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People Explain The Weirdest Thing They've Ever Been Falsely Accused Of

People Explain The Weirdest Thing They've Ever Been Falsely Accused Of
Tim Robberts / Getty Images

Being accused of things you didn't do is annoying and can be infuriating even in the best of situations. Sometimes, though, the thing you're accused of is so ridiculous that you can't even be mad.

For example, I had a group of friends I would chat with online. One day, the elderly father of one of those friends got a phone call from Florida saying the friend was in trouble and needed bail money.

Dad knew it was a scam because he had heard about it on the news and just spoken to his son. Dad brushed it off, but did tell son about it. Son mentioned it to a few of those friends.

One of them decided that *I* must have been behind the scam since I live in Florida - along with like 18.5 million other people, but that's not the point. As far as this person was concerned, it was totally me who tried to scam an old man (who I didn't even know was alive and would have no way to contact) out of some money.

Amazingly they managed to convince a few other people that I was a nefarious phone scammer, too. Extra amazingly, that's not even the strangest thing I've been accused of. Let's not even talk about the Nigerian Illuminati incident...

Reddit user Memerdreemurr_Unrl asked:

What's the weirdest thing you've been falsely accused of?

The responses honestly made us laugh pretty hard in most cases. Some were sad since you can tell mental illness played a roll. All of them were outright odd.

Drug-Free Brownies

A long time ago: In exchange for housing, I took care of my best friend's 2 y/o niece and 3 y/o nephew. One day, their insane mom showed up and insisted that I'd given her children pot brownies - not regular brownies - since they were running all over the place (like children sometimes do.) She even called the cops on me, who confirmed that I gave the kids normal, drug-free brownies. She was admitted to a mental hospital not long after. It was so dramatic.

I took care of them for about another 3 years after (until someone else was awarded custody) and still travel back home to see them when I can. Their mom never showed up again - it's been 7 years now. I also lost both parents to mental issues, no way I could just duck out.

- M31K_

You Can't Fit A Dumpster In An Impala

Giphy

My boyfriend got pulled over by the police in his super tiny Impala car, because apparently some shop owner accused him of trying to steal a whole dumpster with said vehicle.

- LeluWater

We Can't Afford A Coke Habit

Doing drugs every morning before work.

It's called coffee people, I work at the same low paying company as you all. None of us could afford that coke habit.

- Majik9

That's Not How Alcoholism Works

Freshman year of college I had a super sheltered roommate. One Friday, I illegally bought a bottle of vodka, had a shot, thought it was gross, and put it in the freezer. Never drank again the rest of the semester. She accused me of being an alcoholic a month later.

She was ungodly stupid. If I were an alcoholic that bottle of vodka wouldn't have stayed there the entire semester, practically full. She opened the freezer a lot for food, the alcohol was always at the same level. It's unlikely she thought I was replacing the bottle. Unless she thought I drank an entire bottle a day.

- Handmade_Dragon

Hill Letters

Some places in the US have big white letters on the side of the hill to signify the name of the town, the name of local schools, etc. I grew up in between 2 towns like this.

Both of the "hill letter" towns were "cross town rivals" and were always playing (lame) pranks on each other. One time, a bunch of kids from my school went up to the rivals letter and changed it around to their letter. It required hiking up a large hill and rearranging boulders for hours. A couple of the kids were football players and there were about 6 kids doing the work.

Because my car was seen in town, I was accused of doing it. Just me. I wouldn't have even climbed up the hill, let alone spent hours lifting rocks plus this was a task that was literally impossible for a single person.

There are still people that remember it happening and ask if it was me.

- Gekokujo

Rewards Program Identity Theft

I have to ask every customer if they'd like to join our rewards program. It's the retail equivalent of "would you like fries with that?" To complete the enrollment I need a phone number and an email address.

Being accused of trying to steal someone's identity to sell it to the Russians (or some equally paranoid rant) is a dramatic event that happens a handful of times per year.


One lady went on a fifteen minute rampage about how she doesn't trust anyone with her phone number because banking can be done over the phone and she never knows when she'll be tapped, etc. Then she has the nerve to go off on me because she's not getting any reward coupons...

