

"Stripper asked me if I had a problem with feet, and I honestly replied ‘no’ before fully thinking it through. Next thing I know, she’s using her feet to remove my glasses, and place them on her own face. Then she takes them off, and puts them back on me, again using only her feet. She was very polite, and I’m sure someone would have paid big bux for such an opportunity, but it was mostly just surprising to me."

– franklin_1717

A Mouthful

"First time in Tijuana the guy on the sidewalk by the entrance offered my friends and I a free beer just to get us in the door. We went in and sat down."

"Two girls came over and one immediately sat on my lap, the other one was like a translator trying to get me to pay her for a dance."

"I turned to my friend to say something and mid sentence the girl on my lap put her boob in my mouth."

– rickyg_79

Flavor Of The Month

"Not so much the dancers, but the female bartender served a shot called 'the dirty O' it was the bar rail run off that she stirred with her finger, after fingering herself."

– justrees

America's Favorite Cookie

"Not seen, but I did have a black stripper ask me and my then spouse (both white) if we wanted to go in the back and make a reverse oreo."

"Edit: Y’all need to calm down. It was like 1:00 pm on a Tuesday and we had a coupon for free drinks."

"She gave me her card though. Do strippers usually have cards?"

– StelleSenzaDio

The Hottest Performance

"Not sure anyone will see this, but here it goes: I was in a strip club in Portland and the staff started moving chairs further away from the stage. The DJ said no one was allowed within 5ft. The girl came out and started fire dancing. She would light a toy on fire, and put it out. Light her vagina on fire. Put it out. All while dancing sexually. A dude gets up and hands her a dollar. She took it... And lit it on fire! Let it burn into nothing, and keep dancing. She was an absolute gangster."

– Oregon85

Some strip clubs fulfilled all the cravings–including hunger.

Major Convenience

"No joke, they had an Arby’s upstairs. It was beautiful."

"Edit: Quick clarification since so many people seem to want to know where this magical place was. I unfortunately don’t remember the exact address as this was just something my friends and I happened to pass by while going on a road trip back in college and decided to check out if there really is a f'king Arby’s in a strip club. What I do remember is this was somewhere in the Los Angeles area. This was also over 10years ago so there’s a good chance this place doesn’t exist anymore, but if you’re in the SoCal area and feeling adventurous I’d say go for it :)"

– TrinixDMorrison

Meat Everywhere

"The one time I worked in a club that had a steakhouse in half if it was AMAZING. Someone was always buying us food."

– xenowife

It Has Appeal

"She opened a bottle of beer with her vagina. Not a screw top bottle either. It was one you need a proper bottle opener for."

"Then another one shot half a banana across the stage. A few minutes later a little old cleaning lady came passed and swept it into her scoop. She took a couple of steps and then looked at another patron and held up the scoop as if to ask if he wanted to eat it. He declined."

"I'm sure you can guess this happened in Thailand."

– NevetsZA

The first time I got into a strip club while visiting San Francisco, I was both in awe and nervous. Up until that moment, I have never seen so many exposed lady parts in an environment where it was perfectly normal.

I was fourteen.

So when I got kicked out after my older brothers' friends snuck me in, the bunny waitress caused a scene and rightfully cursed us out of the room.

I'm sure seeing a pimpled teen with a Shirley Temple being thrown out was the weirdest spectacle those patrons have ever witnessed at their favorite local hang.

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