We looooove a first date. (Read: Nobody loves a first date.)
First dates are awkward. No matter how good they end up being, they start off awkward. There's always nerves surrounding them. Am I going to impress them? Are they going to impress me? How are we going to get along?
Do we kiss? What do I say? How do I be myself?
Wouldn't we all like a little more guidance?
Here were some suggestions.
Don't Be A Silent Jerk
Ask questions in general. Don't just talk about yourself. Don't expect them to carry the conversation. When in doubt, ask a question about the topic they were just talking about. Chances are it's a topic they're interested in.
This Was A Less Than Ideal Ending
This couple matched on a dating service and agreed to go out. The girl, however, didn't follow my rule (using the restroom before you leave) and wound up having to go to bathroom when they got back to his place. So she does her thing, right, but the toilet ends up being clogged and it over flows. To save herself some embarrassment she tries to wrap up her crap in a towel with the intention of throwing it out the window. But the window is too high. So she climbs up and gets herself stuck dangling out of the window with her wrapped up poo sitting there on the edge beneath the window. Her date has to call 9–1-1 to get her out of there.
Classy, Not College
Make sure that you have enough money to pay for the entire date. I think that splitting the tab for food/drinks on the first date is pretty normal, but it always helps to be prepared, especially if you are the one who asked the other person out.
Also, be punctual. Another person has agreed to spend a chunk of their free time with you, so that needs to be appreciated and respected. And don't get lit up on shots, reach a level beyond buzzed, or order any drink that has the word "bomb" anywhere in the name.
Let It Go, Let It Go
A first date is like a pilot of a TV show. It determines whether there is going to be a second date and so on. All you have to do on the first date is just have fun, get to know each other, if you click, it's great! If you don't, so what? It's a first date.
Furry Backup Plans
I would recommend to not go for a dinner date or a movie date for the first date. Both are better suited for later dates. Both of them have issues like who pays for the dinner/tickets and there is no easy escape if the date is not going well.
My go to option is to just go for a coffee/tea in a nice cafe. Coffee and tea are not that expensive, so it really doesn't matter who pays and they also provide a good atmosphere to just talk to your date. Pro tip are interesting cafes like the cat cafes that exist in some cities. It is a regular cafe but with cats. If the date doesn't go well, you can still play with some cats.
Impress? But Whom?
If you're a man who feels societal obligation to pay on the first date, actually listen to what your date is telling you. I much prefer paying for myself, especially that early on in a relationship, but I've occasionally been up against guys who feel the need to pay even though I was clearly very uncomfortable with it and I knew neither of them were particularly financially better off than me anyway.
Past the point of me offering to be polite, it was quite clear I genuinely wanted to pay for myself and that was what they wanted too, they just felt pressure to keep up appearances. We ended up agreeing that he would pay in the restaurant and I would transfer him the money (this has happened multiple times to me!). It made it pretty clear that they were much more interested in appearing gentlemanly to the wait staff than making me comfortable - remember who you're trying to impress!
Let Them Come To You
As a guy, no touching/kissing on a first date. If they are interested, women will try to touch your arm/hand. I never initiate touching because if you touch them and they pull away, it's game over. The most I'll ever do on a first date is touch their back as I guide them through a door and maybe a hug at the end of the night.
Besides, I like to spend the first date getting to know them. When you're worried about kissing them or how much you can touch them, it's really distracting and turns into a mental tug of war. I like to alleviate that and just have fun and get to know them. Plus, it puts your dates mind at ease and they're not trying to play defense. I've found it's just better for everyone if you don't even think about it.
Takin' Care Of Yoself
People don't realize how important this is but TAKE A SHOWER RIGHT BEFORE YOUR DATE!!! Put on deodorant and a small amount of cologne/perfume. You want to smell good if they get up close but not be overpowering.
Keep It Busy
This is kind of my thing, but I like putting together first dates where we do some kind of activity. Of course it depends on a lot of factors, but I especially like dates where we do something with our hands. Plopping down when you first meet someone and trying to have a natural 2 hour conversation with someone is pretty difficult in any context, and so keeping your hands busy takes a lot of the edge off.
Take The Pressure Off
Honestly, going on a double date for our first date is probably what made me score my fiancé. I'm such an awkward person but I was comfortable being around the other couple and ultimately made me open up to him. He didn't call me for 3 days but I'm finding out that's because that's what his roommate told him to do. So standard. But 2.5 years later and we're hopefully still getting married 10/3/2020!
