People Share Their Iconic "We'll Never Speak Of This Again" Moments
The one thing that happened of which never speak again. There are so many. They never stop, either. Who knows when you'll walk in on your dad naked and chugging milk, or farting so loudly your grandmother's funeral is ruined?
dannyjayes1 asked Reddit: What is your "we will never speak of this again" moment?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
40. Daddy and auntie being naughty.
My Divorced dad was playing horseshoes in a league with my Aunt (moms sister). They went together one night when I was about 16. I went to a friends house to sleepover and didn't think any more of it.
Until I got home the next morning and her car was still in the driveway. Innocent and stupid me went into the house expecting my aunt to maybe be crashed on the couch or something.
Then I heard the shower running and thought, weird, maybe she's taking a shower before she leaves.
Then I heard my dads laugh coming from the bathroom with my aunt laughing too. I tip toed out of the house and went right back to my friends house completely flabbergasted by what I just walked in on.
39. This is a marriage made to last.
I had internal bleeding and really low blood pressure. I was in the hospital and instructed to not try to stand or walk since I'd faint. I didn't obey that.
I went to take a piss and my girlfriend saw and chased after me. She caught up just in time to throw herself between me and the floor to prevent me from cracking my head open as I fell back unconscious, peeing all over everything on the way down.
I awoke with her sandwiched between me and the tile floors, lying in a pool of my pee.
And that's actually the moment I realized I should marry that girl.
I did.
But that's not the story I tell when someone asked, "when did you know she was the one?"
Not gonna lie that's the perfect story for I knew she was the one!
Yeah that's a story for the wedding if ever I've heard one.
38. Don't whizz in the fireplace. Or on the electric fence.
I was about 15. Definitely old enough to know better.
I was putting spiders and ice cubes on the super hot wood stove because the Leidenfrost effect was interesting.
I thought it would be funny to do it with piss. It was not funny to do it with piss.
For the uninitiated, what happens is the piss vaporizes and depending on the volume of your bladder, produces a thick and clearly visible dark brown cloud.
If you can imagine the smog line in LA, it looks like that. That cloud hugs the ceiling and hangs down about a foot. It doesn't really move because it's water vapor and it leaves a film on everything it touches.
It smells like....well...like burnt piss, and you can also taste it. The cloud absolutely does not dissipate before your mother gets home from work.
Eating a Hot Pocket with your bits exposed sounds a bit too dangerous for me.
I was sort of a naughty kid anyhow, so she thought I had started a fire with something. In order to avoid a worse punishment I had to take dumbsponsibility. That was the only time I can remember her looking at me with actual hatred.
MrdrBrgrYou just made me burst out laughing.
I don't recall ever learning about the Leidenfrost effect, so I just looked that up and its really cool. Totally explains why you would play with ice cubes on a wood stove.
But what's up with the spiders?spiders and ice cubes
Right, right, classic combo.
37. Scarred.
One faithful night when I was around 12, I woke up and for some reason I was sure I was hella late for school. I threw on some clothes and walked into the kitchen, still half asleep.
What I saw in the kitchen was utterly confusing. My dad was standing there, naked, chugging milk straight from the carton like a madman. I looked at him, but was too tired to be shocked, he on the other hand looked like he had been cought chugging milk by the ghost of Hitler. Then I looked up at the clock.
It was 4 AM. I really didn't understand anything except that I could sleep more at this point, so without a word I just turned around slowly and went back to bed.
The look on his face still haunts me
Edit: I forgot to mention that he never put the carton down. He just stared at me in shock, milk to mouth, until I left. For all I know he stood there chugging milk with all night
I meant fateful, but at this point I'm just going with it
36. Never tell anyone - except Reddit.
When my uncle died we were going through his house to clear it. We found 5-6 cameras and checked them to see if there were any photos of him for his mother as she didn't have many.
Turns out he was into domination and had a large variety of porn quality pictures of himself partaking in his fetish. 60 year old man being dominated by similarly aged males and females. They are seared into my soul.
Myself and my father were checking together and made a pact not to tell anyone else or speak of it again.
I have this fear for when I die. Especially if I die unexpectedly... just burn all my sh*t. Just burn it.
Give me a key to your house and I'll make sure that nobody finds your body
Edit: Porn, that nobody finds your porn
Darn auto-correct
35. Pics or it didn't happen.
A friend accidentally sent me a pic of his junk on Snapchat that was clearly meant for someone else. He excused himself a hundred times.
"Accidentally" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I accidently sent a snap of myself holding my hand over my junk to my then girlfriends best friend... I immediately called my gf and told her what just happend while writing SORRY THAT WAS NOT FOR YOU to the friend. We all laughed about it and i thought we agreed on not talking about it... I was wrong. All her friends know about it.
34. Username leaves me with questions.
I follow a bunch of weird blogs/tags on tumblr and was scrolling through my feed. I would usually alt/tab in 0.1 seconds if I was fapping or whatever but since I wasn't looking at any porn, I didn't bother to hide what I was doing, kept scrolling, then turned round (whilst still scrolling) to see my mum come in my room to put some laundry on a cabinet.
Unbeknownst to me, right as she came in the room, on my screen was a huge picture of an erect horse penis. I have no idea why it was on the blog and I did not intentionally look for it, but it was right there. In the middle of the screen.
33. Oh no, a joint?!
This is my friend's story.
She smoked weed a bit in high school but obviously hid it from her parents. This one time she came downstairs in the morning to find a joint sitting on the kitchen counter.
