
Weirded Out People With Step Parents Younger Than Them Reveal What It's Really Like
[rebelmouse-image 18348043 is_animated_gif=They say age is just a number, but what if that number belongs to your step-parent and it's smaller than yours? How would you feel about your parent? How would you feel about the younger person they married?
Reddit user HotPocketPotato asked "Redditors who have a Step-Father/Mother younger than you, what's your story?"
Here are some honest answers from people whose parents opted for the May-December romance route.
8 Years
[rebelmouse-image 18348033 is_animated_gif=My dad is 71. Six months ago he left my mom for a 25 year old. I'm 33 and my sister is 28.
His new girlfriend is 6 months pregnant. They're not married because my parents' divorce hasn't gone through yet, but I guess once that happens I'll have a step mom who is 8 years younger than me and a newborn half sister.
This will be my dad's 3rd marriage.
4 Years
[rebelmouse-image 18348038 is_animated_gif=The story is simply that my father is irresponsible. It was just the two of us when I was growing up, but he made it clear he was resentful having to take care of me. He's in his 60s. I'm 34, my older half sister turns 40 in a few days. My youngest half brother just turned 2. I'm sure I have siblings I don't even know about. His current wife is maybe 30 and by far the oldest woman he's ever been with. He cheated on his last wife with her. His last wife was 19 when they met. I always make sure that his baby mamma's know that I'll always be there for them and their kids when he leaves, because he's GOING to leave. It's interesting watching how surprised they are when he does.
2 Years
[rebelmouse-image 18361981 is_animated_gif=Okay, so my dad loves controlling people.
He used to always go on about wanting a Chinese wife because she'd be really grateful and meek enough towards him that he wouldn't get any arguments or independent thought from her unlike an American/English wife.
Well not long after declaring the above, he met and married a 21 year old Chinese woman (he's late 50s). I was 23 at the time. The way he treats her in public is revolting, he is so condescending and talks real slow and firm like someone would to a toddler. He tells her off and calls her names.
It was so sad to see, I don't know for sure but she may have left him as, when I was last in contact with him, he never brought her with him or spoke about her.
1 Year
[rebelmouse-image 18352475 is_animated_gif=I'm a guy, 23. My dad is 64, was 40 when I was born, and last year he married a woman who was 22 at the time.
My parents weren't really together, never got married, and split soon after I was born. My mom's black, and my dad's an Iranian who came to the U.S. in the 70s as a student and never left (revolution in Iran meant he was stuck with no visa). My dad left school, was pretty transient, moved up and down the East coast, and eventually settled in New Jersey, where I'm from.
I didn't keep much contact with my dad, but I started talking to him again a few years ago. He didn't have much companionship, so eventually he went back to Iran, met a woman who already had a kid and was divorced, looking to make a better life for herself. So my dad married her, and she and her son came over just before the Trump ban.
My dad talks pretty freely about his feelings toward his wife, and hers toward him. He'll say things like, "Obviously she doesn't love me. She just used me to come to the U.S."
Younger
[rebelmouse-image 18352474 is_animated_gif=I found out my dad died because he stroked out while in a motel with someone younger than me. This was (to our knowledge) the third time he'd cheated in a long term relationship, and he was already married to someone 20 years younger than him.
8 Years
[rebelmouse-image 18361982 is_animated_gif=I'm 34, my dad is 65 and he's in a relationship with someone who's 26 (so 8 years younger than me).
They've been together for 3-3.5 years and are happy together, and I'm happy for them.
At first it was a bit awkward for me, up to the point that it took me a half year before I decided to meet them together (at first I just met with my dad alone every week). I was mainly worried about my dad (still am, a bit), he came out of a long relationship that went really bad (got cheated on after 8-9 years) and he had a really rough time with it. So I was scared he would end up in the same depression if this one went bad as well (not because of cheating, but the age difference eventually could catch up to them, as an issue).
