Ok!
Cartoon Yes GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy"Breastfeeding, sure no problem. Changing diapers on the table/booth/chair, no freaking way. There's a reason most bathrooms have a change table."
- LuntiX
Be Clean
"As long as you don't leave your dirty flip-flops on the table that's disgusting."
"Last week I was at a cafe terrace and I saw a woman breastfeeding her baby and afterwards changing the diaper on the table (which was a tad odd since they have a nice changing room there). After she left I noticed she left the dirty diaper on her plate, didn't even bother to close it up."
- domin8r
Silence
"A baby can't scream with a mouthful, so I'd say it's a win-win."
"My son used to do the same. The thing is his twin would get right to feeding and would stimulate the let down on his boob too, so it would be 20 seconds of screaming and 30 seconds of vague drowning noises before he clicked that food was happening."
Who Cares?
"The baby's gotta eat. Plus I don't even pay enough attention to other people to even notice or give a crap either way."
- Jikal
"I agree lol!! I've noticed moms breastfeeding their babies at a restaurant maybe a grand total of TWO times in my whole life, and I go out to eat all the time. However, I ALWAYS notice when a baby is screeching so loud nobody can enjoy their meal."
"I don't even mean just crying, I mean that SCREECH they do sometimes where if you're anywhere close to them you can't even continue talking, you just have to stop and WAIT for the kid to finish. (I promise I don't hate kids LOL this is just my opinion)."
No Adults
Oh No You Didnt GIF by happydogGiphy"Acceptable if she's breastfeeding her baby, weird if she's doing so with her husband."
- maajyc
So far, so normal. Stay in your own conversation. If you're that interested about another person, you're sounding like a stalker.
Whateves
Let It Go Whatever GIF by Hannah Bronfman Giphy"The more it happens the less people will care."
Couple Issues
"I was once breastfeeding my daughter on the beach, aside from my boob being *kind of* out (mostly blocked by the baby) I was wearing shorts and a shirt, more covered than most of the people on the beach. Apparently a dude started watching me that I didn't notice and his girlfriend took offense to it."
"She started to approach me, but my mom was with us and gave her the stink eye to end all stink eyes. I have to think if they had been just a little more exposed to breast feeding this wouldn't have been anything. I'm also 99% sure that incident resulted in the couple fighting."
When in Public
"I walked with my head down the majority of my life because I felt like everyone was staring at me as I'm a very tall female. Started looking up a few years ago and realized how very wrong I was. I cared WAY more about this made up scenario in my head while assuming the worst and causing MYSELF to feel shame over it- than anyone else ever cared about my height. We're all busy doing our own thing and I don't think MOST people care about women breastfeeding in public as people think they do."
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In the UK...
"I went to a mall in London, England once with a room dedicated for baby care. There were comfortable chairs and a microwave and sink. There were also little rooms with rocking chairs and low light floor lamps. Now, I would feed my baby wherever the hell I needed to, but this was luxury."
Free!
Mothers Day Mama GIF by reactionseditorGiphy"I'd rather a happy baby having a meal than a hungry miserable baby screaming and crying for nourishment. I am however against the restaurant charging an opening fee."
Didn't Notice
"You know, I don't think I've ever noticed anyone breast feeding. I'm sure I've seen it happen while I was out but I've never noticed. I think that says something about the people who do make a big deal out of it."
"So often it just looks like they're holding the baby. You usually can't see anything. There were a couple times random people struck up conversations with me while I was nursing in public, and I could tell they had absolutely no idea."
Cover Up
"As a woman, I think women should be able to feed their baby wherever. As a matter of personal preference though, I always cover up. I have had soo many creeps stare at me that I don't like to openly do it."
"I have breastfed in public before, and would continue to do so if I had children who were nursing. I always used the two-shirt method to keep myself as covered as possible, which was for my comfort as my breast was much larger than my baby's head."
In America...
"Just to add to this... In America, public breastfeeding is protected by federal law and state law - in all the states."
"In so many comment sections, I always come across the argument that the federal law only protects breastfeeding in public so women can't breastfeed in restaurants or stores because they're private property—the law must only apply to municipal parks and government buildings. I tell them to look at the text of the law because it doesn't say "public", it says "anywhere the mother is otherwise permitted to be", like a publicly-accessible-yet-privately-owned store. Idiots."
Who cares?
mind it talk show GIF by iOne DigitalGiphy"I try not to think about other people's business. Especially stuff that doesn't affect me in any way."
