Christmas comes every year. So do birthdays.
And that means another year of getting thoughtless gifts, useless stuff you don't need and socks.
All the socks.
Redditor diswell asked:
"What's the biggest 'WTF' gift you've ever received?"
A wholesome mom.
One year I came home for Christmas and my mom had been asking me what I wanted for Christmas and I told her I didn't want anything, I had everything I need and not to get me anything.
Well, come Christmas morning there were a number of gifts with my name on them.. we always hand out all the gifts first and we each had a pretty decent pile..
We always start with the youngest and go up so I was like 3rd or 4th in line, and everyone had pretty normal gifts.. gloves, PJs, usual winter gift stuff.
My turn comes up, I probably have maybe 8 or 9 small packages to open. I open the first one and it's a box of Hamburger Helper.
I laughed and was like, uh thanks Mom..and then I continue.. after 3 boxes of Hamburger/Tuna Helper there's a couple cans of Chef Boyardee and Spaghettios and I'm like.. do you think I'm not eating or something, or are you trying to kill me?
What's with all the random food?
Her response? "No, I just felt bad that you didn't have anything to open on Christmas! You can go put those back in the cabinet when you're done."
Thanks, mom.
Outback Steak House? Worth it.
A co-worker of mine won a radio show contest where people were invited to describe the crappiest office gift they ever got.
My friend was the secretary of an IT company and her boss gave her a plastic bowl for Christmas. And it wasn't even a nice plastic bowl.
The first time she put it in the microwave, it exploded.
She won the contest and got a $100 gift card to Outback Steak House. Her boss insisted she take him since it was his crappy gift that caused her to win the contest.
- EGoldenRule
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Now THAT'S cheap.
My uncle is notoriously cheap. One year he gave me a magazine that had Ichiro Suzuki on the cover. It was a free magazine (as it stated on the bottom of the cover).
Another year he also gave me a free t-shirt he had gotten for running a race.
Possibly the best, was the birthday gift he gave my dad one year- a McDonalds Happy Meal toy.
- BooksandPandas
Good riddance.
Maybe not the most WTF, but at my old company, we had a secret Santa gift exchange. The manager drew my name, and gifted me a very clearly used zoodler.
He proceeded to explain, in front of everyone, that he though I would have more use for it, as he only ate "real noodles".
I don't work there anymore.
- lola__bunny
Kinda cool but really weird.
An Egyptian pharaoh pen when I was in middle school. It was all gold colored, and the pen barrel stuck out between his legs.
Needless to say i was mocked mercilessly by my classmates for having this massive Egyptian dong pen.
- artnerdhippie
What size?
I have been disabled my entire life. It affects the footwear choices in my life. My mom has bought me dozens of pairs of slippers that I cannot wear. Sometimes multiple pairs per year. I have given up at this point. I just give them away.
When I was a teen, before I moved out she also had given me embroidered dish towels with weird sayings.
She also refuses to actually get my damn size and just holds clothes in the air and looks at them to decide if it looks like it should fit.
- anniemdi
Hope it was good cheese.
A cheese and champagne gift set that had the champagne and most of the other goodies taken out of it. So cheese in a mostly empty box.
- haggisforthesoul
A good rat-boi.
A pet rat, based on me having told the gifter that when I was in elementary school I liked the school's pet rat. I was 26 when I received this gift.
Rat turned out to be a very good rat-boi and we mourned his loss approximately 2 years later.
- jchrysostom
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Um....what?
I randomly went to some extended family Christmas event and they gave me a woven basket. Within ten minutes, they had asked for the basket back. It "meant something" to them?? I didn't really care, I thought it was odd and funny.
- Impairedmilkman13
Ok, Grandma.
Christmas, 1993. I was eleven.
My grandma gave me one half of a pool cue.
She gifted the other half to my then-8-year-old brother.
Grandma: "See? You can only use it if you two cooperate and share!"
We did not own a pool table.
- CaptainWisconsin
Dang.
For my 6th grade class Kris Kringle, I received a pack of three tennis balls and a handmade voodoo doll of one of my closest friends. The voodoo doll was constructed of fabric, taped together with sticky tape with sticks inside the limbs so I could 'break' her bones and the face drawn on with a sharpie. It was not specified what the tennis balls were for.
