People Share The Weirdest Facts From Their Family Tree
[rebelmouse-image 18357337 is_animated_gif=Do we every really know another person? Especially family. Every family comes with a past fraught with secrets and 'Dynasty' level drama. In this day and age uncovering family secrets and pasts has become something of an obsessive hobby. Everyone is hitting up the Ancestry and DNA apps and pages to try and trace lineages as far back Jesus. And Lord some of the things that are unexpectedly discovered... some truths make you thankful for vodka.
Redditor _QueenMoogle wanted people to divulge _What are some weird or interesting facts about your families?
LEARNING FROM THE PAST IS IMPERATIVE!
My great-grandfather saved my life, even though he died 89 years before I was born.
He was a semi-well known medical researcher (enough for a wikipedia page and a family of bacteria to be named after him.), who ended up dying after being crazy enough to inject himself with one of the diseases he was studying. 100ish years down the line, I caught one of the diseases that he studied; his research had paved the cure of that and a few other serious diseases.
BREATHSAVER!
[rebelmouse-image 18357338 is_animated_gif=My grandmother is the seventh daughter of a seventh daughter, which makes her special according to some Appalachian old wives tales. Her breath heals canker sores, apparently. People who suffered from canker sores used to drive from miles around to go to her so she could blow in their mouths and make the sores go away. I have multiple family members who swear it works.
THE VANISHING...
[rebelmouse-image 18357339 is_animated_gif=My great uncle disappeared after Vietnam. He killed his best friend playing with a gun when he was a kid and hadn't been the same after, had a bit of a death wish. Vietnam had made him even more morose and withdrawn, so when he vanished, the family just assumed the worst one way or another.
20 years later, come to find out, he had moved to Mexico and started a family. My grandmother got a call from his teenage daughter, letting us know he had passed away. Stomach cancer. Nobody had any idea. Dude just lit out and severed ties without saying a word.
IT SOUNDS FISHY...
[rebelmouse-image 18357340 is_animated_gif=My grandmother had 3 siblings and my grandfather had 6 siblings. They got married, then my grandma's brother married my grandpa's sister, then my grandma's first cousin married my grandpa's other sister, and then my grandma's second cousin married my grandma's third cousin. I have a whole, whole lot of double or triple cousins.
SO I OWN THIS RIGHT?
[rebelmouse-image 18357341 is_animated_gif=A few centuries back, one of my ancestors gifted a palace to a nearby city.
I visited it last year and it was quite weird thinking about how wealthy they must have been back then.
My family have a similar story but with a large estate. Gambled all the money away apparently... it's real sad mannnnn
Our family is supposed to be descended from Lord Byron. I went to Newstead Abbey the ancestral home. He sold it to privately finance his own war with Turkey to free the Greeks from Ottoman oppression. Big place. Lots of land too. No money or titles trickled down to me. : (
PAGING MAURY!!
[rebelmouse-image 18979504 is_animated_gif=It recently came to light that my mom's sister is actually her mother, making my aunt actually my grandmother.
MARRYING INTO THE DRAMA...
[rebelmouse-image 18979505 is_animated_gif=My wife's family is the coolest family ever. My wife is directly related to Marco Polo. Her family has deep deep roots in Italy and Sicily. Her Mother's side of the family almost all have the last name Polo, including her own mother. They actually showed me the lineage pretty far back, with surprisingly few unknown areas in the family tree.
Her great grandfather was actually kicked out of his small town in Southern Italy for being in the Italian Mafia. Yes. They raised money to send him to America from Italy in the early 20th century, to get rid of the patriarch of their mob.
You think that's all the Mafia in her family? Hahahaha, no it gets worse. On her Mother's side of the family there are also Cubans. Specifically, the Cuban Cigar Mafia in Cuba and Florida. Her Grandmother has grainy old pictures from her days as a "Cuban Cigar Princess" in parades and at town events in Yborr City and Tampa. My wife's crazy grandma took out one of those coffee table books on the Cuban Mafia, and there were circled people in pictures with a bunch of machine guns and cash, and she pointed like _"There's your uncle Diego, and his wife Odalys, OH and there's Ernesto! He's such a sweetheart." When my wife's great grandfather died, they put a block in the sidewalk in Yborr City that said _"[Name]. Our Patriarch." They showed that to me too.
