I have no guilt. So I'll be taking it all to the grave. Unless of course my mind is rattled and I have no control over my senses. But if stay in control, my lips are sealed. Let's hear about the souls who felt the need to purge.
Be Sure
Animated GIFGiphy"I had a client (90 year old male) confess to his wife and children that while he was away on business, he obtained another family."
"He lived another two years. Wife and children kinda cast him off. He thought he was dying immediately of cancer, they were multimillionaires, he tried to spend as much as he could out of spite so his children wouldn't inherit any of it."
"22"
"Took care of a WW2 veteran with dementia. He would say the number "22" over and over and the family never knew the significance of it. The number didn't line up with any significant events or dates that they were aware of. The day before he died his mental state became incredibly clear and he started telling the staff "22 men. I killed 22 men over there." Poor guy. He lived with that anguish for 50+ years."
- Nurse317
He knew this...
"Kind of similar I suppose. I'm a scrub nurse. My job is to assist the surgeon during surgeries. I was preparing an elderly patient for a pretty high risk surgery. There was a good chance he was going to be fine but there was also a decent chance things were going to go south. He knew this."
"While the CRNA is doing her thing getting the anesthesia ready I'm standing next to him going over his chart and signed releases and he says to me, "I need you to tell my wife I'm sorry for all the times I raised my voice at her. There weren't many times. But right now I wish there weren't any." That was the first time I ever got choked up at the bed side. Thank goodness for masks because it helped hide my expression."
"I so badly wanted to tell him everything was going to be okay but no one knew if it was going to be. I said back to him, "I'll do anything you need me to, but right now let's think about some happy memories before you go under." I asked him to tell me about he and his wife's first date. Once he was under I excused myself before scrubbing in to stop myself from crying. He made it through surgery and his wife was waiting for him after being transferred from the PACU."
Speak Spanish...
"Kind of a confession. My grandmother was from Spain. At some point in my life I was like "Why don't I know how to speak Spanish?" So I asked my mom, as I've never heard her speak Spanish either. She said, "My mom came to America and was one of the 'we are in America now, so we speak English now' people."
"When we started pestering her to teach us Spanish, she claimed that she forgot how to speak it. We all kind of thought she was full of crap, but she was adamant about it. She was sharp as a tack until her mid 90s and lived alone. Finally, it was too much and we moved her to our house, and then to assisted living because she wanted to be closer to her friends."
"When she ended up in a nursing home because she was on her last legs, and her mind started to go, we caught her speaking Spanish to the mostly Hispanic staff. Basically, she had to go senile to forget that she told us that she couldn't speak Spanish. It was an unintentional confession that she always knew how to speak Spanish, but she just didn't want to because it wasn't the American thing to do."
- EatATaco
Bye Now...
sad miss you GIF by PBS KIDSGiphy"Just the people who die alone. The next of kin is usually a distant niece or nephew. I hated those calls because I would inform them of the passing and they would just say, "Ok, thank you." And hang up."
Oof. See there? Now is why I say "lips are sealed." What if there is an eleventh hour miracle after I've confessed to some ludicrous sin? How embarrassing. No thank you. Who else spilled some tea?
I hear Toni...
excited toni braxton GIF by Soul TrainGiphy"My Grandfather lived into his 90s. According to my Grandma, his last lucid words the day before he passed was when he called out, "Unpoop my pants!" Not very profound, but very memorable, because that song was popular at the time, so now I always imagine that line sung in Toni Braxton's voice."
Nonna...
"Nurse here. An old lady gave me some questionable advice. She was this 90-something Italian Nonna, all dressed in black skirts and dripping with rosary beads and crucifixes, very Catholic. She told me "to be happy in life, you need 3 men. 1 for the money, 1 for the love, 1 for the boom-boom-boom" (sex). Can't say I agree with her, but it's certainly memorable."
Visiting Hours
"I recently cared for a woman who had multiple acute strokes in a short amount of time. A week before she had been independent, riding her horse every day, still teaching part time at the local school, despite being in her 80s. By the time she got to me she was completely nonverbal, incontinent, and unable to feed herself."
