It is really easy to be a decent human being. Nobody is asking anyone to be a super hero or do something life threatening. It takes only seconds to be kind. So try it... please. With the state of the world today, every possible gesture, big, small, grandiose.... microscopic could change a life. Be the change, spread some joy. It will help others but it will mostly help oneself.
Redditor u/Self_World_Future wanted everyone to share about which actions that often seem to go unnoticed are truly the greatest gifts by asking.... What is an underrated thoughtful gesture?For the Memory
mockumentary hug GIF by EvoFilmsUK
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Visiting someone with Alzheimers. You will leave with a broken heart and in 20 minutes they won't remember that you were there. But during your visit they will hopefully feel loved or at least know someone cares.
You First
Letting someone with minimal items cut in front of you at the grocery checkout.
This guy let me (man did he damn insist) go in front of him. I forget what I had but it was only one item. I had brought what I thought was enough change but I ended up being like a quarter or two short. It was awkward as hell when I walked away without the item I wished to purchase. I looked at the guy like, "sorry I wasted your time, but I could have waited." I mean I came back after I got some more change from my car, but he doesn't know that.
Getting Home
If you are driving someone home. At night, wait for them to get to the door, unlock and enter before you leave.
My dad was a little league coach so it was pretty normal for him to give rides to players to get to the game and drop them off afterwards. After dropping off the last passenger, I asked why we weren't going home yet. And my parents explained to me they want to make sure they're able to get into their house.
I hope you trip....
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Waiting for the friend that is tying their shoelaces.
PEOPLE THAT KEEP WALKING WHILE THEIR FRIEND IS TYING THEIR SHOELACES ARE RUUUUDDEEE!!!!!!!!! AND I WILL DIE ON THAT HILL!
Walk About....
If you're in a group walking and someone's falling behind (carrying something, have to tie their shoe, just a slower walker/has shorter legs etc), at least one person waiting for them to catch up. Doesn't have to be everyone, but just one person, maybe two, waiting for them to finish what they're doing or to catch up a bit.
Both my best friend and my S/O have done this for me at varying points in our relationships, and every time they do it it makes me want to cry bc it shows they care and don't want me to feel left out even though I've got these short little freaking corgi legs and they're all walking at the speed of sound.
Trashed.
When someone you're hanging out with throws away your trash or takes your dishes when you're done eating. Not that I expect that all the time, but I find it sweet when it happens. Like if you're sitting down at a fast food restaurant and your friend grabs your trash and throws it away with theirs.
Oh Brad....
Remembering little things. The other day I was talking to a friend and told him I just found out my sister is pregnant and he said "oh, the one who's married to Brad?". It was just nice that he makes a point to remember details that don't necessarily mean anything to him.
Reach Out
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Texting a friend just to see how they are doing. It's always nice to have someone reach out vs feeling like you are the person reaching out all the time.
People Matter
Saying Hi to the security guard.
Yeah. One time years ago, I had to go to the office on a weekend to pick up something I forgot at my desk. Unfortunately there was some fair or parade going on so the parking lot was completely packed and I had to park several blocks away. The security guard who I always said hi to noticed me coming in and when I was leaving, offered to drive me to my car since it was getting dark and he figured I had to have walked a good distance away.
I Hear You.
everybody loves raymond listening GIF by HULU
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Really listening when people speak and not just waiting for your turn to talk.
Just Cross....
When a car stops to let me cross the street, thereby forcing the other oncoming car to also recognize that I need to cross.
There is a busy road I have to cross daily and I'm so grateful every single time that the cars stop for me to cross. It's just a simple gesture of feeling recognized.
To make the pedestrian feel more comfortable while they cross I always pull out my phone and watch a video while revving the engine and creeping into the crosswalk a bit.
The phone and video shows them that my eyes are focusing on something other than them and the revving and creeping shows I can't hear them as well. Most pedestrians are excitedly yelling at me for what I assume is praise for helping them cross and not staring at them.
being kind....
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Giving a compliment. E.g you look nice today.