She knew for sure it wasn't hers and that she wouldn't be stupid enough to leave one out like that. Her mother soon after walked downstairs and started cleaning up around the kitchen.
When she ran into the joint, she paused, locked eyes for a bit with my friend, said "oh uh" and quickly brushed it into her hand and got rid of it. They both pretended it never happened.
She thinks her mom was covering for her dad. Later on she once found a bong in his closet. She always wanted to smoke with him after that but didnt know how to bring it up. Hence the never talked about it again.
32. We've all been there...
Well me and the wife were out on the lake fishing. When all of a sudden I felt the rumbling in my gut. I was about to sh*t my pants. I looked around and noticed we were no where near a dock and there was nobody else on the water.
So I looked my wife in the eye and told her I was sorry and loved her very much. I then proceeded to hang my ass over the side of the boat and had the Hershey squirts.
It was over quite quickly thankfully. My wife passed me a few old receipts from her purse so I could wipe. She told me she still loved me and we kept on fishing.
Edit: I'd like to clarify that we did indeed move to a different part of the lake when I finished. What kind of sicko do you take me for?
Edit the second: my most upvoted comment is about me having diarrhea on a lake. Wtf is wrong with you reddit? Also my wife is insisting that I point out that we'd been married less than a year at that point.
Thats a keeper.
31. Awkward.
Matched with my cousin on Tinder.
I was like "wow she is ho.... O my god that's my cousin!" while swiping. It all happened so fast. Same thing must have happened to her because we matched.
I just messaged her and said we never speak of this, agreed? And she said agreed. And we've never spoken about it. Things are weird around the holidays.
We just kinda make eye contact and then one of us finds a reason to leave the room immediatly to go and talk to other family members who we have not matched with on Tinder.
30. Forgetting this is probably for the best.
I came home from a week at Girl Scout camp at 13, and discovered a tick the size of a thumbtack, attached to a very private place. I had to go to my Mom and get her to help detach it.
When she finished, she told me we didn't ever have to talk about this again if I didn't want to. Her tone made it clear that she certainly didn't want to.
29. I'mma let you finish but...
Not to hijack the camp story but one time at camp there was this really high rope climb activity that we received daily merits for and I was naturally good.
My group was fairly large as I was quite younger and one day while climbing I almost hit the top but ran out of energy. I squirmed my legs up and down grasping at rope when a glorious burst of happy nectar flooded my grub worm for the first time.
It never came to a pinnacle because it was as if that was the baseline experience. I did this everyday until climbing the rope was the least of my worries.
One teacher thought the behavior was odd and asked me why I stopped at the top every time and squirmed around. I said it feels really good. I was instructed to not do that and to not tell anyone. A couple years later I discovered a pool jet..
Wait until you figure out how to use your hands.
28. And now for an innocent mistake.
In middle school my crush's mom and my mom drove the exact same SUV with similar license plates. After school one day I ran up hopped in my mom's car and started talking when she didn't talk back and hadn't left the pick-up line I looked at her.
She was not my mom. I look to my right and my crush is standing outside the car looking at me like I was crazy. I sheepishly got out and ran a few cars back to my real mom.
A few years later I had moved back to the area and was a cashier at a local store. My crush came through the line and recognized me and started to say weren't you that girl who...where I just interrupted with a "yes" handed him his change and quickly started the next customer.
27. People are nasty.
I put my head in my friends horse mask, only to realize it was where he left all of his used 'alone time' tissues. It was a bonding moment. I took 3 showers.
What's wrong with the trash can?
Seriously, I had never heard of keeping soaked tissues/rags/socks just lying around the room in random places before I discovered Reddit and it seems like everyone does it. It's just so nasty.
26. How embarrassing.
Had to stay with a work friend one night as we had a conference in his home town the next day. It was weird enough staying in his spare room, but to top things off he had a fancy modern bathroom with a square toilet... which of course, I blocked in the morning with a turd the size of Mt Fuji.
After 30 mins of fruitless searching for a plunger while the situation went from bad to worse, he knocked on the door and asked if I was okay.
I had to tell him not to come in but to just hand me a plunger and some bleach. Apparently his gf did the same thing the first night she stayed at his place, so at least I'm not alone. To this day I cannot look him in the eye at work.
Edit: ouch my inbox. I get it, everybody poops.
25. Well-played.
When i was 17 a huge photo radar ticket came in for my truck. something like 40km over the speed limit. My mom was furious at me. HOW DARE YOU DRIVE LIKE A MANIAC I RAISED YOU BETTER and all that.
But It turns out I wasn't the driver that day, dad had borrowed it to pick something up. I asked him how much it was worth to him for me to take the fall knowing she'd turn on him with the fury of a angry mama bear. And that's I got myself a new HDTV that year.
I have a really similar story to this haha. My dad took my car to work one day because his car was in the shop getting fixed.
About a month later a red light camera ticket comes in the mail and my dad opens it and sees its my car and starts blaming me for it.
I look at the picture on the ticket and realize it was on a road near where my dad works so i'm like this isn't even me driving thats you going to work and my dad was just like "oh.... welll sh*t"
24. Uh okay weird.
My mum heard me talking to my best friend about the new edition of International club porn magazine that had Geri Halliwell naked in it. I got back from school one day and there was a brown paper bag on the sofa which my mum edged towards me and walked off. 14 year old me was forever grateful. You're the best mum!
23. Raise your hand if you miss middle school.
I was at a pool party in 8th grade, I think I may have been swimming around or sitting weirdly, but I remember a friend of mine told me "Dude I just saw your peen."