"I had a feeling that she was neurologically intact enough to understand what was going on, so I talked to her as much as I could when I was in the room. Talked to her about her daughters who had called every day, her husband (who hadn't called, but I left that part out), the weather, her horses, her students who had sent a card. On the last day of my workweek, her daughter from out of state had finally found a flight up. They sat in silence and held hands for hours."
"Visiting hours ended right at shift change, so I walked in to give report as the daughter was saying goodbye. The patient then spoke what I knew were going to be her last words- 'I'll always be looking after you." And pointed to her daughter, and then at me, and then she fell asleep. Two days later when I came back to work, I was informed she had passed away in the night."
"adventures"
"One of the most challenging moments I had with a patient that was passing was a woman in her 80's with advanced dementia and trying to recover from a severe bed sore that had gone septic (from a nursing home with a bad reputation). She often confused me with her second husband, her daughter told me I looked a lot like him. The patient would often talk about "our" sexual exploits including swinging and partner swapping as well as very wild "adventures."
"I had given up on trying to tell her I was not her husband because I just confused her and upset her so I learned to just play along. She talked to me often about "our" children and other family and many non-sexual adventures they had. It made her happy to talk about it and often left me with a smile."
- Hobie642
"quite a few"
alfred hitchcock noir GIF by Warner ArchiveGiphy"My husband isn't a nurse, but he is a police officer. He has heard "quite a few" dying declarations at crime scenes. People confessing to crimes, witnesses to crimes or telling cops all the info about something. It is admissible and he had to write everything down. Crazy stuff."
It Happens...
"I was speaking with a nurse and she said that a lot of patients pass away alone because they don't feel right passing over with other people present. That is why you have a lot of people waiting bedside, then go home and 10 minutes later... the person passes away. Apparently happens all the time."
A Sliver Lining
"My dad loves small town auctions and over the years he collected all those boxes of stuff that would go for the lowest bid. He amassed quite a collection, filling the garage and a workshop out back. He always promised Mom he'd sell it all some day in some big garage sale or auction of his own."
"Then one day my mom's cancer returned and the doctors told us this time it wasn't a fair fight. Two weeks before she passed I was sitting with her in the hospital. We'd run out of things to say. She looked up at the ceiling, trying to ignore the pain, and said, "Thank God at least I won't have to deal with your dad's stuff." Me and mom burst out laughing. Don't tell my Dad."
See ya soon...
"The last conversation my grandma and i had before she died was when she was dozing off and i was watching Ghost Adventures. She asked if i really believed in that kind of stuff. I told her yes and when she died she can come back and haunt me to prove me right. She just said, "oh ok" and went back to napping. She died the next week."
"speeding up her pass"
Love You Goodbye GIF by truTV’s At Home with Amy SedarisGiphy"My aunt was a nurse and had some pretty strange stories about it. I think the worst of all was about another nurse that was brought after a car crash. She was terrified about someone "speeding up her pass" because of her injuries. She told my aunt that was a common practice and admitting doing it herself several times."'
School Daze
"There was a gentleman on his deathbed at 56 years old. He was pissed off yelling that he started at an early age going to preschool-- to get into the right grade school --to get into the right high school-- to get in to the right Ivy league University and high paying job. That was the year he was to set up his family for life being able to fund their college and pay off the mortgage. This went on for about 4 hours before he passed. Truly tragic."
For Grandpa...
"My mom and I look very similar, the only difference is our hair color (she's got black hair and I'm blond). But when she was my age, she bleached her hair, so functionally I just look like my mother in her 20s. My grandfather went downhill in his last year and his Alzheimer's got worse, to the point where he didn't know a lot of people. But he could recognize me, not as his grandchild, but as his 20-something year old daughter. I played along, and got a lot of stories out of him. They're fun memories, but they hurt all the same."
A Memior
"I'm an intern and I work with the elderly at a day centre. A 90something year old man (who was very loved by everyone) was committing euthanasia (which is legal in the Netherlands) that afternoon. He still wanted to come to us. All the nurses and social workers were pretty emotional for his last day. It can be weird to talk to someone in the morning, knowing they will end their lives that afternoon."