I love this family,
THE POPULAR GENE...
[rebelmouse-image 18979506 is_animated_gif=My great-grandmother and great-grandfather were both carriers of the albinism gene, but neither one of them were actually albino themselves.
They had nine children together: each and every single one of them was albino.
SO CLOSE TO POWER!
[rebelmouse-image 18979507 is_animated_gif=My grandmother dated Bill Clinton in high school, he had a pretty major crush on her. She broke up with him because he was in the band.
Similarly, my mother went on a date with Bill Gates in high school. She decided not to do a second date because he was too nerdy.
THE CRUCIBLE...
[rebelmouse-image 18979508 is_animated_gif=My 9x great grandma was Rebecca Nurse, one of the women accused and hung at the Salem Witch Trials. Also my grandpa may have murdered his wife (not my grandma).
GOOD OLE SAL...
[rebelmouse-image 18979509 is_animated_gif=Great granddad survived a coal mine collapse, escaped the Mafia, and lied his way into the US army all at the age of 16.My great granddad, Salvatore, worked with his father in the coal mines of Appalachia until a mine collapse trapped him and a bunch of other men in the mines. He thought he was going to die, so he prayed to God and said, "hey, if you get me out of here, I'll never go into the mines again." Lo and behold he gets out.
Great granddad says, "okay, glad you're safe, we're going back in the mine tomorrow." Salvatore is like, "hell no." They get into a fight that ends with Salvatore leaving. He makes his way to New Jersey where he finds himself working in a bordello as a translator between the Italian (Mafia) owners and their patrons. Well, the mob boss's daughter catches feelings for Salvatore and the Family starts pressuring him to marry the girl. Sal takes one look at the situation and thinks, _"this can only lead to bad things," _and sneaks out of the window in the middle of the night.
He makes his way down to Atlanta, and WWI is in full swing at this point and, fearing the Mafia might try and find him, he signs up with the Navy to try and get away from America for a while. They take him in, train him up as a bugle boy and assign him to a ship.
A few months later, everything is going good, the ship captain has confirmed that they are ready to set sail and then he finds out that his bugle boy, Salvatore, isn't actually of age or a US Citizen. Whoops. Well, the captain can't go back and say that he isn't ready to sail, because he would get into a ton of trouble. So he takes Salvatore down to the courthouse and explains the situation to the judge.
The judge says, "no prob, I kniw what to do." So the captain gets him a bottle of Jack, they slip the number 17 into Salvatore's shoe. And when the judge asks Sal, "are you over 17?" Sal says, "yes," and they make him a citizen. Everything is in order. Sal goes and fights in the war. Lives. Comes back. Does a bunch of other really cool stuff. And dies at a ripe old age.
WHOOPS!!
[rebelmouse-image 18979510 is_animated_gif=A relative declined an offer to invest with Henry Ford. He thought it was a fad.
THE ANSWERS LIE WITH THE SEA...
[rebelmouse-image 18979511 is_animated_gif=My great-uncle was accused of arson and murder and ran away to sea, eventually dying in a knife fight in Shanghai (according to the family story). I desperately want to know more about this, but everyone who knew the story is now dead and none of them wanted to talk about it when they were alive anyway.
His sister also led a fairly adventurous but much more legal life and was lost at sea for a while (although thankfully found again).
DUCK & COVER...
[rebelmouse-image 18979512 is_animated_gif=My family claim that one of my great great uncles was the first man in Ireland to get run over by a van. He worked the docks in Cork and supposedly got hit by a freshly delivered one.
Probab
WE AREN'T 'THE BRADY BUNCH!'
[rebelmouse-image 18351417 is_animated_gif=My family lives on what we call the compound. Essentially they own continuous plots of land my Dad, Grandparents, uncle, and cousin all have houses next to each other on the compound. Great for visiting and we had our wedding there (on a river). Dad keeps trying to get my husband and I to join them. Nope.
SHOW US THE LIGHT!
