2020 has been intense and exhausting on so many levels it's not even funny ... unless semi-apocalyptic dumpster fires are your sense of humor. People are so over this year and it's not even autumn yet.
Thing is, being intense and exhausting doesn't necessarily mean it's all bad. Some of the most intense and exhausting things in the world eventually make you stronger and teach valuable lessons.
One Reddit user asked:
Normally we save these sorts of things for a year-end wrap up, but we're a little more than halfway through and now seems like a good time to write some stuff down before we forget.
Time Management
There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want
I feel this man. I thought that with all the extra time I had I would get so much more done. Turns out I just need to get a lot better at time management.
I always told myself I'd get more writing done without my day job. Then I lost my job from May to August... all that free time filled up fast... hardly any writing done.
Not Surprised, Just Disappointed
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Came here to say how disappointed I am to find out that there are so many stupid, hateful racist morons among my countrymen. I always knew there was an element of that in society. I never knew it was so many damned people, though.
Makes we wonder how we ever got beyond living in caves and flinging poo at each other.
I'd also add entitled to that list. It seems to be across the board; not just in any one demographic. I'm more shocked at seeing this trait in people aged 30 and up.
Grown ups are acting irresponsibly w/o regard for other people's rights or safety and throwing temper tantrums when they don't get their way. Worst of all are the ones who act like selfish, obnoxious a$holes and call themselves patriots for doing so. It baffles the mind.
Subject To Change
LIFE IS ALWAYS SUBJECT TO CHANGE. Get out there and do the things you want to do because one day you may not be able to.
- cshady
I remember my last day of high school, I was becoming burned out and wanted a break from school for at LEAST a week... this is not what I wanted
- krexcent
Trump's election in 2016 kicked my rear into gear. I figured he would make the US such an international pariah that Americans would no longer be able to travel. So in 2017 I traveled to 22 countries.
Looks like I was right; only a handful of countries want Americans now.
Not Exactly A Loner
That I'm nowhere as much of a loner as I thought I was. I may not be the most sociable person of the universe, but spending months holed up in my room with basically no IRL human contact got old fast.
People mistake introvert for no social interaction. We just don't like big crowds where everyone is yelling and you can't have a conversation and you don't know most people. What we want is a small close group of friends 1-5 other people we are very intimate and deep with.
90% of the introverts in my social circle feel this way. They still need some social contact now and then.
They just want to be able to do something low key 1-4x a month with friends, like invite them over for dinner, or play a boardgame.
Level Up
That the baseline on what I can handle has leveled up.
Same. I feel like my anxiety and depression got better compared to everyone else as I realised I am way stronger than I thought I was.
- pajamakitten
FaceChan
I remember my grandma telling me I shouldn't be a nurse on Facebook because I don't value "life" because I don't calculate my entire electoral vote on the single platform of being against abortion. Or her and her online friends bullying me for having a different, not racist opinion. I finally had to block grandma.
I still talk to my grandma, just not on Facebook.
- Azamaline
Everything Sucks But Its Pretty Great
This is going to come across as pretty insensitive, but life is pretty great right now. In 2020, the following things happened for my family:
- $20k raise
- Wife got a new job with a $15k raise
- Bought a new house
- Son with autism is making progress on speaking more clearly (because we're actually working on his speech therapy, unlike school and his speech therapist)
- Investments are doing great
- Weekly D&D game happens pretty reliably
- Alrik
I think 2020 shows us the great divide of the haves and have nots. Some people are really hurting right now. Others are totally fine or are thriving. You'll see more of one group than the other depending on your socioeconomic class.
- thelyfeaquatic
It's important to remember that while you're doing good and that's amazing, the reason Reddit is like this is because it's awful right now for a lot of if not most people.
You got a raise, but I lost my job to covid, had to pick up an extremely taxing Amazon job in the interim, my girlfriend is under extreme danger being locked down alone with untreatable depression, and I have to go into NYC twice a week soon for school, making me extremely vulnerable and unable to interact with anybody for a semester.
Just keep that in mind, I guess. I'm far from the only one
- arcrticphreese
A Hug
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Hug your spouse more. Man on man woman on woman man on woman whatever hug those who are there for you. Wife's an ER nurse I'm a firefighter working through covid non sense. The forced quarantine after contact with a positive pt has ripped us apart. It's hard to cope when your coping mechanism is behind glass out of reach. Hug your peeps peeps .
