There are things you kind of assume people can't make it into adulthood without understanding.
But you'd be amazed how much those assumptions don't exactly match up with reality.
Redditor The_Sh0w asked:
"What's something you can't believe you had to explain to another adult?"
The privilege of in depth and accurate education isn't something we all have.
Here in the United States it is perfectly legal to teach inaccurate information in schools (we're looking at you anatomy and sexuality classes) and so it's sort of understandable why so many people still think women urinate from their vaginas.
Sorry if you're just now finding out.
We'll give you a minute to process.
Check out some of these other "you totally should have known this" things that people have had to patiently (or not-so-patiently) explain to other adults.
A Female Human and A Male Human
How men and women evolved together. He said evolution can't be real "because what are the chances a female human and male human evolved to match each other?" as though they evolved separately then just met up one day.
I also had to explain we're still evolving.
Scaring Chlamydia Away
That if you want to get rid of an infection (in this case, Chlamydia), it's not enough to just own the antibiotics prescribed to treat it. You have to actually ingest them. You have to put the pills (500mg Azithromycin, 2 tablets, one time dose,) into your mouth and swallow them. You can't, like, threaten the Chlamydia with the pills and frighten it away.
I'm an OB GYN nurse in a clinic- this person was a patient. Plus she was pregnant, which is why I needed her to not have Chlamydia. When I asked "How do you think this works?" I got a blank stare.
Giphy
Not Enough Electricity
Had a coworker once that told us she had to use special calculators, keyboards, etc. because she didn't have enough electricity in her hands. Her response when I told her that wasn't how electricity works was that she had seen an electrician about it.
I just left.
Was she talking about touch screens? She may have got the electrical facts wrong, while correctly noticing that screens don't react to her fingers: https://www.consumerreports.org/cro/news/2015/06/zombie-finger-and-touchscreens/index.htm
Give her a travel-sized bottle of skin moisturizer, and tell her it was recommended by a top electrician.
No, she was talking about an actual physical calculator. She was legitimately an idiot who said dumb things all the time. We only had her because her original department refused to take her back.
AC Power Settings
Thermostats- "You got it! The number is the temperature you want it to be, not power level"
- Dawnalla
Someone Is In There
Toilet doors. That's right, if it says occupied there is someone in there. If it won't open it's locked...because someone is in there. You have to wait outside because yes someone is in there. This was many times throughout the day.
I had the misfortune of having my office across the hall from the customer bathrooms. I would be informed when supplies ran out or there was a problem even though there was a sign to let customer service know. I had one man tell me I have to look in the toilet to know what is wrong with it. No. No I do not.
Contraception Concepts
Client - "I keep getting pregnant and it's not fair, I've already got 3 kids! You [social services, in general] need to help me."
Me - "Well, what contraception are you using?"
Client - "OMFG WTF (etc., etc.) I'm only sleeping with one fella, why the eff do I need contraception? I'm not a dirty slag!"
I had to gently explain that you have to use contraception if you don't want to get pregnant, even if you have just one sexual partner at the time.
- LTLxx
Family Fun With Furniture
Had to explain to my 50 year old father that queen sized beds were not made exclusively for women after he jokingly called me a sissy whilst we were talking about furniture.
My brother-in-law asked me why I wouldn't weld a metal lamp base onto his wooden shelf. After I explained it for him, he proceeded to cite a Minecraft modpack. He is 25 and this was 2 months ago.
- [Reddit]
Fried Or Fertilized
Fertilization of the egg is how pregnancy occurs.
Wife and I were having trouble conceiving for a while. Had some tests done, all was well, it was just a matter of time before it was going to happen (it did). When the mother-in-law asked why my wife isn't pregnant yet, we mentioned eggs and fertilization, and it's just a matter of time.
Her reply was 'If you need eggs just go to the grocery store and get some.'
She legitimately thought that the doctor recommended we both need to eat more eggs to conceive a child. This woman is in her late 50's with some college education. She absolutely should know this.
Giphy
Not A Charger
My friends and I were on vacation and decided to go into a sex shop. Mind you, we were all early to mid thirties. I was looking at range of toys when one of my friend asked which one of them charges Apple iPhone 8? 🤔 Had to explain what they were used for and she pretty soon walked out of the shop.
Five Plus Five Plus Ten Makes Twenty
That the pretty little "5" and "10" on the green bill she had meant 5 dollars and 10 dollars.