[rebelmouse-image 18979513 is_animated_gif=My great grandparents both worked for Thomas Edison, which is how they met. That great-grandmother is super badass, too...she came to the States when she was 15 and didn't speak English, just as the German Depression was getting bad. She had to teach herself English and raise enough money to bring her starving family over from Germany to join her here. She lost all her savings in the US stock market crash and had to start all over, but she did it!
BEWARE THE IDES OF MARCH...
[rebelmouse-image 18360340 is_animated_gif=We only die in March. Dogs, grandparents, uncles, we all die in March.
WE'RE A DATELINE EPISODE...
[rebelmouse-image 18979515 is_animated_gif=My grandad was poisoning my nan's tea with rat poison for ages. She was documenting it and told the police, they did a huge bust on him and arrested him in front of all their kids (inc. my mum).
In court, he admitted to it, he agreed to all the charges, he did the deed. Eventually the judge, flummoxed, asked "... But why?" _And his answer was _"Because we agreed to it."
Apparently, they had made an agreement to use rat poison to home-treat her deep vein thrombosis (this brand was basically a blood thinner so the rats couldn't clot when they got injured, and they both distrust doctors). This woman is crazy and I fully believe my grandad's side.
Case got thrown out of court.
RESTRAIN YOURSELF POPS...
[rebelmouse-image 18979516 is_animated_gif=We recently found out that I have at least 5 half siblings because my parents decided it would be nice (and financially beneficial) for my dad to make some donations around the time I was born.
CUSTOMER SERVICE HAS GONE DOWNHILL...
[rebelmouse-image 18979517 is_animated_gif=Jack in the Box used to have a clown for the voicebox in the drive thru... until my grandmother got drunk one night and shot it up after they wouldn't take her order as she walked through.
As long as we paid even the slightest attention during history class, we all know the basic history of World War II.
There are, of course, some historians who learn even more minute details of the history of World War II, possibly even having the opportunity to speak to veterans and Holocaust survivors, of which very few remain today.
However, even the most die-hard history buffs find themselves surprised by some information that isn't common knowledge—things your history teacher might neglect to mention in class, but are worthy of being known by everyone regardless.
"What is a WW2 fact everyone should know?"
The Göring Brothers
"The story of the Göring brothers is mind blowing."
"Hermann Göring was a high ranking Nazi party member."
"He was head of the Luftwaffe and he was designated to be Hitler's successor after the world was conquered and Hitler eventually died."
"His brother was Albert Göring."
"Albert was staunchly Anti-Nazi."
"Albert saw the regime for what it was, brutal, horrible, murdering racists."
"He especially objected to the treatment of the Jewish people."
"Albert would actually use the fact of who his brother was to get out of trouble for helping Jews escape."
"He would do things like drive a transport truck to the camps or ghettos where they were held, and demand to be given multiple people for work, or whatever excuse he would give."
"When he got resistance, he would drag out 'Do you know who my brother is? NOW BRING THEM TO ME!'."
"He would then drive them to safety and release them."
"He once saw a bunch of Jewish women being forced to scrub a street, so he hopped down on his knees and joined them."
"When the Nazi officer realized who he was, the scrubbing stopped."
"He did many things like this."
"Saving Jews from almost certain death."
"Defying the party."
"Defying his brother."
"Again, using his brothers political clout to derail Nazi objectives."
"And then, he gets captured, at the end of the war, and is going to be killed with the other captives, because OF COURSE Göring's brother must be Nazi scum."
"By sheer dumb luck, a person in charge of processing his termination paperwork was a Jew he saved!"
"That person spoke up, and many others did, and he was set free."
"After the war, Albert Göring was questioned during the Nuremberg Tribunal."
"However, many of those he had helped testified for him, and he was released."
"Soon afterwards, Göring was arrested by the Czechs, but he was again released when the full extent of his activities became known."
"Also, after his divorce post war, he ‘married’ his housekeeper solely so she could receive his pension after his death."- Goatmanthealien
Disney Propoganda
"Disney made a number of propaganda cartoons."
