Have you ever watched an ad and thought “wow that's just what I need!"? I have. Show me any type of time-saver, miracle device and I'm ready to give up my money. Unfortunately, none of these uni-taskers hold up in our busy house. Miracle stain remover? Still stained. All in one stick vacuum? Works great except it plugs up at least twice per use requiring full disassembly. Magic skincare? Burned my cheeks red.
Thankfully, it's not just us with bad luck. When Redditor jab116 asked “What is the most overrated product you've purchased?" people were glad to share all the times they'd been duped by clever marketing.
Biggest lie of the millennial childhood...not capitalism, the other one...
lil yachty kyle GIF by stalebagel
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Sea Monkeys. When I was little, I ordered some from the back of a comic book. I thought they would look like the picture, a nuclear family who would interact and talk to me. Unfortunately, they were turned out to be very nonsentient brine shrimp. It was very anticlimactic.”
“The caked on makeup just isn't necessary...”
“Jeffery stars liquid lipstick. It dried the sh*t outta my lips and felt Hella uncomfortable. I only wore it once. It was so hyped up a couple years ago. Also tarte eyeshadow pallets are acceptable for the price. I bought a couple and was like....eh. I just buy colourpop now.”
“Also any foundation feels bad on my skin. I have spent hundreds on so many different foundations. Beauty filters on YouTube need to stop.”
“I don't wear foundation now. The caked on makeup just isn't necessary for 90% of people, and is a way to sell way too much makeup by making you feel bad about how your skin looks, with texture etc.”
“...had to nearly rip my nipple off to get the bra off of me.”
“Anyone remember those sticky cup strapless-backless bras? The ads were all over Facebook and Instagram for a while. I eventually gave in and bought one.”
“The whole point of them in the ads was like pull the string in the middle to give yourself instant mega cleavage, and you can wear it under strapless/ backless clothes. Unfortunately, pulling your boobs together into ultra mega cleavage just means it makes the volume of your boobs flatter to pull them closer together, and since all it had was skin to stick to, and nothing but stickiness to hold it up, it was not very supportive.”
“It was sticky enough for one proper use, but even still, the edges peeled away from my skin pretty quickly. There is a little cutout in the middle that's not sticky. That's where the nipple is meant to go.”
“My nipples did not naturally or comfortably line up with those holes, so I had this incredibly sticky bra suction cupped to my tit, and had to nearly rip my nipple off to get the bra off of me.”
“After that, it is impossible to wash and store anywhere. The sticky surface becomes slick when wet, but goes back to sticky when it gets dry (but never as sticky as the first time).”
“It has to air dry because towel fibres will get stuck on it, and it wouldn't survive a trip through the washer and dryer. It cannot be stored in a drawer, or touching any material because fibres will get stuck on it, and it cannot be stored face up with nothing covering it because dust will get stuck on it, thereby rendering it un-sticky until you wash it again, and air dry it again, and store it wrong again, rinse and repeat until you throw it in the garbage.”
It wasn’t any better for the next person...
#teamscorpion dancing GIF by CBS
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“I wore one clubbing once and let me tell you, worst decision ever. One minute I'm dancing on a podium with a couple of friends, then I just feel it unstick all at once and drop out the bottom of my dress.”
“I subtly kick it off the podium hoping nobody noticed and then 30 seconds later I turn around to a group of 18 year old guys holding it up to their chests and dancing, absolutely losing it. Thankfully I don't think they knew it was mine.”
Are they still around?
“Sears ‘best"’canister vacuum cleaner. It was expensive, but lasted a few days over one year and quit (with only light household use).”
“Sears wouldn't stand behind it. The cost of parts and repair was greater than the cost of the vacuum cleaner. No wonder Sears is in trouble.”
People Explain The Worst Thing That's Ever Happened To Them On Their Birthday
“Your house will smell like sh*t.”
“Cloth diapers. My god some of these parents have to stop raving about how amazing cloth diapers are. They are at best an ok alternative to disposable diapers."
“Things I was told about cloth diapers. Less blowouts, less rashes, better for the environment, cheaper. Most of these just depend on your child. And honestly I found most of these false."
“Things they don't tell you. Your house will smell like sh*t. You will constantly be doing laundry. When you're out of the house you'll be carrying around a dirty diaper. If the baby hates being wet you'll constantly be changing them. Daycares don't take them. Babysitters hate them. Diaper changes take way longer!"
“More power to any parent who uses. Like seriously god bless you. But they have some major downsides and I'll happily take Pampers over cloth."
Kinky.
Hose Clog GIF by DrSquatchSoapCo
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“A garden hose that was ‘unkinkable’, I paid extra for the guaranteed kink free feature. It kinked up like a motherfugger.”
Not always a great investment...
“Nearly everything i bought on Kickstarter/Indiegogo. if i got the product at all, they're almost always low quality and don't do what they said they would. some products would ship but the company goes under within a year or two so no more support or replacement parts.“
Nearly finished him!