Me: "No you didn't"
22. That's love right there.
One time I was taking a poop and feeling very faint. I started getting cold sweats, feeling dizzy and light headed. In a panic I shouted for my wife to come help me.
As she entered the room I proceeded to faint and fall off the toilet and roll my body to side to prevent injury. Mid fall a solid turd torpedoed out of my butt across the floor leaving a trail of poop smear.
When I came to, my wife was standing there in shock, I got up grabbed some toilet paper and picked up my shame and we never spoke of it again.
21. War, man.
Not me but my father's story.
During WWII, my father was a photographer for the 9th Army Air Corps. Most of the time it was ground-based, but occasionally he flew.
During the lead-up to D-Day, he flew multiple missions in a bomber converted to a stereoscopic camera (3D imagery) platform (the bomb bay had been gutted and the camera installed there).
They would overfly France and take pictures until they either ran out of film or the Luftwaffe showed up. To minimize detection they flew alone with the escort fighters circling out over the Channel.
In event of an attack, they'd drop until they were skimming the waves and run for England, passing under the fighters who'd engage the Germans while they fled.
This, of course, didn't have its risks and on more than one occasion they'd be caught too deep into France or the German fighters would get the drop on them and they'd have to man the guns. Crew size meant even the photographers had to man a gun.
So with all that, here's the "let's never speak of this again" moment. They were still at a high altitude One of the guns jammed and the gunner took off his glove and ended up freezing his hand to the metal of the gun.
He's yelling for help and my dad goes over and says, "There's two ways to get your hand off. Either we yank it off and take the skin off your palm, or we use warm liquid. I know of only one source of that..."
"Never tell anybody about this," was said. Dad didn't keep his word, and thus was born the often told story of how my father pissed on a crewmate's hand and the guy thanked him for it.
20. Hot Pockets. Worth the pain.
I got up one night to get some water, and found that my teenage son was in the kitchen getting food. He was behind the kitchen counter, so I could only see him from the waist up.
When he came around the counter into the hall, two things happened simultaneously: He noticed me, and his eyes grew wide in horror; and I saw that he was butt-naked except for a pair of socks.
He starts trying to panic-run backwards on the tile floor (imagine Scooby Doo trying to run but getting stuck in place in a flurry of limbs), but ended up slipping and taking a hard seat on the tile. Worst of all, he dropped his Hot Pocket. I made sure he was ok, then went back to bed and laughed my @ss off.
Years later, we were driving and reminiscing about funny memories. I said, "Do you remember that night--" and he cut me off with, "Yes." I didn't even have to specify which night. We knew, and we were silent.
19. When ya can't even sneak...
In my early teens I used to choke the chicken on the bed all the time. My bed had a loose board on the headboard that would kind of make this clacking sound.
As a naive child, I assumed nobody could hear it. Turns out everybody - my older sisters, my mom, dad, and even my aunt who stayed with us a lot - heard me ALL THE TIME and knew exactly what was going on.
I learned this about 4 years after moving out when we all got together and got drunk one night, and on my way up to the bedroom my drunk-ass mom goes "We don't want to hear that headboard clanking tonight or you're going to be washing those sheets!" Everyone laughed.
I was like "wut" and then thought about it all night. Nobody acknowledged it at breakfast. Good GOD that was awful.
18. Oh the days of magazines...
My father and I had a porn cold war. There has been a tacit agreement never to speak of it, and we haven't.
When I was a teenager, my mother found my porn stash. Both parents confronted me with it when I got home from school. And of course confiscated it. And of course threw it in the bin.
Or so I thought.
Months later, I happened upon my collection, hidden at the bottom of my dad's wardrobe. Hidden. From my mother, clearly.
So I took it back and hid it in my bedroom. What's he going to do? Tell my mother I'd taken the porn he'd hidden from her that he was supposed to have thrown out?
And he found it again. And took it back. And hid it.
This went on for years. And it's never been mentioned.
And it never will be.
17. When you gotta go you gotta go.
My husband and I work at the same small office. We were the first ones in that morning and other employees usually don't show up for another hour or so. There's only one bathroom on our floor as it's a small business.
Anyway, I had just had some habanero spicy thing the day before and I was in for some punishment on this particular morning.
I'm talking doubled over, clutching your stomach, your farts are fire-punishment. I hear a knock on the bathroom door and I assume it's my husband.
"Hang on I'm having the habanero squirts. I'll be out as soon as I can," I groan out between awful spirting sounds. I hear a female voice awkwardly reply, "Oh...okay."
Sorry Stacy for pulling you into my terrible morning...
16. If it had hit someone...
My wife and I were at my cousin's apartment in a big city. They have a balcony on the 40th something floor. We were all outside on the balcony drinking some beers and getting a little drunk.
My wife rests her beer can (thank god it was a can and not a bottle or glass) on the railing of the balcony. I scold her and go to move it when my half drunk and clumsy self knocks it off and we watch in horror as it falls in slow motion 40 stories and hits the ground like a bullet next to a crowd of people. We never mentioned it to anyone.
14. Poor Donny.
When my best friend died, we figured he would have liked a 'sky burial' kind of.
So at the height of the funeral party we released his ashes into heavens with a giant balloon.
After a few meters of flight the string has snapped, and his remains covered the mourning crowd.
Everyone made their best efforts to get very drunk as soon as possible.
We will never speak of this ever.
13. If that snot love, I dunno what is.
The smoking hot guy I met the prior weekend asked me out and, naturally, I said yes. Because I'd just met him, I asked if I could drive, and he said no problem.