"A funny one, depicting Donald Duck living in a caricaturized Third Reich, and a serious one, depicting a German child being raised and systematically brainwashed by the Nazi regime."- Obamas_Tie
Plane Production
"The United States produced 150% more planes in 1944 alone than Japan did in the whole war."- SuvenPan
The Truth Behind Japan
"Purple Hearts given out today by the US were manufactured for the invasion of Japan."- Steve_the_Samurai
Horrific Torture
'Zyklon B, the brand of cyanide used by the nazis to kill in the concentration camps, had a tearing agent in it (basically tear gas)."
"This is because it was used as a rat poison, and the idea was to get people to go away from it."
"The nazis asked the manufacturer to remove it, but they didn't, because they were concerned about losing revenue without that patent."
'So they kept it in, causing much more unnecessary misery and pain than if they just used cyanide."
"X 6 million people."- scrubjays
The True Rise To Power Of The Nazis
"Even though it appears that way to a lot of people, the Nazis did not come to power in one night or even over a short amount of time."
"There were months and years of events that lead to the Nazi takeover of Germany, and years between that takeover and the outbreak of the war."- citanXV
Witold Pilecki
"Witold Pilecki was a polish soldier who purposefully got himself put into Auschwitz so he could report on the atrocities inside."
"He helped other people inside the concentration camp by asking for more food for them, to release them, etc."
"In 1945 he made his report in Auschwitz available to the public."
"He continued to work on liberating those who were inside Auschwitz and died in 1948 via execution."- gaynflamboyant
The Sten Gun Poem
"The Sten gun was hated amongst troops so much a poem was written about it:"
"You wicked piece of vicious tin!"
"Call you a gun?"
"Don't make me grin."
"You're just a bloated piece of pipe."
"You couldn't hit a hunk of tripe."
"But when you're with me in the night, I'll tell you pal, you're just alright!"
"Each day I wipe you free of dirt."
"Your dratted corners tear my shirt."
"I cuss at you and call you names, You're much more trouble than my dames."
"But boy, do I love to hear you yammer When you 're spitting lead in a business manner."
"You conceited pile of salvage junk."
"I think this prowess talk is bunk."
"Yet if I want a wall of lead Thrown at some Jerry's head It is to you I raise my hat."
"You're a damn good pal... You silly gat!"- Imaginary_Fennel6772·
Forgotten Covert Missions
"The US Office of Strategic Services (predecessor to the CIA) devised a plan to demoralize Nazi troops by having French Resistance members secretly spray Nazi officers with the equivalent of military grade fart spray."
"The plan, in theory, was that German troops would think their commander sh*t himself and that would lessen their will to fight."
"So there's that."- __Arty__
The Sinking of the MV Gustloff
"The January 31, 1945 sinking of the MV Gustloff."
"It was a German passenger ship taking fleeing refugees from the eastern front."
"The Soviets downed it in the Baltic sea shortly after it launched."
"The total death toll is unknown because there were so many stowaways but it was at least 9,000, making it the largest maritime disaster in known history."
"It didn't get a lot of press because for the Allies the Germans were the enemy so who cares, and the Nazis certainly didn't want to talk about it because they're in the waning days of a losing war and the last thing they needed was another hit to their already sinking morale."- llcucf80
Nazi Boobytraps
"When in retreat, the Nazis would boobytrap pictures on the walls and leave them slightly crooked."
"They did this to entice officers to straighten them and set off an explosion."- Swizli
World War II lasted from 1939 till 1945.
Even the most dedicated of scholars will continue to learn new information which will surprise and horrify them as records are declassified.
We must always remember all the brave men and women who risked their lives, and whose lives were cut cruelly short.
Now that everyone has access to the internet, it's a lot easier to learn a bunch of stuff ... about a bunch of stuff.
But some people take great delight in deep dives on Wikipedia, and that can lead to a lot of completely random knowledge.
Redditor majdi105 asked:
"What is a completely random fact?"
Blue Blood
"Octopi have blue blood. This is due to their blood containing copper, as opposed to human blood, which contains iron."
"Additionally, as I know someone will bring it up, there are actually multiple correct ways to pluralize octopus. Octopi originates from the Latin pluralization, octopodes originates from the Greek pluralization, and octopuses uses the standard English pluralization."
