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The Biggest Culture Shocks People Have Experienced At Someone's House

Reddit user mango-chocolate asked: 'What is the biggest cultural shock you experienced when going to someone else's house?'

Minimalist modern kitchen
Photo by Adam Winger on Unsplash

No two family homes are exactly alike, but some households are wildly different, from how they're decorated to what the family eats to how the family members treat each other.

What's interesting is how two people could be best friends and lead completely different lifestyles when they go home, but their friend might never know that until they go for a visit.

Redditor mango-chocolate asked:

"What is the biggest cultural shock you experienced when going to someone else's house?"

Bad Hostesses

"This is the strangest experience I’ve ever had at someone’s home. I worked with this young Cuban gal as a waitress while I was studying at University."

"She mentioned that her sister needed some help with Math in her Nursing program so I offered to go over and tutor."

"I knew it was a multi-generational house with parents, adult children, grandparents, great-grandparents and babies. When I arrived at the house, only the sister was home."

"She invited me in and started unloading the refrigerator of leftovers and asked if I would like to have some of this, some of that, etc."

"I was genuinely not hungry but she was super persistent and made us some food anyway. She offered me a drink, but I just wanted water. She made herself a Cuban coffee and insisted I have one too."

"Then my friend comes home, and looks at us studying. In front of me, I have snacks, water, and a coffee."

"She begins screaming at her sister in Spanish. I can barely make it out, but she’s mad that her sister didn’t offer me anything to drink or eat. I explained I wasn’t hungry and I had two drinks in front of me, but she was still mad at her sister."

"Their parents came home and they started yelling about the same thing and accusing their daughters of being bad hostesses! I felt bad, and I somehow allowed five drinks to served to me and so much food, I was stuffed for the rest of the day."

"The whole experience was a weird combination of feeling guilty or like I may have insulted them, but also feeling loved and appreciated."

"When my friend introduced me to her family, she introduced me as the woman that would carry all her trays at work while she was pregnant so she didn’t have to lift them. I can’t believe she had even remembered that. I hadn’t until she brought it up. They made me like an honored guest in their home."

- mydogdoesntcuddle

"I’m Cuban. Not offering food or drink to your guest is extremely rude and shameful. And we mean FOOD AND DRINK. Not little finger sandwiches and tea. This even extends to a maintenance person that comes by, or a mail carrier, etc. it’s like grandma culture on steroids."

"Additionally, our intrapersonal communication style is extremely loud and can seem aggressive to others, so they might not have actually been yelling at each other."

"My stepfather is a white American from NYC, and when he saw the way my mother and I spoke to each other when we first started living together he’d constantly be worried asking why we were fighting; we’d have to explain we weren’t fighting, just casually talking."

- Asleep_Sherbet_3013

A Lack of Reading Material

"I hung out with my college roommates' family around Christmas. There were NO books in the house, none. This was early aughts."

"She told me her parents didn't want challenging books in their house to make the kids feel stupid."

"Her parents were professors at our college in the EDUCATION department."

"She (my roommate) and her siblings were f**king stupid."

- angel_inthe_fire

"I have always had a ton of books in almost every room growing up. It came as a shock going to someone's home and NOT seeing a book anywhere."

- GeekyBookWorm87

Loving Families

"When I was a teen, I was genuinely shocked to see that other families actually loved each other and wanted to interact and say nice things to each other."

"I kept expecting it to turn dark, and when it didn’t, I had no idea what to do and felt completely ashamed and out of place."

- MTBeanerschnitzel

Far Too Strict

"As a kid, I visited some friends who had scary 'yes sir/no sir' fathers who were quick to use a belt on them."

"None of those guys turned out well as adults, I might add."

"The funny thing is, my dad was an Army platoon sergeant, yet he was a jovial and easy-going father."

- p38-lightning

Empty Plates Only

"My friend's parents would make them finish their meals, even if they said they were full."

"The meals looked huge to me, and my friend was overweight. It felt depressing."

"If I was full at home, I'd never be pressured to eat absolutely everything if I didn't want to."

- nightsofthesunkissed

An American Breakfast

"I'm a first-generation American (Asian). Due to TV cereal commercials while watching Saturday morning cartoons, I grew up believing that White people would simultaneously have a glass of milk and a glass of OJ in the morning (as part of this complete breakfast)."

"You can imagine my disappointment the day after sleepovers at friends' homes."

- cloudedarcher

"My mom (white) literally did this. I'm not sure if she got it from commercials or something else because she had a weird idea of nutrition on other stuff too, but literally every morning my breakfast included an eight-ounce glass of milk and a four-ounce glass of orange juice."

"The combination is actually terrible. OJ and milk don't mix well in your stomach and drinking them together always made me feel uncomfortable, but it was the kind of household where I got in trouble for not finishing the whole meal."

"A pretty common weekday morning breakfast was a bagel with cream cheese and jam on both halves, some sliced-up strawberries, milk, and OJ. It's way more food than I'd eat for breakfast on a typical day as an adult and I was often uncomfortably full from it as a kid."

