I love animals. I used to be strictly a dog person, but then I found a stray cat who had been abandoned at only weeks old. Needless to say she stole my heart, even though I am allergic to cats. She was worth it. Now years later I am surrounded by a cat and two dogs. And I love them but, they are all nuts. They act like escaped mental patients day in and day out. And they are all strong personalities. Also, they are far from boring.
Redditor u/wheel-snipe-celly wanted to hear about life with all the fur babies by asking... People who own multiple pets, what is some drama going on between them right now?"The 3"
As I type this I can see them stationed at three different points of the room. They are pretending to sleep. Every once and awhile they change positions, which is merely subterfuge to survey where the others are. This way once there is movement, they can leap into action at one another for no apparent reason. Or maybe the reason is to drive me insane? Who else can attest?
Hopeless
Wiener Dog Listening GIF by Originals
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The dachshund will NOT stop invading the beagle's personal space (crate) to suck on her ears. The beagle has HAD it and wants it to stop. Two things tho:
- Beagles have a really hard time being stern and intimidating
- Dachshunds are NOT easily intimidated
So this morning we had 40 minutes of beagle "growling" (not very convincing sounding) and dachshund "sass" (barking back) ending up AS USUAL with an annoyed beagle with soggy ears.
It's hopeless.
EDIT: Here they are
Creepy Cat
In college, we lived in the second floor and would leave the sliding glass door open with the screen door shut on nice days. We'd often come home to find my dog, stuck on the balcony. We figured out that my roommate's cat was opening the screen door to let the dog out and then closing the door.
The Growl
My roommate has 2 large male dogs and I have a small female dog. My roommates male dogs like to rough house and play around sometimes. Whenever they get too loud my little dog will raise her head and growl ever-so-slightly. Just enough for them to hear her. As soon as she does, they stop for a minute and start playing quieter. Freaking surreal to see.
It's all soft...
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My two dogs like the same bed so they will fight over it until the end result is they just both sleep on it (while the other bed just goes unused-I don't see the difference between the two they are both super soft?!).
youngest child syndrome...
3 cats (2 on purpose, then we had a happy accident for the third) Miku, Chloe, and Oliver. Oliver wants to play CONSTANTLY, and both the girls hate that. They'll cuddle with him in order to share a lap, but they get so mad at him when he tries to play. They don't hurt him though, just swatting with no claws and growls. Whenever they try to do that though he runs to my mom and cries until she picks him up. He's definitely got youngest child syndrome.
"Looney Tunes"
So I'm not the only one with looney pets. Good to know. Maybe I should bring them around animals more? It could be they aren't as social as possible. They aren't mean, just conniving and energetic. The next few stories may shed some light.
Dog Tricks
Dog 1 is trying to trick dog 2 into following her into the garden so that dog 1 can then storm back indoors to take dog 2's bone she is enjoying. Dog 3 is sitting in the on the couch quietly waiting for this to happen, to be the actual winner of this scheme.
The Fury
We got a puppy two weeks ago. Our elderly cat is furious when we do dog training sessions because cat deserves the treats instead. We end up doing joint training sessions and the cat is actually much more consistent than puppy.
In my house, if a package crinkles, it must be treats. And if there are treats, they must be for kitty and puppy, but kitty first. KITTY. FIRST.
leading the stampede
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On my Uncle's farm a cat got into its head that attacking a cow was a good idea. Jumped on it, bit it around the neck. Of course when one cow runs, they all run... Cat caused a mini-stampede that took out several fences. And somehow walked away unscathed.
Open Windows
Two cats. I opened the window for the first time this year since the weather is finally nice. They have been pushing each other away for the best spot to smell the air.
Same! One open window in the house, in my office next to my desk. My two girls usually share really well but the window has been causing squabbles.
Edit: Photo evidence - https://imgur.com/gallery/roSasax.
The Look
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The dog doesn't like when the cat gives him dirty looks. The cat knows this, will deliberately stare him down, and then expertly leap out of the way when he goes to chase her.
Triple Détente...
Three cats until several months ago, now four. All from different litters. All fixed.
When it was just the three girls they had a shifting power dynamic that my wife and I called the Triple Détente. When the male was added, things got weird. He terrorizes one, creepily stalks another, and is terrified of the third. This has created a bizarre new dynamic with a top cat (the female that terrifies the male) for the first time in years.
Shame...
Love this question haha I have 2 cats one that is a bit dramatic and there is always this stray cat that comes to stare at her from the distance, the never gets close but my cat yells like she is being attacked. When I go out and check it out the stray cat is on the other side of the sidewalk and my cat is at my door all curled up. All this happens and my other cat just stares through the window with dislike for my yelling cat.
I'm ashamed of my cat because her yelling is like super loud and all my neighbors know it's her causing drama.
Hey Pooh
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I have two sibling cats, a boy and girl. The girl developed heart problems and wasn't eating as much, so the boy cat took advantage and was eating a lot of her share. Now she's a little too skinny and he's gotten fat.