- ultrasquid9
Fun With Weights And Measures
"A one-pound mixture of U.S. dimes, quarters, and half-dollars will always have a face value of $20, no matter the ratio of dimes to quarters to half-dollars."
- ScottRiqui
"I want to test this but if I go to the bank and ask for a pound of dimes, a pound of quarters, and a pound of half dollars and they don't give it to me in canvas bags with dollar signs on them I'm gonna be real disappointed."
- wandering_ones
"Math checks out. Half dollar is 11.340 g. A quarter is 5.670 g (half the weight and value of a half dollar). A dime is 2.268 g (one-fifth the weight and value of a half dollar). So this isn't unique to $20, but actually any amount of money."
- sputnik1288
This Is Why English Is Hard
"All the C's in 'Pacific Ocean' are pronounced differently."
- Xuntosub
"Love this one, think about it every time I see the words written somewhere"
- taken_us3rname
Heh...Poop
"When you say the word "poop" your lips do the same thing your bottyhole does when you go poop...there. there's a random fact"
- Slay9402
Dictionaries Are Descriptive, Not Prescriptive
"Dictionaries add words not because of worthiness but because of vernacular. If people use the word, then people need to have a way to look it up. It doesn’t matter if you like the word 'crunk' or not"
- typesett
"That word sounds pretty cromulent to me"
- Gaskii
"The comment embiggened my knowledge."
- MacduffFifesNo1Thane
No More Beeps
"Press and hold the # 2 button for about three or four seconds on your microwave to silence the beeping noise. Press and hold it again to turn the noise back on. Works on most microwave ovens. Works like a mute button."
- wyoflyboy68
That's A Lot Of Consonants
"Knightsbridge is the only station on the London Underground to contain six consecutive consonants in its name."
- beeteedee
The Shape Is Important
"Manhole covers are round so they don’t fall in the hole."
- hobanwash1
"They’re also not the only shape that has that property. A Reuleaux triangle can’t fall in."
- davesoverhere
We Were Lied To
"1 horse has about 15 horsepower"
- Businessmoney123
Runways
"Airport runways are numbered based on the magnetic direction they face, rounded to the nearest tenth. Over time as earth’s magnetic field shifts they occasionally have to renumber a runway."
- WakeMeForSourPatch
"Yep and when there's 2 runways that are parallel like at LAX or SFO you end up with something like 28L and 28R for runway 28 Left and Right"
- arent_you_hungry
Science Is Awesome
"if you burn steel wool it gets heavier"
- Josef_45
"Because it's reacting with the oxygen in the air and the resulting oxide includes the mass of oxygen?"
- didijxk
"And you can light it .... with a 9volt battery, even when wet."
- therealtidbits
Not Quite A Rattle
"rattlesnake tails don't actually have anything in them. They're segmented loosely, so the entire thing just kinda flops around. what you're hearing is the individual segments banging into each other."
- FireInHisBlood
What's In A Name?
"The actual name for a butt crack is 'intergluteal cleft.'"
- Gerbilflange
"This would be a kick-ass rock band name."
- Evening_Dress5743
Mountain Facts
"The Appalachian Mountains and the Scottish Highlands are part of the same mountain chain."
- beanomly
"The Appalachian Mountains are older than the rings of Saturn. A lot older."
- Carbon_McCoy
We're Bad At Naming Things
"A mountain chicken is not a chicken. It's a type of frog."
- drywall_punching
Do you have a friend who is a fount of seemingly random knowledge, or are you the fact friend?
We need all kinds to make the world go round. This includes all kinds of people with all kinds of skillsets to do all kinds of jobs.
However, some jobs just aren't needed.
Sometimes it's because the occupation itself is silly. Other times, it's because the company went under or switched directions, but kept paying you for a job that no longer existed.
Whatever the case, Redditors have lots of stories about useless jobs and why they are considered useless, and are ready to share.
It all stared when Redditor Squirrelkid11 asked:
"What job is useless?"
Woof Woof
"Pet Psychic. Our Golden Retriever was getting joint therapy (shoulder injury, worked with a vet, dog did swimming three days a week in a heated pool where he could exercise without putting weight on the joint, also did some exercises, is now fine. The place also did laser therapy and acupuncture for dogs.)"