On the way to get some grub, we're cruising along with the perfect tunes playing in the car, windows down, on an absolutely beautiful night. He looks over, I look over.... we're both just sparkling, you know? It was one of those "moments" where you want to take a mental snapshot.
Aaaaannnd THEN...... I guess we must have driven through an area of something he was allergic to? Because he sneezed a couple small ones, then with one MASSIVE blow, HONKED a HUUUUUGE wad of SNOT aaaaaallllll over my windshield and dashboard!
But, unbelievably, that's NOT the worst part. Nooooo. He pretended like it DIDN'T HAPPEN, and went about talking, and scooping it up with his HANDS and smearing it ONTO HIS PANTS!
I. Was. BEYOND. Mortified. I was throwing up in my mouth, my eyes were watering, and he didn't want me to pull over to get it cleaned up? We had to go to dinner like that, with SNOTTY PANTS!!
Sigh...... I ended up marrying him. We have NEVER, EVER spoken of it again, not even 40 years later.
Edit: Holy SNOT balls Batman, THIS has blown up! Thanks for all the excellent karma! Wish I could show the hubster the post but.... ya know.... IT'S IN THE VAULT!!!
12. "Just a cramp."
After a house party when I was a teenager me and my friend both passed out on my bed. About 2/3 hours later I woke up with horrendous cramp in my leg so I've sat on the edge of the bed massaging it trying to get rid of it.
My friend woke up and thought I was rubbing one out but got too awkward to ask wtf was going on. He never said anything until the next morning when he was giving me a weird look.
I'd prefer we never speak of it again...he loves twisting the story to any girls on nights out.
11. Gross.
We were at a friends hanging out. He invited a few girls over and one of the guys knew where his "nut rag" was kept. Someone went to the kitchen and used tongs to grab it and show off. The girls asked what it was and we began to just silently sit there thinking of something.
When I was a teenager I got really stoned one day and when I got home I went for a shower. It was only me and my sister in the house. While still incredibly high I got shampoo in my eyes.
In a little panic I slipped and ripped the shower curtain down.. Fell out the bath.. Hit head on radiator and landed with my arm down the toilet.
My sister burst in to see what had made a huge crashing sound, there's me.. naked, wrapped up in a shower curtain on the floor with my arm down the toilet.
12 years later and it's never been brought up.
10. "Wait, you're robbing me?"
My parents had to help me get home after an unfortunate event with a dominatrix in Lithuania where I got robbed while strapped down naked on the bed, she took off and I had to be "rescued" by the Lithuanian police.
9. He wasn't wrong.
15 years old, I wander into the living room in my boxers, hand down the front, enjoying being home alone. President George W. Bush is on TV talking about cloning. With little understanding of what he is talking about, I yell at the top of my lungs, "WE'RE F*CKED!"
When I was home alone and a teenager, I liked to get wacky like this, probably just an outlet of excess energy and my general facade of being a decent kid. Dance around, yell random things, basically if you saw me in private at any point in these years you would have thought I was mentally ill (hell, maybe I am, who can say?)
Unfortunately for me I was not home alone and my mom was in the living room watching this unfold. She yelled at me in shock at my behavior, it was probably top 10 most embarrassed I've ever been in my life, and it was never discussed again.
8. Fail.
Some years ago, the toilet in my kids' bathroom got really clogged. Like impossibly clogged. Nothing, not even one of those toilet snake thingies could unclog it.
It was so bad that I literally took the the toilet bowl apart and removed it from the mounting, determined to see just what the hell clogging it. Finally, after some poking and prodding around, I dislodged a small canister of hairspray - you know those like travel-size versions, about 5 inches high and maybe 1.5 inches in circumference.
Confused ,I asked my son if he knew how that could have gotten in there. He had a horrified look on his face, as if I had dug something up out of a grave. He was about 13 or 14 at the time, so suddenly I had an idea of what was going on. He tried to explain it away as "Oh I was just fooling around and trying to see what I could flush down the toilet, haha," but I knew his @ss was lying.
I totally knew he was trying to stick that thing up his butt and that it fell in. I gave him a look as if to say "I know they truth but I'm not gonna push the matter," and we never spoke of it again. I covered for him when I spoke to my wife and just told her that I think the kids were just fooling around and it fell in.
7. Sibling shenanigans.
I got into a car accident for the first time in my life when my younger brother was visiting me. I wasn't paying attention (dumb) to the car in front of me and I rear-ended them pretty hard.
Luckily no one was hurt, we exchanged information, took pictures, but there was no noticeable damage so we left it at that.
I looked at my brother and we both agreed never to bring it up again. I gave him that car when he turned 18.
6. Awful lotta fuss over a pill...
At school, this kid and I found a pill on the counter, and we chucked it into a urinal full of piss for whatever reason. About an hour later a teacher pulls me out of class asking what I had found in the bathroom.
Apparently this kid told the school I had found a pill, and the school wanted it. I was taken to the office and they were demanding this pill from me, which I just didn't have.
I lied and said I threw it away, and they demanded that I go search the trash for it. I was silently freaking out knowing that if I didn't come back with this pill, I could probably get in serious trouble.
They sent this kid and I to go search the trash, and while in the bathroom we looked at each other and knew what had to be done. I reached into this piss hole, grabbed the partially -dissolved pill, and dried it off with a paper towel.
We told each other that this piss grab will never be spoken about under any circumstance. We gave the pill to the school and they asked why it was kind of dissolved. We told them it was wrapped in a wet paper towel when we threw it away and they believed it.
