Being an exotic dancer is generally not necessarily people's vision for themselves as children, but the financial draw of the job is pretty great.
A person can basically pay tuition with the amount of money they walk away with from working in a club. It's a very lucrative thing. But it also draws a crowd that is rather unusual, as it is an unusual job.
Those unusual crowds can sometimes be hard to deal with.
Reddit user iamiconick asked:
[Serious] Strippers of Reddit. What do you really think of the people that see you perform?
Here were some of those answers.
Magic Consideration
"Was male stripper for a bit. My opinion: it's all types for all reasons. Passing judgement on folks generally just makes you less approachable. There are good folks who like gyrating naked people but are awkward socially and have lots of money. Creepy is still creepy. Considerate is still considerate. Only difference is I'm not wearing pants."
– Crispyandwet
Parallels To Customer Service
"Ex stripper. The guys that came in and knew the deal were great. Tip the girl on stage, get a lap dance, be polite. The worst were the guys that thought they were smarter than the strippers or that they could somehow game us. Like, one guy I remember went on a whole rant about how smart he was because he could tell it was all fake and the girls weren't really attracted to the men. Uh, yeah dude, you're a genius. Or when they think they're funny by degrading the women. It's not funny and you're the one that looks bad. Honestly, for the most part I didn't think about the guys much at all. I was on autopilot most of the time and didn't judge them any more than thinking who looks interested in a private dance or who was a jerk I wanted to avoid."
– kidloca
Rowdy
"You get your share of creeps but mostly where I worked (a long time ago) a lot of young groups of guys just looking for a good time. Every once in a while you have someone who has too good of a time and gets rowdy and acts like an idiot. Granted I only worked 2-3 nights a week, people who dance full time (especially during the day) have a whole different kind of crowd to deal with. But customers are generally all the same, just looking for something to distract them from life for a while. Feels like a lifetime ago that I danced, my husband and I go together now every once in a while to get a private dance for a while and it's way more fun being on the other side."
– pickmeacoolname
Cinnamon Told You Nothing
"Generally depends on what kind of customer that person is really. The best kind is the dude who understands that it is all a game. They tip well, they are sociable and polite, may even be regulars with certain girls and are never a problem. The entire club staff loves guys like this."
"The ones that the dancers hate? The "I don't pay for dances" guy who thinks that line will somehow make him desirable for dancers? His trademark line goes something like "You are too beautiful/smart/amazing to be doing this, if you get with me you can leave this behind".
"The pimps that go around asking the girls if they "Want to make some real money" are real POSes as well. Then there was the ones that I really had a personal dislike for, the dudes who would try and wait in the parking lot at the end of the night because "Cinnamon and I really had a connection you know? She told me to wait for her!" No she didn't buddy, IF Cinnamon told you that, she did so knowing that I would be kicking everybody out of the parking lot before the dancers left for the evening."
"The strip club industry is a weird place."
"Source: Longtime strip club bouncer."
– BigBodyBuzz07
A New Way To Talk
"Ex-stripper here: Of course I encountered all different types, but I am here to mention one type in particular (my favorite). There were a lot of customers who were lonely, or didn't have anyone to talk to who would really listen to them. They figured out that they could come in and pay for company. I would sit at the table with one of my regulars for a few hours and just talk. I made a point of showing that I valued them as a person and was genuinely interested in their conversation. He knew that he was taking up my time, and every so often would hand me another bill. I didn't pity them, I respected them for figuring out a way to engage with other humans and satisfy their need for connection."
– everyonesmomiguess
Chosen Family
"Depends on the person."
"I've had stalkers follow me home. Creeps who tried to get violent with me at work. People who pissed me off."
"I've also met some really wonderful people I'm fine with calling my friends. I just had a baby and invited two ex customers to my baby shower in June."
– aequitasthewolf
Bobs Everywhere
"I used to have a girlfriend who was a stripper, and sometimes I'd visit her at work and hang out with her and her co-worker buddies when it was slow. One time when we were doing this, another stripper sat down with us and said, "Cool, I just got 10 straight lap dances with Bob." I asked, "Which one is Bob?" No one said anything, then one of the girls giggled. My girlfriend said, "Um, Jeremy, they're ALL 'Bob' "
– jeremyharrison415
Logique
"I dated a stripper for a while (no we didn't meet at the club). We were 18. She liked some of her regulars, but she would often get married guys in there and she absolutely hated them (not that she wouldn't take their money) because she wanted to just have fun and not worry about ruining people's marriages. She also disliked the people that were old enough to be her dad because there were a lot of old creepy people who would proceed to show her pictures of their kids who were around her same age."
"In general though as long as people tipped well and didn't make things awkward she seemed to really enjoy most of her clients."
"Also never ask your stripper out, she probably doesn't like you. And also don't propose to them because that makes it super awkward. They're just people, no one proposes to cute girls out of the blue, there's no way to handle that situation that ends well."
– Desblade101
A Fantasy
"As a male, I asked a stripper this same question. She said "it's just a job. It's their fantasy and they pay for it. Some of these guys are lonely. Some have wives/girlfriends at home who don't give them the attention we give them in a 5 minute lap dance in 5 months. Then you have all the others in-between"
– Joe_Da_God
Innocence
"Most of the people there are just coming for a good time. You get your occasional creeps who you're giving a lap dance to and they flat-out try to shove their hands down your front but it's all fine and dandy, there's always a bodyguard just around the corner. The one thing I love about working at my local strip club is the younger ones who are always so shy and timid. I was giving a lap dance to one boy with the cutest little face and he didn't know he was allowed to touch us, so when I took his hands and set them on my behind he started freaking out a little bit by stuttering and saying stuff like "is this allowed?" and "I don't know about this".
