Love makes us all blind. Oh heck, lust makes us straight up blind and stupid. We all need to start paying attention to the people who are just using and abusing. Don't get used up for another person's agenda.
The signs are always there. In NEON and FIRE. All you gents have to do is open your eyes.
Redditor u/Darkbrotherhood1 wanted to know what red flags the men out there need to see sooner than later by asking:
Guys, What's a good sign that a woman is just using you?
There have been a few vixens I've saved some men folk from. But it wasn't easy. And sadly, straight, cis men never seem to learn. Be aware boys, black widow is not just a movie title.
How are You?
kim kardashian GIF by KUWTK
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"Does she ever ask you how you're doing (more than superficially), or seem interested in what's going on with your life?"
Needs
"Pretty much the same as when any person is just using you -- the relationship feels unbalanced and unequal, with you giving more than you are receiving. In a good relationship, friendship, whatever, both people are giving what they want to give without coercion and both feel adequately rewarded for it."
"Sometimes one person needs more, sometimes the other, but it evens out over time. When you feel like you're being coerced into giving more than you really want, whether that's with force or emotional manipulation or whatever, you're being used and you'll eventually resent it."
- munkymu
Off-Character
"Anytime you try opening up, you're acting off-character, selfish, an @ss, etc. it's usually the typical pathetic manipulation people pull to make you feel bad for either standing up for yourself or just trying to be you."
"I guess this behavior depends on how far into the relationship you are with those types of people. For instance, in several of my own interactions with people that eventually ended up using me, they were very keen on making me feel comfortable opening up and being vulnerable to establish that kind of connection and desire for more of it. Then, much later on when I was sufficiently hooked did they start with the negative reactions and manipulation."
Amen
"Your issues aren't worth talking about, but she will unload all of hers on you."
"Amen. Got out of a long relationship that turned into this just 6 months ago. Would sit and moan, whinge and kick off about the most infinitesimal things for hours but when even serious issues came up in my life like my brother attempting suicide, her response was "well he's an a**ehole anyway."
The Cycle
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"She doesn't act that interested when you are interested, flirting, contacting her, but when you stop, suddenly she is very interested and contacts you, a lot until you act interested again, the cycle then repeats."
People Describe The Worst Adult Tantrum They've Ever Witnessed | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
See there? It's all very subtle. And this not to say men aren't just as bad. But we're focusing here for a certain purpose. Let's siphon out the ladies who have ill intent.
Single Side
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"One-sidedness. When she expects you to do things that she wouldn't do herself."
Blood Suckers
"Energy vampires. You should look that up, but basically selfish people that only care about themselves will unload all their emotions and problems onto you to feel better, but will never ever reciprocate because they feel their issues are important and don't view yours as important. It's about them and never about you, unless it affects them."
- Mugen593
"I was super into a girl that I worked with and we would hang out all the time after work. However, I was never getting anywhere with her. I know I had made my intentions clear and she never told me it would never happen...but just kept the possibility of it happening open. I eventually saw the writing on the wall and moved on and met my wife. I tell you, the second I stopped pursuing her and started acting like just a friend."
"She flipped on a dime and started laying it on strong. I would like to think that I was smart enough to not fall it. The reality is I was so smitten with my wife that I don't think anything could have made me notice another girl. If I had moved on to anybody else besides my wife I probably would have fallen for it all over again."
- Ashotep
I Hate Tangerines
"I was "dating" a girl who said she was too busy to go on a date on Saturday, and that she was only free on Tuesdays. She also said that she wanted to date other guys while dating me. She later admitted that she was cycling boyfriends through the week for free food. I dropped her like a bag of moldy tangerines."
Dinner?
Episode 1 Food GIF by RuPaul's Drag Race
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"She never calls you by your name and you find out you're labeled "free food" in her phone."
"happy pill"
"A girl once called me her "happy pill" a nickname her therapist created cause I genuinely made her life so much better but she cheated on me anyway, My friend told me that you only take a pill when you need it and i've lived by that and use that as a filter for all my relationships."
Lungs Away
"She's in desperate need of a lung transplant and is always complementing you about what nice lungs you have and making offhanded comments about how you don't use your lungs much and could probably do okay without them."
Qualities
"She's always making posts telling her friends where you took her for dinner, birthday, holidays, vacation and what gifts you've given her, but never once does she say anything about any unique qualities she finds attractive in you."
"But how do you know she doesn't mention this to her girlfriends via text or conversation? Do you really need the internet to see something that's between the 2 of you? I personally cringe at those love declarations via social media, that's private stuff."
Tinting
Rose Colored Glasses GIF by StickerGiant
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"There are no signs big enough what will be visible through rose tinted glasses."