I had to stop watching talent shows years ago because while I got to see some really enjoyable acts—especially singers, of which there are a seemingly endless number—I grew sick and tired of how scripted everything felt.
For one thing, I hate overt sentimentalty because it can ring very false, and that's how I've felt whenever I've had to sit through any sob stories. Everyone has a sob story.
The music swells and immediately we'll hear about someone's cancer diagnosis or the fact they lost their house due to foreclosure or that their father died and that afterward they found bodies in his shed and learned he was a notorious serial killer...
Okay, that last one might have been made up. But my point stands.
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor TheCheeto4 asked the online community,
"What is something that you find incredibly cringe, but you think other people wouldn't?"
"You just reminded me..."
"You just reminded me of those Facebook posts that give instructions to prove who is/isn't a "real friend", always ask you to share afterwards. Like a copy-paste friendship test."
I never bother with those. I always ignore them and I'm okay with that.
"People exaggerating how quirky, different or relatable they are."
You just described every manic pixie dream girl in Bushwick.
"People singing at me. I have no idea what to do and feel cringe the entire time. Some people love just having people sing to them though."
Many people feel super awkward when this happens... especially when it happens in a restaurant... on their birthday.
"Starting a Go Fund Me..."
"Starting a Go Fund Me the second news of a tragedy gets out. There was an accident by me, and there were two competing GFMs fighting over who was closer to the victim."
They do that so they can skiff the funds. People have no shame.
"I couldn't fathom..."
"Public vlogs. I couldn't fathom walking around the city holding a camcorder on a stick and talking to myself."
I hate them and don't understand why people would watch some rando walking around, going about his day. No thank you.
"The judges crying on those talent shows on TV."
Sob stories always increase your chances of entering and lasting longer on those shows.
"I love that unspoken thing where talent show judges act all surprised that the ugly person actually has a great voice!"
The Susan Boyle effect (and she wasn't even all that great to begin with, but it's the perfect example).
"Dating profiles and bios. I just can’t not feel weird about advertising my self to randos."
Always awkward. Even worse when you meet someone interesting and they are nothing like their profile at all.
"Turning on music/singing loudly in public places. I always listen to music in my headphones."
I would never. It's the height of rudeness.
"If someone is going..."
"Filming yourself doing acts of kindness. If someone is going to do something nice for me, and they film me and post that online I’ll be pissed."
It's everywhere. Social media is a pain.
Remember the last time you cringed to some of these? You probably do. It's the worst, isn't it?
Have some cringeworthy moments of your own to share? Tell us more in the comments below!
Two people getting together for the first time and feeling the undeniable chemistry between them is an enchanting discovery.
Without anything being verbally communicated, a person feeling a mutual romantic passion is the spark that potentially can ignite a long-lasting relationship.
However, that spark can also burn out when passions are too high, and that gut feeling indicating a fling was over before it started is never a welcome feeling.
Curious to hear about the negative dating experiences of strangers, Redditor LynxExplorer asked:
"What made you realize the relationship was over?"
Sometimes, the inner voices of reason doesn't register, and outside indicators sound the alarm to let scorned lovers know that romance is dead.
A Third Party
"When I got a Facebook message from another dude saying 'your wife is cheating on us.' He thought we had one of those open relationships."
"Editing to add: this happened a little over ten years ago. I got custody of the kid, I’m remarried, great job, new house, I’m doing good. And I also laugh about it when I think back on it."
"I once googled 'how do you know when a relationship is over' and the top suggestion was 'you google it.'"
"When I finally learned to listen to her actions, not her words."
These Redditors reflected back on their relationships only to realize the love in their relationships have disappeared some time ago.
"When contempt enters the picture. Hard to explain what contempt is, but once it's there it is done for."
"There's nothing like having someone you had an amazing time just have disgust for anything you do. Oh and the glare is deadly."
"Luckily by the time I got there I already made up my mind and stopped playing her victim blaming. We both had rough lives but you cut yourself to manipulate me."
Alone In Love
"when i was crying more than laughing. constant hurt and confusion, didn’t feel like the love was reciprocated."
Waiting For It To End
"I realized that I wouldn't care if he cheated on me and would've been quite happy if he left me for someone else. I felt trapped and didn't know how to leave at the time"
"Edit: We have a child together and share custody, so he will always be in my life, but it's still better than having to walk on eggshells in my own home."
"I'm very sorry to those of you going through this now. I hope you find happiness one day."
A Powerful Yearning
"When I started fantasizing about what it would be like to be completely alone."
These are just downright cruel and unforgiving discoveries.