5. Alleyoops.
When I scored on the wrong hoop in a basketball game when I was 8. My sister unfortunately never signed the non disclosure agreement.
4. No divine intervention.
Many many years ago I went to this Jesus Woodstock festival. Basically a 3 day Christian music fest. We got there after dark. Set up our tents.
I use a wad of tp, toss it into the hole, but it's strangely floating. I realize I fucking pissed on the brand new portapotty with the toilet lid still closed. I felt immediate shame. I had to release my guilt and confided in my bff later that night. She did the same exact f*cking thing.
Had to use the bathroom and ran to the portapotty without flashlights cuz we were 17 and beyond dumb. I pop a squat and am getting a TON of splash back- idk how it's so filled, it's the first night.
3. Good thing it wasn't actual brain surgery.
I was working IT for a hospital and a neurosurgeon had ordered a new lamp for his microscope. It came in through IT instead of engineering for some reason, so it fell to me to drop it off to him. When I did, he asked me to fit it as well. Medical equipment isn't my field, but the instructions were right there on the box, so I did.
Okay, cool. New lamp fitted, I can see it shining through the housing. So why wasn't the PC capturing any image from the microscope? The surgeon didn't know either, it had been like this for weeks. I didn't know microscopes, but I did my best to troubleshoot. Lamp on, check. Comms cord plugged in and seated tightly, check. The PC is receiving a signal, but for some reason it's a completely blank signal.
Neither one of us could figure out the problem, so we called up a medical engineer who took one long look at the microscope from across the room and announced that the lens cap was on. The brain surgeon and me shared a single humiliated glance and silently promised each other never to talk about this moment. A promise I've broken for your enjoyment.
2. A Thanksgiving memory for the ages.
My husband and I were going to Thanksgiving dinner at the house of some of my dad's family that I only kind of knew. We got there, knocked, and a woman I didn't recognize let us in.
We went into the home and there wasn't anyone there, there was no dinner, etc. So we're making small talk with this lady and I ask when everyone is coming. She asks what I mean.
Turns out we were at the wrong house. The woman just thought we were friends of her husband, because he would randomly bring people home, and that we had simply arrived before he did.
1. Same, can't.
Trying to teach my new at the time girlfriend how to drive my manual car. She told me she had done it a few times and knew what she was doing.Fast forward ten minutes and I no longer have a front bumper.
She continues with "I cant believe I did this! You're friends and family are gonna think I'm an idiot!" I just replied with "I did this" and we havnt spoke of it since. Everyone thinks im the idiot
When we feel we have been wronged by someone, we tend to think the worst of them.
Irredeemable.
Evil, even.
But the concept of what is evil depends on the individual and their level of tolerance.
So what is pure evil then?
It's not always about demons. Because the truth is, humans are capable of doing some of the worst things imaginable.
Curious to hear about strangers' experiences with sinister forces around us, Redditor ThatOneDude44444 asked:
"Who do you believe is literally evil?"
Those who prey on the weak and vulnerable are some of the worst kinds of people out there.
The Scammer
"I knew a guy who retired from an investment firm before he was 40. I inquired if I could get a job at the firm. He told me 'if you can look a woman in the eyes, who’s scrubbed floors all her life, and tell her that you can quadruple her life savings by investing in a stock you know is worthless. Then you could work there' I felt sleazy just listening to him. I lost all respect for him. He preyed on poor desperate people, and ruined their lives, so he could retire in his 30s. I found out from a friend that the investment firm was a boiler room fly-by-night scam. Everyone who worked there was taken out in handcuffs."
– GoddamnCabbage
Manipulative System
"Health insurance denying treatments that your doctors have personally recommended."
"Health insurance companies insisting that you try other treatments first, or insisting that you work with in-network doctors who can't be seen for 6-8 months, intentionally delaying your proper treatment. It's f'king murder as far as I'm concerned."
"I could keep listing ways that the health insurance industry is pure evil."
– rachelsnipples
Where Is The Care In Medicare?
"My mother was just diagnosed with a very serious condition that if not treated will make her go blind, her insurance is refusing to pay for her treatment. She’s 73 and will now owe 1500 usd each month so that she doesn’t go blind despite having Medicare. This is our system."
– MamaFuku1
And there are those who are the devil incarnate.
The Moors Murders
"Ian Brady and Myra Hindley. The tape recording of one of their young victims crying for her mum while being tortured is awful. They refused to say where they buried Keith Bennett and that boy's poor mum died without knowing where he was. I hope they are forever being tortured in Hell."
– joacaster
The Torture Mother
"Gertrude Baniszewski, the 'caregiver' of Sylvia Likens. Her story still gives me chills."
– gingeritis90
"I barely made it through that story it was so, so horrendous. And our f'king legal system did barely anything to the heinous b*tch Gertrude and her evil daughter."
– astrongerpeyote
The fact that an individual can be solely responsible for a major national crisis is unthinkable.
But here we are, and several people came forward to share their stories.
Origin Of The Opioid Crisis
"Richard Sackler specifically would be the more correct answer in my opinion. The rest of them are greedy and borderline sociopathic sure, but I think few of them truly understood the ramifications of what Richard was orchestrating. Richard intentionally orchestrated the opioid epidemic and he knew exactly what he was doing and what the outcome would be. He banked the future of his company on creating a legion of opiate addicts that had no idea they were becoming opiate addicts. That is evil."