Once in a while I'll drop the hint that they can, in fact, give me a fake number or email and I'll never know, and they look at me dumbfounded like someone just told them Santa Claus isn't real.

- piscimancy

Rural Chinese Stairs

I was staying at my girlfriends hometown in rural China.

Little old lady fell up stairs and she started accusing me of pushing her... I was a good 10 meters away. A security guard saw what happened and he told me to just ignore her and walk away.

- Drpancakes88

I Don't Work Here

Being late for work/skipping out on work by not being in uniform (this was at a grocery store.)

It started with a foreign employee yelling at me in broken English as I entered the store. I understood about 1/3 of what she was saying and tried explaining (in vain) that I didn't work there. Later, when I was doing my shopping she came back and started yelling at me again and started trying to pull me towards the employee area. Luckily I was bigger and stronger so I stood my ground and yelled for help.


Another employee who spoke better English and could communicate with her arrived and I yelled at him about his crazy coworker. The store owner was called in and gave me a gift card for my troubles and a lot of harsh words for the female employee.

I saw the new employee I was presumably mistaken for a few weeks later. I have to admit, we were very similar except for our height, weight, skin tone, hair color, facial hair and race. Anyone could've gotten us mixed up.

- FictionWeavile

Terrorism

Another student in elementary school once accused me of "terrorism" by claiming I blinded her with a so called "weapon I snuck into school."

It was a little light for a diary that would reveal UV ink; I forgot it was in my pocket and took it to school accidentally. I pulled it out because the light was on and this girl across hall starts flailing and saying that I blinded her. I lost recess for a week even though it was just a light, they called it "directed aggression" or something.

- r4zrbl4de

Making It In New York

I had just moved to New York for a job at a mid-size company.

One of my co-workers threw a house party to welcome me and another woman who also just started. (I didn't really know this other woman, she worked in a different department and we only talked once during a benefits orientation thing.) It was a Friday night, and I stayed and partied into the next morning, while the other woman left around 10:30PM or so.


Next Monday morning at work, that woman messages me and says she needs to talk to me immediately. We go to the empty break room downstairs and she is furious. She's doing the red-face/angry crying thing.

"I heard you were talking about me after I left. You were telling everyone that there is no way I can make it in New York. How dare you talk about me behind my back. F*ck. You. I hate drama and I will not let you get me involved in it." (I don't think I'm explaining this well enough, she had veins popping out of her neck, she looked like she wanted to fight me.)

I'm absolutely shocked and confused and I'm looking around the room like that John Travolta GIF.

Giphy

"Are you sure it was me? I have no opinion on your ability to live in New York. I hardly even know your name, to be honest."

That pissed her off more, she cusses at me a bit more, and threatens to report me to HR if I don't stop talking about her behind her back.

The situation kinda worked itself out because it turned out she couldn't in fact "make it" in New York and quit about a week and a half later.

I ended up being good friends with the people who were at the original house party and I asked them about that night, if anyone was talking about her after she left. They all swear that her name was never mentioned and she just made the whole thing up. Friggin crazy.

- PeteIsNeat

Gang Banger

Being a "gang banger" at my old job. What actually happened was a coworker that didn't like me found a box cutter in the staff bathroom. This coworker took it to our department head and said it was definitely mine and she knew that because I was a gang member. Spoiler alert: it wasn't my box cutter. It was the maintenance guy's.

- Satanshonda

"It's A Shank!" 

When I was 13 years old, my friends sister got in an argument with a old lady in McDonald's. My friends 9 year old brother had climbed over the booth to get to his seat, as kids sometimes do. The lady yelled at us that we all belong in a zoo and then called the cops.

The police showed up and accused me of being a local gangbanger with the moniker "Lil Joker."


This wasn't even in my city. I'm definitely not a gangbanger and I have no idea who "Lil Joker" is. The fact that I wasn't from that city wasn't enough for the cops. They then searched our car and came out with a small phillips head screw driver. When I say small i mean TINY. It was the ones used for tightening the screws on a pair of glasses.

The cops came out aggressively shouting "What is this?!?!?" We told them it was a screw driver.

"Its a shank!" was their response. All in all a pretty ridiculous interaction with the police when I was a kid.