- SeaworthySwarth

Not So Messy

"I was raised by two women (my mother and my dad's wife) whose notion of cleanliness was such that rooms were sterile and it looked to me like the point was to make it look like no one lived in our house."

"By contrast, I was used to being called and feeling like I was a 'messy' person because none of those things are priorities to me."

"The first time I went into the house of someone who was truly messy... I'm talking leftover candles from a birthday party that happened two weeks ago still on the dining-room table messy, basement so full of junk the notion of separate rooms has been made abstract... it rearranged the way I looked at myself a little."

- BananasPineapples05

The Importance of Snack Time

"I remember going to a friend’s house after school we sat at the kitchen island and her mom gave us apple wedges with peanut butter and they talked about school."

"I was blown away that her mom just gave out snacks and was interested in her life, I thought it was probably a special occasion since I was there."

"Then I experienced snacks at other friends’ houses."

"I told my mom about the apple wedges and peanut butter once and she screamed at me and said if I wanted a perfect family, why don’t I go live with them? She worked full time and I cooked pasta for my brother and me most nights, there was nothing resembling snacks in the house. We just had meals and drank water."

"As an adult, I have a snacking problem."

- yokizururu

...Excuse Me?

"Back in high school, I visited a friend's house and had to use the bathroom."

"I asked her where the toilet paper was in the bathroom and she said, 'We don't really wipe our butts in this house.'"

- Silent-Bird-4474

Always Say 'I Love You'

"People not saying 'I love you' before leaving or hanging up the phone. I was always taught to say 'I love you' to family before hanging up the phone or saying goodbye."

"You never know when your last goodbye will be so let the last thing you say to a loved one be 'I love you.'"

"A tradition I continue to practice to this day. Yet I think I was the only one who did that in my friend group."

- Herpypony

"My family never said I love you growing up. I asked my mom about it not long ago, and she said her dad never told her, so she didn't know to say it to her kids."

"One of my sisters started saying it, and making us say it, when we were in our 20s. It felt so awkward and weird to say it, but I forced myself. Now, 20 years later, we always say it to each other, and it feels normal. I should ask my sister about why and how she got the idea to start saying it to us."

"It seems so odd to me now that my parents never said I love you to me or my sisters growing up. They showed us, but never said it."

- Zaltara_The_Red

Run Away!

"When my friend's Russian grandmother chased me with a shoe and yelled at me in Russian."

"I didn’t know why she was angry but all my friend would say is that it had something to do with where I put my shoes when I entered the house."

- ArmyRepresentative88

An Awe-Inspiring Breakfast

"I went to the neighbor's house for breakfast one morning before the bus. We were good friends. She's Hindu, and her family is as well."

"It was a culture shock to see and smell the amazing food we had that morning. It wasn't the normal pancakes, eggs, and bacon for Americans."

"I think it was potato latkas with some delicious green spread. God, I wanted to eat all of it, and her mom was so happy I loved it."

"Never before in my life had I had such a different breakfast for me. It was shock and awe I experienced."

- Apprehensive-Skill34

Different Cultures, Different Accessories

"I’m an international student in the USA. I lived with my grand uncle for six months, and one of the cultural shocks that surprised me was that he had carpeted floors in his bathrooms. And also the lack of bidets in America."

- cassiemoonnana

A Kid's Dream

"I went to a friend's house at maybe age nine and was floored that she didn't share a bedroom with her little sister. On top of this, she also had a double bed and a small TV in her room hooked up to a PlayStation 2."

- LittleMsBlue

The Love of the Family

"I learned that other people's parents smiled at them, were nice to them, and seemed to enjoy having them around."

"I rarely experienced any of that. I thought everyone's parents were angry all the time and didn't like them much."

- t_portch

"I had a friend over recently and she thought it was necessary to tell our teenage son how lucky he was to have parents who love him (this was after a few beers)."

"I was kinda taken aback by the comment, given the realization that some parents don't dote on their kids, including my friend. Apparently some don't..."

- MainInTheMT

"Same. I had a best friend who was from Croatia. Her parents loved her and her brother so much, and they definitely weren’t afraid to show it."

"Her dad would hug her every night when he got home. It was absolutely shocking to me."

"I also would intentionally go to her house after school because her mom would have a FEAST waiting for us."

- NuriMoons

You never know what you're going to find before visiting someone else's home, from different decorations and food, to different beliefs about how a family should treat each other.

In a way, it's heartwarming to know that these Redditors were exposed to these different lifestyles, perhaps especially those who didn't know that families could show each other love, so they might have higher standards for their relationships in the future.

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley

Remember

"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt

Imagination

"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."

RedditbOiiiiiiiiii

"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."

monobarreller

Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."

– GTFOakaFOD

"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip

Yikes!

"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User

"Oh."

– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"

Sensations

Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."

PeachesnPain

Recovery

"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."

good_golly99

Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."

rayrayrayray

Free

The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."

TooReDTooHigh

This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.

Shocked

Giphy

"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."

Admirable_Buyer6528

The SOB

"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”

1-cupcake-at-a-time

Colors

"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"

Hannah_LL7

"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"

huntokarrr

The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."

Fluffy-Hotel-5184

Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."

Hot-Refrigerator6583

Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.

Shopping

"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.