Ok, so I need to separate their food - So I got an automatic feeder for the boy cat, and made a feeder box that only the girl cat could fit in, which made the boy cat mad. He eventually gained the confidence to Winnie-the-Pooh himself into her feeder box, which is frustrating if I ever need to be gone for the weekend, as he'll literally eat all her food before she touches it.
So far my solution is to put a little inflatable collar on him when I'm gone, so he has a barrier besides his fat to keep him from going in.
Also I had to barricade his automatic feeder because he kept beating it up to get loose kibbles. Now he stares longingly at that feeder all day.
No Touching Game
We adopted a puppy last year (german pointer/mutt female). Our 6 year old pup (corgi/border collie male) was fine at first, but gradually decided he was not having any of her shenanigans and will growl/bark at her when he doesn't want to play. Now she's turned it into a game and whenever she wants attention she lays in front of him on her back, belly exposed, wags her tail and wiggles her body - she never touches him during this. He ALWAYS responds with low tone growling and a random bark. It's the dog version of "I'm not touching you."
T & J!!!
I have a cat, a puppy, and a dog. Cat likes to lure the puppy under the bed and he can get under but gets stuck in the middle where it's the lowest. I have to rescue him (usually around 2 am and he wakes me up by scratching the floor trying to get out). Cat also likes to knock off things from the counter he knows puppy should not be chewing on. Puppy and cat like to wrestle with each other.
But dog doesn't like the ruckus and barks at them to stop. Cat doesn't like the barking so then he chases dog. Puppy follows cat and there's a train of 3 Tom and Jerry style through the house. At the end of the day tho they are always in a big cuddle pile so I think they'll be okay.
Alex cat looked at Natalie cat which she doesn't like so she screamed and poop shot across the floor. And now Natalie has taken Summer's favorite sleeping place so Summer threw up on the carpet.
Pretty much a normal day in other words.
On Patrol
My 15 year old cat just died a week ago. He had a heart condition and we knew he was close to the end of his journey. His sis yellow lab has been looking for him all around the house since then. She won't sleep cause she is patrolling the house looking for her bro.
Leading the Blind...
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We adopted a heavily abused and partially blind dog who was full of anxiety.
We also have 4 cats but only 2 of them are brave enough to go visit her.
The drama is that when she hears all the cats running around playing she wants to join but being semi blind and a 50/50 chance it won't be a friendly cat she just gets sad and whines.
Familia...
We have 2 dogs, a very large all black German Shepherd, and a recently adopted miniature dachshund. At first they were getting along fine but now the German Shepherd literally follows the little dachshund around everywhere he goes! They're literally inseparable now and it's kind of adorable lol.
The only real drama that's come from this is that now both dogs fight for attention whenever the other seems to get some.
Here's a picture of them in case y'all wanted to see them
Edit: Omg I just got off of work and saw this post blew up! I'll let the good boys know that Reddit loves them when I get home lol.
Oh Jenny
Old drama, but when i moved into my last apartment my cats met my roommate's cat: Jenny. Jenny is an incredible creature, talkative and cuddly and weird but also passive aggressive as hell. She would get a lil jealous if my cats got more attention, but mostly she just got mad when she didn't get to go outside. When she got angsty she took it out on the other cats. In my first week she pushed my oldest off the balcony. Marzipan hit the iron fencing below and lost a tooth 😭. Somehow Marz still loved Jenny.
"Covid"
During the pandemic it's been noted that many animal shelters are now empty. So many people took pets into their homes to spread the love and warmth. Our pets may be crazy from time to time, but they're worth it. That's why... if you adopted or bought a pet during Covid, please don't return them after. That's just cruel. They aren't toys. They're part of the home now. Treat them accordingly.
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Every now and then, a friend of ours might say something, or we might overhear a complete stranger say something that makes us stop in our tracks.
More often than not, what we can't believe we just heard is something so ridiculous, we can't help but put the person who said it in their place.
Other times, however, what we just heard might have stunned us silent because of how shockingly clever it was.
Resulting in our not wanting to scold or yell at someone, but rather give them a handshake.
Redditor SubmergingOriginal was curious to hear the sharpest and wittiest things they've ever heard, from friends and strangers alike, leading them to ask:
"Enough with the dumbest; what is the wittiest thing you've ever heard someone say?"
Don't Give Me So Much Credit...
'I was on a team at work that was on a project working insane overtime."
"One night after an 80-90 hour week, we were all sitting around the table trying to finish up so we could go home."
"Around 11, my buddy's wife called, dubious about the hours he'd been keeping."
"We heard her through the line - 'are you cheating on me?'"
"Exasperated, he looked at our boss, then replied 'honey, if I was cheating on you, I would have been home by now'."- lionbatcher
Eternal Optimism...
"Asked a blind guy if he'd been blind his whole life."
"He said 'Not yet'."- Feeling_Mode_6465
Free time Isn't The Only Thing He Has On His Hands...