- lldumbcloudsll
2021 Won't Make It Better
That people will genuinely believe bad events will end just because the year is over.
Its overwhelming how many times I hear things like: "omg I cant wait for 2021, everything will be a fresh start" or "2020 can just leave"
Like, what do you really expect? All issues reset every January the 1st? Wtf.
- InconspicuousCupboard
So true. I fully expect January+ to be horrible. Violent protests over the US presidential election, riots, panic and stress reactions as people go back to more public living/offices, a resurgence of COVID. There is no way '21 is going to start well. I just hope it ends well.
- drwhogwarts
Nah I'm Good
I'm just as much of an introvert as I thought I was.
Don't get me wrong, I like hanging out with friends and I'm a pretty social person these days when I'm in a social environment. But I don't need it. I had a lot of people going stir crazy around me for lack of in person social interaction a month or two into quarantine. I never got there.
- muroid
Same with me. I don't miss seeing people, I don't miss coworkers, I don't miss friends in person. I got stir crazy from staying in place but having a change of scenery occasionally is all I need :)
For keeping in touch with peeps, chatting online is enough for me. Some of my friends and colleagues were up the wall wanting to find ways to hang out or do stuff but, seems like they've gotten better at managing it.
- emwo
Same here. Being happily married helps, though. I think if I were alone, I would be craving the occasional face to face interaction, but as it is, I'm just fine only interacting with people on the phone, or on a Zoom call.
- nakedonmygoat
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The old wives' tales.
They are the stories of legend.
I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.
Where did they originate?
WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!
You don't hear about them as much anymore.
It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.
But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.
Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:
"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"
"Wait an hour to swim after eating."
What a crock!
So many summer hours wasted.
I want revenge for that one.
Say Nothing
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"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."
LonelyMail5115
"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."
I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Say Something
"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."
Severe_Airport1426
"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."
crappycurtains
"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."
AlbinoShavedGorilla
Body Temps
"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."
chriseo22
"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."
"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."
apocalypticradish
Arms Down
"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."
Fatmouse84
10 Years Actually
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"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."
"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."
Gecko-911
I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.
This tale is haunting.
High/Low
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"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."
LeastFormal9366
"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."
IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI
The Cursed
"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."
"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."
SmoreOfBabylon
Stay In
"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."
"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."
worldbound0514
Dreams and Facts
"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."
"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."
mattshonestreddit
"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."
Darthdemented
Cracked
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"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."
Choice-Grapefruit-44
"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."
MacyTmcterry
I love my knuckles.
Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
Every now and then, a friend of ours might say something, or we might overhear a complete stranger say something that makes us stop in our tracks.
More often than not, what we can't believe we just heard is something so ridiculous, we can't help but put the person who said it in their place.
Other times, however, what we just heard might have stunned us silent because of how shockingly clever it was.
Resulting in our not wanting to scold or yell at someone, but rather give them a handshake.
Redditor SubmergingOriginal was curious to hear the sharpest and wittiest things they've ever heard, from friends and strangers alike, leading them to ask:
"Enough with the dumbest; what is the wittiest thing you've ever heard someone say?"
Don't Give Me So Much Credit...
'I was on a team at work that was on a project working insane overtime."
"One night after an 80-90 hour week, we were all sitting around the table trying to finish up so we could go home."
"Around 11, my buddy's wife called, dubious about the hours he'd been keeping."
"We heard her through the line - 'are you cheating on me?'"
"Exasperated, he looked at our boss, then replied 'honey, if I was cheating on you, I would have been home by now'."- lionbatcher
Eternal Optimism...
"Asked a blind guy if he'd been blind his whole life."
"He said 'Not yet'."- Feeling_Mode_6465
Free time Isn't The Only Thing He Has On His Hands...
"My brother got a vasectomy and when the doctor was releasing him and giving him instructions (with the nurse listening in), one of the orders was to 'come back and have a follow-up appointment after you’ve ejaculated 30 times'.”
"Without missing a beat my brother asked 'what time do you open tomorrow?'”
"The nurse couldn’t keep it together after hearing that."- UtahUtopia
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Double Whammy!
"My pal uses the phrase 'he doesn’t look strong enough to carry information' and it cracks me up every time."