– aveganrepairs
Victim Speaks Out
"I am a victim of this f'ker. Slipped a disk and was prescribed Oxycontin 2 40mgs a day. Within 6 months I was upped to 80mgs 3 times a day. That's the equivalent of 48 5mg percocet. I'm still struggling and this happened in the late 90s."
– bucklebee1
Time For Commiserating
"I’m so sorry to hear that that happened to you and that the effects are lingering 3ish decades later; that’s a significant period of time/portion of your life."
"I would like to also let you know that I am victim of this f'ker/family, but in the opposite way. I have had 2 discs in my neck collapse, I have had 2 spinal surgeries, I am in intractable pain. And all I can get is Rx ibuprofen or aleve or other NSAIDs that don’t touch the pain and can cause kidney and liver damage at the dosages I’m being prescribed. I’ve gotten to try every treatment EXCEPT opiates: surgeries, injections, lidocaine patches, antidepressants, nerve medication, massage, yoga, acupuncture, physical therapy, prolotherapy, and plasma rich protein treatment. The one time I asked for low dose opiates (like a single 5 mg Percocet as needed - not 48 daily), I was discharged from the pain management practice immediately for 'drug seeking'. And they’re the biggest practice in my state."
"Further, in the intervening time between my 2 surgeries (before I knew I needed the second surgery as my second disc had collapsed), I presented to the ER in intractable pain with physiological indicators like elevated heart rate and blood pressure. Not only was I not given any pain medication at all (not even toradol, an NSAID), I was also urine drug tested and told that even though I had no drugs in my system that I 'didn’t deserve' any medication and was wasting their time when they could be saving someone else’s life."
"We are BOTH victims of the Sackler family and the opiate prescription practices that led to what’s being called the 'opiate epidemic'. I am not trying to invalidate your experience (and I hope that comes through). I am just trying to show people reading these comments my side of the coin too. I see you u/bucklebee1. And I validate you. And I send you nothing but the best."
– caboozaliciousAnyone who is capable of taking another life without even a hint of remorse doesn't deserve the title of being human.
They are purely evil.
And what's terrifying is that we don't really know the capabilities of most people until they snap.
It's a sad truth that just about all women find their bodies objectified or, for better or worse, the unwanted subject of conversation.
One of the many reasons why too many women are self-conscious about their bodies and suffer from sometimes crippling body image issues.
More often than not, women often find themselves most self-conscious about a part of their body or appearance most people will never notice, or even see.
But much to their surprise, sometimes it is that very thing they hate most about themselves that others might find most beautiful about them.
"Men of Reddit, what is something women hate about their bodies that you actually love?"
Aging Gracefully
"Everything that has to do with getting older."
"When my wife and I got married, we were obviously younger and in our 20s."
"Although never thin, I was more slender."
"My wife, 5’9 and legs for days and just banging body."
"Now? "
"I’m not as thin (same as her) we have two kids, and I find her sexier now more than ever."
"In our almost decade together, we have slept on a floor, used change for gas and had our electricity turned off 3-4 times for non payment."
"She’s my Ride or Die."
"She has more of a tummy now, bigger boobs, maybe doesn’t shave like she used to or wear skimpy lingerie outfits randomly."
"BUT."
"I wouldn’t trade it for the world."
"We have grown older together and I honestly couldn’t find anything in this world that still turns me on as the certain way my wife runs her fingers down my back or how she looks naked."
"And it’s because she’s mine."
"Not in a possessive sexist way."
"But in a, I’m the luckiest guy in the world that this beautiful human wants to spend the rest of their life with me (and have sex with me)."
"Hopefully this isn’t too long winded."
"Long story short…..girls spend tons of time worrying about getting older."
"Age isn’t always a detractor."- Ok_Animator_9218
Sometimes being "cheeky' pays off.
"My ex-girlfriend always complained about the size of her cheeks and how she looked like Quico (a character from an old Mexican TV series)."
"For me she looked gorgeous, I loved to kiss and caress her cute round face."- Raul_H2000
Presumably, He's Also One Of The Only People Who Sees Them
"My wife was very self-conscious about her inverted nipples, but I adore them."- nsfbc
Beauty Truly Does Come From Within
"A bit longer than others, but I have a full story to tell which might help someone."
"A few years ago, my lady got a breast cancer."
"We live in a country with high level medical facilities, and the doctor told us at the very first meeting that we were here to heal, no reason to think otherwise."
"But her cancer is genetic."
"It means if she kept her breasts, her risk of having a new cancer would be very high."
"So it's clear for both of us, she got a mastectomy."
"She now has no breast anymore."
"She just has two big scars on the chest."
"On her side, she f*cking hates her body."
"She is scared as hell to wear anything that could reveal her scars."
"She also got some weight during the treatment, and she is pissed at that too."
"But I f*cking love her."
"I choose to love with this woman, and it does not matter if she had lost her breasts, her legs or her face, I will still love her."
"I will fricking love those scars until my dying breath, because, to me, it means she survived."- Vitrebreaker
Glorious Imperfections
"Uneven breasts."
"Adds character and makes paying attention to each one a separate adventure."- Inevitable_Shift1365
"Probably a lot of stuff but something in particular is like minor 'imperfections' or whatever you would call them."
"A woman I used to work with had a thing where it was like her teeth didn't quite line up like normal (I think maybe a mild crossbite) and I found it weirdly attractive."- tasteful_tomfoolery
They're Easier To Appreciate When You Don't Have To Deal With Them Yourself...
"My wife’s boobs."