Sliding Into DMs
"When I found sexts between her and my 'friend.'"
"He kept breaking up with me and then making up with me. Broke up with me on my birthday (because he wasn't getting my undivided attention as my best friend was there), called me for 6 months after trying to get back with me. Called me a 'f'king weasel.' His family still tries to reach out over 11 years later."
Whatever happened to communicating with your significant other when something is off in a relationship?
Sure, this is an uncomfortable conversation to have, but it's far more effective to discuss solutions or compromises.
Isn't it worse to let resentment build to the point where regrettable actions or words further destroy relationships?
Talk it out. You'll be a better person for it.
People have long engaged in passionate debates about their firm beliefs on any particular subject, the popular ones being religion and politics.
Those arguing on both sides of religious or political debates seldom see eye-to-eye with their opponents and are unable to find common ground.
But there are other arguments that are equally as passionate which people are not willing to negotiate, or at the very least, have some wiggle room for compromise.
Curious to hear some examples, Redditor lllSnowmanlll asked:
"What's your strongest opinion that's not political religious or moral?"
We are constantly inundated with marketing ads sneaking their way into our daily interactions on social media.
Enough is enough.
Audio Assualt In Ads
"Radio ads that have honking horns or sirens should be illegal. As should billboards."
Focus On The Product, Please
"If I buy a car, I want to own it without paying a subscription to use the radio or heated steering wheel."
"Ads with the skip button are more effective than ones without."
"If an ad has a skip button you can choose whenever you’re interested in said product or not. This provides more clear info to advertisers too."
"An unskippable ad makes a person associate the company with a negative experience, therefore downgrading the company."
When it comes to our well-being, these Redditors believe the following are of utmost importance.
Ready For The Weekend
"Weekends are sacred and you can pry my free saturday out of my cold dead hands. And even then good luck because i will have hot-glued it to my hands."
"Jokes aside, self care and de-stressing are important. Take care of yourself people!"
"Edit: for everyone saying this comment is indeed political/religious: i'm just saying that having some time off to recharge or take care of personal stuff is important. It does not matter when or how that time off is, as long as you have some. I just want people to be healthy."
It's Time To Let Go
"My boss asked me to come in on Saturday next month. Every Saturday. All month."
"In response, I took off all the Fridays. Due to corporate policy, he can’t deny it. At the end of the month, I’ll be quitting. This is the fifth time in less than a year he’s tried to get me to do regular overtime, and I’ve had enough. If he wants someone working on Saturday, he can do it himself."
"EDIT: I’m getting tired of all the people saying I should have 'just said no,' so let me explain why I didn’t."
"I’ve been at this company two years, and I’ve been 'just saying no' since day one. I was literally asked to stay late on my first day. For a while I did it because COVID had just started and I didn’t want to lose my job. I was very lucky to have a job at all and I knew it."
"But the demands for more overtime, more work, more responsibilities, it all kept growing. Soon, I was working 10 or 11 hours a day Mon-Sat and another 3 or 4 hours most Sundays. I was doing the work of three people and barely making enough money to live. Keep in mind I didn’t get paid for most of this overtime, maybe half of it. No OT bonus to speak of."
"Finally, after eight months of this, I put my foot down. I went back to 40 hour weeks, no overtime unless it’s payed and I choose to do it. My superiors weren’t happy, but replacing me wasn’t easy and they knew it, so they had to deal with it."
"Lately they’ve started pushing me to do more overtime again, but they still refuse to pay me for it. So, I’m done. I’m already planning on moving, but my plans to transfer to a different location are now out the window. I’m way past my limit with this company, they’re lucky I’m still here at all. So no, I won’t 'just say no.' I’ve been saying it for months and they don’t listen.
"Swimming should be taught to every child."
The following opinions are about our interactions with the public.
"If you take a sh*t at public toilets, FLUSH!!!"
The Stigma Of Naiveté
"People should learn that saying 'I don't know' is a perfectly acceptable thing to say, and very often the most accurate."
"Rerack your weights, you meaningless excuse for intelligent life!"
"Drivers who don't indicate when turning are selfish scum."
When using the elevator or public transportation, please let the passengers off before batter-ramming your way in, please.
The doors will eventually shut automatically but will not crush you if are entering the departed cabin at the last minute.
There's no rush.
That's the thing with people. Everyone's in a hurry to get from point A to B but cutting people off on the freeway or jamming your way into an emptying elevator will not get you places any faster.
Not only is it annoying, it's also dangerous.
And I'm done with my PSA. Thank you, kindly.
