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Aggravated People Rant About Social Customs We Need To Stop Immediately

Aggravated People Rant About Social Customs We Need To Stop Immediately

Aggravated People Rant About Social Customs We Need To Stop Immediately

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Society has some weird, outdated customs.

In several states, for instance, it is illegal for more than three women to live in a house together because it is then considered a brothel. And we all know that's outdated and kind of misogynistic, but for some reason, nobody seems in any hurry to change those laws. So when ruj00 took to the internet to ask:

What social custom needs to be retired?

We were excited when it forced us to take a look at some of the dumb things we do as a society.

Work Yourself Hard

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I quit a warehouse job recently due to sh-t pay and terrible working conditions. $10/hr after taxes and union fees are taken out brings it down to around $8/hr. Only scheduled for 10-15 hours a week despite me being promised 30. Running around in a 100° F warehouse while covered in dirt and dust. Sweat + dirt + dust = constantly runny nose, sneezing out black stuff, breaking out in acne from touching your face, not to mention how it ruins most of your clothes.

My dad gave me sooo much shit for it. "You're f-cking pathetic. You're always looking for the easy way out. You don't know how to work hard."

You're g-d damned right! If I can earn the same amount of money doing an easier job in an air conditioned environment you bet your -ss I will. My dad is so old school it hurts. He told me he wouldn't work for a different company even if he was offered a 40% raise, as leaving would be "disloyal" to the company he currently works for. The same man that complains about how much he hates most of the people he works with.

"When I was your age I was working in a factory doing the same sh-t you were doing."

Cool, but like shouldn't you be glad that it isn't necessary for me to do that in order to live?

Repeat After Me: I Need A Vacation

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Being shamed for turning down overtime at work.

Sorry, but if I only have one day off this entire week, I'm f-cking taking it. If you ask me to come in on that day and I say no, asking "Are you sure? Think of the money" over and over won't change anything. It normally ends up so that they keep badgering me until I flat out give a made up excuse. Now I feel bad for lying, you clearly KNOW I'm bullsh-tting, but it's the only way to get you to stop.

I just need a day to myself. Gimme a break.

Solitude

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People not getting that sometimes you want some alone time and there is nothing wrong with that.

Proof

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Having to post yourself doing something good on social media or it never happened mentality. I just went through the scariest storm of my life here in Houston with Hurricane Harvey. Tons of people were posting pictures of them helping demo walls in houses which is totally fine and dandy. But people were actually complaining about how others "waited too long to start helping" as if just because I didn't post the DAY after the hurricane that I was inside a house busting down walls that I never helped. Sorry I just dont need to film myself or document myself to prove that I was helping, not everyone needs to give themselves the ol' social media pat on the back. It's so f-cking annoying the type of society we live in now.

Prom Costs

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Extremely expensive prom dresses.

I built a $1200 Computer few months back and people where like you spent 1200 on a computer you crazy. Then my sister spent well my Dad spent $800 on my sisters prom dress and no one bats a eye.

Honestly she only used that dress once and a computer i can use for years to come.

Private Presents

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Opening gifts in front of the gifter.

I was exposed to the opposite custom while in Asia, where gifts are opened in private. It's so refreshing. You don't have to feign delight over something unwanted, unneeded, or that you're just going to return or regift later.

Need Experience To Get Experience

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Having experience for entry level jobs. If I'm applying for a job at Mickey D's, a cart associate, or anything that is going to pay me minimum wage, require nothing of me customer service wise, I should never lose an opportunity to get a job because I don't have enough experience. I had to deal with this, and my brother is dealing with it. I shouldn't have to know people to get a job at fast food joints. Service industry, low pay jobs, exist because you can literally hire people who have no experience for them, yet my brother hears he doesn't have work experience and that they're hiring a person with one more job worth of experience before him.

Toxic Masculinity

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Men are too tough to have feelings. Everyone has feelings, it's part of being human.

Let's Talk About Checks, Baby

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Not discussing your wages/salary with co-workers. The only reason this custom exists is to keep people getting screwed from knowing they're being screwed.

It's too late to 'pologize

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Public apologies that mean nothing. A company/public figure would be forced to release an apology and it would just be the most passive agressive and non-apologetic letter.

In The Chopper

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Helicopter parenting. This is not a healthy parenting style, but is sadly becoming the norm.

