Ok, admit it. Who amongst us hasn't had a few too many during a night out? Then, the morning after said night out... found ourselves in an "uncomfortable" position because of the company we open our lids to. Just like when you gotta go... you gotta go; so everyone once in awhile, when it's time to sleep, it's time to sleep. I have fallen off in the strangest places and woken amongst strangers in sexual and non-sexual ways. It's a miracle I'm alive. But when I'm tired, I'm out.
Redditor u/zyht56 was dying to hear about the times we've woken up to find a surprise lying beside with us by asking... People that have woken up in bed with a stranger, what's your story?"I should've thanked Paul Bunyon"
One of my most vivid wake up memories was after a long day of work, the gym, auditions and then an impromptu night out with friends. I left the bar at 330 am in Midtown Manhattan and got on the "A" train to Inwood (the top of the island). From what I remember I must've dozed off right after the train passed Central Park and went rolling into Harlem. When next I awoke the train was stationery at 207th street. As I was rising from my slumber I noticed I wasn't as uncomfortable as I had been in the past, when falling asleep on those hard plastic train seats.
When I finally opened my eyes, I was nestled with care on a strapping (and also intoxicated) gentlemen who could've been the Brawny guy. (Plaid, flannel shirt and all) I looked around, just us. I quietly untangled myself from him like a hidden lover running before the wife comes home. I stood, checked for all my belongings and left. I told the conductor to wake him and then headed home. I should've thanked Paul Bunyon. He was sweet... alas.
Lost
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I know a guy who went home with a stranger. Went pee in the middle of the night naked. Went back to bed. Woke up to screaming. He had gone back to the wrong room and was naked in her mother's bed.
It's Me
Not exactly the answer to the question, but my dad told me something scary after his stroke. Because he couldn't feel one side of his body, he would sometimes wake up in the middle of the night and think a stranger had broken in and was laying next to him. He would have to calm down and remember that he'd had a major stroke and didn't immediately realize that the person he thought was laying next to him was he himself.
Years Later
Was in college, went out too hard on a Thursday night because I had no class the next day. Woke up in my own room to a girl standing there getting dressed. I was dumbfounded, she super casually put on her jacket, said "I have to get to class" and left before I could even get a word out.
I NEVER saw her again. Tried to ask friends who I came home with, everyone said I just disappeared. Her face is burned into my mind and now, 5 years later, I have no clue what happened or who I spent the night with.
No Good Deed
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Got really drunk at a dorm party. Ended up carrying a passed out girl up to her room (3 flights of stairs, elevator was out). Plunked her in her bed, took her shoes off. Then passed out on her floor.
She woke me up by stepping on me and yelling at me. I was too hung over to argue and just left.
Love you Bro
One time at my cousin's house party I was absolutely out of social energy and went to a room to go to sleep and I woke up in the middle of the night with two of the most jacked dudes I've ever seen curled up together next to me and a unit of a bulldog sleeping in between me and the dudes.
One of the guys saw me wake up and he asked if it was cool to sleep there and I said that I didn't mind but he should let me have some of the blanket because it was freaking freezing. He said "no problem bro" and then tucked me in like some mother hen and then said "goodnight bro". Crap was the most strange/wholesome thing I've ever experienced.
"Careful"
See when a comfy bed is calling all you can do is fall prey to its clutches. Now we really need to be a bit more discerning about who is that bed with us. It's only the safe and ethical thing to do. And if we are the one's concerned about who a stranger is remember... 911!! For example...
Would you like fries with that?
Not woke up with one but came home from primary school around 11 years of age. To find a complete stranger in my bed. Being completely naive thinking he was a family friend. I made us both sandwiches to give to him, I returned to my room to find him gone. I now look back at this with complete horror. My family finds it amusing that it took me years to tell my family about it.
Kudos to Dad
Probably not what you imagined.
As a kid, I would sleep walk at night. In the morning, I would have no recollection of what happened.
I spent the night at a friends house when I was about 10, and the family had a fire going in the fireplace in their living room. My friend's mom decided to sleep on the couch to make sure the fire went out, and the dad went to sleep in the parents bedroom. Due to the door to their bedroom always being closed, I had never been inside...
...which was very, very disorienting the next morning when I awoke in said bedroom, as the dad was just waking up and getting out of his bed. He had assumed during the night I was his son, and didn't question anything when i slipped into bed with him.
Kudos to Dad for not making it anymore awkward than it already was.
And that's the story of how I awoke next to my friend's dad.
Mommy High
When I had my son, I couldn't sleep. I told my doctor I hadn't slept a full night in 13 months. Most nights I was getting only an hour or two and I couldn't sleep during the day. I'd try to nap, but I'd just stare at the ceiling.
My doctor prescribed me Ambien.
The first night I took it and went to bed. Sometime during the night, my husband brought the baby into our bed.
I woke up to find a baby covered in rainbows and tiny little gnomes.
Me: "Honey! Honey, wake up. There's a baby in our bed."
Husband: "I know. You're going to wake him up."
Me: "Do his parents know he's here?"
Husband: "His dad does. Go to sleep."
Be Safe
Was a female in my mid 20's and fell asleep in a 60+ man's hotel bed after a night of drinking in restaurant across from said hotel. What could have been a recipe for disaster turned into him saying 'if I ever had a daughter I hope she'd be just like you. I called ya a cab and here's your wallet. Be safe now.'
In the chair...
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Away at college. Went to a bar, met a girl.
I woke up the next morning in an on campus apartment sharing a recliner with said girl.
Neither of us lived on campus or knew who lived in the apartment we ended up at.
"Checklist"
Well at least we've all been there, or a large enough amount of us as to not feel foolish. Things to remember...
1- Get a name...
2- Get details of when, where and how...
3- KNOW WHERE ALL THE EXITS ARE!!!
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.