"Someone said something about 'Hudson' which is our dog's name only they were talking to another dog. 'Oh,' they said, 'That's the dog psychic's dog.' Apparently you could find out what your dog was thinking."
"I know what my dog is thinking. Most of the time he either wants what I'm eating or he wants me to throw the ball."
– LucasBN2
"I'm a pet psychic too, but unfortunately I can't speak dog. Whole lot of woofing going on in their heads though."
– Herzeleid-
Falling To The Wayside
"I once filed charges against my employer for an unethical issue that happened. Attorneys were involved and it was ugly for about 2 weeks. I had all job assignments taken away while the investigation was conducted. In the middle of the investigation is when covid took off and the world went into a tailspin."
"Everyone who was involved with my issue/charge just started exiting the company and I just never had any duties given back to me. I stayed in that role for 6 months without anyone ever questioning what I did. I would come into work, and make a lap around the site, take an hour lunch and come and go as I wanted."
"It was a fortune 500 and they just lost track of who I was or what I was doing. I was working on a project team and everyone just assumed my direction came from someone else. At one point the company slashed 20% of the salaried workforce and I never heard a word."
"When I left the company for an external opportunity they gave me a sizable exit package to resolve my charge and a wonderful review. It was the worst of times due to the anxiety of always expecting the worst, and the best of times because I was just coming and going with no direction or expectations of any kind."
– eedlez67
"I've had something similar to this happen myself. I wasn't paid, though."
"I'm an off-site subcontractor for a huge corporation. Huge, as in, not just one building at headquarters, it was an entire campus spread over 20 buildings. I work from home."
"So I'm a subcontractor, not an actual employee. And I need to go to HQ for a week of hands-on work that can't be done at home."
"The hands-on work required access to a server room. And the server room was locked, you needed a passcard to get in. So for the first day or two, I'd have to bug an employee to let me back into the server room after going to the bathroom, or to lunch."
"Plus, I had nowhere to "work". Nowhere to set up my laptop and actually get work done. There were no desks/chairs in the server room."
"So some low-level executive got the bright idea, let's get whomp a temporary badge and passcard to access the server room without bugging anyone else, and let's let whomp set up in one of those empty, unoccupied offices."
"The intent was for this to be temporary, but the corporate wheel started moving...."
"All of a sudden, overnight, that unoccupied office got all the things that a new hire would get. Staplers, monitors, file folders, pens, pencils, desk blotter. A binder showed up with company handbook, policies, maps, and so on."
"The next day, the office had MY NAME on it. A BRASS PLAQUE on the door had my name on it. And a phone was installed, and the office assistant came over to show me how to use it. I had a voicemail mailbox that now belonged to me. A laptop was issued to me. I was shown how to access the shared printer."
"My week ended, and I went back home, cross country."
"For MONTHS, "my office" was still there! I'd ask friends who worked there, to go check, and my office was still there. Others working nearby thought I was just traveling a lot. My voicemail stayed active for months too. To everyone's understanding, I was an employee who just happened to work odd hours, or something."
"About eight months later someone figured out the mistake."
– whomp1970
Ring, Ring
"Telemarketers, I don’t know a single person who has actually purchased something from a telemarketer. Maybe it’s something the older generation does but everyone hates them and immediately hangs up on them around me."
– Administrative_Toe96
"I don't even answer my phone when friends call."
– mscocobongo
"I worked as a telemarketer for State Farm when I got out of high school, and in 8 months I had one person actually let me give her a quote. It was my aunt."
– YoutubeRewind2024
What Did The Sign Say?
"No one is talking about those sign spinners that became popular."
"Who has ever seen someone flipping a sign and"
- "been able to read it"
- "went to the business to buy something because of it"
– Oshester
Privacy Please
"Bathroom attendants. I don’t need somebody in there pulling paper towels out the dispenser just to hand it to me and compel me to tip them."
– Ozzy_HV
"I never saw this until I was visiting Ireland a few years back, and man, was it f*cking annoying."
"It's bad enough there's a guy standing at the sinks watching you have a leak, but then he wants a euro or two for handing you a towel to dry your hands."
– Fresh-Hedgehog1895
Ouch!