I've spoken openly about my worries with my dad, a few times, along the last 3 years, and it will take time for them to actually go away... There's a 38 year age gap and my dad, at some point, will get health issues because of age and I'm cautious of what will happen. Both of them assure me they love each other and that they'll take care of each other, no matter what.
I fully believe they believe that, I fully believe they love each other, that's very apparent from the way they interact. And I'm very happy they feel that way with each other and found that happiness.
But I'll always be worried that when the typical health issues start, someone will have to do the day to day care and that brings a lot of strain on a relationship, even couples who've been together for 30+ years and are roughly the same age. In this case, they'd potentially be together for less than 10 years when it starts (I hope my dad remains 100% healthy till he's 100, but realistically...).
So, happy they are happy, cautiously optimistic for the future.
5 Years
[rebelmouse-image 18352472 is_animated_gif=My parents married young, as was typical in the 60s. A decade into it he was with our babysitter. He eventually left our mom and married her. That only lasted a few years. Dad then played knight in shining armor to a succession of young women 'down on their luck', 'on the outs with their parents', 'raising kids on their own with no other help', etc. Same pattern over and over. Swore he wasn't intimate with them but who knows. They were always about the same age - late teens to early twenties - no matter how old my dad got, or how much older we, his children, were compared to them.
Ultimately his work took him to the Philippines...ah, you can see where this is going, can't you...and became involved with a young woman there. He said they were just friends and all his many trips there were to help her and her family. We rolled our eyes. Eventually Dad informed us he had married her so she could come to Canada for a better life. She is about five years younger than the youngest one of us.
I don't have any beef with her. She's a kind and decent person, and hardworking, albeit too submissive and deferential to my dad. I'm sure that's part of what he likes about her. My problem is with my dad alone, who has repeatedly proven himself to be a self-centered narcissist fixated on younger women. He congratulates himself for 'saving' all these people and helping them out of their miserable lives when he's never had the time of day for his own kids or grandkids. He's lied and broken promises his whole life, and I have no respect for him. When I married, I would not let him walk me down the aisle.
5 Years
[rebelmouse-image 18352478 is_animated_gif=Dad is a serial monogamist? He has been married 4 times. This last wife is 5 yrs younger than me. She is 25. My dad is 52. She gave birth to my brother last year which resulted in an interesting conversation with my kids. Me showing my 6 and 5 yr old's a picture of their new uncle.
Me: look guys this is your new uncle isn't he cute?
Kids: that's not an uncle THAT'S A BABY!
Older and Younger
[rebelmouse-image 18361983 is_animated_gif=My mother's husband is two years younger than my husband. My husband is seven years older than me. So my mom's guy isn't younger than me but it still is a weird dynamic.
My mom jokes that I always dated older and she always dated younger so it was bound to happen. We actually made a pact when I was twenty that I wouldn't date anyone older than her and she promised she wouldn't date anyone younger than me. We both had some close calls but held true to the pact.
The only really weird thing is watching our husband's interact. They are serious best friends whenever there is a family get together. If we can't find one we look for the other. There isn't a cookout or birthday party where they decide to give each other piggyback rides or cake eating contest or something silly and fun. My favorite thing is when my husband yells "You aren't my real dad, you can't tell me what to do! ". They are goofballs.
1 Year
[rebelmouse-image 18361984 is_animated_gif=I'm 27 and my stepmom is 26. My dad (54) brought her over from the Philippines and they've been married for almost 2 years now.
It was definitely different at first, though I didn't have much room to talk considering I've known a couple older gentlemen in a very biblical sense. I was most worried about my dad getting hurt or taken advantage of. They just didn't seem to have much in common other than they both like to watch 90-day fiancé.
Now that the newness has worn off I can see my dad was very lonely and needed companionship. My auntie-mama is a lovely young woman who grew up on a poor island with about 15 families on it. She laughs when people call it paradise because she says it's very hot and there is nothing to do (electricity there is only from 5pm-10pm). So I see their marriage as more of an arrangement to better both their situations. They may not be madly in love but I can tell they care for each other.