Gotta Eat
"I think everyone, including babies, should be able to eat in restaurants."
"Restaurants should also set policies though. I'm cool with those that allow everyone, but it's fair as well to have adults-only restaurants. Kids can be quite disturbing. As long as policies are disclosed, s'aulgood, man!"
- Bytewave
Drink Up
"It's pretty much the same as any customer. Don't disturb the other guests and you are fine. So drink up little human. At least you are silent."
"This is the most reasonable. As long as you aren't making a scene while doing it, it's not a problem. If you take your boob out and then wait for someone to look and then decide to throw a fit, then you should be thrown out just like any other unruly customer."
Summer in the South, fun!
"My thoughts are that I hope she doesn't give a crap what anybody else thinks when she breastfeeds her child in a restaurant."
- MRS300
"I am extremely self conscious about it because I've had people make nasty comments to me while feeding my baby in a restaurant (and elsewhere). If my baby gets hungry, I don't give a f**k about anyone else. I will always feed my hungry baby no matter what, no matter where."
"I even wear specific nursing tops so no boob is visibly exposed. For this reason, and the fact that the baby gets hot and uncomfortable (Summer in the South, fun!), I also refuse to cover with a blanket. However, I always feel judged and frowned upon for doing so. It's just hard not to."
be clean...
Sick Black And White GIF by Fleischer StudiosGiphy"Breastfeeding = fine. Not washing your hands in the bathrooms? Not cool."
On Display
"If we look at high fashion we see women with stickers covering their breasts. In high street fashion it is acceptable to expose any part of the breast as cleavage, sideboob, underboob. Basically the only part of the woman's breast we've censored is the nipple, which I find especially odd given that's the bit men have as well. Regardless, in this case the baby's mouth covers the nipple so the breast on display isn't anything out of the norm really, and even if the nipple were out, get over it."
It is what it is. Be free ladies. Whatever keeps the kid quiet, works for most of us. Do as you need.
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I've always found women to be better actors right off the bat. I believe it's because women are less afraid to tap into emotion. And that can be because society said it was ok for them to do it from birth.
Hips Don't Lie
Shakira Hips GIF by Latin GRAMMYsGiphy"Carry anything on your hip."
"Anytime I carry something heavy and place it on my hip, it's like a part of my instinct awakens."
Survival
"Survive the NICU -- apparently girls do much better in the NICU than boys do and tend to have less health complications. We heard that time and time again as parents to a 29 weeker girl. Quick source (but there are others): https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2015/04/150428151510.htm"
"I remember reading a while back that it is because girls have the equivalent of an extra week of development because they don't need to develop boy bits. I'm 25 week white/hispanic boy who survived the NICU in 1990. They were very very shocked."
- bros402
The Kids
"When I was babysitting once and me, the girl (7) and the boy (5) were playing in the street and a women came up and tried to take the kids away from me, asking all sorts of questions about who I was and if they were okay, she even asked if I was hurting them. She then tried to physically take them away from me. I imagine that wouldn't happen if there was a women looking after them."
Hold Me
"Physical contact? If I feel like it if I need a hug, I can just cuddle with my girlfriends. I don't think its' that easy for guys."
- LisslO_o
"Just specifically with girls though. I seem to make easier friends with guys and want to hug them but feel like it will get weird (as it has in the past). It makes me sad. Like, I love you, man and I want to hug you when I feel like it (not just when you're super sad and it's obviously a non-sexual hug)."
public cleaning
joel mchale baby GIFGiphy"Changing babies in public. Many men's rooms do not have baby changing stations."
- DJD119
I need better hips. And women can keep babies and all the mess that comes with them. Physical contact, why are men so adverse to it? So much therapy here to chat about.
No Questions
Helping Schitts Creek GIF by CBCGiphy"Help a child without suspicion or judgement."
- eliz1865
"Being around a child in general. I've been questioned when I was out with my son before."
In the Air
"Apparently women fighter pilots handle g-forces better than men, mainly due to being shorter and their heart not having to work so hard to pump blood to their brains (short men also handle g-forces easier for the same reason)."
"Yep. As a tall guy (6'4"), g forces mess with me big time. In fact, 2 weeks ago i passed out on an especially intense roller coaster. My wife, who was sitting next to me for the ride cackled with laughter when we saw the on ride picture and i was out like a light."
Will you tell her?"