"She hates them with a passion and I cannot figure out why."
"They are perfect."- Reddit
Androgyny Is A Wonderful Thing
"I love sleepy, set-back bedroom eyes."
"And I love boyish clothes on girls."
"So hot."
"I also like when a woman has a deeper voice."
"God it’s hot."- Slurpydurpy711
You Never Know What Turns Them On...
"I was always very insecure about my hip dips until my boyfriend told me he loved them."
"I was standing in front of him one day and he just said 'I love the way your hips go in a little there, it makes your butt so cute, it's my favorite' and I was shocked, honestly."
"I used to spend hours watching videos about how to exercise them away, creams that would fill them in, and other ridiculous horsesh*t that would never work."
"He's somehow found every insecurity I have and told me how attractive it is before he ever even knew I was insecure."- trash_bin_84
Getting A Little Scientific
"Maybe a little too clinical or intimate for this thread but I really appreciate unique labia and I find it absolutely heartbreaking that there is so much widespread insecurity about this that there are cosmetic surgeries to 'fix' 'imperfect' labia."
"Past girlfriends and flings who had more prominent or 'unconventional' labia were dreadfully insecure about it and some went as far as to be absolutely astounded that I’d compliment them during/after sex because a past partner hated it or was very cruel and callous about it."
"Absolutely gorgeous."
"One of the most pernicious and evil beauty/porn standards out there."
"As long as hygiene is well-accounted for, there’s no such thing as a labia and vulva that are better or worse than any others."
"It’s not ever crossed my mind to compare or critique what’s down there and I always speak out about this when my friends say some stupid or insensitive sh*t."- e-co-terrorist
And Always Handle Them With Love...
"They're called love handles for a reason."- devilthedankdawg
It's very easy to think ill of ourselves, particularly in the judging eyes of others.
But we were given our bodies and appearance for a reason.
And if we embrace all that is unique about us, chances are all others will find that beautiful.
Reaching 50 is a life goal.
Getting to that milestone is something we should all aim for.
So many years, so much life lived.
Which means there is so much story to tell.
Who can't help but look back and advise about how to do it better?
Redditor h-gotfred wanted to hear from the over 50 crowd, so they asked:
"To you Redditors aged 50+, what's something you genuinely believe young people haven't realized yet, but could enrich their lives or positively impact their outlook on life?"
There is so much to know about life.
And we have to age to learn it.
So let's chat...
Be Happy
just married love GIFGiphy"Marriage/relationships should be fun, and happy. Life is hard, things get tough. Find someone that makes the tough times easier, not harder."
Inevitable-Mine6466
"Piggybacking off this and saying, even the happiest marriages get into arguments. It's not a reason to leave."
J3sush8sm3
Battles...
"Not everything that you disagree with deserves an argument. Pick your battles and let trivial things slide."
hail2theKingbabee
"To echo this: Not everyone you disagree with is 'wrong.' They are simply operating with different information. You can disagree with someone on an issue and still value the person. Don't let one issue define your entire relationship with another person."
A_Socratic_Argument
The End
"If you die, your employer will have your job posted before you are buried. Remember that when making work/life choices."
Justin9314
"I started my career at corporate headquarters for a large insurance company. I was doing GREAT, but I just didn’t like the industry. I applied for a job at a major university and someone took a chance on me and gave me the position (transitioning from for-profit to non-profit is notoriously hard)."
"I made less money over the course of my career certainly but I wasn’t on poverty wages by any means. But I remember about 5 years in, one of my old VPs was in town and we got together. His comment was 'We miss you, but you look so much happier, the psychic income is showing.' Insightful guy."
Reynyan
The Truth
"2 things I will be eternally grateful to my grandfather for instilling in me..."
"Failure is not an end state unless it is where you choose to stop. He loved to quote that line by Churchill whenever something didn't work out for me, Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm."
"Honesty is the most powerful tool you can use to define yourself. Admit your mistake, frankly and honestly. The truth always comes out in the end no matter how big or small and it doesn't get better with age. You can give back something you steal, and you can help those you hurt but once they brand you a liar, it's all you will ever be."
iskandar-
Be Quiet
Golden Girls Rose GIF by TV LandGiphy"Unless you don't mind hearing EEEEEEEEEEEE like all the time day and night, use hearing protection in loud situations. Tinnitus is a bi*ch."
revnhoj
Take care of your ears.
One of life's greatest lessons!!!
Live by the Moon
bart simpson maggie GIFGiphy"Wear sunscreen."
nilecrane
"I just had a quick look at my 50-year-old upper chest, frequently exposed to the sun in my youth, and compared it to my 50-year-old belly, which has always been clothed and covered (I have never liked two-piece swimsuits). What a difference!"
HootieRocker59
Passions
"Take a genuine interest in what other people have to say, ask them follow-up questions about their passions in life. Don’t just talk about yourself, or wait for your turn to talk. That’s how you have a conversation, and build a relationship."
MayIServeYouWell
"Sometimes you gotta be careful with that. Pay attention if the other person is doing that too, it's important for you to share about your life. It can be kind of lonely when you know so much about your friends, but they don't know about you."
jacarelunar
Practice makes Perfect
"Every skill takes determined practice to master. I see my young friends/relatives try and give up on so many things because 'they weren't very good at it.' If you keep doing that, you'll never be very good at anything."
EarhornJonesI
"I love cooking - and find it easy and relaxing. I have hit a point where I can make several dishes that I can honestly say are far superior to what I could get at a restaurant. I love delighting my family and friends with what I cook."