Yep, and to break it down even further. Give a compliment regarding something within that person's control. That way you're acknowledging something they've proactively done in their life and at the same time positively reinforcing the behavior.
The Dishes
Today's been a rough one and my aunt just cleaned the kitchen for me so that is one thing that i very much appreciate. Little things that most people think of as just part of someone's day can really make a big difference to that person.
Once when I was really depressed and I hadn't done my dishes in so long that they were starting to create their own ecosystem two of my friends came over and washed everything. I will never forget it and I'm still always looking for chances to pay them back.
Obviously.... don't be vulgar.
If you think something good about a stranger, (like if you admire their hair or makeup) that you should politely compliment them. Obviously don't be vulgar.
Last year at pride my husband and I got drunk and we're yelling out compliments to strangers. We were sitting at a Y near a walk way so people could just use the other path if they were shy. But we got so many drinks bought for us and took sooo many pictures with people and so many hugs. It was honestly super fun and I'm gonna do it again when our plague is over.
Simplicity....
A thank you card.
This is the most under rated comment here. One of my projects for students was to have them send a thank you card to someone who did something for them. Later I would ask for feedback and found it interesting they were often amazed at how much it meant. I basically told them one of the best investments they could make in life was to buy a pack of thank you cards at the dollar store.
And I am?
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Saying a person's name when addressing them.
This actually creeps me out unless I know the other person really well and like them.
Snapshot
I cannot possibly stress this enough.
Take candid pictures of a mother with her children.
Or frankly ANYONE with their children... or grandchildren... or friends... doing something other than posing in front of a fireplace at Christmas. You really have no idea how much I treasure the rare glimpses of me interacting with my kids when smiles aren't forced. Take them, send them, they want them. You don't have to ask... just... do it. (So long as you, ya know... know them and what not).
Roses are Red....
Non expensive flowers for occasions. Im talking $10 daisy arrangement for your coworkers last day, or just because to a friend, I always bring wine and flowers as a host/hostess gift. There are so many cool flowers (not just roses!!)
And it can be for a male or female. The kings in your life deserve flowers as much as grandma. Tell him those sunflowers reminded you of his smile, tell Bertha from accounting you appreciate the prompt Thursday afternoon checks. Tell Gamgam she's your favorite and leave a little sunshine in your wake.
The Helper
- Asking if a person got home okay.
- Carrying groceries, bags or heavy items for an older person or family member. lukemscar
First one absolutely; second one ask first, so they don't think you're trying to steal their groceries! Don't want to stress out gram & gramps.
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***WARNING: THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS SENSITIVE MATERIAL. PROCEED WITH CAUTION!***
I can't think of anything hilarious at the moment. Make us LOL.
Lady
Shocked Oh No GIF by Yêu LuGiphy"I have this friend, love him to bits, but his wife has a tendency of just constantly showing everyone pictures of their son at every social event. At the start it was understandable, but now I'm just like 'Lady, it's been two years; they're not going to find him.'"
UnoriginalUse
at 9am...
"Not the most morbid but I love Anthony Jeselnik’s story about his neighbor who has Alzheimer’s. 'One of my next door neighbors is a 90 year old man suffering from Alzheimer’s. And every single morning at 9am he knocks on my door and asks me if I have seen his wife.'"
"'Which means that every single morning at 9am I have to explain to a 90 year old man suffering from Alzheimer’s that his wife has been dead for quite some time. Now I’ve thought about moving. I have thought about just not answering my door in the morning. But to be honest, it’s worth it… just to see the smile on his face.”
dreagan021
Comedy?
"Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is."
GW2RNGR
"Why can't orphans play tennis? They get confused when they hear love."
JayDub506
People who make comedy are evil. LOL.
The Darkness
That 70S Show Reaction GIF by LaffGiphy"Dark humor is like food; not everyone gets it."
storm_the_castle
God Laughs?
"A Holocaust survivor dies and goes to heaven, where she meets God. To break the tension she tells God a joke about the Holocaust, but God doesn’t laugh. The lady shrugs and says 'I guess you had to be there.'"