"Compliment any complete stranger. As a dude, I have to very careful complimenting strangers. I will actually tell my wife, "check her hair out, it's super cool. Will you tell her?" And she will, and it made that stranger's day. Just wish I could do that more often without being seen as creepy. This especially applies to children. It's a big no-no for a 41 year old guy to compliment a child saying they look super pretty. Woman - no issue."
Sales...
"Since the majority of posts here are sexual, I'll bite: sales. Seriously females salespeople are on average much more successful than their male counterparts. In my industry (industrial sales), it's an open understanding that our typical sales contact (older middle-aged male) is much more interested in talking to females than males. Huge sales buff if you are young AND at least a little attractive."
"If you are a hard working, quick witted and social young female looking for a high paying job without education requirements, I would strongly encourage you to look into B2B sales. All of the technical knowledge you can learn on the job."
Man's Work
wonder woman GIFGiphy"Have someone help you with mechanical/electrical/car work. So many people believe men just know how to do that stuff and will look down on guys who don't. As a woman, people assume I don't know what I'm doing with that kind of stuff. Sexist, but helps me, I guess."
- kkohler2
The ladies got it going on. That's why I always think of my mom as a hero. There are just somethings men are never going to measure up to. That's ok, talent is meant to be dispersed.
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But the idea that women are somehow inherently delicate, lovely, kind, and gentle isn't the only misconception out there.
Reddit user BOBO24PLAYZ asked:
"Women of Reddit, what is a 100% myth about women?"
So first we are going to get the obvious stuff out of the way. Not all women menstruate or have vaginas, but genitals is almost always going to be the first thing asked about when a Reddit user poses a question like this.
When it comes to vulvas, vaginas, urethras, and menstruation it's seriously BAFFLING how much misinformation is floating around out there.
So let's just go on ahead and knock some stuff out right now.
A Cave System
cave GIFGiphy"That we pee and bleed from the same hole." - Scared_Gap5717
"I remember I said there were two different holes in 7th grade and I got roasted. 'It's not a cave system!' and was branded an idiot for the rest of middle school. I am in medical school now oddly enough." - toomuchredditmaj
"There are men who think we urinate and menstruate from the same hole. That is why they think we can control our periods the way we control peeing, I assume." - moffsoi
"My fav part of that myth is the implication that women are simply being stupid or intentionally difficult by choosing not to hold their periods in until the most opportune time."
"As if we have the ability but are going 'ehh, I could wait until I get home but f*ck it, imma change a tampon in a public restroom just for the thrill of it. Really feel like ruining a pair of pants today while I'm at it.' " - Much_Difference
"I don't like how the idea we can hold it implies that we're literal infants who just pee ourselves all the time for fun." - BuckyBear1917
Vagina Rings
defeat GIFGiphy"That you can tell how much sex a woman has had by looking at her genitals. No you can't." - [Reddit]
"Correct. You have to cut the vagina in half and count the rings." - ThisIsMyCouchAccount
"That's to check for age. For use you have to check the tiny odometer." - DudesworthMannington
A Freshness Seal
Giphy"That one bleeds the first time they have sex. If they didn't 'bleed' they were not really a virgin."
"FALSE! Raise your hand if you did NOT BLEED!? I raising mine! 🙋♀️" - cathef
"Thisssss. I didn't ever bleed or tear my hymen until I gave birth lol. It's just a stretchy piece of skin at the bottom of the vagina, not a freshness seal" - cbrpxe
What's The Difference?
Season 5 Whats The Difference GIF by Living SingleGiphy"That we get 'loose' when we have multiple partners."
"I think it's ridiculous that majority of the guys I've met that say this don't also think that those same women get 'loose' when they've been with one man for several years." - OK-Witness8418
"I've met girls who thought this to be true and were afraid to have sex because of it!"
"Granted, they were quite young, but that's how strong the myth is. The 'mind blown' moment when these people are asked what exactly is the difference between 50 times with one man and one time with 50 men has always been pretty amusing though." - narwhals-narwhals
Born With(out) It
Happy Adam Scott GIF by SkyGiphy"That every woman is born with a hymen. Or that if she doesn't have a hymen then she isn't a virgin."
"Hymens can break really easily, such as sitting on a bike or horse wrong, exercise, (sometimes but highly unlikely) using a tampon if inserted incorrectly. And many women are just born without a hymen." - TheShining02
It's Natural
"That pregnancy is no big deal because it's 'natural'."
"It's metal that the human body can go through that kind of stress, but it is still totally physically traumatic. It's why women have a higher rate of osteoporosis-- fetuses literally leach the calcium from their mother's bones."