30 and 55
[rebelmouse-image 18348044 is_animated_gif=So my brother-in-law is 30, and his wife is 55. She has 7 children from 4 previous marriages/relationships. Three of her seven are over 30 years old. The look on their faces when they saw my brother-in-law at the wedding was something to behold.
Grandpa's Wife
[rebelmouse-image 18361985 is_animated_gif=After my mom and her 2 sisters had graduated from high school my grandparents got divorced. A few years later my grandpa married one of my aunt's friends from high school. According to my mom, it was a real big deal that had a lot of people talking and pissed off. My aunts all hated her instantly, and one of them even did the old "put sugar in the gas tank" thing. Oddly enough as it may seem, my grandpa is still married to her, and my step grandma is a pretty cool person. Everyone seems to get along now. Unfortunately my grandpa has dementia pretty bad right now, and my step grandma is pretty diligent about caring for him so I have a lot of respect for her.
1 Year
[rebelmouse-image 18361986 is_animated_gif=My dad is married to a 25 yr old waitress. I am 26. When I was 18/19, me and my family used to go to the place she waited at and every time I would silently pray we were going to be seated in her section (because I had a huge crush.) My dad would always be a dad and drop some dad jokes, waitress style. I always thought she was laughing at these jokes to be polite; turns out she thought they were genuinely funny. They got together 5 yrs ago. He still goes to the same place to eat, and she's still his waitress... the jokes are worse now though.
7 Years
[rebelmouse-image 18361987 is_animated_gif=My dad married a woman 7 years younger than I am. They have a 35+ age difference. Their daughter is now two years older than my son. They live in the country where I was born and I've only met her 2x.
2 Years
[rebelmouse-image 18361988 is_animated_gif=My dad married someone who is not much older than me, she is younger than my brother. When they got married, she was 30, my brother was 32. My parents were married for 30 years, but no one was happier than my brother and I when they got divorced. I didn't care about the age difference, my dad seemed to be happy. I didn't really like her as a person, she's selfish, demanding, and generally just a whiner. One time she was visiting my husband, son, and I and she locked herself in the guest room, because she thought I hated her for trying to replace my mom. I tried harder to be nice to her after that, even if I didn't want to.
These days, they are separated, about to be divorced. My dad is in his 70s now, she's in her late 40s.
Uncle's Girlfriend
[rebelmouse-image 18361989 is_animated_gif=For about a year when I was 18 and my sister was 20, my 50 year old uncle started dating a 19 year old.
I will never forget when she was driving me and my cousins to a concert and she treated all of us including me like children. I at one point had to say "I've dated women older than you, please stop referring to me as a child."
3 Years
[rebelmouse-image 18352477 is_animated_gif=I have a friend who is barely 20, and dating a 46 year old man. He has two sons, aged 20 and 23. They didn't take the news of him dating a girl younger than them well, and have apparently cut off complete contact with him now things have gotten serious. His ex wife thinks it's hilarious, They all think he's having a midlife crisis and think she's a gold digger.
Marriage of Convenience
[rebelmouse-image 18361990 is_animated_gif=My step-grandmother is a fifty-year-old biker chick, covered in tattoos, seven years younger than my mother.
My grandmother committed suicide in 2009, leaving my socially inept and cantankerous grandfather behind. He moved to a retirement community, where he's gotten in some trouble for shooting a fawn from his front porch with a shotgun.
A few years after my grandmother's death, he started proposing marriage to his housekeeper. He didn't want her to live with him. Just wanted to pass on his pension from working in the police department; only a spouse could inherit it, not children.
It took her many years, but eventually she accepted. No wedding. They're not really "together." But now my step-grandmother's younger than my mother.
10 Years
[rebelmouse-image 18352479 is_animated_gif=I'm 35 and my dad's wife is 25. I now have a little sister that is 6.5 years younger than my son (he is 10). I always considered my dad an "old" dad when I was younger, always much older than my peers' fathers anyways, but now he is in his 70's and constantly tired from toddler antics.
