People Divulge The Dumbest Thing They've Ever Heard Someone Say
Ospan Ali / Unsplash

I once had a man ask why I would choose to have my period on a Saturday knowing we were supposed to go snorkeling.

Aside from the astonishment that this man thought I could choose the day, I'll be honest and say I expected his concern to be shark-related since ... ya know ... snorkeling.

Fam it was much, much dumber than that.


This man, this adult human male old enough to drink and vote and make children, was upset with me because he believed my super-absorbency tampon would impact the water levels and we couldn't snorkel in the shallow water.

Because the tampon lodged securely inside of me would suck it up.

Reddit user Why_Not_Zoidbergaww asked:

"What is the dumbest thing you have ever heard someone say?"

​Holiday Hours For Emergencies 

Good Night Goodbye GIF by CBCGiphy

" 'Wait hospitals are open on public holidays'?' How the hell do you respond to that?"

- Bo-Cruz

"Yes"

- moo100times

“ 'No, you just die if an accident occurs on holidays.' Merry Christmas everyone is home for the holiday so you’re just going to have to wait until tomorrow stab wound and all. Have a great day"

- Bacnnator

​Foreigner Inception 

"The worst thing about travelling abroad is all the foreigners"

- StonksStink

"Well it’s a pretty true statement, I assume the person who said it didn’t realise they are actually talking about themselves though."

- neers1985

"My ex FIL was exactly like this, he constantly complained about all the foreigners and the foreign food whilst on holiday in a foreign country."

- bertiebastard

Too Cold

Season 9 Reaction GIF by The OfficeGiphy

"My mom, after getting ice cream in the drive through at Dairy Queen:"

"oh! My ice cream is too cold, can you heat it up a little bit?"

- Flounder_guppy

"Omg I used to make warm ice cream soup when I was little!!!!"

"It's delicious :)"

- littlegingerfae

"My grandmother use to blow on her ice cream to warm it up 😂"

- mommysauras

"I understand exactly what she meant tho. Softserve must be soft!"

- YogurtFirm

Eat What Now?

""What is wrong, scientifically, with eating your own poop? Hear me out. I'm serious. It's food that's already been in your body. Yeah, nobody does that. But why, scientifically or medically is it wrong?"

- sovereignsekte

"This person was already doing it and wanted affirmation on their life choices."

- rayEW

"This sounds like something Joe Rogan would say."

- Captain_Hammertoe

Wrong Ungulate

goat eating GIFGiphy

"Friend: 'I don't get it: how the f*ck do goats grow into deer in the wild but stay goats at the farm?' "

"Me: 'Ayo what the f*ck?' "

"Friend: 'I know, right? With a pony, you can at least see how it'll grow up to be a horse but the goats look so different from deer.' "

"... ?"

- Corvus_Manufaktura

"Yeah and a Pony is a pony, it's not going to grow up to be a horse so that just makes the comment even stupider (although a lot of people think a baby horse is called a pony, so that part at least makes some sense)."

- golden_fli

"it’s been 10 minutes and i can’t stop laughing. thank you for this lol"

- robertaasdf

Who's More Dumb

"crows can't be that smart if they can't use sign language"

- Analdragongrip

"Apologies, I clearly must be stupid if I don’t have fingers."

- Toxicity5675

How Bad Was He?

"One of my dumbest friends said this in middle school and I somehow remember it 'was Hitler really that bad?' and it wasn't a joke"

- Lt_Birch

"Well... dude asked 😆💁♀️"

- EquivalentControl972

Reading.

Unimpressed Sea GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy

"Bro you read, they're just words it's stupid"

"I was just embarrassed for them"

- alittleoverthinker

"just looking at symbols, what a waste if time!"

- hastingsnikcox

"Bruh, why are you so into math? It’s just meaningless symbols assigned value by society"

- Why_Not_Zoidbergaww

Pop-Out Book Astrologyidontdigdinosaurs

"My talking with family: I can't believe (family member age 60+) doesn't know the difference between the sun and the moon"

"Other family member age 30+: isn't the sun a gas giant?"

"Other family member age 40+: isn't the sun just the moon flipped around?"

"9 year old: the sun is a star the moon is just a moon"

"Me and 9 year old looking at each other like how are we related to these people"

"Everyone was dead serious with their answers an did argue with us explaining how they saw it in pop out books"

- dawnface42069

"At least they don’t think that the sun is a planet"

- Why_Not_Zoidbergaww

"To this day I still don't know what they think the sun is lol"

- dawnface42069

"Women I knew thought giraffes ate birds."

- idontdigdinosaurs

"That is so weird . . . I suppose in her mind the long neck is for snatching birds out of trees or the air? Just trying to imagine how she came to such an 'understanding'."

- --VoidHawk--

"Lol my misreading just made that so much dumber (and funnier)... I first read are instead of ate. And was for a second seriously wondering how someone thinks an animal with neither wings nor feathers or beaks and with four legs was a bird xD then I read again and was like oooooh well"

- mycrazyblackcat

"She’s wrong ofc, but not like completely wrong. Sometimes animals like giraffes, horses and deers eat birds or other animals so supplement vitamins they may lack. It’s not at all common, but common enough for there to be photos and videos of it. They’re still herbivores though"

- pestilencerat

Once you're over the headache that all must have given you, meet us in the comments for even more of *gestures vaguely at the stupid* thiiiiiis.

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