"Influencers"
– sugarkiwipie
"What's the difference between a social media influencer and a philosophy major?"
"The philosophy major needed a degree to be useless."
"(Sorry philosophy majors)"
– Actuaryba
Pressing Buttons
"An elevator attendant."
"“First floor sir? I’ll press button number 1 for you.”"
– Carl_Clegg
"I’m so old I remember when they had these in department stores. Whilst shopping with my grandma one day we got in an elevator and the attendant asked if we wanted the second floor. My grandma replies, “why yes, how did you know?” He says, “ma’am, there’s only two floors, and we’re currently on the first one.”"
– Penguin_Dreams
Office Matron
"The lady who walks around the office saying "Don't be on your phones, if you have time for that then you can study about the company!""
"Same lady that is pushing hard to go back in the office, because remote work pointed out how useless that position is."
– digitalmofo
"We had that lady at my old job. She would put passive aggressive laminated signs in the bathroom about cleaning up after yourself. Since she's an idiot (big surprise) most of the signs had major spelling mistakes. Some coworkers and I would edit them and give an overall grade on the signs, usually with a note that said "Subpar work. Please see me after class.""
– tallhorsemusic
Tempting Fate
"I took a job scheduling residential HVAC technicians for a mid-sized company after a few years of working in the field. A few months in, the company ended its residential program to focus on commercial."
"Thing is, they already had commercial schedulers. My boss told me she'd find me a new roll, but then she took another job elsewhere and left."
"I stayed as a scheduler with no one to schedule in a department that no longer existed. No one in the office seemed to realize this, and for over half a decade, I would show up, make friendly conversation in the breakroom while making my coffee, and then literally just did nothing the rest of the day. Having left a stressful job, it was glorious."
"Occasionally someone would ask me an hvac or system-related question over email, and that was it. I made sure everyone liked me by bringing in bagels every Monday and donuts every Friday."
"Then covid happened and now I was doing nothing at home!"
"When I learned the company was being sold, I figured I wouldn't tempt fate anymore and applied elsewhere. My department head gave a glowing recommendation, having no idea what I even did but knowing I was friendly and helped him jump his car a few times."
– Belozersk
Got A Car? You're Safe!
"We have a specific security guard we've had for 13+ years now and is pretty useless. The security guard lives there and has a tv. He watches telenovelas most of the time."
"All he does is open the gate, and doesn't even bother to even inspect though, since according to his logic 99% of people who can afford a car aren't bad/harmful people. He doesn't ask names or house numbers, just opens the gate whenever he sees a car."
"Anyone can come in if they have a car, he doesn't even inspect faces."
"And do you know the worst part?"
"When moving into the privada, you are supplied with your own control remote. The gates are also automatic."
– Chandler367
"So he only opens the gate for anyone who doesn't live there..? Yikes"
– spencerandy16
Teach Me Tonight
"My math teacher who tells me to log in to Pearson and then disappears"
– NethrixTheSecond
"21st century version of"
"here's today's packet, it's based on chapter 4 in the text book, good luck" *plays solitaire for an hour"
– TitanicMan
"I dropped a university class this term because the week 3 assignment said to 'look up how to do this on Google, Stackexchange, or ChatGPT'."
"I'm not paying 1400 dollars to be taught by an ai chat bot lmao"
– 303Devilfish
The sad thing is, teaching is one of the least useless jobs out there.
Maybe if we paid them better, they'd want to be better!
Not everything is a good idea and not every invention should be placed on the market.
But you'll never know what can be a success without seeing if people like it.
It may sound like a billion dollar idea but in the end, you may take a loss.
Redditor istrx13 wanted to discuss the products that went nowhere, so they asked:
"What product was supposed to be the next big thing but wound up failing miserably?"
Life is all hit or miss.
Especially when inventing.
Transport Revolution
"The Segway was once touted as a revolutionary transportation device, but ultimately failed to live up to its hype due to its high cost, limited practicality, and safety concerns."
fulfillmen25
Drunk Fried Chicken GIF by Ethan BarnowskyGiphyShattered
"Google Glass."
doublebankshot
"I dropped I think it was $1400 on it back then, and when I got them it was immediately obvious that they were going to be a huge disappointment; everything from UI to battery life to comfort to photo quality was so bad that my first impression was that they felt almost like a joke product rather than an actual product manufactured by a tech company, not even an early developer version."
ds445
A great idea...