Since not everyone knows this term, a helicopter parent is a common parenting style (in the U.S., and I believe other western countries) were a parent is overly involved in their child's life, makes the child the center of the universe, and shelters the kid from any negative life experiences or consequences. Examples: older children not allowed to play anywhere unsupervised; parents applying for jobs on behalf of their kids and attending interviews with them; parents making teens download an app that tells the parent where they are at all times; parents flipping their shit when their kid gets a single bad grade, blaming the teacher vs. the kid. Then, these kids are magically supposed to grow up to be competent, well-adjusted adults, but have never experienced consequences and have been spoiled and sheltered their whole lives. Parents who don't helicopter are accused of child abuse and neglect, in extreme cases.

Souvenirs

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The expectation that if you go on vacation that you need to bring back gifts. I was on vacation. I enjoyed myself and spent my hard earned money doing it. Why should I bring a gift back for people? They are more than welcome to go on their own vacation.

The Media Ruined My Life

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The CNN effect.

We are bombarded with information about everything that happens 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. We have no time to process what happens and understand it before the next story breaks. We don't have time to make our own opinions and just accept what our preferred media tells us, assuming they are non bias.

Unwanted Physical Contact

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Might just be local, but forcing kids to hug people they don't like/aren't comfortable with.

"Oh, honey! That's your great-aunt's cousin's daughter's mom! Give her a hug!"

"Hug your grandma, you'll hurt her feelings if you don't."

I HATED this as a kid, i hate seeing it pushed on other kids now. I'll flat out tell the kid, "You will NOT hurt my feelings and i won't be upset if you don't want a hug." My nephew is on the spectrum, and as a kid we'd high five because that's what he was okay with.

Seriously, my son is going to grow up being told that it doesn't matter if it's his cousin, grandma, mom or dad, future wife-NOBODY gets to guilt or threaten yoi into physical contact.

Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend

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Diamond engagement jewelry.

The entire mined diamond industry is filthy.

Artificial diamonds have a much nicer sheen because better purity (just like cultured pearls) and can be made for a few bucks a pop.

The fact that "mined" natural diamonds still command a premium is entirely based on perception and deceit. This too will pass though.

Shiva?

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Funerals. $10k to see a corpse. It's so odd and a bit morbid IMO. Why not just get together and reminisce at a house or restaurant?

Clean Sweep

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Having to have every room in your house spotless for people coming to visit during holidays. I don't mind sweeping and vacuuming common areas, but why does my room need to be spotless. We aren't selling the house. Since I was away at college my mother decided to clean my room since relatives are visiting next week and now doesn't know where she put my coin collection, my german crystal whiskey decanter that was a gift, or half of my vinyl records.

College Alternatives

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Schools telling kids that college is for everyone and acting like trade school and community college aren't legitimate.

When I was in high school a couple years ago, not only did they require teachers to devote a full day to pressuring people to go to a university, but we had an assembly where everyone who's been accepted to college got called up individually to walk to the center of the gym and be applauded.

I'm sorry if this is taboo, but some people are not emotionally prepared for college at 18, and some people simply don't have what it takes. I sure wasn't, and I'm naturally pretty Intelligent.

There's no reason my slacker best friend who counted his sick days so he could take the maximum allowed every year, and challenged himself to never read a single book for English his entire scholastic career, should be pressured in to taking $20,000 in debt simply because our culture says to before he decides it's too hard and drops out, or knocks a girl up and drops out, or any number of permutations thereof.

That said, we really need to teach civics in high school to create an environment where someone can leave high school ready to go in to a trade or whatever and be prepared to be a citizen of our country.

Gender Norms Are Dead

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Guys always having to make the first move in a relationship. Women (at least most I personally know) complain so often that men are horrible at picking up signals. Well then why don't they make the first move and be up front? It's too scary? Afraid you'll look creepy? Afraid of rejection? Yeah, welcome to our lives, shits terrifying, but give us a break pleaaaase

My girlfriend made the first move when I was taking it too slow. That was 3 years ago. Just go for it. Having someone openly and blatantly express interest in a guy is so rare it will likely make their week

Let Me Frown In Peace

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Someone telling you to smile. I surprised no one has mention this yet. There this one annoying front desk lady at my gym that constantly ask me to smile when I'm coming in to scan my ID. I don't want to smile, so stop asking. It's pretty rude to tell others to?

Old Wives' Tales People Still Believe For Some Reason

"Reddit user the_spring_goddess asked: 'What is an old wives tale that people still believe?'"

