Oppenheim Bernhard/Getty Images

It can feel strange when someone forces a secret on you. Now, asking for a secret in middle school about who your best friend might be in love with is one thing and can bring a group of friends closer together. Getting told when you're both adults about a traumatic, horrifying family affair is a little different and a little more scarring.

And sad.

*WARNING: Entries may involve self-harm and familial incest.*


Reddit user, u/DiceSided7, wanted people to discuss the disturbed when they asked:

What's the most disturbing secret you've been told?

Meet Dad's New Partner

Dad introduced me to his girlfriend when I was 15 years old.

"Now, don't tell your Mama."

Wrong_Answer_Willie

Not Really Yours

A co-worker told me her 2nd child wasn't her husbands.

Did not need that information.

ignoremsmedia

Sowing Your Wild Oats

My father had 6 children from 4 different women. One he knocked up when he was married to his first wife . He put the child up for adoption in secret so his wife wouldn't know. The only people who knew were his mom and dad and the mother of the child's family. He lied to his current wife about the child when his second wife found the papers in his office while they were going through a divorce.

30 years later, 23andme reunited all and he found out quickly this "secret" wasn't really so secret. Everyone in the family knew and just didn't say anything.

The child put up for adoption was me. What really sucks for him is if he had just been open about it it may have saved him many years of pain.

Erovian_MD

Killing In Defense

A guy I hooked up with in college had a breakdown when we were black out drunk and essentially admitted to killing a guy who had taken advantage of his little sister. He was a total wiener of a guy who was always trying to hype himself up and exaggerate to be a bigger, better, "manlier" person so I didn't think much of it at the time. The timing would have made him a teenager and the man a full fledged adult. It just felt like another bullsh-t story he was always telling.

But sometimes I think back and wonder if there's any truth to it.

Augusta13

A Dark Origin Story

In 1994 a now retired judge told me he and two childhood friends were responsible for the accidental death of a classmate down by a creek where they were playing one day. He had pretty much kept it to himself for a lifetime.

justusethatname

Life Inspires Television

I've told the story on here before, but a girl I worked with once told me about her first love. They dated for a while, fell madly in love and lost their virginities to each other. Her family situation was weird. Her parents weren't married, but when her dad was in town, her parents were a couple and when he wasn't they weren't. Well one of the times that he was in town, she introduced him to her boyfriend. They got along and got to talking and he asked about the kids family.

After the kid went home, her dad told her she couldn't see him anymore. Turns out he was the kid's father. She'd unknowingly fallen in love with and lost her virginity to her half brother.

And yes, I know this also happened on an episode of House. I was told this story back in '99 before that show was a thing.

skeletorsleftlung

A Literal Family Affair

I found it out myself.

My immediate older sister is cheating on her husband with my oldest sister's husband. Both the couple seem to be in a happy and healthy marriage with kids. Wtf!

sleepdaddy

Getting Close With Family

My friend was telling me about how jealous she was of her boyfriend spending time with one of his female cousins instead of her.

Me: "I mean, that's his family though, don't you think you're being a bit psycho getting jealous of him spending time with his own cousin?"

Her: "Well he slept his other one!"

Me: "............I'm sorry, WHAT??!"

Turns out he'd lost his virginity to a different female cousin when they were teenagers

ariannegreyjoy

Photo by Louis Hansel on Unsplash

Some years ago, I had to advise a college friend to stop chasing the girl he was interested in at the time. She'd already turned him down. Explicitly. At least two or three times.

He wouldn't take no for an answer and didn't see anything wrong with his behavior.

Perhaps he'd seen too many movies where the guy eventually breaks through the girl's defenses and essentially coerces her into going out with him?

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Caleb Woods/Unsplash

Parents make mistakes. We want to believe that parents are doing there very best to raise their kids, but sometimes they do more harm than good.

Research into childhood trauma didn't actually begin until the 1970s, so we don't have as much knowledge about our mental health as adults as we might like.

However, a study that followed 1,420 from 1992 to 2015 found conclusive results about childhood trauma:

"'It is a myth to believe that childhood trauma is a rare experience that only affects few,' the researchers say."
"Rather, their population sample suggests, 'it is a normative experience—it affects the majority of children at some point.'"
"A surprising 60 percent of those in the study were exposed to at least one trauma by age 16. Over 30 percent were exposed to multiple traumatic events."

Not all of the things our parents do that were not so helpful technically classify as trauma, but it definitely has an effect on us as we get older.

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Ann on Unsplash

Breaking up is something that never gets easier.

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On the outside, so many professions and careers look glamorous, financially enticing, and fun.

Often we sit back in our own lives and wallow in our dead-end jobs with that "wish I could do that for a living mentality!"

But if you look a little closer or, much like Dorothy Gale in OZ, just wait for a Toto to push the curtain back, you'll see that a lot more is going on behind the scenes.

And the shenanigans we don't see, make all that fun... evaporate.

So many careers and high power industries are built on a foundation of lies, backstabbing, and stress. And not in that fun "Dynasty" way.

That quiet, dead-end gig may not be so bad after all.

Redditor MethodicallyDeep wanted hear all the tea about certain careers, by asking:

What is a secret in your industry that should be talked about?
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