- Handofthelemur

weird

People Who Witnessed A Teacher Break Down In Tears Share Their Experiences

Reddit user throwthrowwthrowwww asked: 'Students who've witnessed their teacher cry during class, what happened?'

Apple on a stack of textbooks
Element5 Digital/Unsplash

Teachers are not only educators, they're also inspiring leaders.

The most memorable teachers are those who genuinely encourage young students to do their best so they can be empowered to pursue their dreams.

However, we tend to revere them to such a degree, we forget that they're people too with real emotions.

Curious to hear from strangers who witnessed a vulnerable moment from someone they were inspired by at an early age, Redditor throwthrowwthrowwww asked:

"Students who've witnessed their teacher cry during class, what happened?"

There's no bigger heartbreak than people who are struggling with illnesses or know of someone facing medical challenges.

Ailing Teacher

"One of our music instructors 7th-12th grade. She had a long ongoing battle with stage three/four cancer. She always did her best to try to have fun during our classes, like it was an escape for her because she loved music so much. Over 85% of the entire high school joined choir because of her. Her chemo and radiation treatments left her exhausted some days, though, and she would occasionally break down. In 2012, when her condition worsened, she would have to take more days off because the cancer had become so debilitating."

"We continued to practice our songs while she was gone, and I swear we would sometimes spend an hour on one small section of a song, ripping every note apart, and repeating the same words over and over until we couldn't mess it up. One of the final days in class with her, I remember we were rehearsing for our upcoming state competition, and we sounded damn good. Mid-song, she stopped conducting, closed her eyes, folded her hands, and listened as we continued singing for her. The energy and sound was so profound throughout the room, I can't find the words to describe it."

"After the song finished, we stood in a long, complete silence before she opened her eyes with tears streaming down her face. She wasn't able to go to our state competition with us, but we ended up placing that year. It wasn't first like we were hoping, but it was the highest the school had ever placed. She later passed away that same year. She was one of the strongest women I had ever met in my life."

– Top-Box2372

Losing A Student

"My high school Spanish teacher also taught some homebound students with medical issues."

"One day the vice principal came into our class and told Ms J that one of her homebound students had passed away from his cancer. She couldn't hold back the tears."

– que_he_hecho

Wise Toddler

"I’m a teacher, I cried in front of my toddlers when I got a call from the hospital telling me it was time to make the call as to whether to pull my dads life support. One of my toddlers came up to me while I was crying, put her hand on my cheek and said 'it’s ok to feel sad, it’s ok to cry,' then gave me a hug. I love my job."

– Cheekygirl97

Students witnessed the following teachers get emotional.

Thoughtful Sixth-Graders

"The class surprised him on teacher appreciation day. Someone brought pop, snacks etc. He was surprised. 6th grade teacher."

– Stephlynn1234

Appreciation Day

"Had a philosophy course in uni during covid. So the class was held on zoom. It wasn't teacher appreciation day, but it was the second to last lecture of the term and we all really enjoyed this prof (and because of him most of the class became friends). So we organized an appreciation thing for him."

"We all started class without our cameras on, which was unusual and made him question (he got sad actually). So one girl said 'before we start, we just really wanted to do something for YOU because you've done so much for us. I hope this is okay.' He gave us a confused look, and before he could say anything in response we all turned our cameras on and held up signs saying 'thank you professor [name]' and our green screen backgrounds were of his face lol. He laughed so hard but started crying. Told us how he wished we could do this in person and that he genuinely cared about all of us."

"He had a lot of health issues, the most prominent one being MS. Whenever he didn't start class on time we all got worried, and there were a few times where he cancelled altogether because he fell or something. He also had a cat, and we asked to see him just enough times that his cat learned what time our class was at and would climb up to see us and stay the whole class. It was cute. During the breaks he would email a link to play chess since he lived far from his family and couldn't visit and wanted the company. We organized a Christmas movie day with him over the Christmas break and he loved it. He retired after the following year because of his health, and I still wonder what he's doing now and if he's doing okay. I've been in uni for 5 years now and he is the only prof I've actually spoken to consistently and genuinely liked."

– Burnt_Your_Toast

Sad Literature

"5th grade teacher reading Where the Red Fern Grows out loud to the class. He shed some tears. He did every year."