"I got to go on a walk with him. I was pushing his wheel chair and we just talked about life. That one hour he taught me so so so much about life. He told all about his trauma from WW2, about how it affected him and about how he overcame it. He never told anyone, not even his wife, about everything that happened. He gave me so many life lessons that day, and I will be always be thankful for that."
"Zoot Suit Riots"
"Worked in a nursing home for about a decade doing hospice, rehab, and all kinds of long-term care stuff. Anyway, I had a fellow who had worked at the Army Film Unit in LA during the war. As he was dying, when it looked like he wasn't going to make it through the night- I sat with him and just talked. He was remarkably lucid the entire time. He told me that he'd been present at the "Zoot Suit Riots" and had stabbed a man to death and was never prosecuted."
"I never could find any evidence of anyone having been killed during those 5 days in LA when the riots took place. Maybe he killed someone not related to the fray at all. Anyway... he also told me about getting a BJ from Rosemary Clooney in a bar on Sunset so, who knows."
Accept People
Episode 9 Hug GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy"Doctor here - working in the deep south I've heard a lot of patients regret disowning their gay/lesbian children and the relationship they could've had."
"Unfortunately rigid religious/political dogma tears apart more families than most people realize. Life is short. Accept people, especially the ones you love, for who they are and not who you would like them to be. That's always been the takeaway lesson I got from hearing these stories."
Leaving Canada...
"My first year as a nurse I worked in palliative care. Had a 28yo dying of cancer. She moved here from Canada to be with her boyfriend who left her a year after moving. We weren't expecting her to deteriorate so fast. I held her hand as she died alone without her family or friends."
"But right before she died, she told me she wished she never left Canada and cried. Her family were overseas and couldn't make it in time. It's memorable to me because it reminds me to tell my family I love them regularly and to spend time with friends and to stop making excuses."
I hope the nurses and death crews out there are keeping journals. Some of this is tragic, but most of it is comedy gold. Oh my.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Guilt. That is a big one for me. I hate guilt, mostly because I wish I could avoid it. And guilt finds a way to pile on quickly with age. I'm starting to feel it.
Screw Ups
Sorry Dog GIF by swerkGiphy"When you screw up and a bunch of people were impacted. You're ashamed and have apologised but everyone's still pissed and too polite to mention it but you know they're all still steamed."
- qw-rty
"this isn't too bad"
"Broke my back during an accident a few years ago. Made a full recovery, but the night after they put chapstick sized screws in my back to hold it all together remains the most painful and miserable experience of my entire life. Woke up from surgery thinking "this isn't too bad," then entered the depths of hell a few hours later when the anesthesia faded."
"Fun fact: There's a limit to how many painkillers they can give you right after you've been under complete anesthesia. They increased the dosage the next day and i was alright, but that first night was something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy."
Upchuck!
"The feeling before you throw up really warm saliva, stomach hurting and heart moving."
"Oh man. Finally deciding to throw up at 11 PM after an all day hangover with nothing in your stomach. I've done it quite a few times. It's so brutal in those first few moments. Eventually you do feel better than before though. Don't be like me. Make the choice to throw up early. THROW UP LIKE A MAN!!"
Anxiety Issues
"Dealing with post partum anxiety. During a little family drive all was well until I looked at the dash. I had a panic attack over the gas gauge being close to E, despite us near a gas station and fine for money etc all of that. Absolutely bonkers panic attack. It was completely unwarranted yet it happened. I'm currently working on it with CB Therapy and it's been helpful."
Oh No!
waking up no GIFGiphy"Suddenly remembering something very important you were supposed to do at work at about 10 at night."
How are you feeling so far? I've had more comfortable reads. Some of this is giving me anxiety. And that is the last thing I need. But alas, here we are. I suppose we should continue.
Unease!
Scared Breaking Bad GIF by davidsaracinoGiphy"That dread in the pit of your stomach when you don't know if someone you love is alive or dead. I wouldn't wish that on anyone."
Silence
"Looking around and realizing there is no one you can really talk to anymore."
"Had COVID in March and had to isolate, when I was having a really hard time and believe to be COVID induced panic attacks... had no one to call just felt like a bother... not a good feeling."