– APopeWithACiggar
Simply Them
"I see them as humans and general people. Customers who provide a source of income. Some good, some bad, some decent, some pervy."
– sallyharpersmith
Hygiene Is Important
"Current dancer here 😊 I like most of them as long as they’re respectful and tip well. My favourite customer at the moment likes to come in with rubber gloves on and sanitise everything before he sits down- he books me for an hour and doesn’t want any dancing or to touch me in anyway and says he’s a germophobe who is here for ‘a hygienic chat’ lol"
– tittysandwhich3
The Categories
"Former stripper, I used to do a lot of private work as well as working in clubs. The clientele is pretty much the same at private functions and they’re generally just there for the party, and it varies so much in the club environment. There are so many types of customer, but I’ve put them in 3 general groups."
"The regular weekend crowed and usual private function attendee is pretty boring and predictable. You’re having the same conversation 100 times a night and you get the same proposition from most of them. Most of the time they’re groups of men, but sometimes they’re hens nights and they’re probably worse than men. While these groups were okay for quick money, I didn’t think much of them and my train of thought was usually figuring out how to navigate around them in 8 inch heels and making sure I kept myself safe. Sometimes you get lucky and have a good basket of eggs who can make it a really good night (gay men/women, legitimate decent groups who aren’t wasted by 8pm, country boys), but most of them are too trashed to see past the ends of their noses."
"You also get the people who are there for more than t*ts and a**. With these customers, it all came down to wanting to find a place where you could come in and not be judged. These people have usually been regulars for years and were the kinds of people where it’s safer to drop your guard because they understood what being in a strip club meant. They were my favourites because I didn’t have to be that sexy goddess fantasy, I just had to be someone who listened or give them some physical closeness that they craved and that was generally enough for them. They were great tippers and would always buy you a drink, bring you gifts or food, and be up for a game of pool. Unfortunately these clients are rare so you snap them up while you can."
"Then there are those who don’t fit in either category: Captain Save-A-Ho, the “cool” girlfriend, straight women, the cheap toucher, etc.. These people didn’t regularly come into the club and you don’t really know what you’re going to get until you talk to them. They can be really good and make your night fantastic, or absolutely awful and be the reason you second guess your career choices."
"Unfortunately most clients from the clubs sucked so I just ended up sticking to my regulars and made new regulars chase me for a while before I let them in."
– meliza-xx
Once You Become A Dancer
"As a dancer for many years, I've seen it all haha. I had been a cocktail waitress many years before I started to dance so I knew the basic idea of how things ran in the clubs... I only decided to dance bc at the time I found myself in overwhelming financial issues bc of a legal case where I had to hire a lawyer etc. And dancing was really the only way I could get it quickly."
Even though I had been in the club years before, I still was this naive little lamb at first who def learned the hard way about that industry."
"But I can say now that it does take a desensitized person to do it. And I'd say most dancers someway or another have had some dark experiences in their past when it comes to men, sex, upbringing, abuse, etc... Which makes it easier to take emotions out of the job and lust after the money, the attention, the partying, and the power it can give you."
"In my opinion there are basically 3-4 categories of people who come in."
1. "The young, arrogant, and stingy frat/bachelor party types. They are usually rowdy, obnoxious, and sexually explicit to the girls. They overstep boundaries, get completely shit faced, and have no shame in trying to get girls to after party SMH."
2. "Another type are the lonely, socially awkward, sexually inexperienced guys. These guys are easily seduced by the flattering and physical contact of ogles of pretty girls. This usually puts a big fat target on their backs to be taken to the cleaners by the hustler manipulative dancers. And before they can blink, they're in the private booths and coughing up cash they probably don't have to waste lol. These are the ones seek out underground massage parlors and are members of escort sites I've come to conclude lol."
3. "Then there are the bar fly regulars. They know all the managers, they hug all the dancers, will probably buy dancers a shot or drink, but rarely get dances or tip more than a dollar or two to girls on stage. Most dancers figure that out quickly and just put up with them."
4. "Another type which many dancers avoid, which idk why, are the couple's. To me, couples were alwaysssss a positive and profitable time. I think a lot of dancers assume women who come with their SO are only there to babysit their men and make sure they're "behaving"... Which is far from the truth. First off idk why but couples LOVED me and always sought me out. And I learned that the saying "happy wife happy life" is the golden ticket with them. And as long as I made the female feel important and sexy and my main priority... The guy was more than happy to spend the big bucks haha. It was always a good time and more often than not they would always come back just to see me."
5. "And lastly, there is always the men who you could count on. Usually older with stable jobs, and lives outside of the club. Usually married and wealthy, who mostly came during the week and after their 9-5s, never staying too late as to make it back to their real lives. These men always paid for your time appropriately and sometimes just wanted to sit and talk without dances. It's always nice to have some of them stored away for a rainy day haha.
Besides that I'll say that dancing can ruin you if you become vulnerable to the dark side of it. Substance abuse, vanity, and the lust for money are demons that surround strip clubs. I guess it all depends on the demographic of each club. I was fortunate to have danced at one that was considered upscale so I know the types of people who are in other clubs are worse and better in ways... Anyways that's my two cents... Haha"
– sweaver_fever
Someone To Talk To
"Ex stripper here. There were plenty of different types of guys that came in. My favorite were the respectful ones that just needed someone to talk to. Of course I’ve encountered plenty of assholes working at the club, but the whole last year I danced I really only talked to my regulars who at that point were more like my sugar daddies but with no strings attached. I genuinely enjoyed talking to them and hearing about their lives."
– LilithInTaurus
What an eyeopening read. Do you have similar stories? Please share them below!
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.