"Women often herniate their uteruses after pregnancy and just have to 'deal' with not being able to pee properly or have sex pain-free because it's seen as totally normal." - facingnortheast
OK that's enough about genitalia for now. Women are way more than just that.
Spoiler alert, women are human!
Solving A Problem
"We're not a Problem to Be Solved."
"If you want to date a woman and she is resistant, you will not solve that. No matter how many rom-com movies you watch where a man spends 90 minutes of your time annoying the woman he is interested in and gets her."
"This does not happen in real life. Move on. Find someone who is more likely to reciprocate your affections."
"Source: was stalked by someone, which stopped when I told him that if he showed up, I'd push him down the front steps so grow up already." - VapoursAndSpleen
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What I Really, Really Want
wannabe GIF by Spice GirlsGiphy"That we are a mystery. I am sick of telling people exactly what I want and hearing, 'well, yeah but what do you really want?' "
"I am not lying or playing games. You know what women want? To be treated like human being with respect like anyone else!" - ViperBunny
"Wow, so deep. I wish I could know what you really want, though." - Imomaway
Emotions
GIF by reactionseditorGiphy"Women are "more emotional"....ever see a man watch sports or get told he's wrong about something?" - Rizarice
"Men are emotional too but the sh*tty part is that the only emotion they have been taught to process or have been encouraged to process are anger and lust." - bubbly-region
"Men are so much worse at handling their emotions. I assume this is because they are taught they don't have any, and thus don't recognize their many (many!) emotional outbursts." - thediplocrap
Lesbians
monsters inc GIFGiphy"That Lesbians 'just haven't had the right penis yet.' "
"Sirs, I regret to inform you: there is no magic penis out there that will change our sexuality. I know you love the little fellas and think they're magical, but for us Lesbians? I swear to you, they are not, nor will they ever be magic."
"In the wise words of Mike Wizowski: 'Put that thing back where it came from or so help me.' " - RelentlesslyCrooked
Not Me
Oh No Lol GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy"That we are more emotionally intelligent and intuitive than men."
"I am definitely not empathetic and don't like dealing with emotional people, I'm mostly just socially awkward and not particularly mothering or kind."
"Seems like the assumption is that women want to baby men. Not me lol" - counterboud
A Recipe For Broken Adults
Lunch Box Cooking GIF by KiddyPlanetGiphy"girls are more mature"
"No, girls are just punished much more severely than boys are for behavior that all children exhibit. Boys only seem less mature because we do not demand maturity from them at a young age like we do from girls."
"Girls are forced to suppress being human and boys are forced to suppress emotions other than anger. It's a recipe for broken adults." - BanditaIncognita
Indirect
Game Of Thrones Ugh GIFGiphy"That all women are 'indirect communicators.' "
"I'm not saying they can't be, I'm not even saying the majority don't fall under this category, but personally, indirect communication goes right over my head. It's frustrating because I don't assume people can read my mind, why should I be able to read theirs?"
"I feel like when people assume I communicate indirectly just because I'm a girl, it leads to them not listening to what I'm saying, instead they try to dissect and analyze what I'm 'really' trying to say."
"Also men are just as capable of being passive aggressive."
"I live with a man and he constantly thinks I'm trying to send subtle messages and I've had to sit him down and explain that if I'm upset about something I will tell him. He on the other hand will slam doors, stomp around the house, give me the silent treatment, say nothing is wrong only to snap at me over something small (I'm making him sound awful but he's actually a pretty great person lol.)" - Reddit
Stereotypes
Art Fun GIF by KAKTUZBOYGiphy"That we are sh*t at directions. I never get lost and my husband couldn't find his way out of a shed."
"Also that we are sh*t at math. I live in Asia and the idea that women aren't good at math doesn't really exist here, so surprise surprise the girls perform on a equal level to the boys in high school in most Asian nations."
"Stereotypes are self-reinforcing, and dangerous. Even the people who are harmed by them can come to believe them and lose confidence in themselves." - practical_ghost
Perfection
perfect natalie portman GIFGiphy"Women are perfect all the time."
"I don't like it when people hold women to a higher standard than men. We're all just people trying to do our best and I'm sick of people expecting perfection from me just because I'm a woman."
"Everyone expects me to be smiling all the time; and when I'm direct at work, I'm called a b*tch."
"Women politicians are criticized for the smallest mistakes, women in all professions are. People expect so much and sometimes I have nothing to give. I'm burnt out." - Adorable_Island_1798
Dude ... and Lady
fedora GIFGiphy"That we all think and feel the same!"