Honestly, I love his new wife. She was not the one who broke up my parent's marriage, and is the sweetest person ever. She actively plays and interacts with my son, and would help with anything that I asked. She is genuine and kind. My mom feels the same way, and often has both my father and his wife join us for holidays. My Mom never begrudged my father's current wife, but it probably took around 10 years for her to have an amicable relationship with my dad. Honestly, I think she feels sorry for his current wife. Mom wants us to have a relationship with our new sister and does everything she can to foster that.
Close Bond
[rebelmouse-image 18352485 is_animated_gif=My mother is the young step-mother in this situation. My mom was my dad's third wife, and my older-half sister is only two years younger than my mom. While my parents were married, my mom and half-sister were best friends. It somehow helped that they were close in age and my half-sister liked my mom better than our dad. When they had kids at the same time, it strengthened their bond more.
Now I'm close with my niece, who is older than me. She looks more like my full-siblings than I do. My full-sister and niece look like twins.
And there are just as many grievances for which we are not at all sorry.
Curious to hear about people's track record of their questionable behavior, Redditor NanoPKx asked:
"What is something bad you have done with no regrets?"
Is it petty theft or flat out stealing? You decide.
The Parting Gift
"'Forgetting' to bring back a company ipad after they forgot about me having it. Actually they never asked for it back so I still have it and use it."
– Koetjeka
Furry Companion
"I stole a barn kitten while delivering packages for FedEx. He kept climbing my legs and getting into the van, sitting under the wheel when I tried to back out (it was a steep driveway, no way to swing the van around). I called the number on the package, looked the name up on facebook, called the local non-emergency to get contact info, all failed."
"So I took him. Now, if you're not from a rural environment, you might not understand that barn cats like that are 'no-man's-cats.' For all the owners know, he got sick or got got by a coyote. And he would have died, because when we got him to the vet he had a nasty upper resp infection and some other nasties."
"Now, one deformed nasal passage and the cutest snore later, we have a bonkers little orange cat with the heaviest penchant for snuggling I've ever seen (his name is Monty btw)."
"Edit: I forgot to pay my Cat Tax: https://imgur.com/a/HIXS4us"
"Edit Part 2: Monty loves the attention. Thank you for loving him as much as we do :3"
"MmmmMMMMRrrrrrrrrrrAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW" -Montgomerey Valentine, 2022
– SonOfSkinDealer
The Dirty Treat
"A housemate of mine kept eating mine and my girlfriends food and even though I asked him to stop the only thing he would ever say is 'I thought it was mine' then keep eating it."
"Well I bought my girlfriend some ice cream she really enjoys and she put the half she didn’t finish back in the freezer. Well when she want to get the rest it was gone and it made me madder than I think it probably should have."
"The very next time I saw him and somehow keeping a straight apologetic face I told him how he accidentally ate our sex ice cream and that bits of it had been on our parts etc. I told him I felt guilty not to tell him and that I had to apologise for him to eat such a thing."
"I will never forget the face he made when I told him. A face of pure self disgust and shock to which all he had to say was 'I wish you never told me that' and proceeded to move out around a month later."
"Although he didn’t actually eat sex ice cream, like why the f'k would you put it back after use anyway? Sometimes I wonder if I went to far but in that moment I just did not care at all. He still doesn’t know it isn’t true and I’ll probably never see him again."
"F'k you Vitas buy your own food."
– SpicyDolphin74
Vengeance is sweet.
Payback Time
"A drunk driver hit my parked car, left a huge dent in the front driver’s side door, and then drove away. I happened to be looking out the window at the time and saw the whole thing, including his plate number. Cops got there not long after and took my statement. After a couple days and a couple phone calls, I found out nothing was going to come of it because he was the son of the sheriff the next county over."
"Fast forward a couple months, I see his car parked behind a local bar within walking distance of my apartment. I got out my hunting knife and sliced all four of his tires, and made a couple trips around it destroying the paint job. Yellow Pontiac Sunfire, and I still remember the goddamn plate number even after almost 20 years."