Let me tell you...
Oh, I can answer this one.
- When asking you for something (time/money/physical effort), if you say yes, she will almost always and immediately look for something else to ask you for that is related. eg: "Can you stop and pick up those hair things for me? [I say yes] Ok, can you also stop by the shop next door and get me that thing I like?" This kind of things isn't a big deal on occasion, but when it's a repeating pattern, it's a red flag.
- She will point out how much she messes with you and how "it's for you."
- Will treat any/most of your interests with disdain or indifference.
- Doesn't ever really care what you have to say.
- When you attempt to point out any inequality in the relationship, she will get extremely defensive and attack you for being selfish, and tell you you need to be more supportive/giving/"a real man." - mostlyBadChoices
Don't Speak
"If she has other men in her life (in whatever capacity), but you're not allowed to even speak to another woman - even an established platonic friend - without her flipping her crap. You are nothing to her but a source of drama and validation. Run (do not walk) away."
- belbsy
Liz!!!
"When she flirts with you all the time, and also everyone else, and asks you to come over to do complex electrical work and says she'll take you out to dinner, and you agree because you like the work and like being around her, but she brings her kids along and ignores you the entire time."
"Then when you're not around her she never texts or calls and just waves at you when you pass her at work every day, making no effort to talk to you whatsoever. And when you try to talk to her she gives you short answers like "Yeeeaaaaah"
"Forget you Liz!"
Flashed
"Idk if it counts but when she takes A LOT of time to text back most of the time but as soon as you invite her to a really good place (where she won't have to pay for anything) she is suddenly faster than Flash to respond and now answers quick as long as the topics are about going to said place."
All the Small Things
"Small things like body language whenever you take her out could be decent indicators... If she doesn't really seem all that into you but chooses to go out with you anyways and she's getting something out of it (food, materialistic things... Etc)".
Kim? That you?
Pay Me Kim Kardashian GIF by GQ
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"Always checking her phone, always talking and texting to someone else on her phone and spending your money."
Sometimes... they're just not that into you. And life will go on. Skip any and all drama. And know your worth. BAM. Lesson learned.
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The old wives' tales.
They are the stories of legend.
I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.
Where did they originate?
WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!
You don't hear about them as much anymore.
It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.
But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.
Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:
"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"
"Wait an hour to swim after eating."
What a crock!
So many summer hours wasted.
I want revenge for that one.
Say Nothing
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"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."
LonelyMail5115
"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."
I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Say Something
"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."
Severe_Airport1426
"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."
crappycurtains
"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."
AlbinoShavedGorilla
Body Temps
"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."
chriseo22
"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."
"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."
apocalypticradish
Arms Down
"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."
Fatmouse84
10 Years Actually
Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."
"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."
Gecko-911
I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.
This tale is haunting.
High/Low
Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace
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"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."
LeastFormal9366
"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."
IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI
The Cursed
"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."
"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."
SmoreOfBabylon
Stay In
"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."
"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."
worldbound0514
Dreams and Facts
"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."
"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."
mattshonestreddit
"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."
Darthdemented
Cracked
Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office
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"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."
Choice-Grapefruit-44
"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."
MacyTmcterry
I love my knuckles.
Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
Every now and then, a friend of ours might say something, or we might overhear a complete stranger say something that makes us stop in our tracks.
More often than not, what we can't believe we just heard is something so ridiculous, we can't help but put the person who said it in their place.
Other times, however, what we just heard might have stunned us silent because of how shockingly clever it was.
Resulting in our not wanting to scold or yell at someone, but rather give them a handshake.
Redditor SubmergingOriginal was curious to hear the sharpest and wittiest things they've ever heard, from friends and strangers alike, leading them to ask:
"Enough with the dumbest; what is the wittiest thing you've ever heard someone say?"
Don't Give Me So Much Credit...
'I was on a team at work that was on a project working insane overtime."
"One night after an 80-90 hour week, we were all sitting around the table trying to finish up so we could go home."
"Around 11, my buddy's wife called, dubious about the hours he'd been keeping."
"We heard her through the line - 'are you cheating on me?'"
"Exasperated, he looked at our boss, then replied 'honey, if I was cheating on you, I would have been home by now'."- lionbatcher
Eternal Optimism...
"Asked a blind guy if he'd been blind his whole life."
"He said 'Not yet'."- Feeling_Mode_6465
Free time Isn't The Only Thing He Has On His Hands...
"My brother got a vasectomy and when the doctor was releasing him and giving him instructions (with the nurse listening in), one of the orders was to 'come back and have a follow-up appointment after you’ve ejaculated 30 times'.”