– SnoBunny1982

"Our teacher read that book to us in 5th grade also. But when it got to that part, she elected me to read it and she left the room. Luckily I had read it before and knew what was coming, but it was still rough."

– MIBariSax81

The Private Life Of An English Teacher

"I forgot his name, but he was one of my favored teachers in high school. He taught English."

"During class, he was called out to talk to some members of the school administration and a few proctors. It took several minutes. But he returned, taught as much of the class as he could, and then just walked over to his desk and started crying. Whimpering. He then left."

"He just found out his wife, who had also been a teacher, was having an affair with one of the female students. We didn't find out that specific fact until later on though."

– Typical_Samaritan

Some students, however, can force a teacher to realize they're in the wrong profession.

Bad Attitude

"Student that had behavior issues and a hard time maintaining emotional regulation threw his recorder (the instrument) at the music teacher and it snapped in half. He then threw his desk in her direction and walked out. This was 3rd grade, and all she had asked him to do was listen to the song we were learning. She quit the next week after almost 30 years of teaching."

– Last_Tuesdays_Beans

Bullying The Substitute

"Ms. Hanlon... Substitute teacher, I still think about her and hope she's doing well. She was posted as the teacher when the usual teachers were off sick. Absolutely zero respect was given to her and the class knew if we had Ms. Hanlon it was just an extended lunch, we could just mess around and act like animals for the whole lesson."

"She had physical conditions like a dent in her forehead and a gravvely voice which prevented her from being able to raise her voice to tell us to be quiet. So the kids would all do Hunchback of Notre Dame impressions, spitballs through straws and do the 'coughing game' where they would just cough through whatever she was trying to say."

"Even as a kid I felt kinda awful after we'd essentially broken her and she'd just come in not even say hello and pull open a book for the hour and sometimes cry into it. I weirdly still think about her randomly once or twice a month, I hope she moved on to way better things. School children really have no filter at all."

– PNCL

Absolutely Zero Respect

"Substitute teacher in Jr High must be among the world's worse jobs. 8th grade we had a sub that demanded and got no respect. Kids would throw stuff at her etc. She left the classroom crying then the vice principal, who was not to be messed with, came in and took over."

– woolash

Major Mockery

"I had a substitute teacher named Mr. Crane who looked exactly like Ichabod Crane from the old cartoon. Some kids in the class bullied him relentlessly for this and he just kind of broke down one day. Poor guy."

– backflip10019

In seventh grade, I witnessed a classmate talk back to our homeroom teacher and saying very inappropriate, bullish things to her in front of the whole class.

But that didn't make her cry.

What made her tear up was when another student defended her and yelled at the bullying student for being out of line.

teachers

People Divulge The Dumbest Reasons Their Friends Ever Ended Up On The News

man in black crew neck shirt
Amanna Avena on Unsplash

It can be a pleasant and exciting surprise to see a friend or family member show up on the evening news.

Particularly if it is a story showcasing their accomplishments or allowing them to let their voice be heard on an important issue.

Of course, showing up on the news isn't always a joyous occasion.

Indeed, some people tune in to find their friends and family on the news for reasons they might hope people will eventually forget down the line.

Redditor Miguenzo was eager to hear stories of a loved one making the evening news for less than brag-worthy stories, leading them to ask:

"What’s the dumbest reason somebody you know landed on the 6 o’clock news?"

15 Minutes, Or Four Seconds, Of Fame...

"Years back, there was a college scholarship scam going on here."

"These companies would go to high schools and do a presentation, and grift parents into paying a large sum for the company to help get a scholarship."

"My mom took one look at this and was like, 'this is a scam'."

"My uncle bought it hook, line and sinker and paid up."

"And received absolutely nothing."

"So he calls our news program and they do a feature with this company in their 'hall of shame.'"

"My uncle was absolutely THRILLED."

"'They interviewed me for 4 hours!'"

"'It's going to be huge!'"

"We all sit around the TV."

"It's February 2000."

"Boom, there's my uncle!"

"They do the lead-in..and then, there's my uncle saying..."

"'They said, uh, sue 'em'."

"My uncle is screaming."

"'What the Hell?! They were at my house for 4 hours!'"