– IgnoreMe304
For The People
"I was a GM for a retailer that was going out of business. During the liquidation I let my employees that worked until the end store product they wanted to buy in a closet I claimed I didn't have a key to. Oh the final days I sold them all the items they requested for 95% off. 70" tvs, ipads, gaming laptops whatever they requested."
– Midnights606
Surreptitious Swap
"Years ago I worked for a wealthy dude who was married to someone semi-famous. He would waltz in every morning and talk about the fantastic dinner he had the night before, how he hung out with some other famous person or whatever else."
"He paid me peanuts. I had a hard time making ends meet."
"I was the office assistant and IT guy. So it comes time to get a new computer for one of the designers. I spec something out, and show it to him. It was a ripper of a machine for the time (early 2000s). But it wasn’t expensive enough for bossman."
"So I added a really high end graphics card. Boss was happy then. The card added nothing for the designer: they only did illustrator and photoshop."
"So I came in that weekend and swapped the graphics card for my aging one from home."
"No one ever knew. Or cared. And I got a new graphics card."
– Dudeinairport
When times are tough, people had to do what it took to survive.
T.P. Crisis
"In college I was so poor I would steal toilet paper from the supply closet in our major building."
– Business_Loquat5658
Hungry College Buddy
"I stood watch for a college friend who was going hungry because he’d been disowned and his roommates had made living with him intolerable after he came out."
"I was loosely affiliated with an off campus program with local churches that gave free student dinners on Thursdays. We would go to church to eat, then bring dishes into the kitchen."
"Anyway, he would go in there and steal stuff like peanut butter, literal bread (not an allegory), granola bars etc. while I watched out for the pastor."
"Eventually we both got caught, the pastor for the college students got a bit mad because he was responsible for us while we were there to eat. And I think it was offensive on some level to steal from church. But then he saw what my friend was taking, and asked him if he had enough to eat. My friend shamefacedly said no, not usually."
“'Okay, fine. Put the food back, and come with me.' Took my friend grocery shopping instead, got him connected with the food pantry and community garden at church instead."
– SchnarchendeSchwein
Based on these examples, people didn't twice about their actions in the heat of the moment.
Within reason, we all gotta somehow get by.
But do you think their actions deserve punishment?
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When a person sees someone they care about going through a struggle or crisis, their instinct is to uplift them with positive advice.
But sometimes, the wisdom imparted by friends isn't always helpful or relevant to the situation.
Curious to hear from strangers online who could do without specific knowledge, Redditor Saibotnl1 asked:
"What life advice can just f'k off?"

These Redditors have a problem with how certain people have on outlook on life.
Time To Rest
"Sleep when you’re dead."
"Cool, but you’re going to be dead a lot sooner."
– Tag2graff
Irrelevant Sadness
"People have it so much worse than you so don’t be sad!"
– notrachelmar
"To that I like to say, 'people have it so much better than you so don't be happy!'"
– ___jupiter____
Your Life Path
"Almost anything relating to what age you must be in order to buy a house, have children, marry, have a profession, or do anything else. Seriously, everyone's life is different from everyone else's. Make your life the way you want it to be. If you so desire. Up to you."
– Frn071
On The Contrary
“Cheaters never prosper”
"Yes, they f'king do."
– waqasnaseem07
People can get out of any situation they find displeasing.
But others feel people should just "stick it out."
Ignoring Bullies
"Just ignore bullys or get someone else to handle it for you. I have never seen this work, only makes it worse. The only effective way I've seen to deal with them is by not making yourself an easy target and make them scared to f'k with you again. If going psycho on their a** is the only thing they'll respond to that's their fault. Also want to add in schools they will punish you for self defense but that punishment is only sitting around a few hours in detention or sitting around at home with a suspension. The punishment is temporary boredom, it's absolutely nothing compared to being bullied and when it's over the important message will still stand that you will not tolerate being a victim."