- Amasse24
"I'm forced to be alone because my family wants me to come back home. I just wish they weren't trying to isolate me and force me to please a bunch of rich designers because honestly I'm heartbroken miserable and sad all the time. I just don't feel like I can connect with anyone anymore because everyone is constantly in their head imagining things about me instead of just talking to me."
Farewell...
"The death of a loved one."
- Deckham
"Especially if it's sudden, even if they're older. I lost my grandmother a few months ago to an accident, she always seemed so strong, like she'd live forever. It feels the same as when I lost my aunt, almost 13 years ago, to a brain aneurysm. She was only in her 40s. Losing both of them hurts in a different way than when someone passes after a long illness."
One Sided
"When you love someone, not only just care for them and appreciate their presence, but truly love them. You can't imagine a moment without them, a future that doesn't include them or a lifetime that isn't besides them. they are your muse, your motivation, and everything in between, without them, you feel less. they make you the person you want to be. Well when the feeling isn't reciprocated, that can suck majorly."
- chey5
PROOF!
Jim Carrey Reaction GIFGiphy"Everyone accusing you of lying when you're not actually lying and no way to proof it."
Death, lies and despair. At least they don't last forever, just until the next round. Next time you feel this yuck, try to breathe and smile. I don't know, It can't hurt.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Sometimes it is juicy though, and those times...well. Those are the ones we tell everybody.
"People no longer bound by their NDA, what can you now disclose?"
Here were some of the juiciest answers.
The Cola Wars
coca cola GIFGiphy"Not my own but from a family friend. Coca Cola and Pepsi regularily settle disputes behind closed doors on things like employees trying to quit and join the competitor."
"Their employment contracts have entire clauses stating you cannot be employed by the competing companies even after you quit so to protect company intel and confidentiality."
"For example, a Coca Cola employee feels like he is being mistreated by the company so he quits and tries to work for Pepsi."
"So Pepsi's legal team will inform Coca Cola as soon as they find out and Coca Cola will sue the guy for breach of contract and in return Pepsi will pay them."
"This is done so Pepsi and Coca Cola don't sue each others into bankruptcy for breach of laws regarding industrial competition and market regulations. Basically a peace treaty of sorts."-JazzPhobic
Behind The Mask, Who Are They?
"I was part of the beta testing for DC universe online. I remember a few missions that were voiced probably just by developers, before they hired the voice actors to do it."
"I wish I had saved footage of it but there was one where Supergirl was clearly voiced by a man doing a high-pitched falsetto voice. One of the funniest things I've ever seen."-DrumBxyThing
Hollywood For An Evening
"Not sure if I'm no longer bound or not or how common knowledge it is, but living in NYC I was paid to be a fan at a major red carpet movie premiere for a popular film franchise."
"100% of the people there were paid to act excited as famous actors and a VERY famous director walked out and said hello and did interviews. We were under strict instructions not to let anyone know we were hired."-LearnedToUnicycle
See? We told you--sometimes, it's just corporate America. But sometimes it's test runs of (now well-known or defunct) products:
A Good Idea In Theory
"Cheetos Clean Paws. I worked in market research and Frito-Lay tested these back in 2007, I think. The concept was Cheetos that didn't leave orange dust on your fingers."
"What that translates to is Cheetos with an edible lacquer sprayed on them. But they tested very poorly because they tasted like they had edible lacquer sprayed on them."
"My coworkers and I referred to them as semi-gloss Cheetos."-darkisright
No More Drama
"I signed an NDA for a predominant American show where they take a certain type of business on the brink of failure and 'transform it' to save the business."
"When the producers of the show found out my wife and I both worked there, they tried to fish through our relationship for tv drama."
"When they found out we have a solid relationship, they tried to convince us to fake our drama with scripted conflict. Long story short, we got fed up and quit during shooting. We were cut from the show. Oh well."-unholyXwater
Hollywood Conspiracy Come To Life
"I used to work for a company that tracked ticket sales for theaters across the US. By contractual agreement with Hollywood studios, we collected information for approximately 80% of theaters, but we were not allowed to collect that last 20%. Why?"