"I had a manager who refused to call me dude, because his girlfriend didn't like to be called dude. I'm not your girlfriend, bro!"
"He would not listen to me when I said it was okay. I even told him I prefer it."
"Instead, he legit called me 'lady.' It would be like 'Hey dudes. Oh! And lady.' "
"Made me feel like I was different, and not a part of the team. Just call me dude!" - QueenOfAYogaBall
Normally, I would end this on a witty note - but I don't have much more to add on top of "women are human!"
So yeah, whatever "all women..." thing you have in your head, go on ahead and forget it. All women nothing. Treat us as individuals please and thanks!
Let's talk about toxic femininity, shall we? VysX_ asked:
There's toxic masculinity but what are examples of toxic femininity?
For some reason, toxic femininity gets really, REALLY prevalent when they become moms. It’s weird and kinda creepy, if you ask me.
Why does Little League bring out the worst in people?
“Mothers who treat other people like crap and then justify it by saying they're a mama bear."
“A few years ago my son's team was playing a little league game against another team. We had a very good team that year and the other team was really struggling. Despite this, it was a close game going into the 5th (i.e. next-to-last) inning.
Well, we're batting and the wheels finally come off for the opposition. A kid on our team gets a simple hit to the outfield and the other team proceeds to go full tee-ball and throw it all over creation. What should have been a single turns into a 3-run HR.
As the batter crosses home plate, fans are going nuts, players are going nuts, everyone is going nuts, and the star player on the losing team just melts down. He picks up the ball and throws it as hard as he can right at our dug out. There's a safety fence of course, so no one gets hurt, but it was still very much an "Oh, snap" moment for everyone.
At this point, the ump turns to the losing coach and says, "Coach, you need to get a hold of your player." That's it. That's all he said. He didn't say anything to the player; he didn't kick him out of the game; he just gave the coach a direct warning.
Next thing I hear is "DONT YOU TALK TO MY BABY THAT WAY" as the dug-out mom comes firing out of the other dug-out, heading straight for the ump. Fortunately for everyone, the head coach comes out of nowhere to intercept her. He proceeds to restrain her and walk her (and the player) away. The whole game stops for ~5 minutes while those three basically have a group hug in the middle of the infield.
Fortunately, that was the end of the drama. I still give major props to that other coach for somehow diffusing that situation without getting the police involved. But I will never understand what was going through that lady's mind."
We can all do “womaning” differently.
Wendy Conrad GIF by Your Happy WorkplaceGiphy“To me it would mean women who bag on other women for womaning differently than they do.
This becomes really toxic after childbirth. Some women will feel nothing about letting you know how you are parenting wrong by using this product or letting you child do this particular thing.
Women who are able to stay at home will be made to feel guilty for not helping to provide; and women who work are made to feel guilty for abandoning their child.
I wish women were more understanding about dealing with differences and letting things slide a bit more. You should never feel higher after putting someone else down.
That being said, I don't know how we did it, but I found the world's greatest group of moms when my son was a year and a half old. We came from all walks of life and supported the ever-loving hell out of each other. This was in Phoenix late 90's and we were completely tight until I moved away when my son was 5. I miss all of em."
They should know better than to tear down other women.
“It's very common for mothers or female relatives to be some of the first ones to comment on a woman's weight, appearance, or personal style/fashion choices, as well as reinforcing a sense of self-hatred (i.e. "I look so fat in this outfit, and you look so ugly in that color"), all while tearing other women down ("I can't believe she's wearing that, doesn't she know how she looks??").
When you have that reinforcement that it's normal to say things like that, because if your mom does it then it's okay to do it too, then you just treat it as normal. And because it's so common, you find other women to do it with and it just becomes a cycle. If you try to break it, then you're labeled as sensitive, a bore, and "Oh my god we're just having fun, chill out, it's not that serious."
I still remember the first time I called my mom on talking sh*t about a woman wearing something she didn't like, and she got so f*cking mad at me."
Let’s dive into the tearing down other women thing some more. We as a society need a wake-up call.
It’s like high school all over again.
"Some women are so judgemental about other women, particularly when it comes to looks or fashion.
Also the women who seem to enjoy forming cliques and cutting out anyone they deem to be an outsider.
Worked with an office full of them once. It really sucked!"
“When I first got out of grad school, my first (and as it turns out, only) teaching job was long-term substituting for a friend while she went on maternity leave. The kids/classroom were mine for the first half of the school year, but we coordinated so that things would be pretty smooth transitioning back to my friend teaching at the end of her leave.