She said she had "3 dollars" after counting 2 fives and 1 ten dollar bill.
She was 22 .She had her diploma.
And I don't want to come off as though I'm making fun of her or talking bad about her because she's very sweet. She's kinda like a puppy. She's sweet and easy to love, but don't expect her to do your finances.
- MrR08070
Happy Halloween
To my ex boyfriend earlier this year (he is 26 and I am 25) I had to explain that Halloween is the same date every year. He asked me which day Halloween was this year, I said: "It's on a Thursday"
to which he replied "No what is the date date of it?"
I thought he was kidding until I realized he wasn't.
Cursive
Had to explain to an acquaintance in college that cursing, i.e. vocalizing words that societal groups regard as obscenities, was not the same as cursive, i.e. handwriting stuff where all the letters are getting freaky and loopy and all up in each others' business.
It took me about 5 minutes to fail to explain the difference to him, after which point I felt like cursive him out.
Animals
The definition of "animal".
To explain, this is how they thought things were arranged:
Humans - Humans
Animals - Anything with fur that is not human
Lizards - Uh?
Bugs and Birds - Catch-all for none of the above
They argued with me saying bugs are not animals, they are bugs. They also argued that plants are not living.
- pakidara
Even When You're Not In California
Ok when the bottle of brake cleaner says " known in California to cause cancer " you are not exempt because your not in California.
- Stone057
The Neighbors Fruit
I have to explain to my cousin that you can't take your neighbor's fruit that they planted in front of their house without their consent. I don't know if she is just being greedy or what but what a thing you have to say to 30 yo woman. No wonder she is still single until this day.
- Letsrain
Stars And Stripes
I was in a car with my Father In Law and we drove past an American flag and he said he wondered how many stars were actually on the flag and if they meant something or it was just the way it was designed. Yes, we're both Americans and this was in America.
- rlw0312
Swimming While Pregnant
My best friend was pregnant around 18. I couldn't convince her that it was okay to go swimming because she was concerned the baby would drown. In the end, I told her to just call the doctor so we could go swimming.
Fridge And Freezer
That a fridge and a freezer were two different things with two different purposes. Worked with a guy in a kitchen who honestly thought that both functioned in the same way, kept finding ice cream and such in the fridge and veg etc. in the freezer.
Driving To Hawaii
My mother wouldn't believe that you could not drive to Hawaii. She told me I didn't know, since I had never been to Hawaii. She's a stubborn old broad who won't take criticism and evidently has never seen a map.
Giphy
Pierced Ears
They informed us about STDs in school and they said that we shouldn't use used needles, so a girl asked: "Am I getting AIDS if I pierce both of my ears with the same needle?"
So listen, some of the answers were things that if we squinted really hard we could kind of understand ... kind of.
Nobody really expects you to be an expert in everything.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
- People Share The Things That Look Super Easy But Are Actually ... ›
- People Explain Which Basic Tasks They Never Quite Mastered ... ›
- People Explain Which Everyday Things Have Become ... ›
- Women Explain Which Things Are Impossible To Explain To Men ... ›
- People Describe The Most Basic Thing They've Ever Had To Explain To A Grown Adult - George Takei ›
- Women Explain Which Things Are Impossible To Explain To Men - George Takei ›
The old wives' tales.
They are the stories of legend.
I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.
Where did they originate?
WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!
You don't hear about them as much anymore.
It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.
But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.
Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:
"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"
"Wait an hour to swim after eating."
What a crock!
So many summer hours wasted.
I want revenge for that one.
Say Nothing
Giphy
"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."
LonelyMail5115
"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."
I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Say Something
"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."
Severe_Airport1426
"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."
crappycurtains
"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."
AlbinoShavedGorilla
Body Temps
"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."
chriseo22
"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."
"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."
apocalypticradish
Arms Down
"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."
Fatmouse84
10 Years Actually
Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Giphy
"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."
"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."
Gecko-911
I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.
This tale is haunting.
High/Low
Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace
Giphy
"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."
LeastFormal9366
"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."
IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI
The Cursed
"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."
"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."
SmoreOfBabylon
Stay In
"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."
"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."
worldbound0514
Dreams and Facts
"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."
"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."
mattshonestreddit
"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."
Darthdemented
Cracked
Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office
Giphy
"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."
Choice-Grapefruit-44
"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."
MacyTmcterry
I love my knuckles.
Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