“'I guess you had to be there' is a common expression used when someone doesn’t laugh at a joke. It means that the comedy may not translate without the context of the situation."
"In this case the Holocaust survivor is saying it, meaning that during the Holocaust God was nowhere to be found. It’s not really a joke about the Holocaust, but the absurdity of belief in a benevolent God. Hilarious right?"
semimillennial
Oh Baby
"How many dead babies does it take to fix a light bulb? More than 3 cause my garage is still dark."
sirnibs3
I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Because I don't know what it says about us as people if we laugh. Oye.
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Curious to hear from strangers online, Redditor Liam_Tang asked:
"People who've divorced, aside from adultery, what were the irreconcilable differences that ended the marriage?"
You think you know a person when you walk down the aisle.
These Redditors were in for a rude awakening.
Pet Neglect
"My wife divorced her ex for many reasons, but the final straw was when she went out of town for a few days, and when she got back he had not fed or given water to the dog. The dog lived a long and happy life after that."
– StrangeCrimes
Obsessed With A Crush
"Not me, but I had an old coworker that divorced his wife for spending their entire savings on candy crush and games of the same type."
– Hexis40
Compatibility Musts
"ITT: Intimacy (sex/romance), beliefs (religion/spirituality/politics), kids, and I haven’t seen it yet but it’s coming: finances."
"The big four. You REALLY need to discuss these things in detail BEFORE getting married."
– rabbiskittles
Physical violence is a legit reason for people to peace out of a relationship.
The Flattening
"She threatened to hit me with a hammer."
– michaelrohansmith
Hitting The Bottle
"She became an abusive alcoholic. It was sad but I had to get out."
– diegojones4
Emotional pain is too damaging to recover from.
Truth Hurts
"She told me as we stood in front of the judge ending our 7 year marriage, 'I never loved you, I just wanted kids.'"
– Pinch_Dogs
Can't Fix Angry
"She was beautiful/smart but an angry angry person. I thought I could be sweet to her and 'fix' that. Heh. She kicked the crap out of me emotionally. Wife II has been a walk in the roses for 32 years now :)"
– lowlandr
A change of heart is worthless if comes too late.
"We Could've Had A Nice Marriage
"He could not understand that my wants and needs were as important as his wants and needs. We tried to make it work for 7 years. During that time, for things that were really important to me, I tried explaining logically, asking nicely, begging, crying, yelling, passive aggressiveness... cycled back through all of these options multiple times."
"(If I knew something was important to him, I would do that. For example, he was really into sports, so I went to all his events, even though that is not at all my thing.) When I finally threw up my hands and told him it was time to get a divorce, he suddenly panicked and said 'What can I do? Do you want me to do half the chores? I'll do it! Do you want me to get a job? I'll do it! Do you want me to buy you presents for your birthday? I'll do it!'"
"So, in other words, he could have been doing that all along, but just couldn't be bothered. That made me so angry. We could have had a nice marriage that we both enjoyed, but no, by the time he saw the light, that ship had sailed."
"We are both happily remarried now (to different people) and I joke that his new wife owes me a thank you note. It was his experience with me that taught him to listen to her and take her needs seriously."
– Bluebird-True
"What Can I Do?"
"My ex was exactly like this. I didn't marry him but when I told him let's break up, he went all like, what can I do? Let's get engaged, let's look at houses, etc. Basically all the pre-marriage topics that we should be discussing about after being together for 7 years."
"I got so angry and straight up told him it's too late... I don't need you anymore."
– gudetarako
As much as a couple wants to stay together, unforeseen circumstances can eventually tear people apart.
Very few people can maintain healthy long-distance relationships.
When a new job opportunity takes a significant other away, would you begrudge them for wanting a better position to earn more money? Or is it better for them to reluctantly turn down the opportunity so they could stay with you? Do either scenarios breed resentment?
These were questions I've often asked myself with past relationships, and my answers varied depending on the person I was with.
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