My friend was part of a two-teacher team who ran the 8th grade Student Council. I told the other teacher that I would be happy to help her with the club in my friend's absence, but she insisted she didn't need my help. She then proceeded to 100% ignore me and treat me as if I was invisible during all future interactions. 8th-grade team meetings, if I said even a single word, she shot me side eye, even though what I had said was not at all related to her; just a kind of "you're not a real teacher, how dare you speak?" vibe she was giving off.
My last day, my friend came in after school to put her classroom stuff up as I took my own down. The other teacher and two other women (the PE coach who I'd never talked to and another teacher, I don't remember) came in to help her, but none of the three of them offered to help me take any of my own things down or pack any of it up. They also said things like, "Is this yours or hers?" to my friend, even though I was standing right f*cking there. They also gushed about how excited they were that she was back; again, right in front of me.
After I was finally done putting away all my things--again, by myself--I just left without a word. I texted my friend about it later, and she apologized for her other friends' behavior but just excused it as, "Yeah, they're definitely the 'Mean Girls' types".
I was just floored. These were TEACHERS. You know, the people who are supposed to teach children NOT to bully other people? And I had never been anything but nice to everyone I met during my time there, but they didn't care. I wasn't part of their group, so I wasn't worth their time.
It became one of a laundry list of reasons I decided I didn't actually want to be a teacher for a living, after all.
tl;dr - personally experienced cliquey adult women in the education field, of all places. It sucked.”
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How possessive.
“My ex-husband and I separated when our child was 2. Went to a birthday party for daughter's friend and was having a casual conversation with one of the husbands. The group of women stood in a corner staring at me, and the wife came up and grabbed him by the arm and started doing that strange possessive peacock dance.
What were we talking about? Real estate prices."
“No joke, I had a professor I was close with because we were both single moms and she gave me the advice to wear a wedding band even without a man and that the other moms would chill out a bit. It worked and my daughter started getting more opportunities for playdates. It's really demoralizing."
I think we all need to learn how to be more forgiving.
Toxic office culture is the literal worst.
come together love and hip hop GIF by VH1Giphy“The sheer terrifying glee they have at tearing down someone who's made a mistake or is somehow lacking in their eyes. I worked at a doctor's office with a fifty person staff, forty five of which were women. Like they were so fake and catty and just outright hateful to each other. It was a toxic office culture."
“Did they also have a compulsive, competitive need to please the male figures in the department? I go weekly to a fairly small medical department where the head doctor is male and the majority of nurses and admin are female. They treat him like an absolute God and defer to him with everything. He's a huge d*ck and of course, has a big ego by now."
This girl isn't just toxic--she's a monster.
“A girl in the grade below me (I'm a senior in high school at this point) passed away unexpectedly due to sepsis. Our whole city was in shock as the girl was in the school just days before her passing.
I remember I met up with my gf at the time and she asked, "Why do so many people care about her dying? It's not like she was pretty anyways."
This was the type of girl that says, "What??!! I am SOOO nice."
Safe to say, the lord blessed me with a brain and I GTFO of that relationship.
To this day, she is still in contact with me & recently she complained that guys use her & she can't figure out why nobody will be with her.
Well, honey, I don't think it takes a rocket scientist to figure that one out.
Edit: Some of you have said that I should tell her and I did. Apparently, she would "literally never say that about her" and also apparently "I know nothing about her." (My ex. Dated for 4 years. Know nothing)"
This is how eating disorders start.
“Probably the culture around eating.
When I was 17-18, a few friends kept saying how much more attractive I'd be if I lost weight, how that's why most guys weren't into me, how I'd regret not being skinny in college, etc. My BMI was slightly under 25, so I wasn't overweight, but I was close to it, especially compared to them.
So I basically became anorexic from 18-20 just because the feedback was like a high. I recovered, but not enough to make my mom and others happy, even though my BMI was 22-23. This continued for years between friends and family, and it was exhausting cycling between being too skinny or not average enough.
That's really the only strong example I can think of. No matter the trendy body shape, the criticism from others will always continue. I've only had one guy ever comment on my weight compared to the many, many women, even strangers.”
As a woman myself, I’ve encountered plenty of toxic femininity in my life. It’s almost as terrible as the objectifying sh*t I hear men saying about women all the time. We have to be rid of cattiness and tearing other women down.
Remember what we actually need to be working against. So much sexism exists in the world, and we have to stick together.