"Zune was supposed to be the death of Apple's monopoly on MP3 players."
HoopOnPoop
"Zune actually wasn't a bad piece of hardware. It was just that by the time it came out, iPod was already entrenched. It was around the same price, so it couldn't undercut Apple on pricing. ZunePass was actually a pretty great idea, years before Spotify."
Wulfbak
"My favorite thing about Zune is that it featured what was actually a pretty cool and interesting design feature wherein a user could send a song to another Zune user for free, but Microsoft chose the single worst possible name for this feature, calling it 'squirting.' Zune kids back in the day had to be like 'Ayyy bro that song is fire, squirt that at me.'"
HostileSkittles
Fly High
"Hoverboards. I think their primary problem was their lack of ability to hover. Also 300 ish dollars for something that goes as fast as... legs is just dumb."
IceClimbers_Main
"Their main downfall was the many, many cheap and dangerous clones from china. When the OG hoverboards were too expensive for most, the big Chinese companies saw a hole to get into the market making them for pennies on the dollar by removing safety devices, using cheaper batteries, lower gauge wire, etc. It was for the worst."
ptthree420
Entertainment Options
"Curved TVs… oh and 3D TVs we’re a thing for a while too!"
Sherlockssocks
"I own a curved 3D TV. I've probably used the 3D less than a hundred times. I think if they'd pushed the spilt screen gaming thing a bit more they would have sold more."
Signal-Morning7669
Shake Your Rump Television GIF by Beastie BoysGiphyThose curved TVs freak me out.
I just liked my DVD
"Laser discs...? I think they were called. Picture a DVD the size of a record."
Drawn-Otterix
"Laserdiscs were successful, they're just an obsolete format now."
Born_Anteater_3495
digital audio spinning GIF by Feliks Tomasz KonczakowskiGiphyCleansed
"Olestra/Olean. It was going to transform all junk food into low fat. Instead, it transformed lower GI tracts."
1800sMan
"OMG this! Around 1998 I worked for a huge ad agency on Madison Ave in NYC that had the Pringles account. They were pushing that Olestra trash at the time and obvi it was to be part of the campaign we were creating. One day I grab a can and start munching away."
"Well 15 minutes later I feel like I’ve swallowed a hand grenade and start racing to the bathroom where I proceed to destroy the bathroom for a good half hour. It just would not stop. I swear I saw a demon that day while emptying my poor bowels. Never ever again with that Olestra garbage."
bruh_wut69
Guess What?
"Oh man this is really specific to my career field in childcare."
"Smart diapers. Yep, diapers that will inform you on your app when your child uses them. I don’t know anyone who seriously considered getting these. But I remember seeing ads on my social media for them. Guess what? No one wanted them."
Onlyfansnanny
"As a law student, my son worked on getting the patent and prototype on these a little over ten years ago. At the time, however, they were being marketed to nursing homes. IDK whatever happened with that."
Ok-Bee1579
The Mess
"Meta."
SuperScario
"I finally decided to look up what meta was on Youtube a few months ago and I swear I thought I was watching some Nintendo wii game or something. My jaw hit the floor when I realized that's what meta actually looked like, billions of dollars for a Nintendo looking world, what a f**king dumpster fire."
twister55555
Bute Sized
"Quibi."
chyna094e
"Part of it was the worst timing imaginable. The service was meant to be 'bite sized' entertainment, something you could watch in 5 minutes while standing in a queue or maybe a couple segments on a public transit ride."
"They launched the first week of April 2020. Remember all the queues you were standing in and public transit rides you took then? Yeah, the same as everyone else - NONE because 95% of the population was stuck at home for 6 months!"
alinroc
Minis...
"Spore. It was hyped as a game that went from spark of life to galactic conquest. It's just a bunch of mini games."
rosanymphae
College Hoops Sport GIF by NCAA March MadnessGiphyI missed the spore phenomenon.
Oh well.