"We still have it on VHS somewhere."

"My uncle's star moment over in seconds."- JKW1988

Episode 19 News GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy

Preserved For Posterity...

"My college roommate got stuck in an infant swing at a public park and firefighters had to use some type of Jaws of Life contraption to cut the swing down and cut her out of it."- Nocomt

Oops!

"I know a guy who was interviewed on camera up in the mountains where there was a forest fire."

"He had been up there fishing with his girlfriend."

"He was married."- Fezig

Close Call

"Dude was swimming laps in a lake after dinner (i.e., around sunset)."

"Predictably, he got bit by an alligator."

"I saw him on the news, shirtless in true Floridaman fashion, with a little bandage over each tooth mark."

"The bandages made a dotted line around his shoulder and chest in the shape of an alligator's mouth, like he was in a cartoon or something."- BigRedRobotNinja

Tiere Bis Unters Dach Swimming GIF by SWR KindernetzGiphy

Unpaid Extra

"There was a park nearby that had no drainage and was bowl shaped."

"So if it rained hard, this baseball park/ football field turned into a mini lake."

"It rained a lot one day and the news did a story just showing how much it rained, and in the background behind the news-woman, from out of frame you see my friend rowing past her in a kayak."- hook_killed_pan

Right Place At The Right Time?

"A fight broke out at a HS football game."

"Turned into a huge brouhaha.'

"They intervened this dumba** friend of mine on the local news, the only bit that made it into the broadcast was him saying 'For the first time in my life I was happy to see cops!'"- KneeDragr

Awww...

"Marrying their pet goldfish in an underwater ceremony, complete with a wedding gown and guests in scuba gear."- Candies-For-You

Illustration Swimming GIF by Ordinary NadeeGiphy

Strike!

'A childhood friend’s dad embezzled money from the local Little League team."- Key-Zebra-4125

How Did He Even Make It To The Freezer?

"An ex boyfriend of my best friend’s sister ended up on the news for breaking into a Checkers through the drive through window and locking himself in the freezer until the cops arrived and arrested him."- pineapple3712·

Ice Cream Snack GIF by My/Mochi Ice CreamGiphy

Setting An Example...

"I got filmed and aired sticking a swab up my nose at drive thru covid testing."

"I had just declined to be interviewed at my car because I was afraid of getting someone sick."

"Test was negative, and my sister got a new pic for my contact profile on her phone."- idiotsavant419

Criminals Don't Ususally Wait In The Check Out Line...

"My friend was going to target with his mom to buy a tv."

"They stopped at Starbucks in the store."

"When the worker asked what the wanted he said “'he money in the register see' like an old timey gangster, then laughed ordered and payed for their coffee and went into target."

"While they were pushing their cart with a tv in it to the check out line the swat team surrounded them and arrested him for armed robbery.. was on the news."

"Got charged and everything."

"The first hearing the barista could not point him out and the judge threw out the case."- MACHOmanJITSU

Returning To The Scene Of The Crime...

"A guy from my high school stole Michael Jackson's glove from the Motown Museum in Detroit MI in early 90s."

"He returned it."

"I knew it had to be him, and yep, it was."

"I remembered him because he dressed like Michael Jackson every single day of school for years."

"He did it really well, too."

"He also didn't talk much."

"So, I was surprised to see him talking to a TV reporter about it."

"I hope he's doing well."- ATK80k

Animated GIFGiphy

Some people crave their 15 minutes of fame and embrace it however it may come.

Others only hope that no one they knew happened to be watching their local news that night...

Even though they know deep down that all their friends have it on their DVR and are never planning to erase it...


evening news

Men Break Down The Weirdest Things Someone's Ever Said To Them After Sex

white pillows and bed comforter
Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash

People say the darndest things after -- and sometimes during -- lovemaking.

Maybe it's the euphoria.

Maybe it's the adrenaline.

Maybe it's the tequila.

It's always good to have a kind-hearted joke on hand or a generic compliment.

Or maybe just grab your belongings and skedaddle.

Redditor ella-es-julia wanted to hear about the craziest pillow talk stories, so they asked:

"Men of Reddit: What's the weirdest thing a girl said to you after sex?"

The weirdest I ever got was... "What city am I in again?"