Close up of an owl tilting their head to side, looking bewildered
Photo by Josh Mills

The old wives' tales.

They are the stories of legend.

I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.

Where did they originate?

WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!

You don't hear about them as much anymore.

It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.

But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.

Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:

"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"

"Wait an hour to swim after eating."

What a crock!

So many summer hours wasted.

I want revenge for that one.

Say Nothing

Giphy

"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."

LonelyMail5115

"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."

I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA

Say Something

"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."

Severe_Airport1426

"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."

crappycurtains

"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."

AlbinoShavedGorilla

Body Temps

"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."

chriseo22

"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."

"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."

apocalypticradish

Arms Down

"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."

Fatmouse84

10 Years Actually

Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine Giphy

"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."

REDDIT

"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."

Gecko-911

I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.

This tale is haunting.

High/Low

Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace Giphy

"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."

LeastFormal9366

"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."

IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI

The Cursed

"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."

"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."

SmoreOfBabylon

Stay In

"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."

"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."

worldbound0514

Dreams and Facts

"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."

"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."

mattshonestreddit

"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."

Darthdemented

Cracked

Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office Giphy

"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."

Choice-Grapefruit-44

"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."

MacyTmcterry

I love my knuckles.

Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.

lottery tickets
Erik Mclean on Unsplash

A lot of workers daydream about some day winning the lottery and being able to say goodbye to their job.

Far too many workers are unhappy with their job duties, workplace dynamics or company culture.

But with a taste for luxuries like housing and food, they keep plugging away, year after year.

However not everyone feels that way about their job.

So what are these compelling careers?

Keep reading... Show less
Therapist talking during session
Photo by Mark Williams on Unsplash

Some people stand firmly stand behind their beliefs that everyone would benefit from therapy and that therapy is life-changing.

It's because of the totally life-changing truth bombs their therapist had dropped during their sessions.

Curious, Redditor anonymiss0018 asked:

"What is a little bombshell your therapist dropped in one of your sessions that completely changed your outlook?"

Communication Issues

"'If you don’t have these problems with any other person in your life, why do you think you’re the problematic person in this one?'"

- maggiebear

"I love this. I have a 'friend' who I always seem to run into misunderstandings with. Every time we had a conversation, it somehow turned into a debate even if it was me talking about my day. The conversations were never easy."

"I always evaluate myself first and take into consideration his critiques. He was very good at convincing me that I was contradicting myself or wasn't good at communicating my thoughts."

"I NEVER had this issue with ANYONE else in my life. I kept trying to figure out where the miscommunication was coming from. In the end, I just minimized contact and now I don't run into this issue."

- chobani_yo

"I read this quote somewhere once (and probably have it a bit wrong): 'It's a waste of time arguing with someone who is determined to misunderstand you.'"

- Reddit

Emotional Regulation

"'You can’t control your emotions, but you can control what you do with them.'"

"At the time, I was a young adult who had learned zero healthy emotional regulation skills (only suppression and shaming) growing up, so this blew my mind."

- lil_mermaid

Tough Relationships

"'It sounds to me like you are trying to convince yourself to stay with your girlfriend. I'm not so sure it should be so difficult.'"

"At the time he said this, I remember it was like he said, 'The earth is flat.' I thought he was crazy when he suggested relationships don't need to be difficult. But eventually, I started to realize I was trying to change myself to stay with this person rather than just being who I am."

"It took me three more months to finally break up with her but from that day on, I vowed to never again abandon myself just to be with someone I had convinced myself was better than me."

- metric88

High-Stress Situation

"I was at a high-stress time, and I asked her how people live like this."

"She replied, 'Oftentimes they have cardiac events.' She said it as an urging to care for myself as much as possible."

- KittenGr8r

The End of Alcohol

"I was struggling with my alcoholism, and we were discussing how I had been cutting back."

"She asked what I would consider success, with regard to my drinking."

"I said I wanted to get to a point where it wasn't interfering with my daily life. I wanted to just be able to have a glass of wine at holiday dinners or family gatherings."

"She simply asked me why. Why was it important for me to drink at those times?"

"It was as if she'd turned on a light. Alcohol had always been a key ingredient in every family function, for my entire life. When I smell bourbon, I think of my uncle. When I smell vermouth, I think of my dad. Alcohol ran through almost every happy childhood memory."