"Without missing a beat my brother asked 'what time do you open tomorrow?'”
"The nurse couldn’t keep it together after hearing that."- UtahUtopia
Awkward Season 8 GIF by The Office
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Double Whammy!
"My pal uses the phrase 'he doesn’t look strong enough to carry information' and it cracks me up every time."
"Calling someone stupid and weak in one fell swoop."- JennyW93
Can't Hide Your DNA...
'Whenever I jokingly insult my mum, she says 'that must be where you get it from'."
"She cracked the code."
"I can never offend her without offending myself."- JennyW93
Self-Sufficient!
"My brother was a line cook at a New Orleans restaurant."
"My mom was in town, staying at a fancy hotel, and he stopped by after work, still wearing his kitchen whites."
"He was reading a newspaper in the lobby waiting for her to come down when the shocked lobby manager sputtered at him, 'MAY I HELP YOU!?!?'
"He answered, 'thanks, but I know how to read',” and went back to his paper."- jobrody
Morph Current Affairs GIF by Aardman Animations
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A Miracle!
"My brother-in-law’s comment."
"The entire family went out for my mother’s 80th birthday and after the meal we all went to a local park, largely occupied by the elderly, to rest."
"My mother needed crutches at this point, and they were resting against her bench."
"My 10-year-old niece, who looked like every starving waif image from Dickens, grabbed the crutches and started hobbling round the park."
"All the OAPs were following her progress with looks of pity until my brother ran up behind her, and kicked away the crutches."
"There was an audible gasp from round the park and then my niece picked the crutches back up and started chasing my brother, clearly intending to hit him."
"In the confused silence my brother-in-law’s voice rang out 'Praise be! She can walk again!'"
"We still think this was the highlight of the birthday celebrations."- DdraigGwyn
Still Legal, Whichever Way You Cut It...
"I picked up my pleasantly tipsy boyfriend from a nightclub."
"We were stopped by the Police for a random breath test."
"They asked me my age, and I said, 33."
"My bf blurted out '33? You told me you were 22'."
"Police just laughed and let me go."- Aggravating-Corgi379
Music Video Police GIF by Andrew W. K.
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A Bit Too On The Nose?
"Business law class in college years ago, talking about the issues that black Americans had before the Civil Rights."
"Amendment, trying to travel through the south with the discrimination so rampant, trying to find restaurants to serve them and decent lodgings."
"My instructor was posing a hypothetical: 'So you pull up out front of this place, you're exhausted from driving for hours, and you see the sign out front says 'Ku Klux Klan Motel'."
"'What would you expect to find there?'"
"Without missing a beat, from the back of the room came this gem: "'Extra sheets in every room?'"- NedsAtomicDB
Not Yet, Anyway...
"I was working with my friend and his dad."
"My friend (26) heard an ice cream truck near where we were working."
"He asked his dad if he could have a couple dollars."
"His dad asked, 'what for?'"
"My friend told his dad that there was an ice cream truck in the neighborhood, and that they were playing music."
"My friends dad told him "'They don't charge anything to listen to the music'."- tatersalad1234567890
Words Escape You In The Literal "Heat" Of The Moment...
"A friend of mine is a teacher and her husband is known for his wit."
"She told this story to him:"
"One day at school a kid took the hall pass and returned reeking like smoke."
"She asked the kid if he’d been smoking and he denied it over and over."
"She was about to send him to the office when she noticed smoke coming from somewhere."
"She told the kid and he realized that he didn’t put his cig out completely and it was burning in his pants pocket."
"The kid noticed and frantically tried to put it out and someone finally poured water on it."
"Her husband sat listening to this with a weird look on his face."
"She asked him what was wrong."
“'What’s wrong???'"
"'This was probably the only chance you’ll have in your life to say literally, ‘liar,liar, pants on fire’ and you missed your chance'."- Luder714
On Fire No GIF by PEEKASSO
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Amazing What You Might Say A Few Drinks In...
"When I went to a renaissance faire once, I went to a beer tent and ordered a Newcastle Brown Ale (seemed the most fitting for the surroundings)."
"The beer wench, without skipping a beat, said, 'Everyone wants a Newcastle - no one wants to remodel!'"- jayhof52
Read The Room People!
"My dad wiped out when skiing down a mountain and lost a ski."
"After a few minutes of hunting for it, he gives up, slings the one remaining ski over a shoulder and starts walking down the mountain in his ski boots."
"About half-way down, another skier stops and goes 'Gee! Did you lose a ski?'"
"My dad instantly replied 'No, I was out for a walk and found one!'"- PeterJoAl
There's a reason your mother always told you to "use your words".
As clever remarks can have a much more lasting effect on people than a push or shove.