– User Delted
Remain to be Miserable
"Stick it out"
"Whether that's sh**ty jobs, shi**y relationships, shi**y living situations..."
"By all means don't just give up on things when you face challenges, but if something feels wrong or is wrecking your peace then take some control and change it if you can!"
– petitezoey
"Easy for you to say," might be an auto-response to these suggestions for many people.
Invitation For Recklesslessness
"Live like everyday was your last"
Yall know what people do when they learn they have a single day left to live?"
– LimeGrass619
A Possible Consequence
"I did that as a teenager and ended up homeless and addicted to heroin. Didn’t pan out for me too well."
"19 years sober though today."
– Open-Section-7263
A Practical Approach
"If I knew with certainty that I had one day left, I'd double-check all my financials, my will, and my insurance policies, make sure my wife had all of my passwords and knew where all the money was, spend the rest of the day with her and the kids, then call the medical examiner and ask to lie down on the gurney so that when I die they won't strain their back moving my remains out of my house."
– Asteriad
Nose Stuck In A Book
"Work while they sleep. Study while they party"
"That's not a recipe for success, that's a recipe for a lot of white hairs, burnout syndrome and a stroke before your 40s..."
– Khomuna
Doesn't Apply To Everyone
"Do what you love and money will follow"
"I love walking my dogs and grilling food for my friends but That sh*t doesn't pay the bills as well as my engineering degree!"
– Elons_android
While people's intentions are good, they're better off keeping their two cents in their own pockets.
Not everyone likes to hear platitudes.
Sometimes, people just want to know they're not alone with their problems over listening to unlikely solutions that are nothing more than superficial pick-me-ups.
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Kids start going to school from the age of five, and for the most part, they spend more time at school than at home. Because of that, teachers can become very important figures in the lives of their students.
Some students don't have the best home lives. Some keep it to themselves, but others confide in their teachers.
Curious about various situations, Redditor Delicious_Mastodon83 asked:
"teachers of reddit what is the saddest thing you found out about a student?"
In Need of Parents
"Not a teacher but was a school-based therapist. Had a student (7 -8 y/o) I didn’t know knock on my office door and ask if I’d adopt her and “if you have room, my brother too, but if not, that’s ok, we can be split up. We’re split up now. And I don’t take up space. I just need a sleeping bag”. Broke my heart."
– secretkpr
Heartbreaking, But Industrious
"My mom taught at a school in a bad neighborhood in Chicago in the mid 90’s. There was a second grader that would save his milk and ketchup packers from lunch for his mom so she had something to eat when she got home from work."
– PowerstrokeMe
Big-Hearted Mom
"Not a teacher but a parent with a 9 year old son. Every day I pack extra in my sons lunch because he tells me he has a friend that never has anything to eat. It's winter and my son came home and told me his friend was turning up with shorts and shirt and holes in his shoes. So I sent in a jumper and long pants for him to wear and some slightly used but good condition shoes. I have been up to the school recently and the teacher pulled me aside and thanked me profusely for helping this child. Apparently teachers are not allowed to aid kids they teach here in Australia and they have already reported the issue 3 times to child welfare without results so I was the only one helping this child. The teacher told me before I started sending in more food and clothes, this child would steal others food from their lunches and look through the bins because he was so hungry. They doubt he gets fed at home. So now I make sure to always send an extra lunch and some school clothes/supplies when I can. I can only hope child welfare eventually does something but it breaks my heart."
– spetzie55
Amazing Big Sister
"It was right after winter break and before class started I was just talking with some students and asked if they got anything fun for the holidays. One girl said on no, I don’t ever get presents, my mom is a drug addict. But I went out and got some stuff for my little sister so that she can have a real Christmas."
"She just said it so matter-of-fact. She was so used to being the parent to her little sister that she didn’t even care about her own childhood. It totally broke my heart."
