We can all agree sleep is great, right? It goes third, chocolate cake. Second, watching your child succeed at anything. First, sleep. So when something wakes you up from a deep slumber it can ruin the rest of your day. When that 'something' turns out to be terrifying, well, that can ruin your life.
Reddit user, u/Hoostolf, wanted people to dig deep into their thoughts and share:
What is the worst/scariest thing that has woken you up?
On And Off...On And Off...
I've told this before, but my son has taken to sleepwalking.
He used to just stand by the bed, silently, until I'd snap awake and see his silhouette looming over me.
Now, he's taken to turning on the lights when he's sleepwalking. I woke up one night, and he was standing there, turning the lights on ... and off ... on ... and off ... completely zoned out.
I get him back to bed, and I think, f-ck this, I'm sleeping downstairs for the rest of the night.
Around three o'clock I wake up. All of the lights downstairs are on.
Let's Hear About That Possum Again
GiphyWas woken at 3am by a drunk man trying to open the external door into my room. It's not something you expect to happen when you live out of town, surrounded by paddocks.
Oh and there was also the time I woke up to a possum on my side table. That wasn't pleasant for either party.
It's Real?
My math teacher calling out my name 6+ times in a room of 20 other students and me slowly waking up while mumbling 'shhhh be quiet,' not realizing that the voice I was hearing wasn't, in fact, in a dream.
Stinky Breath Warning Sign
My daughter was a sleepwalker. There is something so indescribably creepy about waking up to a four-year-old standing at your bedside, just staring. She wouldn't make a sound; she'd let her stinky breath wake me up.
Then once I recovered from the shock of her being there, she'd speak in tongues because she wasn't really awake. I'd assure her she was asleep and escort her back to her room to be tucked in, never taking my eyes off her for fear her head would swivel around fully and she'd laugh maniacally at me. Scared the piss out of me every time.
Something From The Mind Of Kubrick
A few years back I hear a thud in the hallway and my 4 year old daughter screaming in pain. She had fallen and gotten a small but deep cut just above her left eyebrow. When I got out to the hallway, her face, hands and pajamas were COVERED in blood and she was holding her hands against her face.
I thought she lost her eye. A quick trip to the ER for a couple of stitches and she was right as rain, but I gained almost all of my grey hair that night.
ROBOT!
GiphyAnyone here have one of those robotic vacuums? When the power goes out those f-ckers start wandering around lost, bumping into sh-t.
Absolutely terrifying thing to be woken up by at 3 in the morning.
Let's Just Put Those Up Here...
My 2 year-old standing over me with a kitchen knife. He wanted sliced apples at 4:00 in the morning, and somehow managed to climb up on table and pull out a knife.
Now we keep them in the cupboard.
Maybe Change The Locks?
One important preface: at the time I lived alone, no roommates. One time I was taking a nap in my bedroom, happened to have a really horrible nightmare, and then woke up to some strange man standing in my bedroom shining a flashlight in my face while I laid in bed.
Both of us freaked the f-ck out. It turned out he was the maintenance guy for the apartment complex I lived in, finally responding to a maintenance request I had put in like six months before. He thought the apartment was empty, then heard me thrashing around from the nightmare and went and looked into the dark bedroom (blackout curtains) with his flashlight to see what was making the noise.
After both of us recovered from our near heart attacks he was extremely apologetic, and he did finally fix my garbage disposal, but Jesus Christ that was f-cking terrifying for a few seconds.
One Night Terror Leading Into The Next
My buddy and I were camping and saw a bear, so we decided to sleep in his car. I was still worried about the bear, so it took forever to fall asleep.
Well right after I fell asleep, I woke up to screams and something grabbing my face. I immediately started crying, knowing that a bear was about to rip my face off. Then I realized it was my friend having a night terror. I was lividdddddd
...And Then Sometimes It's Real
GiphyActually just happened last week. Woke up to my dog growling and someone was shining a light into my window at 2 am. I was super out of it and trying to process what was going on since the light was coming from someone in my fenced in backyard. Then my dog barked loud and the person ran away.
"What screams 'I make terrible financial decisions' ?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"Burning friends by asking for 'emergency' money, (based on some fake story), that you will never repay."
"Yes, oddly specific."
"Yes, all too common."- urkldajrkl
Children Are Meant To Have Hand-Me-Downs, Right?
"My neighbor can’t buy her kids school shoes."
"But has custom rims and wheels."- Comfortable-Rate497
The Military Is not Known For Being Lucrative
"A Private in any branch of the military buying a Dodge Charger."- Lukanian7·
dodge GIF by Off The JacksGiphyRe-sale 101?
"My ex SIL went to Walmart and bought a sh*t load of nail clippers, files, polish, and anything to do fingernails with."
"I asked her what the hell she planned on doing with all that."
"She told me she was going to start a flea market."- Buddyslime
If You Have To Ask, I Can't Afford It
"When you ask them how much they paid for something and they only know the monthly payment amount."- jiggeroni
Payday!!!
"Making impulsive decisions right after getting paid."- daisiesandpoetry
Pay Day Money GIFGiphyCoffee Is Where Some People Just Won't Compromise
"I know someone who is always struggling with money."
"Then I found out he has individual cups of Dunkin Donuts coffee delivered to him (via third party apps of course) while he's working at home."
"You know, instead of making a pot of coffee for yourself."- MrFishpaw
Warped Priorities
"Can't pay rent on time, but never misses a night out."- jessie_monster·
Makes Perfect Sense...
"A family member of mine has been begging money from everyone."
"He says they don't have enough money for food / rent / fuel for his wife to get to work or for tires."
