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People Over 40 Share Their Best Advice For Folks In Their 20s

People Over 40 Share Their Best Advice For Folks In Their 20s
Photo by Devin Avery on Unsplash

With each passing year, it's hard not to look back on your life, and the decisions you've made.

How you wished you'd done this or hadn't done that.

Wishing that you were brave enough to try something, or wish you'd never even heard of something you took part in.

It can be said that the time we might look back on with the most regret is our 20s, that decade of life most heavily associated with figuring out what we want to do with our lives.

Some might wish they'd accomplished more in their 20s, while others might wish they slowed things down and didn't rush into some things.

Redditor morningperzon was curious to hear from people in their 40s what advice they would give to those still enjoying the adventure that is their 20s, leading them to ask:

"People who are 40+, what’s your advice to people in their 20s?"


Be responsible

"Don't put yourself in ridiculous amounts of debt trying to portray a certain image."

"You'll spend your entire life trying to get out of the hole you dug or you'll have to declare bankruptcy."

"Set aside enough money to cover 3-6 months of expenses for emergencies just like now."

"Moreover, save now for your retirement years."

"It doesn't require much and if you have it taken directly from your paycheck you won't be inclined to not pay yourself first."


"Take care of your body."

"Exercise to maintain a healthy weight and good cardiovascular health."

"As you get older, it's much harder to maintain these."

"Enjoy the days of your youth without going overboard."

"There is nothing wrong with having a good time, yet if you are always waking up wondering what happened last night, why you can't remember how you spent so much money or you always have a hangover; you should tone it down a bit."

"Don't take advice or criticism as a personal attack."

"Most times the people who care about you have observed behavior in you which is off-putting, doesn't reflect who you really are or could be or would make you a more rounded person.- Thomasgraham76

Respect your body, make good choices

"I'm going to post this b/c I know someone young is struggling w/ addiction rn."

"Don't waste your life."

"Don't wake up at 39 and let that sh*t hit you like a ton of bricks that you've pissed away half of your life on drugs."- scorpiobw1980

Love yourself and be happy!

"Don't let yourself get out of shape."

"If you're addicted to nicotine, stop. If not, don't ever start."

"VERY few companies out there will ever give a sh*t about you."

"You should never feel any loyalty to them."

"Ask him/her/them out."

"Worst case you get a 'no'."

"Life isn't a competition, no one wins and no one gets out alive."

"Be happy as much as possible." - user deleted

Happy Season 9 GIF by The OfficeGiphy

Don't be beholden to plans and expectations

"Don't fall for the trap that your life needs to be one long narrative that you should be building."

"Life is best when it's a bunch of happy moments that just happen to be connected."

"Don't try to make your life into a novel, make it a book of poems."- Ok-Wallaby9642

Save those dentist bills...

"Brush your teeth."- Dazzling-Adeptness11

"Take care of your teeth."- iuytrefdgh436yujhe2

"Floss your teeth really well, at least once a week."

"Will save you money in the future."- Otherwise_Picture_77

Teeth Tooth GIF by OllieTorresGiphy

Stay loose and limber

"Stretch."

"Start stretching."

"Do yoga."

"Keep stretching."

"Never get out of the habit."

"You don't have to be in the best shape to be happy, but stretching makes everything feel better, keeps it feeling good, and means that when you inevitably hurt yourself at some point in the future it's easier to recover." - User deleted

"You may feel invincible now."

"Every person in their 20s does."

"And then you hit 30."

"And you start noticing things like it hurts when you jump down the last two stairs instead of walking down them, or when you wake up, or just, from existing."

"In my 40s now, and I'm still doing just fine, and find my daily yoga practice matters more than any other exercise I've ever done."- JoshG1981

Warm Up Golf GIF by Farmers Insurance ®Giphy

Find out who are your real friends

"Ghost your sh*tty friends."

"They are as much of a liability to your health and future as any other malicious factors in your life right now."

"And if you have to ask if they're a sh*tty friend, they are a sh*tty friend."

"Ghost them."

"Now."- MisterAmmosart

Save Those Pennies

"Put $ away NOW."

"You don't think old age will ever come your way, but just today you got closer to it."

"'Time goes by like hurricane, faster than a speeding train" Allman Bros.- kittykittyspank

"Start saving money even if it is only 5 or 10 dollars a week."

"Put it into a free stock account with the money tossed at a big corporation and just let it sit."- EelBitten

Pig Save GIF by Banco ItaúGiphy

Bottom line, live your best life!

"Save money."

"Start an investment fund."

"Develop good habits with your diet and physical activity."

"Don’t obsess over relationships or lack there of."

"Only follow your bliss if you have a good idea or plan on how you’re going to make a career out of it."

"Lastly, don’t live life virtually."

"Keep your social media in check."

"Don’t let it become your life."

"Go outside."- No-Philosopher-4793

If you have an addiction that is affecting your life deal with it now."