"My brother got a vasectomy and when the doctor was releasing him and giving him instructions (with the nurse listening in), one of the orders was to 'come back and have a follow-up appointment after you’ve ejaculated 30 times'.”
"Without missing a beat my brother asked 'what time do you open tomorrow?'”
"The nurse couldn’t keep it together after hearing that."- UtahUtopia
Awkward Season 8 GIF by The Office
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Double Whammy!
"My pal uses the phrase 'he doesn’t look strong enough to carry information' and it cracks me up every time."
"Calling someone stupid and weak in one fell swoop."- JennyW93
Can't Hide Your DNA...
'Whenever I jokingly insult my mum, she says 'that must be where you get it from'."
"She cracked the code."
"I can never offend her without offending myself."- JennyW93
Self-Sufficient!
"My brother was a line cook at a New Orleans restaurant."
"My mom was in town, staying at a fancy hotel, and he stopped by after work, still wearing his kitchen whites."
"He was reading a newspaper in the lobby waiting for her to come down when the shocked lobby manager sputtered at him, 'MAY I HELP YOU!?!?'
"He answered, 'thanks, but I know how to read',” and went back to his paper."- jobrody
Morph Current Affairs GIF by Aardman Animations
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A Miracle!
"My brother-in-law’s comment."
"The entire family went out for my mother’s 80th birthday and after the meal we all went to a local park, largely occupied by the elderly, to rest."
"My mother needed crutches at this point, and they were resting against her bench."
"My 10-year-old niece, who looked like every starving waif image from Dickens, grabbed the crutches and started hobbling round the park."
"All the OAPs were following her progress with looks of pity until my brother ran up behind her, and kicked away the crutches."
"There was an audible gasp from round the park and then my niece picked the crutches back up and started chasing my brother, clearly intending to hit him."
"In the confused silence my brother-in-law’s voice rang out 'Praise be! She can walk again!'"
"We still think this was the highlight of the birthday celebrations."- DdraigGwyn
Still Legal, Whichever Way You Cut It...
"I picked up my pleasantly tipsy boyfriend from a nightclub."
"We were stopped by the Police for a random breath test."
"They asked me my age, and I said, 33."
"My bf blurted out '33? You told me you were 22'."
"Police just laughed and let me go."- Aggravating-Corgi379
Music Video Police GIF by Andrew W. K.
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A Bit Too On The Nose?
"Business law class in college years ago, talking about the issues that black Americans had before the Civil Rights."
"Amendment, trying to travel through the south with the discrimination so rampant, trying to find restaurants to serve them and decent lodgings."
"My instructor was posing a hypothetical: 'So you pull up out front of this place, you're exhausted from driving for hours, and you see the sign out front says 'Ku Klux Klan Motel'."
"'What would you expect to find there?'"
"Without missing a beat, from the back of the room came this gem: "'Extra sheets in every room?'"- NedsAtomicDB
Not Yet, Anyway...
"I was working with my friend and his dad."
"My friend (26) heard an ice cream truck near where we were working."
"He asked his dad if he could have a couple dollars."
"His dad asked, 'what for?'"
"My friend told his dad that there was an ice cream truck in the neighborhood, and that they were playing music."
"My friends dad told him "'They don't charge anything to listen to the music'."- tatersalad1234567890
Words Escape You In The Literal "Heat" Of The Moment...
"A friend of mine is a teacher and her husband is known for his wit."
"She told this story to him:"
"One day at school a kid took the hall pass and returned reeking like smoke."
"She asked the kid if he’d been smoking and he denied it over and over."
"She was about to send him to the office when she noticed smoke coming from somewhere."
"She told the kid and he realized that he didn’t put his cig out completely and it was burning in his pants pocket."
"The kid noticed and frantically tried to put it out and someone finally poured water on it."
"Her husband sat listening to this with a weird look on his face."
"She asked him what was wrong."
“'What’s wrong???'"
"'This was probably the only chance you’ll have in your life to say literally, ‘liar,liar, pants on fire’ and you missed your chance'."- Luder714
On Fire No GIF by PEEKASSO
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Amazing What You Might Say A Few Drinks In...
"When I went to a renaissance faire once, I went to a beer tent and ordered a Newcastle Brown Ale (seemed the most fitting for the surroundings)."
"The beer wench, without skipping a beat, said, 'Everyone wants a Newcastle - no one wants to remodel!'"- jayhof52
Read The Room People!
"My dad wiped out when skiing down a mountain and lost a ski."
"After a few minutes of hunting for it, he gives up, slings the one remaining ski over a shoulder and starts walking down the mountain in his ski boots."
"About half-way down, another skier stops and goes 'Gee! Did you lose a ski?'"
"My dad instantly replied 'No, I was out for a walk and found one!'"- PeterJoAl
There's a reason your mother always told you to "use your words".
As clever remarks can have a much more lasting effect on people than a push or shove.