People Who Sleep Naked Describe The Times It's Backfired On Them

People Who Sleep Naked Describe The Times It's Backfired On Them
Image by Dieter Robbins from Pixabay

Sleeping puts you in a vulnerable position. You're laying down, muscles are relaxed, the room is dark, and if you wake up you're mind will be the furthest thing from sharp.

But some people are out there leaning into the that vulnerability. They heap on one extra pivotal variable: they do it completely naked.


The nude sleep maneuver is a polarizing concept. Many simply could not imagine doing it. These naysayers sight body temperature, itchiness, and a general psychological feeling of exposure.

But the pro-nuders couldn't be more confident about their decision. They enjoy the comfort, the absence of any fabric entanglements, and the primal sense of freedom.

That is, until their nighttime nakedness leaves them a sitting duck for a midnight catastrophe.

CosmoPeter asked, "People who sleep naked, when has it backfired?"

Pants-less, for Noodle's Sake

"Not me but I was spending the night at my friends house in a suburban neighborhood."

"In the middle of the night his Mom had let their toy fox terrier out to go pee and it got snatch by a coyote. She screamed and woke us all up 'A WOLF GOT NOODLE!'"

"Within 10 seconds his Dad was sprinting out of the house completely butt naked with a Glock in his hand and went running down the street."

"Came back about 15 minutes later WITH THE DOG and obviously still completely naked."

-- datacollect_ct

Rise and--AHHHHHHHHH!

"There was one morning in high school when my dad decided to wake me up for school by ripping the covers off me in bed."

"That was the last time that happened."

-- Hrekires

Not a Drill

"I had a closet-sized single dorm room and people would always pull the fire alarm in the middle of the night and we'd all have to go outside."

"One time I was so drowsy I just walked out instinctively and half way down the hall I raced back. Thankfully this was an old building so I didn't get locked out of the room."

-- iBelieveInSpace

Clawed in the Night 

"I used to sleep naked. Now I own a cat. Those two overlapped for only a week." -- Peace-out56

"I feel this on a deep level. Got a kitten. Got my nipples bitten while sleeping. Started wearing clothes to bed." -- barelydecentenough

A Super Power

"Never. Chased a burglar down the stairs, thru the kitchen and out my front door without wearing a shred of clothing and no weapon in hand."

"The power of nakedness."

-- This-is-a-pitcher

A Nude Pilgrimage 

"I locked myself out of my flat whilst sleep-walking once."

"My girlfriend was on holidays so I had to wait until morning, borrow a towel off a neighbour and then walk about a mile up the road to the estate agent to get a spare key."

-- AllISaidWasJehovah

The Price of Freedom 

"I normally don't do this, but one summer night I had a meal from my local Mexican place that I love."

"Since I was busy that day, I didn't have lunch and decided to get significantly more than what I normally order to cure the hangry."

"I also did not get an opportunity to poop that day. Since it was unusually hot that night I decided to ditch everything and sleep bare. After one very realistic dream of me on the toilet..."

"Let's just say that I had to get a new set a bed sheets the next morning."

-- Coneth_Madness

When the World Isn't Ready 

"I started somewhere in high school because of night sweats. In college I moved into an on-campus apartment- alone- and the very next morning I woke up to 3 grown mid-50s dudes with their faces in my window."

"My bed was directly below the window."

"University Housing gave some BS excuse about my window needing 'maintenance'. Just my window specifically. None of the others in the entire complex."

"The window wasn't even designed to open."

-- Lady_DreadStar

A Lifelong Secret

"I've always slept naked but the heater in my room was broken and it was getting too cold even with layers of blanket."

"I woke up that morning and knew I had the house to myself at least till late afternoon so I continued snoozing in my sister's room with the heater on."

"Next thing I knew, I heard voices coming up the stairs. It was my sister and her friends. I guess they decided to ditch school and thought I wasn't home."

"I had no other choice but to roll over and hide under the bed. They were hanging out in that room for a good 2 hours and I was under the bed completely naked the whole time."

"That was almost 15 years ago and she still has no idea."

-- BreakfastCheesecake

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