"But, even more than that, I was very afraid of the explanation I'd have to give when family and friends asked why I wasn't having a drink. I had tried to quit before but failed. What if I admitted my problem, only to fall off the wagon?"

"When she asked why I didn't want to completely quit, it was the first time I saw that last part of the big picture. I'd be willing to drink myself to death in order to avoid being scrutinized, or judged for possible future failures."

"That was the day I quit. I've been sober since May 6th, 2017. 2,407 days."

- sophies_wish

Acceptance vs. Enjoyment

"'Accepting something doesn’t mean you have to like it.'"

"That took away a lot of my inner conflicts about situations because I could accept a situation without expending energy internally fighting against the injustice of it."

- alibelloc

Emotionally Immature Parents

"You are not responsible for your parents' emotional wellbeing. They are independent adults who have been on this earth for many more years than you."

- SmokedPears

Not So Lazy

"'Why do you think you're lazy?' Then she listed off all the things she knows I'm doing for my family, my job, and my life."

"It kind of blew my mind when I struggled to come up with an example."

"She also described family dysfunction as water. Some families are messed up in a way that everyone can see the huge waves across the surface. Others are better at hiding it, but there's still a riptide that you can't see unless you're also in the water."

"It made me realize that trying to keep the surface from ever rippling doesn't erase what is happening underneath."

- flybyknight665

The Harm in People-Pleasing

"'Why do you make people more comfortable when you are uncomfortable?' when talking about people pleasing and fawning."

- ERsandwich

Agree to Disagree

"'Stop trying to get everyone to agree. When you need everyone to agree, the least agreeable person has all the power.'"

This really changed my outlook on planning family events."

- freef

Grieve and Start Anew

"For context, I had a major TBI (traumatic brain injury), seizures, strokes, and all around not a fun brain time when I was 28."

"They said, 'You have to grieve the loss of yourself.'"

"Most people wanted me to go back to how I was. The f**ked up truth is that part of my brain is dead. The person everyone (including myself) knew died. I needed to grieve the loss of myself."

- squeaktoy_la

Multifaceted Identity

"They told me that my job and career is just a way to make money; it's not my life or identity. That took a lot of pressure off me."

- unfairpegasus

Breaking the Cycle

"They validated me."

"'You always talk about not wanting to do to your daughters what your mom did to you. You worry about it so much in every interaction you have ever had with them."

"But your children are 19 and 21 now. They are happy and healthy and they trust you because you’ve never abused them in any way. So I just want to validate for you that you really have broken that cycle of violence."

"You did that. And you should be proud of it. I’m proud of you for it.'"

- puppsmcgee74

The Grieving Process

"I was constantly bringing up how I felt like a completely different person after my mom died... like there was a marked difference between before and after her death."

"But once, she was asking about my hobbies, I got really into describing all the things I loved to do or at least used to do before I got into a deep depression."

"She was like, 'Wow, you seem very passionate.'"

"And I just sat there like, 'Well, I mean, I can't change what I like to do, they're still fun to do.'"

"And it's like she knew when to take a step back, because it was like, wow, I may be super depressed about my mom passing, but I'm still me. I'm still my passions and those don't go away."

"I don't know, maybe it only makes sense to be, but it really started getting me back on track."

- Hannibal680

Sharing the Load

"I've never really had friends. I've had colleagues and classmates and housemates and people who have hung out with me, but I never really felt close to any of them."

"And I did that thing you see on here sometimes; I stopped reaching out to see if I would be reached out to, and I wasn't, which I took as confirmation that they didn't really want me around, or at the very least, that they wouldn't mind my absence."

"I was talking to my therapist about people I'd been close to in college, and she told me to pick one and talk about him. So I did. After I shared some basic stuff like his name and his major etc., and a couple of anecdotes, she asked me what else I knew about him."

"And I couldn't answer. It wasn't really a broadly applicable bombshell, but she said, 'What else?' and I started crying because I realized that for as simple as the question was, my inability to answer spoke volumes."

"I've never had good friends because I've never been a good friend. I'm withdrawn and reserved and I always made others do the work to drag me out, without ever extending my own friendship in a meaningful way in return. If I wanted to have meaningful relationships with other people, I would have to build them."

"I'm still working on this, but I'm trying to make more offers and extend more friendliness to others in my daily life."

- Backupusername

The discoveries in this thread were incredibly touching and profound; it's no wonder these were lasting concepts for these Redditors.