"But the truth is - I've prepared thousands of dishes. I've practiced for 40+ years. I have f**ked up every single type of food there is at least once. I've burnt things. I've undercooked chicken. I failed to emulsify things that should have been emulsified. I forgot to set the timer. I've added too much salt. I chopped when I should have torn. I did all of the wrong things at some point. And because of all of these things, I can walk into any kitchen and make something delicious."
NewSummerOrange
63
"I’d say invest in your health by regularly exercising. My wife got me into running when we were in our twenties, and it has been a big part of our lives ever since (I’m 63). Nothing crazy, no marathons, we don’t time ourselves or follow a strict training plan, we just pick a route, go at our own pace, and have fun. We still go 3-4 miles, 3-4x per week."
"I also started working out at the gym 3x a week with free weights in my 30s, and have been doing it ever since. I’m no Schwarzenegger, believe me, but I can still work around the house, move furniture, shovel snow and have fun tossing a ball around with the kids without injuring or exhausting myself. Between aerobic fitness and weights, I’ve been able to stay remarkably healthy my entire adult life, knock on wood. It’s also been great for my mental health and managing stress."
"You don’t have to go nuts and set unreasonably strict requirements for exercise goals or diet that a normal person can’t possibly maintain - just do the best you can, make exercising a few times per week a habit, eat a reasonable diet (avoid fried stuff, eat fruit and veggies, lay off the sweets), and 40 years later you’ll really thank yourself, believe me!"
lanky_planky
Plan Ahead
Make It Rain Money GIF by yvngswagGiphy"Debt can really ruin your life. If you want to take on a lot of it, make sure you have a good plan and run it by a lot of smart people first."
vanityklaw
Debt. Everyone should learn about avoiding debt as early as possible.
This whole list should be taught in Universities.
It's amazing to think how, as times change, so do the quality of products.
But this also includes items that were once considered commonplace that are now seen as vintage or even luxury.
For those who were around at the time when an item was first introduced, it can be surprising to see how the availability of that item changes over time, and even frustrating when it becomes increasingly expensive.
Redditor zombiem00se asked:
"What was normal 20 or 30 years ago, but is considered a luxury now?"
Quality Furniture
"New furniture made out of real wood."
- Juls7243
"It's legit why I started woodworking. Even my s**tty projects that I'm unhappy with are infinitely better than the junk in stores."
- leap3
Software Ownership
"I hate that everything is a subscription now. I miss being able to just straight up buy Microsoft Office. Now you need a subscription."
"There's a hidden way to buy a license, but it has very basic functionality and limited apps, so it's kinda useless."
"Even my printer needs a d**n subscription to use the ink that came with it (which I hadn't realized or I wouldn't have bought it)."
- SolusLega
Income-Rent Ratio
"The days of paying no more than 30% of your income in rent."
- newsaggregateftw
"I lived in poverty housing and this was how they determined our rent. It was 30% of mom's income, regardless of how much she was making."
"That was 20 years ago, not sure what starving kids do today."
- DaughterEarth
Constant Availability
"Not being expected to be reachable 24/7."
- Siukslinis_acc
"Yes, f**k this. I hate being bothered about work when I'm off work. I used to have a boss that expected me to answer when I wasn't at work so he would b***h and moan about it. Then I became known as the one who never answers."
- Capt_Skyhawk
Affordable Concerts
"Concert Ticket prices."
- Quality_Street_1
"Sure does seem like ticket prices went from $50 to $200 really f**king fast."
- 7eregrine
Faithful Cookware
"Household products that didn't break within the first few years of use. My grandma had the same fridge from 1993 for a good while before deciding to switch to a newer, bigger option two years ago. Yes, it broke within those two years. My mom's wedding cookware is still going strong 25 years later, but whenever she needs new pans, they start flaking Teflon into the food within a few months."
- parangolecomuna
Retirement Funds
"Retirement plan built-in to your job."
- SuvenPan
"Or just retiring in general, lol (laughing out loud)."
- Joaham1
Farmer's Markets
"Farmer's markets. You used to be able to go down and get fruit and vegetables cheaper than the grocery store. Now it seems like they charge three times more than stores do."
- jrhawk42
Available Repairs
"Being able to get things repaired instead of buying new."
- einRoboter
Right to Privacy
"Privacy used to be implicit. It was just there. You didn't have to think about it."
"Now it's explicit. You have to seek it out and take steps to ensure it remains in force."
- dsac
The Good Ole Days
"Being left the f**k alone."
"Buying something and just like, owning it."
"Playing a video game without an internet connection."
"Not having to provide your email address for every single f**king thing you do."
- El_Mariachi_Vive
Just Gaming
"I still miss the days of just putting a game in, turning it on and you go right into playing it. The game alone was the sole focus and purpose of the console. The GameCube is the last system I remember playing that had this."
- __M_E_O_W__
Bins of Photo Albums Under the Bed
"Photographs on actual photographic paper. I know it's still possible but oh so rare."
- audiofankk
High-Quality Clothing
"Good quality fabric in clothing. I have clothes from the 90s (and 80s from my mother) that still hold up today. These days, I'm lucky if my shirt isn't saggy and misshapen within a year."
- TheMadLaboratorian
FriYay and TGIF
"Being able to go out every Friday after work and being able to afford it."
- M-the-music-guy
We're always moving forward and looking forward to future advancements, but sometimes, it's nice to look back on where we've been and what we miss about the old days. Sometimes, it may even be a little sad to think of what's not available anymore, but at least we got to experience it.