Everyone has a few special secret talents.
The only reason we keep them quiet is because they don't make us money.
So we all have efficient party tricks.
It's just like having a brain full of useless information.
But you never know when that info may land you on Jeopardy.
So how useless is it all?
Our silly skills could get us on some reality show.
RedditorBilla_420wanted everyone to share about all the talents they possess that don't seem to get them any richer in life. They asked:
"What is the most useless skill you have??"
I have no hidden skill. I'm boring. But tell me yours.
SCORE!
christopher walken dancing GIFGiphy"Was a janitor for 2 years and got pretty good at sliding trash cans back into place from across the room."
DasanLit
creator...
"The random crap I can make using boxes and tape."'
LacingMaShoes
"A soul like my own, I fashioned a little device to hold my phone on a curtain holder so I could watch shows in bed easier."
NotCallum
"Do you have kids? This is far from useless. My kids love making things out of boxes. Boats, trains, planes, dens, spaceships."
celaconacr
One Hand?
"I can tie my shoe lace with one hand in under 5 seconds."
BobbyLeFourbe
"Teach me now 🤨."
Billa_420
"This isn't useless at all. I've been made late to meetings multiple times due to my inability to properly handle shoelaces of all things."
Abelysk
Blow
"I can blow a sound like and as loud as a whistle. Which would be great if I was a referee in sports or a gym teacher, but neither situation has ever come up."
ghettospread
"I can make a bird sound whistle using my mouth while it doesn't look like I'm whistling. Or it's just a high pitched whistle. It may sound like a R/that happened but I tricked a class I was in into thinking there was a bird in the room."
Tyflowshun
Scream
Rocking Out Heavy Metal GIFGiphy"I spent years practicing singing and metal screaming. I am not in a band. I do not sing in front of people. It's literally just so I can sing to my favourite songs."
Says_Pointless_Stuff
I wanna tie my shoes one handed! That's awesome!
With the Beat
U Know Flirt GIF by WimbledonGiphy"I can move my eyebrows in time to any music and also do the worm with my eyebrows."
Salty_Ad12
Good Night
"Sleeping for 16 hours."
milky_monkey
"Same lol. If I get hydrated just right, no drinking, earplugs in and just the right amount of physical exhaustion, I can clock in between 14-16 hours of sleep and wake up feeling like absolute pile of crap. It usually takes a litre of water straight and tar-black coffee to bring me to wakefulness."
Yoink_Tactics
Lucky
"Finding 4 leaf clovers. I feel like all of my life's luck was concentrated into this one cool but useless skill."
thinkrrr
"My cousin wins almost every contest she enters. But she can’t find a four-leaf clover whenever she looks for one. It’s such a weird inverse of your skill."
Songs4Soulsma
"Same!!!! All the old (now dead) people on the paternal side of my family would literally spend hours looking for them, I'd walk up and look down and pick one, "'s this what you're looking for?' even on my grandma's grave I found one, it was hilarious, it pissed her off the most that she could never find one."
pagethatsme
Magical Powers
"No matter what line I stand in at the super market, the other line WILL move faster. If I switch lines, the old lady who is now in front of me will unquestionably need to count up a thousand dimes for payment, and the guy that used to stand behind me in the old line, will wink at me as he leaves."
NomenNescio13
Stacked
clean up kitchen GIFGiphy"Balancing things on top of each other- I don’t know why I started it, but I can stack just about anything that’s put in front of me. Does not help me in the slightest at my white collar office job lol."
BungeeBarrels
Ok. I can balance things. Didn't realize that was a skill... go me!
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Baseball Fail GIFKeep Trying
"Just because you’re having sex doesn’t mean you’ll become good at it without a remarkable amount of trial and error."
gotogarrett
"More than trial and error, you gotta ask your partner how it was, what they liked and didn’t like and what they want to try. Being able to have an open and honest conversation about sex with your partner makes it so much better."
Odd-Butterscotch-495
"Agreed. An ex friend of mine boasted that he was great in bed because his body count was over 50. Bro, if your body count is that high at that age, it means no one’s coming back for more."
Fabulous_Parking66
Wait
"When you have that mindset you won’t ever get the chance. It’s not that big of a deal and not something you need to put that much pressure on that you’re fretting about it like this. It’ll come, just be you and don’t sweat about it. I was 21 when I lost my virginity and all my friends were 15-18 when they lost theirs. I don’t regret when it happened and I don’t feel like I was late or missing out, it just happened when it happened."
chivesr
Together
Giphy"That two bellies rubbed together at just the right angle can make a loud fart noise. Funny tho when it does happen for the first time."
Equivalent_Squash
I hate that noise. Gross. It's confusing.
Style
masturbation im horny GIFGiphy"How you pleasure yourself can be a huuuge influence on your sex life."