The kid who made me the doll was notorious for his disturbing and unusual behaviour and antics so I wasn't completely surprised by the horrifying gift. Needless to say, he was forced to write me an apology note.
- MadamePandemonium
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Salad spinner?
Ok. So, for context my dad was a pretty self-destructive alcoholic, and would often do his Christmas shopping towards the last minute, but not like to go to malls or places that had a lot of variety or choice.
One year he gave me a very carelessly wrapped package. It contained a very crappy remote-control car, also not with any batteries (which is a problem in Australia because everything is closed on Xmas Day haha). I was 26 years old, and had shown ZERO interest in cars. And I realised a few days later he got it from the local petrol station.
Another one was when my mum got me a salad spinner as a semi-gag gift. This was due to her being forgetful and somehow getting me confused with my younger sister, who had tis stupid joke whenever we would all go shopping to point out the salad spinners and pretending to get very excited.
I opened the gift and went "what the?!" and mum went "get it?! It's a SALAD SPINNERRRRR!" in a pretty decent impression of the way my sister would do it. I turned to my sister, gave it to her and said "I think this one was meant for you..."
- TubaDude84
Weird family bonding but ok....
Last Saturday was my birthday and we decided to celebrate at my grandparents' house. My cousin shows up forgetting it's my birthday runs back outside to the car and comes back with a take out box. She tell me happy birthday and gives it to me. I open it and it's one sigliar frozen cheese ravioli.
Then my dad walks over picks up the ravioli smells it and says if I don't want it he'll take. So then my brother wants to smell it so then everyone was passing around the ravioli smelling it.
- Subtly_Existing
Some "gift".
One year for Christmas my grandma gave me the free socks and disposable toothbrush she got on a flight. From her trip to Europe with one of my sisters.
- BabyBelarus
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That's sketchy AF.
So I had a therapist (for anxiety and ptsd) who realized that I was really good with kids, so she asked me to help at her ADHD kids group. I knew it was sketchy, one should never work at their therapist, but I needed the money and making music with the kids was so much fun. So every two weeks she'd give me 150€.
But after some time things changed and she sort of used therapy hours to tell me about her problems and I felt, I had to go, because she was more interested in who I was good for (she tried to set me up with other clients to become friends, because she thought I'd be good for them).
So I just waited for the last straw to tip me over the edge and then one day, instead of giving me the 150€ she usually paid me she instead gave me a WEIRD CELLULITE MASSAGE THING that she swore helped so much and literally said: "You could be such a pretty girl". I was just dumbfounded at what the hell she was thinking. I thought about what to say for a few days and then quite literally broke up with her. I had to calm her down and she didn't understand why that gift was just a big wtf.
But hey, I have a much better therapist now, she knows what is appropriate and is awesome.
- CuriousKathie
I had one of these with my Nana that turned into a fucking Hallmark life lesson.
High School, 1998 or so. At some point in October or so I mentioned casually during a visit that my bedroom was chilly at night. Come Christmas, I open my gift from Nana. A space heater.
As a teenager who was hoping for video games or CDs or other such things, I put on the forced-smile rictus and thanked her for the gift while internally bemoaning all the loot that could have been. I must have been grossly unconvincing because she got a bit anxiously-defensive, "You said your room was cold! I thought it'd help out!"
Later that night we head home, I plug the space heater in when I go to bed because why not?
My God. My God, you all!
The DIFFERENCE that space heater made. Actual f'king comfortable sleep for once. No waking up halfway through the night shivering, or getting shocked awake by my foot straying too far from out of the covers.
The next time I went to her house I gave Nana a giant hug, and told her how much better my room was at night with that space heater, and gave her an actual genuine thank you. I didn't even mind the following "I told you it'd help!"
Ever since that Christmas, when I get something practical for Christmas from Nana, I thank her sincerely, because it WILL be useful. I still use that space heater twenty years after the fact, too.
- Strawberrycocoa
It might be the thought that counts, but maybe some of these people should have thought a little more.
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When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
homer simpson episode 23 GIF
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
Disney World GIF
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.