"Calling someone stupid and weak in one fell swoop."- JennyW93
Can't Hide Your DNA...
'Whenever I jokingly insult my mum, she says 'that must be where you get it from'."
"She cracked the code."
"I can never offend her without offending myself."- JennyW93
Self-Sufficient!
"My brother was a line cook at a New Orleans restaurant."
"My mom was in town, staying at a fancy hotel, and he stopped by after work, still wearing his kitchen whites."
"He was reading a newspaper in the lobby waiting for her to come down when the shocked lobby manager sputtered at him, 'MAY I HELP YOU!?!?'
"He answered, 'thanks, but I know how to read',” and went back to his paper."- jobrody
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A Miracle!
"My brother-in-law’s comment."
"The entire family went out for my mother’s 80th birthday and after the meal we all went to a local park, largely occupied by the elderly, to rest."
"My mother needed crutches at this point, and they were resting against her bench."
"My 10-year-old niece, who looked like every starving waif image from Dickens, grabbed the crutches and started hobbling round the park."
"All the OAPs were following her progress with looks of pity until my brother ran up behind her, and kicked away the crutches."
"There was an audible gasp from round the park and then my niece picked the crutches back up and started chasing my brother, clearly intending to hit him."
"In the confused silence my brother-in-law’s voice rang out 'Praise be! She can walk again!'"
"We still think this was the highlight of the birthday celebrations."- DdraigGwyn
Still Legal, Whichever Way You Cut It...
"I picked up my pleasantly tipsy boyfriend from a nightclub."
"We were stopped by the Police for a random breath test."
"They asked me my age, and I said, 33."
"My bf blurted out '33? You told me you were 22'."
"Police just laughed and let me go."- Aggravating-Corgi379
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A Bit Too On The Nose?
"Business law class in college years ago, talking about the issues that black Americans had before the Civil Rights."
"Amendment, trying to travel through the south with the discrimination so rampant, trying to find restaurants to serve them and decent lodgings."
"My instructor was posing a hypothetical: 'So you pull up out front of this place, you're exhausted from driving for hours, and you see the sign out front says 'Ku Klux Klan Motel'."
"'What would you expect to find there?'"
"Without missing a beat, from the back of the room came this gem: "'Extra sheets in every room?'"- NedsAtomicDB
Not Yet, Anyway...
"I was working with my friend and his dad."
"My friend (26) heard an ice cream truck near where we were working."
"He asked his dad if he could have a couple dollars."
"His dad asked, 'what for?'"
"My friend told his dad that there was an ice cream truck in the neighborhood, and that they were playing music."
"My friends dad told him "'They don't charge anything to listen to the music'."- tatersalad1234567890
Words Escape You In The Literal "Heat" Of The Moment...
"A friend of mine is a teacher and her husband is known for his wit."
"She told this story to him:"
"One day at school a kid took the hall pass and returned reeking like smoke."
"She asked the kid if he’d been smoking and he denied it over and over."
"She was about to send him to the office when she noticed smoke coming from somewhere."
"She told the kid and he realized that he didn’t put his cig out completely and it was burning in his pants pocket."
"The kid noticed and frantically tried to put it out and someone finally poured water on it."
"Her husband sat listening to this with a weird look on his face."
"She asked him what was wrong."
“'What’s wrong???'"
"'This was probably the only chance you’ll have in your life to say literally, ‘liar,liar, pants on fire’ and you missed your chance'."- Luder714
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Amazing What You Might Say A Few Drinks In...
"When I went to a renaissance faire once, I went to a beer tent and ordered a Newcastle Brown Ale (seemed the most fitting for the surroundings)."
"The beer wench, without skipping a beat, said, 'Everyone wants a Newcastle - no one wants to remodel!'"- jayhof52
Read The Room People!
"My dad wiped out when skiing down a mountain and lost a ski."
"After a few minutes of hunting for it, he gives up, slings the one remaining ski over a shoulder and starts walking down the mountain in his ski boots."
"About half-way down, another skier stops and goes 'Gee! Did you lose a ski?'"
"My dad instantly replied 'No, I was out for a walk and found one!'"- PeterJoAl
There's a reason your mother always told you to "use your words".
As clever remarks can have a much more lasting effect on people than a push or shove.