“When I was around 9, I got really convinced by their $5m marketing campaign with Mortal Kombat that the Aura Interactor was going to be awesome. It was basically a haptic feedback backpack that converted bass sounds to rumbles and was supposed to make video games super immersive.”
“I was actually nervous that it was going to hurt me, like actually feel like I was being punched. I (somehow) convinced my mom to buy it, set the thing up, and ten minutes later I smelled smoke and then saw the smoke coming from the Interactor on my back.”
Why didn't I know this as a broke college student!?
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“Most of my academic books. All the pdfs are available online“
“Coach refused to fix it...”
“Coach handbag. The strap broke after a few months and Coach refused to fix it (after I brought it back and the receipt to the store where I had purchased it). I bought an inexpensive replacement strap that lasted longer. After less than a year, there was evident wear at the seams. I have not purchased anything from Coach again.“
Pay-to-win MMOs!
“ArcheAge. I remember it being marketed as "sandbox MMO with realistic player-driven economy". There was a pack that let you into alpha, a pack that let you into beta, and a pack that let you into few days of early access.”
“All of the packs contained nothing but some cosmetic items irrelevant to the economy. The alpha was good. The beta was good. But with the final release, they fired up the cash store with such extreme pay-to-win...”
You mean infomercials lied to us?
“I bought the slap chop, pure garbage. It literally exploded upon use as directed. No flames or anything, but all the parts came apart and went flying."
“I saw the commercials for it once and got all excited telling my SO about it. She, the person that actually cooks, informed me that you still had to cut everything small enough to fit in the thing plus that you now have a bunch more sh!t to clean after you're done cutting vegetables."
.lAnd now you're telling me there's also shrapnel to worry about. Good thing I didn't buy it."
About the grossest thing on this thread.
“Ear Wax candles. After laying on the floor like an idiot with a flaming burning candle in my ear, I took a minute to actually think about the process...fools gold.”
“I had to return the first one I bought...”
“I bought a platform bed on the recommendation of the Wirecutter. They had this whole big spiel about how they test sh*t, this is the best affordable option, blah blah blah. I had to return the first one I bought because it came scratched up.”
“The second one is just a plain, cheap platform bed. I don't think there's anything about it different from what I could have gotten from just hunting down the cheapest version of the product.”
“An ‘indestructible’ dog bed. Even claimed it could withstand bulldogs. Well, my bulldog tore out the rod that propped it open, which turned out to be flimsy plastic. Within a week, she had torn off a zipper, and ripped the filling out. I was more angry at the company for making such false claims than my under one year old dog.”
“Cable TV. More of a service than a product. Spent the past 5 years without it. Had it for 2 months and there is nothing worth watching.“
“I had cable tv for a couple of years. Then I'd turn on the TV and within 5 seconds I recognize the episode as one I'd already seen which, of course, is followed up over the next few hours with ones I'd already seen. Travel channel isn't even about travel anymore and there are a lot of shows on Animal Planet that aren't even about animals. It is like every channel specialized and then changed direction.”
Should have known not to trust that guy...
My Pillow Snl GIF by Saturday Night Live
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“My Pillow. It's the worst pillow I've ever used, it is a cotton bag of these foam tetris type blocks, there are 3 levels of firmness based on how many blocks the pillow has. I ordered the firmest level and the pillow was like 1/3 full. It was a totally useless pillow.”
“The return process requires an RMA and they take 20% or something for "restocking". So obviously that's their business plan, sell a cheap overpriced product w heavy advertising, make it hard to return so most people don't bother and charge a restocking fee even if they do return it.”
The most useless of them all...
Dumpster Fire GIF by MOODMAN
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“I bought my first planner ever in January 2020. I was going to start school again and thought ‘yea I'll get a planner to really get my life together’. Little did I know the universe had other plans so now it's just a book full of scribbled out meetings and cancelled conferences.”
A great rule of thumb—if it sounds too good to be true it probably is.
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The old wives' tales.
They are the stories of legend.
I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.
Where did they originate?
WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!
You don't hear about them as much anymore.
It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.
But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.
Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:
"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"
"Wait an hour to swim after eating."
What a crock!
So many summer hours wasted.
I want revenge for that one.
Say Nothing
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"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."
LonelyMail5115
"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."
I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Say Something
"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."
Severe_Airport1426
"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."
crappycurtains
"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."
AlbinoShavedGorilla
Body Temps
"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."
chriseo22
"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."
"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."
apocalypticradish
Arms Down
"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."
Fatmouse84
10 Years Actually
Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."
"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."
Gecko-911
I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.
This tale is haunting.
High/Low
Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace
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"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."
LeastFormal9366
"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."
IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI
The Cursed
"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."
"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."
SmoreOfBabylon
Stay In
"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."
"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."
worldbound0514
Dreams and Facts
"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."
"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."
mattshonestreddit
"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."
Darthdemented
Cracked
Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office
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"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."
Choice-Grapefruit-44
"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."
MacyTmcterry
I love my knuckles.
Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