– tonydanzascaulk
The Importance Of Human Affection
"Second hand story from my mom, elementary teacher for 30ish years. She had a hug or a handshake out the door policy, just some small contact and a proper goodbye, and had this young boy who always picked the hug. She wondered why he always went for it, most kids would go back and forth depending on their mood that day, so she asked him why he was always so excited for the end of day hug? His answer, "It's the only one I ever get.""
– needsawholecroissant
Coming Out The Other Side
"Two teenage boys (16/14) with learning disabilities were on my caseload, they never missed school but often ditched class. They were homeless mid-year after they went home from school to find the locks changed, their Mom had abandoned them for a new boyfriend. She didn't leave an address for them to find her."
"*Edit: both eventually dropped out, however a couple of years later the younger brother came back to visit. He and his brother were both working construction, and his brother had gotten married, had a child, and was living with his wife’s family."
"The younger had roommates and was saving for a car. He told me it was a shame I didn’t have kids, because I would make a good Dad."
"People often persevere, even with the odds stacked against them."
– Kursch50
True Parentification
"Not me but my daughter is a teacher, she has lots of stories but one that stands out for me is one of her kindergarten kids saying she was tired and her asking why, the little girl explained that she had been up all night with her mums newborn baby. She did this every night, fed her bottles and everything."
– lb47513343
Luckily, He Was Resilient
"This year I had a 17 year old kid enroll at my school. He was sitting in my math class and I could tell he was struggling. After class I took some extra time to go over a concept with him. I asked him to read the question to me, and he sat there silently. He then looked at me and said “I’m not going to lie to you, I cannot read. I have no idea how to say these words""
"Turned out at age 17 he was illiterate and had been kept out of school by his very religious, controlling parents. Over the past few months he has worked very hard! Now he can finally read at an 8th grade level and he is STILL improving!!"
– User Deleted
A Heroic Teacher
"I worked in an inner city charter school. One of my students (`M10) had a sib (M8) in a lower grade. The mom was there every day in the beginning of the year encouraging them, helping them and generally being very supportive... until a CPS agent spoke to me asking about her behavior. After CPS left things went downhill. The boys showed up late to class even though they lived a half block away from school. When in school both boys were tired from sleeping in the car while their mom "went fishing". She also had two very young girls which she dragged around making the boys take care of them. One day the boys didn't show up and their teacher walked over to the house to find the mom had loaded up the fridge, paid the rent for the month and abandoned them. The teacher (a candidate for sainthood btw) took them in, adopted them and grew them up to be great men."
– mopedarmy
This is really heartbreaking stuff! Luckily, teachers aren't just another adult in your life; they can be your saving grace as well.
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TRIGGER WARNING: This article contains sensitive content about depression and mental health.
As the stigma around mental health lessens (however slowly), people are more forthcoming about the problems they are facing. One of the most common mental health issues is depression.
Depression can affect many different types of people. Factors such as gender, race, nationality, and even age have no bearing on whether someone suffers from depression or not.
According to the World Health Organization (WHO), globally, "...an estimated 3.8% of the population affected, including 5.0% among adults and 5.7% among adults older than 60 years..."
Depression displays in certain patterns, such as mood changes, physical difficulties, and social isolation. However, depression manifests differently in different people and feels different to different people.
Reddit users divulged what depression felt like to them when Redditor iodineseaspray asked:
"What does depression feel like to you?"
Some of this is sure to sound familiar.
The Worst Kind Of Boredom
"Like being more bored than you could imagine but also not wanting to do anything at all, even breathe. So you want to do something, but you can't imagine anything that you would like to do so you're just sort of stuck."
– BuddhistSlater
"So you then spend literally hours staring at a blank wall hating yourself, your life, and everything around you. Well, as much hate as you can summon in the absolutely mentally numb state you find yourself sat in day after day."
– merryman1
Lack Of Motivation and Energy
"Complete lack of motivation."
"Ignoring people that I love, and who are trying to help."
"Just sh*t"
– HatFromStraw
"I feel it extra at work. Letting things slide until you either get into trouble or trying last minute to prevent it."