"We own a tire shop, and offered him a set of used tires for $40 if he will help mount them (it's a job he's familiar with)."
"He said he didn't have $40."
"He goes to my sister in law and says he needs to make money for tires."
"She starts paying him daily for doing some remodeling work for her."
"He informs her on day 3 that he won't be available for the next two weeks because he is going on vacation to new Orleans."- Desperate_Camel_4159
car help GIF by Bubble PunkGiphyOnly The Best...
"Having the top of the line everything with a minimum wage job."
"Unless you are an unlicensed pharmacist on the side."- Ellieoconnor
Savings Accounts Exist For A Reason
"Every time you get a chunk of cash, you think you have to find a way to spend it."- Sponess
And They Don't Worry About It Getting Scratched Or Stolen...
"Expensive flashy car in the low-rent apartment complex parking lot."- Kedosto
car gold GIFGiphyJust One Click...
"Getting into debt to buy luxury products online."
"The vast majority of luxury customers aren't millionaires, they're regular people who earn below 6 figures."- lehmx
Moochers Gonna Mooch...
"When you have a 150k 'allowance', a free house and vehicle and you're still dead broke for 4 -5 months of the year."
"Sound specific? It's my entitled piece of sh*t uncle."- bhenghisfudge
They Notice...
"Fancy pickup truck with bald tires."- grondfoehammer
Chevy Truck Ipofshow GIF by Off The JacksGiphyWhen presented with a large sum of money, it is hard not to immediately think of how you plan to spend it.
Often forgetting how nice it would be to have it sitting in a savings account, should you find yourself coming up short on rent or bills.
After all, who can truly enjoy fancy things if you know you can't afford them?
Redditor aloe_veracity wanted to discuss simple turn-ons and turn-offs, so they asked:
"What common 'sexy' thing is a turn-off for you personally?"
I do not get and will never understand skinny jeans.
Whoever thinks they are sexy is blind.
Use your words...
baby talking GIFGiphy"Baby talk, is that supposed to be sexy? Because it kinda makes me wanna take them to daycare."
kaeyasimp420
"I baby talk with my partner, but it’s less of a sexy thing and more of a cute n’ cuddly thing when we’re embracing each other."
H2OhYeahh
Off Color
"In Ireland, fake tan is very popular among women of all ages. But any guy I have talked to about this topic hates it, it's okay when done right but 99.9 percent of the time it is orange and patchy and looks like baby diarrhea smeared all over your body."
"Any woman I have discussed this with insists it looks amazing and that the boys love it, but I and any guy I have talked to about it are turned off majorly by the sight and even smell of it."
john_lemon7812
"My sister just shamed me for going somewhere without a fake tan. Don’t mind being pale in Ireland anymore though. Just too much effort to smell like fake tan, and have fake tan on my bed, and clothes. All just to look orange ha."
Kaza-beo
Just Howl
"Ripping off clothes during sex. Just take them off, no need to be a werewolf."
SuvenPan
"Did this twice. The first time I knew ahead of time that it was on the table, so I wore an old shirt that probably should have been thrown out by that point anyway. The second time, though, was totally on impulse and popped the buttons off of a really nice button-down blouse I’d worn for a job interview that day. At the time, it was hot af but once the hormones wore off and I couldn’t find all the buttons to sew them back on, I was miffed about it."
mokutou
Be Normal
"Aside from all the physical turn-offs, I am turned off by someone who's acting sexy, it's too ridiculous to me. Just act normal."
_Norman_Bates
"Ugh my husband used to do this, admittedly he can be incredibly socially awkward sometimes which cracks me up and is a reason why I love him, but man do I hate it when he tries to be sexy, squinting his eyes and slightly while raising his eyebrows, biting his lips and all. Gives me the ick so bad."
urscndmom
Unsexy
Not Listening Season 5 GIF by FriendsGiphy"Dated a girl who was really into anime once, she did the hentai cries to be sexy and it was just the most unsexy thing I've ever experienced."
GemoDorgon
This anime craziness is taking over.
To each their own.
Clothes On
dance party GIFGiphy"Male strippers. Just not for me and if I ever got a lap dance, I would probably just end up laughing lol."
semisweetdreams87
So Arrogant
"When confidence turns into arrogance."
DeerZealousideal7423
"Agreed. There's a difference between giving off the impression you know how to handle anything thrown your way and thinking that any communication with you is me thinking I'm hot crap and you think I'm unworthy of your attention."
patrickwithtraffic
"I struggle with this, but not because I am arrogant lol. I looked down on my abilities so much that I faked arrogance to be funny. My friends get the joke and we laugh, but I forget the joke doesn't land when the person has just met me."
jedadkins
I Still Cringe
"Oh, God. I KNOW this isn’t common outside of like, the 11th grade, which makes it worse. I have a 6’7 ex who would wiggle his eyebrows and do that tongue flicker thing. Something about something that off-putting being done by a towering beast of a man just made it 1000x worse. I still cringe."
No-Photo8763
"My ex used to do this lick/slurp noise and kinda hang his tongue tip out when he talked about hot people. It legit made me gag more than once. That particular gesture has stuck with me more viscerally than anything else he did."
LeSilverKitsune
Flavored
Tv Show Hulu GIF by The BearGiphy"Girls calling me 'Daddy,' it's gross and incestuous. I prefer to be called Chef, it's professional and implies we going to flavor town."
BicycleMinimum4629
Grow Long
"These stupid short beards which are way too symmetric and that everyone gets from the barber. Like someone drew it with a marker."
Kampfzwerg0
Again, sexiness is all subjective.
Our tastes are clearly all over the map.
Enjoy.