Geography matters.

Morbid Much?

In Bed Home GIFGiphy

"Met girl, went on date, brought girl home, had the sex, finished the sex, laying there she says 'What would you do if I died right now?' and demanded an actual answer."

Vixxay

Meow

"Not to me, but as she walked over to the bathroom after the deed, she said 'I just did your owner' to my cat. Sexiest thing that ever happened to me."

shlanky369

"My Fiancé and I were about to start going at it when the cat appeared from under the bed and stared at me. I went, 'Babe the cat is here. I don't like how he's staring at my boobs."

"Fiancé grabbed the cat and yeeted him into the hallway with the phrase, 'Get out you weird pervert.'"

"The cat proceeded to (without his claws) smack the door over and over again while screaming for a few minutes straight. Pervert."

Trumpet6789

POP!

"'I need you to take me to the hospital. Something is now bleeding and hurts.'"

"Turns out her ovarian cyst popped. We're still together with the running joke of sex so good it put her in the ER."

DasBatt

"Ah ah ah, 2 hemorrhagic cysts ruptured, I was bleeding internally, but only a little bit. I'm still impressed by how quickly you went from a naked sex stupor to being ready and carrying me to the car. Good times."

"In the ER when they asked me what happened all I could do was shout 'we were f**kin!' through my tears. That memory still makes me laugh."

Straystar-626

Damn it's Good

"We were going at it for some time then her face went instantly from 'damn it's good' to full-on crying. I stop, ask her what's wrong and she tells me 'I can't cheat on my boyfriend, it is wrong.'"

"So this is when I learned that the girl that I met on a dating website and that I started seeing 3 weeks before and that she told me she was single had a boyfriend for over 5 years. Got her to talk more, and she told me she was on the dating website to see if there were guys better than her boyfriend so she could end up with someone better."

"This was like 20 years ago, a coworker I have right now knows her (his girlfriend is like a distant relative of hers) and I learned she had 5 different boyfriends since then, cheated on all of them except the last one (for now). She was also a cam model in secret, one of the boyfriends was a high-paying customer."

draftstone

A Binding Contract

"'Pleasure doing sex business with ya.' We then shook hands."

"Still together 5 years later!"

Tatarstan

It's nice when people who have great sex make great partners.

And it all starts with a handshake.

Sleep on It

“'I don’t usually say this but, yeah, you can stay.'"

lennyukdeejay

"Did you high-five after that? Seems like that statement called for it."

EvilNinjaX24

"This is the best one."

TomKhatacourtmayfind

Tiny Dancer

"Not really weird but I slept with this girl while backpacking Asia, she was also a backpacker. After a bit of chillin'/talking, I got up to get dressed, she looked at my flaccid manhood and said 'You're quite shy when you're not excited.' I thought it was hilarious."

fleetwoodsackk

"That's a much better way to put it. My wife, when we were just dating and had moved in together and eventually saw it flaccid just said 'Aww, it's so little.' Thanks, hun, exactly what every guy wants to hear."

striker180

Fine!

"She said 'If I get pregnant I'm keeping it.' I was dumbfounded and when I didn't respond quickly enough she got really agitated like I had hurt her feelings and yelled 'Fine! You don't have to be involved if you don't want to!'"

"We had just met that night. My condom use skyrocketed after that night."

Fullyme

"When I was a poverty-stricken college student I was banging a girl who said, 'If you get me pregnant I’ll take you for everything you own.' I said, 'All I own is my bicycle. You want that?'”

OrwellWasRight101

Amen

"Best weird compliment I ever got was 'Damn boy, you f**k like the Devil!'"

"I married her, we still goin' at it."

BeBearAwareOK

Well, these certainly created some lasting relationships... or hilarious tales to tell their friends.

Do you have any stories to share? Let us know in the comments below.

sex

The Absolute Weirdest Compliments People Have Ever Received

woman in black pants and red tank top
Jakayla Toney on Unsplash

Giving compliments is pretty easy, although most of us don't do it often enough.

Accepting compliments can be much harder.

Too many of us immediately shift into disclaimers to explain why we don't deserve the praise.

But we just need to say thank you—even if the compliment is a little odd.

Keep reading...Show less
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