"You may have heard of Hollywood accounting. Hollywood studios work very, very hard to ensure their accounting is as beneficial to the studios as possible. No surprise; all businesses do this."
"But Hollywood has unusually high amounts of money in very narrow products, creating a distorted market. And the industry is rife with films grossing obscene amounts of money but not reporting a profit."
"Because our company couldn't collect that last 20% of theater data, it wasn't possible to absolutely say that a movie made X number of dollars."
"So, I can't prove it, but ...On Friday, June 21st, 2002, the movies "Minority Report" and "Lilo and Stitch" were both released to great fanfare."
"Minority Report's opening weekend was reported at $35,677,125 (27.0% of total gross)."
"Lilo and Stitch's opening weekend was reported as $35,260,212 (24.2% of total gross)."
"This is a lie. Lilo and Stitch earned more money than Minority Report its opening weekend. 20th Century Fox couldn't have a Tom Cruise feature film being beaten by a f**king cartoon."
"So someone at 20th Century Fox called Disney and offered a deal. Since the full amount of money earned couldn't be proven, Fox would announce that Minority Report was the top earner for the weekend. In exchange ..."
"We never knew what the exchange was. We simply knew that Minority Report was reported as the top earner and Disney received some benefit for not saying anything."-OvidPerl
And They Say American Industry's Dead
"Used to work in a warehouse where we made feminine hygiene products. The pads came out of one machine into several different branded boxes. Both the nickel gas station pads and the 10 dollar a box pads."
"Also we had one product of pads where we imported them from china, then repackaged them into our own boxes. I didn't have a problem with that. The problem I had was the box had an emblem saying 'made in America.'"
"Would've been ok if it said assembled in America. But no."-GGATHELMIL
Studio deals, scripted drama, and failed products? What else can fall under an NDA? Let's find out:
Duck Soup
"Used to work for Disney. They only used Disney employees for the test screenings of Marvel movies so I got to see Guardians of the Galaxy 2 (already great) and an early version of Doctor Strange that needed A LOT of work."
"When we were giving feedback to the moderator the writers were sitting in the back with their heads in their hands looking very defeated."
"It was a confusing mess but they fleshed out the characters more so it was better by the time it was released. Oh also they used to kill a lot of ducks with pyro at Disney World when they did the IllumiNations show at Epcot. Shhhhh."-meany_beany
Doggos Deserving Better
"Adogo is a doggy daycare in Minnesota that made me sign an NDA for two years saying I was not allowed to talk about the company mainly, sadly, because they treat the workers and dogs like sh*t."
"No care for how many dogs were packed into a room, which is both unsafe for the dogs and the dog attendant. Often I'd be alone in a small room with up to 25+ dogs, most who only had the most minor of behavioral tests done to see if they would play well in daycare."
"Owner also tried to get around not paying my worker's comp when I did get injured on the job, and whenever anybody put in their two weeks after realizing what a toxic work environment it was (which was often) he would punish them with scheduling them all week or make them open to close 12 hours for all their shifts."
"If you're in Minnesota and looking for a reputable dog daycare: STAY AWAY FROM ADOGO. If in the Twin Cities I would recommend Dog Days, not perfect, but they actually seem to care."-Gday613
The Bee Problem
"I used to work in a call center that had Bayer Advanced (yes, THAT Bayer) as a client. Bayer knew/knows full well that their neonicotinoid based pesticide/gardening products killed bees and were responsible for colony collapse."
"We were instructed to bold face deny and/or lie to the customer or caller if we were ever asked about it. We were also instructed to lie about the spray nozzles on the bottles."
"Bayer knew they sucked and were almost always completely DOA defective, but they refused to admit it and decided it was cheaper to just keep mailing replacement nozzles."-wizardswrath00
Everything from a doggy day-care to an evil corporate overlord who knew full well their product was harming the earth can be covered under an NDA. The lack of specificity of what an NDA can be used for, in part, is responsible for this; the other part is the human beings can really be a little scummy.
In the instances where the NDA protects the integrity of a working project, we see the (likely) original intended use. Are you under any NDAs right now? And when they're up, will you go on and spill all those secrets?