"Funny those times when I'm working to save my butt, the depression goes away and i feel super focused and motivated."
"I try to carry that energy over but no, it's rinse and repeat."
– ExtraBitterSpecial
Powerful Insecurity
"Insecure about absolutely everything, no hope for the future, dissociation from society and not knowing how to “act” anymore, feeling like I’m not as good at the things I always thought I was good at or that the “talent is wasted on me”, only food cheers me up and sometimes even that doesn’t work"
– tenamonth
Loss Of Creativity
"This. It's like some numb fuzziness you feel in your brain. It's the worst thing ever for an artist who just wants to create but your brain comes up dry with a dense fog that wants to just lie down for a few hours"
– FinnProtoyeen
A Mental Inability To Breathe
"For me, it feels like I’m in a lake with a ball chain tied to my feet, desperately swimming up for air, the only problem is the chain isn’t long enough. I can only get an inch of my head out of the water to breath, and as soon as a high tide comes, the water just floods over me and I feel like I can’t breath again. I live like this, constantly feeling like I’m struggling to breathe, weighed down by my own mind. It’s a struggle and I can’t really describe it in any other way, I’m jealous of people who don’t worry about depression"
– DrowningInBrokeness
"Like suffocating under a heavy cloak"
– kmartfreak
"Like being crushed. Like if the air was crushing my muscles and bones and I can’t breathe because I’m being crushed…"
"Kinda like that."
– Afreshnewsketckbook
Listlessness
"Scrolling thru your steam library. Thinking you want to play something, either not settling on anything or not wanting to put the effort into the game. Going back to the scrolling."
– Aistadar
"It feels like you're forced to play a game of Monopoly (represents life) and your just rolling the dice to appease everyone but you genuinely don't care about where you go, where you land, what you pick up, what you pay, what you gain."
"You kind of just watch it happen without interest and while people are cheering or oh no-ing for you, you genuinely don't care. Everyone is a piece on this board that hardly matters and you feel like we're all just running in a circle over and over again and it's boring and disinteresting as hell."
"You lose all curiosity for everything and just let everything happen and pass by you. No motivation, hardly any love, hardly any care. Feels like the world is in black and white and your waiting for the game to end became it's so absolutely boring and disinteresting, but it never does."
"You come to resent the game and eventually hate it because it feels like you're being forced to play it and suffer it's consequences when you never asked to play it in the first place."
"That's what depression felt like for me. Since then I've been medicated and recieved therapy. I'm doing a lot better now and I don't feel this way anymore, thankfully."
- KnlghtLlghts
A Relation To Fantasy
"You know that scene in the Lord of the Rings where Bilbo is describing to Galndalf what having the Ring all those years felt like? "I feel thin. Like too much jam spread over too much bread." That's honestly the best way I've seen to describe it."
– Electrical_Age_336
"I always say the closest thing to compare it to is a dementor in harry potter. It sucks every ounce of happiness out of you until there is only darkness left."
"Side note: chocolate always helps"
– sunfacer
Fear Of Lack Of Justification
"Like someone close to you died yesterday. Expect no one has, and nothing has happened to justify how you feel."
– AlterEdward
A Physical Pain
"Physical pain in my heart, will start crying just by attending to the physical sensation in my body."
– sagieday
Help Yourself
"I've always described it as having a shadow fixed to your brain which fuels things like indecision and negativity. You can do things to temporarily help but you can't truly shift it. Previous normality is forgotten. But it's amazing how much you can mask it."
"I found I didn't realise how bad I was until I started to get better"
"For anyone suffering with depression. Please, please speak to someone. Best thing I ever did"
– DavosLostFingers
Depression isn't something you can just deal with or get over. Learning to cope is not easy. However, as Redditor DavosLostFingers pointed out, talking to someone can literally save your life.
If you or anyone you know is struggling with depression, contact the American Psychological Association by phone at 800.374.2721 or 202.336.5500.
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