User Deleted
It'a All New
"Instead of just after virginity, after years of having sex and looking back at my first time where my partner was much more experienced than me, I’ve realised that pretty much all sex with a new person, virginity or not, feels new. I was really hung up on being good at it when I should’ve treated it as a learning experience for the next time."
joleph
Too Much Porn
"That foreplay is SUPER important. You don't see it too much in a lot of porn so until you get into the bedroom you don't really consider the prep. Often times you just see people going at it which is great and all but everything is much better when both parties are warmed up."
FederalTiddyApraiser
It makes sense...
"That I was allergic to latex."
ideletedmyusername21
"Same. Friends would talk about having sex multiple times a day, and I was over here wondering WHY they would ever put themselves through that. It took days to recover. Someone finally mentioned a latex allergy, and it all made sense."
OnceAStudent__
"Omg this. Except my allergy was fairly mild. It meant peeling skin a couple days later. Literally took me years to find out why that was."
Ulfran
Noises Off
Grocery Store Reaction GIF by TravisGiphy"The large amount of sounds that can be produced by the human body."
SnooWoofers455
Take note friends. Nobody is perfect out of the gate. Take you time. Do it right.
I think America certainly has a strong work ethic. We know how to work and win.
Getting Around
Civil Rights Equality GIF by INTO ACTIONGiphy"Accessibility code for buildings. I come from a country where disability is looked upon like a crime or fault. USA does an amazing job making things accessible. I haven’t seen all of USA but majority of the places has amazing system."
snreddit87
The Backbone
"Our public libraries are a real backbone for the country."
"Andrew Carnegie's groundwork in building the institution of free libraries, even in small towns, set a precedent that we wouldn't fathom today but couldn't live without. They often serve not only as an information exchange but as cultural hub, art gallery, performing arts center, tax aid, voter registration, job resources, etc. in communities."
"Plus they're one of the only places you can just exist for hours indoors without the expectation you must buy something.And I feel like they've adapted to the ever-changing needs of their patrons in modern times faster in the US than most places."
"'A library outranks any other one thing a community can do to benefit its people. It is a never failing spring in the desert.' -Andrew Carnegie"
fadedVHS
'restore' or 'create'
"Valuing actual wilderness in places like national parks. Here in England, they will 'restore' or 'create' natural habitats, which is sort-of nice, but they are almost like zoos. They are too small to survive by themselves so they are actively maintained."
"And in some English national parks, they actually allow housing developments as long as the architectural design is sympathetic. Here, 'countryside"'means farms. There is still a notion in the USA of protecting some large wilderness areas from development."
anon5005
Nicotine Fiends
"The rate of smoking cigarettes. We do very little well in the US when it comes to overall health, but we are light years better than most places when it comes to the prevalence of cigarette smoking. Hardcore anti smoking adds + laws of inconvenience + social stigma really did work."
pasta_sauce87
Hollywood
Movie Theater Reaction GIF by CBSGiphy"Films. Don't get me wrong, the US can put out some bad films, but the best ones I've seen are usually American."
ConcreteGardoki
We do do films well. That is a big plus.
Family
Kids Playing GIF by moodmanGiphy"The United States adopts more children than the rest of the world combined."
noodles43r
The Menu
"Burgers. Motherfreakin' burgers."
ProfessorRoyHinkley
"I'd expand that to sandwiches in general. Burgers, Philly cheese steaks, Reubens, subs, clubs, chopped cheese, po'boys, just this whole sandwich spectrum. Americans just took sandwich concepts from across the globe and ran with them."
gurnard
Natural Beauty
"I've always envied your wildlife. I'm from England and the only large wild animals (other than fish) we have are deer, boar and foxes. And they're incredibly rare. I've always thought it was so cool one country could have bears, moose, cougars, alligators, panthers, bison/buffalo, etc."
gateman33
Quickies
"Gas stations like QuikTrip, where they have clean bathrooms, lighted parking lots, free air for your tires, ten different coffees on tap, beer, hotdogs, any soft drink or snack you want, the list goes on. In other countries -- you're not gonna believe this -- their gas stations only sell... gas."
Blort_McFluffuhgus
POWER
bill nye GIFGiphy"The US is an absolute science powerhouse. The technology we come out with has touched the lives of nearly every person on the planet."
AmericanHoneycrisp
Welcome
"I say this as an immigrant who came to this country, so perhaps take it with a grain of salt. But it truly gives people a second chance at life. My life would be nowhere near as good as it is right now if I were back in my home country."
Porongas1993
Maybe America isn't the hot mess a lot of people think it is. We'll see...
Sex is fun. And when the sex stopped in my relationships... so did the fun. But that is just me.
A Certain Era
Very Funny Oops GIF by America's Funniest Home VideosGiphy"I'm over 80."
Head-like-a-carp
"There’s a lot of people that are going to be real shocked once they hit their 70s."
KarateKid72
Ruin
"Our second child has ruined her sex drive. Intimacy is still there but extremely infrequently. I've learned how much that intimacy brings to the relationship, it feels very lonely and although I know it's not her fault, it can still make you feel like she's not attracted to me anymore. It can be pretty lonely too if you go from a romantic relationship to borderline platonic one. You can't help wonder how much is body changes and how much is you."