"Eliminate it or go to and participate in recovery."

"Lift weights and exercise."

"Your body is your temple and you will feel great in your 40s if you keep up with an exercise routine."

"Your boss does not care about you."

"You may think that you're special or talented and you very well might be."

"Your boss and your company does not care about you."

"Do your required hours and then go home, don't give extra."

"If you decide to get married, this shouldn't and isn't a thing for everyone BTW, make sure it's not just for love but to have a partner and a best friend."

"I'm so lucky I have a great wife."

"Having kids is a wonderful experience."

"While I personally think it's the best thing I've ever done it's certainly not for everyone and you will give up a lot of your personal life, hobbies, time alone and everything that you once did for yourself."

"Focus on having good people in your life."

"Eliminate the toxic people that can't change."

"Challenge yourself everyday, learn everyday and do new and exciting things."

"Travelling the world on the cheap has been a most rewarding experience."

"See and meet all different kinds of people from all walks of life."- ThorSaw

Cbs Live Your Best Life GIF by The Late Show With Stephen ColbertGiphy

Continue to strive for excellence.

No matter if it kills you, make a daily routine to balance the following areas of your life."

"Studying, Work, Spirituality, Physical Fitness, and Cleanliness in environment/Stellar face/teeth/bodily grooming habits."

"Entertainment comes last, but daily if even for a 1/2 hr, so you don't binge or don't resort to toxic binge-type behavior."

"Don't drink."

"Don't do drugs ever."

"if you have, stop."

"They may expand your mind for a moment."

"But it's like making a hole in the walls of your house."

"Even when you lock your doors, something crawly can get in."

"Never take something internally that will leave you in a state more vulnerable than you already are."

"When working, make an LLC and put yourself and spouse and children on payroll."

"Set aside 1/3rd of your paycheck forever."

"1/3 rd of THAT will be used in stable return endeavors."

"Another 1/3rd will go into gold."

"Or similar store of value."

"The final 1/3rd will go into saving to buy land/real estate."

"Build your credit thru 20 levels and learn how to spend other people's money and make a profit on it."

"Work on things on a daily basis."

"Chip away slowly every day."

"This is how excellence is built."

"Never leave anything for last minute."

"Know yourself."

"STEP on your ego."

"If your ego doesn't like something, do it."

"If your ego likes something, delay it."

"Find a guide, someone to follow and learn from."

"A true master."

"Don't be so proud that you won't bend the knee to learn from masters."

"Understand your weaknesses."

"Learn from them."

"Laziness is a killer."

"Anger, Pride, Jealousy and Stubbornness will destroy you."

"Leave these."

"You don't have to control everything in other people's lives."

"Your partner or children."

"Advise, enforce but don't force. control everything in YOUR life."

"Your behavior, your speech, your actions."

"Being in control of yourself, and the ability to RELY on yourself as circumstances change around you, is a sustaining reward."

"Travel."

"Meet people from all over the world."

"You share the earth with them for a reason."

"Do not be insular."

"Share food, culture, intentions and laughter with people who look nothing like you."

"This will turn you into a real human being."

"Give back as much as you can."

"Give in a way that if you give with your right hand, your left hand is unaware."

"Beware people who compliment you."

"They want something from you."

"Learn self-defense or a martial art."

"When interacting with people on a business level."

"Meaning, money will exchange hands for a service."

"Prior to meeting with them, outline what the cost will be and what the reasonable expected result will be."

"It will make the experience easier."

"Written contract for everything that will have long-term effects on your life."

"Pictures.":

"Record video as much as you can before, during after."

"Make records of everything that can have legal repercussions, like landlord leases, buying cars, homes, business partnerships and learn to organize and preserve these digitally for easy accessibility."

"Just off the top of my head."

"Good luck."- BuzzLawldrin

Be a gracious guest

"Never show up to a party, no matter how small, empty handed."

"It doesn’t have to be expensive and it doesn’t have to be a lot."

"Just bring something in the realm of food."- melissastandard

Needless to say, life should always be about moving forward, and not looking back with regret.

Though the younger generations will no doubt be thankful 20 years from now for getting this advice.

If they listen to it, that is...

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley

Remember

"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt

Imagination

"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."

RedditbOiiiiiiiiii

"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."

monobarreller

Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."

– GTFOakaFOD

"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip

Yikes!

"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User

"Oh."

– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"

Sensations

Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."

PeachesnPain

Recovery

"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."

good_golly99

Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."

rayrayrayray

Free

The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."

TooReDTooHigh

This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.

Shocked

Giphy

"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."

Admirable_Buyer6528

The SOB

"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”

1-cupcake-at-a-time

Colors

"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"

Hannah_LL7

"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"

huntokarrr

The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."

Fluffy-Hotel-5184

Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."

Hot-Refrigerator6583

Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.

Shopping

"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.