These men are deeply confused about women. But strangely, they only feel lost in the most trivial, minute areas.
A note to all those that were worried these comments would invite utterly toxic sexism: everything is okay here. These Redditors seem far more interested in asking about leg-shaving and parked cars.
u/grilled_tits asked, "Men of Reddit, what about women leaves you completely baffled?"
The Real Life Savers
One bag of peanut butter m&m's (not the yellow bag... the red bag) will change my wife from wanting to stab me to being a loving and pleasant woman to be around...in the span of about 2 minutes.
GiphyManners are Everything
When we are hanging out having casual conversation then her phone rings, she answers, and the pitch of her voice rises to Mariah Carey status.
It's All About Technique
How some women can shave their legs super fast! If I shaved any part of my body that quickly I would look like Hellraiser.
GiphyJust Making Sure You Saw It
The loud gasp while i'm driving about something small lol. Like do you want me to roll the car lol
This Is, Indeed, Insane
They can carry other humans inside of them if you think about it it's WILD.
EXTREMELY Helpful
Their aesthetic sense. How did they all become armchair interior decorators/fashion consultants?
My nine year old daughter is better at picking out my outfits than I am.
Giphy"Hey, You Got a Bobby Pin?"
How is it that bobby pin companies don't rule the world? I swear the average woman must go through more bobby pins in a lifetime than oxygen.
Should Have Texted Better
I've had several women give me their number without me asking, but then when I text or call, they never reply. Why do this? I like when a woman makes the first move, but it still usually turns out to be nothing.
GiphyMind What Matters
How some women can remember the exact details of an argument we had 8 months ago but somehow can't remember were they parked their car at the mall less than an hour ago.
A deleted Redditor wanted to hear about the ways straight men couldn't take a hint, so they asked:
"Lesbians of Reddit, what’s the most ridiculous thing a straight guy told you to talk you into having sex with them?"
How Patriotic
"I had a guy try to entice me with his weed. He literally pulled out the American flag bong with the grinder that looked like ammunition. Honestly left me kinda speechless."
xSwishyy
A Transplant
"Didn't go as far as sex but was definitely the most ridiculous thing a straight guy has said to me so far. I was trying to check out at the store when the 60-something y/o cashier started flirting with me, asking if I had a boyfriend, etc. When he asked why I didn't I told him I'm a lesbian and he said 'I actually have a female kidney from my transplant a couple years ago so we wouldn't have a problem together.'"
BestiesWithBaphomet
Me Too!
"The opposite - a very drunk man approached me on a station platform and asked me out. I awkwardly replied, 'Sorry, I’m gay.' He said, 'You like women??' and I nodded, bracing for homophobia… but instead he just excitedly exclaimed 'ME TOO!!!' and shook my hand. Then he left me alone. It was an extremely funny and non-threatening interaction and I think fondly of him from time to time."
orangepigeon
Let's Dance
"My brother was absolutely refusing to take no for an answer when asking [my friend] to prom. I think my brother asked my friend to prom like 5 times before they just started ignoring him. I also told off my brother cause my friend is open about being a lesbian and told him that they were a lesbian. Something about not having a lesbian somehow makes guys angry because they can't take no for an answer."
pumpkinthighs
Can men really be this off?
Oh the Drama
Feeling It Drama Club GIF by NickelodeonGiphy"He said that I had no idea what it's like to be the single straight guy who tries to find (sex) love. And it's cruel for me to not give him even a chance to be romantic with me. And I don't have a good reason to say no because he is good-looking and earns more money than I do lol."
Original-Pineapple18
DIBS
"This guy was one of my closer friends at the time, and SOLIDLY friend-zoned. We’d established countless times over the last year that we weren’t into each other, I was lesbian, and that even if I weren’t he wouldn’t go for me, yada yada. We’d talked about things that I would NOT have discussed if I knew he would ever be into me."
"Well lo and behold, one day I realize I’m questioning whether I’m bisexual or not due to a mutual friend. I bring it up to him in a state of real vulnerability, cuz I thought I’d had everything figured out before this, but wanted my friend’s input on if it was a good idea to bring it up to hot-dude directly."
"This grown-a** man told me HE HAD DIBS. D I B S."
Kazooasaurus
Preferences
"Not a lesbian, but I’m bi with a pretty strong preference for women. Probably THE most common response from guys when I say I’m not interested in 'Really? I dunno, you don’t look like you date girls.' I never know how to respond. Do they expect me to suddenly realize I’m NOT into women? Do they think questioning my preferences is endearing or sexy??"
Individual_Ad_7523
So Sexy
Ryan Reynolds GIF by CBCGiphy"Always the standard idea of they think their penis is magical and can 'turn' me. Uh, no. Also, have had more than a few guys say 'You're too attractive' to be a lesbian. They actually think it's a compliment. Oof."
Goody2Shuuz
Listen to someone's boundaries when they tell you, gentleman!
It's really that simple.
Does anyone have any similar stories? Let us know in the comments below.