It's important to keep ourselves open to inspiration and insights from others, as we have no idea how their experiences could help us, or how we could help them.

Aerial view of a church in a small town
Sander Weeteling/Unsplash

There's something comforting about living in a small town.

It's characterized by close communities where neighbors know each other by name and there is an abundance of kindness extended to others.

Gift-giving is a commonality, as is the sharing of recipes, and people going out of their way to help each other in a time of need.

The pace of living in small towns is also a striking contradiction to city life, where crowds of people go about their busy lives without much interaction.

Curious to hear more examples of what small town living is like, Redditor official_biz asked:

"What's the most 'small town' thing you've witnessed?"

These are positive examples of a tight-knit community.

Live Updates

"We have a village Facebook page. Every time the ice cream man drives into the village, the entire page goes ballistic. People send live updates of where the van is and which direction he's heading. The ice cream man has started accepting DMs so he knows which streets to go down."

– PyrrhuraMolinae

Brush With The Law

"I’m from a town of less than 2,000 people. When I worked at the grocery store there people would often drop off stuff for my family members because they didn’t want to drive all the way down to our house. I no longer live there but recently got a call from my daughter. She had been stopped for speeding and handed over her license and insurance which happens to be in my mother’s name. The officer goes 'Hey, you’re Donnie’s granddaughter! I ain’t gonna write you a ticket but I’m telling Donnie when I see him tomorrow cause we’re going fishing.' She replied 'I think I’d rather have the ticket.'”

- Reddit

Roadside Catchup

"The traffic on the 'main street' of my town is so sparse, two drivers going opposite directions can stop and talk to each other for a few minutes without causing any problem."

– anon

When things go wrong, people take notice without incident.

Bank Robbery

"A guy robbed a bank and everyone knew immediately who he was and the teller got mad at him."

– AlexRyang

"A local bank was robbed and one of the tellers told the police to bring her a yearbook from about ten years earlier and she would be able to point the robber out. He had been in the grade before hers in school."

– Strict_Condition_632

Wise Woman

"When I worked at the bank in town there was an older lady that had worked there through 5 mergers."

"She knew everyone, there was a young guy yelling at me one day. She walked out of the back and he immediately quieted. She went off about telling his grandmother that he was treating young women like sh*t. She also said that if he didn’t straighten up not one girl in town would ever marry him she would make sure of it."

– ilurvekittens

Intoxicated Local

"Town drunk was paralyzed and used a motorized wheelchair to get around. I was driving home one Saturday night and said town drunk was passed out in his wheelchair doing circles almost directly in the town square. Had to call his brother who came and picked him up on a rollback truck. Strapped him down and drove off into the cold dark night."

– DoodooExplosion

Grazing Over To The Bar

"In my former small town, there was an older guy who'd lost his license after getting a few DUIs. Every day, he would ride his John Deere lawnmower to the corner bar around 3PM and sit around watching TV and sipping his beer well into the night. Then he'd head the couple miles back home on his mower. He even had a little canvass shell he put on when it rained or got too cold."

– brown_pleated_slacks

It's not surprising how small town people behave differently than those who are from metropolitan areas.

Welcoming Committee

"I lived in a small town. When I moved there, people would ask, 'Whose house did you buy?'"

–MoonieNine

"Move to a small town. 30 years later, you are still the new guy."

– impiousdrifter

"I lived in a small town for most of my childhood but I wasn't "from there" because my grandparents weren't from there."

– raisinghellwithtrees

"Worked with an older guy, relative of the owner of the business, he was 73. I asked him if he was a local, he said 'no his parents moved here when he was two.'"

– realneil

A Busy Day

"Lived in a town of about 5,000: A woman walked into the DMV on a Friday, saw that there were 3 people ahead of her and left to come back another time when they weren't so busy."

– KenmoreToast

Who Let The Dogs Out?

"My dogs got out while i was working. the police called my niece's elementary school (she was a 5th grader) to get her to round them up and take them back home."

– mediocrelpn

"There was a small kennel behind the police station for runaways. They called us saying they had our dog, and moments later our dog showed up home. He broke out of jail."

– Worried_Place_917

While life in a small town sounds appealing, I don't know if I can ever live in one.

I'm so used to life in big cities, I think it would be quite unnerving to adjust in a neighborhood where everyone literally knows your business.

I would be paranoid.

And I'm sure the same could be said of life in the big city.

Would you consider making the switch to life in a different setting?