Some of these modern medicines can really pack a wallop.
Remember that Taylor Swift video her mom took of her?
That was too good.
Patients teeter between a laugh riot and a hideous, dramatic mess.
Either way, it's pretty entertaining.
Redditor DvS_Insanity wanted to hear about what we all mumble when under the influence before surgery.They asked:
"Anesthesiologists of Reddit, what was something you won’t forget hearing from someone that was under?"
I haven't really been under so deep I expressed these kinds of thoughts. I'm ok with skipping surgery, actually.
FingeredKung Fu Wtf GIF by A24Giphy
"I ask a patient after surgery how he feels. He opens his eyes, stares me dead-on and says 'with my fingers.' Then he goes right back to sleep."
'hand... hand please'
"I had an ovarian cyst removed a year ago and woke up from the anesthesia saying 'hand... hand please.' and making 'grabby hands' with both my hands until the nurses finally came over and held my hands for about five minutes while I just smiled and tried to go back to sleep. I hadn't done that in a decade. I used to do it to my dad all the time as a kid to express that I wanted to hold his hand while I slept."
'Ooo ithh a robot'
"My boyfriend at the time had just gotten his wisdom teeth removed, on the ride home with his mouth full of gauze, he gets a call on his cell phone. He answered it and just starts talking away, whoever it was on the other side could not possibly understand a word he was saying with all the gauze in his mouth. But man, he had a lot to talk about and they apparently didn't hang up..."
"After about 5 minutes of this unintelligible phone conversation, he looks at me and says 'Ooo ithh a robot' and gives me the phone. I put it to my ear, and the whole time it's been the Walgreens pharmacy automated notice simply stating his prescription is ready for pickup, playing on repeat. Probably for the best."
"I’m an anesthesiologist. The best story was a 40-some year old woman for appendectomy, said while I’m giving the propofol to induce anesthesia. She said 'oh I don’t remember it tasting like that before' (slurred). I said 'what does it taste like?' Since propofol doesn’t usually elicit a taste reaction. She almost yelled 'DEEEZ NUTS,' and was promptly under anesthesia thereafter. There have been other stories, but this one has the entire OR staff rolling laughing for minutes after she was under."
“AHHHH”Oh My Love GIF by WWEGiphy
"After an operation on a patient's neck, he woke up and yelled 'AHHHH' then grabbed his junk with both hands and was like 'oh thank God it’s still there' then immediately passed out again."
People are funny with no censor. And dialogue dangerous...
"My personal story. When I had my wisdom teeth out, I kept holding a fake camera up to my face saying 'you're beautiful' and making clicking noises while I was under. I'm a professional photographer and my dental surgeon ended up booking a session with me a year later."
"I woke up from gallbladder surgery confused as to why my mom wasn’t there (I was 18 and looking for my mom). The nurse informed me I had cussed out my entire family and they sent them home and put me on a no visitor list, only for me to wakeup at 2am with no memory making them call my mom back. Another time I woke up and made horrifically inappropriate jokes."
"I told a nurse she was pissing me off because I didn’t like the automatic blood pressure cuff. Another I refused to listen to followup orders until I had a chicken sandwich (my negotiations were not met). I’m a real treat after anesthesia but I get a lot of this done at the office my mom works at so she can warn them lol."
'That's my wife for ya'
"My aunt got rushed to the hospital for abnormal heart rate - but it wasn't a heart attack or stroke, but her heart was going at like 200 beats per minute or whatever it was. They had to put her under so they could shock her heart back to normal. As they're taking her under, the doctor says something like 'Okay, in it goes' and she immediately quips with 'That's what she said.' All the doctors and nurses busted a gut laughing and told my uncle when he got there. He just shrugged and said 'That's my wife for ya.'"
"One summer I was home from college and my dad needed me to pick him up after his very first colonoscopy. He was nervous so I got there early. The nurse called me back and asked me to help wake him up, as they were having some trouble. I go back and am making chit chat. 'Oh dad, you’ve got those cool booties on!' He raised his head a little bit to look at them then yelled, 'Booty call!' He is a Presbyterian pastor. A moment I will treasure forever."
HugsKat Graham Netflix GIF by GIF RegistryGiphy
"Apparently, when I had surgery to remove my Bartholin’s gland (a gland at the entrance of the vagina that can get an abscess), they asked me how I felt as soon as I was awake. I said I felt like I got attacked by an elephant and then I wanted to hug everyone."
Oh, the things we'll say when under the influence.
Do you have similar experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.