W0otang
Let's Hug
"I had rectal cancer and because of the surgery I can no longer get an erection, it's very lonely."
rickroll62
"Not sure if one exists, but a site to just make friends to be cuddle buddies, or whatever, should exist for people like you & me. I lost my sex drive & would like a relationship for that occasionally."
"In my case, it's not wanting to see someone very often, as well as the lack of sex drive, that I think would make it difficult. I also don't like people over to my home as it's too small for a couch & we'd be hanging out on my bed, which is weird to me."
lefthandbunny
Problems
"I'm in one now. My husband had a stroke... no sex is not the big problem for either one of us."
Altaira99
"This comment brings a lot of perspective. My gut reaction to this question was no. Sex was and still is pretty significant in my relationship with my wife. We’re in our 30’s and have been together over a decade. But if something happened to her and it was no longer an option? I would never leave her and love her too damned much to imagine it, no matter how much we love sex."
Spectre627
Pain
Scarlett Johansson GIF by NETFLIXGiphy"I have a near sexless marriage. The love is strong, but the desire is one-sided. That hurts."
ztirffritz
Sexless over loveless is definitely easier. So there is that.
Over time...
up s GIFGiphy"I am happily married to my good lady for decades and decades. There are times when it has been sexless for whatever reason but never has it been loveless.I wouldn’t have lasted 2 days in a loveless relationship."
Regthedog2021
You play the cards you are dealt
"I’m dating a man who got diagnosed with prostate cancer a year or so into our relationship. Prostate had to come out and it’s a hit or miss whether or not sexual function comes back. In his case, it was a miss. He wanted me to move on because he got very depressed over it."
"He’s so pleasant and a real decent human being so I stayed with him. Who would abandon someone due to a health crisis? Unfortunately he got bladder cancer next so this is another hurdle to go over. You play the cards you are dealt. We are together in this."
KitchenWitch021
Key Factors
"The reasons for the 'sexlessness' and the depth of the relationship are key factors. My wife got breast cancer at 40 and while she lived another 8 years, the chemotherapy nullified her libido and made intercourse impossible. And yet I dearly wish we could have grown old together whether or not this would have changed. But that’s completely different from cohabiting a loveless marriage or even facing such a situation in one’s youth only a few years after marriage. That would be hard."
eric_nathanson
Options
"A sexless relationship is better than a loveless relationship, as long as I'm loved and we share physical affection like cuddling and kisses and I'm allowed to beat my meat when I need too I wouldn't care. Just a heads up to all the people who take this personally enough to comment how wrong I am."
"There's no such thing as a wrong option, my opinion is in regards to myself and myself alone I'm not answering for anyone else. Different opinions aren't wrong... OP asked a question to be answered from your own point of view..so there's no reason to call anyone else wrong... it's about you, answer for YOU I've answered for me."
TheSims4Dude
Love is there...
Checking In I Love You GIF by Seize the AwkwardGiphy"I'm in one. Not happy about it, but love is still there so that's nice."
Strythe_Horde
"Same. Maybe had it once in the last 12 years. Finally decided to go to couples/sex therapy this year. Not sure it is helping, but at least I finally brought up that I wanted to try something. My wife is my best friend and I love here with every fiber, just wish there was more intimacy there."
iathpa
it never happens...
"We haven't had sex in five months due to numerous reasons. Never have alone time with my mom and daughter here. We're both too tired. Our bed we have sex on is where my mom is sleeping. Our waterbed is difficult to use. We always say next weekend and it never happens. We're still going strong though. We love each other and that's what matters."
prettysouthernchick
Well I guess some people can make it work. More power to you.
Is it so hard to pick up after yourself?
"Habitual litterers."- SuvenPan
"When people don’t clean up after themselves."- cheeto_has_spoken
If you can't take the heat, stay out of the kitchen
"People that can dish it but can’t take it."
"I work with a dude like this and it’s terrible."- MF_Ghidra
Tea Time Reaction GIF by Kamie CrawfordGiphyNever judge something by it's size.
"When skin tears near your fingernail and that teeny tiny wound hurts way more than it should."- BlackCaaaaat
"Buzz Buzz"
"When mosquitoes fly by ur ears."- AxcesDrifter
Back to where we started...
"The Reddit app when it scrolls back up to the top of the 65 TRILLION FKN articles you’ve read."
"It should burn the articles as you read them."- Deathdar1577
sorry kristen wiig GIFGet out of the way!
"People who leave the f*cking shopping carts in middle of the f*cking aisle!"- otherm0ther
But enough about me, what do you think of me?
"People who make it all about themselves."- ExtensionAir7
Proud Drag Queen GIF by CameoGiphyA lost cause
"Willfully ignorant people."- KingZaneTheStrange
Be it the way another person behaves or common, every day occurrences, we all have things which get on our nerves.
Most of the time it's best to grin and bear it.
But next time you see someone litter, it might be a fine opportunity to let that anger out.
For your sake, and everyone else's.